“One sec Sweetie” John grinned malevolently and teleported her across the room.
“What the actual... Dad - why?” Evie stumbled and put out a hand to the door frame in order to right herself.
“To see how many reserves it takes to move you obviously. It might be handy to know how many reserves I need to keep in “reserve” to give us an escape option?” John replied, scanning his log. It definitely hadn''t been revenge for her earlier snarky comments. Definitely not. “And... you my dear are no longer allowed chocolate!”
“Get stuffed old man. Chocolate is life! That felt really weird. Let me guess no reduction due to weight?”
“Good guess Short Stuff. It’s ten reserves to move either of us. It says you are 53% of my weight limit, tubby, so no reduction other than the distance one. I can jump us both a hundred metres out of a pickle as long as I have a fifth of my reserves.”
“Are you happy now?” She said, giving her old man a stern look.
“Weirdly yes, and me from yesterday would be freaking out. Which is kind of making me freak out but not as much as I think it should. Something funky is going on in my noggin, Sausage.”
“Just like normal for you then." She smirked at him, "let''s go launch the Great Sky Rat War of 2024. Death to the feathered pests! The scouring will commence now!” she declared grandly with a fist in the air.
“You know the Australians launched a war on Emu’s? They didn’t win.”
“Emu’s are massive, Dad. I''m not surprised.”
“Yeah but they had guns.”
“They gave the emus guns?” she asked incredulously, "now that''s mental!"
“No dopey, the Aussies had the guns!”
“Well that’s pretty embarrassing then. Any other random wars humans have waged on birds that failed? Perhaps a broader historical perspective will allow us to not die to air strikes of poop.”
“Uh, I think the Chinese had a war on sparrows once? Not sure.”
“Fascinating,” she drawled sarcastically. “Let’s go murder some pigeons. We can call it a special military operation if it makes you feel safer?”
“When this is over you and I are going to sit down and have a talk, kid.”
The abandoned club was at the corner of Back Lane before it turned to go into the marketplace, just down the way from the medical centre and a couple of minutes west from their house. John and Evie had moved to Normanby six years ago and the club had been derelict long before then according to things locals had told John.
They left through the backdoor and the gate next to the garage. John''s drive was more moss than concrete, getting it power washed hadn''t been a priority for a long time. They stepped into the street and it was just as it always was. Terraced houses facing off against each other with scraps of grass in front. The autumn sun shone down gently, warm for this time of day.
They moved off west, heading towards the library. As they got to the snicket they heard a startled shout from ahead of them and they both flinched. The streets were eerily silent. It was early but you would expect more people about. Some dog walkers or people bustling off to work but they had seen no one yet.
"What the hell! Fucking wall!" came a stressed out voice. John and Evie moved forward to the bend in the snicket so they could see ahead.
They got to the corner and saw a young woman dressed in joggers and a t-shirt scowling at the wall at the end of the snicket.
"Are you ok?" called John uncertainly.
Her head whipped round. She was young and pretty with long blond hair tied back in a ponytail.
"Did you see that shit too? I''m too fast now! This is too fucking strange!" she scowled, looking down at her feet that seemed to have betrayed her.
"We got the message as well, we were going to try and get some Essence!" called Evie. She leant in towards John and murmured "she''s cray cray!"
"Do you want-" John began.
"Screw this! I''m going back to bed and calling in sick!" The woman stormed past John and Evie heading out onto their street and disappearing from view. They could hear her cursing and muttering to herself for some time after she passed out of sight.
"Not handling it well?" asked John, pointing a hand after the woman.
"What is it you always tell me? ''People are weird, Evie,''" she adopted a gruff voice, "I''m guessing she isn''t a gamer. Or normal. Who goes running at this time in the morning for fun? What a weirdo."
"At least we know we aren''t the only ones left, I suppose. The quiet was starting to freak me out."
