Chapter 106: His denial
"Sir, the business meeting with Lewis & Co. will be held next week on Friday" Roy reported to Tyler.
Tyler''s blue eyes focussed on Roy who was reporting on his schedule, his blue eyes looking as chilly as ever.
"Is that so?" Tyler replied as he took out a cigarette and put it between his lips.
"Yes sir, and Jen Lar-"
"Don''t talk about her. Don''t report to me about her in the meantime" Tyler said as he showed a face filled with annoyance.
"Yes sir" Roy answered. Although he was very curious about his change of mind, he was wise enough not to get himself in trouble for the sake of sating his curiosity.
What Roy did not realise was that ever since Jen was publicised on the news with Lucas, Tyler was not able to think about anything else but her.
Although his previous reckless behaviour with women was not only degrading, but new to him. When news about Jen reached his ears, he was not able to look at any other woman much less desire them.
He was constantly reminded that she was doing better without him around and that was hard for him to ept. He fell into his thoughts a lot of times when he thought about when they were together.
Even though it was difficult to do so, he had to admit that he had taken her for granted the whole time they were together because she was more in love with him than he was with her.
He had taken advantage of her feelings and the sense of control he had over her was addictive. The fact that she was willing to give in to his demands on numerous asions really did not help his ego.
He had thought that he was fond of her and the impact of their break up had not really settled in until she started dating someone else. That was when he actually realised that he had had feelings for her, feelings that he had taken for granted during the three years they dated.
Although he hated to admit it, it looked like she was happier with Lucas than she was with him during their three year rtionship. She had given him so much and he had only taken from her without giving her anything in return.
What he was feeling was abination of guilt and self hate and even though he was going through such emotions he was still having a hard time epting them. He tried rationalising why he should not be feeling them in the first ce and justifying his past behaviour but it all just resulted in a vicious cycle.
He knew that she was going through a hard time but had never made a move to help her initially and offering help afterwards felt slightly awkward so he never bothered.
On the day they broke up he had called with the intention of rmending awyer that could have helped her but instead ended up threatening her with a break up.
His selfishness had ruined the dynamics of their rtionships and when he had missed her and wanted to see her he ended up threatening her with a break up.
Thest thing he was expecting on that day was her actually biting the bait and breaking up with him decisively. She would normally try to appease him whenever he did so since she knew he was just acting up from not seeing her.
In this aspect, Jen just thought that he was a bit immature throughout their rtionship. However, in that specific day, Tyler had really caught her at a bad time and his thoughtless actions had resulted in such an oue.
He had hoped that she would call himter to talk but she never did and he was too proud to do so himself so the whole situation ended up resolving itself. However, the resolution had put him in a very awkward position and because of the dynamics of their rtionship he was unable to apologise and coax her so they would get back together.
He had learned to look out for himself from a very young age and would never put himself in a disadvantageous position so even when he was in a rtionship with someone who had proven numerous times that they were in love with him, he had ended up twisting the dynamics of their rtionship in such a way that it would be difficult for him to take initiative to do anything.
To some extent he felt that their break up would do her good, but he was selfish enough to think that their break up had also caused a huge loss for her as it did for him, and the only difference was that she was able to find someone else to connect with unlike him who was still stuck in what he believed were his dyed feelings.
Jen had been the one to pursue him in their rtionship which automatically put him in an advantageous position. What he had not expected when he had a rtionship with Jen was that he would be in his current situation.
In fact, he had tried to dissuade her when she had first approached him but her persistence had won him over entirely. She had propositioned him and after a while of currying favor they were an official couple.
He was her first everything, her first kiss, the first person she had slept with and because of that, he had thought that he was an irreceable existence in her life.
This just went to prove that at the end of the day, the firsts were not sufficient enough to keep a rtionship, much less a healthy one.
He could not count the number of times that he had wished that he could turn back time to that day he had impulsively broken up with Jen and instead do what he had intended on doing in the first ce.
"I don''t think I should listen to anything concerning her so don''t talk about her with me, Understood?" Tyler said as he looked at Roy.
Although Roy did not notice, Tyler''s eyes were slightly ssy and wet which just showed how vulnerable he was currently feeling.
"Inform father of my schedule and make sure there aren''t any incidents" Tyler said as he stood up and walked to the window his back facing Roy. He did not want him to notice the vulnerable look in his eyes.
"Of course" Roy replied.
After hearing him Tyler turned and looked at Roy before his lips parted into a very charming smile that was rarely seen.
"You will apany me to City X" Tyler said as he turned and looked out of the office window once more.
"Yes sir" Roy replied he had almost sighed at his misfortune. He did not want to apany this prince but he did not have much say in the matter
"We''ll discuss the arrangements some more at another time" Tyler said finally lighting his cigarette. An action that prompted Roy to leave his office.
He stood looking outside the window for a while and paused when he had taken out his third cigarette. He had suddenly remembered how Jen hated it when he smoked and heughed at himself when his thoughts had wandered to that direction. He felt truly pathetic.