《Resetting Lady》


 Chapter 1: A 17-year-old girl

    Chapter 1: A 17-year-old girl


    <b> 00. A 17-year-old girl</b>


    The beginning was always the same.


    The gray sky, the drizzling rain, the muddy, barren garden. The chill in the air, the mud-stained nightgown. The gash on her throat that stung. If she didnt go back to the mansion soon, the gardener would find her. She kicked the rope near her feet and headed to the passage used by maidsshe failed again this time. Its cold. This time, once again. She gritted her teeth. What went wrong this time.


    Unlike the damp hallway, the room inside was warm. The temperature was better due to the thick fur quilts that blocked out the cold and the fire that burned in the firece.


    She took off her dirty clothes and threw them into the firece, at which, the fire died because her clothes were wet.


    Cursing to herself as she turned on themp at the foot of her bed, she poured oil into the firece so that the fire would burn once more. She stared at the woman in the mirror. She failed again this time.


    She sat on a wooden chair, and on the table was a piece of paper and a small tub of ink. After staring at those for a long time, she grabbed a pen. Dipping it into the inkwell, she wrote on the piece of paper.


    117. My name is


    She lost her grip over the pen and stopped writing. Whats the point? Even her name was meaningless. She felt empty. This time, this time! She thought the same thing for ten years. For the next thirty years, she tried to adapt. The next twenty years, she only thought about how she could make herself die. Then, the next five years were spent doing nothing. And And.


    Carynne Hare.


    She fell into a book.


    And for 117 years, she couldnt get out.


    * * *


    The book she transmigrated into was a typical romance novel. Carynne, the daughter of a minor fief lord, was to be wed to her rtive, Dun Roid, so that her family could keep the territory. But just like any other female protagonist, Carynne was a girl who dreamed of true love, and so she broke off her engagement.


    She couldnt possibly love a smelly, skinny, hateful-looking man. After that, Carynnes family fell into ruin, so she started working as ady-in-waiting for a young noblewoman, and there, she fell in love with Raymond, the fianc of the young noblewoman. Following many trials and adversities, Carynne and Raymond got married.


    The novels timeline was roughly over a year, and she also seeded in marrying Raymond by using the same method. Happy ending. Happy ending.


    After this chapter ended, Carynne was murdered the very next page. It was through poison. After copsing because of the burning pain, she woke up at dawn, in the middle of the garden. She had trembled with fear.


    Then, she fell in love with Raymond once again. She fell asleep in his embrace. Yet, when she opened her eyes, she was back in the same garden. This was the second time she died, and she didnt even know why.


    The third loop was spent staying away from Raymond, who then married another woman, and Carynne apuded as she attended the wedding as a guest. After the ceremony, she died after being trampled by a horse during the wedding procession. Her whole body was mangled.


    The same was true after this round. The reason was different every time, but the end was always the sameher death.


    Just in case it would work, she pushed through with her engagement a few years ago. Her engagement with Dun hadnt been broken, and she had wedded him without any problems. But when she woke up once more, she was back in the same garden. She didnt know which it was that sent her back, whether it was when she had died or whether it was when a year had passed.


    It wasnt until a considerate amount of time that she figured out the mechanics of the loop.


    1. The duration is one year. It always starts in the garden while its raining.


    2. After one year, Carynne dies for whatever reason and will return to the same time and ce.


    3. She would start anew while bringing back with her the things in her hands that she was holding as she died.


    Thanks to the thirdw, she was able to have faith that she wasn''t dreaming. The number 116 was engraved onto the t gold coin in her hand. After changing the number 6 to 7, she looked up at the ceiling. She couldnt even remember her original face anymore.


    She had lived as Carynne for more than a century. As her mind grew more than twice as old as her body, she had lost any hope of being able to leave this novel.


    Id rather die, really.


    Youre not supposed to say that, Mdy. I cant imagine a world without you here.


    Nancy, a dark-skinned maid, berated Carynne lightly as she brushed her hair. She could still remember a time where the worlds most important Missus was a woman who had the same dark skin. It was more than a hundred years ago. It was too vague of a memory to even call it a memory.


    Whenever she saw this maid who was closest to her, Carynne would be reminded again that she wasnt from this world. When she saw for the first time how the maid bowed towards her, Carynne shuddered in reluctance.


    But then again, if this maid did not keep her head down as she left the room, she would be punished and beaten. This was how colored people were treated here, even the elderly. She had witnessed it for 117 years. Only time could change such values of humanity.


    Does Mdy not like Lord Dun to that extent?


    Theres no way she would like him. All the people here were like ink on paper to her. It was all meaningless, fleeting, and yet ink inherently <i>wasnt</i> harmless. Anyone could die if they drank ink. Should she say that the ink was poison? Whats left would be but an ephemeral moment of joy. It was a short pleasure spanning for even less than a page.


    She chuckled inwardly. As disfigured as Dun looked, he was worse in bed. Thest time she slept with him was a few years ago. And he had always been a stuttering, clumsy, ugly young man whocked vigor.


    Hes ugly.


    Oh my goodness.


    If we swap his lower parts with your lovers, Ill consider him again.


    Where did Mdy hear such words? Which maid said that?


    Dont be so uptight. Its just a harmless joke from a 17-year-old girl who doesnt even know what a mans genitals look like.


    Ive been taking care of you since you were a baby, but what are you talking about now? I didnt raise you like this In any case, after ten years of marriage, something like this would be nothing.


    Thats not it.


    Do you think it wouldst ten years with Dun?


    Then will it end after only a year? Youll have more time. Lets hurry up and tighten your corset first. You should see if you can have at it with a better man than Dun with a thin waist.


    Mmh!


    If it werent for this bloody corset, she could have had more fun. The whalebone corset, which squeezed her dry even of her swearwords, would more likely chew and bite at her waist than to just make it thin. It was suffocating. She hated this era.


    Nancy, Ie from a time period where voluptuous women are popr.


    If you live in that time period, then youd be the slimmest of them all, what with you being such a picky eater.


    No, Nancy. Truthfully, she was quite the glutton.


    Greasy meat, sweet snacks, all the kinds of food that would melt in her mouth. She liked all of these things, but the food in this world didnt suit her pte. The bread was too hard and the meat smelled and tasted fishy. Salt was so expensive that she could only eat salty food once a week before she married Raymond.


    That was the biggest reason why she liked Raymond. He provided her with good food. He was a man who could give both good food and good sex. Carynne swallowed the words that she couldnt utter.


    Are you not going to attend the worship service today as well?


    Ill listen to such prayers five times a day after I get married anyway, so whats the point?


    Dun was a priest. Along with the local parish, he would also receive thend of the Hare family. As she thought of Dun, who recited the name of God from their first night as a wedded couple and for all the days toe, Carynne felt like throwing up.


    How s. Ive been with Mdy since you were young, but youre a little different today. Everyone says its like this before getting married, but youll be fine.


    <i>No, Im not fine, Nancy.</i>


    She had not been fine for 117 years.


    * * *


    It was a youngdys 17th birthday, but they were far from the capital, so it wasnt a grand event. All the more so for Carynne, whose marriage was already halfway confirmed.


    The roads surrounding the fief werent in good condition either, and the nearest estate to the fiefdom was at a distance that would take one entire day of a carriage ride. And so, the hall was inevitably quiet.


    Rtives and people who were connected to the fief in terms of business, who only vaguely exchanged letters with the family, wandered into the hall. And the clumsy musicians, who were forced to y for this event, were out of sync. They all had the expression I want to get this over with and just get paid already stamped across their faces.


    Even in such a ce, Carynne was the center of attention. It wasnt just because she was the star of this event, but because her beauty made her shine.


    Her red hair, which was skillfully styled by Nancy, was naturally wavy, and the tight corset she was wearing emphasized both her bust and the thin waist that it was around.


    Even though she was only seventeen years old, she was breathtakingly alluring. Those who killed time while prattling on with perfunctory conversation would grow lively when conversing with her.


    Carynne could tell what they were thinking even if they wouldnt say it aloud. She was a woman who was in a tentative engagement, so they couldnt approach her openly.


    But the moment Carynne would say, I dont want to get married like this, they would cry out with joy. They would be so excited to rip her clothes and pounce on her.


    She spent about seven years rolling around the sheets with men, but she got tired of that faster than she thought she would. Most of them smelled horrible and didnt even manage their pubic hair properly, so the experience was quite revolting.


    This time, Carynne was set on doing something. She was toozy to marry Raymond, toozy to spend time taking care of the fiefdom. Shes already read almost all the books she could get her hands on, and the food here wasnt delicious at all.


    C-Carynne Hare. Y-Your h-husband hase to you, yet y-you make that face?


    Not yet.


    F-Fianc.


    Either way, not yet.


    Dun, Carynnes fianc.


    It was strange how he wore his ck priests robe while attending his fiances birthday banquet. She was already used to it, but her brows would still furrow at the unpleasant sight of him being unbearably self-conscious. What she couldnt stand wasnt really how whispers followed them while they were together, but rather his attitude of being so conscious of the eyes on him.


    It was embarrassing. He arrived a while ago, yet he didnt even change his clothes. What he wore right now didnt match the asion, and there were mud stains clinging onto the edges of his pants.


    He smelled disgustingly of medicine, wine and acrid rain. His wide eyes looked like a dead fishs, and the ck shadows underneath them made it so that children would cry at just the sight of him. Even maids would sometimes get surprised after seeing him. And those eyes were looking at Carynne right now.


    Of course, Carynne had gotten used to them for over a hundred years, so she wasnt particrly affected by that ghastly gaze.


    W-What are you thinking about?


    Nothing much.


    He was very tall, but he was skinny, had no money, and didnt know how to use his d*ck. He was a man who didnt love Carynne and instead lusted for her. Apart from that, he was arrogant and rude.


    Carynne loathed him, yet at the same time, she hated herself for feeling so strongly towards mere ink on paper.


    If he was even the least bit attractive, none of the conflict in the novel would have happened!


    It was aughable thought. Just what the hell was this man. She had tried getting married to him, but that didnt work. When she returned after spending a year with Dun, her frustration had reached its peak.


    Everything was meaningless. She had livedpassionately back then, like a nun, but it was all for nothing.


    Life is meaningless.


    B-But After getting m-married


    All women who are about to get married feel the same way and the same frustration, but most of these concerns disappear after you get married. Stop thinking youre some sort of fairytale princess, Lady Hare, is what you were about to say, right?


    S-Simr.


    Yes, it was exactly the sameshe wanted to reply like this, but sheined inwardly instead. What he said to her several times back then while stuttering was Youll marry me anyway, so wake up.


    Its not like that.


    If only herints were only that much.


    She just wanted to grow old. Or die. No she just didnt want to be in this ce anymore. She was tired of it all. The same conversations, the same responses even after 100 times! Even the stuttering.


    Swallowing a desperate scream, Carynne mimicked a 17-year-old girl who was moderately pouty. As he admired her beauty a little, the 25-year-old Dun stopped being sarcastic. Dun thought that Carynne was being immature, and he was right.


    About a century ago. Maybe even now. Carynne was already 117 years old, but there was no one who treated her as such, so she didnt find the need to act ording to her age either.


    Carynne, the redheaded beauty with purple eyes who lived forever.


    The orchestra began ying.


    <i>t/n: </i><i> </i><i>hello there~ im yonnee, the trantor for this series. just want to say how much i absolutely </i>adore <i>this novel because its so different from the usual shoujo/josei transmigration and regression novels out there, and all the blood and murder in this one is really up my alley~</i>


    <i>resettingdy is officially tagged as R15 on kakaopage, but ive read somements and reviews online saying that it may as well have been tagged as R19 because of the heavy subject matters it deals with. nothing too explicit, but it could get too roughter on, so consider yourself warned! </i>


    <i>i hope you enjoy reading about carynnes journey as much as i do!</i>


    <i>side note: our protagonists name is canonically carron (based on an arc/chapter title in the novel) or karen (based on the second cover byphet on kkp) but i personally like the look of carynne on the page more, so i went with that.</i>

 Chapter 2

    Chapter 2


    With a pout still on her lips, Carynne held Duns hand. This was a normal start. Dun had two left feet, but since Carynne didnt want to repeat falling over because of him, she gripped Duns hand and skillfully took the lead. It might not be urate, but perhaps this was the neenth time she had danced with Dun. Right then, she held his waist and did a turn with him.


    Who would kill her this time?


    Her death had somehow be the most interesting and exciting event that she looked forward to. Carynne even directed her own death to some extent. Repeated deaths and mixed memories would confuse anyonefrom minor inconveniences such as trying to remember if she had this conversation before, or something major such as being killed and might lead to resentment.


    No matter how true it was that she would still survive in the end and go back in time, she still died before starting over. Even so, she was sick and tired of this repeated humdrum life with the same boring conversations. Carynne wanted to see new reactions as much as possible, and this secluded region where there was no war, nothing ever happened.


    <i>Anythings good, so just do something to make meugh.</i>


    What should she do this time?


    It was her 17th birthday, and at the same time, it was her 117th.


    She would need to wait a month before she could meet Raymond. This period where nothing important happened was only described in a few short paragraphs, and she was already so tired of it. All that mattered in these scenes was to highlight how unattractive and rude Dun was, and at the same time, how much he was unworthy of marrying the beautiful, witty and precious Carynne.


    The song was over.


    I w-wont ask you to l-love me, Carynne Hare. Were rtives But if we dont get m-married, thend would be r-revoked by the state So to prevent that marriage w-within the family is necessary


    You dont have to exin it to me so diligently. Its something both you and I know.


    Then at least s-smile. Everyone in this mansion is lughing at me.


    His grip tightened over Carynnes wrist. <i>Youre clutching it too much, moron.</i> She felt that she was going to get a bruise. Karen hated pain. She had gone through a lot of things, but she hated pain so muchto the point that she even wanted to postpone her death. Tempering the iing irritation she could already feel, Carynne ced her other hand over Duns chest.


    Its not like that, Dun.


    I cant s-stand being treated like a f-fool.


    This grumbling man wasughable. Even the word cute didnt suit him. His pride soared high, yet his self-confidence was rock bottom. Carynne had seen this a lot, the narrow-mindedness of this young man who wouldnt change even if he married Carynne. This was his nature.


    It might be because he wasnt Carynnes male lead in the novel she read, but perhaps he would be more mature decadester after bing a father and raising a child.


    However, Carynne knew very well that the young man in front of her suffered from a severe inferiorityplex, and it was a waste of time to hope that he would change. He would never grow out of it. As far as Carynne had witnessed, he didnt have the capacity to change.


    Carynne recalled a time when she thought that her hasty marriage with her original fianc, Dun Roid, was the key to breaking the time loop. She was young back then. Wait, no? Maybe not. She didnt even know how long it had been.


    Having lived as a teenager for more than a hundred years, her mind was like a jumbled bookshelf with all its books haphazardly shoved in.


    Even if Carynne whispered sweet nothings into his ear, he would doubt her. It was quite refreshing at first, when she targeted Dun instead of Raymond, who was the stutterersplete opposite. Raymond was someone who would approach Carynne first and would swear his unconditional dedication and love for her, even if it wasnt reciprocated.


    How should she go about it then? Carynne contemted on how she should live this life. There was this one book that she hadnt finished reading yet, but she read it back in Raymonds mansion. At this point, it hadn''t even been published yet. She should finish reading that book. However, it was still a long way off until her first meeting with Raymond.


    The highlight of this part of the novel was how she would break it off with Dun. Up her arsenal, Carynne knew more than 30 ways to humiliate him. If she let this pass and wouldnt do anything, she would get married to him. But that wouldnt be fun since she already did that before.


    What hadnt she done so far?


    Since it wasnt time for the inciting incident yet, Carynne spent most of this time in a rxed manner. Its still cold at this time of the year, so it would be difficult to go to the garden. It wasnt time for exciting, fun people toe, and there was only her maid, the other servants and her ugly fianc around her at this moment.


    In the beginning, she always felt depressed. But after going through this a hundred years after she turned 17 years old, perhaps it was time for a celebration. Amemoration of sorts. She wanted to do something different.


    Come to my room tonight.


    Now that she thought about it, she had yet to y with Dun today. Nothing significant would happen any time soon anyway.


    After bing tired and prickly because of the long trip, this was a disappointing time for Dun. And for Dun, who was even uglier nowpared to when he was younger, this was truly amentable time. In this iteration, perhaps she should tie him up and hit him with a whip.


    However, after hearing Carynnes words, Dun frowned. His anger was incited, and he tried to swear at her and call her an obscene woman. But rather than that, what he said to Carynne, whose chest was pounding, was quite unexpected.


    Will you lock the door and go on all fours like a dog?


    Oh my?


    Begging, you did that during your t-tenth birthday.


    There was such a backstory? She felt better now because of the refreshing new response. She didnt know that Carynne had such a past. There were cases when a couple wouldnt even talk once theyd gotten married, but he was being like this. Very good. This gave her a little pleasure. Carynneughed sincerely this time because she was truly delighted.


    Then lets go after this dance.


    Why?


    What do you mean, why? Lets have our wedding a little early.


    I dont follow.


    She pinched his chest over his clothes, and what followed was a weak groan.


    Even if there wasnt love between them, lust could exist. She knew him well.


    Do you hate a wife whos like this?


    Of course not.


    Chuckling, she rearranged the skirt of her dress to cover his lower body. Its only right for ady to do so.


    * * *


    Why was it that sex and death seemed to be irrevocably connected? After shuddering in fear at first, she gradually got used to sleeping with someone. The feeling of <i>that </i>inside her was quite nice, and the illusion that warmth enveloped her when a body would embrace her was also quite nice. During even the most intense moment of her life, even for just a moment, it couldfort her and give her the sense that there was nothing depressing about it at all.


    After experiencing death more than once before, she found the experience to be kind of the same. She would be pushed to the highest point, as though she had ascended to the heavens, yet at the same time, it felt like she was stuck on the ground.


    Of course, she had slept with men who couldnt deliver even a fraction of this feeling and did only meaningless movements, as if rowing a boat in the air. Dun wasnt any better.


    Unlike Carynne, who was bright and beautiful, he was skinny and pale, and he had a gloomy personality. At the same time, he had a knack for getting offended by the most trivial things that Carynne would say.


    He had a nasty habit of looking down on people, but at the same time, he was the object of their ridicule. He couldnt manage the territory well, so he mostly relied on Carynnes father. With his posture eternally poor, his shoulders were hunched and his back was bent forward.


    As she went back in time again and again over a fixed period of time, perhaps she thought that this was part of his charm. It was only after many years that she found him to be cute. By that time though, almost everyone had be simr in her eyes.


    After bing mentally older than Dun, his gloominess and his prickliness caught her eye, and she wondered just what kind of the environment he grew up in for him to turn out like this. Now, hed be bearable enough that she saw him as cute in his own way.


    Does it h-hurt?


    He didnt seem to be worried about her even though he asked this. Rather, he would enjoy it more if she was in pain. Duns movements became noticeably intense the moment he saw Carynnes blood, and at this, she resisted the urge to snort.


    Its ridiculous. Unpopr men were sad about not being popr with women, but they didnt want to admit it. The more such a man felt this way, the more obsessed he would be about a womans virginity. This kind of man wouldnt want his ipetence to be revealed.


    Carynne wondered if Dun was a virgin. Although he just returned from studying at a monastery, she knew well enough that it was still a ce where a person could pop the cherry. Moreover, it wasnt like Dun was a dutiful priest. Unlike Raymond.


    Would Dunpare her to someone else? Carynne recalled her first time. It was such a long time ago. Was it Raymond? But this train of thought was cut off because of a noise from outside. Servants could be heard passing by beyond the door. They must be looking for her. The banquet wasnt over yet after all.


    Carynne wondered what would happen if she was caught in the act. Although they were already engaged, most people were still dubious about Dun. Should she make it so that shes seen in this bedroom with him?


    She wanted to see an attendant admire Carynne like this, then copse into shock. At this point, she looked up at the person over her. She also wanted to see Dun flustered.


    Carynne hated his arbitrary caresses and ineffective teasing, but she liked it when he embraced her so tightly as though he didnt want to let go of herwhen he would groan and show a desperate look.


    Because of this, their movements were restricted, the sensation wasnt much, and the friction down below was nothing short of a dragonflys fluttering wings. Even if the purpose of sleeping with him was to be embraced, Carynne was left speechless.


    She considered it for a while, if this was enough to make her angry. But it wasnt, so she didnt act on it. This was stimting in its own way. Its also something that didnt happen in a previous loop.


    From the very first day of this loop, she rolled around the sheets with Dun. She went to bed with him right away before the wedding. A while ago, he stuttered tremendously and beseeched God. Considering how he was right now, it was clear that hes perverted.


    Perhapster, it would be nice to do some wax y. Dun didnt know if Carynne was just shocked or something because she was so quiet, but he fumbled and tried to make excuses for himself.


    Y-Youre the one who s-seduced me.


    Was he trying to say that she took advantage of him? All she was thinking right now was how she disliked that her underwear got dirty. The banquet wasnt over yet. Should she wash up again?


    Her body, which was briefly heated up because of lust, quickly cooled down when her desire was extinguished. As Carynne stared at the anxious Dun, she frowned when she caught his stench.


    He didnt even wash his hair after getting drenched by the rain. Perhaps he had lost his strength, but he was easily pushed away by Carynne when he had pulled out of her.


    Wash up. You smell horrible.


    Huh? H-Horrible?

 Chapter 3

    Chapter 3


    <i>What should I do this time?</i>


    Carynne was lying on the bed, staring nkly into the air.


    She had already tried giving all her wealth to the territorys residents, read books, enjoyed a resplendent life with menoh, but she was stabbed to death back then. She also already watched Raymond and Ise get married while she herself married Dun without any qualms.


    However, most of the ces she went to over the years were restricted to the Hare territory, Ises vi and Raymonds mansion. And even Raymond''s mansion was a ce where she only stayed at for a short period of time because by then, the novel was already about to end. Even over a hundred years, the time she spent leisurely lying in afortable bed wasnt long at all.


    There were so few ces where women of this era could go, so its boring. Carynne briefly thought of wheedling Ise into travelling far away with her this time, but she threw away the idea.


    Two women on a trip. Five servants would be the minimum, and its obvious that the adult men who would escort them would be Raymond and Dun. This was concerning. Who would be responsible for whom?


    Carynne roughly arranged the flushed Duns clothes, then she spoke.


    Escort me properly.


    They had to dance three more songs. Then, he was going to trip over a servants foot, get angry at him, pour wine over his head, thenugh at him. And she was going to be shocked by his violence.


    Uh.


    Put some strength in your legs.


    Rather, Carynne was the one who escorted him since his legs were still like jelly, and she helped him as she clicked her tongue. Then, Dun tripped over the servants foot as scheduled, fell down, got angry at the servant, but he couldnt pour wine over his head.


    * * *


    What are you doing, Mdy?


    Nothing, just worrying about my future.


    Nancy sighed as she watched Carynne, who couldnt focus on the breakfastid before her. Nancy hated how Carynne would get so lost in thought.


    Dont think about it much. Isnt that just a waste of time? Everything will be fine over time, so you should just enjoy it. Hm?


    Its been about one hundred years and its still not fine.


    Sure


    Whats in your hand?


    This?


    Carynne hid the coin that she was fiddling with, but then again, she didnt have to hide it so she took it out again. After all, only Carynne knew the meaning behind it. Its worth nothing to others.


    Its just something I carry around. Something like an amulet.


    If its tooplicated to have, then just throw the coin away. Isnt it the same with thoughts that you mull over for a long time? Now, finish worrying and eat. But we have to tighten your corset again, so dont eat too much.


    Its fine, perhaps? Carynne grabbed the coin. They had only been together, oh, 117 years. Its difficult to decide on what to do this time, so it might not be bad to decide like this. If the numberes face up, Carynne would just roll around with Dun this time. Should she study theology?


    If it would turn up the other way Nancy snatched the coin and flipped it.


    Now, the rear is turned up. Go ahead and eat.


    Then, she would have to do something bad this time around.


    As Carynne decided to go on the crooked path in this life, she dreamed of a grand ambition while watching the teacup be filled with hot water.


    Carynne was going crazy because she was so bored of living. After dozens of attempts, when she was still convinced that marrying Raymond was the answer, she tried various methods. Doing good deeds was one thing she tried. She sold her assets and did fundraising campaigns.


    Nevertheless, the results were the same. No, they werent even any better. She was also once killed by a homeless man she helped back then.


    However, good deeds were quite addictive. She eventually gave up in the end because it wasnt the answer, but for a while, Carynne thought that helping others might make her happy. She didnt sleep, she wandered around, and it was just as rewarding as it was futile.


    If good deeds were fun, then evil deeds would definitely be fun as well.


    She wanted to do something incredibly bad for it to be considered evil. What would be ideal? Carynneughed as she imagined herself conquering the world. However, considering the ces she could go and the money she could spend, she had to give up this ambition.


    She would need about twenty servants, but they listened more to her fathers orders. They werent loyal to Carynne enough tomit murder for her. And she would have to put a lot of effort in making someone else move.


    Carynne clicked her tongue just thinking about the countless maids, servants and knights in the story, who were used to giving up their lives even if they did nothing wrong.


    Her deadline was only a year. In the end, even if she tried to cause trouble, the biggest thing she could do was infidelity, and the smallest thing was to bully the servants. Theyre both trivial.


    She wanted to do somethingrge-scale. She had tried tomit arson before, but the gardeners were quick to put the fire out. Thanks to this, several of her attempts at arsonwith the intent to take her own lifehad always failed.


    It was no use hurting herself. Until the day she reached thest chapter of the book, she wouldnt die. There was a time when she threw herself down a flight of stairs, and that got her whole body paralyzed. Albeit the bedsores, she felt relieved when she died while lying down without saying a word.


    Thinking about that time, she felt a sour taste in her mouth. Theres no one whod willingly take care of someone whos in a vegetative state with a pure heart. When she opened her eyes again the following year, she thought shed take revenge on the people who killed her, but she gave up on the idea because even that was meaningless.


    There was no justification in punishing the people who didnt do it at that timeline, and even if she tried to take revenge, there would be too many targets. Nancy alone had once twisted her neck.


    But right then, Carynne stopped at that train of thought.


    Revenge? Revenge, revenge.


    Ah.


    For a while now, she thought that she had already done everything that she could. That supposition was wrong. There were countless options that she had yet to consider, just as she hadnt done that with Dun on the very first day.


    While praising the uncertainty of life, she wondered why she never attempted to exact revenge. Perhaps she thought that it was love that changed people and the world.


    At first, she did what she had read in the book, met someone else, rinse and repeat. The requisite was to love. She wandered in search of love for one hundred years. They were boring days, meaningless days.


    Love was not the answer.


    She was sick and tired of putting up with such bothersome characters.


    Its time for revenge.


    Uninteresting characters, characters who were not the answer to her plightthey must receive the readers revenge.


    Ah!


    Something she had never done before!


    Carynne came up with something new to do. And at that, she was engulfed in joy.


    Why hadnt she thought of this before?


    It wasnt love that had the greatest influence on people.


    It was death.


    As she weed her 117th birthday, Carynne Hare decided to be a murderer.


    * * *


    The new n gave Carynne a boost of zeal.


    She was so excited that she couldnt understand why she hadnt decided to kill before. Why should she run first when she had been on the receiving end of death for a century? She had always been struck first.


    But as she reflected on the task, it wasnt going to be easy.


    Even so, Im happy about that. They say that hardships make people shine brighter.


    Her slender arms might not even be enough to twist the neck of a chicken. She had never lifted anything heavier than a book. When going to church, she always rode a carriage. And when she had to climb a lot of steps, servants were there to assist her.


    The deadline was one year. If she used that time only to build muscle, she would end up doing nothing.


    If she started with a baby, then that would be easy. However, there was no infant in the mansion. Pregnant maids werent allowed to continue working, so there werent any young children in here. The youngest one in the mansion was the gardeners child, but that kids already much stronger than Carynne.


    The library in the mansion was expansive, but none of those books would help hermit murder. And thest murder that happened in this area had been in a small vige, which happened before Carynne was even born.


    In the end, Carynne felt discouraged for a while because she realized that killing someone with her own hands would be difficult. But soon enough, she started enjoying the predicament.


    There were endless ways. The number of deaths she suffered through already reached three digits. She was the textbook. She was the living witness. The answer was her.


    Carynne was afraid of nothing else but boredom. As a woman who lived forever, even if she would get caught, all she needed to do was start again. She had seen through all kinds of habits and past preferences as she had lived with them for a horribly long time.


    She had plenty of opportunities. Who should she go with first? Carynne contemted with a pounding heart.

 Chapter 4

    Chapter 4


    The first person she thought of was Ise. As Raymonds fiance, she was Carynnes rival, and she recalled the times Ise tried to humiliate her in the past.


    Worried about losing Raymond, Ise tormented Carynne a lot. And Ise actually had many weak points. Above all, she would be a rtively easy victim since Carynne could get close to her as her maidter.


    But Ill get caught anyway.


    Apart from being her rival in love, Carynne was also Ises maid. Who else would be the prime suspect if not her? Itd be better if she could hold out for a long time without getting caught.


    She wasnt afraid of the death penalty. If she would die, she could just start over again. And if she really did die withouting back? Thats what she wanted in the end.


    However, if she was going to fail at the very beginning, her excitement would fizzle out. She wanted to kill as many people as possible and make it all the more fun.


    She had been through all sorts of hardships in those repetitions, but if she could pull this off, shed be overwhelmed with so much pride.


    She thought of the easiest person to kill. Perhaps Raymond would be the most challenging one. Raymond was a man who was bestowed the title of Sir after all.


    Carynne had once seen him deal with six strong young men easily. However, if he was infatuated with Carynne, he might just be willing to drink whatever it was that shed give him.


    With this train of thought, she lost a bit of her steam.


    She truly wanted to enjoy herself for a long time. Perhaps during a horseback riding date in the middle of summer, she could lead him to a secluded ce and push him off his horse. If shes lucky, hed break his neck.


    Carynne knew Raymond well.


    No, she knew all the characters well.


    Thats why her own weak body could contribute more fun to this challenge. Carynne clenched her hand into a fist as she thought this, but she unclenched it again with a smile as she ced an essory on her hair.


    Shell save Raymond forter. Before meeting Raymond, Carynne would have to meet his current fiance, Ise Evans.


    She had the name Carynne Hare. And if Carynne was in any danger, Raymond would be there for her. As it had been thus far, this was the natural plot developmentit was such a clichd love story.


    But this time, it would be a little different. Carynne looked into the mirror with a pounding heart. With her cheeks flushed and her eyes sparkling with anticipation, the reflection looking back at her seemed like a girl madly in love.


    After so many decades, she was finally embarking on a new adventure. Carynne recalled the day she first met Raymond over a century ago.


    A girls dream.


    A knight whose hair was a luscious golden shade. Rich, handsome, perfectyet cold to other women. Carynne smiled as she brushed her hair. What every girl dreamed of was, in fact, not a man who was kind to all women, but a man who was sweet only to her. Thats why he was perfect.


    He was a knight who existed only for Carynne.


    Carynne had always wanted to see what went beyond this year, but one future she especially wanted to see was how Raymond would act after her death. What did you do after I died? My knight, did you take revenge against those who killed me? Did you shed tears, did you fall to despair? Or did you forget about me and move on with someone else?


    Carynne was convinced that the clearest, most usible possibility was her first assumption. Even before her death, he wouldnt put up with it if Carynne was involved. And if Carynne died, what then? Its a pity. She wanted to see it, but she couldnt.


    Carynne had died several times by Verdics hand in Raymonds room. Verdic was Ises father, and under certain conditions, he had seeded in killing Carynne on her wedding day with Raymond.


    At the thought of Verdic, Carynne felt her throat sting a little. Of the few instances when Carynne lost her breath through him, there must have been moments when Verdic was caught by Raymond. What had Raymond done to Verdic? Or, what did she think he did? Carryne wanted to see Raymonds reaction.


    During her first few loops, Carynne thought that the answer was to have a  Happy Ending  with Raymond. She was terribly frightened back then, but right now, it was easy enough that she could leisurely think about killing people.


    Verdic had once hacked through Carynnes neck with a hand axe, and the axes de was dull. <i>Ha, ha</i> Gasping was the only thing she could do in response, and it took a long time for her to dieit wasnt until her throat was crushed and her neck was broken.


    When Caryer would predict Verdics actions, she personally saw to it that his axe would be changed to a sharp one. She also tilted her head proactively, hoping that shed die at one strike.


    Ive really been killed through various methods, huh.


    But she wasnt the only one who would die this time.


    Carynne giggled. Like a fragrant blossom, a radiant smile spread out over her features.


    * * *


    which is why you must never sin. Those whomit sins would be thrown into the pits of eternal hell with no chance to escape. Be pure like the holy spirit


    Carynne tried not to close her eyes, holding back the yawn that was threatening to burst out. There was no better sleeping pill than a tedious sermon. This was a homily that she had heard over and over and <i>over</i> again.


    She tried to offer up a prayer. And she waited. The voice of a deity, an illusion, a mysterious appearance of an oracleanything.


    But there was no answer. She couldnt hear the voice she wanted to hear so badly. She just wanted to understand why this was happening.


    But as she went through more loops, she eventually gave up. When would her life be restored? When would this dream end? When was she getting out of this hell? Please. Show a sign. Tell me why Im suffering like this. Why <i>must </i>I suffer like this.


    D-Do not insult this sacred hour, Carynne Hare.


    Wasnt it more insulting that <i>hes </i>the one standing on that tform? Think of the people who must endure a stutterers sermon. Carynne tried to rebuke Dun, but she thought better of it when she saw a woman approaching from behind. Carynne curtsied slightly, and Ise also curtsied in return.


    Hello. Yes, Ive been doing fine. Ohoho. Insincere greetings andughter came and went. Carynne smiled at Ises colorful silver dress that didnt suit the temple at all.


    Youre not making any progress either, hm? As Carynne had decided to do her best to spend this yearmitting murder, she did think of Ise, wearing this low-cut silver dress.


    She looked like a bell handle. If she were to be held by the legs and shaken in the air, would she scream like a bell? Carynne was curious.


    Lady Hare, do you like my ne?


    Yes. Your father must have bought it for you. How beautiful


    Its like she was dangling a rope.


    Fufu, it wasnt my father who gave this to me. This is a gift from my fiance. I heard that youre getting married soon as well, Lady Hare. Did you also get a gift?


    Hey now, lets not be discouraged. Carynne sighed as she watched Duns face grow increasingly red. How could a countryside fief lords son-inwwho would marry <i>into</i> the family, by the waypossibly prepare an expensive gift on par with an aristocrats or a millionaires standards?


    But since this was something that everyone was aware of already, the atmosphere increasingly got cold.


    Oh dear, I apologize. I was tactless. Please forgive me.


    What are you saying, its nothing to be sorry about. Its a beautiful ne after all. Please show it to me againter.


    That guy would give Carynne a ringter anyway.


    Then Im happy.


    Oh, Ise, Ise. This is why it cant be you.


    Even if you try to bully me, it really cant be you. Youre rich, sure, but youre not on the same level as me. Look aroundeveryones sympathizing with me instead of siding with you.


    Carynne went with the flow and slightly shed some tears.


    P-Paying so much attention to material desires is not right.


    Ah, why must you pour cold water on my efforts?


    Dun struggled to continue speaking, trying to criticize Ise, but the more he did this, the colder the atmosphere became.


    Carynne knitted her brows. Why was he bothering her so much? She didnt want her chances to enter Ises mansion and to meet Raymond there be thwarted.


    Ill be off now.


    While Carynne stared at the sulking Ises retreating figure, Dun tried his chances at flirting with Carynne, to no avail.


    She wondered if it would be easier to seduce Raymond if she was a widow.


    * * *


    Those who saw Carynne for the first time would think this: that she was breathtaking. Everyone grieved when the kind-hearted Mrs. Hare passed away, but they felt even more sorry for Carynne, who was bing more and more beautiful by the day, as she cried for her. And though she got engaged at a young age, people who were curious about her continued toe.


    However, Fief Lord Hare would protect Carynne from their prying eyes every time. Even as everyone thought that those two didnt suit each other, the engagement was still well on its way. A subtle resentment bristled within the fief.


    And everyone who saw Carynne, amidst the bright spring flowers, smiling at Dun, they felt how their blood was boiling.


    Her bright red hair was reminiscent of a bouquet of roses in full bloom. As she ran around excitedly, the peal ofughter that burst through her lips was not out of courtesy, but of sincerity.


    Her lithe steps made her look like she was a goddess of spring, that she was dancingthat spring itself hade. She was so light on her feet that it seemed like she couldnt possibly crush a single petal.


    Everyone stopped whatever they were doing, breathless. She was like a cheerful, shimmering view of theing summers sky. How many years had it been since sheughed like this?


    This was a day worth celebrating. Spring hase. The fragrance of flowers was in the air.


    The sky was clear and blue, and the most beautiful girl was smiling with such joy.


    .


    .


    .


    Carynnes first murder was a sess.

 Chapter 5: Isella’s necklace

    Chapter 5: Ise��s ne


    <b> 01. Ises ne</b>


    Hmmngh.


    The mansion of Fief Lord Hare was famous for its breathtaking red flowers, but the uphill path from the entrance just made Ises feet suffer. From the very beginning, she didnt have a good impression.


    Even on her way here to this mansion, the carriage shook so roughly as if to let it be pronounced that the roads werent paved, and the coachman actually fell off his seat, which derailed them. And more than that, a horses ankle got injured.


    The inevitable oue was that the carriage wouldnt be able to climb the steep slope, so Ise herself had to climb with her legs burning in the effort.


    Whats so goodabout the countryside.


    Ise was so displeased to follow her father to this small countryside territory.


    It was said that thend owned by the Hares was full of flowers during spring, so much that it was rumored to be blessed by God, and in the autumn, fruits were abundant. Although it was closed off by a mountainous area, the territory had a considerable economy because precious trees were abundant while residents were few and far in between, thats why management costs werent required as much. In summary, it was a territory with excellent efficiency.


    Of course, Ises father was the one who spotted thisnd as something worthwhile, but right now, Ise could only see thisnd as something to swear at.


    <i>This will be ournd.</i>


    Verdic smiled as he held his daughters hand. It was far from major cities, so it was far from the radar of other nobles, and the household itself had only one daughter. Thisnd was the perfect prey that Verdic Evans would target. Even more, the Hare fiefdom also had few ties to other households because of their long seclusion.


    <i>Dont worry, Ise. Well be aristocrats now. The days of kings passing downnds has long since passed. Now, even territories can be bought with money.</i>


    And to have a more convenient territory, her father even had to sell some of Ises jewelry to buy the vast, uselessnds surrounding the Hare territory. Just thinking about this made Ise purse her lips.


    Among the sold jewelry, there was one that she inherited from her maternal grandmother. It was a beautiful essory that was said to have been received to pay off the debts of another countrys royal family.


    Rather than the jewelry itself, Ise Evans liked it more so because it was sort of like an extorted item. The Evans both despised yet adored the nobility, royalty and the clergy.


    From those pig-like aristocrats, who were only born into that position, it was the Evans familys pride to take advantage of theirnds, their wealth and their honor through all sorts of means.


    They wrest away all of these. And they could manage these better anyway once they were in their hands. They were the ones who truly deserved to be at the top of thedder.


    Right, I heard you met the heiress of the Hare family at the chapelst time. What do you think of her?


    Hmph. Shes not all that. Shes just tacky.


    Then Im d we were invited this time.


    Im gonna throw up.


    <i>Bleurgh.</i>


    Ises insides twisted up when she recalled Carynnes face. Sure enough, while living up in the mountains, all the rumors of her beauty were well-founded.


    No. The rumors were actually not enough.


    She was terribly beautiful.


    If Father sees the man promised to be wed to her, itll be obvious to see that the fief lord had panicked.


    Ha ha,pared to Sir Raymond, is there any other good man out there?


    That mans more like a jackass.


    Ise recalled meeting them. She had felt something poking at her stomach the moment she saw Carynnes face, but that disappeared when she saw her fianc, Dun.


    Just look at him! How could she marry a man like that, even if its for the sake of keeping your familys territory?!


    If theyre marrying within the family, they must be desperate to maintain the territory. But you know, the more desperate people are, the easier it is to do business with them.


    Thats great then.


    Ise Evansughed as she remembered Carynnes modest dress and cheap essories, and itforted her to see Dun by her side. And Ise saw the way Carynne eyed the ne Raymond gave her. Perhaps envious, Carynne couldnt take her eyes off Ises neck. This made Ise smile.


    Ise liked the light behind Carynnes eyes.


    Those eyes that glimmered with anticipation.


    * * *


    Im d you invited me, Lady Hare.


    Its my pleasure, Miss Evans. Please enjoy your stay while our fathers talk aboutplicated things. There are no otherdies of our age here, so Im very pleased to be able to spend time with you, Miss Evans.


    Compared to the rxed smile on Carynnes face, Ise was trying to hide how short of breath she was. Then, a porter handed Ise a gift, and even if it was covered by cloth that would be peeled off immediately, it was embroidered meticulously.


    Then these, Ise said.


    Bowen, Carynne called.


    Ises luggage was taken by the next attendant.


    I brought some tea for us to enjoy. Its quite popr in the capital these days.


    The tea was in a small wooden box that was engraved with ornate patterns. Such patterns and craftsmanship were something that a countrysidedy might not have even seen in her life. For a while, Carynne admired its beauty, but she was soon embarrassed because she couldnt open it.


    Enjoying how Carynne floundered, Ise unlocked the box as if showing off by saying that this was the right way to open it. It ttered open, and the sound of the sawtooth pattern turning around was beautiful. Then, the true beauty of the tea caddy could be seen.


