Chapter Eighty: The Second Mission, Part 2


    “Are you okay?” Neena asked. “You looked tired and sad.”


    “I am,” Yue replied. “Has Xander come back yet?”


    “No,” Neena responded. “And Captain Kol isn’t happy. He’s saying that he’ll need to discipline him.”


    “Damn,” Yue told her. “I’d really hoped he’d be back by now.”


    “We all do,” Neena said. “Are you sure you don’t know what happened?”


    “Yes, I’m sure. I miss him just as much as you do, and I’m hoping he comes back soon. I need him.”


    Neena smiled. “I’m sure he’ll be back soon, we just have to be positive.”


    “Mhmm, I’m done with being positive,” Yue responded, frowning. “Do you know where Alyx and Aster are?”


    “They left about an hour ago, and they haven’t come back since,” Neena replied. “Something’s happening with them, and I’m super curious to know what it is.”


    “I think they’re hiding something as well,” Yue told her. While she was sure part of the reason they were gone was the Nullifiers, she also felt they were hiding something else, say, the cry she had heard from the cabin. “But I wouldn’t worry about it too much. If it was anything bad, they would’ve told us.”


    “Yeah, like you told us what’s happening with you?”


    Yue started. “What do you mean?”


    The blonde girl sighed. “Yue, you killed rioters on purpose! You got knocked out for some reason, and no one knows why, and then Xander disappears. After that, you leave for no reason, just like Alyx and Aster, and you won’t tell me why!”


    “Nenna, I—” Yue hung her head. “You’re right, okay? I’m hiding a lot from you, but I promise that I have a good reason for it. I trust you completely, but some secrets must be kept for safety.”


    “I believe you,” Neena replied. “But I’m a little scared. What if our group is splitting up? Or maybe just breaking up into smaller groups?”


    “Of course that isn’t happening!” Yue exclaimed, hugging the girl. “Why would you think that?”


    “I thought we were all getting closer as a group. The seven of us,” Neena said. “Especially when Diamond died and we got involved with Zade. It really felt like our group was closer than ever, and I was so happy. But then Poli died, and there were just six of us, and now Artemis has been present but distant, like even though he’s with us, we can never touch him. And then there were five.


    “Now, you have a relationship with Xander, and I’m so happy for you, but now you’re hiding secrets with him, and he’s gone. As much as I know you don’t want to, you’re both getting distant, too. And then there were three.


    “And finally, Alyx and Aster, you know what I’m talking about. With them growing distant and hiding things, it makes me…And then there was one.


    “I don’t want to be alone, Yue.”


    “I would never leave you alone, Neena!” The warrior exclaimed. “Do you remember the day of the battle?”


    “I almost died, but you saved me twice.”


    “Exactly! I would do anything to save you, and you know that! Why would I leave you alone?” Even though Yue was fighting her, she saw her friend’s point. It did feel like they were growing farther apart, and she couldn’t help but blame herself for it.


    “I know you would die for me, Yue, and I love you more than you do me,” Neena said, “But is that enough? Love isn’t enough, not if everyone’s going to separate places.”


    “We’re all still in the Vanguard, and as long as that’s true, we’ll be together.”


    “Well, what if we don’t always stay in the Vanguard?” Neena whispered, opening up Yue’s churning gut. “Xander’s on thin ice, Artemis looks like he’ll commit suicide any day now, and Aster and Alyx are out doing something that is getting in the way of vanguard duties. Meanwhile, Kol is probably not happy with you going out when the Vanguard needs to prepare for the coming conflict. How can you be so sure we’ll all stay?”


    “When did you get so mature, Neena?” Yue said.


    “When Diamond died,” The girl responded, “I knew I wouldn’t be the same person. But you’re dodging my question, Yue. Answer me, please, or you won’t convince me!”


    “We can’t be sure of anything, but—”


    “Don’t say some vague bleeding crap, Yue,” Neena’s glare turned the Sterkona to stone. “I’m not a child!”


    “I don’t know anything,” Yue replied, sighing softly. “I don’t have an answer for you, Nee. Your worst fears may come true. But to me, it doesn’t even matter. The Horde is coming, and it seems they’ll wipe us out. Kol won’t expel any of us as long as the threat hangs over us, and all we have to do is survive till then. After that, we’ll all be dead, and it won’t matter.”


    “So, you’re saying no matter what happens, we’re doomed?” Neena asked, a lonely tear escaping her. “There is no hope anymore, it’s done?”


    “It’s how it seems,” Yue replied. “You don’t know how dire the situation truly is, and if you did—”


    “But I never will, because I’m alone in this!” Neena screamed. “It’s already started, do you realize that? I’M BLEEDING ALONE HERE! What am I supposed to do if all of you are off on your adventures, and here I am wondering what the bleeding hell is going on, not knowing if any of you are going to die or leave, and I’ll be truly alone, a shell like bleeding Artemis, or even if whoever is after you or Alyx comes after me and leaves me like bleeding Poli. What are you going to do then, Sterkona? If you’re dead, or I am, will you still die for me? Where will the promise be then?”A case of content theft: this narrative is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.


    “I—” Yue backed away, her mind spinning. “Neena, why—”


    “See, you don’t know anything now, eh?” Neena choked, her nostrils flaring in sadness and her face contorting. “All I want is to be with my friends, but now they’ve left me! You’re leaving me, Yue! And you know that.”


    “I do, and I’m sorry. I promise to try to be better.”


    “Are you going to involve me in whatever is happening, then? Will you please let me help?”


    “You can’t do anything!”


    “So that’s how it’ll be then?” Yue’s friend asked. “No matter what, you’ll still leave me in the dark, until everything explodes and you need me on your side to fight. Well, news flash: I don’t care anymore. If you want me to fight for something I don’t know about!”