They moved on. Their destination wasn''t far and they didn''t see anyone else on the way. The old club sat on the corner with a straggly overgrown patch of ground that may once have been a gravel parking area but was now essentially scrubland. The windows were all boarded up as were the main doors at the front but enough of the boards on the upstairs windows had been knocked out by kids throwing stones or simply by time and the weather causing them to sag.
Ever the opportunists, a substantial part of Normanby''s population of pigeons had set up shop inside, the boards on the upstairs windows beneath the gap they used to get in and out were streaked with the evidence of their passing. The place hadn''t been the site of drinking and dancing into the wee hours for twenty odd years and the husk of the structure was starting to show its age and lack of repair.
“So what''s the plan? To get inside I mean,” Evie asked.
“Good question... should have brought an axe or a crowbar I guess.”
“Even if it''s dead quiet, wandering around town with a splitting axe over your shoulder and hacking through a door would raise some eyebrows Dad. Even at this time of day. In fact that would raise some eyebrows at any time of day. Do you think they all just went back to sleep except for the crazy lady? For once I''m actually grateful you disturbed me, normally it''s just nagging me to get my breakfast cos ''It''s half eleven child, you''re not a teenager yet so stop acting like one, get out of bed now.''” She finished in the gruff voice which was an undeniably accurate impression of John''s “Dad” voice.
If you spot this narrative on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.
“Well you aren’t a teenager yet however much you think you are," he sighed, "I honestly don''t know, kid. Maybe they are hiding under the covers freaking out? Maybe they figured it was a weird dream and rolled over to go back to sleep? Maybe one or both of us has had some sort of psychotic break and we’re actually just drooling and rocking back and forth in a corner of the living room. I have to assume this is real though and not a dream. When I banged my head it hurt like the blazes and should have snapped me out of a dream. I think? Is that how dreams work?”
“Who knows? Or cares dad? You always go off topic! Focus! How are we getting in there?”
John and Evie began examining the main doors and found that despite the age and lack of care they were solidly locked and boarded. They were not going to be brushed aside easily or quietly. They went down the side of the building and stopped by a window. None of the boards were loose but one had not been set in place correctly and left a narrow gap that John could see through.
“I''m going to blip you in”
“Through that gap? Are you sure abo... ut this? Eep!” She finished from the other side of the window.
John appeared next to her a moment later and said “Yes.” Evie punched him in the arm.
Looking around they found the first floor was a large open area, the remains of a bar at one end and everything was covered in dust and the filth that accumulated with long periods of neglect. Bits of wood and plastic lay strewn here and there and the stairs up to the second floor rose from the far side of the room, curling up from behind where it looked as though the bar had once been. The floor was marked where tables had been fixed down around the dance floor, said dance floor having been ripped up so only the rough floorboards beneath remained. A constant cooing echoed down the stairs confirming their quarry was at hand.
“I''ll go first and start draining, if they freak out can you blip them away from the exits to stop them escaping? Any getting away you send them over to me and I''ll fry them,” Evie whispered.
“OK kid, let''s try and keep it quiet, we don''t want to draw any attention. This is technically breaking and entering. Although it''s more “breaking the laws of physics in order to enter”, I still don''t think the Police will be A-OK with it.”
They moved as quietly as they could up to the stairs and began to creep slowly upwards. Aged wood tends to shift and warp if it is left unattended for long periods and the staircase was no different. A series of quiet creaks and groans emerged with every step they took, each noise making them both wince and pause to check the noise from above. The birds didn''t seem to notice judging by the constant cooing remaining unchanged as they both moved slowly and carefully on to the last step and crouched down by the banister.
Several of the pigeons noticed them and fluffed themselves up but they didn''t seem to feel any sense of danger and quickly went back to ignoring the Father and Daughter Extermination Squad.
“Can you move whatever that is to block the window with the board missing? In case they freak out,” Evie whispered, pointing at what appeared to be an old door that had been removed from its frame and left lying on the floor.