    The enjoyment of refreshments of course through the eyes, the nose and the ears.


    She was not talking about the joy from the tea caddy but the tea itself, yet Carynne smiled and looked at the container. Ise opened it and handed it to Carynne.


    In a ce like this, I believe its only enjoyed straight, so I prepared a variety of things.


    There were also all kinds of spices. Full spice bottles were organized in categories and arranged beautifully by their color. Engraved in golden print on the lids were the names of each spice and their rmended blending recipe.


    Rather than the tea caddy, these products were beyond jewelry boxes, and none of Carynnes possessions would ever measure up to this value.


    Yes, its difficult to enjoy various vors in this backwoods ce.


    Oh my, I apologize if you were offended.


    Of course, Ise deliberately said this to make Carynne feel terrible. She waited for Carynne to speak more, but the other youngdy said nothing else and just smiled.


    When there was no further reply, Ise soon rxed as she leaned back against the backrest of her seat. When boiled water was ced next to them on the quiet table, she gained momentum again.


    Its very fragrant.


    Drinking it straight is good since the scent of each tea woulde to life, but I also like to enjoy various other vors. If you enjoy only one thing, wouldnt tea time be too boring?


    I agree, Miss Ise. It would be too boring to enjoy just one vor. Even if its not perfect, I believe that pursuing diversity is what people are meant to do.


    At Carynnes answer, Ises expression shook.


    Now isnt that too grandiose, Lady Hare.


    Life starts with tea time after all.


    Carynne put some flower petals into the tea, smiling as she took in the scent of spring.


    Ise, you dont know how happy I am that youvee to change my boring daily life.


    From the bottom of her heart.

 Chapter 6

    Chapter 6


    <strong>Chapter 6</strong>


    Mmmh.


    Ise opened her eyes. She had a headache. Where was she? The meetingst night went on for too long, then after, she was guided to a guest room where she would stay while she was in the Hare mansion.


    Even the guest room here is cheap.


    Her back hurts. Unlike the soft bed that Ise had before, this bed was filled with straw that just made her body ache all over. The sky was still dim as it was dawn, and when she opened the window, the cold air cooled down her head. The gardens flowers, which had just begun to bloom, had dew on them.


    All of these things will one day belong to their family. When she thought this, Ise felt a growing affection for the Hare territory. She would be a good Madam. And she would be a bride whod suit Raymond.


    Huh?


    Her neck felt empty.


    Huuuh?


    The ne from Raymond.


    No. My gift. Sir Raymond might get disappointed. My ne. It hasnt been that long since he bought it for me.


    Ise hurriedly looked through her pillows. Nothing. Her vision turned white.


    No. What if that Hare girl took my ne? But that cant be. Or maybe it was a maid or an attendant who took it? Im going to catch you and kill you. But what if they feign innocence? What if the culprit ran away already? Its a precious item thatmoners cant touch even if they try and earn a lot in their whole lifetime. Oh, oh my ne.


    Isey face down, crouching on the ground. Did I drop it? What should I do? No, whos going to


    <i>Knock, knock.</i>


    Who is it!


    I brought water for you to wash your face, Miss.


    The door opened. A ck maid brought in hot water. Ise wasnt in the mood to wash up, but she grabbed the maid and immediately asked.


    Who brought me back yesterday?


    It was me. You couldnt move because you were too drunk and too drowsy, so


    Who took my ne?


    Pardon?


    My ne is gone!


    I put back your clothes in the closet, Miss.


    Ise hurriedly searched inside the closet, but there was no ne. Anger boiled within her, and she hit the maid on the cheek.


    <i>p!</i>


    Ises fingernails scraped the ck skin.


    Find it this instant! No matter what!


    Ise screamed in an angry voice. The maid raised her head, holding her own cheek as she looked at Ise. At this, Ise was at a loss for words. The maidshe scoffed. While Ise was all blue with her eyes wide open, the maidughed at the girl with her lips drawn. She<i>ughed.</i> A maid wasughing at Ise.


    If it cant be found, theres nothing that can be done.


    Ise grabbed the maids hair, but at that moment, the door opened. Carynne, still in her nightgown, looked at Ise and the maid with a surprised face.


    Whats going on? Carynne asked Ise.


    My ne has gone missing!


    What? Miss Ise, please exin it again slowly. What do you mean ne?


    Its just thatmy ne is gone. I left it in my closet but it disappeared. Your maid is suspicious.


    Ise said this as she hid the nails that had scratched the maid.


    Alright. Then Ill have to mobilize all the maids and attendants to find the culprit. Its still dawn, so make sure to get dressed first, Ise.


    Thats not what Im saying right now


    Ise shut herself up. Carynne wasnt the only one who came after hearing themotion. The servants and attendants of the Hare mansion were looking at her with contempt, while the people working under her father were looking at her with pity.


    As she tried to hold back the emotions that were threatening to burst out, Ise shed tears.


    And I would like to let you know that Nancy has been by my side for a long time.


    At the words that obviously aimed to grate at her nerves, but even as Ise was incensed, she only dropped her head.


    * * *


    Though the mansion was searched all day, the ne did not turn up. Ise bit her nails. From the garden and all the way to the servants quarters and Carynnes room, even under the carpets, under the trees and in every nook and cranny, the ne was nowhere to be seen.


    Ise insisted that the Lords room should be searched as well, but Verdic hastily restrained her from doing so. At this, she cried.


    Father, what do I do


    Whye to me when you cant even keep one ne at this rate?


    Verdic loved her daughter, but he couldnt help but frown at the disturbance she had caused so early in the morning. Because he was in the middle of having to work through a tricky business deal, he wasnt happy about this.


    How could she make a fuss about a ne that didnt mean much when every word spoken here had to be carefully chosen? Wasnt that just one of many gifts and not even a ring? Verdic could easily imagine Raymond asking for the most expensive item in the store with a stony expression.


    But its from Sir Raymond


    Verdic pitied Ise, but at the same timemented her immaturity. She was a daughter who he painstakingly sired at ate age, so she wanted to raise her properly and marry her off to a good man. As he looked at his crestfallen daughter, biting back his rebukes towards her.


    It was easy to scold, but difficult to straighten out. Neither reproach nor abandonment were given to this child. Verdic repeated what he had said to the Lord, that parents want to give only good things to their children.


    A good spouse was what a parent wanted to give the most to their child, and on this note, the best asset that Verdic could give Ise was Raymondto the extent that this asset might just be too good for her.


    The engagement between them, which could have been a good bnce between an exchange of wealth and honor, began to tilt towards Raymonds side due to his repeated sesses.


    In addition, when Raymond was named the baronys sessor after the current barons eldest son had fallen sick, Raymond became one of the most coveted bachelors in high society despite being the second son of a fallen baron household.


    The splendid sesses that the fianc gained actually adversely affected his and Ises rtionship. An engagement was simply thatan engagement. It was different from marriage. If the engagement was too tilted towards one side, it would be at stake.


    The Evans patriarch became wary of Raymond. In the end, he was trying to buy thisnd excessively to match the other sides ranking, but this immature daughter of his was making a lot of noise about one ne.


    Sir Raymonds gift is very elegant, I know, but if youre that upset about it, I can get you the same one. You shouldnt bother Lord Hare or make a mistake here for no reason.


    Even if itll look the same, its not from him.


    But ultimately, its your mistake.


    Ise grew sullen and returned to her room.


    <i>Scritch, scritch.</i>


    As she walked away, a scuffling sound could be heard from the old stone mansion, as if mice were scampering by. Ise was so sick and tired of this ce.


    In the end, she couldnt find it.


    It had been such a long time since her clothes and hands had gotten dirty like this. She had been looking for her ne all day, and in the middle of it, she had since changed to low-quality working shoes worn by servants, but even those had be such a mess. What a sight.


    Sir Raymond Hell be so disappointed.


    She wanted to meet Raymond while wearing that ne. Here. In this mansion that would be hers, waiting for Raymond to rest here when he was tired. At that time, she would prove that she was qualified to be a noblewoman who would manage a territory.


    Then, she opened the door.


    Ise found the ne.


    Its over there. My ne. As expected, that woman took it.


    The ne was hanging on the maids neck. The maid, like a cheap mannequin stand, didnt suit the luxurious ne.


    However, Ise could no longer direct her anger towards the maid.


    Because there was no body under the maids neck.


    Ise covered her mouth. A scream threatened to burst out.


    <i>t/n: the narrative really does go back and forth between first person point of view and third person pov. i initially wanted to distinguish this change by italicizing the first person pov parts, but there was no such distinction in the original text, so i went back to just leaving them like that. i hope there isnt too much whish while reading.</i>


    <i>also, please note that the characters portrayed here are a product of the setting''s era, so its inevitable that there are themes of racism and misogyny, among others, strewn throughout the novel.</i>

 Chapter 7

    Chapter 7


    Father, help me. Please, God, I didnt do anything wrong. This cant be.


    After gripping her messy hair, she fled the room as though she were crazed, running down the hallway. Her eyes couldnt focus on anythingshe just ran. A corpse, a dead person, head cut off, someone died on her bed!


    Aack!


    Ise slipped and fell on the floor. Pain came over and she felt the cold air digging into her body. As she shivered, Ise crouched down while leaning against a wall, groaning.


    The night was bleak, the sky without a moon. It was too dark inside the mansion where not even a single light lit the hallway. The initial shock wore off. Fear flooded in.


    Uuh, ah, hah, ung huu


    The cold stone wall forced Ise to return to rationality. Was it a dream? A tragedy like that wouldnt even be seen on the stage of a y. What did she just see? Was it real?


    Lets calm down. Calm down. Lets think about what happened until now. After arriving here yesterday, she spent time with Lady Hare, then in the middle of it she fell asleep. The next morning, she lost her ne and got angry at this households maid. And now, the maid was on her bed, her neck severed.


    Why?


    Thosest two sentences had no connection to the rest.


    Ugh


    She didnt know. Her mind was already blocked. She couldnt organize her thoughts. The dead maid was the maid Ise got angry with earlier this morning. That dead maid was on Ises bed.


    Ise couldnt figure out what happened before that. At the very least the neno, it was an important ne. She was a victim here. And its only been a day since she came to this mansion.


    She didnt know why there was a maid whose head was severed in her room. It was a maid she met for the first time today. She didnt even know the maids name.


    This situation wasnt a theatre y. There was nothing leading up to it, but it was too suspicious to call it a simple ident. But there was nothing she couldtch onto.


    It was like she was watching aedic y for some time now, but at the end, a killer suddenly appeared. It couldnt even be called a tragedy. Street performances could do better than a progression like this.


    Why? Why? Why?


    Why was the head left in her room? Just why the hell was it done? Whats the connection to her? She had never met any of the people here. She arrived yesterday, lost her ne and searched the mansion in angerthats the end of her connection with them.


    The only thing she did to the lowly maid was say harsh words, but then the maid suddenly turned cold and became a chunk of flesh. Who in the world killed her and why the hell were they doing this to Ise?


    Why me


    A moaning cry burst through her lips.


    Its not my fault


    Ise was angry about the fact that she had to suffer from this psychological pain. She was a victim. It was unfair that she had to suffer. She was innocent yet being falsely used, so she should receivepensation for the damages incurred upon her. The investigator and Lord Hare must find out the truth. She had nothing to do with this.


    However, Ise wasnt nave enough to believe that everything would go her way without doing anything. Ise Evans was the youngest daughter of a family that deceives, steals, and gets away with it. Even if there was no intervention, she had already seen a lot of absurd facets to society.


    She needed to hurry up and tell someell her father. First of all, she would need to confess all the facts she had to her father, then they would discuss what to do next. Her father was someone who believed in her more than she believed in herself.


    Ise closed the door. The mansion was dark, damp. There were no lights in the hallway even if its the middle of the night. Stumbling along the way, Ise headed to her fathers room.


    Oh, my. Ise?


    Why.


    Of all people.


    You.


    Now.


    * * *


    Your face is as pale as a corpse. Are you feeling ill?


    L-Lady Hare


    Whats going on thiste at night? Perhaps


    Dont. Not yet. She didnt know what to say, she hadnt prepared anything yet. Her mind went nk. At that moment, Ise herself wanted to die. She felt like she was going to die from excessive stress. Carynne lifted themp in her hand.


    In Ises mind, she watched the scene of Carynne finding the head then screaming at her. Carynne was pointing her finger at Ise, saying that she was the killer. Ise gasped.


    That couldnt happen. Even if she was caught. Everyone would know that it wasnt possible. A weak woman like her didnt have the strength to do something like that.


    Oh no, you have blood on your face.


    Chills ran down Ises spine with the way Carynne said that, as though she truly felt sorry for the other woman. No. It cant be. Carynne looked at Ises skirt. <i>It cant be.</i> Its impossible, it shouldnt be possible.


    What do you mean, Im just


    Should I really say it with my lips? I know my manners.


    What was she talking about?


    Carynnes pale hand took Ises trembling hand, leading Ise smoothly.


    Come to my room.


    Come on. Ill keep your secret.


    Carynne smiled gently as she led Ise into her room.


    The bell next to the bed is directly connected to the maids quarters, but you must have been very flustered.


    Carynne embraced Ise, who couldnt speak properly and only moved stiffly, and held her gently as though she was a mother bird hugging an egg. Ises clothes were changed, then she was given tea with brandy mixed in it.


    Really, you dont have to be sensitive because of our fathers. Were still at an age where we can have casual exchanges. Right, Ise?


    L-Lady Hare Its, its not like that.


    Ise thought for a moment. Would it be better to be honest? She thought that the best route to take was to tell her father, but on her way there, she had already been caught by Carynne. And it was clear that no matter what conclusion there could be, this meeting with Carynne would affect the aftermath.


    How much should she say? With what light would Carynne view Ise?


    Since the maid that had been with her for a long time was murdered, wouldnt she unleash her resentment at Ise? And there was also the deal with Lord Hare and her fatherit hadnt beenpleted yet, and she had no idea how this incident would affect the sensitive rtionship between them.


    Did you see something frightening?


    Y-Yes!


    She saw a corpse. The head was severed. Her room was a sea of blood, the maids eyes were open, and her ne was hanging by her neck.


    Its such an old mansion that ghosts sometimese out.


    Carynneughed. It was quite fun to see Ise quivering as she held her teacup with her eyes wide open.


    There are also many people whove suffered from hallucinations. And so they saw many scary things.


    Hallucination.


    Ise seemed to have glowed as she heard the word. Right, she must have seen it wrong because she was so tired. It was such an absurd sight. Its not even a devils trick. Sure enough, the maid might have felt vindictive against Ise, so she yed something like that on her. And also with how the maid talked to Ise, a guest of the Lord, the maids personality wasnt ordinary.


    Lady Hare. I saw something scary in my room


    Goodness.


    Carynneforted Ise as though she truly felt sorry for her.


    S-Sorry to ask you of this, but can youe with me?


    Her eyebrows slightly downturned into a frown, Carynne raised Ise to her feet.


    Of course, but


    !


    There was so much blood on her skirt.


    It would be better to change your skirt before that.


    Seeing Ises mouth open, Carynne added,


    Your menstruation must have started.


    * * *


    I knew it. Its good that youre the first.


    Carynneughed as she watched the unconscious Nancy. Her mouth was gagged with cloth and her body was tied up.


    I have a lot of secrets, but I want you to listen. You looked after me like a mother, right? Nancy, you brushed my hair every morning and told me old stories every night for many years. I knew it. Its good that youre the first. Actually I didnt n this, but at this moment, Im d that youre the monumental first. I want to confess my secrets to you, but people tend to be like that, right? Even if I want to confess, its difficult to say it out loud. Theres no guarantee that the secrets would be kept Thats why I like you.


    <i>Fufu.</i> While sitting on a chair, she poured tea for herself and enjoyed its fragrance. Ises gift was quite high quality.

 Chapter 8

    Chapter 8


    Hm Where should we start. Actually to me, it didnt matter who it was. Whyd you have to tempt me like that in my own room?


    Right? You wanted me to be tempted, right?


    Carynne caressed Nancys hair as she chuckled. The maids straight ck hair was loose, then eye contact was made with dark blue irises. As expected, murder was the right choice. Wont she be able to take pleasure in seeing all different sides of one person?


    You mentioned that youre exhausted from working and that you want a vacation, and thanks to that, the other servants think youve left. And then you ate everything I gave you and you fell asleep right away.


    So its your fault.


    She cuddled the maids face. How warm.


    You know, Nancy. Ive been dreaming. For a hundred years.


    Its difficult to see Nancys expression because her mouth was gagged, and it was hard to gauge her emotions just by looking at her eyes. Eyeballs would only capture light, and a persons expression eventually would get expressed through their facial muscles.


    However, Nancys mouth was gagged, so it was hard to guess what she was thinking just by judging the wrinkles around her eyes. Carynne was curious about what Nancy would say, but she held that urge in. If the maid were to scream, Carynne would be in trouble.


    Yes For a hundred years, I died again and again. Everyones been trying to kill me and kill me again. So you know, Ill try it this time. Its my first time killing, so I dont think Ill do wellbut I think I can do it well enough since Ive suffered the same thing a lot of times.


    She pushed Nancy to the floor. The thick rug cancelled out the noise. The maid struggled. Carynne took out one of her own mufflers. This opportunity was just too good. This afternoon, Nancy hadined about Ises rudeness and asked Carynne for time off.


    And it looked like she went out and bought alcohol in the city today. She smelled faintly of alcohol. While going back for a moment to take something she left behind, and when asked if theres anything she wanted, Nancy asked if she could get time off for a week. That was the only thing.


    Its such such a good feeling to kill.


    You killed me a few decades ago. Why did you do that? Ah, Im not ming you.


    To cheer her up, Carynne gave her a mixture of some of Duns drugs in the food. Not standing for Ises violence earlier during the day, another maid had put it in Ises food, and with Nancys habit of eating leftovers often, she also ate the same thing without much hesitation.


    Im just curious. It hurt quite a bit But after that, I only felt very curious.


    But Carynne couldnt exactly listen to the reason now


    Can you tell me next time?


    Carynne went on top of Nancy. She could feel the maids pounding heart. It was a resilient body. Carynne was excited about how Nancy wriggled between her thighs. A sense of euphoria soared.


    Ill die by your hands next time I return.


    And Carynne strangled Nancy.


    * * *


    Recalling that moment, Carynne shuddered in excitement. That moment could only be described as one thing, and it was love. Her trembling hands over cloth, a sense of domination over another. Perhaps fate killed her because this feeling was so addicting.


    And here, another woman was entertaining Carynne. She even wanted to kiss Ise in the anticipation she felt. All of these characters were so lovely. What will you do, hm? Will you scream? Will you look for your oh so great father? Will you cry and look for Raymond when hes not even here?


    Dont be frightened.


    Yes.


    Ise was holding Carynnes hand, relying on her as they walked. Haha! Theres nothing to be afraid of! Im not going to kill you <i>now!</i> Because Ill go to your mansion and Ill kill more, so more people! Theres too few people in this house


    She could barely hold back theughter that was threatening to flow out of her lips.


    R Really. I dont like weird things


    Yes, yes.


    Carynne answered Ise with a kind voice, smiling.


    It was a smile that made her look like a warm-hearted older sister taking care of a scared child. Ise hadshed out to her childishly and already hated the young woman who she was trying to have the upper hand with, but at this moment, she was just captivated by Carynnes smile. It really looked like Carynne was a goddess promising Ise that there was nothing to worry.


    Theres nothing to be afraid of.


    So that fear was forgotten.


    The door was opened.


    * * *


    Really, I dont know what illusion it was that I saw.


    It was her clothes and bedsheets stained with menstrual blood that created that illusion. Thebination of her sensitive body over her pillows due to her menstruation, the ne and the maid making the mistake of leaving behind a hat just to deceive Ise. She was relieved. If she had gone to her father and got scolded, she would have been humiliated in front of others with all the shouting he might have done.


    Sighing, Ise sat on the bed.


    She seemed to have gotten flustered at just the sight of blood. And the ne and hat. Ise picked up her ne, which she had been looking all over the ce for. She saw it wrong because she had gotten so tired after this long day. Its obvious. Ise clutched her ne and turned to Carynne.


    She saw it wrong. Everything. Ise was relieved.


    I apologize, Lady Hare.


    I wish to sleep in another room. Can I retire in the next room?


    But Carynne didnt say anything, instead having a slightly scary expression. Ise called Carynne once more.


    Hare?


    Thats a relief. Yes, of course. The next room is empty, so you can rest there. Ill have the maids clean this room tomorrow.


    <i>Taak.</i>


    Carynne opened the door to the next room and guided Ise.


    Please use this room.


    Thank you.


    Relief washing over her after her fear went away, Ise felt that she was closer to Carynne. She wanted to talk to her more, but Carynne closed the door, saying that it was alreadyte.


    Ise preciously held her ne in her hands and closed her eyes. She wont lose it again. Sir Raymond. How soon can I see you again? Im nervous, Im tired, so please. I miss you.


    She knew it, the maid did not have her head chopped off. Was the maid bothered that much when she scratched her with her fingernails? Ise went to sleep with the lingering thought of, I should ask that maid to serve me something with apples in it.


    It was such a tiring and painstaking day.


    * * *


    Carynne closed the door and copsed to the floor, much like Ise did a while ago.


    The corpse disappeared.


    Carynne was always aware that she was crazy.


    So this fact couldnt be anything surprising. After living stagnantly for the past 100 years, its natural to think that she couldnt possibly be sane. She even kept in mind that she might simply just be deluding herself.


    If antiquated epistemology states that souls would leave, it should have been impossible. So when the corpse disappeared, what Carynne felt was neither fear nor shock.


    How dare.


    It was anger.


    Shes mine! Who even dared to do this! How can you be so cruel?! Why are you making it so boring!


    Carynne wanted to see Ise faint out of horror. At best Carynne wanted to see Ise shiver not because of a man, but for her to be so terrified of a primal fear. With a hideously distorted expression, go pray, be shocked, beg. Like me! But whowho was it that interfered? There was no evidence or hints or anything!


    Her anger was directed at the unknown first, and then it was turned to herself.


    If its not God or other external factors, she should punish herself for going off the rails and fantasizing it all. She should me her mind. Carynne poured out all that anger towards herself.


    <i>Bang!</i>


    She hit her own head against a wall.


    Blood trickled down. She could feel pain. She knew she was crazy, but at the very least, she wished to see the fantasy she <em>wanted</em> to see. If this was a hallucination or a delusion, in the end, the only punishment she could inflict was towards herself.


    <i>Thud!</i>


    She felt the skin on her forehead being torn. She wanted to voluntarily end it like this. Even so, she would eventually return to the same garden. No, in any case, voluntarily doing it to herself had never been sessful, and she would just end up staying in bed for an entire year before going back in time again.


    <i> apple and apology are the same word in Korean</i>

 Chapter 9

    Chapter 9


    Shed been submerged in this pitch-ck sea for over a hundred years. It was a dream where Carynne endlessly sunk down, a rope around her neck, the other end tied to a boulder. Just as the air for her to breathe had disappeared beneath the surface, her own sensitivity to emotions, philosophy, rationalityeverything had diminished. Such was the illusory space wherein she stayed.


    Even so, this was good. Under this supposition, it meant that nothing mattered to her anymore.


    Whether everything began with an idea or not, whether the cat in the box was dead or not, whether there was a shadow or a sparrow in the cave or not, nothing mattered!


    A moments eternal restlessness, its suffocating despair. The possibility of a reality that all one hundred years of memories might just be delusionsit was a tight noose over her neck.


    <i>Thunk.</i>


    As the blood kept flowing, her head became clearer and her agitation subsided.


    Hiiic h fuck


    Blood trickled down her forehead. Tears came out. As she trudged through the hallway, she shed both tears and blood.


    Everyone. Just die.


    Please.


    Ill kill everyone who can kill me.


    Then <i>no one</i> will be able to kill me this time.


    Lets start a fire. Lets burn them all. At any rate, lets see if it continues just as it normally does, whether its a delusion, whether its a matter of course. What if I kill the entire household? Will the detectives and thew enforcerse for an investigation? I want to see that, but there could be someone wholl interrupt me. Next time, Ill kill Nancy and just stay in Ises room. Thats what I should have done. Ah, but if thats going to happen, I cant keep my promise to die by Nancys hand next time.


    Mdy?


    Youre hurt?


    I tripped.


    Bowen, an attendant, was taken aback. Some time passed by as Carynne had inflicted harm towards herself. There should have been no one going through this hallway, but because Carynne met Bowen now, time must have passed.


    Over the horizon outside the window, the sunrise could dimly be seen. Quite a bit of time had passed. Servants were now out and about. Annoying. Bowen caught hold of her, but she pped the hand holding her. She just wanted to sleep.


    Theres blood, Mdy.


    I know.


    Your face is injured.


    Annoying, trying to score even like this!


    With a blushing face, Bowen grabbed Carynnes wrist. How impudent. Her brows furrowed. He was harboring this kind of interest for her, too. However, right now she couldnt care less about these peoples lust or love.


    Ha, hhow clumsy.


    She heard a familiar stutter.


    See, look at this. Annoying. Carynne shook off the stiffened Bowen. Dun was on his way to prepare for mass at dawn. Bowen bowed down hurriedly.


    Miss Ise wont be able toe out for breakfast, so bring her meal to her room. I would like to practice ying the harpsichord on my own this morning. Once Miss Ise rouses, bring her to the music room.


    Carynne sinctly gave these instructions to Bowen and sent him away. The longer he stayed, the longer Duns dawdling time would be. Its tiring. Carynne pressed her throbbing forehead with one hand.


    Y-Youre cov, ering for him, arent you?


    Do you want me to do that?


    <i>Pat.</i>


    Carynne tapped his shoulder once. If he wanted to be jealous, he should do it properly, but instead he was a man who just sighed. Ultimately, he knew that the attendant just grabbed Carynnes wrist out of concern, however he couldnt even say, How dare you towards my fiance! out of jealousy.


    In the end, Dun would wrongly aim the arrow towards Carynne. Rather than towards the attendant, he instead grumbled to his fiance.


    Hurry up and go. Ill look for a salve in your room and then sleep. Is your door locked?


    N-No.


    Alright.


    As Carynne was about to head towards Duns room, he stopped her.


    I know where it is.


    I nev, er told you.


    She knew much more than he thought she did. Even so, Carynne didnt speak up because she couldnt prove it.


    Dund took Carynnes wrist and headed for his room. ncing at him, she couldnt just say, Why dont you just go to your morning mass? since he decided to take care of his injured fiance like this.


    Carynne let out a small sigh. What to do? Looked like he wanted to score with her. Annoying.


    Im not doing it with you


    S-Shush.


    Hes flustered.


    Carynne patted the embarrassed Dun. How regrettable it was that she wasnt nning to have a rtionship with him in this iteration, but she couldnt say that.


    It hurts.


    Why wouldnt he ask where she was hurt or if she was fine. Tsk. Dun was just applying the salve and some medicinal herbs onto Carynnes forehead. Looked like he was going to use an entire pack.


    With such clumsy romantic feelings, Carynne thought things might work out to be pretty fun. She had already dated many people over such a long time. Its not something she nned on doing, but fostering a rtionship with Dun might just spice things up. It wouldnt affect her old heart, but these clumsy feelings were enough to arouse her brain.


    You might g, et a scar maybe.


    Really?


    Would it be a problem when she was going to seduce Raymond? Carynne tilted her head to the side and looked into the mirror. She didnt want to let go of her grand dream of hacking at Raymonds neck! Hes quite particr about the face, so they didnt get together when she gained weight or got burned. As expected, a man was a man.


    Still, Im still pretty, right?


    W-What?


    No?


    Ha.


    There was no need for words.


    Carynne tugged at Duns clothes. Her lips ovepped with his thin lips. Its quite cold.


    W-Why on earth?


    Dun still looked confused. She kissed him again. Licked him slightly with her tongue. While kissing him, she imagined him bing a corpse. Arent you obsessed. If so, then steal me. Take me away from the male leadfrom Raymond.


    And die for me.


    No?


    How nice it would be if you were to be enamored by me.


    So dreadfully enamored.


    * * *


    Oh my Gracious, are you alright?


    Yes, its not as bad as it looks.


    Its because you returned toote at night Goodness.


    Ise fussed over her.


    However, due to her nature, instead of continuing to pay attention to others, she soon moved on to bragging about herself. On the harpsichord, Carynne changed the piece she was ying to one that didnt require much technique for it to be background music.


    Ise sat next to Carynne and talked her ear off. About the ne she was reunited with, about the fianc who gifted her the essory. The morning air was refreshing, and Ise happily yapped away in relief after finding her ne.


    Raymond gave this to her. He gave her this one, too. The chattering girls voice sounded like a twittering bird today.


    Right. How nice. I liked Raymond, too. Around a hundred years ago, I said the same words.


    Carynne closed her eyes. There was once a time when she pitied Ise. But she didnt matter, either. She waspletely different from Dun, with regards to their form, their way of speaking, their backstories. However, she also resembled Dun. Restless.


    You must be very happy.


    Of course. My father also couldnt help but admire all of them, and he couldnt believe how high the quality they had.


    It was a merchant-likepliment. Perhaps he didnt want his daughter to notice, though Ise herself wouldnt be able toe up with the realization eitherthe meaning of these gifts. Nes, dresses, fabrics. All of them were valuable, however there was no ring to signify the promise of matrimony.


    The connection between Raymond and Ise was weak. Verdic, who had quite the acumen in the countryside, offered an engagement to Raymonds financially troubled older brother, and so the baron familys second son obediently followed the order.


    To be more precise, it would be right to say that there was nothing said between themno covenant was made and no rings were exchanged in the presence of witnesses. Even so, Ise and Verdic wouldnt correct anyone who would assume that they were betrothed.


    It was that kind of rtionship.


    Of course, its something that Carynne shouldnt know at this time. Right now, all she was required to do was look at Ise as though she was envious of the young woman. Smiling or looking pathetic or both.


    Regardless of what she felt, whenever their eyes would meet, whenever she looked at Ises clothes and essories, whenever she blinked, whenever she sometimes opened her lips to speak. They were all thoroughly calcted expressions of envy.


    As expected, a barony is something else. I like the new item that Father gave me, but


    Pitiful Ise. Nothing but a fool who sought affection from gifts, nothing but a woman who felt excitement through vanity. She was young, she was ignorant, and it was reflected in the way that she turned a blind eye to her own fathers corruption, his cruelty.


    Carynnecan I call you Carynne?


    She already was. Opening her fan, Carynne smiled with her eyes.


    Of course, Ise.


    And she recalled the memory of Ise being humiliated for asking the same thing towards a counts daughterter on. Carynne was looking forward to that event.


    Not being able to guess anything from Carynnes smile, Ise was delighted, treating the other young woman candidly just the same.


    <i> what Carynne actually says here is a shadow or a pillow but in the original text, these two words sound very much alike, so I instead reced pillow with sparrow to match the sentences tone</i>

 Chapter 10

    Chapter 10


    Come to think of it, why do you still y a harpsichord? Everyone ys the piano these days.


    Because of the difference in their timbre. And this one has been with me since I was young, so I just keep on ying on it.


    Actually, she wasnt ying the harpsichord for the sake of its timbre. The simple truth was that they couldnt buy a piano. Though her family didntck anything, they couldnt easily buy luxury goods.


    To put it more bluntly and more vulgarly, we couldnt buy such things because we dont have money.


    To maintain ss and decorum, it was best to leave it unsaid. Of course, Ise had a keen eye to notice this, however, she had no sense of consideration. No, she didnt even feel the need for it. No matter what, she wanted confirmation that she was better than Carynne.


    While touching the harpsichords keys, which looked different from a pianos, Ise asked.


    Hmm, should I give you a gift? Is it difficult for a harpsichord tuner toe all the way here in the mountains? When I listen to its timbre, the overall tone is a bit


    Its alright. Imfortable with this.


    Its incredible how she would utter rude things so casually. Carynne smiled as she looked at Ises face. Spending money and buying something for someone she hated, how leisurely she did things that werent at all supposed to be easy.


    However, the feelings of this old woman whos over a hundred years old wouldnt change just because of the minor mistakes a young girl would make. If she was going to do something more dangerous in the future, make the scalerger. This huge liar had a softplexion.


    Miss Evans, if youre feeling bored, lets walk around the fief.


    Ise agreed without any qualms.


    * * *


    Bowen, the attendant, carried their luggage and followed them from a distance. Ise wasnt very pleased that it was him waiting on them, a man. To be exact, she was conscious about the fact that it wasnt the maid that she hit, but Bowen instead.


    You know, about yesterday.


    Yes?


    I saw something scary.


    I see.


    That maid, you know, where is she? The ck maid.


    Hmm Ise, I think shes fully reflecting on her actions.


    No no, thats not it.


    She nervously cked her shoes together. Carynne answered in a worried voice.


    She asked for a vacation. She said she needed to take a break for a little while.


    Ah Thats a relief.


    Carynne pondered for a moment. Would it be better to ask her now or would it be better just to feign ignorance? Rationally speaking, the right choice was to bury the topic.


    Carynne chose Nancy for her first kill because the timing was just right, and even without the maid, she could continue on with her daily life without significantly affecting the novels future events. Even if Nancy disappeared, the overall plot of her going to Ises vi or her meeting Raymond would remain unchanged.


    So if she wouldnt ask Ise, she would just be able to proceed with her next killing without any difficulties.


    What did you see?


    Carynne instead chose to act curiously.


    I saw your maid with her head cut off at the neck.


    Pardon?


    So out of the blue, right? But as you saw, the bed was clean and the ne was there.


    Her neck?


    Yes. Now that I think about it, its ridiculous.


    Like this. <i>Shhk,</i> she pretended to cut herself on the neck.


    You must have seen it wrong.


    Its just really


    Thats weird. Carynne never cut her neck.


    Is she alright, that maid?


    How fun.


    * * *


    Ugh,


    I-I apologize.


    While Nancy was on her vacation, Donna, a young maid, was instead braiding Carynnes hair. Since she was only a year younger than Carynne, she was generally in the position to just learn about her work while doing small errands.


    Carynne was about to ask about when Nancy would return, but she soon sighed at her own forgetfulness and closed her lips. It was getting mixed up, time.


    Its fine. Wet the brush first.


    She couldnt believe that Donna, who had clumsy hands, was sent here. Thanks to that parasitic father-daughter duo, the servants seemed to have a lot more work to do. She was already missing Nancy.


    Were the negotiations with the Evans family ever this long? Its such a cumbersome period for Carynne as she already knew the ending anyway. If Evans were to pave the roads just as he pleased, many would rush in and the Hare estate wouldnt be able to handle all those people.


    Projects that usually took a decade to finish werepleted in mere months by Evans, and as he had already purchased the area surrounding the fief, he tried to collect taxes excessively. However, he failed in that department, so he went bankrupt and all the rights to the territory were handed back to the Hare family.


    One could suppose its because of his wickedness. Carynne closed her eyes.


    She didnt really feel any resentment towards Verdic Evansjust a sense of admiration at how fast his hands moved.


    Seventeen-year-old Carynne Hare. Thats how everyone saw her, but she was actually an old woman who had already lived through 100 years. Even so, she couldnt im that she knew all about the secret of how the world worked.


    Repeating the same time period at the age of seventeen, even a hundred times over, did not mean that she gained knowledge that would rival that of schrs whove made fantastic discoveries. And the problemy with innate ability, with milieu, with endeavor.


    She knew well enough about matters between men and women, however, business was a whole different thing. After decades of repeating the same events, shed attempted to stop her father and tried to sabotage the deal.


    But in the end, she found that the best method was to give this area away and waitter for Raymond so <i>he </i>could pressure Evans. So far, Carynne had been exacting vengeance in that manner. There was once a time when Evans tried to protect the Hare territory after receiving that pressure. Its worthless to do that in this life, but its still not so pleasant to think that what was once owned would be lost to another.


    How many people havee from the Evans household?


    Um Theres Verdic Evans and his daughter, Ise Evans. Then theres three specialists, two servants, one maid. Each of the three specialists also have one each of their own servants, and then there are two exclusive coachmen.


    Looks like your mouth has gotten better.


    Yes.


    It must be hard for you.


    Yes.


    Donna didnt hide her hostility. At that moment, Carynne felt a bit ufortable. Its awkward how Donna wasnt a maid from Raymonds mansion, nor was she Nancy, who cared for her like a mother would.


    Even if the Evans family was the one wholl upy this household, yes, this maid and the other servants were people of the Hare family. And of course, she was born and raised on thisnd.


    There are five people we have to wait on as guests of the family, so the work has increased threefold. Sleepes only less than three hours these days. Do you know just when on earth theyre going to leave, Lady?


    Im not sure. Me too, I hope theyll leave soon.


    Though they wouldnt disappear until they take over this household.


    As she soaked her face in cold water in a basin, she realized that another day had begun. Its still dark out. Carynne, who stayed up all night, was suffering from the weight of fatigue.


    The thought crossed her mind that she felt so tormented that she wanted to die, but she soon considered this notion to be funny. How extravagant it was for a murderer toin about being so tired that she wanted to die.


    Who was called to be Ises attendant?


    Its Sera.


    Donna replied with a very negative expression. Its fun to see her look like that.


    How is she?


    Whats the matter? Tell me honestly.


    When Carynne spoke with a small smile, the maid muttered with a pale face.


    Sheined that her meals didnt suit her taste.


    Hm.


    Thats actually a fact, and Carynne agreed with her on that. Because the roads were cumbersome, ingredients of high quality couldnte into the fief, and the greenery that did grow on thend were mostly ornamental trees, so theyre not good for eating.


    Apart from that, since the main livelihood of the territorys people was handicrafts rather than farming, not only themoners but even the fief lords family had a firm lifestyle of a simple diet. For a millionaires youngest daughter who was used to all kinds of luxurious delicacies, this ce was surely torturous.


    And she pped someone for not taking good care of her clothes.


    Goodness.


    Isnt she arrogant? After all, shes also just from the working ss like us.


    In the end, shes saying that Ise was like her, but she didnt like how the young woman was showing off.


    Carynne just smiled. Evans wanted to have the Hare household, and they wouldnt be able to stop him. What would it matter if they were to beughed at. Seeing how Carynne stayed silent, Donna realized how presumptuous she was being.


    I apologize. I went overboard.


    What for. In front of God, humans are, after all, not equal.


    Maybe.


    Eyy, of course everyones different even in front of God. Unlike me or Ise, Mdy holds a precious status.


    In the end, it was about status. Her family didnt even have great territories like dukes, counts, barons and such. Judging by the standards of this world, the Evans family held more influence than a considerable number of aristocrats, so it was absurd that Ise was beingpared to a maid like Donna. In terms of wealth, the Evans family was a few levels higher than the Hare family.


    While looking at Carynnes apathetic expression, she went ahead and emphasized the difference between Ise and Carynne.


    Even so! Youre different. Mdy has received Gods blessing.


    Was it because someone said Youll be the most blessed woman in the world when she was born? Carynne snorted. Why would anyone take such words seriously.

 Chapter 11

    Chapter 11


    Donna looked at Carynne with an envious gaze.


    Mdys beauty is evidence enough of being blessed.


    Sure


    Shed been raised from a young age being showered withpliments to the point that it was embarrassing, so it could be that she epted it naturally. Carynnes thoughts were starting to get mixed up with Carynne in the story.


    Shes sure that she grew up with shining eyes and expectations around her. Then, it would be natural for her to dream like this, too.


    A blessing was something that even gypsies on the streets could give, and the blessing she received when she was born did not mean anything big in the city. Even so, in Carynnes case, her outstanding beauty was enough to be talked about by the countryside folks as something sacred.


    As a young woman whos heard only praise all her life, Dun just couldntpare Carynne couldnt evenugh at  Carynne .


    In the end, its just fantasy. In the end, she was like a character in a theatre y. The script was a script, and a role was a role. However, if one were to repeat the same mimicry over and over again, the inevitable result was tough riotously in cynicism.


    Like  Carynne , how many female protagonists out there dreamed of a shining future that transcended reality. Even while wanting to read a plot somonce that no literary value could be dredged up from it, those whoughed at such things had also seen or read the same things countless times. There were people who ridicule a woman who could not rein in her vanity and navete, and while pretending to sympathize with her, theyfort themselves.


    In the end, despite Carynne finding love, it was the same as Carynne  running away or  Dun ughing at her. However, while those were just her personal emotions, it was a sort of appreciation for the main characters. With a drawn out sigh, she also sometimesmented their given roles.


    Sometimes, when she saw people with unimportant roles while wearing the mask of societys peoplefor example, Donna, who was under such illusionsCarynnes heart seemed to tighten up.


    Their clothes were different, but the roles they yed and the lines they spoke were much the same. Nancy. Donna. Sera. There was no difference.


    Then if you look at it that way In the end, she realized that she was also a mere doll acting upon a given role Thats too


    Mdy?


    Mm, its nothing. I just dozed off for a second.


    I apologize for not being able to speak well. Nancys vacation was extended


    Was that how it was covered up? She wondered how long thebel of a vacation would change. The corpse disappeared. In a way that didnt make sense.


    Ise had mentioned that the corpse was mutted in a way that Carynne didnt do, so the clear conclusion was that there was a third party. Who touched it, she wondered.


    <i>Jjak.</i>


    M-Mdy?


    Im just sleepy.


    You cant do that! Your face your face, what should


    Im sleepy.


    Lets not be caught up in a turmoil of thoughts, Carynne. What you dont know is what you dont know. Youll find out if you continue to experiment.


    Donna.


    Yes?


    If youre having a hard time, why not take a vacation?