    “It hasn’t even been a month since the battle. Give it time, please.”


    “Time is the last thing we have. According to you, we have a bleeding month to live. Less, now. No,” Neena began to cry, these words clearly hard for her to say, but she stood up anyway and opened the door to her barracks. “When you need someone to fight, don’t come for me. I’m done acting like the last straw. I don’t need to do everything, or anything. I just want to feel like you actually care.”


    “I do care.”


    “I know you do, but next time, don’t throw me under the bus,” Neena whispered, then slammed the door.


    Yue collapsed on her bed. Neena may not have all the context, and so was misunderstanding some of the problems, but she was right. Not all of it was Yue’s fault, but there was definitely a huge portion that could be accredited to her. Sadly, she couldn’t change any of it. In fact, she’d been noticing how alienated she’d been to her friends for a while. When she, Kol, and Yiro had been recruiting the new vanguard members, she’d completely ignored any friends outside of her core group, like Joanne. And not long after that, she’d turned only to Xander and Alyx. Neena was getting neglected, and it was a problem, as yue did feel so much affection for the girl. The girl didn’t deserve any of it, and Yue understood the reason she wanted to leave the group.


    It still stung, though, because it only proved Neena’s point. The group was fading. Two members were dead, one was depressed and refused to talk, another was in the throes of the death cult, another two acted like they were the only people on the planet, one was a famous warrior, and the other was…well, that was the problem. Neena seemed like nobody, and that was the problem.


    Yue couldn’t process this alone, but that was the problem. Normally, she’d have xander to talk to, but he was gone. The Cult had promised he’d be back when she finished her job, so where was he? Did the Cult lie to her? Did Xander die?


    She needed to take a walk, to clear her head of all her problems. If she didn’t she felt she would burst. As she left her barracks, she watched as the sun began to rise. The night was ending, and the light was shining through. Normally, Yue would feel good, remembering that the light always beat the darkness, that that was just the way of the world, but she couldn’t say that that day. It just wasn’t true anymore.


    “WHERE’S XANDER?” She screamed at the air. “I KNOW YOU CAN HEAR ME! YOU KNOW WHERE HE WENT! TELL ME!”


    Nothing, of course. The cult didn’t care, as always, and Yue balled up her fists. It wasn’t fair for her to be…


    “Excuse me?” An elderly voice called to her. Looking up, Yue found an old woman smiling at her.


    “How did you get here? Who are you? You know you’re not allowed here. You should really leave now!”


    “Oh, I know, but nothing ever stops me,” The woman smiled. “I couldn’t help but notice your distress, and I felt I needed to help you.”


    “How can you help me?” Yue responded bitterly. “I’m too far gone, and I don’t know anything anymore. Who are you again?”


    “I didn’t tell you, Sterkona!” The woman told her. “But you can call me the Infinite.”


    “What the hell kind of name is that? No offense, but I’d never name my daughter Infinite.”


    The Infinite shrugged. “Just a quirk, I guess. But I can help you, Yue. You see, I have eyes everywhere, and I couldn’t help but notice your boyfriend wasn’t okay.”


    “Xander?” Yue grabbed the woman’s shoulders. “Where is he?”


    “In heaven, probably,” The Infinite told her. “Last I saw, he was heading towards the field, the one that used to house the Arena, and he was carrying a sharp knife. He didn’t look happy.”


    “I need to leave,” Yue whispered. “I must go, now.”


    “I need to talk to you. Can I reach you sometime?”


    “Anytime,” Yue responded quickly. “I just need to leave.”


    “Of course,” The Infinite responded. “I’ll see you around.”


    But Yue was already gone.


    — — —


    It took Yue just over twenty minutes to reach the Arena, her lungs screaming at her to stop, but her mind fueling her as she sprinted for the field. The sun was already bright enough to see Xander when she reached the field, and it looked like she was right on time. Whoever the Infinite was, she’d wanted Yue to reach Xander when he was still alive.


    Although it didn’t look like he''d be that way for long, as he was holding a knife to his wrists. He was chanting something, his eyes closed, almost like a prayer.


    “XANDER!” She screamed. “WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO HIM!” She sprinted again, her chest heaving, until she reached her boyfriend.


    “Yue,” Xander whispered, his voice normal. He wasn’t possessed, so what was happening? “I’m so sorry, but I need to do this!”


    “What’s happening?” She asked.


    “I woke up, in a house, and…” He closed his eyes again and his brows furrowed. He was sad, but trying to hold it in. “I couldn’t believe it, but my sword was bloody and I was killing dozens of people. Soon, it will be all over the news. I didn’t know who the people were, but I chopped through all of them without even knowing it.”


    “And so you decided to kill yourself?” Yue asked. “I didn’t think you’d go that far.”


    “Neither did I,” Xander admitted. “If I didn’t know that I was putting you in danger.”


    “What are you talking about?”


    “It doesn’t take a genius to realize the Cult is doing something with me, and it seems they’ve gotten to you, considering you killed those people in the riot. They’re blackmailing you, aren’t they? I want you to be free and if this is the way I must do it, then so be it.”


    “No,” Yue told him. “You dying would be the worst thing that could happen. This is what I’m stopping.”


    “I know, but am I really worth it?” He asked.


    “Yes! You are.” Yue placed her head on his chest. “You can’t go, I need you. Please reconsider.”


    Xander sighed. “I don’t know if you can change my mind, but…I’ll think about it. I promise to give you a second chance. I know you’re tired of me threatening to leave or kill myself, but I just want to protect you and love you and be with you.”


    “That’s what we all want,” Yue told him, thinking of Neena. “But is it enough anymore?”