Ep 89. What Is It That You Truly Desire? (3)


    Thwack!


    “Ow! Mother, what made you so violent?!”


    Rozerre rubbed at the ringing pain on his forehead, reddening from the flick it’d just suffered.


    However, his mother only crossed her arms in discontent. Her expression read no remorse whatsoever.


    “I believe I’ve already told you to behave yourself, Rozerre.”


    “Bloody hells…a thousand years and I’m still being told to behave…”


    “Growing older is all the more reason to behave!”


    After another few minutes of bickering, Rozerre finally managed to return his attention to the dragonlord across the tavern table.


    “…Fine. Let’s say you really are the lord of dragons. Even though it’s utter nonsense, let’s also say you really did kill the Reaper. But the real question yet remains.”


    Rozerre took a moment to pull Aldrid closer to his side. Once the two were a few steps further from the dragons, the child deity asked his question with a narrowed gaze.


    “Why did you kill the Reaper?”


    Aldrid visibly flinched and her expression grew grim, though she didn’t quite intervene as fast as previous times her child had outspoken. Instead, it was Rozerre who turned his gaze and spoke to her first.


    “Mother. Unlike you, I have neither lived with the dragonkin, nor do I think of them as family. The times of coexistence you spoke of never existed in my memory. Man and demon have always been enemies; we killed, or we were killed. Now you’re telling me that a demonlord has not only returned to life, but slaughtered death itself? What guarantee is there that she won’t simply kill us as well?”


    While Aldrid struggled to answer, Raizel’s claws let out a bone-wrenching screech. Her furious scowl deepened further as she took a step forward, fully intent on making Rozerre’s words come true with her own hands.


    “If you want to be enemies that badly, then-”


    But as per usual, Serenis held the youngling by her shoulder, stopping the steel dragon in place. She shook her head, reining in the Raizel’s anger.


    ‘I did hear Aldrid birthed her son after being forced out of the kin’s nest. I suppose this is only natural…’


    Aldrid’s trust in the dragons was practically a given; she was born and raised among the kin, and had spent a significant portion of her human life among numerous dragons. The deity of life may as well have been a dragon herself, if only at heart.


    Conversely, Rozerre was born and raised among humans; he had no personal ties to the dragonkin. The demons he’d seen were all enemies of mankind, enslaved or beheaded in a series of bloody carnivals. When taking this difference into consideration, it wasn’t difficult for Serenis to understand where the little boy’s suspicion was coming from.


    “You’re right, child; you’ve no reason to place your trust in me. But my goal is to eliminate the divinities you possess, nothing more.”


    “So you already know about the shards, then. I can only assume you’ve already gotten to destroying a number of our divinities…that would explain the recent heartaches. They’re all dead now, aren’t they?”


    “…The deity of mana has forfeited their divinity, and yet she still lives on.”


    “Hmph. So in other words, you’d kill us if we aren’t willing to forfeit our divinities.”


    “…That’s correct.”


    Serenis let out a small sigh. There was no point in coating her purpose with delicate words.


    “Your divinities as no more than fragments of disaster in my eyes. I do not care for order, but I eventually seek to destroy all twelve without exception. If necessary, I will not hesitate to kill the bodies that house them.”


    Rozerre’s expression remained hardened at the dragonlord’s declaration.


    It wasn’t because the dragonlords words were threatening; despite the death threat that had been woven into her words, Serenis’ declaration simply boiled down to an insistence of forfeiting one’s divinity.


    Assuming that the dragonlord could truly destroy his divinity shard, then abandoning it wasn’t that daunting of a task for Rozerre; unlike some of the others, his domain had never occurred to him as being particularly useful. And with their divinities gone, there was little doubt that he’d once again be allowed a peaceful life with Aldrid as mother and son instead of being deities.


    But still, Rozerre’s worries stretched much further than the surface meaning of what was being spoken.


    ‘This is nonsensical. What’s the intent behind this?’


    Rozerre was a deity that ruled over the domain of emotions; if Serenis had been lying, the woven deceit should’ve been evident in his eyes. Indeed, the boy was quite certain that the dragonlord was only speaking the truth.