    Hehe, its fine. Everyone has a huge workload these days, so itll be really hard if Im also gone.


    While pursing her lips in regret, she recalled the date.


    Time flies by so fast.


    It was almost time for <i>him </i>to show up.


    Carynne gave up on her short break and started to prepare for her encounter with the male protagonist.


    Shed have to slim down her waist, take care of her skin, get her hair done. When meeting him, she didnt have to worry about amassing wealth or power. There was but one requirement.


    She had to be pretty no matter what.


    * * *


    What the. Just when did you say shesing back?


    I-Im not sure Its at least two weeks


    How can a maid be granted two weeks of vacation!


    Ise held Sera up as she got angry. <i>But its the truth</i>, the maid cried as Ise shook her, but the young woman soon copsed into her seat, exhausted. Was it because of her period? Her lower abdomen was tight. She held her stomach andy down.


    <i>Shudder.</i> Goosebumps came over her.


    I saw it there.


    That strange delusion. The woman who was cut off at the neck. She wanted to be assured, so she needed to confirm it herselfthat it was a dream, that it was an illusion.


    She wished to see the maid living and breathing with her own eyes. But then all she heard was that the maid had taken a vacation that started on that very day. Nobody saw her, and so while repeating, It cant be. It cant be, she got nervous for no reason.


    A maid that was taking such a long vacation just because she was feeling terrible? Odd. She wasnt a high-borndy-in-waiting, but a mere personal maid of the daughter of a countryside fief lord. She was also a dark-skinned woman, so the chances were even lower.


    In addition to taking care of Carynne, there were all sorts of chores ted for a maid like her because guests like Ise were here for an extended visit, so it couldnt be that the maid was allowed that long of a vacation when there was so much work to do.


    Ise couldntprehend it.


    She wanted to ignore it, but doubts continued to swirl in her mind. Just as her menstrual cramps couldnt be relieved right then, that unpleasant feeling was stuck on her. Apart from the disbelief and embarrassment she felt from showing such a disgraceful appearance to Carynne, she was still very much doubting whether it did or did not happen.


    Perhaps it was all a hallucination. But Ise had never suffered such a thing before. Her monthly menstruation fluctuated her mood and gave her cramps, but it was never so severe that she would see things like this. Before hallucinations, she rarely ever had any nightmares in the first ce.


    Even if she was in the dark, there were always maids by her side who made her forget her fears. Incense wafted through her room, which was full of decorations and veils, and there, a pleasant bed was promised to her.


    After a good day, better days would follow, and her fathers business ventures had never failed. What was left in her future was to be a dignified noblewoman.


    So why.


    No


    Ise didnt want to admit that she was feeling anxious.


    No. She shouldnt doubt the happy future ahead of her. Shes the Evans familys precious daughter. There will always be happiness ahead of her.


    The ne


    The colorful ne was neat and without any blemishes. Was there really blood on this? Ise rolled over the ne in her hands. This ne had no ce in such a nightmare.


    The unchanged jewels seemed to promise a tranquil, eternal peace. However, as the memory of the corpse stayed with Ise, she became even more frightened the more she looked at the ne.


    Even if the gemssted forever, she realized that she could die at any moment.


    Theres something strange about this fief.


    Pardon?


    You dont feel it?


    What should she say to the maid here?


    Seeing Seras expression, which was full of suspicion and irritation, Ise stopped there. Somethings strange, but the maids in this ce didnt know because they only served as hands and feet. Even that something was difficult for them to grasp.


    Clicking her tongue, she closed her eyes.


    What was up with this ce. She was eventually going to own this. Would it be fine? Was this something she could ignore? To straighten this out, where the hell should she start?


    Miss Ise Evans.


    Yeah?


    A telegram from Sir Raymond has arrived.


    Her thoughts about the maid were soon pushed aside into the abyss, and Ise became delighted again as she snatched the telegram to read it.


    And promptly, she looked as though she was about to cry.

 Chapter 12: Der Freischütz

    Chapter 12: Der Freisch��tz


    <b>02. Der Freischtz </b> The marksman with magic bullets


    Y-You cannot.


    The coachman was astonished.


    Since when have <i>you</i> be <i>my</i> master?


    If Milordyour fatheror Lord Dunes to know this, it is only I who will die, Mdy


    Thats none of her business. Carynne leaned down slightly.


    In fact, Carynne didnt want to cause amotion either. This was all hardbor for herthe novels events, what needed to happen.


    Carynne had to go to the town. There were many reasons for  Carynne  to go out. The circus hade to visit, there was a famous musical band, and there were also merchants whode to sell peculiar items.


    Carynne  was to coax the familys coachman into bringing her there because she wanted to go to the vige alone and take a look. Because the Evans Guild was here, carriages had been frequentlying and going these days, so it wouldnt be obvious if she nned her outing now.


    Her father and fianc were both busy, and Ise didnt want to deal with her, saying that she was in a bad mood. At this time while the servants were busy,  Carynne  had no intention of hanging around here.


    Carynne actually just wanted toze around, but as the female protagonist, she had work to do. The situationter would be easier this way. So, Carynne was ying the role of a youngdy who couldnt stand being bored and would eventually slip away from home for a moment.


    Her hair was deftly braided, and she was wearing an old but neat dress with flower print on it. She also had a cloak over her, which was made of rough fabric. She didnt look excessively shabby, but at the same time, these werent the clothes that a youngdy of the upper ss would wear.


    As she got older, she really didnt like old things either. Pushing down herints, while wearing these clothes that didnt suit her tastes, Carynne said shed go downtown without apanion.


    Of course, the coachman made a face that looked as though something dirty had been pushed into his mouth. When she said shed go out secretly, it was amusing for her to y around with the servants. But considering that the road was rugged and the slope was so severe, it really was an impossible task to truly sneak out.


    While on an adventure out into the forest, she recalled the memory of a wild boar that had a hole in its guts, and she harassed the coachman. Anyway, these days, dont you have to keep going back and forth because theres so much work?


    She tried to convince him by saying that she would just use a carriage from the town for her trip back home, but it was no use. With two stomps of her heel on the ground, Carynne threatened the coachman.


    From whom do you get your sry?


    From Milord. Not from you, Mdy.


    Now, she moved one hand. The corners of Carynnes lips tugged up as she reached out.


    How about this?


    What she was holding out was money. The coachmans eyes widened for a moment, but then his eyes closed again. He wanted to take it, but he seemed to think that the risk was still high.


    I could get fired


    Trailing off like that meant that hed ept the offer as long as more money was to be given, but Carynne ignored this signal because she really wanted to go out and spend the money herself.


    Eyy, whats the chance of that happening?


    But if Mdy goes out alone and something happens, Ill definitely get fired.


    How long has she been an adult? Seeing the coachman shake his head, with her eyebrows furrowed, Carynne frowned and stomped her heel again. I want to y outside! Her bodys actions clearly conveyed that she was whining.


    Shaking his head again as though he was tired of it, the coachman spoke.


    But what if Ie back quietly without causing any trouble? I just want a change of pace, and with this you can also earn extra ie. Honestly, here its the countryside. When will this opportunitye again?


    Even if its a vige, its a ce where Mdy has beautifully grown up, so there are many things that cant be done.


    What, like a woman going to a pub?


    No, its not Its not necessarily like that, but


    And even though its the countryside, everyones been mentioning interesting thingstely, so I want to see.


    Then please go with Lord Dun.


    I dont wanna!


    Seeing Carynne reject the suggestion so fervently, the coachman clicked his tongue.


    Its dangerous for a woman to be alone. So um, if Mdy would really like to go, please go with your servants.


    Everyones too busy.


    The coachman and Carynne had a brief stare-down. One gaze said, <i>And youre going to leave even while knowing this! </i>but while shamelessly raising a chin, the other gaze said, <i>Thats exactly why Im secretly going out!</i>


    Its just, everyones so busy, well Its not that its wrong to rest sometimes. Um, if its Mdys personal maid, she wont have to be in charge of cleaning the manor or cooking in the kitchen, so even if that maid goes out for a bit with Mdy


    Aha.


    Shed gone through this dialogue dozens of times before, but it felt like something was off. Somethings nagging herah, right. The usual dialogue should have continued like this.


    But <i>she </i>wasnt here right now. Carynne held a hand over her trembling heart. How should she continue? Whats her next card? Its a gamble. Which way should she go.


    You like Donna, right?


    Pardon?


    The coachman was visibly flustered. His skin was reddening.


    T-Thats not it! No, but, why, so suddenly


    So you dont like her?


    No, its not that


    Oh my, oh my. Your face is bright red. This boy.


    Im ten years older than Mdy.


    And youre also ten years older than Donna!


    At the boiling face, Carynne smirked. The coachmans expression came undone. No one would be strong enough to go against someone who''s both their superior and a beauty. The atmosphere quickly softened.


    Sorry, sorry. Im not teasing you. Everyones just so busy these days.


    So Im going to give those kids some gifts. I heard a lot of new things are being sold nowadays, so I want to take a look around.


    Mdy really cannot go alone.


    Okay, okay, Ill go get Donna. She can just go y with me.


    Even so, youre both women, so you still cant.


    Fine, I got it already.


    She raised her hands in surrender.


    Ill also go out with a male servant. Its really hard to live as a woman.


    She left behind the red-faced coachman. While avoiding the eyes of the senior maids, Carynne went to call out Donna, who was dozing off in one corner of the maids quarters.


    Moderate dialogue, ordinary humor, the usual whining, a simple end.


    Helen, the housekeeper, sent out Donna with Carynne with a sigh. I have a lot of work to do, but youre going out to y! Meanwhile, Bowen checked the time while wearing his hat, emphasizing that they should return before dinnertime.


    Hurry up!


    With an excited voice, Carynne called the maid and the attendant and headed towards the carriage.


    It was the nth time that she was going on this outing, and the refreshing wind brushed against her hair. The air was clean and fresh. She was helped into the carriage, and she saw Donna running with an excited face. Bowen was walking at a slower pace behind her, looking more dignified.


    Along with the girls smile, her bright voice came close to the carriage. When she heard this, Carynne made the effort to raise the corners of her lips. Change is fun. She smiled.


    After some effort, she could barely maintain a smile before Donna had gotten onto the carriage. She made a fuss as she sat down and looked out the window, saying that she was looking forward to the trip.


    Carynne also looked out the window, likewise muttering that she was excited as well.


    The story had changed. This was something she could be happy about. On this trip, she had always gone out with Nancy. How different would the dialogue be just by changing the maid apanying her? There would be new lines. Maybe she could go to a new ce. Even the ocean which she yearned to see.


    This trip was important. The  inciting incident  and the  first meeting  would take ce during this outing. After that, the event of the coachman being scolded and fired was very trivial.


    Whats the name of the coachman again? Carynne didnt bother to think further, she couldnt remember the name anyway. After this brief dialogue, he was a character who wouldnt appear in the story anymore.


    But she knew one thing.


    Carynne closed her eyes. And after one count, she let out a long exhale.


    The coachman originally blushed while looking at Nancy.


    Always. For more than one hundred years.


    <i>t/n:</i>


    <i>This arc''s title ( ) can be tranted to The marksman with magic bullets but it also refers to Der Freischtz, a German opera by Carl Maria von Weber that follows the tale of a young hunter named Max.</i>


    <i>You may read more about it here:</i><i> /en/items/works/der-freischutz-kind-von-weber-1821</i>


    <i>Watch an adaptation of the opera here:</i><i> /watch?v=JtWFAo3eX8E</i>


    <b><i>BUT!</i></b><i> Resetting Lady mirrors this opera quite a bit, so don''t watch the opera or read a summary of it if you don''t want to be semi-spoiled haha</i>


    <i>Here''s the overture if you just want to listen to a little of it to get into the mood:</i><i> /watch?v=s_o-hIEia5I</i>


    <em>For update pings, novel discussions and/or to send mistake reports, join our discord server~</em>

 Chapter 13

    Chapter 13


    Business was prosperous.


    Donna was born and raised in this area, and when they arrived, her eyes widened, saying that it wasnt like this until just a while ago. There was no road like that there beforerather, it was a garbage dump.


    Everywhere they went, she would burst into exmations. The improvements were going crazy fast. Sure enough, the Evans family, who hadnt been here for long, continued their diligent hunt.


    Look over there, goodness Such a big circus came to this town.


    Right.


    Instead of cherry picking the Hare household, the Evans family was trying to take the territory for themselves. Thats why the fief was being developed at such a crazy rate thanks to the enormous wealth and skills being poured out by Evans.


    The fiefs residents were puzzled, but they couldnt take their eyes off the entertainment and wealth being provided, and they secretly started favoring the Evans family.


    Even Donna, who couldnt hide her hostility towards the Evans family, showed such excitement at the spectacle she was seeing. She begged Borwen.


    Excuse me Mister Borwen


    Yes.


    When the two girls looked up at Borwen with shining eyes, he was forced to check the time once again and bought a ticket, reminding them once again that they shouldnt bete ining back.


    Its still a bit of timeter, so lets just look around the town a bit more, Carynne said.


    Yes.


    The number of people increased, and Carynnes old fatherwho wasnt good at businessand her clumsy fianc were being eaten up by the sneaky merchants from the city. She already knew about those facts, but she wasnt thinking about interfering in this life.


    Very smoothly, the Hare household was dropping into ruin. That was just a minor thing for Carynne this time. The household would go bankrupt, everything would be seized, their meals would be shabby, Dun would return to the monastery in the mountains, and the deste fief lord would die in agony.


    It was a good enough tragedy that would add to the pitiful loveliness of the female protagonist.


    The streets are really crowded!


    Borwen hurriedly followed behind the young women, who were running amongst the people on the street. When Carynne and Donna picked this and that, Borwen was the one who paid and carried the things. Then, when he looked up again, they were suddenly already at another store far away.


    The attendant was quickly drained of his energy.


    Tsk, tsk. Surely enough, men who only do convenient things have only that much stamina.


    Donna smiled as she entered the hatters shop first, followed by Carynne. Without entering the store, Borwen waited outsideit was awkward for him toe in because the store sold only items for women.


    Filled with fluttering fabrics, harmonious decorations and various hats, it was a ce that induced excitement. In addition to the hats, they also sold inexpensive essories and sewing tools.


    Carynne was the daughter of the fief lord, so she didnt exactly buy things. The best items were first given to the lord. Rather than opening their own stores like this, the best seamstresses and the most skilled workers were bound to be employed by the mansion.


    However, barring the actual quality of the items, she found that there was a unique charm about going around like this. It was a different kind of fun. Instead of buying things for herself, she either watched her servants or bought things for them.


    Between folds of fabric, Donna whispered while looking outside the store window.


    Male attendants dont do much, and theyre just annoying because they just try to look cool.


    Really?


    Yes.


    But all the attendants do physical work, right?


    Bringing tea, carrying luggage or opening the doors when there are guests?


    Why are you so upset?


    Theres heaps of work, but see. We came on this outing here thanks to Mdy.


    She put on a hat and turned around.


    Not that.


    Donna grew sullen and picked up another bo. The sky bluerge brim hat looked quite good on Donnas brown hair. While looking in the mirror, she smiled as though she knew it, but Carynne shook her head.


    Thising summer will be quite hot, so a boater hat would be better than a bo thats made of fabric. The bos brim would cover your face, but the fabric would make it humid, so your hair would stick to your sweat.


    Thising summer?


    To be exact, she couldntpare it to  another summer  because she didnt know any other. However, she knew that the servants, the merchants and everyone else would sneakily roll droop in the heat while rolling up their sleeves and go out without wearing their undergarments.


    Yes, thats what I said. Anyway, what do you think of Borwen?


    Its not that I dislike Mister Borwen.


    Comparing the sky blue bo with the boater hat made of straw, Donna nced at the attendant.


    Its just I think there are too many attendants in the manorpared to the number of maids. Actually, attendants do less than the maids, right? Maids have so much to do throughout the day, like washing dishes, preparing meals, cleaning and changing the bed sheets. Meanwhile, all the attendants have to do is dress up, open the door and sometimes carry luggage, but hnghh. They even get paid more, hnngh.


    Is that so.


    Was it due to her fathers vanity? Or perhaps it was a product of a romance novels worldbuilding. In her mind, whats left of the words that described Carynnes life was such an old memory that there were ashes.


    The memories were seared into her brain as though theyd been scorched by mes, and even after a hundred years, they throbbed as they revealed their existence.


    There didnt seem to be anything like the number of maids written in the script. When she giggled, she waved a hand when Donna looked at her strangely.


    Should this be called an error? But its too grand tobel her fathers mismanagement as divine error.


    Not too long ago, Sera said that she was scolded by Lady Ise while delivering a telegram. Its not like <i>shes</i> paying us or anything!


    In a few months time, shell be giving you your sry. Carynne giggled again. For a maid, Donna had a rather rash mouth. Was it because she was still young and because she was originally in charge of theundry?


    However, it was more satisfying to have new dialogue so as to brush away boredom. Bringing out Donna to this trip also had such a reward like her prattling.


    What happened?


    While delivering the letter, Sera was scolded for giving it with her hands instead of putting it on a tray.


    Oh my.


    Its like she detests even touching us, goodness.


    Oh right, we dont have trays for letters.


    Uh I-Its not that Oh I apologize.


    Having been acquainted with the Countess, Carynne knew how many nobles thought it was disrespectful to touch their bodies, but she didnt want to tell Donna about it.


    Instead of graciously informing her about how ss differences worked, Carynne med her own poverty. In a countryside like these, there were insrws and customs, so it was meaningless to give such advice.


    Im joking.


    Uh


    Laugh.


    Ohoho.


    Though it was awkward, the two burst intoughter.


    In the end, people of the same gender spent the most time closely. Evenparing time spent for dialogue, Carynne would spend more than half of the novel with Ise rather than Raymond.


    However, Raymonds importance as a character was naturally higherpared to Nancy, Donna and Ise. Even Duns importance was higher than the maids since this was a romance novel.


    Instead, lets add some decorative cloth on the boater hat. Not flowersribbons.


    But this time, Nancy as a character has be more prominent. Right now, instead of Raymond, Nancy enthralled Carynnes daily life more intensely.


    Whenever she opened her eyes in the morning, she saw Donnas face, not Nancys, and she would feel a sense of aplishment.


    She previously thought that it was a meaningless change because all maids were the same, but because Donna was just aundry maid who had never been a personal maid, her fingertips were not as smooth as Nancys. She was also a bit dense, but she was cheerful, and Carynne liked the eighteen-year-olds innocence.


    Above all, she was proud that she had managed to change the characters.


    So while giving Nancy or Donna time and affection, Carynne enjoyed thinking about cutting into the maids stomach with a knife at any given time.


    Though she could be regarded as someone wicked, her beautiful heart was not a lie, and so there was nothing to worry.

 Chapter 14

    Chapter 14


    Thats not it.


    Alright


    But this time, the muffler that Donna picked up really didnt suit her, so Carynne just stopped her for that reason. It looked like an old womans muffler, but still, Donna didnt let go of it.


    No way, are you really going to pick that?


    Huh? Ah, doesnt it look good though?


    It doesnt. At all.


    Actually, why dont we give it to Missus Deere?


    Who?


    Huh?


    Do you hate that Missus Deere person?


    No, its not like that Mdy, its <i>Missus Deere.</i>


    Who the hell.


    Carynne was confused.


    The moment Donna asked why she didnt know who it was, Carynnes face turned red. She flitted through the characters in her mindthe manors servants, the townspeople she knew, even people in high society Donna didnt know. But there was no one named Missus Deere.


    Seeing Carynne being flustered, Donnaughed as though to tease her.


    Oh, Mdy. She was your private tutor for about eight years.


    Private tutor?


    She couldnt remember. Donna was more surprised to see Carynnes flustered expression.


    Missus Deere That, the etiquette and dance tutor Mdy had I dont really know much about it, but She taught Mdy this and that. Do you really not remember?


    Ah, ahh. Ah.. Missus Deere.


    Yes, yes. I thought Mdy came here on purpose because the missus lives nearby.


    Theres no way she just <i>didnt </i>remember. Carynne didnt have that memory. She was a little taken aback because she had lived as  Carynne  for over a hundred years, but it was only one year that was repeated to no end.


    A private tutor. She knew that a tutors room was connected to a childs room, but it was empty for such a long time, so there was no need for her to go inside it.


    But even more than a hundred years ago, there was no such thing as a tutor for  Carynne . No, <i>after </i>she had be Carynne.


    There was no way that a fief lords daughter would only live with a maid and without a tutor. Like men, women were taught liberal arts, though they wouldnt pursue further studies in a monastery or in a university. These were things that Ise or maids like Donna could not teach.


    It hasnt been that long, but it feels weird because the person whos always been there isnt there anymore. Mdy also saw her every day, right?


    Yeah, its been about a hundred years.


    Pardon?


    Watching as Donnaughed, Carynne further said that its no wonder that she didnt remember. But of course, Donna just continuedughing and said, Certainly.


    In one hundred years, Carynne had never heard Missus Deeres name. She left the Hare manor before she turned seventeen, and she never went into this store with Nancy.


    For Donna, it was just a few years ago, but for Carynne, it was more than a hundred years ago. In fact, she never experienced it.


    Even though the tutor had been in the manor for eight years, she wasnt mentioned again because she wasnt an important character.


    Carynne couldnt help but admire how beautiful an unpredictable life was.


    A novel was just a novel. The numerous encounters and the countless events werent normally important, but they took precedence in Carynnes life.


    She hardened her expression so that her excitement wouldnt seep through.


    Right, then what would be good to give her?


    Shes still young, so wouldnt pink be good?


    Really?


    Carynne asked about Missus Deere while choosing one thing or another, saving her words. Donna chatted a lot about the tutor just as she should, but Carynne gleaned less information that she thought she would.


    Missus Deere was a friend of Carynnes mother. She was previously middle-ss, and she worked as Carynnes tutor for eight years. Like with most tutors, she was of a different staturepared to the maids, so she mainly spent time with Carynne and the fief lord and madam.


    Its said that after Carynnes mother passed away, the tutor quit her job and received a pension for her daily living. Also, she had a particrly bad rtionship with Nancy.


    Mdy, did you hear that Nancy was a gypsy before she became a maid?


    Um I think I did


    So the missus tried to kick her out because she thought that Nancy was dirty.


    Oh my goodness.


    Thats why Oh, why dont we just go next door?


    Of all things, Carynne was stiff, and she felt a little nervous. She didnt know anything about this person she supposedly saw every day for eight years, so she couldnt prepare for anything. She would look odd. However


    While hesitating because she couldnt think of a good excuse, fortunately, Borwen came into the store right then. Its time for the circus act.


    * * *


    Its really ugly.


    Isnt it?


    Donna, be quiet.


    Ignoring Borwens words, Carynne eagerly talked to Donna about the ape andmented on its ugliness. She couldnt believe that there was such an ugly animal.


    Carynne had never been to the circus during this outing scene.


    When she went out with Nancy, it wasnt during this day, so back then they would watch either band performances or street musicians. She didnt go to a hatters shop, nor did she go to the circus.


    She still thought that it was a good thing to kill Nancy, but in the next iteration, she decided toe here again with Nancy because it was just so exciting. Wasnt it a pretty fun sight to see? Nancy should see this, too.


    Nancy Nancy would like this kind of thing too, right?


    Pardon?


    Im talking about Nancy.


    Would there be anyone whod hate watching this? Oh, but I dont know about Nancy. Shes a gypsy by nature, so maybe shes done this before?


    How about we enjoy watching quietly? Borwenmented.


    Im done, tsk, Donna replied.


    Come to think of it, there wasnt much Carynne knew about Nancy. Right. Had she ever done something like this?


    Even so, rather than a maids uniform, it was difficult for Carynne to imagine Nancy wearing revealing clothes alongside the other women, performing tricks in the air. Shes always worn the same maids garb.


    A woman with tinum blond hair smiled and waved her hand. Her face shone with thick makeup, but Carynne shifted her gaze towards the womans firm muscles. She tried to imagine what the womans face would look like under the makeup.


    Then the woman threw herself into the air. The height was perhaps three stories above ground, but there no hesitation could be seen from her.


    She threw herself like that before. It was also about that high. She prayed for a quick death. The woman was now fluttering. Her form, as she was falling, was very beautiful. Shes smiling. As the woman fell, Carynne cried.


    Kyaaa!


    <i>Thud.</i>


    Soon after one rotation, the man who was waiting at the bottom caught her and flung her right back up. She shone, like a white bird. Again, someone from above caught her as well.


    Carynne had been falling endlessly. What awaited her at the bottom wasnt revival, but the stench of filthy blood and the terrible expectation of a book being closed. There was no hand to hold. She only fell endlessly.


    I really thought shed fall.


    Me, too.


    Actually, she really did expect it. May your neck be snapped, may the tragedy begin anew.


    The  inciting incident  would happen today anyway. Then, wouldnt it be alright if she fell? Carynne was disappointed. And she felt the unfamiliar emotion of jealousy towards the circusfor people to see death right before their eyes, to hear theirughter mixed with her own.


    Ugh.


    Dont think about it. Just enjoy the sight in front of you.


    Its her first time seeing this, so itll be a shame if she didnt revel in the sight. Unlike the previous loop, Carynne was able to sit here in the best seat, enjoying the show with drinks because she was on an outing with servants this time. She didnt run away.


    You cant drink something that strong during the day. And especially you, Donna, you still have more work to do once we go back, Borwen scolded.


    Uwah this is too


    Then Ill settle for a beer, Carynne said.


    Alright.


    Borwen called a passing employee, from whom he got a full ss of beer.


    What about me? Donna asked Borwen.


    No.


    Haha


    <b><i>Next, the pride of our circus! Please give a warm round of apuse!</i></b>


    Wow


    Whats that?


    Cheers roared around them, and apanying it was a dull, heavy sound.


    A strange animal entered.

 Chapter 15

    Chapter 15


    It was a giant grey animal. It was a beast that shed only read about in novels, and so her mouth gaped open automatically.


    There was a luxurious part of it that was made of ivory, but it was on a living animal. Its grey color all over itsrge body didnt seem to match the light-colored ivory at all. The picture of a huge, elegant animal in Carynnes mind, which she vaguely imagined, was broken.


    <b><i>This animal is a beast called an elephant, and it uses its nose as though its a hand. It drinks water with its nose, too! Youd find no other animal that drinks water with its nose. Who would like to try?</i></b>


    But I did die from water up my nose back then.


    Pardon? What fool would die like that?


    Be quiet and just watch.


    It was an extraordinary animal that waspletely different from the usual animals that appeared in the fief, like deer, birds, and wild boars. It had no fur, and its ears were bigger than a gigantic drum.


    It didnt have the elegant color that she imagined, but it still had a peculiar charm to it.


    The elephant performed various tricks to prove just how smart it was, and as it moved its nose, it was apletely different movement that could be seenpared to other animals. As though it was a hand, the nose was used to pick up and give things.


    Amongst the cheering audience, Carynne also reached out her hand. She wanted to touch its long nose.


    Its dangerous. Please dont do that.


    Borwen retracted Carynnes hand.


    Annoying. Scenes were bound to happen and people were bound to die. Of course it was dangerous for Carynne. But death was a trivial thing for her. Those who interfered in the things she did were nothing more than obstacles to her entertainment. She pulled back her hand and reached out to the animal once more.


    She made eye contact with the elephant. Carynne found it interesting that the humongous beasts eyes were so small. And for a brief moment, she smiled.


    Therge elephant then approached her. Carynne reached out her hand. Was it going to shake her hand with its nose?


    <i>Boom.</i>


    <i>Boom.</i>


    <i>Boom.</i>


    <i>Boom.</i>


    This bastard!


    Its steps did not stop.


    The trainer noticed the animals unusual behavior. He stabbed the elephant on the side with a small spear. Then, as blood flowed out, a woman screamed as she saw it.


    However, even though its thick skin was pierced, the elephant did not stop stepping forward. The trainer stabbed it with the spear again, but the weapon fell off in no time.


    The booming steps continued down the stage. The beast approached the audiences seats and came closer to her. Carynne was filled with joy. Someone else in the audience finally stood up, screaming, but it was toote.


    The trainer shouted and blocked its way, diverting its attentionbut it was meaningless. He could no longer stop the elephant.


    <i>Boom.</i>


    You cant!


    AAACK!


    <i>Crunch, crunch.</i>


    Horrific sounds. Blood sshing. The man wielding the spear, crushed.


    For a few seconds, the shocking sight paralyzed the crowd into a deafening silence.


    Nobody moved. Until the ringleader shouted.


    Get out of there right now! Hurry!


    Then, screams filled the air quickly. People ran towards the small exit. However, those who were overwhelmed with fear got tangled and copsed.


    In a blink of an eye, they were seizing each other by the ankle. Chairs fell to the ground and were left abandoned.


    Pandemonium broke loose in that circus tent. It was a living hell.


    Mdy! This way!


    Borwen got to his feet and removed the chairs blocking the way in front of Carynne and Donna. However, the good seats that they had were too far from the exit.


    Any chair or any person was too smallpared to the elephant, so the giant beast continued towards Carynne without any interference. There was a circus staff member blocking its way, but the elephant just swept him away with its nose and continued trudging forward.


    Nothing can stop it. Carynne stared at the elephant. That nose was quite strong. She marveled at it.


    Ah


    KYAAAAA!


    A child had been pointing at the elephant in excitement, but the childs bones were soon crushed as the elephant drew closer. Its heavy foot alsonded on a woman, who had tried to get the child out of the way. More chairs were broken.


    The elephant was fast approaching still. Carynne raised her head. Borwen was blocking Carynne and Donna. Its hefty body slowly came forward, and the animal and Carynne met eyes once more.


    The elephant knelt down. Carynne hadnt reached out yet.


    She smiled.


    Someone covered her eyes.


    It happened along with a tremendous roar, and Carynne wanted to dig her fingernails into the hand that was over her eyes. Cover my ears, you dolt! However, rather than enduring the loud sound, she had to cover her own ears immediately.


    Even so, the ringing in her ears bothered her. There was a high-pitched beeeeep shaking up her brain. Then, she heard another gunshot.


    Its loud, stop it, I said its too loud! Leave. Leave it alone!


    The shouts of her heart couldnt be heard.


    The smell of gunpowder poked at the tip of her nose, and as she opened her eyes, she coughed.


    Ah


    As expected. Thats right. The elephant was right in front of her, the shadow of its huge body covering her. Its gray body had holes and blood strewn everywhere. As expected, it couldnt be helped either. Carynne walked closer to it.


    Even arge animal like this, even if it had such great strength. Its life ended while lifting things and crushing people. Dozens of bullets were embedded in its skin, but as she halted after her first step, she saw the urate shot in the middle of its head.


    Its obvious who did it. This kind of role wasnt given to just anyone.


    Carynne approached the elephant. Its breath hadnt stopped yet. But even with treatment, it didnt seem like it would survive. Rather than a matter of treatment, an animal that had harmed humans would not be allowed to live.


    Its skin was thick. So bullets could pierce this kind of skin, too. Even if she hadnt touched it, she could feel its warmth. Carynne reached out. She wanted to touch its long nose.


    Step back!


    Someoneno, Carynne knew who it was.


    He grabbed her arm roughly, and she stumbled as she fell back. Nobles spoil the fun in a ce like this, too. This man was Raymonds squire, Xenon. Hes here, so of course, this guys here, too. Again, this time, hes here. Its just not fun


    Carynne looked towards where the initial sound of a gunshot came from.


    Hes here. The golden devil. The marksman with magic bullets.


    Raymond.


    Her lover for more than a hundred years. Her male lead. Her knight.


    The man who didnt even know her face right now.


    The distance between them was quite far, but theres no way she couldnt recognize him.


    Theres no way he wouldnt take notice of Carynne either.


    She turned away. Now was not the time to pay attention to him. If he was close enough when he helped her, Carynne would have expressed her gratitude, but since he helped from afar, she didnt know and stopped caring.


    This was how the first meeting went. But more than Raymond, Carynne wanted to see the animal in front of her, to see its nose move before it died.


    <i>Tak.</i> Xenon grabbed Carynnes shoulder roughly. Seeing his hand on her, she spoke.


    Let go.


    Fuc Get out of the way, woman.


    Ill forgive your insolence. But youre the one who needs to get out of the way.


    Borwen then rushed in and stood between Xenon and Carynne.


    Thank you for sorting it out. Mdy is still young, so


    Damn it, then educate her better! Get out of my way!


    As Xenon replied to the servant roughly, he knew that it was the girl who would be bothered, so he just loaded his gun without saying anything more. Carynne covered her ears again. And Xenon finished it off.


    Im a footman of the Hare manor, Borwen Lewis.


    Xenon.


    Ah


    Im just a huntsman, so you can be at ease.


    Please dont say that. On behalf of Milord, I would like to express my deep gratitude to you for saving the youngdy and for taking care of the situation. Please allow me to extend the honor of inviting you to the residence. You will be given a rightful reward.


    Shouldnt yourdy be the one saying that?


    At the following sarcastic remarks, Borwen hurriedly turned to Carynne.


    However, Carynne couldnt be found anywhere inside the circus tent.


    Donna! DONNA! Wheres Mdy?!


    Ah, really. Now its a missing child that needs to be looked for That youngdy is doing all sorts of bothersome things.


    Xenon shrugged and instead looked towards the ce where his master was standing. Xenon couldnt see him well, but his master, in turn, would see him clearly.


    He was a sniper with excellent eyes.

 Chapter 16

    Chapter 16


    Haa


    Carynne escaped and ran to a maze-like alley. How many times had she gone around theseplicated roads. If it wasnt now, it would be difficult to have another chance to move on her own, so she had to get away from there quickly. Her gasping breaths calmed down as she walked down the dark alleyway.


    She got far away from Raymond, and Borwen was distracted and would be held up by the crowd of people there, so he wouldn''t be on her trail. She couldnt miss this opportunity. Thered be no other chance to move independently in the near future. Would she be able to meet this person named Missus Deere alone?


    Maybe today will be different.


    After all, she also saw an animal she hadnt ever seen in a hundred years today.


    She thought about the huge animals demise. It was a mysterious beast that would appear only in old tales. After living in a warmer country from far away, the mysterious animal crushed all those people with just its feet, as though they were bugs being crushed to death in between pages of a book. Much like her.


    Urk.


    She was nauseous. It wasnt guilt, but she strangely felt bad. Camaraderie? Empathy? Carynne tried to put a word to it, but nothing really fit.


    Still, this day made her certain that many things have changed. Seeing things that she had never seen, people dying when they shouldnt yet. If Nancys absence had changed this much, perhaps this was an opportunity to find out more about the situation she was in.


    The tutors house was next to the hatters shop. When a new path was opened like today, she might be able to go to Missus Deeres house before the next sequence of events were set in stone.


    Ah.


    She stopped walking.


    If she were to go further, this was an alley where shed be in danger of sexual assault. But its not time yet, right? She looked at the moon. No, not yet. Its difficult to call this a life, but because she had lived through simr events, she could predict the future of the novel to some extent.


    Even if the plot gets mixed up here and there, if Carynne were to be in danger during this outing, Raymond woulde and save her. It was just the same as when shed go back again after she died.


    The lightest and mostmon plot progression was for Carynne to watch street performances with Borwen and Nancy. Then, someone would grope Carynnes ass, but Raymond catches this and stops it. If it was more serious, then in this alley


    Now arent you pretty? How old are you?


    It would start with flirting like this. Carynne watched the man recite clichd lines that she was already tired with. Its been a while since she came to this alley. Has it been twelve years? No, thirteen years?


    Dont do this.


    Dont do whaaat? What did I do?


    Carynne was pressed against a wall. There was a hand clutching her hair. His breath smelled disgusting. The mans right leg pressed against her thigh.


    Oh, youre in quite a nice condition, hm? You have good teeth and fair skin. Im sure the lower half is the same, right?


    I eat properly, sleep properly and also bathe properly.


    Look at this chick talking back.


    While snickering, another man blocked the alleyway so that Carynne wouldnt be able to run away.


    Hey, doesnt she look like a daughter of a rich family?


    Let me have a taste, too.


    The mans lower body was quite swollen. For some reason, she remembered the elephant from earlier.


    Pfft.


    Why, you like it?


    Dont you know what kind of situation youre in.


    An elephant, an elephant! Carynne couldnt hold back her mirth.


    He hehehe


    Looks like shes crazy.


    Who cares, its not like your wife isnt.


    Her clothes were torn. Carynne was alright with it considering that she was wearing her cheapest clothes.


    There was one iteration in the past when she went into the forest. It was a time when she was afraid to even meet Raymond. She entered the forest looking forward to a life without love, without meeting anyone, without dying.


    And after that, she never went to the forest again. The dangers of the forest were different than the dangers she faced in the city. Carynne had been stabbed by a wild boars tusk. And Raymond saved her.


    At that time, Carynne was just inwardly annoyed while thinking, Why is this person here and not in the city? Regardless of what she felt, Carynne eventually had to take a lot of painkillers and other medications, and she reached out to Raymond to die. Ultimately, she suffered a rpse with the stab wound, and she died.


    Ah, its annoying to even think about it. I cant believe this is happening. Next time, I wont go this way and just go to another ce.


    Next time? Its toote for that, yourdyship.


    The manughed as he heard Carynnes words. What did she mean, next time? The man had no intention to give her such an opportunity. But Carynne denied it. It seemed like she was talking to herself because her tone was so casual.


    Huh? Oh, no its not. Its not toote.


    At the unpredictable development of the conversation, the mans expression distorted as he tapped his head with a finger.


    Whats this crazy bitch saying?


    Hey, stop doing useless things and just go through with it. Ill have a go at her, too.


    When she thought about the time she had that wound, Carynnes anger rose.


    Think about it, Hans. Wouldnt you be angry if it was you?


    W-What? Why do you know my name


    No, no. Dont pay attention to that. Thats not important.


    What the hell, Hans, you


    You have a wife. I think she didnt care when you got shot and died? She remarried in a months time.


    What?


    I know right. Youre angry too, arent you? Now that I think about it, it makes me angry, too. Dun broke it off with me after seeing me kiss another guy. Sure, thats that, but if you learned some medical practices, shouldnt you be fair to everyone? But he was butthurt that I didnt marry him, so he didnt even treat me properly, I dunno. I would have died in the end anyway, but No, thats not important, anyway. Its better if theres less pus in the wound. First aid is important, so whats the use of Raymond bringing in the best medical staff? Thats when its already toote. That punk gave up on me right away just because I became another mans woman, haa.


    H-Hans, this bitch is really crazy


    Shut your mouth!


    <i>Thwack.</i>


    The mans fist met with Carynnes head.


    It hurts. But Carynne shook her head once, then looked up again. She couldnt push down the urge to talk.


    Ah, Thomas, your son will be a dishwasher in our house. But hes really bad at it. Last time, ah, what Im talking about right now is the previous life in this novel. Right now, your sons busy helping out the bakery owner. How pitiful. So I have my eye out for that kid. Soon enough, youll die from an STD.


    W-What? This fucker


    Her hair was grabbed.


    Hans, do you know how hard it is to maintain this hair? Its Nancys masterpiece.


    Die!


    Watch carefully.


    Carynne covered her ears. Because this time, she anticipated that gunshots would break out.


    Keugh.


    Ha, haa.


    Youre he


    Whats this?


    She didnt hear any gunshot. Carynnes head was bashed against a wall and she saw Thomas pull out a knife. Did she estimate the time wrong? Usually, after slipping away from Nancy, Carynne would get lost and end up here, but


    As expected, it was difficult to estimate the right time because Nancy was substituted with Donna. Nancy was always next to her, so it was easier to remember the timing if she just gauged Nancys actions. Carynne groaned.


    Uugh.


    She felt a terrible pain shooting up at her side. A knife was lodged there. Carynne was about to scream, but Hans covered her mouth. It hurts! I said it hurts! Will I die? Am I really going to die? This early? Really?

 Chapter 17

    Chapter 17


    Ha.. ahh


    He twisted the knife.


    <i>Bang!</i>


    Only then did she hear the sound of a gunshot. Its sote. Its already like this. Carynne felt a little relieved.


    They had raped me before, but they never tortured me. Its like this if their families were touched, and its amazing how people who had killed and raped other people still felt attached to their families. They didnt even love their families that much.


    Hey, what made you angry? Ah, youre already dead.


    Carynne watched the look behind Hans eyes loosen. It was an insignificant death for an insignificant character. He died just as he lived, like an insect.


    Hans, you beat your wife every day and raped her like this. Still, did it feel like you were betrayed when you heard that shell remarry? Is that why you were angry? Do you hate hearing about your wifes life after you died? This future that you cant see? Or no, were you just offended? But I didnt want to do it with you. You have bad breath.


    And when Carynne saw the food stuck in Hans teeth, she closed her eyes in disgust. Carynne closed her eyes and tried to recall pleasant things. What would be good? She saw an elephant this time. Its the first time she saw one in the flesh.


    Hey, maybe I have a talent as an animal trainer. That would be fun.


    Carynne thought about the elephant approaching her. In the end, she didnt know if the elephant would have harmed her or not. In this life, she couldnt predict how the elephant would affect this life.


    However, what she was certain was Carynne herself would be vulnerable to danger this time. Ise would have asked, in a letter to Raymond, for him to meet her, but he would refuse at first. Though, as expected, he would secretlye here because he was worried.


    Now that this series of events had been faithfully gone through, its possible for Carynne to expect danger today after quarreling with the coachman and looking around with Borwen and Nancy. But this time it was with Donna and not Nancy.


    Unlike Nancy, who liked music, the very curious Donna insisted on watching the circus. So now, its expected that the danger would ur during or after the circus.


