Chapter 52: Became dirty<blockquote>


    52nd Became dirty</blockquote>


    Xena: Theres a few cutscenes here that might be confusing to some, so I added some emojis to make it clear. Happy reading. Also, this is a <em>rollercoaster of emotions</em> and the end is a bit scary, although not enough to be nsfw but, <em>fasten your brains seatbelt for safety</em>.


    Chu Yu was lying on the bed, tossing about and unable to sleep.


    He wrapped his quilt tightly around him, closed his eyes, and brewed1Turns out, Chinese people have put a term on the time youve closed your eyes to sleep, but still havent slept yet and are making yourself sleep. Its called brewing your sleepiness or mulling over it. It simply means hypnotizing yourself to sleep. Now that I typed this out, I realize how weird it is that for us to sleep we need to fake sleep first.. But not only did he not fall asleep, on the contrary, he became more and more awake.


    It was raining outside the window, creating a fine pattering sound. Usually, Chu Yu wouldnt notice it, but he found it particrly annoying tonight.


    <i>So noisy.</i>


    Chu Yu pulled the quilt up and swiftly covered his head.


    He remembered how Lu Shi stood up and opened the bedroom door to let him return first. Picturing himself sleeping on his own tonight, his hands suddenly tightened on the quilt.


    <i>If Im sleeping by myself, then Ill sleep by myself. Ive slept by myself for more than ten years anyway.</i>


    His heart seemed to be blocked by a damp cotton wool, quite suffocating and ufortable.


    He pulled the quilt down again, showing only his eyes which stared at the wall.


    On the other side of this wall, there was Lu Shi.


    Chu Yu himself couldnt figure out what was in his heart, so he felt awfully sad.


    He felt that heChu Yu himself was probably being unreasonable.


    Lu Shi was very alienated and indifferent to others, and if he wasnt, then he was quick to punch and extremely fierce.


    However, although Lu Shi didnt talk nor reveal much to him, Chu Yu was sure that Lu Shi had truly withdrawn his defenses and barriers, letting him rely and depend on him.


    Lu Shi was cold and difficult to understand, but he was really good to him.


    But maybe it was exactly because of this that Chu Yu felt so sad.


    He obviously still hadnt said anything, but Lu Shi had pushed him out of the dorm room and closed the door.


    Lu Shi didnt trust him.


    Turning over, Chu Yu changed his posture. Instead of staring at the wall, he stared at the strelitzia by the window. Then he found that he couldnt remember how long he hadnt watered it for. Lu Shi had been taking care of it the entire time.


    He turned his gaze to his desk and shelf. Everything was neatly arranged.


    He didnt know when Lu Shi had started helping him tidy up the pens, paper andic books hed misced.


    Chu Yu looked around at this time, only to discover what it meant to moisten all things softly without soundFrom the Tang Dynasty poet Du Fus Wee Rain on a Spring Night: The good rain knows its season, When spring arrives, it brings life. It follows the wind secretly into the night, And moistens all things softly, without sound., and what it meant to noiselessly seep inch by inch. Lu Shi was just that.


    Hed even gotten to the point where hed always wanted to grab the corners of Lu Shis clothes when it was time to sleep. If he didnt have anything in his hands, hed feel empty and unustomed.


    Chu Yu knew that no matter who he faced, hed subconsciously draw a clear line. Deep inside, he was afraid afraid that if he wholeheartedly trusted someone and asked for their feelings, he wouldnt get any response in the end.


    Such as what happened with his mother.


    Hed always protected himself very well.


    But towards Lu Shi, that boundary line of his was as if drawn using light smoke. When a small breeze blew, it cleared. He even took a step forward of his own volition, telling Lu Shi, you can take a mile more.From win an inch, want a mile


    Hed sold himself cleanly.


    Thinking about it this way was so infuriating!


    But regardless how angered, it was a fit that onlysted a second or two.


