Marke sat under a concession stand, in the booth furthest from the ladder out. He wore a fresh, level 1 name tag with the name, “Tai Chi” written on it. Marke had a large pile of streamers on the table and he was humming to himself as he wove a basket. Kente hummed along, supplying half remembered lyrics from time to time. With each basket completed, Marke’s mind calmed and the noise level dropped. Marke finished the ninth basket and looked up to find himself surrounded by clouds. The desk person cleared their throat to get Marke’s attention.


    “Ok, just like we planned.” Kente said. Marke remembered the plan, thought it was hard to remember why it mattered.


    Marke walked up to the desk and handed over his name tag. The person held the name tag in both hands, staring intently. With a flash of light, the name tag turned golden colored. The desk person handed the gold name tag back with a smile. “Welcome to heaven.” They said. Marke nodded and almost forgot to do the next step of the plan. Kente cleared his own non-physical throat and Marke remembered to move his mind to the shadow sea. He and Kente did a careful dance of moving the golden name tag into Kente’s hands and the “Basket Weaving” name tag onto Marke’s chest.


    Marke opened his eyes to see the desk person still smiling at him. “Please send me to hell.” Marke said politely. A button appeared on the desk and the smiling person pushed it.


    Security arrived a few moments later and threw Marke out of the sky.


    <hr>


    Marke woke up in hell. He was a bit sore and the red light wasn’t helping a growing headache. He sat up to find the red scaled person blocking the only exit.


    “Marke, hurry up. It is hard to hold on to this golden name tag.” Kente’s voice sounded strained.


    “Roger that.” Marke said. He stood and walked over to the red person.


    “Welcome-” The person started to say, but Marke interrupted.


    “Yeah, yeah. Here ya go.” Marke said. He slapped his name tag down on the portable table. The red person picked it up and glared at it intently. With a puff of smoke, the name tag turned an ugly red. The person handed it back and spat at Marke’s feet. Marke managed to hop back out of the way and avoid a burn. The red person stepped back to let Marke leave the room, but Marke had already dropped into the shadow sea.


    Kente’s arms shook as he held the golden name tag out in front of him, preventing it from joining with the normal name tag. “Marke, hurry!” He said. Marke stepped up and grabbed the golden name tag. With both of them working together, they rearranged all the name tags so that Kente had the golden one, Marke had the red one, and the normal one was held between them. They each carefully pulled back one hand to grab the name tag on their respective chests. With a count of three, they ripped their name tags off and slapped them on either side of the normal name tag. The name tag vanished with a *pop*.


    Marke and Kente stared at each other over their clasping hands. “Did it work?” Marke asked. Kente shrugged. “Better go topside and find out.” Kente said.


    Marke left the shadow sea and opened his eyes just in time to see a goblin with a spear stab him in the chest. Some red text with numbers and “Damage” flashed in Marke’s vision and everything went black. White text floated into his mind’s eye in the blackness.Stolen from Royal Road, this story should be reported if encountered on Amazon.


    <code>You have died.


    Prepare to respawn in 3...


    2...


    1...</code>


    Marke opened his eyes in a dark cave. He looked around frantically for another goblin with a spear, but the cave was empty. Standing, Marke looked down at himself. He was dressed in rough brown fabrics with leather footwraps–the typical starting attire for these realms. Marke shouted in surprise to find his woven basket bag hanging off his shoulder. His shout echoed around the cave for several seconds. Marke cringed at the noise and crept along the cave wall until he found a tunnel. He pressed his bag to his side and entered the tunnel. He walked as quickly as he could without making much sound.


    <code>+1 Cowardice</code>


    Blue text flashed in front of Marke’s face, causing him to stop running and almost stumble.


    “I got tired of waiting.” Kente said. “Looks like it worked, what’s going on?”


    I already died once. Marke complained with his mental voice. A goblin stabbed me through the chest with a spear right as I opened my eyes. So far, the System pops up colored text for damage and stuff.


    Oh shoot. Kente said. No safe starter cave? That’s rough. After a moment Kente continued talking. Why are we running down this tunnel?


    I made some noise back there and it echoed for forever. I’m trying to get far enough away to avoid swarms of orcs from the deep. Marke said.


    Keep your eyes open for a mithril shirt. Kente joked. Marke grinned as he continued to move quickly.


    Marke kept moving until he had passed multiple junctions where his tunnel ran into other tunnels. He settled himself into a gap where a boulder had split from the wall of the tunnel. Probably safe here for a bit. Marke said. Kente, did you notice that I still have my bag?


    Whaaaaaaaaa? Kente replied. Why did you keep your bag? How did you keep your bag? Is anything inside it? Kente asked.


    Oh, I haven’t checked. Marke said. He opened the bag and found his stack of streamer-woven baskets, a pen, and a few odds and ends he won as prizes. I still have everything! He nearly shouted again but managed to restrain himself.


    <code>+1 Stealth</code>


    There’s that colored text your mentioned. Kente said. Priority check! Priority One: Find food and water to avoid suffering from hunger and thirst. He said.


    Marke continued the list. Priority Two: Stay very, very quiet to avoid getting stabbed by goblins.


    Priority Three: Hmmm. Not a good time to do Tai Chi. Find a place of safety where you can do self care. Kente said.


    Priority Four: I could take apart one of these extra baskets and re-weave it. Also, keep an eye out for juggling sized rocks. Marke continued the list.


    Priority Five: Investigate our character sheet or whatever this realm has. Priority check complete. Great job, everyone. Kente said. Marke smiled at Kente’s antics.


    Marke tried to will his status to appear. He tried thinking “status” and “menu” really hard. His status didn’t appear until he whispered “Status” out loud.


    <code>Name: Unknown


    Level: 1


    Race: Unknown


    Traits


    ----


    Cowardice: 1


    Stealth: 1


    Stats


    ----


    Strength: 5


    Dexterity: 5


    Constitution: 5


    Intelligence: 15


    Wisdom: 6


    Luck: 1</code>


    Oof, that luck stat. Kente said.


    Marke shook his head in frustration. Was my luck bad before I woke up to a goblin spear, or is it bad because I woke up to a goblin spear. He said. Marke tried focusing on different parts of his status but nothing happened. He whispered, “Cowardice”, “What is cowardice?”, and “Help”. “Help” got a response.


    <code>ERR: No help available</code>


    Marke spent the next half an hour whispering different words, trying to guess how to use the System. He eventually did find a way to remove the need to speak out loud and he also found his inventory.


    <code>Inventory


    ----


    (14x)Woven basket (ribbon, Common)


    Everflowing Pen (Mythic)


    (2x)Notebook (Common)


    (3x)Demonic keychain (Uncommon)


    Demonic keychain (Rare)


    (117x)Stick (common)


    Water bottle (plastic, Epic, empty)


    Shirt (Common, equiped)


    Pants (Common, equiped)


    Footwraps (Common, equiped)</code>


    Neat. Kente said. Also, hilarious item rarities.


    We should have stolen more pens. Marke said.