    And the result was that both during and after were filled with danger. Carynne didnt expect it would be this much.


    Greaterpared to meeting Raymond, side effects like these happened whenever Carynne took action. After being rescued for the first time at the circus, she wondered if she should have ended todays schedule there. She rushed into it too much. Still, she did what she needed to do, and that was to have a face-to-face encounter with Raymond.


    Ow.


    My side was painful. She should avoid choosing the circus route next time. Still, she wanted to touch the nose, so as expected, she had lingering regrets. And as expected, excessive greed would hurt herself.


    She wanted to secretly take a look into the person named Missus Deere, too, but she didnt know that the plot would be this twisted. Still, what a marvelous sight this was. If she could continue seeing things like this, she thought that it would be alright to die more than a few times. It felt like she could hold out more.


    Are you alright?


    Carynne closed her eyes. She didnt want to see him now, this man who was so familiar to her.


    I dont believe Ive seen someone like you in the night police force. You dont even look like a huntsman.


    Reasonable skepticism is an aristocrats responsibility, but I do not wish to rmend it in this situation.


    Closing her torn clothes, Carynne tried to open her eyes and give him a suspicious look. As if she was truly suspicious of him, she tried to look at him as though he wasnt a man shes known for one hundred years. But because she got stabbed at the side with a knife, childishly, she wanted to cling onto him andin to him as though they were an old couple. Youre toote. Youre just too much.


    Not conscious of it, tears streamed out of her eyes even if she wasnt acting. Getting stabbed hurts. Its hard to breathe.


    As you can see, my blood isnt blue enough for me to be called an aristocrat. Thank you for sav ing me. But as much as you saw what happened in my situation huk, huuk, ugh Im not in a good condi ugh


    Raymond pressed a hand against her side to stop the bleeding. Reaching out, he patted Carynnes back to calm her panting breaths.


    He hated women who cried, but it was natural for him to take care of someone whos injured because he was a soldier. He pressed down as he soothed her. While doing so, it was surprising that he wasforting a young woman and not a soldier under hismand, but he couldnt take his hands off her.


    My subordinate will be here soon, and he has a hemostatic drug. The Hare familys carriage has also been called.


    You know who I am.


    I was going to visit unofficially. But it couldnt be helped. I am Raymond Saytes. While I am themanding officer of the Chivalric Order of the Raven, my visit to this ce is purely out of personal interest.


    Being a noble was truly troublesome. She was crying from pain, and while asking if she was alright, a doctor should be called, but in the end, here it waseven in his situation, an inquiry about each others position, name, and purpose of visit wasmenced. This annoyance, this anguish, this tediousness. Carynne wanted to let go of everything.


    Miss Hare, did you have fun on your outing today?


    When I got stabbed by a knife?


    I apologize. That isnt what I meant. Its difficult for me to console someone else because Im not good with words.


    Raymond, a knight, became like a fool only in front of Carynne Hare. Of course, this was only natural. Carynne sighed. Repetitive lines werent any fun. She knew he was just trying to console and soothe her, but if she could, she wanted to get a good grip on that blond hair of his and just <i>pull</i>.


    While it was a purposeless outing, Id been stuck inside for about ten years without going on an adventure.


    And Carynne had no choice but to utter such terrible words.


    But its nice that I went out.


    Right. What did you enjoy the most?


    I saw an elephant.


    Alright.


    It was wonderful, so I liked it.


    Thats a relief.


    She saw an animal she had never seen before. If only for that experience, she could die countless times again. Whats a lifepared to interesting things.


    Your family is very worried. Lets head back.


    Yes, alright. Its a virtue to shareughter, but its out of line to share worries.


    Raymond slipped his other arm under her legs to lift her up, still pressing her side with one hand. Inside the dress made of rough fabric, rich and expensiveces fell beautifully into shape.


    As Carynne was wrapped in such a picturesque beauty, Raymond lifted her up and headed to the carriage. Like a groom carrying his beloved bride, he led her down the path, as though promising a bright new future ahead.


    Ha.


    Although there never was a future with him in all these one hundred years, it sure looked like it anyway.


    It was futile to trust him. Even so, there was a time when she wanted to keep relying on him.


    Their eyes met.


    Beneath the moonlight, his blond hair seemed to be shining like pure molten gold, and his two irises gleamed with a peculiar brilliance to them as well.


    His stride was dignified and he did not stagger even with Carynne in his arms, as though she was as light as a water bottle in ones hand. Looking at him with a strange expression, Carynne closed her eyes as though she had fainted.


    At this moment, he had fallen for her.


    And also at this moment, all Carynne wanted was for her favoritece not to be torn.


    <i> fun fact: the Korean word for raven has the word devil in it, so i guess its like a pun because Raymonds nickname is the golden devil</i>

 Chapter 18

    Chapter 18


    God, will you finally spend some time with that whining fiance of yours again, sir?


    It turned out that way.


    Raymond replied with an unreadable expression. He didnt want toe here that much in the first ce and he didnt look too kindly at Verdic Evans conduct, so Xenon couldnt understand why he went all the way here.


    Regardless of the copse to ruin of his family, Raymond was born as a noble, so never revealed his weak side to his subordinates. That side of him made Xenon a little dismayed for a while.


    But soon after, he would wonder if this young knight had any such weaknesses, and rather than harboring any feelings like jealousy towards him, he decided to regard Raymond as someone innately blessed by the gods. If Xenon was to set aside his own personal opinion, Raymond was a pretty goodno, he was a <i>damn</i> good boss.


    Raymonds abilities were ster. And he was also generous in giving and fair in judgment. He was a knight who did not practice chivalry as defined by aristocracy, but rather, he imbibed the ideal values that themon people wanted.


    He was a sniper.


    Xenon was Raymonds squire, but its rare for a squire like Xenon to be working so closely with a knight, and when Raymond would bring him water at a close distance, he still felt reluctant. Whenever Raymond went home, he would directly distribute water and some nourishment for the tired knights, and he tended to perform his duties alone.


    The upation of a sniper wasnt exactly a noblemans job. Killing others while hiding oneself was considered to be disgraceful not only by the enemy but also by the aristocrats in their home country.


    Dirty work. What the aristocrats involved themselves in during the war was a battle of wits and strategies, and with only words to be wielded, they could ughter numerous soldiers and take over countless assets.


    On the other hand, Raymond just acted alone during the war, lying down on the ground. On the second day, when he crawled towards the enemy camp and shot the neck of Count Githdins first son, everyone just criticized him. That guy was a celebrity. He was a famousposer, and of course, though it wasnt for his wife, he went to war for ady.


    The very next day, everyone was rendered silent when the enraged counts head was shot. A monthter, 300 enemy soldiers met their demise and everyone became crazy with excitement.


    Six barons and countless knights were killed. Word went around that he had clearly signed a contract with a devil, and the nickname attributed to him was mixed with legend and envy.


    The marksman with magic bullets.


    In the first war he fought, this was the nickname he received.


    He had good eyes. His character, his patience and his stamina were also all great, but his eyesight was especially phenomenal to Xenon, being the former hunter that he was. Raymonds eyesight wasparable to a hawks in the sky.


    He didnt even use a scope, saying that there was a risk of getting caught if light was reflected off it. When he heard that there was a problem in the circus, even while people poured out of the tent, he immediately ran inside to settle the situation.


    Xenon felt proud that the person who was the pinnacle of nobility was the one he was serving.


    H Mdy, please open your eyes.


    Thats why Xenon was flustered to see him do something quite terrible to the childish youngdy of the Hare family. Xenon was sure that he saw it, but he couldnt believe she was in this state.


    Hnngh It was my fault.


    Donna, be quiet.


    The girl lying inside the rattling carriage was tremendously pale. And with an expression that Xenon had never seen before on Raymond, the knight was beside her while blocking the bleeding at her side.


    On the other side of the carriage, an attendant was anxiously praying with his hands sped together. The maid was holding Lady Hares hand with a teary face.


    Now that the noble youngdy had be like that, they must be worried about the punishment that would befall them. Xenon clicked his tongue and sympathized with them. Because of the immature girl, even Sir Raymond would be roped into this.


    The fact that they were quite restless seemed to mean that they had a close rtionship, but Xenon wasnt keen about that because rtionships between superiors and subordinates wereplicated. What hes focused on and should care about was, like the other servants, was Raymond, the knight he was serving.


    Excuse me, sir. Didnt you say that you werent going to see Lady Ise?


    Yes, thats right.


    After this, Xenon couldnt even follow up with the question, Then why are you going there? It could be that he really just wanted toe. Maybe he came to soothe his fiances anxiety. Or maybe he was interested in the country where war was taking ce, here over the mountain range.


    Or perhaps it could also be to meet Verdics demandshe was a huge source of funds after all. Or, to see the face of Enids daughter, who was renowned for her beauty.


    Xenon was surprised to see that she was younger than he imagined, but she was really Enids daughter. She looked even more beautiful than that. Since its like this, Xenons superior was a man just like any other, so hed tend to like her. His predilection for beauty was only natural.


    It was ufortable to be with an injured person inside a carriage. Xenon wanted to ask Raymond something, but he couldnt bring it up. He had many other questions, but even if they were alone, Xenon still wouldnt be able to ask them.


    Huu


    Mdy, are you alright? asked the maid.


    No.


    Uh hng


    It didnt go in deep because of the corset, so youll be fine, Raymond said.


    Then shouldnt we untie it first? Raymond suggested.


    And Carynne replied, Oh my, how sneaky.


    M-Mdy! the maid eximed.


    Its a joke. Since were almost there, just go and uugh.


    The attendants face turned white.


    D-Didnt you say that Mdy would be alright?


    What I meant is that the injurys not a life-threatening one. Even a papercut stings.


    Seeing Raymond trying to calm Borwen down, Carynne was speechless.


    Wow, as expected, youre a knight. If its you, a stab like this is just nothing ha, haa.


    I dont mean to be sarcastic. I only mean to say that outside a critical condition, the pain would be strong.


    I wasnt being sarcastic either. Forgive me for not making any sense because Im in pain


    Please stay still.


    Xenon couldnt bear the light conversation flowing between them. He had no doubt about his duty as a squire. However, his judgment andprehension as a hunter couldnt be held back. Even if he tried to mention his superiors fiance, the superior in question didnt respond.


    Raymond blocked the girls bleeding side andforted her moderately. In turn, the girlforted her servants and gave her thanks and joked around with the knight after shed been stabbed by an assant.


    The twos lovely and flexible demeanor seemed to be something out of a theatre y, and they exuded a subtly peaceful atmosphere despite being in the middle of an emergency.


    They were like the noblewoman and knight Xenon heard about when he was young. Even the maid next to him admired them, like this scene was a well-written love story on a stage.


    But Xenon was sure that Raymond must have been watching her ever since the girl snuck out. When he said that he had to find a girl, he went up to a tall building, looked around in all directions and checked every location. Even within a distance that Xenon could see, Lady Hare was found cornered by two men.


    God, what a scene that was. Xenon was already about to spring into a run, swearing under his breath, but when he saw his masters silhouette, he thought that he wouldnt need to rush down after all. It looked like he didnt need to save her. He raised his gun and held his breath.


    Two shots rang out.


    Sir Raymond also had no choice but to prioritize the life of a noble houses daughter rather than the lives of two assants in a back alley. If Xenon stopped it himself, it would end with his death, but when he saw Raymond solving it, his mouth tasted bitter.


    That attitude was so like an aristocrat. Many people would think that he was a true knight. If anyone dared to do that, hed be told that he deserved to die.


    As expected, he should follow behind his master, who ran forward first. Though Xenon had a sinking feeling, the situation was already resolved.


    Raymond didnt order Xenon to shoot his gun, but instead made Xenon approach the girl to bring her back.


    Hu, what. My position is like this. You guys also shouldnt hold a grudge, so huh?


    Xenon grumbled that it couldnt be helped while he tried to gather the dead bodies, but as he was doing so, he freaked out when he saw the state that thedy, who Raymond ordered him to fetch, was in.


    His master had deliberately let the girl get hurt.

 Chapter 19: An uncomfortable dinner

    Chapter 19: An ufortable dinner


    <b> 03. An ufortable dinner</b>


    Repeated nagging for about 100 years was just boring.


    Standing next to Donna, Helen, the housekeeper, was angry this morning and nagged with a stern voice. At around this hour, its already the time to gather the maids and delegate their tasks for the day. She seemed very angry. It was obvious why, considering what happenedst night and considering Donnas pale-white face and swollen eyes.


    Mdy cant go out as you please again.


    Yeah.


    Its already clear that Donna isnt good enough to serve Mdy, so Ill have to think about who could rece her.


    Ohh


    When it was Nancy, only Carynne was scolded. Carynne rubbed her side, wondering if it was because of the age difference, as expected. Its not so pleasant to hear a middle-aged womans voice rather than a young girls voice so early in the morning.


    While looking at her throbbing side, Carynne felt that it was fortunate she got proper treatment this time. She had a stray thought that it would be better to maintain a good rtionship with Dun until she would get hurt again in the future.


    After removing her negligee and checking the wounded area, just as Raymond said, she wasnt stabbed deeply. Even so, she still had to get two stitches for it. Her forehead was already torn open and her side was sewn up like this. She wondered how shed be in a years time.


    That corset was definitely a whale bone corset. Im d I bought it.


    Mdy.


    Dont me me too much. I didnt even get <i>that</i> hurt.


    There were many casualties in the circus. If it werent for Sir Raymond, you could have died. No, Im sure that you would have died.


    It was difficult for her to make excuses. Helen was the highest ranking person among the female employees because she was the housekeeper, so that means she was in charge of the households internal affairs in ce of the young Carynne.


    Bowen was a man, so he wasnt here to listen to all of this since he wasnt under Helens jurisdiction. But here, Helen said that because of Donnas immature behavior, the maids sry would be cut half for a month and shed go back to being aundry maid.


    I dont want that.


    Above all, there were few other maids who were as loose-lipped, lively and ident-prone as Donna. She was so attractive to Carynne that she didnt want to give the maid up.


    It was my fault, so just let Donna continue working.


    Mdy.


    Helen responded firmly. Donnas eyes glistened.


    I know that youre attached to her because you dont have that many peers right now, but this is not wise.


    What are you, thedy of the house? Carynne couldnt even drink her morning tea because of all the nagging. Carynne liked herself a good bnce of good and evil in a character, but she didnt like Helen very much.


    Helen acted as though she was the manors mistress, just like other housekeepers in other houses where the madam of the house was powerless. And so, she tried to control Carynne like she was a child.


    It wasnt a pleasant experience for Carynne to see how Helen was mistaking this as something of a moral right or her duty. Good people were lovely, evil people were interestinghowever, humans who thought that they were <i>right</i> just made her bored and irritated. Thats why shed been avoiding meeting Helen as much as possible.


    Helen.


    Carynne wanted to snap at the woman and tell her she was being impudent, but she was restraining herself. Housekeepers like Helen had authority. How many servants would listen to a seventeen-year-old nobledy who says whatever she wants to say. Carynne recalled a distant past.


    There was a time when she tried acting like the madam of the house. She fasted, though it was inconvenient, and got the woman kicked out. But Carynne soon regretted it. There were so many servants to manage and so many tasks toplete. It was only in fairy tales that everything worked out just because youre the daughter of the territorys lord.


    To manage a household, all servants should be gathered everyday at dawn to review what tasks there were to do, andter at night, they needed to be checked. Carynne had to do everythingounting, weing guests, and general management.


    Helen was reced with Nancy, but Nancy was weak-minded and she barely managed because she was illiterate, so it wasnt possible for them to handle that kind of work.


    Thats not possible, Helen replied.


    Please.


    Useful people needed to be pacified, coaxed and badgered.


    But its inconvenient to suddenly have someone rece her Will youe y with me, Helen?


    I have a lot of work to do.


    Thats exactly it. Because youre not even my attendant, Helen.


    Its lonesome. She expressed intimacy and kicked it up a notch. Whenever Carynne pretended to be upset, Helens resolve would weaken. Just as expected, Helen was really thinking of herself as Carynnes biological mother.


    You cant do that again.


    Yes, yes. I wont.


    Even so, just how many things started to go wrong because of Nancy


    Whens Nancying back?


    You dont know? Nancy had quit. She said she couldnt stand it. I knew it, this couldnt be helped because she was born a wanderer.


    Thats how it was dealt with? Nancy went on vacation, but she eventually quit because work was too hard.


    Carynne lowered her teacup. Helen brought over a brush. Brushing Carynnes hair wasnt something Helen, a housekeeper, would do, but the younger woman asked anyway.


    Youre going to do it, Helen?


    When I was younger, I was ady-in-waiting in charge of young noblewomens clothes. I cant leave this to Donna on a day like this. It would have been better if Nancy was here.


    What day is it today?


    Its Sir Raymonds first day here. You have to be quiet, Mdy. Milord and Mister Evans will be there.


    Ah.


    You should look pretty, right?


    That meant that it would take an hour to put on makeup and three hours to get her hair done. Usually, all of them would be done by Nancy, or if Nancy wasnt there, it would be Sera.


    Having another hairdressers hand on her was also pleasant. Carynne was much too old to whine and say, I dont want to do this kind of thing!


    Still, this is too excessive.


    What is?


    The rose oil, or even this outfit?


    Its still not that luxuriouspared to Miss Evans. You have to look the part so that you wont be brought to shame, right?


    Which here was more shameful, trying too hard while overdressing with high-quality clothes or wearing inexpensive clothes amongst people who <i>would </i>be wearing high-quality clothes? The general consensus would be that thetter was more shameful, but this was between people who didnt want to lose face.


    While thinking that there was such a thing as basic courtesy, amongst those with higher standards than others, the lines between courtesy, frugality and luxury would start to blur. And Carynne just focused on other things rather than weighing the scales between them.


    The most important thing was the ending of the novel and the male leads taste.


    Raymonds taste was important. Carynnes judgement on value was not very important.


    Is Father making you do this?


    No.


    As Helens eyes scrunched up, a masseuse entered. She took off Carynnes clothes with skilled hands andy her down on the wooden bed. Her entire body was wiped with a piece of cloth that was soaked with rose water.


    Ugh.


    The wound still hurt, so Carynne groaned. Eventually, Helen stopped the masseuse from wiping Carynnes body and spoke.


    Taking a bath might be too much for you.


    Right?


    Then it should be enough to just apply scented oil.


    The wound would likely open again.


    With Carynnes hair pulled back, Donna washed her scalp and hair with water and applied scented oils again while her hair was up.


    Since youre good at handlingundry, youre good at washing hair, too, huh?


    Hehe.


    Is there really a reason for me to look good in front of Sir Raymond?


    There is! First,pared to Ise to Miss Evans, Mdy is much more beautiful, so it will be a proud moment. Second what else


    What else?


    Um


    To earn money. Carynne could hear Helen and the masseuse chuckling. Donna didnt answer in the end, but considering theughter between that silence, Carynne already knew.


    Dun was an unwee incumbent fief lord. Hes someone who didnt suit the beautifuldy. Helen wanted Carynne to look good in front of Raymond so openly.


    Its not that she wouldnt think of Dun as Carynnes husband, its just that she thought of him as a spare who wasnt good enough for Carynne.


    Carynne wasnt offended by this arrogance. She didnt feelpelled to defend or foster animosity towards Dun.


    Rather, she had the urge to spoil the mood.

 Chapter 20

    Chapter 20


    Carynne wanted to tell the people who undermined Dun this: Even though that guys like that, hes somehow good enough at night. The size is fine, and his endurance, well The motion of the ocean isnt there, but his priests robes are quite arousing, I guess?


    If she was actually going to say this, she wondered how they would react. But she had to endure the urge. She wanted to stir the pot, but she had to endure.


    This impulse was akin to wanting to touch a wasps nest. Even though she knew it was dangerous, Carynne felt the undeniable urge to talk.


    Dun is


    W-Wouldnt it be better tother this on top?


    AH! Lord Dun?


    <i>Tadadak.</i>


    There was a smallmotion. Cant he at least be a gentleman. Taken aback by Duns sudden visit, Donna almost fell over while Helen hid her surprise by keeping her expression nk. The masseuse, on the other hand, quickly covered Carynne with a cloth and stepped back.


    Carynne was somehow a little relieved. Before impulse overtook to open her lips, the uninvited guest came in and cut off her stray thoughts. If he hadnte in, would she have said it? If she had, what would have happened?


    Why are you here?


    Your i-injury


    I was already treated.


    Y-You cant apply oil or water on it.


    Did youe here only to say that?


    No, the  conflict of emotions  here was as per usual. However this time, Dun seemed to want Carynne to be more obsessed with him, so he should be moderately coaxed, else hed be twisted.


    Im not ming you. Im really just asking.


    Im here to check if its infected to a degree.


    At least whenever he talked about work, he stuttered less. As Carynnes negligee was swept aside, her injury was disinfected with a soaked cotton ball. When the scent of alcohol mixed with the rose fragrance, Carynne had the intense desire to drink.


    Can I drink some whiskey tonight?


    Crazy.


    She knew that the best liquor would be brought out today. With this thought, Carynne felt despondent. The whiskey she had in mind had been brewed over sixty years ago and was made in the Hare territory. There were only about seventy bottles of it.


    Could she enjoy its taste this time? Damn Hans, Ill lop off your head and drown it in alcohol.


    Even a ss of ros wine should be fine, right?


    Not even beer diluted by water.


    Damn.


    He was being unnecessarily careful. Carynne clicked her tongue, deciding to sneak some and drink it secretly at night.


    Then can you leave now?


    W-What.


    Hm? Im in the middle of a massage.


    This This is an expensive scented oil You dont care about your inner character at all, youre just concerned with other things.


    There are many important guests. Its only manners.


    T-To this extent If its just me visiting, you d-dont do this. Your hair


    Dun didnt seem to like seeing Carynne like this. What he said was true, though it wasnt for the purpose that he was thinking. Even so, Carynne felt that it was a bit absurd for Dun to be acting this way.


    He was being particrly more annoying in this life. Was it a mistake that she slept with him?


    Sir Raymond Saytes hails from a barony, and he is close to Verdic Evans. Above all, hes the man who saved me. Wouldnt it be natural to try to look good?


    To this extent Y-Youve never done that. You already


    With twitching lips, he continued to criticize Carynne.


    Your morals


    Hey, you ah.


    While its like this, perhaps he was trying to grab her by the ankle? Carynne red at Dun.


    She felt that it was unfair. Why was it that when men lose their virginity, it wasnt a w for them? It would be fairer if men got hurt in that ce every time they did it.


    Carynne red at Dun as though shed chew him out. At this, Helen quickly rose to her feet and implored Dun.


    Lord Dun, there is not enough time. We need to finish Lady Carynnes preparations.


    Ri ght now, its mor, ning though?


    Women are different from men.


    Ha, you w-waste your time with useless things, t-that is nothing but vanity.


    With those words, the expressions of all the women in the room became menacing. What do <i>you </i>know? How dare.


    That kind of vanity, would <i>you</i> like to try it?


    U, seless I shall be praying until evening


    Shut it.


    Carynne made a gesture of pinching over her lips to shut him up, then she called the masseuse.


    Raymond was surely going to be absolutely handsome today, but if hed be a mere stone next to a diamond, shouldnt the soil on it be removed at least? Helen, Donna and the masseuse were nervous as they approached Dun.


    After quite a while, the three women were left exhausted as they stepped back.


    Dun, you really dont go beyond expectations, huh.


    Usually, youd have be a handsome man by now, but um I dont know, something like that?


    Helen, Donna and the masseuse could only be frustrated, and Carynne was feeling bitter. It was just enough that the soil was brushed away. Thats as far as she could expect from Dun.


    A-A persons worth isnt judged by their outward appearance.


    Then, are you worth more than how you appear? Nothing about him could hold a candle to Raymond, be it personality, power and knowledge.


    But instead of speaking up about it, Carynne smiled with her eyes and said, Its my turn now, please get out of the way, and left her body to the three women.


    And there, Dun watched the already pretty girl turn into an astounding beauty.


    * * *


    Ise gritted her teeth audibly.


    I dont like that either! Bring something else! I need a dress that would make myplexion look brighter!


    What about this ivory fabric, Miss?


    Its too dull! Is this a <i>joke?</i>


    No.


    Coming from the next room over, Verdic knocked, although it wasnt heard. Ise insisted on staying next door to Verdic because she had nightmares, but her father also felt very tortured by this.


    Ise, stop this now.


    Even <i>youre</i> doing this to me, Father?


    What did I


    Hiic


    At Verdics sigh, Ise burst into tears. Seeing this, Verdic could already feel his fatigue rushing in at once.


    Haa.


    Even the Evansdy-in-waiting, who had been with them for the longest time, was also of no help. She originally was this selfish since she was raised as a precious child, but it wasnt usually to this extent. Aftering to this ce, it seemed like she couldnt control her emotions.


    The thought of his daughter depending entirely on the knight induced a headache. Before the knight would change his mind, Verdic would have to hasten their engagement.


    It was already too much to handle the knight because he was so talented, but it was even worse of a headache when his daughter was acting as though she had mncholy on top of it all.


    Ise.


    Yes.


    Whats the problem?


    Raymond saved Lady Hare.


    Right, he is an exemry knight.


    She shes nngh shes prettier than me.


    And what of it?


    What do I do if Sir Raymond falls in love with that girl?


    If you put it that way, then Sir Raymond would have set up a harem of women by now. Ah, and men, too.


    Father!


    Do you remember when you got engaged?


    When I was five.


    Do you think a child at that age could talk about serious feelings?


    What do you mean?


    Im telling you to stop thinking that life is a fairytale. With me and your mother, too, I only met her once before we got married. Catherine Hare was also engaged to Dun Roid at that age. So did you, so did Sir Raymond, and me and Lord Hare. Marrying for love is what idlers on the streets sing about. For people like us, lovees after marriage.


    I fell in love with Sir Raymond at first sight!


    You also fell in love at first sight with the blue diamond ne you received during yourst birthday.


    Father.


    Be reasonable. Youre being too emotional right now. Its difficult to imagine that he would suddenly break off his engagement with you and marry someone elses fiance.


    <i>But Father. </i>Her father thought that everyone else would also move ording to their self-interest and by the course of rationality. But was that the case? Was that true?


    Would Raymond marry her ording to his best interests and sire children with her because it was an obligation? Would she need to marry him to present their child to her father, a grandson of his that would have thest name of a noble?


    The blue dress is the best one.


    Mdy, please raise your arms.


    Ise was speechless. She had an obligation. As she was born with the name of Evans, she must carry her duties and must repay her father for feeding her, giving her a ce to sleep in, and providing the clothes on her back. Ise wore the blue dress that she disliked the most.


    Do you still have nightmares?


    Sometimes.


    What kind of nightmares do you have?


    Ise felt the stream of lighting in from the window.


    A nightmare with a dead body.


    Why, is it a dream with your mother or even me dying? You know that people are bound to pass on


    No, thats not it.


    Then tell me.


    She had to keep talking. While her father was still listening.


    Here, the Hare households maid. Its a nightmare where I keep seeing that ck maids dead body.


    Was there a maid like that here?


    She went on a vacation during the second day we arrived. Her corpse keeps appearing in my dreams.


    Then whats worrying you? Wouldnt that ridiculous nightmare end the moment that maid is called and you see her in front of you alive? Dont tell me youre a prophet.


    No, Im not


    She gulped.


    Shes been on vacation since that day.


    As he was frowning while looking over his daughters outfit, Verdic raised his head for the first time and expressed his wonder.


    What? Its been a while since we came here


    Father. I havent seen her since Ive started having these nightmares.


    Why did the ck maid disappear after that? If seeing that dead body was a mere hallucination, shouldnt the maid have shown herself the next day? Ise couldnt stop trembling.


    That night, the scene she saw in that room came to mind. The face of the maid who had her head separated from her body. It was too clear of an image.


    It was so terrifying.

 Chapter 21

    Chapter 21


    The formal dinner was ufortable from the very start.


    Lord Raymond, gourmet food is also definitely another source of enjoyment. What do you think of this splendid wine from the abbey?


    Ise said this as she regarded the glistening pink foie gras and the beautiful color of the ros wine.


    Reverend Dun must know better than I do about that.


    Raymond passed her off smoothly.


    Im not sure.


    While holding a ss of wine, Dun barely swallowed down a sip and answered.


    This almost felt like torture for Dun. Even before a few words were exchanged, he felt so intimidated that his shoulders cowered down.


    As Dun continued to stammer, Raymonds expression became strange. At that, Raymond no longer passed off the conversation towards Dun because Duns stutter was so bad today that everyone listening to him speak felt ufortable.


    A brief silencemenced, but the fief lord broke this silence and spoke to Carynne.


    Carynne, are you doing alright with your injury?


    Yes. Thank you for asking, Father. It isnt much of a wound.


    Its all thanks to Sir Raymond.


    Raymond responded, his eyes curved.


    Even so, I am ashamed that I couldnt stop it on time, Your Lordship.


    I express my deep gratitude, Sir Knight.


    Shining like a blooming violet, Carynnes eyes also smiled as she looked at Raymond, and he smiled back at her. Seeing this, Ise gritted her teeth and spoke up.


    So, what do you think, Reverend Dun?


    Wh, at do you mean?


    Ooh, that confidence. That shamelessness.


    As Carynne admired Ises willfulness once more, she asked for a ss of water instead of an aperitif.


    Can they not shut up so that the next course could be served? Why did todays meal have to be three hours long. It was a wonder how Ise was wearing those high heels under the dinner table and enduring it all rather than picking up those shoes and using them to hit something.


    Apart from that, while having a taste of Verdics ambition, perhaps Ise was glum after noticing Raymonds favor. And during all this, Carynne couldnt even drink any liquor.


    Carynne chewed on a bite of goose liver and waited for the conversation to move on. If anything, the whiff of mushroom on the sauce was quite good.


    I was curious about your opinion on gourmet food and what rtion it has to vices.


    Instead of Dun, the fief lord lowered his knife and answered.


    Not being able to control oneself is a sin, however its difficult to justify gourmet food in itself as one. Young Miss Evans, if thats how you put it, do you suppose that <i>we</i>mit this sin every day?


    Listening to the lords response, who spoke instead of Dun, Ise paused for a moment, but she soon replied.


    Isnt the excess of gourmet food in itself a sin? Im merely curious. Gourmet food gives us great pleasure, but isnt moderation necessary?


    Then the matter lies in what could be considered as an excess. It sounds like youre saying that the meal were having is excessive, but on what grounds do you say this?


    The most certain thing is, shouldnt it be that the sovereign must always think of his subjects?


    The old lords brows slightly twitched at the obvious jab of the young woman, but that was all. It would be difficult to scold the girl in front of her father. Meanwhile, even the said father was smiling at his daughters demeanor.


    Hm, then Miss Ise, are you saying that after seeing todays meal, do you believe that I dont think of my people?


    This dinner was something he paid attention to quite a bit. It was an even morevish mealpared to what they had during his one and only daughters birthday party.


    Tomemorate the deal with Verdic, this was definitely an extravagant meal. Even as only appetizers and soup had since been served, it was clear that this was the case.


    There were several appetizers. In addition to the foie gras, there was also ravioli with chives and scallions, which was apanied by a sauce with hints of mint and garlic, and in addition, there was some caviar with sea salt.


    The garnish was a mix of mashed eggs, parsley and onions, then there was a sweet pumpkin dish sprinkled with a little sugar and salt. All with excellent texture, they were presented magnificently as well.


    When thinking how the Evans family would have weed Raymond, this wasparatively simple. But considering what they normally ate in the Hare household, this was an unparalleledvish meal. Thats what Ise was pointing out.


    Yes.


    Ha.


    Even with how the lord couldnt hide his displeasure with his reaction, Ise continued to speak resolutely.


    When visiting themercial area that were trying to improve through this project, I saw how miserable the condition of it was. Not only with hygiene but also the peoples nutrition. Because of that, I thought that theres a need for a systematic reform.


    Huh. Do you have any basis for what youre saying?


    Of course. Ive done some research while looking over the documents because I hadnt been able to go out as I was unwell. Im presenting the conclusions Ive gleaned from doing so.


    Lord Hares expression slightly hardened, but he soon directed his words away from the bold girl and towards her father.


    Verdic, your daughter is something else.


    Haha, Your Lordship, please kindly let it slide. My youngest daughter is not only pretty, but shes also a knowledgeable and curious individual.


    But who here didnt know?


    That insolence of hers.


    Carynne quietly lifted her ss and had it refilled with water. Ise usually enjoyed living while pretending to have an empty mind, hoping to just be a bright, cheerful girl.


    However, because she wanted to look good in front of Raymond, this attitude would turn one-eighty.


    The mask of a pure girl wouldnt do since the beautiful Carynne was right here. She and Raymond even had a romantic happenstance, so Ise would bepared side by side with the other girl. If thats the case, then it would be better to show off the virtue of a wife.


    With Raymond being a soldier, hed be away often, so she wanted to show how suitable she was for the role of thedy of the house. Even if she seemed rude here, she intended to show that at least herpetence was sufficienteven if she wouldnt be good enough to be his cherished lover.


    But that wasnt what suited Raymond.


    Carynne could feel Raymonds sidelong nce at her.


    Ah, this time, too.


    While Verdic and Ise were used to weighing the scales when it came to marriage, Carynne also knew to some extent that this was a matter of course. Amongst countless people, who there would scoff at the idea of living ones life ording to ones standards? Even fairy tales these days wouldnt depict a princess falling in love with a stableman.


    The Evans family needed to think about these things a bit more simply.


    Raymond was, firstly, a noble, and he was very capable and was a smooth talker, and on the other hand, Verdic was not. Raymond wasnt a merchant like him who was good at weighing gains and losses. It was difficult to imagine, just by looking at his beautiful countenance, that this young man whos still in his twenties had faced any horrors in his life.


    Meanwhile, Carynne wasnt even the daughter of a mere stableman but a quasi-noble, and she was more than twice as beautiful as Ise. Also, Raymond was scheduled to seed as the next baron. So if you look at it this way, actually, all Ise could offer was money.


    Haa.


    Carynne let out a small sigh and set down her utensils.


    Seeing her father be subjected to shame like this, Carynne became upset.


    She looked at Ise and told her.


    I didnt know that <i>you </i>consider self-restraint to be a virtue.


    With a slightly appalled expression as she stared at Ises essories, Carynne said so. At this, Ise smiled and hit Carynnes arm.


    Oh my, Carryne, dont be like that. Im not saying that you should live like priests, for example, or to restrain yourself unconditionally. Moderate spending and adherence to culture is also necessary. My dresses and essories could never be considered excessive. Dont you think so, Lord Raymond?


    Miss Ise. My older brother hasnt taught me much, but Ive learned one thing for surenot to interfere with a womans spending.


    Iseughed loudly.


    Of course, if youre the husband, you have the right to interfere.


    And soon stoppedughing.


    I dont me you, Miss Evans. Mister Verdic Evans is a generous gentleman to his family.


    Yes.


    Of course, Sir Raymond. Im always generous to my family.


    Verdic said this with his arms exaggeratedly open, tacitly implying that once Raymond became part of his family, this much was nothing.


    Even so, Im d.


    Carynne interjected.


    I understand where youreing from right now, Miss Ise. Its probably because our households meal is much too great for you to behold that youve said that. Im d that youre enjoying it.


    Ise lifted a ss of water. Her pupils were shaking with a hint of anger.


    <i>Clink.</i>


    Ise?


    Borwen.


    Ah, I apo I apologize, gosh.


    Ise dropped her ss of water. She was given another full cup once more, and after she picked this up, she turned to Carynne.


    Im not saying that you must restrain yourself unconditionally. I mentioned it already, but moderate spending is still necessary. Its just.. Its just that Im worried that this meal could be considered a sin because its just so good Um, Lord Raymond, what do you think?


    Her bravado suddenly dwindled. Raymond replied smoothly, as expected.


    Im enjoying myself, truly. Because of the nature of my work, all kinds of food feel like a luxury to me. After quivering in between boulders for two days while thinking that bullets woulde flying at me, Im grateful enough for everything.


    Carynne felt a piercing gaze stabbing at her. She looked at Ise. Her pupils were shaking.


    Ise lifted her ss and took a sip.


    Water inside a ss should be gulped down, after all.


    <i>t/n: Raymond is generally addressed as  or Sir due to him being a knight, but hes sometimes addressed as , which roughly trantes to Lord, depending on whos speaking to him.</i>

 Chapter 22

    Chapter 22


    When the main course arrived, there was a subtle change in the sensitive atmosphere.


    The moment foods scent wafted through the air, the people sitting at the dinner table heard nothing but the clinking of cutlery as the meat was sliced through. When the footmen opened the lids of the dishes in front of each person, a cooked fowl, which was too smallpared to the lid, could be seen.


    The birds had been fed only figs and grapes for a couple of months, and so their skin was fragrant. It was about five or six times as plump as a regr bird living in the wild. With their feathers plucked and their flesh gaining that much weight, they didnt look like theyd be able to fly.


    Come to think of it, I heard that theres a custom of wearing a headscarf whenever eating some Ortn. Isnt this kind of food considered to be a delicacy? What do you think, Miss Evans.


    Y-Yes?


    This was the first time Raymond spoke to her. However, Ise couldnt be pleased by this fact. Just a moment ago, she gave a speech about voracity. Of all things, why did the next dish be the representative dish of voracity.


    Will you need to use a scarf? So that God would not see your appetite.


    He said this with a smile, but his words had not an ounce of kindness. Seeing his daughter in a tight spot, Verdic stepped in for his daughter.


    Haha, Sir Raymond, please dont tease her so much. Isnt she still young?


    Miss Evans already has enough insight and judgment that I respect her for it.


    Mmh, indeed.


    After clearing his throat, Verdic continued speaking.


    You know, in fact, my daughter is worried about many thingstely.


    Huh, she really is your daughter, even with that businessmans mindset. Rather than doing those things, my Carynne reads either scriptures or other pieces of literature that she wants to read. Isnt that enough for a girl of their age?


    What, no, it wasnt something like that.


    As the fief lord suddenly spoke up, Verdic took this chance to bring something up with the fief lord.


    Then what is it?


    Um, I heard that there was this one maid whomitted a mistake towards my daughter.


    Are you talking about Nancy?


    Verdic nodded right away.


    Your Lordship, youve heard about it, too?


    There had been such amotion after all.


    At the fief lords rebuke, Verdic gave his daughter a pointed look. However, Ise could hardly care about her fathers re because she was looking closely at the fief lords mouth.


    She resigned not too long ago. She said she was stillcking in many ways, so she resigned for that reason.


    Is that so? I thought she was only enjoying her vacation.


    It was after her vacation.


    And the fief lord shrugged and stabbed the fowl with a fork.


    She came back a few days ago and said that she couldnt continue working, then she left.


    <i>Crack, crack.</i>


    As he chewed a slice out of the fowl, there was an audible sound of bones being crushed.


    * * *


    Father, who did you see? Who was it you talked to? That person you saw, you talked to and sent awayshes my dead maid. And it was a maid I killed with my own hands.


    Carynne had so many questions. However, Carynne refrained from uttering the questions that lingered at the tip of her tongue. There was nothing amiss. Experience buildsposure. Carynne continued to speak to her father as she normally would.


    Nancy just went like that Im a little disappointed.


    After gulping down, the fief lord patted his lips with a napkin and replied.


    What can we do? That''s just the nature of a wandering nomad.


    With a slight smile as though asking if the foods alright, the fief lord nced over to Verdic.


    What do you think, Mister Evans? Was my answer satisfactory?


    Of course, Your Lordship. Rather than that, Im excited to taste the food.


    As the head of this house, I can proudly rmend it.


    The meal continued. One gypsy womans whereabouts was worth less than the food before them.


    Verdic then took a slice of the fowl into his mouth. The sensible chef pre-cut sections around the neck, so it was easy to eat up. Verdic absolutely loved the wild fowl entre, enough that he closed his eyes just to focus on its taste.


    What his tongue tasted first was the butter and mashed potatoes thered atop the meat, and the moment he took the slice into his mouth, it seemed to melt softly. As he chewed through the velvety bite, a sweet fruit scent was exuded as the oil that seeped out moistened his throat.


    There was a hint of the rich vor of wine that marinated the meat on his tongue. Adding to the pleasure of chewing was the sensation of crushing small bones, which were softened because the fowl had been cooked over high temperatures. And when the small lungs and heart of the bird burst as his teeth had ground over them, sweet juices overflowed his mouth.


    Ohhh, this taste.


    At his parents house back then, he used to eat two or three of these,ughing at the supposed tradition of only eating one a day. Its important to be meticulous for this dish that he was passionate about, and Evans loved everything about it.


    Everyone at any ce would consider roasted wild fowl to be a luxurious, high-quality dish thats elevated. So while knowing the variety of spices and garnishes that would go well with this dish, Verdic was confident that he was a fanatic who knew everything about it.


    What on earth was used here?


    Thebination of the meat, garnish and wine was sweeter than anything else, but the delicacy also had a mix of bitterness and sourness to its taste. He had experienced adding a sour vor atop a refreshing taste, but it was the first time he had encountered a subtle bitterness at the tip of his tongue with this dish. Though he was thinking hard about which ingredients were used, Verdic was surprised by the harmony that followed then after.


    It was like a taste that would tease his tongue. The shock of this taste was enough that he was arrested by it. It wasnt unpleasant as it used other vors, but thebination itself made it even more mysterious.


    I cant put my finger on it. What is it, what fits?


    Come back to us now, Mister Evans.


    Verdics eyes widened, and tears seemed to fill them a little. It was oh so sweet. It was a greater pleasure than sleeping with any beautiful woman. Verdic then felt a sense of duty to take over the Hare territory. Compared to a schrs research, this was even greater.