    Alas, he had no way of knowing whether Serenis was speaking the whole truth or not. A half-spoken truth often proved to be deadlier than an outright lie. And because the boy knew this so well, he still couldn’t bring himself to fully trust the dragonlord.


    ‘There’s no guarantee she doesn’t have ulterior motives. For example…’


    After concluding his thoughts, Rozerre cautiously began to speak to Serenis once more.


    “…No demon tribes remain other than the dragons. Should the Twelve also one day disappear, none will be capable of opposing you.”Stolen story; please report.


    “…?”


    Serenis furrowed her brows at the sudden remark. She hadn’t necessarily thought of the consequences her endeavor would bring – of what would come after her quest.


    But in the eyes of an oblivious child, being a demonlord alone was something to be cautious of. That title alone carried a weight that could crush their future underneath.


    “I’ll be frank, dragonlord. It sounds like to me you’re just looking to replace us as a god yourself.”


    “…I have no intention of raising myself to such positions. I merely seek to finish the quest that our kind began.”


    “Do you now?”


    Rozerre briefly turned to face his mother. The cynical look in his eyes plainly showed the boy’s lack of faith in Serenis’ words.


    “Am I to trust a demonlord, mother? One that may very well eradicate mankind once we step down?”


    “Rozerre, Lord Serenis is not like the demonlords you know of. She’s never harbored ill intent towards us.”


    “You speak as if that demon matters to you more than the rest of mankind, mother. Is that because you can create us as you please?”


    “Rozerre!”


    “I merely speak for humanity. If the demonlord truly harbors no ambition to godhood, then there shouldn’t be a problem with using divinity to confirm her intent, yes?”


    Before Aldrid could deny her son again, Serenis interjected.


    “Do as you wish.”


    “But Lord Serenis, placing yourself under a divinity’s influence is…!”


    ‘…Revolting.’


    After having gone through the worst of divinity’s ends with the First, willingly placing herself at a divine being’s mercy was unimaginable.


    But she had to make an exception here. It was seemingly the only way to gain Rozerre’s trust – but more importantly, even if their positions were swapped, Serenis knew that she would have done just the same to ensure the safety of her kin.


    “He merely seeks to ensure his kind’s safety. We’ve no right to deny him.”


    Then, Serenis briefly glanced towards the steel dragon at her side. The youngling had kept silent for fear her temper would worsen her lord’s reputation, but allowing a divinity to influence her lord wasn’t exactly a welcoming enterprise to Raizel, either.


    When the two dragons locked eyes, Raizel’s scowl only deepened.


    “You’re seriously going to let that kid do what he wants? What if you end up like those villagers?”


    “I’m just as afraid as you are, child. And so, I implore you – if something does go wrong, do care to put me back to my senses.”


    “…How?”


    “In any way you see fit.”


    When Serenis smiled at the youngling, Raizel responded with a bewildered snort. But in the end, the steel dragon could only answer to her lord’s trust in kind.


    “…Fine. But don’t blame me if you wake up with a broken bone or two.”


    “I’m sure I’ll manage.”


    ?   ?   ?


    Rozerre took a moment to explain how the questioning would proceed.


    First, the boy would use his divinity on Serenis to control for her inhibitions. Then, a simple question would follow – a question that would check whether the dragonlord harbored any intent to become a divinity herself. Rozerre would withdraw his influence thereafter, and everything would return to normal.


    It was a simple, quick questioning. Nothing else would happen.


    "A simple procedure. Very well.”


    After a moment of absorbing the explanation and nodding her head, Serenis raised her gaze to face the deity of emotions once more. Rozerre briefly closed his eyes in response, then opened them to reveal the reminiscent, eerie glow.


    “…My name is Rozerre, the deity of emotions. By my divine authority, I will hear an honest answer from you.”


    Rozerre’s emerald eyes locked with Serenis’ gaze, and her eyes soon began mirroring the greenish glow. Soon after, the boy spoke his question in a low, cautious voice.


    “Dragonlord Serenis. Do you truly have no intention of becoming a divinity?”


    “…I do not.”


    Once the answer was spoken, Aldrid sighed in relief.


    But contrary to her expectations, her son continued his questioning.


