《The Handbook》 Character Sheet I narrowed my eyes and glared at my nemesis. I took a long, slow, deep breath and visualized the victory that would soon be mine. Today would be the day that I conquered the stairs. For a brief moment I had a flashback to a moment from the prior week: I had promised my doctor that I would take steps to make my life less sedentary. A promise is a promise. So here I was, literally taking steps. As I passed the second floor I congratulated myself. My breathing was still slow and deep. My legs hadn''t even started to feel the burn. By the 4th floor, I wass huffing and puffing. By the 6th floor, I was dragging myself upward with the help of the handrail while silently telling myself that using the handrail is not cheating. All is fair in love and war. By the 13th floor, I was sweating profusely and my legs were on fire. I felt like I was going to die. However, victory was mine. Someone once told me that some buildings didn''t have a 13th floor due to some superstition about 13 being an unlucky number. I guess whoever constructed this office building didn''t get the memo. As I swiped my badge to get in the door, I silently reflected how lucky I was that I was usually the first person in the office. So none of my coworkers would see the sweaty aftermath of my battle with the stairs. I glanced at the clock on the wall as I walked over to my desk and threw myself into my chair. It was 7:00 AM. It would be at least another hour and a half befefore the office would start bustling with activity. An hour and a half later, I had finished coding 4 new functions and was ready to run my unit tests. I started running my the unit tests and went to the lunch room to start brewing the first pot of coffee. As the coffee was percolating, I greeted a few of my fellow coffee addicts who had arrived and were waiting for the coffee to be ready. Aside from a brief greeting we didn''t really talk much. Only crazy people have conversations before drinking coffee. By 9:00 my unit tests had finished successfully. I was officially done coding for the day. The rest of my day would be reserved for what I generally refer to as "bullshit": meetings, email, phone calls, more meetings...basically every kind of productivity killing interruption you can imagine. As someone who came in 2 hours early and put in a solid hour and a half of work without interruption, I was usually praised as one of the high performers. It was the kind of thing that made me laugh. An hour and a half of focused effort was worth more than any amount of bullshit. It always seemed weird to me that no one else recognized this. At 9:05 I was strolling into the conference room for the daily standup meeting. The daily standup officially starts at 9:00 but I don''t think I had ever seen it start before 10 after. So I silently congratulated myself on being 5 minutes early as I took a seat. Sure, it''s called a "standup" meeting but no one actually stands. It''s just one of those things that only makes sense in the business world. As the meeting was about to start, a shrill cacaphony began to echo through the building. A voice began blaring over the loudspeakers in the building and informed everyone to calmly proceed to the nearest exit. It looks like the annual fire drill was rescuing us all from the meeting. As we all shuffled into the stairwell, I felt a brief moment of gladness that going down 13 flights of stairs is a whole lot easier than going up. After 20 minutes of shuffling around the parking lot and making small talk with my coworkers, I had mostly exhausted my supply of small talk topics. I''d already discussed the weather, football, and my plans for the weekend (none) with several people. I started to drift over toward the entrance in the hopes of finding out when we would be allowed back into the building. As I approached, I overheard one of the receptionists talking to building security. It seems like they were having some kind of difficulty resetting the fire alarm. After overhearing this I spotted by boss and wandered over to share the news with him. My boss asked me about the current status of my work. Upon hearing that my work was on schedule and that we were not getting back into the building any time soon, he told me that I could leave and work from home if I wanted. Similar to how one usually sits down for a standup meeting, "work from home" doesn''t actually mean working from home. So I was delighted. It was a Friday so I was basically getting an extra long weekend. Since I had some extra time I decided to swing by the used bookstore and grab something to read. Upon arrival I made a beeline for the corner that had the sci-fi, fantasy, and role-playing games. As I was scanning the shelves, I came across an old friend. It was the second edition handbook for a roleplaying game that was popular back when I was a teenager. As I inhaled the familiar scent of dusty old books, I flipped through the pages and was lost in a moment of nostalgia. Back when this book was new, roleplaying games weren''t about the stats or about power-leveling. It was about comraderie, teamwork, and roleplayong. There was very little of the min/maxing, multi-class, bonus feat, over-powered crap that you see today. My nostalgic reverie was interrupted when a folded sheet of paper fell out from between the pages of the book and fluttered to the ground. I bent over and picked it up. Unfolding the paper and flattening it against handbook, I saw that it was a character sheet with nothing filled out for the name, stats, or proficiencies. My vision blurred and I experience a moment of vetigo as the character sheet expanded to fill my vision.