    This is just Really, what was the reason that this wasnt brought out until now Ah, really, noI can even imagine that I was born only to taste this dish today.


    At Verdics admiration, the fief lord stroked his beard in satisfaction. Raymond and Ise also took a bite, and just as expected, their expressions changed as well. However, younger people werent familiar with the subtleties in the vor, so they could only give clichdpliments.


    Verdic was disappointed by this, as he was proud to be a true connoisseur. Its unreasonable that the same serving was given to those who couldnt even enjoy the dish properly.


    May I taste this dish again during our stay here?


    Hoho, theres none left now, so youll have to wait a long time to taste it again.


    Its a pity that I havent had this dish before this day.


    Dont be too disappointed. Its just that theres no good hunter living in our territory, so the fowls caught were limited.


    Then please give me a chance to hire better hunters. Ill pay as much as they want. Really, this is Can the chef be called? I really cant stopplimenting this.


    A momentter, a plump, middle-aged man stood in front of Verdic. He was wiping his sweat.


    Youre truly a praiseworthy man. Ive not had a chance to admire the true value of your other dishes so far, but I can tell you right now that your hands are genuinely worthy of even more exquisite dishes.


    Thank you very much, sir.


    Just how did you make it taste like that?


    I melted salt and butter with a one is to one ration over the potatoes and


    No, no. Rather than that, Im curious about how you cooked the fowl.


    It was in a high-temperature oven. The wild fowls were fed only figs and apples for a month, and then they were marinated in wine


    No, instead of that, um I apologize.


    Coughing for a moment, Verdic grew conscious of his impatience, so he refined his tone.


    I cant identify what kind of spices were used, so Im curious about the mixture of the seasonings. I dont think its any of the herbs that I know of.


    Uh


    The chef hesitated to speak.


    Please tell me. Is it a secret recipe? Your Lordship, Ill pay a reasonable price. I dont think Ill be able to forget this taste.


    Mm, its just as you said. Actually, the herbs


    I was the one who had them put in.


    Dun replied with a quiet voice.

 Chapter 23

    Chapter 23


    That was delicious. Thank you, Reverend.


    Amidst the silence, only Raymond spoke up.


    For the next lord of the territory to have been involved with the cooking, it was nothing to be proud of.


    All he needed to do was to assist the current fief lord in the administrative duties, or other than that, he was to be in charge of greeting or sending condolences to the territories residences as a priest. Topliment him in this was also a delicate matter.


    Oh my, you should have let us know earlier, Ise quipped.


    Ive wanted to hear about various perspectives. I dont have the same opinion, but Miss Ise thinks that fasting would be enough to provide sustenance for those below her station.


    Thats right.


    You dont seem to agree, Mister Verdic.


    Ises face turned bright red. She had criticized the Hare family so enthusiastically, but with Verdics avariciousness side-by-side, her stance didnt make sense.


    I enjoyed it a lot as well, Reverend. If Im not wrong, I believe these are medicinal herbs atop the dish. Is that right?


    Youre right. I d-dont always interfere with the cooking, but I sometimes do when its necessary.


    Because of this, I was able to taste something not only delicious, but also healthy. Thank you.


    Indeed, it was a shame to be the fief lords puppet. Verdic looked at Dun differentlyhe was merely an obstacle. If Dun and Carynne were to get married, no matter how much Verdic would get to monopolize the real power in this territory, the Hare family would persist to have the final say in anything.


    Fortunately, he didnt need to care about the priest that much. On top of being ipetent, he was a stutterer. However, seeing the skills he disyed here, with his involvement with cooking and health, Verdic licked the oil on his lips with his tongue.


    Carynne hadnt even taken a bite of the wild fowl yet. Verdic looked at her te furtively, wondering if she would refrain from eating and yield the serving to him.


    Their eyes met.


    Carynne smiled slightly.


    In his embarrassment, he tried to avert his eyes, but Carynne continued to look at him as she took a slice of the fowl and brought it to her lips. As she chewed, she dropped her gaze.


    Unpleasant.


    And it became even more unpleasant when Carynne saw that Raymond was staring at her. This damn knight. Just how much do you think I let it slide until now!


    Noticing the direction of Raymonds gaze, Ise immediately became prickly.


    Hmm, but is anyone here sick? It tastes good, but its not something that a priest should


    Verdic gently stepped on his daughters foot. <i>Stop it.</i>


    Im the one whos not feeling well.


    The fief lord replied with a forced smile.


    So if you can stop tormenting Dun, that would be great, Miss Evans.


    In that deste atmosphere, the chef quietly stepped out, saying that he would prepare some refreshments. Then, as the fief lord cleared his throat while he mentioned that they all must need to go about their own businesses now. And so it was the deration to the end of their gathering.


    Since the formal dinnersted more than three hours, the fief lord went to the smoking lounge. Verdic hurriedly trailed after him.


    * * *


    Ise wiped her tears and fixed her makeup.


    The woman in the mirror was a mess.


    Her words, her makeup, everything.


    Youre just a cheap viin at this rate


    That girl, why did <i>she</i> have to be so pretty?


    What Ise saw in front of her was a lifeless blond color. Her hair was not gold. Though the texture was soft, her roots were brown. Her hair looked like a broompared to Carynnes hair. Ise cursed her mother for not giving her more beautiful qualities when she gave birth to her, but she soon shook her head.


    She was confident enough when it came to money or business, seeing as she had nurtured a business acumen through the practice of distinguishing between documents and crunch numbers, thereby bing adept at finding legal loopholes for sess.


    But when she was faced with all the innate qualities that Carynne Hares family had bestowed upon her, Ise felt that all of her own strengths just faded away.


    <i>How many people do you think actually marry for love?</i>


    But Father. You have a mistress. When I was five years old, I saw you kissing my tutor. You always make a point to respect Mother, but you never treat her as the only woman for you. Of course, Mother also found out and changed the tutor. But the saddest thing for me was when I saw Mother being so affectionate with the butler. Whats wrong with dreaming of love? Whats wrong with that?


    <i>Thunk.</i>


    She hit the mirror. However, the mirror stayed intact. Only her hand was hurt.


    The cloudy reflection in the mirror got smudged by the handprint, bing even more blurred.


    Ha


    While analyzing business documents to no end, she always still admired the fairytales she had read which often featured princes and princesses who had the perfect love stories. Their love for each other never changed. The prince would always love the princess, would always protect her, and they lived happily ever after.


    Ise couldnt forget the day she first met Raymond. He was like a prince in a fairytale. He was every girls dream. He didnt fall in love with her at first sight, but thats alright. Even if their first meeting went over like that, there were also many other stories that had happy endings. Over time, he woulde to see her strengths, and


    Thats not going to happen


    Sheughed in vain.


    Her demeanor changed, so now shes pretending to be pitiful? <i>Ha,</i> Iseughed at her own weakness. Carynne must be feeling rxed. Howfortable it was to look both pretty and pathetic as she didnt have money. Would Ise try to imitate that aspect of her? For someone as rich as her, it would be repugnant to even make an attempt at mimicry.


    Rather than a womans appearance, it was her speech and ability that was the most important. A talented woman like her could make a lot of money through her capabilities, and this trait was pricelesspared to a beautiful womans smile.


    For merchants or for those who wanted a talented woman to be their daughter-inw, there was the detestably low preference for a lover. Ise had seen too many of such cases. She was so sick and tired of it already.


    But She thought that Raymond would be different Her father said so. At one point, Ise noticed that her fathers mistresses were always younger and more beautiful than her mother.


    She came to know the truth, yet it was already toote. Noeven if she knew, it was something that she wouldnt be able to prevent. Thats just an excuse.


    Rather, she would have been more miserable now if she hadnt studied so hard like that in the past. And not only did Ise pour a lot of money for her studies, but it was the same for her outward appearance. She applied various cosmetic products on her face and hair and, at the same time, draped stylish clothes over her body to make her look better.


    However, was there a way to change her proportions? Was there a way to change the natural shape of her face and body? Was there a way to change herplexion and the color of her hair?


    A human beings worth did not lie in their appearance, and so they cultivate their inner beauty in order for God to extend his grace yadda, yadda, yadda. Bullshit.


    If she happened to be like Carynnejust sitting there and looking around, not being able to say anything beyond a word or twoIse could see how miserable shed be. It was obvious that she would just wither and be like weeds, and no one would care about her any longer.


    Ise fixed her makeup. She gritted her teeth. Lord Raymond, youll still have to marry <i>me</i>. You were <i>sold</i> to my family. An Evans would never let go of any debt.


    Haha.


    Beyond the terrace, she could clearly hear Raymondsughter. She saw his shiny blonde hair at first nce. So he couldugh like that, too, as though it wasing from the bottom of his heart.


    Little by little, Ise could also hear Carynnes voice. She looked cheerful.


    Ise suppressed the urge to rush in and grab that girls hair.


    She listened intently. The faint volume of their voices formed a conversation.


    You don''t believe me?


    Wow Sir Knight, how awfully confident of you.


    As he smiled at Carynne, Raymond found Ise. Ise knew that he definitely saw her there. But he continued to talk to Carynne without even caring about her presence.


    Im a very popr groom candidate.


    Cruel, as though his engagement with Ise had nothing to do with him.


    I cant believe youre saying that about yourself, goodness Youre incredible.


    Am I not?


    How would I know? I met you for the first time that night.


    Raymond leaned in slightly and looked into Carynnes eyes.


    Youre lying, arent you?


    Pardon?


    You know me.


    Ise held her breath.

 Chapter 24

    Chapter 24


    During the brief break, Carynne ripped off the decorative flowers draped over her one by one. While doing so, she struggled to untangle herplicated thoughts and thought about it.


    Who did her father say he met?


    Obviously, Carynne strangled Nancy. But did she stop breathing for sure? No way, no way. In case she hadnt died from that, Carynne would have done something about it. Then since its like this, from when did the illusion stop and reality start? Carynne was suspicious of the incident, but rather, she was more distressed about herself.


    Haa.


    She breathed in the cool night air. Perhaps her mind was getting a little clearer because of this. Leaning on the balconys railing, she looked up at the moon. Her head was pounding. She needed some time to think.


    How far could she trust her own senses?


    Carynne looked down at her hands. How far could a lunatic be sure of her own senses when she knew for a fact that shed gone mad?


    In the end, Carynne had no choice but to guess through the others, not through herself. More than anyone else, she couldnt trust herself.


    She contemted other peoples words rather than her own perspective and experiences. First, she had to exclude the assumption that even this was just a dream. Lets think about this rationally, Carynne.


    Ise saw Nancys corpse. Nancys death was certain to some extent, since Carynne also personally saw the same corpse. And the coachman who used to fancy the maid was now interested in Donna.


    But lets set this aside for now. Therey no certainty in emotions. Dialogue, testimoniesthese were the ones that mattered.


    There was a certain window of time between Carynne and Ise seeing the corpse. Carynne had no intention of hiding the corpse in the first ce, so she just left it as is. She also left the ne on the body. Between those timeframes, there was plenty of time for someone toe and chop up the corpse.


    Whatever process they used, there was only one thing for her to confirm right now.


    Did the fief lord tell the truth about this?


    What are you thinking so hard about?


    Raymond suddenly entered the dark balcony.


    So damn annoying.


    Carynne had to wrestle with herself to school her features as she looked at Raymond. He butted into her thoughts.


    Its nothing much.


    She crushed the petals in her hands and threw them away. Annoying. If this life could be considered a good fantasy, then among everything here, Raymond was a first-ss nightmare. His outward appearance was luminous, but he was <i>never </i>the answer.


    His love was meaningless.


    His face, his capabilities, his wealtheverything was useless when Carynne had so many questions.


    If its nothing much, then I would like to spend this time reserved for nothing together with you.


    Please dont tease me.


    I apologize. Would you like to have a drink? This has high sugar content, so its a good refreshment.


    Youre teasing me properly, arent you.


    Frustrated, Carynne red at the ss as she replied.


    I cant drink liquor because of my injury.


    Ill have to drink two sses then.


    Whoop-de-doo.


    Why dont you just drink from the bottle?


    Go ahead and die from alcohol poisoning. Thats perfectly fine.


    Haha!


    Raymonds eyes widened, then he burst intoughter.


    It seems like youre in a sour mood?


    What should I be happy about? I got stabbed by a knife


    Because you werete.


    Raymonds face lit up with a refreshing smile as even his eyes curled up.


    Dont you think that seeing me is a good thing?


    Pardon?


    There was also one noble youngdy who applied to be a nurse on the battlefield just to look at me.


    Ah, yes Is that so.


    With a yful smile, he made eye contact with her. It was a boyish face.


    You dont believe me?


    Wow Sir Knight, how awfully confident of you.


    Show off. Carynne giggled even though she didnt find this very funny. Raymond had always been full of confidence. A man like him was adored everywhere he went. Rather, it would be a lie for a handsome man to be humble.


    But this attitude isnt very good.


    Are you suggesting that I be more reserved?


    No, not exactly like that, but something like this.


    All of a sudden, Raymond was holding Carynnes hand. She looked up. She tried to pull away, but Raymond held her tightly and did not let go.


    What do you mean, like this? Like what?


    Miss Evans Shes here, you know.


    <i>Tch.</i> Carynne noticed Ises presence.


    It just seems like your hand might have gotten hurt.


    Let go.


    Please give me a moment.


    Shit. Thanks to Raymond, who didnt care whether Ise was listening or not, Ise was going to bully Carynne for sureter. Ise was close. This was <i>not </i>a good sign.


    There was once a time when Ise was so ovee by jealousy that she poured tar on Carynne. Ah, she hated it whenever her hair would get messed up. Carynne preferred a more covert bullying method.


    Its a face that I really dont like though.


    Yeah. Thanks to him, the future was certainthe length of her hair would change. Carynne became frustrated with Raymond. No matter how she felt inside, Raymond continued to look at her with a gentle gaze.


    I already anticipated that you wouldnt like me.


    If you imagined that much, then I believe youre a bit sick. Why would I do that?


    Im a very popr groom candidate.


    Whispering to Carynne, he said this so sincerely, as though he was truly having fun.


    This negotiation is quite favorable to the Evans family, Raymond continued.


    So?


    Unhurriedly, Raymonds eyes turned towards the very tip of her fingernails, to her wrist, her shoulders, then downhis gaze stopped at her side for a moment, before he once again looked into Carynnes eyes. His deep, sharine voice rang in her ears. Carynnes throat quivered minutely.


    If you steal me away from Miss Evans, then it will be the perfect revenge. So I thought about it. I believe youre aiming for my body. And I think youve known me for a long time.


    Haa, how would I know you? I met you for the first time that night.


    Raymond leaned in slightly and looked into Carynnes eyes.


    Youre lying, arent you?


    Pardon


    You know me.


    <i>Ba-dump.</i>


    Theres no way.


    Of course not.


    What You, I know youre famous because youre a war hero.


    Not like that.


    Theres really no way.


    In the past, decades ago, almost 100 years ago, since the very first meeting.


    Ive tried to tell you several times. Ive tried to <i>ask </i>you several times.


    Dont you know me? Do you really not remember me? How could you forget me?


    Are you saying that Im seducing you on purpose?


    And you didnt.


    You didnt remember me.


    That night, I saw you say my name. You were quite a distance away, but I saw that you said my name for sure.


    Ah, I knew it.


    Carynne couldnt stand the disappointment washing over her. But still, she expected that it would be like this.


    Just in case<i>just in case. </i>Maybe youd remember your previous life. Then I wont live this repetitive life alone. I hoped for just a moment. But what can I expect? Ive already tried to check that much in the past.


    Ah Right, so you saw. Miss Ise did boast a lot about you being a sharpshooter


    She twisted away from him.


    How disappointing. Right, I have to y the role of an innocent girl, a shy tomboy who secretly likes you.


    I heard a rumor that youre here Youre famous even in these parts, so just, perhaps you dide


    Her face became red.


    Thats all.


    There was also some time that psed before he ran after her. The distance should have been quite far away, and since it was nighttime, Raymond couldnt have read her lips clearly. Even so, he cornered her and asked if she really said his name, so he must think so.


    Carynne felt the heat of her anticipation die down. The night air was chilly.


    Well, alright.


    The space between them had gotten wider. But Raymond held her hand again.


    You really dont get surprised at all.


    What do you mean?


    That night, I said I had read your lips But why arent you surprised?


    Pardon? Because, you have good eyes


    Hadnt he always been the beloved knight?


    But the gentle look in his eyes disappeared, and strange doubts arose. His lips were twisted now.


    People usually just admire my shooting skills.


    He gripped her hand a little tighter before he let go again.


    You werent awestruck, neither were you suspicious of me. Its like you already know me so well.


    But when you look at my face, it seems to be far from something like affection.


    What Lord Raymond, youre going too far with your usations. Fine. I thought that it would be morefortable for mefor the sake of my familyif youll fall in love with me. But dont try to read more into it than that.


    So you nned to seduce me? With that expression on your face?


    While Raymond spoke still with the same expression as a while ago, Carynne felt a little flustered and awkward. She tried to step back, but there was no more space behind her.


    Avoiding his burdensome gaze, Carynne continued speaking.


    I was trying until a while ago. Now that Ive been caught, Im feeling terribly ashamed. Happy now?


    She pushed Raymond away. However, rather than moving, his trained body was stuck there as though <i>he </i>was the one pushing her. There was still a smile on his lips.


    Sir Raymond. Please refrain from paying too much attention to my fiance.


    Dun was here, and he grabbed Raymonds arm.


    Excuse me.


    He took Raymonds hand off.


    L-Lets go back.


    Carynne rubbed her wrist. Dun usually didnte at this time, but its a good sign that Dun was approaching her this often. It would be easier to kill him. On the other hand, it seemed like its going to be a challenge to kill Raymond.


    But itll be worth it. Ill kill you. <i>You.</i> Definitely. The moment you beg for my love, Ill hand you a poisoned chalice. Raymond, my knight. I cant believe youre resisting like this. I cant believe youre twisting a dagger of doubt like this. Its getting harder and harder to kill you.


    Carynne inwardly recalled her vow.


    Carynne wished to kill Raymond. Because hes the male lead. Wasnt it unfair to keep dying alone? If the story changed when one character was killed, it gave her goosebumps just thinking of what kind of ending there would be after Raymonds death. Itll be fun, certainly.


    Carynne would continue to kill. He would be Carynnes main dish. She could cook him and chew him and swallow him whole.


    Even at this moment, there was something she was curious about. He was always like that. Regardless of which ending. She wondered then, if he would be the same again this time.


    She wants to know.


    <i>Will you love me again this time?</i>


    * * *


    Now then. Its time for an experiment.


    In a little while, she would be able to find out if her father lied. While holding a watch up, she nced over at the chopped-up corpse. Shed know for sure this time. Lets see if the body disappears after a day.


    Will you watch it closely without looking away?


    The boy shook his head with tears brimming his eyes. He didnt want to do it. Carynne didnt like this. She grabbed the kids shoulder tightly and smiled up close to his face.


    Understand? Watch it closely.


    Carynne looked down at the boy she had kidnapped.

 Chapter 25: A funeral in which no one weeps

    Chapter 25: A funeral in which no one weeps


    <b> 04. A funeral in which no one weeps</b>


    Lastly, I, as the judge, would like to thank His Lordship, the Fief Lordno, the father of the youngdy who had suffered so much from an unsavory situation.


    The judge took off his ck cap and bowed towards the fief lord.


    Tom, who had just been watching the ants crawling on the floor, realized that the boring procedure was finally over. A thunderous round of apuse filled the courtroom. Tom thoughtlessly pped as well, but he came to his senses and realized that this was not the time for that, so he stopped.


    He wasnt allowed to be swayed by this atmosphere. Although it was just a small presiding judges courtroom, there were still about thirty people who attended this trial. Its like theres a festival inside this ce. Everyone was smiling in excitement.


    The ruling was clear. Two men made an attempted robbery and murder against the fief lords daughter who lost her way. A young nobleman saw this as he happened to pass by, and thus he exacted justice upon those crooks. Here, the judge was the fief lord and the defendant was the young nobleman.


    The judgment for the crimes of Hans and Thomas, both deceased, ended in less than ten minutes, and subsequently, the judgment for Sir Raymond, the man who killed those two, had ended with the judge bowing his head towards him.


    The audience was satisfied as justice had been served, whispering also about the young noblemans handsome countenance. The trial ended before lunch time, so they would continue to discuss what they saw here over their meals.


    Look at that, even though his father died, he isnt even shedding a single tear.


    Except for Tom.


    Thomas, the man who tried to sexually assault the fief lords daughter and had been killed by the knight, was Toms father.


    Its a problem too if he cries. How can he, to His Lordships daughter Gosh.


    Well done, dying like that.


    He bowed his head as he heard those hushed words. He was nicknamed Tom because he had the same name as his father.


    He was the son of a man who did well by dying.


    To him, these words sounded like, Why dont you die soon, too? Perhaps the innermost thoughts of those people were not so far off.


    He didnt say anything until the end, really a great job. How brave.


    Was it brave not to say anything? Tom wanted to know the answer, but what was more important to him now was what the gentleman could give him. What he received before the trial was not enoughjust one piece of candy. The gentleman acted as though it was a precious thing, but it was nothing for Tom, who worked every week for Dale, the bakery owner.


    Tom knew for a fact that he was too old to be so happy about just one piece of candy. As the gavel rang three times and the audience spilled out of the presiding judges courtroom, Tom popped the candy into his mouth. Its rather sweet. It tasted different from the hard sugar cubes that Dale sometimes put in his mouth.


    The gentleman said that Tom should stay still throughout the trial. He told the child to eat the candy if he got bored, then said that hed give Tom a reward if hed be good. So, he behaved himself because of these words. Hed be able to receive his reward now.


    Tom was confident in holding himself back for as long as there was a reward.


    Is it over now, sir?


    Yes. Here.


    A sparkling gold coin fell into Toms palms. Tom fiddled with the gold coin, which he had never ever seen before. With one gloved hand, the gentleman covered Toms hands to close his fingers over the coin.


    Dont show it to others.


    And with the other hand, he gripped Tom tightly.


    You have to live alone from now on.


    * * *


    <i>Tom, Tom, are you there?</i>


    It was a familiar voice. Tom hurriedly finished his work and nced up. The bakery owner huffed and pushed Tom roughly to get him to dress up.


    <i>Whats going on?</i> Tom asked.


    The one who came in was Rona, Hans wife. Living with bruises on her face all the time, she sometimes called Tom over toin or to give him some thin, watery soup. Whenever Tom saw her, he wondered if she was simr to his mother who ran away. Rona was practically in the same situation as Thomas wife, so that thought wasnt wrong.


    <i>Did you drop your bread?</i>


    He didnt want to share any of his today because there wasnt enough. Tom sneakily hid his bread under the table. The bakery owner disappeared through the back door. Still, Tom had been given the payment for his work, so it was a relief.


    <i>No, Tom. Something big happened.</i>


    His father died.


    Rona did not attend the trial. Thomas and Hans were supposed to be here as the defendants, but they couldnt. Their heads had holes in them after all.


    So a gentleman wearing a fedora came to pick up Tom and told him that someone had to stand trial.


    <i>Hes your father, right?</i>


    Tom left the courtroom. The sky was clear and blue. Nine years old wasnt a bad age to start working.


    If one were to go to the city, everyone there was working. And really, it wasnt only in cities but also in viges. Larry from the house below and even Carey, the cksmiths son, were both also working. Tom was the only one who wasnt.


    But Im too weak.


    His father Thomas was a good-for-nothing, so no one paid Tom to do work. If Tom were to make a mistake, it would be difficult to get anypensation from Thomas.


    Still, he couldnt just y. At the back alley, only children who were under the age of five yed. Nine years old was too old of an age to still y. Thats why Tom eventually started work by doing whatever Rona was doing.


    Now that his father had died, he wondered if Rona would take him in, but when she announced that Thomas and her husband had died, she was so excited. She even said that shed live with the old cksmith now.


    <i>Dont act like you know me, please.</i>


    <i>Okay. Congrattions, Rona.</i>


    He congratted Rona. What he learned from Rona was that, even though he was weak, he at least was quick to grasp reality. There was not much that the boy could do, given his thin arms and a terrible father.


    While he could work like this now because he was still young, once he got taller, once his voice got deeper and once his beard started to grow, it was clear that it wouldnt be the same.


    Rona worked at the pub and she said that the pay she received didnt go lower than five silver coins, however, no one would give that kind of money to a little boy.


    Instead of money, people paid Tom with bread, a little salt, or theyd say that its as good as payment for Thomas and Hans liquor tab.


    For the first time ever, it wasnt bread or salt or liquor that hes holdingits money. This weight in his hand lifted his spirits. If this was the reward for being quiet for a little while, then he could be quiet for as long as it was required of him.


    But how many opportunities like this would he have in the future?


    Thomas was dead now.


    Excuse me, Mister.


    Hm?


    What do I do now?


    Tom reached up to hold the gentlemans hand. His father was dead. He tried to rape the fief lords daughter. Tom would have to desperately try to survive like a child in the streets.


    What do you mean, you have to live alone of course. Didnt I tell you just now?


    The gentleman made a face and tried to shove away Toms hand. But Tom hung on tighter.


    He would be in trouble starting as early as tonight. Without his father, he had already seen countless people who wouldnt even give even the minimum payment. Thomas was a good-for-nothing, but when Tom had grown weak, he went in front of the houses and yelled while breaking things.


    Since his fathers death had been disclosed to so many people, Tom grew nervous. He didnt know whos going toe tonight. He should secretly hold his breath while hiding in the closet or in the brazier.


    I I have nowhere to go, sir. I am also ill.


    Oh my, Mister Whedor, the trial is over. Arent you going for lunch yet?


    The maid who did odd jobs for the judge saw thewyer and expressed her concern.


    Ah, this boy Thank you. Is this from His Lordship?


    Yes, it was given to everyone out in the garden. Hey, you, have one too.


    Ah No, Mister Lawyer. Please, just please


    Thewyer grunted, fixing his hat as he pushed Tom away.


    Sell the house youre living in and go read the ssified ads in the newspaper. Thats how everyone lives.


    Sell the house? How can I do that?


    Bring the necessary documents and No, this isnt my job. Go to the chief clerk of the neighborhood for this.


    Mister!


    The gentleman strode towards the garden.


    Sell the house? Chief clerk? Was he saying that he had to sell the house he was living in? Then what next? Where would he live? What would he eat? Would he be able to buy another house after selling the one he had?


    His vision turned dark. The real world was much tooplicated for a nine-year-old child.

 Chapter 26

    Chapter 26


    Youre not going to eat?


    Huh?


    I heard that His Lordship is providing free meals. Youre not going for some?


    A pretty girl. She looked older than Tom though. Averting his eyes, he looked at the ground. Was she someone who came to watch the trial? Since she didnt know his face, then shes probably a merchant who had traveled from afar.


    If I go, itll get weird.


    Because your dads a murderer?


    My dad is <i>not</i> a murderer!


    He shouted. However, let alone getting startled, the girl continued smiling.


    Yeah. Not a murderer, but a rapist, right? No, I guess an <i>attempted</i> sexual offender.


    That woman didnt die.


    He looked like he was about to cry. Tom widened his eyes just so the tears wouldnt fall.


    S-She didnt die. A-And in the end, she wasnt raped.


    Is that really how you feel, or are you making a remonstrance for your father?


    R-Rem?


    Hearing a word he didnt know from the girl, Tom made an idiotic sound. At this, the girl frowned.


    Rather, give me a new, fresh answer.


    Huh?


    If I like your answer, Ill give you five gold coins.


    Five gold coins. For an answer squeezed out from Toms head. What did she mean five gold coins. She must be quite rich. This opportunity would note again. Tom wracked his head on what to answer to get those coins.


    U-Uh Both? The youngdy didnt die in the end, and she wasnt raped either. I dont know why my dad had to die. And Uh, why is rape bad?


    Your answer is such a mess, where do I even start?


    No, my dad Sure, in the end, all thats left of my dad and uncle were their corpses. Thedy might have even wanted to do it on the street.


    I dont think so. Honestly, your dads filthy and ugly. Why would a young, rich woman want to do that with a man like your Mmh.


    Tom tried to think of Thomas strengths, then he remembered what his father used to say like a habithis pride.


    Hes big down there.


    Ah.


    As the girls expression changed as though she heard something unexpected, Tom continued excitedly.


    And we dont know in the end. Only their corpses were left. Why is rape worse than murder? In the end, its because hes not a noble. All nobles will eat well and live well anyway.


    Wrong answer. Theres no way a rich girl would understand his perspective on this or that.


    Tom knew that he lost his chance at those gold coins. Still, he couldnt endure the anger welling up inside him. Its like this every day. Just so he could eat, he did this every day. Wouldnt it be over after he had counted to a hundred? But Tom was so angry about this.


    Whats wrong with that? There were several prostitutes and gigolos on the street, and itd be over in no time after they open their legs or mouths. If it was punishable by death, then about fifty vigers deserved to die.


    I wanted a new answer.


    You think its fun seeing me like this?


    Kinda.


    The girl covered her lips and chuckled.


    Right then, Tom wanted to knock her down. To attack her.


    Why are you here, Miss Hare?


    Oh my. Hello, Sir Raymond. Thank you for participating in the trial. Its over, right? I had absolutely nothing to do in my room.


    That thought ended in the face of incredulity. The blond knight, who Tom saw at the courtroom, tripped Toms legs before he knew it. And as Tom fell down, his line of sight saw only the red-headed girls body, and she just stood there without looking back at him.


    U-Uh


    As he fell, his face was in pain. Despair rushed in.


    Dont go out for no reason. Please return home.


    I wasnt really shocked by any of it, Sir Raymond. Im fine.


    The girl replied with a smile. Then, she raised Tom back to his feet and whispered to him.


    At dawn,e in through the back door of the Fief Lords mansion. Ill give you the gold coins. And I have something to tell you about your father.


    Tom could not reject the offer.


    * * *


    His head was hurting. He could feel blood trickling through his hair. It was prickly, this pain.


    After the trial, he went to the back entrance of the fief lords mansion. But he was suddenly hit on the back of his head and he lost consciousness. When he opened his eyes, his hands and legs were all tied up. As his mouth was gagged by a piece of cloth, all he could say was, <i>Mmph, mmph.</i> He couldnt move because he was tied very tightly. And here, Tom had no choice but to look at Carynne Hare.


    Before him, Carynne waved her hand as a greeting when she saw that Tom had woken up.


    Youre up?


    He couldnt answer. She turned away from Tom and continued what she had been doing. She was sweating from all the hard work. Carynne continued to speak quietly as she hacked away. Tom finally realized. Hed been fooled.


    !


    I need to trust my senses, right?


    As flesh and bones were being cut with a wire saw, the sound of it sent chills down his spine.


    Now Tom knewwhen humans were being cut, the sound was the same as when animal meat was being cut. Humans were the same as animal meat.


    Tom wanted to scream out loud, but his mouth was gagged. He wanted to cover his ears, but his limbs were firmly tied. All Tom could do was writhe. And that meatthe human who had now be meatwas someone he once knew. Tom realized why he was beckoned to this ce. It was because of that meat.


    So, I need a witness.


    Tom knew that it was him who needed to witness something. Carynne threw away the saw that had flesh on it, then took out a new saw. Sweat trickled down. It appeared like she was overwhelmed with the work, but she showed no signs of stopping. There was a shine to her eyes, the feeling of fulfillment at the hardbor.


    Huu, I didnt personally see Nancy, so I dont know how many parts there should be. Usually, um The arms, legs, head. Six parts, then? Right? No, maybe not six parts. I dont think its like this.


    If only he could open his mouth, Tom would have already screamed. Anyone would. And when Tom checked the head of the corpse, he soiled himself. Carynne took the chopped off head and ced it next to Tom.


    So today, I want you to watch this for a bit. You cant sleep, okay?


    He would not be able to sleep.


    * * *


    The texture of the childs brown, curly hair felt good on her hand as she stroked it. Carynne corrected Toms posture so that he could sit upright. He would have to endure for one entire day, so she prepared this herself. Tying his hands and feet and covering his mouth while he was passed out, she gave him some water and medicine.


    The weather outside isnt not cold anymore, so I dont need to light up the firece.


    With his eyes trembling in fear, Tom struggled abruptly when he saw the face of the corpse.


    Shh, shh. Stay still. He was already dead anyway, you know. He wont touch you. Its safe.


    Oh, Tom. Its me you have to be wary of, not the corpse. However, as though he was having a seizure, Tom tried to get away from the dead body, so Carynne had to hold the block of wood in her hands threateningly again.


    Would she need to give him morphine, she wondered, grumbling. But a nine-year-old childs body was too small, and Carynne didnt know the appropriate dosage for him. If he were to die prematurely because of the drug, then it was only Carynne whod suffer in the aftermath. Its not that she didnt understand Toms confusion, but she had her own reasons. Initially, she had another corpse in mind for this.


    She didnt really want to disturb him like this. Carynne patted the childs small back and spoke.


    Even if you tell me to be strong, this is going to be my only chance The difference between a man and a womans physical strength is just Even if I try to kill more, everyones busy, and I can never be alone, and Im weak, too In the end, the only person I could kill is a kid like you. I wish I was stronger. Hm? Sorry, dont cry. You cant live long anyway.


    Thats why youre the easiest prey. Carynne draped a nket over Tom.


    Its all a matter of time, you know. In reality, you have much too many diseases. You dont know that your curly hair will soon fall out. And you have blisters on your hands and feet, then sores in your mouth, and You worked too hard, didnt you?


    The market value of his body wasnt as high as expected. Carynne spoke while she was disinfecting him. This treatment might just be in vain, but the weak feeling of camaraderie made her do so anyway. The child was either severely blistered or swollen here and there, and the fragile parts of his body now had bizarre appearances caused by inmmation.


    It was going to be impossible for him to grow up normally. No, Carynne wrestled with her memories. In the end, even if Carynne brought him here, Tom would die in a months time. It was meaningless to think about him growing.


    So, in the end, this was all too easy of a choice. To conduct her experiment, she needed a dead body and an orphan who no one cared about. It hurt her pride a little, but thats all.


    If I have to choose strong points Since hes your father, the son will be the best candidate to watch him, right?


    Thomas was fortunately entirely intact and moistened. The bodies of the criminals had been prepared by the prosecutor before the trial, and their insides were empty due to a simple preservative treatment of the corpses.


    After the trial, Carynne picked up the body that was discarded and essentially treated as mountain manure. She chose Hans for this at first out of anger<i>he</i> was the one who <i>stabbed </i>herbut she soon thought that Toms father, Thomas, would be better so that the child could focus more while watching the body. Apart from that, Thomas was lighter than Hans.


    Even so, Im d he hasnt started rotting yet.


    The door closed behind her.


    Tom was forced to make eye contact with Thomas dismembered headthen closed his own eyes. Hed rather die. Thomas eyes were no different than a dead animals eyes. The empty stare was so sickening that Tom prayed for Carynne to return and conduct whatever experiment she was doing.


    His entire body was bound, but he was free to open or close his eyes. He was going to sleep until she returned. He prayed that, as he was sleeping, he would never wake up again. He would rather just die while he was asleep.


    However, as frost seeped into his body from the frigid floor, he was reminded of his cold reality. Even when he was covered in these nkets, the cold would not go away.

 Chapter 27

    Chapter 27


    Its weird, Father.


    Verdic became more aggravated little by little. Why was she insisting on clinging to useless things when his work here was nearing its end? The fief lord was greatly offended by Ises belligerent remarks. Even when she was like that, she got the answer she wanted. So whats her problem now?


    Whats wrong? Didnt Lord Hare give you a definite answer already?


    Wasnt it <i>only</i> him who saw it? The Lord might be lying to cover up the truth, right?


    Stop it. Why are you being like this? Even before this, I was already in circles just thinking about what to do with your engagement, and then <i>this</i>.


    Hhn If the Lord was the one who murdered the maid, or if its another servant who did it, its possible. If thats the case, wouldnt you be able to use this against them, Father? I really think its weird. That day, I definitely


    <i>m!</i>


    Ise flinched and backed away. Verdic made a grim face.


    No matter what, even if I get all the rights, its impossible to kick the fief lord out of this household. A scarecrow with a zipped mouth is necessary for the merger to happen naturally. Ise, we have to live while not bothering each other too much. Especially with such trivial things.


    But what


    Ise, Im asking you to stop it already. It doesnt matter whether a ck gypsy maid died or not. His Lordship already answered you about it, and we have no right to raise the topic again. Stop it now. By any chance


    He inhaled.


    Even if His Lordship killed that maid, its not a huge concern.


    He felt somewhat sorry for his nave daughter, but on the other hand, he also felt disappointment and anger at the same time. Ise was caring too much about such trivial things now, and she couldnt understand at all. What did she have to do with that? Verdic had so many other things to do, and it didnt matter whether one maid had vanished or not.


    Rather than that, just focus on looking better for Sir Raymond. Stop acting like a wench who pretends she knows everything. No one likes that kind of woman.


    Father, I-Ill help you, so


    Stop it. You talk too much. Sometimes I regret it, that I seem to have given you too much education. You dont have to get angry when Sir Raymond looks at Carynne Hare. Sir Raymond isnt a fool. A broken engagement would be a scandal for him, so he will marry <i>you</i> eventually. Get it?


    Yes.


    No, you still dont seem to understand. Tolerate it, thats what Im saying. You shouldnt show your tail only for it to be grabbed. A moderate expertise in liberal arts makes you a good conversational partner, however the useless knowledge youve umted makes you arrogant.


    That I studied, you dont like it?


    No, thats not what Im getting at. Its not. You


    Verdic couldnt feel the need to say more to his daughter, who was now just seconds away from shedding tears. Rather than taking any of his words as advice, she would just dismiss him as a bully.


    <i>Ka-chak.</i>


    Ise came out to the hallway to return to her room. The eastern wing of the mansions fourth floor was lined up with guest rooms that looked alike. The series of rooms were indistinct and simr, and they didnt suit her tastes. Everywhere she looked, there were white or whitened fabrics draped over the walls, and the rooms also had simr carpets and much of the same furniture. So, Ise had to count the doors to know which one her room was.


    One, two, three. She entered the third room, the one thats hers. Opening her closet, her thirty-seven luxurious dresses weed her back as thoughforting her. Ise liked their soft texture that seemed to soothe her.


    Hiiic


    Still, it was hard to hold back from sobbing. She even heard strange sounds in the roomst night. She couldnt believe she was suffering from hallucinations.


    Ise had to cover her ears all night long. She was scared, but she didnt know what she was frightened of. And there was nothing she could do about it.


    Whether the dead moved or did not move. Ise had to at least attract Raymondor, as his partner, to maintain his interest to the point that he would not break the engagement.


    But even <i>that</i> was difficult.


    As she hugged her dresses one by one, she calmed down eventually, but she opened her eyes when she felt something amiss.


    Whats this?


    It was the texture of a rough fabric that should not be in her closet. Ise frowned as she pulled it out and threw it down.


    Who would even wear Ah.


    When looking for her ne that day, she ordered someone to bring out old clothes. It looked like the clothes she wore back then were washed and mistakenly put in here. Ise scowled and threw those clothes in the trash.


    Gosh, how disgusting.


    She gave Carynne her dirtied clothes back then because it got stained with period blood, but she couldnt believe that <i>these</i> clothes got into her closet. Even the maids here wouldnt be caught wearing this.


    Once she became the madam of this ce, the first thing shed do would be to change theundry maids.


    But then, Ise frowned as she thought of something.


    What?


    The maids clothes, at that time, should have gotten dirtied with her period. Ises body grew rigid <i>Wait.</i>


    Back then it was period blood, right?


    The next day after that, Ise was lying down all day because of menstrual cramps. But no matter how much she thought about it, it was strangeIse had changed her skirt back then, but not her undergarments.


    Wait, huh? That doesnt make sense?


    Her skirt had obviously been soaked with blood. It was to the extent that Carynne frowned at it and asked her about changing her clothes first before she left. But no matter how much Ise tried to remember, she couldnt recall borrowing any undergarments that day.


    This meant that the blood that was on her that day was not her own blood.


    Ah.


    Ise unfolded the skirt. It had already been washed clean, so nothing was on it. And time had already passed.


    This fact wasnt important at all. Thats right, it was here. Ise stared at the fabric.


    Its none of my business whether that maid died or not.


    She gritted her teeth hard. Yes. Its none of her business. Just forget it. Forget. Dont think.


    But that night, Ise couldnt sleep again.


    There it was again, those faint cries shes been hearing.


    * * *


    Excuse me.


    Ise cursed herself inwardly as she knocked on Duns door. Dun was preparing for a morning service at dawn at that moment, and when he opened the door, his expression distorted mercilessly.


    Well, she didnt want toe here either, okay? Ise pushed down theing urge to retch. If this man was attractive at all, Carynne would have married him immediately. If that happened, there would have been no huge obstacle between Ise and Raymond right now.


    Its just, I, these days Um, I cant sleep well.


    Alright.


    While sitting down, Dun wrote some notes while his brows were furrowed. Even his handwriting was ugly.


    Its like I can hear someone crying every night I saw something strangeIm not crazy.


    Resisting the desire to stab the eyes of the man who looked as though he was belittling her, Ise continued.


    And I strangely keep getting more irritable these days.


    P-Prayer and meditation will be more helpful. Especially for s-someone like you.


    What did he just say. Ise stopped herself from cursing. Bedylike. Ise repeated.


    Just give me medicine to help stabilize my mood.


    Dun licked his lips for a moment, but eventually, he opened a drawer. After taking something out, he handed over a bundle to her.