    Chu Yu also felt wronged <i>I sold myself this cleanly, what do you still fucking want from me, Lu Shi?</i>


    Being muddleheaded, he didnt sleep well all night. He had a series of dreams, woke up, and didnt remember half of it.


    Chu Yu changed his clothes with a long face, stuffed warm babies into his pockets, and headed to the ssroom.


    Downstairs, he happened to run into Dream-Ge who was holding a ss bottle in his hand, his expression filled with great bitterness and deep resentment.


    Chu Yu was curious. Whats with your expression? Your faces almost wrinkled into a twisted spring rollChinese twisted spring roll: .


    Dream-Ge shook the ss bottle in his hand. My mother gave it, swallows nestSwallows nest and where it came from (Yes, the bird makes it with saliva): . Do you know what a swallows nest is? Its a swallows spit. Laozi feels a great deal of nausea just thinking about it, really dont know whats supplemented by eating this stuff!


    Auntie asked you to drink swallows nest tonic? Chu Yu pondered. Isnt it to let you nourish your yin beautyYin is characterized as an inward energy that is feminine, still, dark, and negative. But mostly feminine as its counterpart yang represents mostly masculinity.?


    Hey, that makes sense! Sure enough, a person more is an IQ more! Dream-Ge was enlightened. School Flower, if you say it like that, it really is possible! He looked around, and seeing no acquaintances, he whispered, I went back this weekend and was interrogated by my mother. She found out that I have someone I like. I thought Id be doubled by my parents2 vs 1, I didnt expect my mother to be extremely worried instead.


    Worried about what?


    Worried about my looks, if I cant chase after the girl, and that shell dislike me instead. She also said that many girls nowadays dont like my type  burly and muscr  they like those flowery, beautiful men!


    Dream-Ge was bewildered. Say, is it because of this that my mother told me to eat swallows nest? To maintain beauty?


    Chu Yu thought that this logic waspletely fine.


    The two of them had solved the puzzle. Dream-Ge happily finished the swallows nest and remembered. Eh, somethings not right. School Flower, wheres Lu-Shen, whys he not with you today?


    Chu Yu managed his expression well and naturally replied, Why, cant he not be with me anymore?


    Its weird to me that Lu-Shen isnt with you, its really mystical. You and Lu-Shen are almost glued together, if either you or Lu-Shen were a girl, Old Ye wouldve called you guys for a talk.


    Chu Yu didnt react. Talk? Talk about what?


    Puppy love ah!


    Dream-Ge sighed deeply. Ai, I actually really want Old Ye to call me for a talk. I want to have that puppy love, I want to hold hands, I want to give away my first kiss that Ive treasured for more than ten years, but I have no fucking chance to!


    Chu Yu was a little lost in thought.


    Dream-Ge was still chattering. Speaking of which, the girl I liked invited me to go to the grove yesterday. I was nervous for a long time and gave myself a lot of mental preparation. Unexpectedly, she seriously lectured me about derivatives for an hour!


    A daydream-induced smile appeared on Dream-Ges face. But I liked her more and more. When she told me that knowledge, her voice sounded so good!


    Chu Yu was a little ill at ease.


    He sat down in his seat. The back table was still empty as Lu Shi didnt arrive yet.


    Zhang Yueshan was arguing with Li Hua about the solution to thest question of a midterm exam, sighing with emotion in passing. I almost didnt finish the question!


    Li Hua replied, This times math test was quite difficult. I did it slowly, but I solved thest two questions in a hurry. Im not sure how many points I can get.


    Dream-Ge heard them saying modest remarks and having a conversation between top students, so he quickly slipped back to his seat.


    Chu Yu held his chin with his hand and waited for their previous topic toe to an end before asking Zhang Yueshan, ss Rep, what do you think about the rtionship between Lu Shi and I?


    You two? Your rtionship is very good!


    Then ss Rep, who do you have the best rtionship with?


    Zhang Yueshan reached out to pat Li Huas shoulder. Of course its my deskmate! Were the ones whove heard each other grind their teeth and talk in their sleep!