Name:
Stats:
Strength 0 Roll 3d6. Can roll 3 times
Dexterity 0 Roll 3d6. Can roll 3 times
Constitution 0 Roll 3d6. Can roll 3 times
Intelligence 0 Roll 3d6. Can roll 3 times
Wisdom 0 Roll 3d6. Can roll 3 times
Charisma 0 Roll 3d6. Can roll 3 times
Race: Dwarf/Elf/Gnome/Half-Elf/Human/Halfling Pick one
Class: Available classes depend on stats
Proficiencies: Depends on class
Equipment: based on starting class and race
Gold: based on starting class and race
I blinked for a moment trying to clear my vision. The character sheet was the only thing i could see. I turned my head but the character sheet seemed to move with me. It was all I could see no matter where I looked. Fighting down the urge to panic, I took a moment to see what my other senses could tell me. I could no longer hear any of the normal everyday sounds of the bookstore. Everything was eerily quiet. Taking a moment to inhale, I no longer noticed the dusty smell of old books. I sighed. This must be some kind of hallucination. Maybe I over-exerted myself on the stairs this morning and gave myself a stroke or something. There is an old saying, "Exercise won''t kill you". In my mind I silently revised this to: "Exercise will probably kill me". Looking at the character sheet in front of me my panic began to slowly fade as nothing else happened. As I inspected the character sheet, I rembered from my gaming days that I would usually roll my stats first and then fill out the rest depending on what I got for my stats. Looking at the sheet I saw that the first stat was strength. I mumbled to myself, "How do I even roll for strength". The words "roll for strength" seemed to echo and reverberate. Suddenly, there was a sound like dice being shaken and rolled. The number 12 suddenly appeared next to strength. The message saying that I could roll 3 times blinked a few times and then changed to 2. The sheet said that stats are from rolling 3d6. So the minumum should be 3 and the maximum should be 18. A value of 9 should be average for a normal human being but maybe less than average for an adventurer. I though to myself that I should probably roll again. Even though I said nothing out loud it seems like making the decision to reroll was enough. I heard the sound of dice once again. Strength was now a 5.The author''s narrative has been misappropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon. For a moment I forgot that the whole thing was probably a dying hallucination and was suddenly pissed at myself for deciding to reroll. I cleared my throat and hesitantly said, " Um...I''d like to keep the 12". Strength remained a 5. Apparently when I decided to reroll I lost the prior value. So although I was getting 3 rolls, it doesn''t seem like I would automatically get the best of the 3. It looks like I didn''t have much of a choice except to take the 3rd roll for strength and hope for the best. After deciding to take the 3rd roll I heard the dice sounds once again. It turned out that my final roll for strength was a 9. I was kind of annoyed with myself for not keeping the 12. However, it could have been worse. What would happen if I decided to take all 3 rolls and got a 5 on the last roll? I''d be stuck with it. At that moment I decided to only re-roll for values lower than 9. A number of dice rolls later my stats looked like this:
Stats:
Strength 9
Dexterity 11
Constitution 10
Intelligence 18
Wisdom 14
Charisma 8
I lucked out on intelligence. I got an 18 on my very first roll. I ended up rolling 3 times for charisma and my highest roll was an 8 on my third try. It looks like popularity and social skills aren''t my forte even in this bizarre hallucination. I noticed that options had now appeared in the class category. It looks like I could choose between fighter, wizard, priest, and rogue. Looking at my stats, I figured that only a crazy person wouldn''t pick wizard. Even if my stats hadn''t been leaning toward wizard, I thought I''d probably prefer a scholarly life with a lot of books over fighting, stealing, or praying. Now that I had picked a class it looked like some of the options on other parts of the character sheet had changed. The character sheet noted that I could pick one weapon proficiency and 3 non-weapon proficiencies. Perhaps due to my class, there were very few choices for weapom proficiency. My choices were dagger, staff, sling, or light crossbow. I spent about 5 minutes debating the merits of each before I decided on dagger. Sure, everyone pictures a wizard with a staff but no one ever wonders how he makes the gestures for his spells while holding a 2 hand weapon. It''s probably best to just have a weapon that can be unsheathed and sheathed in a hurry. The non-weapon proficiency list was huge. While there were a number of things I would love to choose, the fact that I could only pick 3 meant that I had to settle for essentials. So I picked languages, literacy, and spellcraft. I wondered if my high intellect would let me learn more later. I vaguely recalled something about bonus slots for high