    If you take a dose of this before sleeping, it will help.


    As she heard that this would help stabilize her mood, Ise stared at the medicine from a distance. It was a bundle of dried purple flowers. Those were what Carynne put in her tea every time.


    Carynne drinks this every day.


    Yes. It has a calming effect.


    Shes always calm though. Why is she drinking something like this?


    Ise couldnt understand. Carynne was always nice, and she never even spoke loudly. Even when she got stabbed and was carried back, she even made jokes about it.


    Huh?


    Seeing Duns hardened expression, Ise felt that something was strange.


    More, to calm her down, thats why.


    I know you cant speak well, but why dont you try speaking in a way that could be understood more?


    Duns face became red. He soon put down his pen and rose to his feet. Seeing how much taller he was than she had expected, Ise was flustered.


    Pointing to the door, Dun spoke.


    Miss Evans. Please dont pay attention to useless things.


    His voice was firm. Without any tremors.


    * * *


    When Carynne saw that the body did not disappear, she felt that it was as expected.


    It started to smell little by little. The clock she had left in there hadnt disappeared, and the time it told didnt go against the watch she had brought with her.


    Even if trifling things such as emotions would change, thews of physics couldnt be ignored. When Nancy had disappeared, the corpse did not vanish until about twelve hourster.


    This was Carynnes conclusionthe fief lord had lied for her. She wondered if this was an evident denial on his part.


    What appeared before Carynnes eyes now was the entric behavior that she wanted to see. Even so, it was spoiling her fun.

 Chapter 28

    Chapter 28


    Good work. You must have had a hard time.


    Even the trembling Tom did not disappear. And, his swelling had subsided a lot. Carynne touched the childs skin, feeling that he was truly alivethat she was truly living in reality as she could touch his skin. She couldnt believe her own senses, so she needed someone she could watch <i>with</i>, and for this task, Tom was the suitable individual.


    Thank you. I was afraid youd disappear, too. I was scared.


    Carynne had brought with her some medicine to help Tom. She felt some sympathy for the child. Nine years old. What a terribly young age. It was so long ago for her that she couldnt even remember.


    While Carynne livedfortably in a fief lords household, while chattingfortably with Ise and Dun, while meeting Raymond and the countessthis boy lived a life being trampled all over at the bottom of the pyramid in the vige. On top of that, this little boy would die from all kinds of diseases about a monthter.


    Thats why Carynne <i>had</i> to kill him even more. To get rid of this sympathy.


    If she wouldnt kill him out of sympathy, then she wouldnt be able to do anything. Nancy didnt die because she had sinned. Those people in the circus tent did not die simply due to bad luck. Even Hans and Thomas, the boys father, were people who would <i>not</i> have died if Carynne had not interacted with them.


    So, Carynne had to be fair and impartial. She should just move ording to chance and interest. Here, Carynne had defined herself as an obligatory self-indulgent killer.


    Her duty was pleasure. In this life, without pleasure, Carynne would have nothing to hold in her hands.


    Im going to kill you because I <i>can</i> kill you.


    And Tom was such a good target to kill.


    Carynne had a knife, some rope, and a pistol. The gun was a contentious choice from the beginningthe sound would ring out. Carynne tried to do away with Tom through drugs then, but she soon realized her mistake.


    Ah Gosh, I forgot to bring a syringe.


    If she were to open his mouth, hed scream, so she would have had no choice but to use a syringe. However, the syringe she used the first time had already be rusty.


    After contemting for a while, Carynne touched Toms neck. She felt his veins throbbing with a fluttering pulse on the young childs slender neck.


    People dont die easily. The mortician had already drawn all of Thomas blood and had him sewn shut. For something like that to happen in this cer, shed have to cut his veins and let the blood trickle out all day long.


    Ah, youre going to die anyway, so why should I.


    Carynne clicked her tongue. What did it matter if it was a rusty syringe? She tapped his neck and put morphine into the rusty syringe. If she wanted a lethal dose, shed have to inject one dose at a time.


    Ugh, calm down Stay still.


    Hearing what she was saying to herself, Tom thrashed. The bottle of morphine fell over. Sighing, Carynne picked up the syringe again. She could still inject him with it. After she took out a new bottle and inserted the rusty syringe, Tom thrashed again and tried to have the bottle dropped once more.


    <i>Thud.</i>


    Carynne grabbed Toms struggling body. And she became more distressed when she felt how thin Toms shoulders were in her hands. The nine-year-olds body was much too small.


    The feeling of thoroughly crushing the weak washed over her. This was also different from when she had killed Nancy. This child was too young. Feeling a weak sense of conflict, Carynne felt goosebumps over her skin.


    Its so distressing.


    Why the hell did kill her like that. Carynne pressed down the welling urge to cry.


    Its so disgusting to feel sympathy for herself while killing. She was already a murderer. One-sided violence and one-sided murder were too painful.


    Even so, the more she hesitated here, the more painful it would be.


    She picked up the syringe in a hurry.


    <i>Push.</i>


    The childs thrashing subsided. Carynne caressed Tom. She couldnt save him because hes already seen too much. And Carynne knew that after killing this boy, it wouldnt matter who shed kill next.


    Nine years old. A boy from the streets who was weaker than herself, a boy who would not be looked for. A child with much too many sides to be sympathetic about.


    Itll be easier if its warmer here. The effect would be faster.


    The boys tremors weakened. Surrounded with nkets, Carynne approached the firece to light it. Summer had alreadye, but nevertheless, a basement with stone floors and stone walls was quite chilly.


    It was a poorly used basement, but there were still piles of lumber stored in one corner of it. Carynne chose tworge logs and walked towards the firece.


    She tried to light them on fire, but it wouldnt catch properly. Shed have to stoke the fire first with some paper or a few twigs. Carynne threw the log on its side while it still had that small me that was about to die down, looking around to see if there were any twigs left inside the firece.


    But then, she saw something strange.


    Huh?


    There was a ck, burnt corpse inside the firece.


    Carynne frowned.


    Whos this?


    She searched through the scorched bones that were entirely ck, and ash flew into her face.


    A-choo!


    She didnt have time for this. Carynne would have to wash her face ande back to her room before Donna would go in. But things kept happening like this. Someone used this firece. She was sure that this was a ce that no one used. Who did it? Whose body was this? When did this person die?


    Questions arose. Carynne came closer to the burnt bones.


    Ugh!


    But fire erupted btedly. Carynne took a step back. Shed have to check againter.


    Im sorry.


    Goodness, the gag came loose. Do you have anything else to say?


    She pretended to be calm, but she was flustered for a moment. Fortunately, it seemed like the drugs were working because his voice was weak.


    Echoes wouldnt ring well in this basement, but if he were to scream, she wasnt sure. Feeling a bit relieved, Carynne walked towards the boy to cover his mouth again.


    S-Spare me, please Im sorry. I was wrong.


    Tom gasped as he looked up at Carynne. Tears trickled down.


    Hm? What did you do wrong?


    Ah


    Was there anything you did wrong to me?


    I carelessly spoke of Your Ladyship.


    Hearing Toms guess, Carynneughed out loud.


    Is that a crime?


    Y-Yes I-I was wrong.


    No. That wasnt a crime. You didnt do anything wrong.


    Huh?


    Carynnes eyes were zing. However, even as her eyes were on him, she wasnt looking at Tom.


    Theres no sin in the world that would make you <i>deserve</i> to die. Death happens when someone is killed. If a child steals, if a desiring man looks elsewhere, if a persons business goes bankruptis any of this enough reason for anyone to die? To not be able to sleep well, to have fallen, to have somehow ended up in this ceis this a crime punishable by death?


    Carynne muttered. It was more of a monologue. Then, an angry murmur followed.


    Just like that Comfortably If theres something to me If I did something wrong, if I said something wrong, if that was the case.


    Carynne chewed her lips as her eyes met with Toms.


    No. Thats not true. No matter what youve said, thats not why youre going to die. Its alright, Tom. Im not angry. Ah Your father was definitely not good. And I definitely dont think its right to do <i>that</i> out on the streets, but thats not why he died. Its just bad luck. Im the unluckiest girl in the world. Yeah, and this unlucky girl has be a murderous girl. Im going to keep being this way.


    Then please save me I wont tell anyone at all.


    <i>Ta-dak. Ta-dak.</i> The small spark of fire red.


    Save me please.


    I wont.


    Carynne stroked Toms head as she said this. Her touch was gentle.


    You cant live long anyway, Tom. It would be better for you to die now. Medicine is quite expensive, you know. You wouldnt have been able to touch any with your hands. So it would be better to die now.

 Chapter 29

    Chapter 29


    Tom had to try harder to open his parched lips. His tongue was getting more numb. But he had to speak. The moment he stopped speaking, that was the moment he would die.


    I want to live longer.


    The fire continued to burn. Carynne shook her head, picked up Thomas dismembered head and threw it into the firece. The mes grew wild as the corpses flesh melted off.


    She clicked her tongue and turned the head upside down. Fortunately, this fire wouldnt grow as big as a kitchens. Fire was difficult to handle after all.


    Ah, Tom. How about dying through fire? Ive experienced it before. The pain is excruciating, but it ends faster than being stabbed by a knife.


    I I wont say anything! Really! Please!


    Youre still going on about that?


    Carynne sighed as she pulled Tom through his clothes. The child tried to rebel, but his numb body wouldnt listen.


    Dont you have anything else to say?


    I really wont say Huh?


    Carynne closed her eyes. She was like this, too. But in the end, its all the same. And it was obvious that it would be more difficult to keep this child alive now. Youll be saved next time. But not now.


    If I cant say anything, isnt that okay?


    <i>Chiiiiiik.</i> At the terrible sound, Carynne took her hand off him.


    P-Pease saf me, I wont sfeak.


    Tom put a burning piece of lumber into his mouth. He showed how he wouldnt speak. The fire burned his mouth in an instant, and now, Tom could no longer make use of his tongue.


    <i>p</i>


    Carynne hit Tom hard on the back of his head. The ck piece of wood popped out. However, the smell of burning flesh was already strong.


    She frowned. How futile.


    Youre going to die anyway. In a month. Like an insect, worse off than your father. Thats why I have to kill you now. Killing you is an act of kindness. And I can do that for you.


    Carynne picked up the syringe. Tom couldnt talk anymore, only gasping moans continued.


    If I let you live, Im sure something annoying is going to happen.


    She knew. Its the truth. Carynne did not trust anyone. This boy could take advantage of any chance to kill Carynne at any time. Even dogs on the street could kill Carynne.


    However, Carynne realized that she was just trying to find enough of a justification to kill this child. She shouldnt be the one to pass judgment. But she was trying to rationalize her decision by saying that it would be better to kill him now, that it was her obligation to kill him now, that it would be more inconvenient if she did not kill him now.


    And she realized that fact. Its bothersome. Inconvenient. Ufortable. Because she couldnt understand herself.


    Carynne dyed her judgment.


    Fine. In the end, you will.


    Die.


    Or, harbor a grudge towards her for this.


    Carynne was convinced of Toms death just as she was certain of her own. He was going to die anyway. Just like her.


    She closed her eyes. There was a slight urge to shed tears.


    This time again, she would die.


    * * *


    Um, Miss Carynne Hare. I dont quite understand.


    Amidst that prolonged silence, it was Raymond who first found his voice. Even if breakfast hade to a halt due to Carynnes promation. Ise looked at Carynnes confident appearance. Everyone else had been rendered speechless.


    Carynne closed her eyes and continued to speak.


    As this territorys lord, you have a duty to the orphans, Father.


    That kid You cant.


    The fief lord replied as though struggling through his words. His daughter had dropped a bomb here at this breakfast table, and the fief lord looked as though he wanted to fling his spoon. In fact, considering how he practically mmed the spoon back on the table, it seemed as though he really would have thrown it if there were no other eyes watching.


    Please uphold your duty, Father. Youre the fief lord.


    Dont start with me, Carynne.


    This is crazy.


    Even Dun spoke up. Vedic shook his head as well.


    Carynne had just now dered that she would like to take in the child of that rapist.


    His face is cute, so I think its fine to make him a carriage footman. Ive also thought about making him a dishwasher or


    Carynne, Ill say this as a fellow woman. Are you insane?


    Even Ise couldnt hold it in. Ises emotions were close to anger right now. There was only so much she could tolerate. This was all so ridiculous that she wanted to grab her by the cor and scream at her to <i>wake up</i>. Hes not a criminal, but he was the son of the man who stabbed her and attempted to rape her.


    This child is not guilty.


    Gracious, this child is <i>also</i> guilty, Carynne. Everyone gets influenced by their parents. They give their child a name, a legacy, so why do you think that hes not guilty? Its obvious when you think that hes been brought up by such a person. This boy is going to be a criminal, too.


    As he stroked his jaw, Verdic supported his daughters statements.


    And, Miss Hare. Pursuing a rtionship where a grudge could be formed wouldnt be wise. This is my advice as an elder. This isnt a good idea.


    Carynne raised her chin firmly.


    What I believe is thisI can ovee it all through my love.


    * * *


    What do you think?


    About what.


    About me taking in this child.


    Its crazy.


    Oh, what a confident answer.


    This isnt a joke.


    Hm.


    Toms mouth was badly injured. There was a limit to the first aid she could give him when she didnt know much. Eventually, she had to take Tom to Dun.


    Dun refused and said he was busy but, in the end, he started examining the child due to Carynnes persistent coercion.


    With a frown, he looked inside Toms mouth. He pushed in some injections, gave a few medicines, and cut off some of the affected areas. The child did not feel any pain even when the ckened flesh was cut off. Rather, there was something else Tom was more afraid of.


    So, whats the verdict?


    I, I cant say just yet. And from n-now on, go to Milton for this.


    Milton was a doctor who regrly assisted Dun. He was older than Dun, but his skills were definitelyckingpared to the younger mans. At the obvious rejection, Carynne felt slightly offended.


    Why not you?


    Busy.


    Whos the one who postponed a mass just because of a scratch?


    She didnt point this out aloud. Although Dun was ipetent when it came to territorial management, he was still the next fief lord, a priest and a doctor. Even if he did just one of those, thats going to be a lot of work. Really, not only work, but that noble pride in him wouldnt allow him to look after a single footman.


    Dun wasnt the only one who felt ufortable seeing Tom. Carynne had to hold back herughter as she recalled those other peoples faces from yesterday.


    Everyones expressions changed the moment they saw him, as though they had bitten something filthy inside their mouths. Then, the next reactions were a mix of a little sympathy and some evident loathing. Even so, it was clear from their expressions that theyre keeping their mouths shut, so the only thing that happened was that the atmosphere got cold.


    In the end, it was Carynne who lifted the atmosphere once more.

 Chapter 30

    Chapter 30


    Carynne had fun making a scene out of showing Toms severe wounds. As she recalled the events of the previous day, she inwardly felt a little better.


    <i>Look at this.</i>


    <i>Bleurgh.</i>


    Ise retched.


    Resisting the urge to giggle, Carynne continued her little theater y, forcibly opening Toms mouth.


    <i>This was done by the vigers.</i>


    <i>Thats a bit</i>


    <i>Harsh.</i>


    <i>This is nothing. From head to toe, theres nothing left unscathed.</i>


    Carynne showed the sores in his mouth and his palms, then the wounds on his back. Tom wanted to scream, but he had no choice but to endure it all because he knew that no one here was on his side. Even if Carynne went as far as taking off his clothes, no one here would sympathize with him.


    <i>Ah.</i>


    No one here who would protect him.


    He was quick to pick up on things like these, and realizing this fact, Tom was filled with despair. No one felt sorry for him. The feelings directed toward him were limited to a slight revulsion, anger, and curiosity. In a position like this, he couldnt even garner any pity.


    Pressing hard against Toms twitching open mouth, Carynne looked at the fief lord.


    <i>Father, I wish to show generosity not as the Fief Lords daughter, but as the victim of the incident. I hope for a better future with forgiveness.</i>


    At Carynnes appeal, the fief lord snorted.


    <i>Stop that. Just let him be treated and send him back.</i>


    <i>This child is an orphan. In the end, its either the parish wholl take the child or Father should. Why dont you take action?</i>


    Verdic sided with the lord.


    <i>Miss Hare, there were no documents received. Let the parish take him in. Again, I must tell you that it wouldnt bode well to keep your enemies so close to you.</i>


    <i>An enemy? A child who doesnt even know how to fill out the papers? Who else would help this nine-year-old child thats been left alone? Look at his condition. Its only been a few days, but hes already be like this.</i>


    Shut it. Stay still. Carynne held Toms quivering shoulder. Tom opened his mouth a few times, but the only thing he could utter were groans and hah.


    <i>Will he be able to speak again?</i>


    At Carynnes question, Tom looked towards Dun with a pleading gaze. Reverend, please find out. Please, take a look. Please, at least say that I can speak again.


    But Dun didnt even nce at Tom.


    <i>Impossible. Not for the rest of his life.</i>


    <i>Thank you.</i>


    Tom was anguished.


    Carynne was satisfied.


    * * *


    Its quite charming to have apanion who couldnt talk. He was illiterate so he couldnt write. He couldnt speak either, and he had a short lifespan. This was the best.


    Carynne liked it because it seemed like she made a pretty good choice. Even when his body was in such a state, a boy was a boy, so he couldnt y the role of a maid. However, since he was still young, it was easy to have him apany her everywhere, and it was also easy to handle him because he was ill.


    Then, a few dayster, the body was gone. Carynne was not surprised. This time, it was Toms role to be surprised.


    Well look at this. As expected, right?


    The corpse disappeared again. Carynne pointed to the empty firece.


    Certainly, Thomas and Miss or Mister A, whose name we dont know, were both here. Ah, I can guess who it is.


    Its only been a day. Two corpses that had been here all day yesterday had vanished. Carynne left the door slightly ajar on purpose for this. However, there was no one at all talking about any dead bodies. Whoever did it, they were keeping it all hush-hush.


    Oh my god!


    <i>ck, </i>she pped once.


    The corpse is gone!


    Are you telling me tough? Tom tried to pull the corners of his lips up against his will.


    Ah


    Tom opened his mouth but his expression soon distorted in pain. There were holes in the roof of his mouth and his tongue. The most severe of his injuries was the swelling of his throat because of an infection. His breath was horrible because of the pus, so when Tom opened his mouth, Carynne covered her nose to block the stench.


    Dont talk. Just nod or shake your head.


    Tom nodded. The corpse of his dead father, which had already disappeared, was not important to him. All Tom could do was move his head, but even a reaction this small was enough made Carynne delighted. Just so her self would not copse, she needed someone to talk to.


    As she kept thinking about her ns to murder, she slowly felt that she was reaching her limit. There was only so much she could think while only repeating her thoughts to herself. She was talking to herself too much. There were many things to organize while shed talk about it, and for that, she needed a listener.


    Even <i>this</i> was still close to just talking to herself, but having someone actively responding in front of her was helping her a lot with sorting her thoughts.


    Carynne quite liked this boy who listened to her.


    This is what I think.


    Carynne picked up a piece of charred wood and drew on the floor.


    Well, its just a guess. Mmh I might be wrong.


    She felt her ears turning bright red. What if she got it all wrong? Having someone listen to her made her feel self-conscious and tense. But still, it was fun to y detective.


    Look here. The house is L-shaped, so the longer side that faces the south is the main wing, and from the fourth floor, itsposed entirely of bedrooms. The guest rooms are over here. Ises room is here, too.


    Even though her own room was on the same floor, her room was separated like this. Carynne shifted her gaze and focused on something thats far away. Arge mansion lined with simr rooms was scary enough in itself, but since the incident with Nancy, Ise had never experienced anything horrendous before. Thats why its unlikely that she hallucinated that night. Her testimony about seeing Nancy must be true.


    My room is a little far from here, and then the maids quarters are in the west wing The third room in the west wing is the servants quarters, and your room will probably be there. Mister Dane, the horseman, lives there, too. Anyway, its quite far away. So, after I killed Nancy What are you so surprised about?


    With his eyes wide open Tom made weird sounds again. In order to shut him up, Carynne had to raise the wooden poker.


    I have a bit of experience killing people. Mm, anyway, I brought her to this room over here to surprise Ise. After I gave her some paralyzing medicine, I strangled her.


    Toms body trembled. If his mouth hadnt been riddled with burnsif he could have been able tomunicate with anyone at allCarynne might have already nonchntly killed him. At first, Tom thought that Carynne didnt kill him because of sympathy, but within a few days of knowing her, he realized just how nave he was.


    This nobledy was crazy. Through and through.


    Carynne pleasantly recounted the murder she hadmitted step by step. Tom tried to pull himself back together so that he could concentrate on her words.


    I left Nancy in that room around four in the afternoon. It was about ten in the evening, on the dot, when Ise discovered the corpse. Theres plenty of time for someone toe in and cut off the head from its body But the person who could have done that <i>should</i> know what time the maids break time is. The only time that hallwayspletely empty is about half an hour. I already used up that time. That means, after that time, the servants would continuously being and going that hallway.


    She grabbed another piece of wood and drew a string of people with it. Then, she drew a line over the hallway diagram.


    At around midnight, I heard Ise running through the hallway, so I was waiting for her and went out. And didnt we go to the room together? Though she did change her stained clothes first. That was about ten minutesin total. Its impossible for anyone to clean up the corpse and avoid the eyes of the passing servants.


    Carynne was having fun.


    Tom watched Carynnes sparkling eyes. She looked so thrilled and delighted. A smile lingered on her lips and her voice was light, so he thought that he should also smile. Thats why he did. Because he thought that it would be less frightening.


    His smile didnt look natural, but that didnt matter. Whatever expression Tom had on his face, Carynne continued to smile just as she did.

 Chapter 31

    Chapter 31


    The bright voice continued speaking.


    So, someone found the body within those five hours and chopped it up. Ise said that she saw it was cut off from the neck. Then, Ise went back there with me to look at it. However, the room was unusually clean.


    She walked towards the firece.


    Summer is almost here, but why is the basement so cold? Is your room alright?


    Tom nodded.


    Ive died and lived again many times, but Im a little surprised about this. It really feels like reality is suddenly turning into a dream. I was so surprised and I was so scared. But when I thought about it again slowly, the answer that came to me became more simple.


    Carynne drew a picture of a woman. One with long hair.


    My situation is a bit unique, isnt it? No Dont look at me like that. Like I said, I keep dying and living again. And Im telling youI was so flustered because the corpse suddenly disappeared. But when I thought about it slowly, it became all too simple.


    Carynne continued speaking as she was looking at the graffiti she drew. In fact, the answer waspletelymon sense that she didnt need to exin it like this.


    Ise had been exhausted from looking for her ne all day long. And her room was in the middle of the hallway where all the guest rooms were situated.


    She should have entered the fifth room, but she entered the sixth. I thought that room was locked because no one was using it.


    Carynne pointed to the diagram of the corridor with doors on it, all with the same shape. This hallway where guests stayed was entirely uniform and without any unique characteristics to the doors or the rooms. Tom nodded his head.


    So in that roomthe sixth room, which was supposed to be emptythats where she found this head. What do you think?


    Tom tilted his head when Carynne mentioned the head. Oh, he doesnt know Nancy. This head she drew was Nancys head. Nancy was the only person who had ck, curly hair inside the mansion.


    Its Nancys Its the dismembered head of the maid I killed.


    She was the only person of color in this mansion.


    Carynne moved the drawing of the head. She thought that Nancy had been in Ises roomthe fifth roomwhen in fact, the head was in the sixth room.


    So, the corpse must have been in the sixth room. Someone moved it to the room next to Ises. But Ise identally entered that room instead of hers, and this incident urred.


    Tom nodded again, though it was evident in his eyes that he was confused about the hallway. All the doors of the mansion were difficult to differentiate because they werent numbered.


    Ise identally entered the sixth room the first time, and then when she came back there with me, we went into her room, so the corpse wasnt there. That day Its understandable since she was tired. What the, so after solving the mystery, it turned out to be nothing. How boring.


    Carynne looked into the firece, where the fire had already been extinguished, and nced up. Tom imagined that, like in that fairytale, he could be free if only he could push her into that firece. The boy killed the wicked witch and escaped.


    However, Carynne immediately pulled herself out.


    So then the number of suspects have decreased significantly. Someone strong enough to chop up Nancy into pieces in that short of a period, and also someone who didnt know that the sixth room wasnt locked. Not one of the maids, but someone from the servants who came in recently.


    Carynne thought of only three men who were likely candidates. But why did they do this for her? Carynne could think of only one reasonit was because of the man who was the owner of this domain and who could have given them money. Carynnes father, Lord Hare.


    The reason, well Im sure that Father lied. Isnt it because Father did it for me? Since Im his daughter Actually, I dont know. How far would parents usually go for their children? Since Verdic once killed me for Ise, I guess its natural for Father to take care of this for me?


    But why was it that this time, again, the corpse disappeared? Its strange. Thomas was gone. Along with the corpse that was here, presumably Nancy. When Tom pointed towards the empty firece, Carynne shrugged.


    Who knows. Isnt it possible for anyone to move a corpse for the second time? But the person who entered this unused cer, removed the first corpse, and then quietly removed the other corpse he found here. Im sure its the same person. Maybe my father nned it, and a few others acted on the n.


    Silence ensued. Even if he grew up in the harsh streets, he was still young. Actually, Tom couldnt understand even half of what Carynne was saying. What he could vaguely understand was that not only did she damage a corpse before and killed someone else, but there was someone protecting her. And she wasnt being punished for killing someone.


    So that he could stop thinking, Tom focused on Carynnes words.


    Carynne turned away from the child, touching the wall with her palms. Could he attack Carynne right now? Tom took aim at Carynnes back. He was smaller and younger than her, but maybe it was possible to pull this off if he were to rush in. He counted inwardly. <i>One</i>


    But she soon turned around. Tom sat down awkwardly again. Fortunately, Carynne didnt seem to notice that something was amiss with Tom.


    The smoke that rises from here will definitely pass through the kitchen When I started a fire a few days ago, smoke also came out from that chimney. It means that the fireces are connected, right? This hole and that hole are simr. Hey you, you need to apply the ointment before going to bed. Burns are difficult to heal from.


    Who was it exactly that made him like this in the first ce? However, Carynne genuinely looked worried. This made Tom feel even more strange.


    But regardless of what Tom was feeling, Carynne beckoned the child as she was still fumbling between the gaps in the wall. She looked excited, as though she was a good noble youngdy who had taken out snacks for the beggars to eat. He looked at her with expectation.


    I do believe in magic, but In this case, rather than it being the work of magic or God, it makes more sense that a human did it. Ive personally experienced something peculiar, so I got even more confused. That was just another way of thinking about it, but look at this.


    Carynne took out something from the gap in the wall and showed it to him.


    Tom stared at it for one moment, but as soon as he realized that it was a persons body part, he flinched back with a groan.


    Two corpses disappeared, but the body parts Ive hidden still remain.


    So she was sure that <i>someone</i> had cleaned it up.


    Tom looked frantically between his dead fathers body part and Carynnes exposed white teeth as she smiled.


    And, you know?


    Carynne used her fingers to pull something out of the bones. Rotten flesh came out.


    Your fathers <i>down there </i>isnt big. Its rotten, but Im sure of it. The only reason its big now is because its decayed.


    She had a very certain tone.


    Understand?


    It was only after a long time that Tom realized that what she was saying now was a rebuttal to what he told her on the day of the trial.


    It was a joke that he couldnt evenugh about.


    * * *


    Tom was forced to wake up at dawn because of the cold hand that touched his cheek. Carynne was sitting at the edge of his bed.


    I cant help it because Im curious.


    About what.


    There was a glint in Carynnes eyes. Those eyes shone sharply in the dark as though they were a beasts.


    As I thought, it looks like the corpse in the firece is Nancys, huh?


    Tom urged himself to open his heavy eyelids.


    But even at first nce, it didnt look like it was just dropped there, right? It didnt even break into pieces.


    The corpse of a person that had be a lump of coal had been neatly ced there. That was clear. Tom nodded.


    Its like a funeral was held for her Did someone call a mortician to sew her back up? As you saw, the bones were neatly together even though the body was burnt to a crisp. If it had been handled like that, then its highly likely that your father was dealt with like that, too. Oh hey, thats a good thing.


    Isnt it nice that someone took care of this and even held a funeral?


    His fathers corpse was originally supposed to be left as manure. Carynne sincerely congratted Tom, and with a shudder, he nodded.


    Anyway, the corpses are gone Lets just say that my father ordered someone to clean this up. But you know.


    In an instant, Carynnes smile vanished. Tom felt nervous. Carynnes mood changed so many times a day, but she never showed it externally to other people. However, in front of this mute boy, she openly expressed her viciousnessher <i>madness</i>.


    The tone of Carynnes voice grew sharper.


    I killed someone, but wasnt it too neat?


    She stared nkly into the air.


    His daughter killed someone. So, as a parent and as an individual who had power, he took care of it. Its possible. I can understand how its like that. But you know.


    The loud clenching of her teeth could be heard.


    Without even telling me, without even rumors being whispered amongst the servants, how did he do it. Its too neat.


    As if hes already expecting it.


    Carynne was <i>angry</i>. She tried to hold back her ire. Nails dug into her palms. Blood trickled out. Drops seeped into the bed.


    What does my father know?

 Chapter 32: Hunting season

    Chapter 32: Hunting season


    <b> 05. Hunting season</b>


    Three days of ashes for atonement.


    Four days of water for prosperity.


    First day, penitence.


    Second day, trespasses.


    Third day, clemency.


    The sin of the subconscious. The sin of the vulnerable. The sin of ignorance. These were all what needed to be atoned for, but the scale of the ritual varied depending on ones ie and status.


    Those who have coveted their neighbors belongings, those who have defiled their offerings, those who have made false oathsthey must confess their sins, pay back the damages tenfold, offer blood sacrifices during the ancestral rites on the day of ash. This was in ordance with the divinew, which was separate from each domains governingw.


    For those who have stolen, offermb.


    For those who havemitted adultery, offer three young cattle.


    For those who have assaulted another, offer a young mare.


    For those who have murdered,


    <i>The rest of the page has been torn. Do request for a new copy of the regtory guidelines.</i>


    * * *


    Summer was here. Although the temperature shifted greatly in the Hare Fiefdom, the weather was still generally cool, so Carynne liked summer. Fresh summer foliage and summer breeze. The shining sun shone with passion, and sometimes the clouds brought heavy rain as well, so it was fun.


    Throughout her life, human rtionships had irritated and tortured Carynne, and so thesendscapes alone providedfort to her over time. Thats why she considered herself to be fortunate that this was the ce where she was. It was neither a snow-covered terrain of the north, nor was it the burningnd of the south.


    However, it would have been better if there werent so many people barging in here to promote and bring in the citys bustling atmosphere to the countryside. Carynne was already sick and tired of Ise, and she had to meet this city girl again today.


    You cant ride a horse?


    I always went to the hunting grounds by carriage. Im actually not that good at horseback riding.


    So theres something that you cant do, Carynne. I heard the hunting grounds arent that far away. And these days, its fundamental for ady to know how to ride on horseback.


    Thank you for the advice. Ill learn next time, but I cant do it today, Ise. I trust a skilled horseman more than the horseback riding skills of a beginner like me.


    Carynne didnt want to deal with this. But she had to.


    Lent was approaching.


    With Verdic egging on the fief lord, this years Lent was going to be an unprecedentedlyrge festival. Even so, Carynne was indifferent to it because shes been repeatedly told that it was unprecedented for all of 100 years. After hearing the specific numbers and total budget, thats whats going to make someone freak out.


    A bigger memorial service <i>must </i>be held, Verdic insisted. He said that there were various, ovepping things that needed to be prayed over, like the business deal they had and the incident that Carynne faced.


    Thirty-seven sheep, seventy turkeys, seventy doves.


    It wasnt enough.


    He even suggested that perhaps it would be better to make the types of burnt offerings match with the sacred number of seven, and the fief lord epted this rmendation.


    The one who needed to kill at least one creature of each offering type and throw the carcasses into the fire was Dun, and he might just fall into an identity crisis of whether he was a priest or a butcher.


    Really, why must such useless things be done.


    It was revealed that Dun, the supposed next lord of the domain, really <i>was</i> uselessand whats worse, his weakness was right there. So after this, Verdic would look at Dun as though hed devour the younger man and discard him right then.


    Annoyed, Dun tended to leave first because he couldnt stand such a gaze, however such a minor act of rebellion couldnt stop Verdics tenacity.


    While insisting that this wasnt going to be a normal sacrifice, he called for more wild birds and deer to be caught. And so, Carynne had to prepare for a full-fledged hunt instead of a leisurely pic.


    Its not that Carynne would personally join the hunt, its just that shed be present in the hunting grounds. Still, it was so annoying. Carynne was the actingdy of the household, so this event was in the same line of responsibility as checking a maids work. She didnt have to clean surfaces herself, but she still needed to supervise.


    She had no will at all to do this, but she wanted to see her father. Carynne was so utterly annoyed by this situation. Goddamn social status. Goddamn authority. Son of a bitch responsibilities.


    Aristocrats had so much work to do and so little time to themselves. Carynne had to wake up at ungodly hours to call Donna and dress up, deal with Iseter in the morning, arrange lunch at noon, work hard along with the head maid and butler to serve Evans entourage in the afternoon, then she had to review her own daily routine.


    Considering all this, this was Carynnes workload during the <i>slower</i> days. If the fief was in a much worse state, then it could only go downhill from here.


    After Carynne started having doubts recently, she wanted to meet her father alone, but she had gotten distracted by her anger. It was so hard to wake up at dawn that she would punch her pillows and rip up documents.


    Why didnt her father remarry. Why did she already have so many things to do when she was only seventeen years old.


    She had no outlet for these frustrations. She just wanted to find a reason or a way to die or live. Her daily life was so <i>tedious</i>.


    As Carynne approached the carriage, Tom climbed down from the coachmans seat. He was wearing a coachmans uniform, which was shortened so that it would fit him. As though he was a doll, it suited him well.


    Not bad. Tom was at the right age to be a carriage footman. However, Toms adorable face quite offended Ise Evans.


    Carynne, are you going to take <i>that?</i>


    Yes. This is his job.


    Then Ill ride a horse instead of going into the carriage.


    Ise.


    The carriage is stuffy.


    <i>Huu.</i> Carynne sighed as she saw Tom bowing to hide his face. Even so, it wouldnt be right for her to side with Tom here.


    Carynne guided Ise to the stable. Tom still couldnt lift his head.


    Oh my gosh The horses are wonderful.


    With the white horses lined up in a row, Ises eyes suddenly sparkled. That unique animal stench was still there, however. No matter how well they were managed, it pervaded through the air.


    The smell is going to stick to my clothes.


    It was unpleasant, but Ise didnt seem to care. It was as though her nose wasnt working.


    Seeing her like that, Carynne figured that <i>he</i> was somewhere around. So, she followed Ises gaze, and just as she expected, Raymond was there.


    How is it possible that he could be so handsome.


    Yes, yes, I see.


    Carynne turned her gaze towards Raymond. The sunlight streaming down through the stable window made his blond hair glow. And as he was talking to the stableman about the horses, his voice could be heard clearly even as the horses made various sounds. Neighing, stomping, eating.


    Look at this. Maybe he was better suited than Dun at preaching. With his face, height, physique and voice as perfect as thatas though he was a well-disciplined actorpeople might even mistake him as a mythical god walking onnd.


    This was why Carynne felt a little sorry for Ise. This uncontroble passion and longing seemed to be more like veneration rather than love. And apart from that, she recalled how, in all one hundred years, Ise had never be the object of his affection.


    Really


    Carynne watched as the other young woman couldnt take her eyes off him. Yes, Raymond was handsome. However, it was more amusing to watch the face of a maiden who was staring at him.


    She had already gotten so tired of looking at his face for decades upon end.


    And I wonder. How will that face change.

 Chapter 33

    Chapter 33


    Ah.


    Lord Raymond is looking at me.


    He turned to face thedies. There was still some distance between them, but his green eyes were vivid. That gaze was burdensome. Ise coveted that gaze, but Carynne was only left ufortable by it.


    He recalled what happenedst time. And the attitude Carynne showed him back then The corners of his lips went up. He smiled, chuckled, made a strange expression, bowed slightly and then focused on the conversation once more.


    Is he being shy?


    Yes.


    Carynne didnt think that was it, but she still answered patiently.


    Ise had yet to direct any hostility towards her in earnest. However, the despair and frustration that would sprout were sometimes stronger than her jealousy that made her ufortable.


    Though in Carynnes case, this difort was a new feeling for her, so she didnt necessarilyfort Ise. Because of this jealousy,


    Ise had yet to show any hostility towards her in earnest. However, rather Ises mncholy and envy, what made Carynne ufortable was her despair.


    But even this despair was a new stimulus for Carynne, so she didnt necessarily soothe Ise. Because of that envy, Ise was keeping a close friendship with Carynne and this would lead to bullying that at least wouldnt be akin to torture, but at the same time, it wasnt that close of a friendship that theyd go as far as holding a double wedding together. Just a so-and-so friendship.


    This tension was felt little by little by everyone in the mansion. Problems between men and women were also enjoyable to witness. Giggling to herself, Carynne looked around at the horses. The adult horses were all white and glossy.


    How much would you sell them for?


    The horses arent for sale. Theyre presented as gifts every now and again.


    Certainly If the horses are of this variety, the cost of breeding them alone would be considerable. I wouldnt even take them outside. Im very envious.


    Most of the Hare households horses became pure white once they became adults, so Ise quite liked them. Their coats were white and they were smart, and it could be said that these horses could only be seen in fairytales.


    Theyre pretty and have good physiques. If its like this, really, you should put them up in an auction house. The profits would really be


    Ises gaze continued to hover towards Raymond. As if the subject of her words werent the horses but that man himself. Carynne quickly replied to Ise, who looked as though shed be drooling any moment now.


    Its amazing that you know a lot, Ise.


    Barring the problem with Raymond, would Ise even be able to have a proper rtionship with him? Carynne was curious about that. Ises biggest drawback to her character was her tactlessness, which sometimes annoyed even Carynne.


    Miss Evans, youre quite interested in horses, arent you? Are you interested in horseback riding as well?


    Ise had pretended to look at the horses only as she gradually inched closer to Raymond. There, Raymond spoke to Ise and asked like this. While her attention was focused on him, Carynne slipped away.


    Hm? Oh, yes. Im confident in my horseback riding skills. Ive heard from others since I was young that I have a talent for it


    That much self-esteem didnt sound good to hear. Ise didnt have much of a grasp on how rtionships worked. Carynne clicked her tongue.


    Anyway, as she was witnessing this for the hundredth repetition, Carynne waited inside the carriage as Ise continued to blush while bragging to Raymond.


    At this point of the plotline, Carynne wasnt meant to know how to ride horses just yet. Besides that, Ise boasted of her horseback riding skills, so she couldnt understand how Carynne preferred riding a carriagefortably instead of riding a horse by herself. If theres something she could brag about


    Well, from inside the carriage, the scenery outside the window as they passed through the road towards the hunting grounds was beautiful to see.


    While Raymond was being held up by Ise, Carynne did her job and supervised the servants who were carrying all the luggage. The entire day would be spent on the hunt, maybe even a few days to catch some game. They would need to return to the mansion ande back to the hunting grounds a few times. On the other hand, the hunters would have to remain there, thats why Carynne also had to check the number of bullets and traps.


    Actually, the person who needed to work more here was Xenon, but he was just sitting next to the coachmannot the horsesmoking and chattingfortably. Rather than animals for the sacrificial ritual, Carynne nced at the trap and wished that they would just catch some foxes. Thete autumn in the city was quite chilly, so it was going to be a trend to wear fur over ones rtively thin clothes.


    Do we have enough traps?


    Oh, uh, yes. More than enough.


    Then thats no good.


    Ah No, theres just enough.


    Then thats a relief.


    When Carynne asked Xenon about the traps, he panicked as he replied. She looked through the bullets and the packed lunches, then she gave the signal for departure. The coachman beckoned to Tom, who in turn approached the man. Fortunately for him, the coachman thought that he was cute. The same with Xenon.


    It was a pure affection for children. When Carynne said that she was going to take Tom under her custody, she recalled how disgusted one maid looked, though the maid tried to hide it. Carynne felt that such a reaction was strange. Did people feel differently if it was the same gender? But there was no such feeling between herself and Ise.


    * * *


    Ah The carriage step is broken.


    So you didnt take care of it properly?


    Its not a surprising fact to Carynne, but the coachman scratched his head and just kept saying, That cant be true He mumbled one excuse after another. Carynne didnt listen.


    Ah.


    Carynne looked at the empty space in front of her. There was no hand waiting there. Originally, Raymond would havee to help her into the carriage. Even if he wasnt her fianc, it felt strange. She had never <i>not</i> been helped into the carriage. Its a little unpleasant.


    But why?


    She was sure that shed enjoy this change. Carynne felt displeased by the fact that she <i>got</i> displeased. Raymond was not by her side. And it wasnt because of her own choice.


    Carynne beckoned and called Tom, who was standing some distance away. Since Raymond wasnt here, she should at least use her little carriage footman at a time like this. Even so, Carynne sighed as she looked at the boy who was smaller than her. She should just get help from the coachman.


    Tom, go and get to Larry.


    Tom?


    Should he just lie there in front of you?


    A cold voice spoke out from behind.


    Sir Raymond?


    He wasnt looking at Carynne. The icy stare was directed at Tom, not her. Whats wrong with him? He never even spoke to the boy before this. Tom flinched and bowed his head low.


    Youre being slow.


    And here, Tom understood faster than Carynne did. She btedly realized what Raymond had said just now.