    Li Hua pulled out an English test paper to write on, then lifted Zhang Yueshans hand in disgust. Dont make noise, Im writing a letter to myself!


    Chu Yu questioned again, Then if one day, you two are eating out together and a girles asking for Li Huas contact information, how would you feel?


    Zhang Yueshan carefully thought about it. Is that girl pretty?


    Pretty.


    Of course its to hurry my brother, charge! Its not easy for someone to fancy you. Ill help you find 18 ways to chase girls, 50 dating tips, and so on for you to memorize!


    Suddenly, Chu Yu was at a loss.


    Zhang Yueshans reactions and thoughts were the norm, right?


    However, when they were having barbecue that day and a girl came to ask Lu Shi for his contact information, he was instead relieved when he heard Lu Shi refuse.


    Zhang Yueshan was keen. School Flower, are you in a conflict with Lu Shi?


    Chu Yu shook his head. No.


    Zhang Yueshan breathed a sigh of relief. Thats good!


    Lu Shi didnt attend morning self study.


    Chu Yu frequently looked at the door of the ssroom, but didnt see the persone in from beginning to end.


    Zhang Yueshan came back from the office and told Chu Yu thetest news. Lu-Shen requested a leave of absence.


    Chu Yu was startled. Leave of absence? I I didnt know.


    It probably happened quite suddenly. Zhang Yueshan exined in detail, Old Ye told me that there should be something urgent on Lu-Shens side. Yesterday, at three oclock in the morning, he took a leave of absence and left the school that very night. Old Ye was worried that something major had happened in his family so he asked if he should apany him, but Lu-Shen didnt borate and refused.


    Chu Yus fingers hooked the strap of his school bag under the table as he asked in a quiet voice, How long was the leave he asked for?


    It seems to be for two days. By the way, the midterm exam papers are nearly done, and the ranking can be posted at noon today. Lu-Shens definitely first, no guessing needed, but I wonder who got second ce this time.


    Chu Yu actually didnt clearly hear what Zhang Yueshan was saying. Voices entered his ears but couldnt pass through his brain. He clutched the strap of the bag with his fingers, feeling empty in his heart.


    Child, if youre reading this that means this is a stolen trantion from Xena. Pls go to dummynovels(. and give justice to her blood, sweat, and tears there.


    ???


    Lu Shi got off the bus right as the sky brightened. After looking for an address for a long time, he finally arrived at his destination.


    It was in an oldmunity dating back to 20 or 30 years ago. A bicycle was parked on the roadside, where ginkgo trees grew tall. Their leaves were about to fall and only a few pieces were left on their branches.


    Lu Shi climbed the stairs to the third floor. He raised his hand, and it took a few more seconds before he knocked on the door.


    After a while, the door opened, revealing an elderlydy. She pushed up her presbyopic sses and asked Lu Shi, Youre the one who called?


    Lu Shi nodded. Its me, sorry to bother you.


    The olddy pushed the door open a bit, letting Lu Shi enter while urging, No need to change shoes, Ive packed my luggage already for my flight in the afternoon. Its aplete mess everywhere, this ce probably isnt as clean as your shoe soles!


    Lu Shi followed in and closed the door behind him.


    The olddy washed an enamel cup, poured water, and handed it to Lu Shi.


    Seeing Lu Shis gaze fall on a ck and white photo frame, she exined, My husband has passed for more than half a year now, while my son and daughter immigrated a few years earlier. They arent assured that I, this old woman, can be alone here in the country and asked me to go abroad. I cant bear to part from here, Im afraid that my husbands spirit wille back and wander around in this old house. What should I do if he cant find me? But a few days ago, I fell down which caused my children to be so anxious. I considered it and thought, might as well go and just take the old mans picture with me so he can be with me all the same.


    Lu Shi quietly listened.


    The olddy neatlybed the hair on her temples as she collected her emotions. When people get old, they like to talk about these trivial matters, itsughable. Are you still studying?


    En, high school.


    The olddy nodded. You came here, so what do you want to ask me?