intellect. For the race I picked human (male). If the things in this hallucination actually happened, anything else would just be too weird. Glancing at the rest of the character sheet I noticed that the equipment and gold sections now had values. It looks like I had a robe (x2), boots (x2), cloak(x2), belt(x2), dagger, sheath, waterskin (full), bread(x5), spellbook, satchel, backpack, a small quartz crystal, and a coin purse with 138 gold. It looks like the only thing left to fill out was the name. Naming things is hard. I suck at naming things. Since no one else would ever see this, in a moment of whimsy I decided to name myself "Leet Codar". When all is said and done there is nothing more to say or do. So I wondered if I was going to be spending the rest of eternity staring at a character sheet. I didn''t have to wonder for very long. I suddenly experienced something that can only be described as something similar to having your consciousness sucked through a straw. It was awkward, uncomfortable, and I thinked I blacked out for a moment. The next thing I knew was a blade of grass tickling my face and the gentle caress of warm sunlight. It took me a moment to realize that I was feeling the warm embrace of sunlight on my whole body. Apparently I was stark naked. I also seemed to be younger or at least in better shape than I had been a few minutes ago. I wished I had a mirror handy. Quickly glancing around I noticed a pile of supplies next to me. It seemed to be the items from the equipment list on the character sheet. There were some details that one might not have guessed just from looking at the character sheet. Out of the 2 sets of garments one looked of average quality and one looked rather fancy. I''m guessing one was travel clothes and one was for formal occaisions. I quickly put on the travel clothes and stuffed the fancy clothes into the backpack. The dagger and sheath took me a minute to figure out how to properly attach it to the belt. I practiced drawing and sheathing it a few times just to make sure everything was good. There was something that just sort of felt right when everything was the way it should be. I wondered if this was the effect of the weapon proficiency. Thinking about proficiencies I turned my mind to my other proficiencies. I suddenly realized I knew how to read, write, and speak some languages other than English. I was shocked and disoriented for a moment. At this moment I decisively accepted the fact that I was probably dying on the floor of a bookstore somewhere and having the weirdest hallucination. However, until I actually die, I decided to live as if it were real. After all it is not like there was anything else I could do about it. So I decided the next thing to do was split up my gold. I left 20 gold in the coin purse and stashed the rest of it in as many differences as I could think of. A couple coins went into my boots. There were also some places in my cloak, robe, and belt that seemed to be stitched as if they were designed to hide a few coins here and there. Some went into the backpack with my other clothes wrapping them in such as way that they would not clink together. Some went into the satchel where I also placed my spellbook and the quartz crystal. If I encountered thieves, I could toss the coin purse and run. Having taken care of the basic essentials my next priority was to figure out where the hell I was and what to do next. Looking around I saw that I was in a small clearing near the edge of a cliff with the sun hanging directly overhead. Looking beyond the edge of the cliff I could see a walled city on the edge of a large lake in the distance. Or perhaps it wasn an ocean? I couldn''t see the far shore. There did seem to be a decent size harbour with a number of ships. There was a dirt road leading toward the city. If I turned left and left the clearing, it looks like things slope downward. If I go that way I would probably intersect the road at some point. Aside from this I really didn''t see much aside from trees. I also didn''t hear much aside from a gentle breeze rustling through the trees. I shouldered by satchel and slung the backpack onto my back and started walking toward the trees. Fortunately, there was not a lot of underbrush and there was enough distance between them for me to make my way easily. The trees themselves seemed to be mostly deciduous with a few conifers every now and then. I''m not an expert on trees. So I couldn''t tell if they were the same varieties you would expect. I didn''t see anything particularly otherworldly. No trees with giant tentacles or goblins scampering through the underbrush. I uess this isn''t suprising since I was pretty close to a city. I imagine that if there were bandits, monsters, or other dangers they would probably be farther out. Of course cities themselves are full of people and therefore full of trouble. I determined to be cautious when I get to the city. It was about an hour before I reached the road. The road had a number of other travellers, mostly