    Tomy down on his hands and knees at the base of the carriage entrance. His shoulders were shaking minutely because of the tension.


    Why though. Carynne looked at the knight because she couldnt understand what was happening at this moment. Raymond then turned to meet her gaze. Both gazes did not waver.


    Go ahead, Catherine Hare.


    He offered his hand to support her. This knight was urging her to step on a nine-year-old child.


    Go up now.


    Carynne took Raymonds hand. She tried to step on Tom, but instead, she brought her foot higher and stepped directly onto the carriage floor. Even if Raymond was doing something right now that he hadnt ever done before, Carynne also had to adjust as much as possible. He must already have a crush on her.


    When Carynne tried to step forward, she stumbled slightly. Raymond supported her again and lifted her up.


    Thank you.


    My pleasure.


    Receiving her thanks, Raymond smiled and closed the carriage door. While he was <i>inside</i>.


    After hoisting Carynne up into the carriage, he went ahead and got in as well. This was something that he shouldnt be doing, especially when his fiance was right outside.


    Its not time for us to have this kind of rtionship just yet, right?


    At a loss for words, Carynne asked.


    What about Miss Ise?


    She said she likes riding on horseback. Since she likes it so much, I thought it would be considerate to let her enjoy it.


    Whoop-de-doo.


    She could easily imagine what kind of face Ise would makeshe had definitely turned bright red. Carynne was too scared to look out the window. Forget the tar that would have gotten poured over her headter. She should just expect rotten food now.


    Theres plenty of space here, so Im hoping you wont kick me out.


    Sir Raymond. Wouldnt it be better for you to ride on horseback instead?


    I dont know how to ride a horse.


    But youre a knight? Carynne was rendered speechless by his smile.


    The military these days Is it alright that soldiers dont know how to ride a horse?


    Try licking your lips before lying like that. Raymond smiledfortably anyhow.


    Im a bit shy, so I cant ride horses that I havent seen before.


    Suuure.


    Im an introvert, you see.


    Apparently so.

 Chapter 34

    Chapter 34


    <b>Chapter 34</b>


    <i>content warning: mentions of war and carynnes callous thoughts on the matter. given the state of current events, i thought i should mention it here first.</i>


    Do call me Carynne. I rarely go by the name Catherineits awkward. Thats my mothers middle name.


    Okay.


    Watching him act more familiarly with her, Carynne smiled reluctantly and looked out the window.


    Raymond was the kind of person who would treat someone else casually right away. While thinking of how she had fallen so foolishly in love with him before, she stiffened up. It was Raymond, this remarkably chatty guy. He was someone who was in no such position to be that waysomeone who had no need to make jokes at his own expense.


    The weather is nice, Raymond noted.


    Carynne set aside the scope covering her eyes as she looked at Raymond, the one tainted with her previous memories of him. The topic he brought up just now, 7 points.


    Looking down at Raymonds clothes, she saw that he was wearing a deep navy hunting outfit, the top and trousers matching nicely. She wondered who picked that for him.


    It seems so. Do you like the summer, Sir Knight?


    I like all the seasons except the winter.


    Winter at the White Mountains is quite harsh, I believe.


    <i>It was terribly cold.</i>


    She recalled a distant past, them both lying in bed together, when Raymond once confided in her with a hushed voice.


    <i>At one point, I wanted to cut my fingers off. Everywhere I looked, I could only see the white expanse. I thought that it might be better if I bled.</i>


    He said so as he lifted a lock of Carynnes bright red hair, giving it a kiss.


    <i>I truly love the color of your hair.</i>


    You know about it very well, Lady.


    * * *


    Women should have somece else they could go. We just sit inside the house and either listen to others with strained ears or read books.


    Carynne shrugged.


    These are dangerous times. Its better to stay cooped in a safe ce.


    It was a dangerous time to live. Even now, wars were still being waged in the countries beyond the White Mountains, but this country they were living in had nothing to do with that war. Rather, Carynne wondered if she could soothe her boredom more if shed get caught up in the war despite being far away from it. If shed say these thoughts aloud, Raymond would surely be angered.


    In the end, it was someone elses business. It had nothing to do with her since it was so far away.


    During an afternoon like this, she was supposed to be embroidering, watching the dust dancing in the air that looked like golden specks beneath the sunlight. She didnt care about the people who were suffering beyond that mountain range. Whatever those peoples names were or however their faces looked like, right now, they were all nothing but entertainment for her. Whether this entertainment came in the form ofedy or tragedy, they both weighed the same in the end.


    Even if she hadnt verbalized these musings to him, this was how Carynne thought. In fact, the whispers of opinions that could be heard at the countess salon were something that held more weight for her. The war that Raymond had participated in was not honorable, and neither was it a war that affected the majority of this country.


    When the countries at the other side of the mountain range had gotten backed into a corner, they asked for support, and so soldiers were pushed to the battlefront. The army that Raymond had been part of was one that people did not care about, whether they lived or ended up dying.


    The army wasposed of these people for the most part: third or fourth sons of aristocratic families, sons of fallen nobility who were now part of the middle ss, young men who wanted to use this war as an opportunity to rise through the ranks, men of the lower ss who needed aid because they had no other means of earning money. This country sent troops like that, just the bare minimum in order to save face and say that they <i>did</i> send aid to that foreign war.


    Verdic profited greatly from this war. Countess Lawton secretly gained exclusive mining rights, and Baron Norring had set up arge-scale gambling den where people could bet on the battles being fought. This country held that war with only this much regardonly this much weight. The tragedy was only to that extent for them.


    However Raymond, someone who was directly involved in this, refused to think in the same way. He didnt want to be told that the war he was fighting in was for the benefit and for saving the face of only such a few. Carynne decided to give him props for at least that.


    She bowed her head.


    It is through the knights hard work that the people of thisnd can continue living in peace. Thank you.


    If she didnt think so, then it would be unbearable.


    <i>I only hope that the peoples deaths would not be in vain.</i>


    Unbearable for this man who was too much the epitome of a knight.


    <i>Thats why</i>


    Keeping her head bowed down, Carynne organized her thoughts.


    How much was he suspecting her?


    How far did she say that night. What did he see. At what point did he start watching her. Did she say something useless. She shouldnt have let her face be seen. Was it a good decision to get Tom? Why didnt she just stay still that day.


    Doubt festered further the moment it had started taking root. Like ink poured into water. While Carynne couldnt be sure that Raymond had genuinely fallen for her like he did in the past, it was the same for Raymondhe wouldnt be able to think that she had genuinely fallen for him either. What that doubt was, when exactly this suspicion started. She didnt know.


    <i>You truly know me well.</i>


    <i>This expression of yours, too. I know it well.</i>


    Why did you do that?


    Do what?


    Why did you tell me to step on Tom?


    Carynne raised her head to look at Raymond. However, what could be seen on her face was only the well-manufactured smile of a nobledy whose sanity was seemingly intact.


    That wasnt directed towards you.


    Then, to Tom?


    That child seems to be harboring some sort of illusion. Carynne, I agree with Verdics opinion on the matter. Its better not to keep a rtionship where grudges could form.


    If thats what youre concerned about, then I think it has already been formed.


    But I can ovee it with love. Grudges through good will, malice through forgiveness. Carynne repeated her words.


    The look in your eyes seems to convey how unimpressed you are by good will. If you wish to be kind, then why dont you send him to the kitchen?


    Wont the kitchen be more dangerous for him?


    When Carynne giggled, Raymond turned his gaze slightly to the side. At the end of his gaze was that boy.


    Staring out the window of the carriage, Raymond spoke once more.


    I do not know what kind of work hell do in your household, but boys are bound to grow stronger at a fast rate. He will be stronger than you in just four years.


    Hell die in a month though. It doesnt matter.


    If someone is destined to die, shouldnt there be a cause for that death? Thank you for the good will that youve expressed, however I do not wish to reverse a decision I already made, and so quickly as well. Lets stop talking about this, Sir Raymond.


    Carynne cut off the conversation right there, ncing sideways to gauge Raymonds reaction. Fortunately, he didnt seem offended. As she safely yed the role of a good-natured youngdy, Carynne let out a small exhale.


    This reminded her of a simr conversation. Tom worked as an odd-jobs boy or a dishwasher several times before in past iterations. Whenever that happened, Raymond would always tell her not to do anything unnecessarybut unlike the words he spoke, he would admire Carynne for her kind-heartedness.


    <i>Its because, on the battlefield, theres no one I can trust.</i>


    <i>Thats why you have to look forward to it even more.</i>


    She remembered the slight mncholy that could be seen on his face.


    <i>Peoples good will, their forgiveness and anything like it. You must look forward to them even more. If its possible to forgive the enemy, shouldnt it be the same withrades? Even love is possible, perhaps.</i>


    It was what he desperately longed for. And Carynne was enough for the role he yearned. A beautiful girl who always forgives, always loves, always warmly faces him. Nevertheless, a woman who was of decent rank, but still in a position that needed his help.


    <i>I will remember you in the next life.</i>


    <i>You cant. Its already the th time with you.</i>


    Is there something on my face?


    Im just looking at you because youre handsome.


    I see.


    It was futile.


    Even though she matched as he wanted, he never gave her the answer she wished to hear. Not in life, not in death. In the past, she thought that this man would save heras if he was the very sun that rose high above the deep ocean, she looked towards Raymond in such a way.


    But the one who will save Carynne wasnt Raymond. The sun was just that. The sun. Time moved forward. The sun would rise, the sun would set. It did not even move through the help of a gods carriage, and neither was it a deitys eye.


    The sun just produced light and heat, and that very light was too far away to reach for a creature living in the deepest parts of the sea.


    Nevertheless, this time again, Carynne will y the role he wants out of her. And to give him the gift of death.


    Were almost there.


    It seems so.


    While getting off the carriage, Carynne almost fell this time while trying not to step on Tom. Feeling Raymonds gaze on her, she hoped that her actions could somehow cover up those doubts he had about her. And, with years of experience, she was convinced that he was already attracted to her.


    After that, it was a trivial matter to receive the piercing gaze of Ise, who arrived on horseback while her eyes were swollen. At this point, Raymond cared little about her already.

 Chapter 35

    Chapter 35


    <i>Tak, tak.</i> Verdic organized the documents in his hands and calcted.


    The budget went over a lot more than I thought.


    He didnt know he had such a passionate side to him. He got so worked up that he spent more than whats supposed to be the budget. As things turned out like this, the only one whod benefit would be Fief Lord Hare.


    <i>Tch.</i> Verdic clucked his tongue and looked over the funds that hed be able to pull out right away.


    This is a bit too much.


    The fief lord himself bemoaned the fact, his wrinkles deepening.


    Our domains residents dont need to do this much. We wont be able to recover the principal capital that youll be spending.


    Even that slow-witted fief lord noticed that he got carried away. Verdic inwardly felt foolish for his own actions. Still, there was an alternative.


    Although he hadnt told Ise yet, this was a good opportunity to attract the countess attention. Shed be out on vacation at a ce about a day away by carriage from the fief. And if a noblewoman of her level woulde, then it was no different from an endorsement of Ise and Raymonds engagement.


    What should we do about this?


    Well Isnt it too early to tell?


    What would be too early to tell when I have your permission, Your Lordship. It would be endlessly delightful. With a timely asion such as this, wouldnt it be great to do it together with you?


    Although its clear whos acting as the guest and the host here in this situation, Verdic tried to at least ask with courtesy. Fortunately, the fief lord shook his head.


    No, its still too early to tell. But I wish your daughter all the best.


    Thank you.


    As the fief lord stroked his chin, he looked over the proposal document. He didnt have much to do with it. Ah, no, he had a symbolic role in it. The problem here was keeping up with his mood.


    Even so, the fief lord already knew that he wasnt in any position to oppose. Verdic also knew this.


    Verdic ced a hand on the fief lords shoulder. It was quite an impertinent action considering the difference in their social status, but the fief lord did not point this out. No, he <i>wouldnt</i> be able to reprimand the other man.


    At this point, Verdic already held greater authoritypared to the fief lord. Both men were aware of this. So, Verdic found this situation to be interesting.


    It will be alright.


    On the festivals final day, with the fief lords blessing, the residents of this territory woulde to know who the <i>real</i> ruler was.


    Verdic recalled his daughters crying face. Then, he also recalled her smiling face.


    Raymond would <i>have</i> to be engaged with Ise.


    * * *


    Ise crouched behind a tree where people wouldnt see her, sniffling to herself. Her nose was stinging, perhaps because she had steered the horse too fast while she was riding it. Taking in a deep breath, she tried to calm herself.


    Hiic


    It still felt like she was about to cry, but she had to keep herself together.


    However, apart from feeling like this, she was also so very angry that Raymond didnt go on horseback side by side with Ise, instead riding a carriage with Carynne.


    That bitch.


    Ise bit her lower lip. That bitch who flirted with another womans man. Raymond was <i>Ises</i> fianc. Even though they still had yet to hold an official engagement ceremony, Raymond was set to be engaged to Ise, just as they had promised each other.


    Just how much of his familys debt did Ises father write off for Raymond? Even if their union was decided for them by the adults while they were still children, she knew that even if he didnt express himself, he had already gotten used to her so far. He treated Ise with respect and sent gifts during her birthdays and whenever there was a special day.


    He was a popr man with other people regardless of gender or age, but he left behind no scandals. This fact alone was a greatfort to Ise.


    <i>Im the only one whos meant to marry him.</i>


    It was alright for Ise if he wouldnt hold her hand when there was no one else around, and if he was home from work, he wouldnt need to seek her out especially. She reiterated that she would have no problems with anything he did for as long as he would marry her and that the <i>only</i> woman who would stay by his side was herself.


    But why was Raymond acting so openly close with that woman, and in <i>front</i> of Ise?


    It cant be.


    Ise was in agony. Carynne Hare was evidently beautiful, even to Ise, a fellow woman. After she heard that Raymond saved Carynne while she had faced some danger, Ise couldnt help but keep looking between them with anxious eyes.


    Raymond would always smile so broadly in front of Carynne, and he did it so often, too. And strangely, he spent more time with Carynne rather than Ise.


    Today, Ise put on her equestrian outfit and went on horseback just so she could ride together with Raymond instead of a carriage. But after arriving at this mansion, it bothered her so much that Raymond was spending more time with Carynne than Ise. And more than that, Raymond went by carriage with Carynne rather than going on horseback beside Ise.


    Carynne seduced him, she was sure of it.


    What did they talk about in the carriage? What did they do?


    Ise was so worried. Various scenarios that she didnt want to imagine kept lingering in her head.


    It will all be over within today.


    Dont be so sure about that. It usually takes a week to catch em. Youre bluffing now, but arent you just being shy?


    Ise heard their voices from afar.


    She wanted to jump in between them right away, but she instead hid behind the tree again because she knew just how swollen her eyes were. Then, she took a deep breath.


    Just go embrace that stuttering fianc of yours!


    Ise wanted to yell this at her. Wasnt he the best guy for someone like Carynne? Why didnt that mane with Carynne today.


    Ise burst out in indignation at each and everything thats happening.


    * * *


    These traps arent enough, are they?


    Please donte closer. Its dangerous.


    Carynne eyed the traps as he talked to Xenon, not Raymond. Ise just continued eavesdropping behind the same tree because it was still difficult for her toe out right away.


    This trap looks too small Will this really be enough, I wonder.


    This is enough. As long as the ankle gets caught, we can just shoot it down after that. If the games too big, then the other ones would notice and wont allow themselves to get caught.


    Dont forget that they will be for the ritual. You have to catch them without injuring them as much as possible.


    Hell I forgot about that. Ill do my best.


    Carynne seemed to be fully engrossed in the traps. Ise wasnt so interested in hunting, so it was strange for her to watch Carynne check each trap or gun out there.


    Hunting wasnt something women did. Ise herself was a rtively active woman, and she also enjoyed horseback riding and fox hunting, but she didnt fully participate in a full-scale hunt.


    The men would go out and catch some game, and if they would present women with the fur from their game, it would be considered as a highpliment. Or, it was also enough to have the maids prepare a meal out of the meat. However, it seemed like Carynne was interested in the hunt itself.


    Once the territory has been turned over, should I also pay attention to that?


    Ise nced at Carynne, who continued to ask about this and that. Right now, Carynne was acting her role as the fief lords daughter, but sooner orter, that responsibility would be Ises. It seemed like, once they had bought off the territory from the fief lord, Verdic was content just giving Ise the seat of a madam for show. But Ise thought differently.


    They needed to be gradually kicked out.


    The more she saw Carynne, the firmer this decision became in her mind. Carynne Hare shouldnt be allowed to remain in this ce. If a woman like that would continue to stay by Ises side, then the possibility of losing Raymond was high.


    Even if Raymond was a man of sincerity, what kind of man <i>wouldnt</i> fall for Carynne if shed set her mind to actively seducing him?


    Ise was frightened of Carynne, and that woman even kept appearing in her dreams. Was it because shed been ovee with jealousy?


    Slowly but surely, Carynne invaded her thoughts.


    How unpleasant.

 Chapter 36

    Chapter 36


    Ise, what are you doing over there?


    N-Nothing.


    Ise got startled when Carynne called out to her, but at the same time, she came to her senses and quickly jumped out from behind the tree. She had been so deeply immersed in her thoughts that she didnt notice other people passing by.


    Where did Sir Raymond go?


    He went on to the forest along with the other men for the hunt. Its been a while since he left. Have you just been there this whole time? We were looking for you earlier.


    Something like that.


    Lies.


    No matter how much Ise had been far from them, theres no way she wouldnt hear her if she was being called. It was obvious that Carynne left Ise alone to increase the time she could wag her tail at Raymond.


    As Ise nced at Carynne, she walked forward to stand beside her.


    <i>You think I dont know what youre up to?</i>


    Without noticing Ise staring a hole at the back of her head, Carynne was inspecting the traps around her while also checking the table setting of the maids. Ise approached Carynne.


    So it seems youre interested in hunting, Miss Carynne.


    Yes, though not that much The mountainous region here is dense, so there are many animals that could be hunted. Even if we make all the preparations we can every year, theres always some people getting hurt at the festivalsrge-scale hunt.


    What kind of animals are there?


    All kinds of ones. Bears, wolves, foxes At this time of the year, the bears are very irritable, so you have to be adept at hunting them. A lot of people have fallen victim to bear attacks.


    Then isnt this ce a dangerous area, too?


    Ise suddenly felt a chill as she looked around her surroundings. The forest was thick, and it was dark around them like it was already nighttime. The trees were numerous and there was no visible path.


    Where Carynne and Ise were, the trees had been cut to create a clearing, but Ise was suddenly so worried that a bear mighte out of the dark and attack them.


    Its alright. Weve set up enough traps and there are plenty of people here to protect us. Its not that dangerous. Even animals donte out when they can sense danger.


    The animals were nothing to worry about since they also tended to avoid people. Carynne assured Ise like this, but she couldnt hide her apprehension when Raymond wasnt here beside her.


    All the attendants and maids here were Carynnes people, not Ises.


    Even so, Ise willed herself to be braver. She knew that being anxious would just fuel her rampant imagination.


    If the animalse, theyll be caught in the traps right away. You have nothing to be scared about.


    Carynne smiled at Ise. And Ise didnt like seeing this. It seemed like Carynne was looking down at her from a higher ce.


    Soon, Ise turned around and walked through the bushes. She wanted to arrange her clothes. She was feeling stuffy because the corset she had beneath her equestrian outfit was too tight. She needed to at least loosen the knot at the end.


    Im not scared.


    I see. Still, dont go out too far.


    Carynne, stop trying to poke your nose into other peoples business! Ise shrieked out of frustration.


    If you go any further, your ankle will get chopped right off.


    !


    Ise stopped in her tracks. A snare was right in front of her on the ground.


    Why didnt you tell me that first? How How dangerous!


    I told you just now though?


    Carynne shrugged. But Ise couldnt evenugh it off. The des of the trap were so sharp that her ankle really could have gotten snapped off. Certainly, she could have lost her foot.


    How can Carynne be so s about this? But it was difficult for Ise to talk to the other people around. All the maids looked at the two young women side by side, a pitiful look directed at her.


    Ill fix my clothes in the carriage.


    Alright. Ill help you.


    Carynne followed Ise into the carriage. Ise didnt like it, but there was no other choice.


    <i>Ka-chak.</i>


    The carriage door was shut behind them, and now Carynne was behind Ise. Carynnes fingers unfastened the sp behind Ises equestrian suit. As she was undressed slowly, one finger touched her back.


    It felt <i>terrible.</i>


    Cold fingers touched her back. Strangely, Ise felt that Carynnes touch was unpleasant despite how careful it was. It felt like worms were crawling on her skin.


    Why did she despise Carynne so much? Was it because Raymond showed that much interest in her? Of course, that would only be natural. But that didnt exin the goosebumps rising over her skin right now.


    Ise, should I redo the ties of your corset?


    Yes, please do so.


    Ise endured.


    Perhaps its because its that time of the month. Ise had a particrly severe case of period pains. Just yesterday, she suffered from headaches and some pain in her lower back. Of course, she also suffered from abdominal cramps throughout her period. It was like that now, too.


    Please, a bit more gently.


    Yeees.


    Its strange.


    Ise had goosebumps all over.


    Ise had a regr menstrual cycle. And that time was soon. Its natural for her to suffer from premenstrual syndrome, and she was familiar with the symptoms.


    But when she thought of that day, she recalled the blood that <i>shouldnt</i> have been there yet.


    <i>Theres blood on your bed and your skirt though?</i>


    Wait.


    Ise didnt think much of it because this was what Carynne said. It looked like Ise made a mistake. It happened so suddenly that she couldnt ask about it. Did Carynne really see blood on her skirt? But


    All done.


    Ises skirt had blood on it, the bed had blood on it, but her undergarments somehow didnt have it. It was during that night when Ise saw the corpse of the ck maidno, when she thought she saw the corpse. She had tried not to think about it deeply while she stared at her cleanly washed skirt.


    But still, Ise couldnt get rid of this nagging feeling. At that time, Ise also thought that she was having period cramps, but the next day, there was no trace of it on her clothes. That time also didnt align with her menstrual cycle. She had convinced herself that it was period blood, but it actually was not.


    That blood wasnt her own blood. It was someone elses, and it had soaked her clothes and bed entirely.


    She couldnt even say it was <i>just </i>someone elsesthere could only be one person. That woman named Nancy, the one who had always been with Carynne before.


    Carynne, um How is Donna? The new maid whos attending to you.


    Donna?


    Carynne tilted her head to the side, looking genuinely perplexed. But soon, a smile graced her features.


    Shes a good kid.


    Why?


    Ise couldnt understand. That woman was the maid who was in charge of her before and was with her all day long. When she woke up in the morning, that made would be there to help her dress up and essorize. The maid would help with every little thing while she was next to her master, until it was time for bed.


    But allegedly, at that awkward dinner, Carynne conveyed how sad she was that Nancy suddenly left like that. That was the first time Ise officially heard that Nancy had disappeared.


    Why was Carynne fine?


    The woman remained by her side all day, all throughout the years suddenly disappeared without saying anything. But then Carynne changed maids just like that without kicking up a fuss? Ise raised such amotion when only one ne had gone missing. Of course, she would have done more if one of her maids disappeared. Because that maid belonged to Ise. The maid was her property.


    Donnas quite nice and cute.


    While smiling, Carynne opened the carriage door. The attendant who was standing outside helped her out. In a daze, Ise stared nkly at Carynnes back.


    The maid, whod done nothing but take care of Carynne for such a long time, suddenly disappeared, and she didnt care.


    Carynne was kind even to that clumsy new maid of hers, so it didnt make sense that she could be so cold. She was kind to everyone, even to the servants. But why Why did it seem like she absolutely didnt care about Nancys disappearance?


    Ises insides felt all twisted up.

 Chapter 37

    Chapter 37


    You smell like blood.


    Dun was lounging in a chair as he frowned at Carynne. During the seven days connected to the festival, he would pick up one sacrificial offering per day, slit its throat, let it bleed out, then set it on fire in front of the public.


    Unlike him, who had the mixed smell of blood and medicine wafting around him, Carynne seemed radiant. With a displeased look directed at Carynne, Dun spoke.


    Y-You seem to be free.


    Because Sir Raymond is such a capable man.


    Carynne shrugged as she saw the gutted rabbit in front of Dun.


    During festival season, a priest was to take on the role of a butcher. How ironic it was for a devout believer to smear blood on his hands in the name of showing gratitude towards God.


    The preparations for the sacrificial ritual, which seemed to go on forever, ended sooner than expected. The preparation period was expected to be at about two weeks, but it ended in three days due to thebined efforts of Raymond and Xenon.


    Carynne had nned to meet her father during this preparation period and find some traces of Nancy, but she had to give up on this because of the unexpected change in the schedule.


    <i>On the fourth day of water, Ise and Raymonds engagement ceremony shall be held.</i>


    This new agenda on the schedule turned the entire mansion upside down. The work had blown up several times over, and the hired hands and the maids were all practically running here and there. An engagement ceremony was to be held along with the festival, though even without the ceremony, the festival was already cropping up to be grander than that of recent years.


    The engagement was something that Carynne didnt expect. She couldnt believe that Ise and Raymond were getting engaged <i>this soon</i>. Not once did this ever happen before.


    Maybe it was Ises whining towards Verdic that did it, maybe it wasnt, but it was exciting for Carynne to think that she somehow caused this to happen.


    Nancys death made Ise grow terrified and Raymonds cold shoulder exacerbated her anxiety, so Verdic was then tasked to take up a hundred-year-old effort to soothe his daughter. But more than that, there was something else thats more exciting.


    Do you feel that its a shame hes going to be married?


    Kinda.


    Carynne giggled as she rubbed Duns shoulder for a moment, then wrapped her arms around his neck in an embrace.


    Isnt he handsome? Hes talented, too. And rich.


    She tightened her hold on him. She wondered if she could strangle him to death like this.


    Though of course, her offhand expectations were dampened soon enough, and Dun didnt even need to exert much force to do so.


    To the shame of Carynnes efforts, Dun easily loosened Carynnes hold. She put a lot of power into it, but really, theres a huge difference in strength between a man and a woman.


    I cant believe you refused my embrace. Im sad.


    Crazy.


    Dun said this, though it didnt seem like hes totally displeased. Dun seemed strangely more rxed nowpared to how he was in past iterations, even when they had gotten married. Carynne didnt like this very much.


    Itsughable howcent men be the moment they manage to sleep with women.


    Carynne wanted him to show a bit more jealousy. Or maybe the reason hes like this was because of Raymond and Ises engagement? If thats so, then this change in schedule was just all the more unpleasant to Carynne.


    On the fourth day of ashes, the body must be k-kept clean.


    Excuse me, what are you expecting? Carynne strangled Dun tightly. A weak groan came out of his lips.


    Urk.


    You dont seem to have any gray hairs.


    Y-You, really.


    She wanted him to cling to her more. But still,pared to Duns jealousy, Carynne had something else ted thats more interesting. Raymond was just finishing his work quietly, so while thats happening, she could search her fathers study for any traces of Nancy.


    This was even more exciting than Raymonds engagement.


    Arent you the one ying hooky? Anyway, Fathers so busy that his schedule wont permit even a short meeting. Ask him to give me some time. He doesnte out during mealtimes either, so how else can I see him?


    His Lordship is busy.


    Then give me the key to his study.


    Why?


    Helen said she doesnt have it. How is it possible that the housekeeper doesnt have it, hm?


    T-The study should be open right now.


    Not that study. Fathers private study. Not the one thats openI heard he has another one.


    Touching his forehead, Dun frowned.


    Why are you going there?


    Carynne had an answer prepared, so she responded without any hesitation.


    I want to see a portrait of my mother. The entire mansions devoid of any of her portraits.


    If things go missing


    What kind of delusion are you thinking when this is <i>my </i>house?


    Dun looked away, but soon took out a key from the drawer of his desk and gave it to her. Looking at it, Carynne thought that it might be difficult to replicate because of howplicated its structure was. As Dun stared at her, Carynne immediately lowered the key and asked him.


    Are you going on a ughter-fest tomorrow, too?


    That Dont talk about the ceremony like that. How insincere, absurd


    Sorry.


    Carynne cut him off with a short apology. Dun tried to continue, but he soon gave up on his sermon and moved on.


    T-To be exact, itll be tomorrow onwards. Today, the sacrificial rites of grain will be held.


    Then whats that?


    Practice.


    The stench is no joke. Seriously, go and wash up right now. Im going out tomorrow. Thats what I came here to say. Im going with Raymond and Miss Ise. Ah, I mean <i>Sir</i> Raymond. Dont use the cherry wood carriage. Were using it tomorrow.


    Youre qu, ite familiar with him.


    Are you jealous?


    Come on.


    But against Carynnes expectations, Dun just frowned and criticized Carynne.


    I-Id like it if you dont treat this matter so simply. Have some sense, Carynne Hare. Miss Evans is also preparing for her engagement.


    Shes the one who asked me to open up my schedule for her though.


    Of course, this was a lie. Ise asked Carynne about some good spots to go to during the festival, but she never asked Carynne toe with her. They nned to go there together, but also agreed toe back separately.


    Then, this would give Carynne the chance to slip away and go back to the manor alone, and it would be easy for her to roam around. Telling Dun that shed be out was more convenient for Carynne.


    Towards you? A favor?


    Dun turned around, looking at her as if he couldnt understand Ises request. There was a perplexed look on his face.


    Sir Raymond doesnt seem to like her at all, you see.


    Is that so?


    Its not to the extent that its apparent to other people. But theyre the people directly involved, so what could be done. Anyway, were going to the festival with Sir Raymond. Isnt it my duty to take care of our troubled guests? Getting those two closer together would be helpful to our fief, too.


    This would also spark the embers of sin.


    Then thats even better. Shrugging, Carynne grinned, and Dun no longer raised any objections. He was much too exhausted to do that.


    * * *


    No, but, why are you lot following me again?


    Huh? Mdy, Lord Dun said that I should apany you since youll be alone while Lord Raymond and Miss Ise will spend time together


    So damn annoying to the point of death.


    When Carynne frowned, Donna made a teary expression. Borwen averted his gaze and looked far away. Since its like this, it was going to be impossible for Carynne to slip away and go back to the mansion alone to search the study.


    That finicky little


    The Lord gave quite a lot of pocket money, Mdy.


    Carynne hit Borwens leg with her folded parasol.


    How many times have I told you. Dun isnt Fief Lord yet, is he?


    Donna took a step back, looking around.


    And <i>Im</i> thedy of the house. Dont make it sound like Duns the one giving me money.


    I-I apologize.


    The attendants were differentpared to the maids, perhaps because they werent under the directmand of thedy of the house, Carynne.


    Her time was cut short, and now she was being surveilled to boot. This couldnt go on.


    After rebuking Borwen, Carynne turned to Donna with a smile on her lips.


    Then, shall we pay Missus Deere a visit?

 Chapter 38

    Chapter 38


    This new coachman was determined not to repeat his predecessors mistakes. Carynne had no intention to cause a ruckus anyhow, so she was just sitting on her carriage seat quietly as they went towards Missus Deeres house. This seemed to make the servants feel even more uneasy.


    Im not going to run away.


    I dont believe you, Mdy.


    Gosh.


    She shook her head in resignation, and so too did Donna, but determinedly and with her lips closed shut.


    Tell me about Missus Deere.


    Mdy should know her better than I do.


    Yeah, that should be the case. Carynne twirled a lock of her hair with one finger.


    What can you tell me?


    All too soon, the carriage arrived at its destination. They were now Missus Deeres residence. She had to suffer so much just from trying to get herest time.


    It was a quaint little house, but it was too modest to be the house of a governess who once took charge of the fief lords daughter.


    Why is this ce so old?


    Mdy. Even still, its a pretty nice home, you know And its near the downtown area.


    But itll only be noisy being at a location like this.


    Its a convenient location. You wouldnt need to ride a carriage to go anywhere, and security is better here.


    Is that so But since theres so many people living around here, how is that more secure?


    People keep watch of each other, thats why.


    How is that different from just hiring many servants?


    Um Its The money that


    Unable to keep listening to the two girls who kept whispering to each other, Borwen spoke up.


    Lets head in.


    W-Wait.


    Borwen went ahead and knocked on the door without even waiting for Carynnes go ahead. An exhausted-looking maid came out and asked who it was, then her eyes soon widened before she hurried into the house. After a short while. A middle-aged woman came to the door.


    Donna was the first to greet her.


    Hello, Missus.


    This woman was Missus Deere? Carynne folded her parasol and raised the hem of her skirt slightly to curtsy. After the short greeting, Carynne looked at the woman from head to toe. She was someone she had never seen in any of the past timelines.


    She wasnt an important character, so whats the use here? It was a little discouraging that even the womans appearance was ordinary. Its nice for expectations to be broken, but encountering the unexpected wasnt always going to be satisfied with what shed see.


    Missus Deere was a plump middle-aged woman who had brown hair, flushed cheeks and a few gray streaks. The fact that she was so ordinary was whats so surprising. Her impression seemed to be the furthest from something like a secret or a conspiracy.


    Carynne?


    Yes


    Oh my goodness


    She was a middle-aged woman with a gentle demeanor. For a governess, she did look the part.


    Missus Deere rushed towards Carynne, running almost as fast as she could. Then, without even any time to speak, she pulled Carynne into an embrace.


    Carynne? Oh, it really is you.


    Carynne was so taken aback that she raised a hand to try and push away the woman, making her stop. The woman held her so tightly to the point that she couldnt breathe, but as she finally loosened her hold on Carynne, she looked at the younger woman with such emotion in her eyes. She took Carynnes hands and held them tight.


    Its been a while, hasnt it?


    Carynne had never met this woman before, so all she could do was smile.


    Do you remember me?


    It was a difficult question. This time, there really was nothing to do but smile, so she did.


    Its because we havent seen each other in such a long time.


    It hasnt been that long though.


    Donna also definitely said that it hadnt been long.


    Carynne.


    Yes, Missus Deere.


    You dont remember me.


    The missus spoke with a serious face. The womans demeanor of gentleness quickly froze. This look on her face certainly had a meaning behind it. Carynne couldnt respond.


    You still cant recall?


    Then, with a small voice that Donna and Borwen wouldnt be able to hear, she continued,


    Youve lost your memories, havent you.


    The simple sentence rang in her ears. Lost memories. The woman seemed to already know about it. What was she saying. Youve lost your memories. All the memories she had until now turned inside out.


    Who was this woman. Why was she saying something that Carynne had never heard of before. Did this woman know just how much shed affected Carynne with just those words.


    Come on in. Its been a while. Truly a while.


    Carynne followed the woman into the dark houses interior. The exterior looked old, but inside, everything looked neat. However, cleanliness could only go so far.


    If one were to take a closer look, the wallpaper was evidently faded, and the wooden floor creaked with every step. The sound made Carynne even more antsy. This was a ce she had never been to before. Its the first time shes seeing this. Everything was ufortable. Her mouth was dry. She was parched for tea.


    Bring out some tea, and the best teacups!


    When the missus shouted out this instruction, the maid hurriedly disappeared into the kitchen. Carynne turned to Borwen and Donna, who were just standing by the door.


    Donna, Borwen. Why dont you go out and enjoy the festival?


    Mdy, how can we trust you?


    Donna replied in a gruff tone.


    But Carynnes expression hardened. She didnt want to deal with them both right now. She couldnt afford to.


    We have a lot of catching up to do, privately. Its been so very long. Then you can just stay in the guest room for a while.


    Im sorry, Carynne, but theres no guest room. How about they stay together at the maids room instead?


    Looking over to the missus maid, whose clothes were dirty, Donna was appalled.


    A-Absolutely not. Id rather go to the market.


    Donna tly refused. Fortunately, Borwen grabbed Donnas shoulders and pulled her back before she could say anymore. Carynne made a mental note to tell Helen about Donnas behavior once they returned to the manor.


    Frowning, Carynne pointed towards the door for Borwen to see. <i>Get out.</i>


    Well be sure toe back around the time for afternoon tea. Donna, lets go.


    Hnng


    Lets <i>go</i>.


    As the two finally left, the missus maid came out with some tea and refreshments, her expression havinge undone. And the reason was immediately apparentthe teacups were of low quality.


    Missus Deere, still holding Carynnes hands, led her to the seats and sat down together. Carynne could now finally focus on the task at hand.


    Dont you remember who I am?


    Carynne thought, how much could she say to this woman? Carynne closed her mouth and blinked. She felt uneasy.


    I knew it. You became this way after Madam Hare had passed away. His Lordship is


    Whats this woman talking about now? Carynnes eyes stayed trained on Missus Deere. She had to ask.


    Why have you mentioned my mother?


    Her voice came out much sharper than she had intended.


    How much do you know?


    She hated that her question was answered with another question, but she was directed with only pity. Carynne took initiative and changed the way she worded it.


    Missus, Im just immensely at a loss right now.


    Carynne lowered her gaze. Considering the womans standing and how her house looked here, Missus Deere didnt seem to have gotten a proper pension from the fief lord.


    In general, if a governess was still single and hadnt yet married, she would be referred to another household if theyd been let go. Even more so if their position had been permanent. If there was no suitable ce, then its natural that she should have been given a pension. If not that, there were also some cases that shed continue living together at the household.


    However, looking at the condition of this house, it could be inferred that the missus did not go out of this house on a normal basis. Its obvious that some circumstances had led this former governess, who used to teach the only daughter of a fief lord, to live a life like this nowentirely out of the lords sight.


    I would like it if youd save me the effort of trying to fish it out of you and just tell me what you know.


    Ill tell you everything, as long as you tell me the extent of what <i>you</i> know.


    Missus.


    Even if Carynne was flustered right now, she had lived for a hundred years and had experience handling dozens of maids. So, Carynne widened her eyes and stared directly into Missus Deeres eyes.


    Ive lost my memories. Now, tell me what you know. I am terribly distressed. If you help me here, I shall surely repay you.


    Youre still the same.


    Missus Deere lowered her teacup and fidgeted with her fingers. She was nervous as well.


    Youve been like this ever since you were young.


    Then, she talked about a past that Carynne did not know about.

 Chapter 39

    Chapter 39


    You were a very bright child. You were smart, but Not to the point that you were a schr. Just that you were a little different from other noble children of your age. Perhaps its because Catherine was the one who raised you?


    Youre acquainted with my mother?


    Do you remember Catherine?


    Not quite No, I dont remember her at all.


    Missus Deere looked at Carynne with a faraway nce. It was unpleasant how the older woman kept looking at her with her mother in mind.


    The fief lord sometimes looked at her with the same gaze as well.


    Lady Nora Catherine Hare. Her maiden name was Enide. Truthfully, Catherine Right, I apologizeMadam Hare. It was really strange that she became Madam Hare. Frankly speaking, I never imagined that shed settle down here in the countryside.


    Carynne lifted the teacup to her lips to hide the shudder that ran down her body. This tea didnt taste familiar. In the end, the older woman took on a bitter tone.


    She had always been surrounded by men. I thought that shed get married and enter a better household. That is,parativelyin the materialistic sense, I mean.


    Carynne gave a sidelong nce at Missus Deere, whose face then became beet red.


    She was a strange woman, and she never seemed to listen to others. The first impression one might have on her is that shes weak, but she was very stubborn.


    These words that didnt interest Carynne were getting more tedious to hear. She grew impatient little by little. What shes concerned about here was not about the love story of the parents of  Carynne . But still, Missus Deere continued to talk about Catherine, who was the mother of  Carynne .


    Oh, how beautiful Catherine had been, how popr she was before, how numerous the suitors she had. The older woman told stories like these, her expression imparting such pride about the fact that she had been there beside Catherine to have witnessed it all.


    Carynne soon realized that this woman, rather than giving her the answers she wanted to hear, wasnt the prophet-like person she was expecting.


    She was merely a middle-aged woman who loved to talk someones ears off about the glory days.


    You truly, really resemble Catherine. I still have a portrait of her. Over there, on that wall, can you see?


    On that wall hung a portrait of a beautiful woman who looked very much like Carynne.


    Even if I die, Nancy would never even let me hang a portrait of my mother on the wall like that. Ah, wait. If I die, then the novel would be over. So thats not possible.


    What a sight. This middle-aged woman was bragging about the glory days that werent her own, and it was getting more and more burdensome.


    I hear that a lot.


    Carynnes polite smile twitched.


    Besides that, I want to talk more about my memories.


    Oh, yes.


    Missus Deere awkwardly stopped talking about the current topic.


    Youve been very precocious since you were a child. You were pretty, and smart and apart from that, the only child of this regions noblest family. Then one day, you became very sick, yes?


    <i>Deere. Do not interfere any longer. It is none of your business.</i>


    At the memory that came to mind, the look in Missus Deeres eyes darkened.


    * * *


    Then, about the culture of the orient Carryne, Carynne?


    Deere felt like crying. The little girl she was teaching was trembling again. The intelligent, clever and bubbly personality of the child that Deere had seen before vanished once the child turned seven years old.


    Now, the child was just so filled with such terror as she shed tears all day long.


    Maids who had good physiques came running and suppressed the writhing little girl. Soon, with some assistance, the evidently ill Catherine approached Carynne.


    Todays lesson crumbled just like that. Far beyond teaching a ss, Deere could only stand still, unable to soothe the child. A sense of shame filled her.


    Madam, you cant do this.


    Catherine hugged Carynne very tightly. The girl struggled in her mothers arms.


    Its alright, Carynne. Mommas here. Its alright Shh Everythings going to be alright, okay? Would you like to have some snacks with me?


    Looking straight ahead, the girl clung to her mother and let out a long, raspy cry as she spoke.