    “Then, for what reason do you seek to eliminate divinity?”


    Before he heard the dragonlord’s reply, Rozerre could feel a sudden tug on his shoulder. When he turned his gaze, he could see Aldrid pulling at his shoulder, her expression muddled with worry.


    “Rozerre, what are you doing? You’ve already heard the answer you wanted!”


    “A single answer is insufficient, mother. It’s a demonlord – one could never exercise enough caution.”


    “…But this is wrong. No matter what answer you hear, that’s…”


    “Please, step aside. This is for our own sake.”


    After shaking off his mother’s hold, Rozerre once again faced Serenis directly. Only then did the dragonlord speak her answer to the question.


    “…To be forgiven. By those who are no more.”


    Raizel narrowed her eyes upon hearing her lord’s answer. It was a response she’d somewhat expected, but it was also a response that she wished she wouldn’t hear.


    Nevertheless, Rozerre continued after only a brief nod. A momentary blink intensified the hue in his eyes, mirroring its effect onto Serenis’ conscious accordingly.


    “One final question then. Dragonlord – what is it that you truly desire?”


    Once the question was asked, everyone’s gaze fell upon Serenis in unison. As reluctant as they were to admit, both Aldrid and Raizel also wanted to know the answer to this question.


    But unlike the previous two questions, Serenis failed to give a coherent answer.


    “…I …”


    “Anything at all. If it’s difficult to speak in words, feel free to show it as well.”


    At Rozerre’s continued urging, Serenis’ expression began to contort. Her body began to tremble, and her hand was slowly raised unto her face, perilously clawing away at the eyes.


    ‘…What I truly desire?’


    To return.


    Time and again, Serenis had wished to return.


    Back to the home she so dearly missed, back to her longing home, back to the sides of those she cherished. If she could return to those precious days more again, she could gladly suffer any fate.


    But that was no longer possible. Now, the past was nothing more than a fleeting dream. Serenis’ trembling body was proof of her dream’s pointlessness – of the things she’d known, but had chosen to ignore all along.


    The world she loved, was already long gone. Regardless of what she would do now, her brethren could never forgive her from their graves.


    ‘Redemption is not what lies at the end of this road.’


    What waited her at the end were the same regrets, the same painful memories. What waited her was a grim future in a foreign star that only served to remind her of her failures.


    Every time she’d gaze upon its lands, she’d remember how different it had once been.


    Every time she’d gaze upon its people, she’d remember the brethren that should have been in their place.


    And when Serenis would gaze upon her kin, she’d never be able to see them as they were. Even now, Raizel’s worried eyes weren’t visible to Serenis at all – what she instead saw was Arkrana, staring back at their lord with a resentful, lifeless stare.


    ‘If absolution isn’t to be…’


    The guilt and duty that had held Serenis thus far began to diffuse and melt. Replacing them now was a single desire, raising its ugly head amidst her expanding greed.


    When the dragonlord’s eyes began to well up in tears, only then did the others begin to realize that something was amiss. But by then, it was too late.


    Slowly, and ever so quietly, a trembling voice slipped out of the dragonlord’s lips.


    “…I wish this world would cease to exist.”


    As her sentence finished, the dragonlord’s body became encased in layers of dim, shimmering lights. But even at this point Rozerre and Aldrid remained frozen in place, unsure of what exactly was going on.


    The first to react was Raizel.


    “What’re you two idiots staring at?! Get out!”


    As soon as Raizel bolted out with a deity in each arm, the tavern became engulfed in a blinding glow. An explosion of starlight obliterated the structure without a trace, leaving Serenis standing alone in the molten crater.


    The dragonlord’s gaze was locked onto the darkening night sky. Her figure was emitting a luminescent glow, almost as if she were a fallen star herself.


    Raizel let out a hollow laughter at the sight of her lord’s silhouette, barely visible amidst the layers of opulent mana around them. Though the steel dragon was hardly versed with magic, even she could feel the intensity of Serenis’ towering presence right now.


    For the first time since reaching adulthood, the youngling’s body was shaking in fear. Survival instincts that had remained dormant throughout the entire century were suddenly flaring back to life, screaming at their owner to flee.


    “…Seriously. Give me a break.”