headed toward the city. I saw people travelling with wagons of produce. I saw people like myself travelling on foot and carrying backpacks. I saw horsemen wearing armor. When I say horsemen I mean people on horseback and not some kind of human-horse hybrid. I suppose the clarification is in order since I did see a number of non-humans. I saw dwarfs, elves, and some races that I had no name for. I tried not to stare but watched everyone I could out of the corner of my eye, trying to soak up everything I was seeing without appearing to be rude. A few hours later, the sun looked to be around mid afternoon as I approached a large gate with a raised portcullis. There were guards on both sides who were wearing leather armor and holding pikes. To the left side was a gatehouse with a swordsman wearing chainmail standing outside. I noticed that the shabbier and scruffier looking people were moving to the right. The line to the right was moving rather slowly as it looked like each person had to have a lengthy discussion with a guard before entering. To the left the number of people was much smaller and was almost unimpeded with people typically speaking only a few words with a guard. A small number of people passed through without stopping to talk to anyone. However, these people all seemed to be wearing some kind of livery or would hold up some kind of badge as they passed through. I did a quick self-assessment. Although my clothes were plain, they were made from quality materials. Most of all they looked brand new. While I wasn''t as elegant as some of the people passing on the left, I definitely didn''t look like I belonged in the line on the right. I moved to the left and walked slowly toward the gate, trying to listen to see what the people ahead of me were saying. At this moment I silently thanked myself for picking the language proficiency. I somehow knew that the people on the right were speaking in Common. The people who would talk to the pikemen on the left were speaking Tradespeech. Carriages would stop at the guardhouse and speek to the swordsman in Highspeech. At that moment I knew that I could fluently speak in any of the 3. I wondered if there was some kind of caste system at work here. If so, I guessed it would be odd for someone who could speak Highspeech to identify themselves in some other way. So I walked over to the swordsman. Our conversation wasn''t something that translates to English very well as Highspeech is very flowery and has a lot of nuance. As I arrived in front of him, I was asked, "By your graciousness would you deign to make youself known?" "Today, you have the rare honour of addresssing Wizard Leet of House Codar. As this is my first visit to your fair city, you may inform me where I can find an inn suitable for a person of quality" "If one were to proceed directly ahead to the center of the city, one would find the Inn of the Golden Quill which is immediately adjacent to the wizard''s guildhall. Many wizards find it eminently suitable to refresh themselves from the rigors of travel before presenting themselves at the wizard''s guildhall" I paused for a moment to consider how to say thank you but found no suitable words. It seems like there are no such words unless speaking to one who is socially superior. Apparently, my silence was interpreted as if something was lacking in his reply. "It would be my honour to summon a carriage to take your lordship there" "That will not be necessary." As simply as that I was walking through the gate. I wished I had thought of some way to get him to tell me the name of the city without actually asking, "Where the hell am I?" Guild After passing through the gate there was a large plaza. There were a number of stalls selling various wares and goods. I guess it makes sense to have a market near the gate. Some of the carts and wagons coming in the gate were stopping here to unload supplies. So it looks like a lot of merchants unload and sell their stuff as soon as they are through the gate. I paused to look at some of the items being offered. I wasn''t really looking to buy anything. I was mostly curious about the value of the gold that I had on me. It seems like staple foods and drinks were anywhere between 2 coppers and 8 coppers for enough to feed a person for a day. High quality foods and alcohol were going for a small number of silver. Gold seemed to be for books, weapons, armor, and luxury items. I admit that I was suprised to see a fellow in livery paying out gold for a few small blocks of scented soap. After watching a couple transactions and seeing how much change was returned to the customer, it looks to me like the conversion rate was 10 copper to 1 silver and 10 silver to 1 gold. As I passed a stall selling meat skewers, my stomach rumbled. I had done a lot of walking today and had not had anything to eat or drink. Although I was tempted to stop for food, the sun was beginning to get low in the sky and I still wasn''t sure exactly how much further I had to go to reach the inn mentioned by