John nodded and with a blip the door appeared almost completely blocking the gap in the window and plunging the room into darkness. There was a slight thunk as the door settled into place that made John wince. The pigeons, being ineffably stupid birds, were briefly startled but quickly settled back down. At this moment John realised he was little more intelligent than the winged rats. He had switched the orientation of the door from horizontal on the floor to almost vertical against the window while blipping it. A new trick that should have been obvious to him from the start. It also occurred to John that humans need light in order to see and this might be a problem.
“Damn, can you still see them?” he asked.
“Not with my eyes anymore. I can sort of sense their, um, energy though. Maybe it''s like with blind people getting super hearing but I can kind of “see” the electricity in them. I think I could do this all along but I''m just used to seeing stuff with light and didn''t notice. It’s really weird.”
The unsanctioned extermination quest was already paying out rewards in innovation and hidden secrets it seemed.
“Alright then, start with the ones on the ground. The ones on the rafters will drop and scare the flock,” John murmured.
As previously mentioned pigeons are not terribly bright and the gentle chorus of coo''s gradually diminished as each pigeon settled on the floor fell into unconsciousness and was unceremoniously shoved into the final slumber from which no feathered thing can return. John sat in the dark and did literally nothing, listening to the gradually reducing volume of the pigeon chorus as the members died and watching the Log entries tick in.
Team member Evie Borrows has killed x28 Harmless Pigeons. Each team member has gained 1.4 essence.
John nudged Evie gently and gestured that they should creep back down stairs. Once they got to the bottom they moved away from the stairs.
“I am become death! Destroyer of sky rats!” Evie whispered.
“Chill your beans kid. Lets level and see what we get in mods?” John suggested quietly. “After you child” he said with a gentle smile. Evie grinned and nodded.
“What the hell?” she exclaimed quietly. “It says I need two Essence to get to level three!”
John tried and got the same result. “We should have thought of that shouldn''t we really? We play enough games to know that you need more xp for higher levels. Still, we needed one essence for level two, two for level three. Do you think it will be three for level four? That seems like they want us to power level really fast. Coupled with the mods being multiplicative when they aren''t plain weird and rude, we''ll get very powerful very quickly. Let''s go bag another dozen of the feathery bastards and then come back.”
Three minutes later and having sent twelve more unfortunate pigeons to the great nest in the sky, they were back where they began just inside the main door downstairs.
Team member Evie Borrows has chosen to spend two Essence and advance to Level 3.
Levelling in process...
Evie Borrows has chosen to modify Ability.
New status for team member Evie Borrows:
Level 3
Name: Evie Borrows
Ability: Electrogenesis
Constitution: 100%
Reserves: 200
Guidelines:
Maximum Discharge: 240V
Line of sight required.
Modifications:
Level 2: Reserve capacity X2
Level 3: Waste not Want Not. When you drain energy beyond 100% overcharging your next Zap rather than going to waste, the excess energy is used to invigorate yourself and your team members, providing a temporary buff that boosts reflexes and reserve regeneration. Buff duration is refreshed when reapplied. You''re kind of a vampire but with electricity instead of blood. Rather than science you fall back on horror tropes? Emo Kid!
“Cool but I am not a bloody Emo Kid!” Evie said. “Remember to check the log when we go back upstairs and see what it actually does.”
“I thought you were going to go with efficiency to begin with? Meh, it’s your build sweetheart. What are our reflex scores, do you think? I don''t like hidden stats. Let me level up and we can go finish the pidgies off.”
John Borrows has chosen to spend two Essence advance to Level 3
John Borrows has chosen to modify Ability.
New Status:
Level: 3
Name: John Borrows
Ability: Teleportation
Constitution: 100%
Reserves: 100
Guidelines:
Maximum weight: 500kg
Maximum Distance: 1km
Line of sight required
Modifications:
Level 2: How about we split the difference? You always were a cheapskate. Maximum cost reduction due to efficiency bonus'' increased to 99%
Level 3: Weight limit x5