    Lu Shi took out an encrusted photo pendant from his bag and opened it. There were two photos inside. One was an ID photo, the other was cut from somewhere and also had the same woman in it.


    She looks a bit like you, she is?


    Shes my mother.


    Lu Shi inquired, May I ask if you have an impression of her?


    The olddy took the pendant and examined it carefully through her sses.


    After a long time, she said, If youe and ask about other people, I reckon I wont have any impression of them but this person, I still remember something.


    She recalled, I remember this girl clearly. My husband and I used to work in a clinic. At that time, those without good circumstances who couldnt go to the hospital to birth a child could onlye to us. The first time Id seen her was when she came over with a big belly, saying that she was going to abort the baby. At that time, she had been eight months pregnant, so how wouldve that worked? It was too dangerous. If anyone wasnt careful, she could die. When we asked her, what about your husband? she just cried.


    And after that?


    Later, the girl left and only returned two dayster. Still, she told us that she wanted to inducebor. I consoled her by saying, youre so beautiful, I wonder how beautiful your child will be when theyre born. But she looked like she had been in a very bad state of mind, so I thought that there might truly be some difficulties that could arise. Finally, I said, you think it over again for another night, if you still want to inducebor,e over tomorrow.


    She came over early the next morning. We told her all the possible dangers and the girl nodded andid down on the operating bed. Her tears kept flowing, wetting the hair on her temples. When my husband started disinfecting, she suddenly sat up and ran outside hugging her belly while crying and shouting, dont do it, dont do it, dont hurt my child.


    Lu Shis throat ached.


    The olddy was ovee with emotion as she narrated.


    After more than a month, she knocked on the door of our clinic in the middle of the night, sweat all over her forehead. I noticed that she was about to give birth, so I quickly helped her in andid her down. Shed been in terrible pain, but the child just wouldnte out. Pitifully, she hadnt given birth even after dawn. I boiled an egg for her and she ate it. Then she took my hand and told me that if a mishap urred, I must protect the child.


    The olddy returned the pendant to Lu Shi.


    Lu Shi opened his mouth to speak, but didnt utter a sound.


    He unconsciously retracted his strength while clenching the pendant tightly enough to feel pain in the palm of his hand. Only then did he mutter hoarsely, Was she fine after giving birth to the child?


    Quite good. Although shed been tormented while giving birth, she hadnt suffered any more guilt since then. She held the baby, crying andughing, smiling quite beautifully. During the first few days of her convalescing, Id gone to see her and taught her how to put the child to sleep.


    The olddy recalled carefully, Later Later, she moved out before she could finish convalescing. I think it was because of the neighbors gossiping in themunity. You dont know this, but those people are used to chewing the back of their tongues and can jab at someones backbone until it breaks!Those neighbors can gossip until they break someones confidence/self-esteem


    If youre still reading this on a vile, pirate, aggregator site, know that you are missing on pictures of the food here in Bite Your Fingertips and all the fun staff shenanigans Xena has been posting on dummynovels.


    ? ?? ?


    During evening self-study, Chu Yu was called by the homeroom teacher Old Ye to his office to talk about life. The main reason was that his test scores this time had dropped a little bitpared to previously.


    He worked hard on English and was steady in the second year, but his results in the rest of the subjects were pretty miserable.


    Chu Yu had a good attitude; he sat upright, listening carefully to Old Yes harping until the bell signaling the end of ss rang. Chu Yu returned to the ssroom, carrying his empty school bag. He slowly squeezed into the elevator going downstairs and returned to the dormitory.


    Passing by Lu Shis door, he knocked on it, but it was quiet and there were no sounds inside.


    Chu Yu dropped his wrist and stood there for a while before heading to his bedroom.


    He seldom carried his key.


    The rain had ceased, but it was wet and cold so Chu Yu stepped barefoot on the carpet and went to close the window.


    The cold air was cut short.


    Chu Yu fished out his phone and sat on the carpet to y games.