the guard at the gate. So I pressed onward. After passing through the plaza with the stalls it seemed like I was still in a commercial district as there were a number of shops lining the road. Most of the signs had pictures rather than writing. I think the one with the picture of an anvil was probably a blacksmith. The chalice was probably a tavern. The needle and thread was probably a tailor. I wondered for a moment if literacy was really uncommon here. As I continued walking, I reflected upon the fact that while I didn''t see any evidence of advanced technology, I also didn''t smell anything too unusual. I wondered whether they had some kind of sewer system or people working as street cleaners. Although I had seen a few people in the city on horseback, I hadn''t seen any horse crap in the streets. I guess with this many people living together, they either figure out some kind of sanitation or die of plague long before the city gets this big. The city was much bigger than I expected. It was already starting to get dark by the time I arrived at the courtyard in the center of the city. Looking around I spotted a sign with a golden quill. Based on what I had been told at the gate, the builing next to it should be the Wizards'' Guild. There were a number of other buildings along the outer edge of the courtyard. In the middle of the courtyard was a large fountain. While the fountain was rather majestic looking, it seems that it was also for practical purposes. A number of people were filling waterskins or filling buckets to water their horses. As I pushed open the door to the Golden Quill and stepped inside, I saw the first evidence of actual magic since I arrived in this place. The thing that was immediately obvious was the softly glowing crystals hanging from the ceiling that were lighting up the room. The room had a number of tables, many of which were occupied by partons eating, drinking, and talking. In the corner there was staircase. Next to the staircase was a bar with a portly fellow who rushed over to greet me. "Hello, traveller. How can I be of service?", he asked in Tradespeak. "I''d like food and lodging" What followed was a short session of haggling. He asked for 1 gold and 5 silvers per day. Based on the prices I had seen in the market this seemed like daylight robbery. I glanced around for a moment and then informed him that I was asking about the prices at this inn and not the prices for a palace. However, he was quick to inform me that his inn is a veritable palace. He proceeded to list an impressive list of amenities. The chefs cook food using the finest ingredients and spices. The rooms all have running water. He also mentioned that the serving wenches are available for anything I might need. The last was said with a wink. So I had no trouble understanding what he really meant. It''s a shame that I''m going to end up paying for a service that I''m not going to use...but I''m really not that kind of guy. Eventually we settled on 8 silvers for lodging for the night with dinner included. I think I might have gotten a lower price but my stomach chose to interrupt a couple of times. I also wondered if the lightly lower than average charisma that I had rolled on my character sheet had any kind of impact on pricing. After paying 1 gold I now had 2 silvers in change. Dinner was some kind of salted meat with herbs, bread, and a vegetable soup. The food was pretty good even though I couldn''t identify exactly what the meat and vegetables were. Ale was also provided. I think it was the ale that started to convince me that maybe I wasn''t having some dying hallucination on the floor of the bookstore. The ale would have been pretty good if it had been cold. However, it was warm and therefore an abomination. Even in my worst nightmares I would never imagine drinking warm ale. The meal ended with some kind of unfamiliar berries covered with cream and honey. Thankfully, the berries banished the last taste of warm ale from my mouth. As I finished my meal, one of the serving wenches arrived to show me to my room. It turns out that the room was actually a small suite. It had one room with a bed, another room with an enormous bath tub, and a room with a desk and some chairs. There was also another small room with a bedroll. Light was provided by a small lantern with a glowing crystal inside it. There was also a piece of cloth that could be placed over the lantern to provide darkness. I was trying to find the right words to dismiss the serving wench when she loosened the strings of her blouse to show a generous amout of cleavage. "My name is Anna. Is there anything else I can do for you?", she smiled and asked me. I will not describe how incredibly seductive she looked as I was trying to think about just about anything else at that moment. I''m pretty sure my ears and face were slowly turning red as I said, "No. There is nothing else for now." She smiled at me and said, "Well let me know if you change your mind". Then she went to the small room with the bedroll. So