Gently Used Vehicles


    “Bounties have become popular, once again. While they never really went away, with the emergence of splicer beasts, fast moving villains jumping boarders like they were playing checkers, and just general difficulty in dealing with certain grades of criminals in general most nations have started giving bounties for all sorts of issues they just want to go away. Hunting splicer beasts, wrangling the Kaiju back into the depths of Lake Superior, and catching super-villains is all a way to get paid bounties, small and large.


    “Just don’t forget to do your taxes properly. The IRS will come after you all on their own, and no one wants that.”


    Andrew Fitzgerald, Analysis of Public Service and the Heroic Age


    “I’ll mention him to Penny next time she checks in. No rush to discuss him right now. They''re relaxing and he’s not an immediate issue. Other than him being a toymaker, he getting into  flow?"


    “Oh yeah, he is fitting in well enough. Solaris may accidentally think she hired him and start paying for his projects. Did the PR guy give you anyone else to talk to?


    "His team sent over a list, and I''ve been screening it and contacting the ones I agree with. There''s a few who are just a bit derivative in the list, but I can see how they don''t quite see it. It''s a developing media universe in a lot of ways."


    “I can see that, there are only so many ways to replace an engine and dissect a car. It really comes down to personality.”


    "And knowing where you need to change up the format or do something different. We have the advantage here of being able to facilitate larger projects since we can help take the equipment cost load off people, and it justifies why we have some of the stuff we have."


    Erika nodded, “anyone on your shortlist, or looking to sign on?”


    "Oh, we''ll have plenty of takers, no worries there. The wander the country doing restorations set alone will be in and out of here all the time. I''ll make sure to warn them I need to know what lift they''d need, if they need one."


    “That’s good, Badger said he’s having his tools sent up, so he’s planning on being long term, though I doubt anyone else will be able to use his tools if he is a breakthrough.”


    "Huh, I''ll have to ask him where he''s staying. And we''ll make sure he has his own tool cart, even if that means getting another tool cart." she chuckled. "One marked with warning signs."


    “I’ll head back down. we should have the Lexus stripped down in a couple of days, especially with the extra hands.” Erica went back down to see the boys deep in conversation over the engine.


    "Let me guess, it''s in worse shape than we thought." She said as she approached. "I mean, we did buy the cheapest of the model we could find, with a good body and interior."


    “Oh yeah, a monkey would have maintained it better” Levi said, “Whoever stored it didn’t drain any of the fluids and thought oil change was a dirty word. And it smells like burned flowers, I think someone put essential oils in the coolant.”


    "Why... what? Okay, fine. That''s just stupid. I''ll get the Sawzall, we can just start cutting shit out." she grumbled.


    Levi smiled, “I love seeing you in Demo mode.” He held the saws out to her.


    "Of course, you already got it. Well boys, stand back!" She called up her vision, taking a good look at what was where through the whole of the engine’s mass, then began cutting with abandon. "Bow before me, you stupid engine!"


    “Your girlfriend is hot.” Badger said giving Levi a pat on the back.


    "I know, right."


    Solaris sighed, “Well that was exciting.” She rolled the enormous snakes hide into a huge roll. “Pity about the boat. Looks like we still have the cooler of snakes.” She looked around “Oh, what about snake eggs?”


    Penny’s eyes followed where Solaris was pointing, at a pile of a dozen eggs half buried in the mud. "Oh god, we better take those too. If that was the momma, they’re going to be some Kaiju things. We can find someone to hand them over to, and hopefully avoid the Snake that ate Miami. I''d smash them, but you never know what that''s going to do with weird, mutated splicer-monsters."


    Solaris packed the eggs carefully in their lunch cooler. She put the hide and coolers on the remains of the boat. “Well hop on we will fly back to the city and drop these off.”


    Sighing, Penny climbed on board. "I''m telling you now, if we are looking at boats and a criminals submarine shows up, we''re turning around and leaving the area. I mean it."This novel''s true home is a different platform. Support the author by finding it there.


    “Deal.” Solaris said with a laugh taking off and heading for the city. “Whoever oversees Miami is going to need to look for the slicer in the Everglades. That snake was not natural. Do you need to report it to an Unloc office?”


    "No, we''ll just tell Florida wildlife. It''s not going to be the strangest thing they delt with this week."


    “Do you think the eggs will hatch? Their parent was lovely, if murderous.”


    "Oh lord... maybe? No idea. I have no idea where we''d keep them."


    “Maybe the zoo can look at them? They might also be normal snakes, maybe the big one was looking for a snack. You suggested I get a pet. Though it may be awkward if I have it’s parent turned into shoes and a handbag.


    "Reptiles aren''t sentimental, as a rule."


    “True. But now you’re curious what’s in the eggs aren’t you.” Solaris teased. As they got closer to the boat dock.


    "Yes, damn it." she muttered. "But I''m not feeding any Chthonic horrors."


    Solaris laughed. “Push comes to shove we can donate them to zoos, they enjoy splicer beasts,


    "Yeah, they tend to draw the crowds."


    Solaris landed on the dock setting down the remains of the boat. “Sorry, ran into a rather nasty slicer beast, where do I turn in the snakes we caught?”