    He couldnt help but remember what Lu Shi had said yesterday.


    In his mind, it repeated again and again, and the more he thought about it, the more he felt that Lu Shi had done it on purpose.


    Purposely letting him discover; purposely letting him hear.


    Even if he didnt identally press the y button yesterday, Lu Shi wouldve found another chance to let him hear it.


    Then tell him that he was monitoring Fang Weiyuns phone calls.


    The character he was manipting on the screen died again and the frames stopped. Chu Yu was about to exit when his phone rang.


    The name disyed on the screen was Lu Shi.


    After blinking his eyes a few times, he realized that the phone was still ringing so Chu Yu answered the call. Hello?


    This is yourst call for this chapter, Ill keep pestering you on the next ones. Its so sad you cant see the emojis Ive been putting between these cutscenes.


    ?????


    sighhh, just where have you been reading!!! Go to DUMMYNOVELS nownownow!


    Passing through a narrow alley and stopping in front of a small roll-up door, Chu Yu panted


    Lu Shi had brought him here once, to borrow a heavy duty motorcycle. He barely remembered the way.


    After standing for a while, the roll-up door opened and Lu Shi walked out.


    After just one day, Chu Yu felt that Lu Shi there seemed to be something different about him.


    Standing in ce, he saw the neon lights flickering light shine down from the roof. Chu Yu was inexplicably a little nervous as he called out, Lu


    He only spoke halfway through when he was hugged by Lu Shi.


    Lu Shi was very hot, his body faintly smelled of liquor and his arms were like chains as Chu Yu was held tightly in his arms.


    Chu Yu didnt dare move. He wanted to ask what was wrong, but no less than two secondster, he noticed that Lu Shis back was trembling slightly under his palm.


    Something moistened the skin on the side of his neck, dampening it.


    Lu Shi was crying.


    Lu Shis rough voice sounded beside Chu Yus ear, She gave birth to me, but I killed her.


    <i>She?</i>


    Chu Yu boldly guessed, <i>this she should be Lu Shis birth mother?</i>


    His train of thought was interrupted when suddenly, Chu Yu was pushed against the wall behind him by Lu Shi.


    The wall was cold and hard. When Chu Yu went out, he had put on ayer of thick clothes which now acted as a cushion.


    He subconsciously called, Lu Shi


    Lu Shis eyes were deep and dark, suppressing emotions that others couldnt distinguish.


    His fingers pinched Chu Yus chin, and Lu Shi stubbornly made him face his eyes.


    Lu Shis eyes were red, but Chu Yu noticed that because of the tears, his eyshes and the ends of his eyes were wet.


    His heart also became ufortable.


    As if afraid that Chu Yu would say something that would refuse him or make him unhappy, Lu Shi covered Chu Yus mouth with his hand, then shifted forward and leaned close to Chu Yus ear, huskily saying while full of malice:


    Chu Yu, my bloods so dirty. Youve sucked my blood and became dirty with me.


    The author has something to say: Heres a coconut shaped into a heart ~<ul><li>1Turns out, Chinese people have put a term on the time youve closed your eyes to sleep, but still havent slept yet and are making yourself sleep. Its called brewing your sleepiness or mulling over it. It simply means hypnotizing yourself to sleep. Now that I typed this out, I realize how weird it is that for us to sleep we need to fake sleep first.</li><li>2Chu Yu himself</li><li>3From the Tang Dynasty poet Du Fus Wee Rain on a Spring Night: The good rain knows its season, When spring arrives, it brings life. It follows the wind secretly into the night, And moistens all things softly, without sound.</li><li>4From win an inch, want a mile</li><li>5Chinese twisted spring roll: </li><li>6Swallows nest and where it came from (Yes, the bird makes it with saliva): </li><li>7Yin is characterized as an inward energy that is feminine, still, dark, and negative. But mostly feminine as its counterpart yang represents mostly masculinity.</li><li>82 vs 1</li><li>9Those neighbors can gossip until they break someones confidence/self-esteem</li></ul>