it looked like that would be where she would be spending the night. I dedided it was time to do something I had been curious about since the moment I arrived. I reached in my satchel and took out the spellbook. I took the lantern and my spellbook and went to the room with the desk. Flipping open the cover to the first page I was suprised to find the title page and copyright info for the Handbook that I had been holding in the bookstore. As I flipped through the book I saw that the pages all appeared to be the same. There was a table of contents showing the same topics: introduction, classes, races, stats, equipment, combat, magic, etc... I started flipping through and didn''t notice anything different until I got to the appendix containing the spell lists. The first spell in the list of level 1 spells was "Read Magic". It still had the normal description of the spell but the pages that followed contained the glyphs for memorizing the spell. I flipped through the rest of the level 1 spells and it was the same. I flipped pages until I hit the beginning of the section for second level spells. As I was about to turn the page, knowledge from my spellcraft proficiency suddenly flooded my mind. Looking at spells that are one level higher than what I could actually cast would probably lead to a headache. Looking at spells more than 1 level higher than what I could cast may actually damage my mind. I was actually curious to know if the book actually had all the spells. I''m pretty sure that a 9th level spell is supposed to fill up an entire book all by itself. Even all of the first level spells should have been enough to fill more than 1 book. There definitely seemed to be something odd about the book as it seemed to have more pages than what could physically fit in there. If it did actually have all the spells that were in the Handbook, then it was undoubtedly the most valuable spellbook in existence. The Handbook didn''t contain every known spell in that particlar role playing system. However, it certainly contained more spells than even a grandmaster would know. For that much knowledge to be in a book that could fit in a satchel was positively mind blowing. I felt a moment of sadness that this was a treasure that I could barely use at this point. I flipped back to the beginning of the level 1 spells. I considered which spell I should start with. The knowledge from my spellcraft proficiency chimed in with some knowledge that truely sucked. Everybody starts with Read Magic. Apparently there are 2 parts to being able to cast a spell. The first part is learning the spell. This involves understanding what all the glyphs do and how they all link together in a 3 dimensional spell-form. The second part involves actually sealing a copy of the 3 dimensional spell-form in one''s mind. The difficulty is that 3 dimensional spell models are being represented in 2 dimensions on paper. Read Magic is the only 1st level spell which is actually flat and 2 dimensional. When causes the caster to see the 2 dimensional spell representation as an actual 3 dimentsional model. Read Magic is basically 3D glasses for magic. Once a person has actually learned a spell and knows its form, they are able to construct the 3 dimensional form in their mind by reading the 2 dimensional representation in a spellbook. However, when learning a new spell or one that hasn''t been studied in a long time, one needs Read Magic to see how the spell is actually structured in 3 dimensions. If none of this makes sense to you, then you obviously aren''t a wizard. Just take my word for it.Stolen content warning: this content belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences. After a half hour or so of study, the Read Magic spell was a warmly glowing presence in my mind. I was tempted to try to cast it and take a look at one of the other spells in the book. However, my spellcraft proficiency silently informed me that I would probably not be able to memorize another spell until tomorrow. So even if I "learned" another spell, I wouldn''t be memorizing it until tomorrow. So it could wait until tomorrow morning. In any case, a number of things were becoming clear. As a beginner wizard I would not be solving very many problems with magic. I had better develop the habit of using my wits or using my gold to solve problems. Another thing to keep in mind is that no one can ever see my spellbook. It is quite literally the kind of thing that a wizard would kill for. It is probably a good thing that wizards are naturally very secretive and protective about their spellbooks. No one will think it particularly odd if I keep it with me and allow no one else to look at it closely. I stifled a yawn and glanced at my wrist before realizing that I no longer had a watch or cell phone to tell time. I wasn''t sure what time it was but it was probably time to sleep. Without an alarm I would probably sleep until the crack of noon. That probably wouldn''t be a good idea. I definitely needed to gather information, visit