    "There''s an office over there that handles it. I''m, I mean you''re going to have to pay for that boat. It’s in pieces."


    "I''ll authorize the payment for it." Penny said. "Go turn in the snakes."


    Solaris picked up the box with a half dozen pythons in it and carried it to the office. “Hello, I am here to turn in some snakes. I also have some eggs, but I think I’d like to keep those if it’s alright with you. They came from a slicer-beast nest.”


    "Um, if you want to keep them, that''s up to you but I''d really suggest not, unless you''re qualified to deal with, um, those."


    “I’m not too worried. If I can’t handle it, I have contacts who can.” I am sure my Tailor has the contacts for a Wrangler who can help me hatch and home them. She thought to herself. “I’ll keep them toasty till I can get them to a proper expert.” Thinking on it I should call the Tailor anyway, he is going to want that white snake hide.


    "Right, well as long as they aren''t kept in the Florida ecosystem, it''s not our issue." The man said. "Sign here, and would you like the bounty as a check, or in Amazon Gift Cards."


    "I don''t need the bounty, put it towards conservation of the everglades.” She said with a smile. "Please have a lovely day." She went back down to Penny. "Is the boat all sorted out?"


    "Of course.”


    They headed back to the hotel to clean up, neither woman wanting to smell like swamp water. Once clean Solaris dialed up her Tailor. Hello, sorry to bother you. But I ended up in a bit of a tussle with a slicer beast. I ended up with a cooler full of eggs. Do you know any Wranglers in the area who could help me with them


    "Hmmm. A Reptile expert wrangler. I know a few who could help. Send me the information you have on the eggs and their parents, if you know what it was, and I''ll have them reach out."


    "I know one of the parents, which is the other thing I was going to ask, would you like an acid-resistant white serpent skin, it''s about 80 foot long and I’d say about 2 yards wide?


    "Well, you do know how to give gifts. I''d rather love such a thing. I have a client who would die for things made from it."


    "I''ll admit I would like a purse and shoes, but that will not touch the yardage this thing has, and it is rather tough. I had to use the blade from my utility belt and quite a bit of strength to skin it. Do you have somewhere for me to ship it to from Florida or do you have someone you want to pick it up?"


    "Send me your hotel information. I''ll have a messenger come pick it up. I''ll forward you their name and photo, so you know who to expect."


    "I am at the EB hotel in Miami." Solaris said. "I didn''t want the hide sitting and spoiling so I called you as soon as i got out of the shower.


    "They''ll be there in an hour."


    "I mean, really? The damn bot drew a knife on me till you told him I was allowed to be there." Marcus said, popping open a coke as he sat on one of the chairs in his and Nahoa''s small house near the gate. Nahoa, Levi, and he were sitting in the living room, having gotten home from getting the older boy some extra clothes and such since Grandma Ruan hadn''t had a chance yet, focusing on the girls as she had.


    "Like he could have hurt you, Bluelight Man."


    “Are you sure? I mean who knows what crazy shit Badgers put in it.” Marcus complained. “And no, I am not using that as a hero name!”


    "What, Shit Badger? That would be unique." Levi teased.


    "I don''t know, it has a certain something."


    Marcus flipped both of the other boys off.


    "In all seriousness, I asked him about that. Just the knife and a taser. He apparently did more with another bot build and showed me the scar it gave him when he decided it wasn''t working right. He also said something about that thing, being why he needed a new workspace. And something about a Karen that is in some way related to all of that."


    “Well, that’s good, though Chuck seems to like me.” Nahoa said. He saw a bright yellow car coming up the road. “Hey maybe that is our seafood. One good thing to come outta Covid, you can get anything delivered.”


    "That''s for sure. That is one roached paint job though." Levi said. Marcus frowned, and stepped outside, the other boys following to help carry the food in as the car stopped at the gates, the figure inside reaching for the button. "We''re right here, don''t worry about, wait, Z?"


    “Fuck. Marcus? Thud? What the hell are you doing here?” An insulated delivery bag was sitting next to Zoya as her car almost growled, seemingly angry at being in park.


    "We kind of work here. This is Levi. Levi, this is Z. Zoya. We know her from Manhattan, though I have no idea why she’s this far out on Long Island."


    "Or why she''s delivering food. That''s new, so''s the car."


    “Hey d-dash is a good job, and the tips out here are better. I got the car from working my ass off, got it for Six hundred fifty off Craigslist.” She opened the bag holding out their food. “And the asshole I call dad won’t cost me a job out here.”


    "Okay, under a grand, that''s a deal, but open your hood for a second, would you." Levi said. "I think you have a problem. Did you hear a bang a little while ago, by chance? Did the steering get stiffer?"


    “A bit, but Banana has always been a bit heavy in the wheel.” She reluctantly opened the hood as her car made another angry sound.


    Levi looked into the engine bay, sighed, and leaned back. "Shut it off. I know what''s wrong."


    "If I shut it off I''m going to have to jump her to get her going again. and it''s Friday night!” Zoya said, not paying attention to what he said. “The Wine and Xanex moms are starting to forget their diets and order food.”