the guild, and do a number of other things tomorrow. So I needed to make sure I get moving pretty early. I grabbed the lantern and my spellbook and walked over to the room where Anna was already asleep. When I saw that she was asleep I was about to turn and leave. However, before I could do so, the light from the lantern woke her up. As she sat up the covers slipped down, revealing that she apparently sleeps nude. At this moment I was reminded of some advice from my grandfather. If you actually catch a peek by accident, no one can blame you. However, if you glance twice you''re a pervert. So make sure the first look is a good long one. I''m pretty sure gramps was a pervert. Most of my friends seem to have gotten much better life advice from their relatives. However, I suppose gramps advice wasn''t wasted. By the time I finished thinking all of this, I had burned this scene into permanent memory. Exerting an iron will I looked only at her face and resisted the temptation of the second glance. "In the morning, wake me up around sunrise if I am not already awake". "Yes, Sir" "Good night, Anna" I returned to the bedroom, tucked the Handbook under my pillow, and threw a cloth over the lantern. A few minutes later I was asleep. When you have been used to waking up in the same place for a number of years, it is a little disorienting to wake up in an unfamiliar bed. It''s even more disorienting when you wake up because an unfamiliar women is pressed up against you and is whispering "wake up" in your ear. It all came back to me in a rush as I recognized Anna and remembered where I was. Anna was now asking me something. It might have been something about breakfast. Only crazy people talk before coffee. I suddenly had a chilling thought. Did coffee exist here? My language proficiency came to my aid. There is definitely a word for coffee. So it should probably exist. I mumbled something about coffee and dragged myself and my backpack off to the bathroom. The bathroom had some towels but I really needed to do something about the basics like shampoo, deodorant, toothpaste, a comb... Oh well, I could survive for one day just washing and rinsing my mouth out with water. Next to the bath was something similar to a modern toilet. It took me a little while to figure out how to work the water to flush the toilet and fill the bathtub. There were 3 sluices. One for the toilet and 2 for the tub. Pulling on a small chain would open the sluice and water would pour out. The only trick was figuring which sluice for the tub was hot and which one was cold. I figured it out by trial and error. Even without coffee, I guess an intelligence stat of 18 might be enough to let me function in the morning. After towelling off, I put on the nicer set of clothes from my backpack. I gave the clothes I had been wearing the sniff test. I could probably still wear them for travelling or heavy work. However, I should probably see about washing them before I wear them for anything else. I rolled them up and put them in the backpack. I was in the bedroom tucking the Handbook back into my satchel when Anna returned with a pot of steaming hot coffee. It turns out I owed her 1 silver for the coffee as breakfast was not included in the room cost. Although coffee exists, it seems like a bit of a luxury item. I gave Anna 2 silver, 1 for the coffee and 1 as a tip. By the time I was finishing my second cup I was wishing I had asked her to get dome food too. I remembered that I had some bread in my backpack. I found and unwrapped the bread. It was 5 small loaves of what seemed to be wheat bread. The loaves were pretty small. So it seemed like almost the right amount for breakfast for 2 people. I shared 2 with Anna and selected 2 for myself. The final piece got re-wrapped and put back in my backpack. As we were eating I asked Anna some basic questions about the city. This is how I found out that the city was called Parthenalia. The body of water to the north of the city was a very large freshwater lake name Lake Parthan. I asked whether the city was named after the lake or the lake was named after the city. It turned out that the answer was neither. The city lord was named Justen Parthan. The city and the lake were named after the lord''s family name. From the way she explained it, the city has a complicated relationship between the lord and the guilds. There is a guild for just about every kind of profession. The lord taxes the guilds to pay for soldiers and public works. However, the guilds have a lot of power since they are the ones who pay for everything. The wizards guild is the powerhouse amoung the guilds. This is because magic is expensive and generates a lot of wealth. However, it is also because a lot of the wizards are nobility since magic requires a lot of funds and education to learn. The laws of the city provide a number of protections and privileges for nobility. Guild members also have a number of rights. Citizens who are not guild members have very few rights and are only allowed to work in the small number of fields that have no established guild. At the bottom level of society were slaves. Slaves had no rights or legal protections. It seems like debt slavery was a thing here. A person who could not honor a contracted debt could be sold into slavery to pay the debt. It seems that in any world, the poor are totally screwed by the powers that be. Anna herself fell into the group of citizens who are not guild members. Apparently there was no guild for serving wenches. If we were to step outside the inn we would see the Guild Halls for each of the guilds. There was also a building for Guildsmeet. The Guild Halls are for the members of their respective guilds. The Guildsmeet sounded to me live a cross between an adventurer''s guild and a chamber of commerce. People could take their requests there and they would be matched to qualified guild members for service. I sent Anna to return the now empty coffee pot to the kitchen. While she was gone I decided to put the time to good use. I took the Handbook over to the desk. I flipped to the section with the level 1 spells. Although I wouldn''t be solving very many problems with magic since I currently could only retain 1 spell in memory, it was still a good idea to prepare a useful spell. I decided to pick the most versatile spell I could. After thinking for a moment, I decided to learn "Create Light". One one hand, Create Light was useful for providing illlumination. It could also be used to generate a bright flash of light. So it could be used to temporarily blind someone in combat. I might also be able to make some quick money by casting it on an object and selling it to someone who wants magical light. The light wouldn''t last forever. However, my understanding from my spellcraft proficiency was that it could last for an impressive amount of time if one didn''t make it too bright. The read magic spell required a small piece of quartz or some other mostly clear crystal. Fortunately, I had a piece of quartz in my satchel. As I held the piece of quartz over the fist page of the Create Light spell, I closed my eyes and found the softly glowing Read Magic spell in my mind. I gently "pulled" this to the front of my mind. As the spell came to the front of my mind, harsh grating noises began to spill from my mouth. The sounds were impossible to hold onto. They didn''t sound like anything that could come from a human throat. As the words spilled out it seems like reality twisted in some indescribable way. A gentle illumination came from the crystal. The glyphs on the page seemed to riple and stretch until there was a 3 dimensional spell structure floating above the page. I knew that the effect of the spell would last as long as I was holding the crystal over the book. I rested my elbow on the table so that my arm wouldn''t become tired. As I turned to the next page, more glyphs rose up and became part of the spell model. When I turned to the last page of the spell the model became complete. Now that I could see the full model of the spell, it wasn''t hard to understand the spell. Before I found myself in this world, I did a lot of work with computer programming. I was used to working with large, complex, abstractions in my head. So it didn''t take me hard to see how all the parts connected and worked. Memorizing the spell was harder. I''m not really used to storing arcane energies in my mind. However, a little less than an hour later and I had it. As I closed the book I wondered what happened to Anna. I turned around to find her standing there quiety. "Oh. You''re back. Why didn''t you say anything?" "Only people who are tired of living would interrupt a wizard at work" I thought there was probably some sense to this. My spellcraft proficiency seemed to suggest that the most likely result of interrupting a wizard spellcasting is that the spell fizzles out. There is a low chance of some misfire or unintended consequence. Interrupting a wizard who is memorizing spells is unlikely to have any unintended magical effect, but is probably a good way to piss off a wizard. Pissing off a wizard could have some serious and intended magical consequences. I stuffed the Handbook and the quartz into my satchel. I decided to take my coin purse and satchel with me and leave the rest of my stuff in the room. I would pay to extend the length of my stay on the way out. I asked Anna if it was safe to leave things in the room while I was away. She told me that theft is rare since the penalty is usually slavery or execution. That seemed kind of harsh to me but I bet that it really works as a deterrent. She told me that if I was worried that I could pay her to watch my stuff while I was gone. I ended up agreeing to pay her 1 silver to spend the day watching my stuff and running any errands I might need later in the day. I also resolved to spend some time researching the laws here. If the penalty for petty theft is death or slavery, I probably don''t want to accidentally break any laws here. It was time to go to the Wizard''s Guild Hall.