    Momma, my, my life Whats the point of it? If my life is like this, then


    It was her tenth birthday. Carynne and her rtive, Dun, became engaged.


    It was an engagement that no one weed. Catherine had be increasingly ill, so she couldnt conceive another child any longer.


    In front of rtives and acquaintances, this was what she saidthat she felt increasingly weak day by day and she didnt think that shed live long, so she wished to see her daughter get engaged.


    Everyone thought that it was a little odd for her to say this. Even so, no one objected to the parents who arranged the engagement. With the adults approval, the engagement was then carried out in an informal manner.


    When they saw each other, Carynne looked as though she had just chewed on a bug, and simrly, Dun had a rotten look on his face.


    Dun was eighteen.


    Carynne was ten.


    Y-Youre dead, really


    Sure, lets see.


    Carynne tried to resist this fate. She pushed Dun into an empty room and closed the door on him. Then, she dragged a chair in front of the knob and sat down on it to prevent Dun froming out.


    It was strange to think that, had Carynne not been removed from the spot, had the lock not been broken open, and had a servant not opened the door, Dun would have died right there.


    Carynne, apologize to Dun properly!


    The incident was grave enough that it couldnt be dismissed as a simple childs prank. However, Duns parents were extremely poor and did not want to miss out on the chance at the position of fief lord, where not only Duns school tuition would be paid, but everything else would even be provided.


    From then on, Duns parents paid more attention to Carynne, who seemed to have lost her mind, rather than to Dun, who was their own flesh and blood.


    In a family like this, the only one who could y the right role as an adult here was none other than Deere.


    She puffed out her chest and strictly put pressure on Carynne. But before she could be dragged away from Duns bed by Deere like that, these were the first words out of Carynnes lips.


    Hey, couldnt you just die at that time? Your lifes worth nothing, either.


    Carynne!


    In her astonishment, Deere covered Carynnes mouthbut it was already toote.


    Dun red back at Carynnes scowl, and he responded.


    I-If I cant kill you myself, Ill at least set your intestines on fire.


    It wasnt clear whether it was from the shock of this incident or not, but ever since then, Dun would stutter every time he saw Carynne. And the following year after that, Dun never visited the fief lords mansion.


    Deere tried even harder to change Carynne. She expanded her lessons and told stories that might interest the child. But it was only for a moment.


    Carynnes seizures increased, Catherines condition worsened, and the fief lord remained silent.


    Whatever it was that Deere did, no matter how much she tried, everyone only avoided the matter at hand.


    There was nothing else that could be done. Most of the time, rather than a teacher, it was a doctor whos beside Carynne. There were many days when Deere would just sit there in the study,pletely alone.


    The housekeeper Helen reduced Deeres sry while saying that it couldnt be helpedthere was no work for her here. At this, Deere hung her head.


    Then, it was that day.


    The day that ck gypsy woman took Deeres role and reced her.


    It happened when Carynne was fourteen years old.


    <i>t/n: im not entirely sure about the spelling of the maiden name of Carynnes mother, but i just made a wild guess and went for Enide because of the titr character in Chrtien de Troyes poem, Erec and Enide. this may or may not be an intentional reference by the author.</i>

 Chapter 40

    Chapter 40


    Youre a huge help. Thank you.


    Im only grateful to have been given a good opportunity like this. Hello there?


    If I havent talked to you, <i>dont </i>talk to me first.


    Despite the childs words, Nancy smiled and held Carynnes hand. Being the first time she met a ck woman and having her hand touched like this, Carynnes expression wrinkled for a moment, but when her mother reprimanded her, she only forced herself to look away. Nevertheless, the re in her eyes didnt look pleasant.


    Catherine was the one who introduced Nancy to Carynne, and so she spoke sternly.


    Carynne. Nancy is someone Momma brought here. You shouldnt have that kind of look.


    That dirty


    Deere! You as well, please respect Nancy as you would respect me. She is the person who will help Carynne.


    However, with Nancy being brought in like this even though Deere was still there, this implied that Deere alone was not enough, and her influence would be reduced because of that much.


    It was only natural that Deere did not like Nancy. And fortunately, Carynne didnt like Nancy either.


    The child kept going to Deere in order to avoid Nancy. Every time this happened, Deere would feel relieved.


    While they were alone together, Deere would stroke Carynnes hair. The more Carynne rejected Nancy, the more it was to Deeres benefit.


    Nancy sang a luby? Preposterous. You did well, Carynne.


    Im sure that a gypsy like that woman would only sing strange songs.


    Is it like that?


    Of course. Now then, lets get you to bed.


    A dark-skinned person, a wandering woman to boot, who hadnt even been introduced by another reputable madam. Deere was extremely displeased that such a maid was assigned to her student.


    The position of an exclusive maid was not a job for just any woman. Just as thedy of the house must never humiliate herself by showing an unkempt appearance, it was up to an exclusive maid to make sure that thedy she would serve was always pristine. She must also have a virtuous attitude and a heavy mouth that would keep quiet.


    Carynne should have had at least a middle-ss, educateddy as an exclusive maid, not a ck fortune teller.


    Deere was incensed.


    But the fief lord did not listen to any of her advice.


    Deere, Im not disparaging your teaching methods, but what Carynne needs right now is not education. Why dont you just leave it up to Nancy?


    Mister Hare, you mustnt do that. How could you let a woman like that into the household? She keeps saying strange things to Carynne.


    Rubbing his temples with one hand, the fief lord replied.


    Deere. Carynne is not your daughter. Judging whats good for the child is up to us. For the time being, why dont you take a break somewhere else?


    Then, Deere asked angrily.


    Your Lordship, I am the only one whos truly been devoted to Carynne these days. How long has it been since youve talked to Carynne instead of just talking <i>about</i> her?


    Enough. Youre overstepping your bounds. Right now, besides the child I have many important things to do. Leave and let me do them.


    When the Madam passes away, Carynne


    <i>Bang!</i>


    Deere pitied the fief lord. He couldnte to the right decision because of his sick wife. The same was true with the sick Catherine. Deere was truly the only one who could only think of Carynne separately from Catherine.


    She was a child who grew up at the hands of servants, not given any concern by her parents. And, just as the parents did not show any affection, so too did the employees not give her any warmth.


    Deere had seen this much too often. And her mistrust was well founded.


    What are you doing right now?


    What do you mean. Its Mdys medicine that will help her.


    What did you feed to Carynne? Did the doctor allow this?


    At Deeres interrogation, Nancy snorted.


    If I did, what would they know? Dont equate me with such fools, Teacher. They have their own methods, we have our own. This is better for Mdy.


    The fief lord and the madam were daft in some strange way. Its normal for adolescent children to daydream and create their own worlds inside their heads.


    Although it wasparatively worse, Carynnes seizures and delusions were not <i>un</imon for children of her age. The adults around such a child should just discipline the child appropriately.


    In such a situation, Deere became hugely infuriated about the fact that a gypsy was instead brought in and went ahead to spin strange stories to the child and give her some suspicious medicine.


    Even so, ever since Nancy came, Carynnes seizures had evidently decreased. The people of the manor, who had their hands full with Catherine alone, weed Carynnes ensuing silence.


    But in that silence, Carynne grew strange little by little.


    I cant drink that.


    Mdy?


    Nancy, it tastes strange.


    Deere was greatly shocked.


    Dont be so polite to the people who serve you, Carynne.


    Yes? Ah.


    It started with the way she spoke. Carynne became stranger and stranger. She had once been ashamed to have a ck woman as an exclusive maid, but now, she showed signs of being awkward about being that maids master. Nancys position was further raised little by little as well.


    Carynne became distinctly calm. But in Deeres eyes, this was nothing short of putting someone to sleep through drugs.


    Carynnes emotions gradually became dull, and her memories also progressively faded. The worst thing about this was how she regarded people.


    During the days that Catherine was in a better condition, she would call Carynne, however these meetings would slowly decrease from once a week, to once every other week, then once a month.


    On the other hand, Nancy spent more time caring for the child, from sun up to sun down, and her influence grew even stronger.


    Carynne How are you these days? asked Catherine.


    Not good. Nancy keeps reading me strange fairytales that I dont understand and keeps making me drink weird medicine.


    But you dont harm yourself anymore or have any seizures, do you?


    Not anymore.


    Then thats enough.


    Catherine looked towards Deere with a clouded gaze. Her eyes had already lost their ability to see, and they were open almost only for the sake of courtesy.


    As long as there is life


    In their final meeting, Carynne did not recognize her mother.


    As if looking at something dirty, she was entirely appalled by her mother. She took a step back and held onto Nancys hand.


    Madam, these days, Carynne has been following Nancy around almost as if she was you, her mother.


    Truly?


    She must be kicked out at once.


    Deere.


    Catherine was as thin as a skeleton, and the beauty she had in her youth was already lost. The white nightgown she was wearing looked as if it was hanging on mere twigs, and the womans voice was no different from the creaking of a wooden piece of furniture.


    Deere. Its been quite a while since weve been together.


    Madam Hare.


    When I die, Carynne will be fine. Nancy will take good care of her for me.


    Shes just a maid.


    Deere was choked up.


    Theres no way a maid can rece you.


    Say my name, please.


    Madam Hare.


    Not that.


    Enide.


    Catherines expression changed. But it''s uncertain whether this was a smile or not.


    * * *


    Catherine died.


    Up until she passed away, she had only her daughters portrait in her hands, stroking it dearly. Catherine wanted to see her daughter so very much, but she did not ask to meet her. She thought that it would be best if Carynne would forget about her.


    The fief lord also agreed that it would be better for the child to forget about someone who would die not longter anyway. Even still, he did not leave Catherines room for a month after she had died. And he avoided meeting Carynne.


    Carynne?


    Ah, yes. Hello.


    Catherine passed away.


    Pardon?


    Carynne looked nkly at Deere for one moment, then she shifted her gaze towards Nancy.


    And what the child would say next was something that Deere would never be able to forget.


    Carynne turned to Nancy and asked.


    Who is Catherine?


    Those words felt as though they were from a nightmare.


    What made Carynne calm was the same as turning her into a dunce.


    Deere was gobsmacked. But, after this, when she knocked on the fief lords door, he did note out.


    His daughters insanity was nothing new. Even this was trivialpared to his wifes death.


    Thest time Deere saw the fief lord was when she was kicked out of the household. It wasnt that she was driven out, but if she so wished to receive even a small pension, it would be no different than that.


    <i> Carynne speaks with a polite speech level towards Nancy (-), which normally should have been dropped to the informal level since Carynne is of a higher social standing</i>


    <i>t/n: the author intended to highlight this, but i still would like to apologize for the tant racism shown when tranting sensitive themes like this, im always at a loss when ites to bncing uracy and mild censorship. particrly in thest two chapters, i decided to stick with urate trantions when Deere/the narrative called Nancy dark skinned ( ), or when she was referred to as a ck gypsy/woman/(exclusive) maid/fortune teller ( ///).</i>


    <i>ill continue sticking with urate trantions vis--vis topics of this subject matter and other simrly sensitive matters for the sake of keeping the authors intention intact, but im always open to suggestions and constructive criticism. thank you!</i>

 Chapter 41

    Chapter 41


    So you really dont remember.


    Yes, Missus Deere.


    The first thing she felt was difort. From the way Missus Deere looked at her and to the kind of expression the older woman had, Carynne didnt like it all. And neither did she like anything the woman said.


    Are you alright?


    Yes.


    Even when it felt awful, this was fine. What Deere told her was already something that Carynne had expectedto the extent that Carynne already thought that her entire life was her own delusion. She had already been thinking about this over and over again.


    Why?


    With a perplexed expression, Missus Deere directed a question at Carynne.


    But are you alright? It must not be all okay.


    At that haughty response, Carynne felt a bitter taste in her mouth.


    To sum up everything that you said, the state of confusion that I experience is because of some kind of mysticism.


    It may be unpleasant to hear, but it is true. Gypsies know many kinds of sorcery.


    Carynne snorted.


    Why would they move from ce to ce if theyre so capable? Theyd just conquer the world.


    Missus Deeres face reddened slightly. But, she soon opened her lips to speak once more.


    Your mind is fragile, isnt it.


    To some extent, it was not so pleasant to hear this from another person. But Carynne brushed off this feeling and merely shrugged.


    A hundred years was not so easy to live through. Its already stamped in her mind that everything here could be an illusion caused by her own madness. Therefore, its not surprising to hear this truth from Missus Deere.


    The nonchnt eptance of, Yes, thats a possibility, was something she heard first. Before she would fulfill her promise to Nancy that shed die by the nannys hand, Carynne made up her mind to dole out the proper punishment first.


    Thanks to you, Ive confirmed one thingthat my father knows that Im not in my right mind.


    And that, in the manor, he was the one who gave a helping hand and hid the corpse. Carynne stared at the womans dry hair.


    You are not me.


    Because all the memories in her own head were too long and too specific, she couldnt dismiss them all as mere delusions. Carynne couldnt figure out to what extent she could believe Deeres words. No, even if she were to believe everything, wasnt the information she was given far too limited? After all, this woman was an outsider. She did not know everything.


    My father, and my mother, too, are not me. Especially Nancy


    shouldnt have been killed.


    Now that shes far away, what you said couldnt be proved true.


    These words made Deere look remarkably happy.


    Shes gone? What happened?


    She quit.


    Thats great news. So thats why you came all the way here. If she was still by your side, you couldnt havee all the way here.


    Thats right. I killed her after all. I gave her some drugs and strangled her to death. And I tried to use her corpse to surprise Ise. But I cant even find that corpse now.


    Then I can go back to being your governess now, right? You followed my lessons well. You dont remember, but trust me, you did.


    It was disgusting to see how the woman was acting like shes close to Carynne by using memories that she didnt even have. If a rich man was about to die, all sorts of women would cling to him. A woman like Helen, the housekeeper.


    But Carynne hadnt any ns to drive out Missus Deere while saying that the woman should know her ce. She had already been thrown out once. Besides that, Carynne had also met her fair share of women who wanted to wedge themselves into her life to try and be her mother.


    There are still many things you havent told me.


    Ive told not a single lie.


    Then tell me, why did you get fired?


    As Carynne asked Deere, the older womansplexion changed.


    Thats because I was opposed to how Nancy kept feeding you those useless ideas.


    Missus Deere, you mentioned that you were against Nancy from the very beginning. And even though its been a while since you were my governess, its also true that you stayed in the manor for quite a long time. You were suddenly asked to leave and


    Carynne looked around the old, dpidated house, then shook her head in exaggeration.


    I am only wondering if theres any other reason why you had to move out. Why must you skirt around the issue when ites to that topic?


    Carynne did not trust anyone. If she couldnt even trust herself, who could she possibly trust? The same was true for this woman in front of her. This was a fact that she had alreadye to terms with for as long as she had been suffering from this madness.


    But this woman, she wanted Carynne to deny the 100 years that she had lived through? Carynne couldnt ept it. After just one measly story about an abstract past, she was being asked to admit that thats the end of it?


    Did you wish to be my mother?


    Everyone in that house is out of their minds. For you, I!


    Oh, you protested so gantly on behalf of this crazy little girl youve taken under your wing, but because of that, you got thrown out. I dont believe any of it.


    At first, Carynnes tone of voice was light-hearted, as if she was very amused by it all, but then it dropped down suddenly towards the end.


    Deere was about to approach Carynne, but at the sound of the younger womans voice, she flinched.


    And, little by little, fear set in.


    Carynne?


    I said I dont believe you. Just for the sake of verifying my cognitive capacity, I chopped up a body, brought in that corpses son and confirmed it through himbut youe out suddenly and say, Youre crazy, you mustnt believe anything? As the protagonist of my own life, I refuse such a plot twist.


    Carynne, what Right now, what on earth are you saying.


    Ive done <i>one</i> thing thus far! Now, Im asking you what this is! I gave her drugs, cut her to pieces and set her on fire, I tell you! Do you think Ill be satisfied just hearing <i>something </i>like this? From someone as insignificant as you when you just suddenly appeared?


    I I dont know what youre talking about.


    Do not pretend that you dont know.


    Carynne clenched her teeth. She found it difficult to ept that it was all because she was confused. This needed to be sorted out. It had to be handled. Steer herself. Take action. The coin had already been tossed. There was no reason to hesitate.


    And if you at least had a brain, you would know.


    <i>tter.</i>


    You should understand that I have no intention of keeping you alive now. Right?


    Carryne! Calm down! Nancy has been tormenting you, the fact that youvee all the way here only now, cant you see? The time since you were a baby and to this day now that youvee here, cant you tell just by looking back at the things that you cant remember? But now that youvee to me, itll be alright. Yes? Now that His Lordship kicked that woman out, I can see that he also knows. That I was wronged. If you take me back with you now, itll be alright. Everything


    Deere let out everything she wanted to say in a hurry. Something had gone wrong.


    <i>Bang!</i>


    AHH!


    Carynne aimed at the womans head, but she missed the mark. Blood dripped from Deeres head nheless. Her face was covered in blood. Carynne reloaded and approached the woman. The bullet just grazed her scalp and hit the surface.


    Raymond finished it in only one shot, but I guess a human beings skull is more slippery than I thought.


    Carynne, get ahold of yourself now, please?


    Carynne took a step closer to Deere. What a sight. This middle-aged woman had been trying to get Carynne under her control just now, proudlyying down her past. But now, she was over there in one corner, shivering.


    Ive already killed Nancy.


    Carynneughed. Her bright teeth shone in the afternoon sun. Deere stepped back, but there was nowhere else to go.


    The girl with a smiling face drew closer and closer.


    * * *


    Its alright.


    Its fine.


    All the sad things are just part of the novel.


    The youngdy is dreaming right now.


    To you, this world is but a dream.


    Soon, you and the knight shall fall in love.


    And all the suffering shalle to an end.


    * * *


    Didnt I say Ill pick you up in a little while, Mdy?


    Borwen.


    Please just stay docile. The one wholl be scolded by Lord Dun is a lowly person like me.

 Chapter 42: Denial, Denial, Denial

    Chapter 42: Denial, Denial, Denial


    <b>06. Denial, Denial, Denial</b>


    Youre not going to shoot me, too, are you? Thanks to you, Im the only one who has to be saddled with so much work.


    From behind, Borwen grabbed Carynnes arm and took the pistol from her grasp. Then, he put on a pair of gloves and looked at Deeres body, which was sprawled out.


    Far from even feeling panicked, he touched the corpse without a hint of surprise. How many people knew about Carynnes madness? How many people knew what she had done?


    Ill take care of things over here. Larry brought the carriage out front, so please go out and wait there.


    Just what are you doing.


    Borwen pushed up his sses and sighed.


    Let me work through this first, and then well talkter.


    Do you need help?


    No. No need.


    Borwen said so, already tired of hearing Carynnes words. Ah, thats not the answer. Borwen had such incredulity in his expression. Carynne regretted saying that. Still, she wasnt exactly sure how to behave naturally.


    Her practiced, simted kindness was not appropriate for this situation. Fortunately, Borwen didnt seem to care about the hesitant Carynne.


    He pushed Carynne out the door, and so she trudged back to the carriage. Larry was the coachman for the carriage that the fief lord used for official business. Even though Carynnes skirt was sttered with blood, the middle-aged man simply opened the door of the carriage for her. Donna was nowhere to be found.


    From when.


    She was tired. Carynne closed her eyes. She was all worn out from fatigue. Her clothes were stained with blood. As she sat down, she could see the sunset. Her surroundings looked so warm and livelypared to the bloody room she had just gotten out of. She could hear the noisy crowd of the festival around.


    Hey, Tom.


    The boy handed over a thin nket to cover her clothes.


    I think Ive gone crazy.


    Panicked, Tom almost dropped the nket. As he was looking at her, Carynne nced down helplessly. She did all that just to confirm if she really was crazy Was it all for naught?


    She had stopped smiling and shot a bullet right through that womans face, but the truth was, its difficult to refute everything that Deere had said. Wasnt that what madness was all about? Something that was difficult to prove all by herself.


    If her entire life was, indeed, a product of her own psychosis and if her actions were merely driven by madness,


    Empty. Futile. Then, the experiment was in vain. Then, all that effort was useless. Everything that she had done and all her efforts were just boiled down to the word madness, and allegedly, it could all be conveniently solved through some form of brainwashing. All logic and rationality in this world had gone up to smoke yesterday evening.


    She covered her face with one hand. She felt sick to her stomach.


    Then now, after having shackles on both wrists, after having confessed my sins to Dun and after having tied a piece of rope around my neck, will I be able to see Nancy?


    That didnt sound so bad.


    Carynne feltughter bubbling at her throat. If that were to happen, then all this torture inside her head would finally be over, and rest would finally visit her. Thats fine. Thats not such a bad ending. No, if she really could die, then wouldnt that be a happy ending?


    At least, it was the appropriate ending for one such lunatic.


    However, she dyed her eptance. This was still just a possibility. As she had told Deere, she had far too many memoriesa hundred years worth of memories piled up so high. She knew everything there was to know about what would happen in theing year, about other peoples sleeping habits even. From this point on, she would need to think of any way to prove that she was not crazy.


    Well, she didnt care if she was crazy. She was either going to be executed or she was going to be shipped off to a loony bin. That much determination had endedst night.


    Theres no need to panic.


    Ill just die.


    His Lordship went through all that trouble, so why dont you show some more tenacity, will you?


    Hello there, Mister Viinous Assistant.


    As Carynne giggled, Borwen sighed and loaded tworge bags into the carriage. Missus Deeres body was quite bulky. Borwen excused himself.


    The maids still upstairs.


    Do you have to kill her?


    Is that something <i>you</i> can say, Mdy? Please move your legs. This isnt a freight carriage, so its a bit cramped.


    And Donna?


    Just in case, I deliberately urged her to go to a theater.


    Okay.


    Do you feel sorry?


    Huh?


    Do you feel sorry that you couldnt kill Donna?


    Who knows.


    As she stretched her legs over the bags containing the corpse, she felt both tired and relieved. Her shoes made her feet feel ufortable. That in itself was grounding her to reality. As Carynne popped the joints on her knuckles, she looked down over to Borwen.


    You have nothing else to say to me besides that? Right now, Im ready to divulge the secrets of birth, the twists of life, so on and so forth. I leave all the questions to you, the who, when, where, what, how and why.


    Borwen only had a curious look on his face.


    Even if you say it like that so suddenly, well. Im in this position because of money, but Mdy, youre quite off your rocker, arent you?


    Were you the one who chopped up Nancy?


    So suddenly.


    Its you, right?


    Frowning, Borwen replied reluctantly.


    Yes.


    Whyd you chop her up?


    Theres too many people around. I urgently needed to bring it somewhere else to take care of it.


    What have you taken care of?


    At the sudden interruption, Carynne almost let out a curse. Out of pure shock.


    Raymond was peering into the carriage from outside the window. Borwen gasped as he saw the knight standing right there.


    Sir Raymond, what brings you here?


    I saw a familiar carriage, so I was going to ask if you could join me.


    As you can see, Ive indulged in enough luxury.


    Raymond smiled like a fox as he looked down at therge bags inside the carriage. Carynne looked over to Borwen with a smile as well. Fortunately, he hardened his expression and backed down, resuming his role as an ordinary attendant.


    You have, havent you?


    Right?


    So what was it that you had to take care of?


    Oh my Lord Raymond, you cant just ask like that.


    Carynne nced at him with the same smile still on her lips. She couldnt expect Borwen to be able to handle answering that. Its up to her now. Borwen was naturally pushed out from the conversation.


    A matter kept between a man and a woman could be considered disgraceful, but its just something that concerns the household. Theres no need for you to pry, Sir.


    I wont tell anyone, so cant you share this dreadful secret with me?


    The smile on Carynnes lips seemed to twitch. It would be nice if you could kindly piss off. Even better if you get lost permanently. Oh, how great would be if theres a way to shut you up just like how Missus Deere had been silenced with a shot.


    Alright, this is a secret, okay? Nancy and Borwen have been seeing each other. Did you notice?


    I had no idea.


    And this time, Nancy actually disappeared so that she could give birth safely, thats why she went away. She suddenly broke up with him and ran away like that.


    How dreadful to hear.


    Right?


    Borwens face got all wrinkled up. Still, Carynne continued speaking without a pause. If he spoke up now, then theyd both be in a bind. Theres no gun here right now. Even if there was, theres no assurance that the bullet would hit its mark.


    If youre here, what about Miss Evans?


    Miss Evans seemed to be in pain because of her feet, so she intended to go back to the carriage. I happened to see a familiar coat of arms on this carriage, so.


    She recalled Ise bustling about while wearing those high heels that were too high. Seeing Raymond be so shameless and smile like that, Carynne felt cold sweat trickling down. At this moment, she wasnt just a suspicious woman talking gibberish anymore, but a murderer sitting right in front of a knight.


    Is that so.


    The festival is still in full swing. Are you going back already?


    Right now, Im about to go and uncover a dreadful truth.


    Murder, rape, robbery,rceny, fraud or a dine and dash?


    Carynne gave a serious answer in return.


    Its not to that degree, but nheless still very dreadful.


    Truly?


    Its the secret of birth.

 Chapter 43

    Chapter 43


    There was once a time when I wondered if there was a secret to my own birth.


    Its not something like being the Emperors illegitimate child, is it?


    You catch on quick.


    The uninteresting joke quickly softened the mood and was a good way to let go of the previous topic of the conversation.


    Raymond wasnt the only one whos talented in that aspect. Carynne smiled and brought up the engagement.


    After hearing that the Countess ising, I feel a bit nervous.


    I know what you mean.


    Carynne contemted, tapping her foot against the suitcase there. Its not just her birth. Raymond was handsome, cheeky and bothersome with the way he constantly butted into Carynnes businessstill as ever, still as ever.


    Carynne brooded over those words. From what she could recall, the engagement had never progressed this fast. This development had been slower before. And the presence of the countess in this engagement ceremony was no different than a stamp on that marriage already.


    I was aiming for you, Sir Raymond, but what a shame.


    Haha, its a pity.


    Its a young girls dream, so dont take what I said seriously, alright?


    Dreams were meant to be broken. Just as water in a ss was meant to be downed.


    Raymond was not a huge presence in Carynnes life right now. But Carynne felt a creeping displeasure.


    Here she was, floundering in a sea of chaos in her own head as she had just shot someone to death, yet Raymond and Ise were having it easy with the oh so sweet worries of whether this marriage was something they really wanted or whether this would turn out to be nothing but a marriage of convenience.


    Then would Raymond marry Ise? Somehow, Carynnes insides felt all twisted up. Clearly, it wasnt because she was jealous of how another woman had bagged a good man for herself.


    If it was true that all this in the end was just a product of her madness, then she would need to n for a bleak future aheadwhether shed die or whether shed go straight to jail.


    And yet, they would just live happily ever after.


    This was what she couldnt bear to envy. Carynne chewed the inside of her cheek. Seeing as how she loathed to genuinely bless the couple, she must be the viin then. With a bit of a screw loose.


    * * *


    Unexpectedly, Borwen led Carynne to the studyshe thought shed be incarcerated immediately. The gun was confiscated though, but that didnt seem like enough of a punishment.


    The only order given to me is to protect you unconditionally.


    So, how much are you being paid?


    Youll be shocked when you hear it. The money being spent to protect you and support your endeavors is no joke.


    And she was wondering where the budget leak was going towards, yet it was for this after all. Carynne was bewildered, but she soon pulled out the drawers in the study and looked through them.


    But why are you doing such crazy things? Carynne asked.


    Thats what Id like to ask myself. Though its because of the money.


    Tell me what happened with Nancy. How was it possible that you brutally dealt with the body? And why didnt you lock the door?


    Carynne revisited her questions from when they were in the carriage earlier. After being asked, Borwen looked at Carynne with a sour look on his face, scratching the back of his head for a moment. Then, he answered.


    Well, personally, I disliked that woman a little.


    Borwen looked around the study for a moment, then headed for the door again.


    This here is properly locked, yes? I was in a hurry to clean up back then, but that room didnt have any locks.


    So thats what it was. Carynne recalled the story that Missus Deere told her about, when Carynne had locked Dun up in a room and the others had needed to let out the hounds for that. Thats why ever since then, that room had never been locked. As always, once you knew the truth, it was all very trifling.


    That room is the room from back then, huh. Make sure to fix that properly from now on. Now, leave.


    Borwen nervously peeked, but Carynne no longer cared about him. A servant was a servant. Theres no point to a person who did not know their ce well. Carynne walked into the room. There was a person in there who knew more, and it was  Carynne s father.


    There werent many things inside the room that seemed very useful. Paper, paper, and more paper. Most of the documents were trial records or budget allocations.


    Carynne turned to look at the old bookshelves. This study was the fief lords private study, so Carynne didnt have much ess to it. In the past when she had snuck inif Carynnes past was indeed not just a mere delusionshe hadnt been able to read much.


    And, in between the books was an ostensibly huge portrait of Catherine being shown off.


    The atmosphere this gave off was simr to that of Missus Deeres house. Obsession for a dead person. Catherine was already dead, and yet she continued to affect many people. And during all those years, they would see that womans face like a specter behind Carynnes.


    Isnt she beautiful?


    Yes.


    It was a bit creepy.


    Carynne turned to the side. Her father, the fief lord, slowly entered the room.


    Quite so. Yes, shes beautiful.


    Catherines portrait here was muchrger than the portrait in Deeres house. Hanging high in this study was a portraitrger than a real person, easily overwhelming anyone whod walk into this room. But unlike Deere, the man who owned this portrait was the husband, so it was not so strange to see.


    She really was beautiful. My wife.


    Carryne studied the fief lords wrinkled face. With his features, he looked to be quite dashing in his youth. But now, he was nothing but a daft middle-aged man. And yet, behind that face was a man who used his power to aid and support his daughters murders. He was a man difficult for Carynne to judge.


    Shes also none other than your mother.


    Even though hes her father, Carynne knew very little about the fief lord in front of her. He was not an important character. Carynne chewed on her lower lip. An  important character , huh. Perhaps this description would fit him now. And apart from that, whats important right now was something else.


    Youve already heard about it, but right now, Im terribly confused, Father.


    Her voice trembled a little. She cleared her throat. Truthfully, she wanted to grab her fathers throat right now and yell at him to spit out the truth. But she held it in. She had waited a long time before this. If she could do that much before, then she couldpose herself and do it again.


    Right Missus Deere is dead, he said.


    Yes.


    Carynnes heart was about to burst out of her chest. The fief lord didnt seem to be shocked by this. What was he thinking, she wondered. How far would he condone her. Who <i>was</i> she.


    Right, yes of course. Ill have to contribute to her funeral expenses.


    The fief lord rubbed the wrinkles around his eyes. Carynne saw sweat glistening from his hands. The temperature around them was much too cool for him to start sweating like that, so she could guess how he was feeling right now.


    I know youve already heard from Borwen.


    Stop changing the subject. Im the one who killed her.


    For a moment, the bewildered fief lord opened and closed his mouth.


    Why did you kill her?


    I was in a bad mood.


    Though insincere, she answered truthfully. Even if she tried to give a long drawn out reason, in the end, the root of the matter was simpleshe killed someone because that person made her mood sour, and that woman wasnt even a good opponent to kill.


    If Borwen hadnt appeared and helped at that moment, then it would have been really difficult to deal with the aftermath.


    Thats why I killed her.


    And in this very instant, Deere was nothing but a stepping stonea key character.


    Carynne wondered what the fief lord would say after this. Hearing his daughters answer, the fief lord quietly answered.


    She was a tremendously meddlesome person, yes. She must have irritated you a lot.


    What a poor excuse for her actions.


    Carynne did not respond. Was he still somehow trying to protect her? Even now, right in front of her very eyes. She did not expect this kind of answer.


    Itll be alright.


    The fief lord ced his hand over his daughters shoulder and gripped heavily. Rather than encouraging Carynne, it seemed as if he was trying tofort himself.

 Chapter 44

    Chapter 44


    Lets talk over a cup of tea. Since we ate dinner and enjoyed the festival separately, lets have a conversation like this, the two of us.


    Yes. We need to talk. A lot.


    Carynne sat down on a chair. Beyond the sunset-tinged window, the faint echoes of an artillery salute could be heard. It was the official beginning of the full-fledged festival.


    After the period of abstinence, any repudiation against Raymond and Ises engagement was covered up with avish disy of material things. The true masters of thisnd were here having a strange conversation, but for those two, the story that would flow in this room would be irrelevant to them. With just one ss barrier, those other stories had bepletely separate.


    Carynne looked around in this room of reality. What a ridiculously harmless interrogation room. The fief lord didnt seem to think much about the murders that Carynne hadmitted.


    Was he doing this just so he could reassure Carynne as well? Since she was supposedly suffering from a mental illness, did he do all thatcover it all up, hide the evidence, create a fiancjust to soothe her?


    I do think that this years tea harvest will be good. The weather is fine.


    It wont be so good though.


    She answered casually, but soon closed her mouth. She was trying not to be so sure about anything anymore. These kinds of remarks and notions were poisonous.


    Ah, no. Im not so sure about that. Dont believe me, Father.


    If you say so, then it must be like that.


    What did that mean?


    She needed to drink warm tea to moisten her dry throat. Carynne sat there in her chair and, with trembling hands, took the cup that Borwen prepared. She wouldnt be able to go on without drinking tea.


    Are you feeling alright?


    Yes.


    After she downed the red-colored tea, she then felt as though she was calming down a little. Carynne looked at the fief lords face, but it was difficult to read anything from his countenance. Once the meaningless greetings came and went, it was difficult to bear what happened after.


    The tip of her tongue started to feel dry again. So, she sipped her tea once more.


    I heard a few things from Missus Deere.


    Were those the rude remarks?


    Rude enough that she was killed, yes. Carynne nodded.


    Thats right. That woman refuted my whole life. She said Ive gone crazy and lost my memories.


    What a truly rude woman who doesnt know her ce.


    The fief lord shook his head as if he truly despised her. It seemed like he truly hated the woman. But was it for the same reason as Carynne?


    Indeed.


    Carynne didnt bother to give another reason to cover up her actions. Deere wanted to be Carynnes mother. That meant that she was aiming to be the fief lords mistress. She expressed a sense of responsibility for Catherine and Carynne, but the fief lord and Carynne herself only felt annoyed at her. It felt kind of pitiful, and Carynne found that this feeling was somewhat how she also felt towards Ise Evans.


    The fief lord was revulsed by that woman. Even when that woman had lost her life to his daughter, it didnt seem like he was feeling any remorse for her.


    To be honest, I wasnt that angry, Carynne exined. Um Well, it was like that at the moment it happened, but not that I think back on it, I dont think I hated what happened that much. To be honest, I felt kind offortable.


    Why is that so?


    Because itll be over the moment someone dies.


    A sigh and a peal ofughter permeated the air at the same time.


    I would be ever so happy if this torturous life would just end.


    Its not for the reason that you think.


    Regardless of who she was or how she was calling this man her father, it didnt matter to Carynne. Nothing at all mattered. If Carynne was crazy. If everything was truly a mere delusion.


    Thats why Carynne just wanted the fief lord to give her a definite answer.


    I just want it to end.


    The fief lord stared straight into Carynnes eyes.


    You wont loathe or detest it?


    Yes.


    This was the truth. She had witnessed humanitys goodness and wickedness far too much. She just wanted one exnation.


    Death and life itself seems to be much too light for you, the fief lord remarked.


    Lighter than paper, yes. Its got to be that light when time wouldnt go forward. Truthfully though, I do still want to feel sorry, somewhat.


    The fief lord fell silent once more. As the silence became overwhelming, Carynne spoke.


    Lets have a serious conversation, Father.


    To the point that wed vomit our guts out.


    * * *


    Deeres got a big mouth, so why did you let her leave the mansion? Ah, you dont have to answer me. Shes already dead after all. A story about me is much more interesting than that womans life or her past. So, let me askam I Carynne?


    Why dont you ask just one question at a time?


    Fine.


    Carynne took a deep breath. There were too many things she was suspicious about. It felt like her head was about to explode from the plethora of questions rushing at her. But, she had only one mouth. She finally reached this point. She could do this one at a time.


    Is it true that Ive had issues since I was young?


    Thats right.


    Is it true that Nancy erased my memories and gave me new ones?


    Youve found out already.


    Carynne once again brought up the question she was the most curious about.


    Am I Carynne?


    You are my one and only daughter.


    Thats not what she meant. Carynne frowned. Was Carynne  Carynne thats her question. Did she have a ce to return to? Or was it all just mere illusion?


    Thats No. What I mean is, is it appropriate for me to call you Father?


    Mm, if you look at the portrait over here, you can see that you look exactly like your mother.


    She shouldnt ask in this way. Carynne looked up at the portrait.


    Would this conversation be easier if you were alive? Why is an outsider like him in front of me and not you?


    When I think of how jealous other people were of me up until we got married, its to the point that I get sick and tired of it. Im telling you, there were indeed many suitors.


    Your love story doesnt matter right now though.


    Carynne looked at him with a hint of incredulity in her gaze. Sure enough, his wife had died, and after that there were rumors of him going half out of his mind, so to what extent was he correct in feeling this way.


    Catherine, like Carynne, was an incredibly beautiful woman, just as Deere said. Even when she had moved to a backwoods countryside like this, its said that invitations flew in from so many ces every winter.


    But who said that? Carynne tried to suppress the memories of the past that kept rushing into the forefront of her mind. Dunno. She didnt know anything and she wasnt sure about nothing.


    Ah, if only she had a gun now.


    She would have aimed it at the fief lords head right now. No, but she couldnt end it right away. She needed to hear the truth, so lets start with threats.


    Father.


    So no matter how intense it was


    I killed Nancy, too. You know this as well.


    Why did you hide her body?


    If Miss Evans finds out, wouldnt it be difficult for me to protect you?


    The fief lord replied, and at this, Carynne was both relieved and frustrated at the answer.


    I really do feel like a marite on a stage. In this world, I became a spectacle alone. What the hell did you think when you knew I did it?


    It was to protect you.


    Then you should have at least told me You know, its funny that Im the one saying this.


    She tapped one finger on the table.


    Nancys dead, correct? Did Missus Deere die by my hands? My Father in front of me, how can you say for sure that youre here?


    She was so excruciatingly tired from this twisted sense of reality. And Carynne felt bitter about the fact that her gun was taken away from her. If the cause of her pain was her father, this man in front of her, then she would have wanted to drive several bullets into him.


    It didnt matter that she would have no other blood rtive in this world. Wasnt he an enemy who must be killed for the sake of her curiosity and entertainment? Wasnt he the terrible source that made her entire life a lie? For it to be covered up with denialCarynne was not convinced.


    You killed Nancy.


    The fief lord acknowledged this to Carynne.


    And I am now in front of you.


    He took Carynnes hand. She felt his warmth. A sense of relief started spreading within her. It was the same feeling she had when Tom confirmed that the body of his father had not disappeared. As expected, it was like that. Someone was killed, someone died. Time flowed from yesterday to today. If the only one whos crazy was her, then the world was stable. However, there was no such thing as a stable truth.

 Chapter 45

    Chapter 45


    Why did you clean up the body?


    Why did you steal the truth from me? Do you even know what this means to me?


    Tears welled up in her anger. This act was no different from taking away the truth from her like this, letting her madness and irrationality eat away at her. This was neither love nor protection.


    Wouldnt it have been difficult for you if things grew out of hand? The childs happiness is the parents happiness as well. All Catherine and I wish for you is happiness.


    If you wish for my, <i>my</i> happiness.


    Her voice was hoarse. Carynne hated the middle-aged man in front of her. This stance of his of not telling her the honest truth, this conduct of cleaning up her mess without telling her anything. It was all disgustingly terrible.


    Why didnt you grab me by the shoulders and tell me this<i>Youre crazy.</i>


    What should I do to satisfy you?


    If I killed someone, you should have told me that Im not supposed to do that, right? You should have thrown me in jail. You should have let me be tried in court and gave me the death penalty.


    What kind of happiness could you attain in prison? You havent even started your life yet. Youve yet to meet a man, get married and have your own children.


    She was so utterly speechless that she wanted to stomp her feet.


    If my insanity is hereditary, then it must have been from <i>you, </i>Father.


    At those words, the fief lord abashedly shrugged his shoulders. And then his answer was just absurd.


    You resemble your mother more than me.


    Do you even know what on earth youre saying right now? My mother and father ruined my life. At the very least I should know how to think for myself, but <i>no</i>. I cant even believe anything I see, hear or feel right now. Its not about trusting you or not, neither is it about you loving me. What youre doing is nothing short of a sledgehammer right to my head to erase my memories just to give me what you im is a stable life.


    Marriage, love. What the hell kind of dream was that.


    Between putting someone to sleep through medications and with this so-called peaceful life, whats the difference?


    Those things have no importance to me right now.


    Theyre important.


    The fief lord asserted this.


    Theyre very important, Carynne.


    Look here, Mister Fief Lord.


    If it was like this, then there was no need to continue this conversation. Carynne tightened her grip on the fief lords hand. She had just gotten her nails done. His hand gained a few red marks, but that was all.


    What is it?


    I should be angry. But I cant even do that properly either, Im too baffled. Ha Fine, do as you please. Im going to keep killing people, so if you want to stop me, then try it. And if I mess up, Ill just go to Sir Raymond and turn myself in.


    I wont let you.


    Lock me up then. Stop me. Tie my arms and legs, find another hypnotist to rece Nancy. This time, I want you to tell me an even more beautiful story than this fantasy where Ive fallen into a book and have been dying over and over again for one hundred years. It might be fun to find myself waking up in the emperors bedroom and be a sex ve, or even go further back in history where I can try to change the world.


    Carynne tried to be as sarcastic as she could. She would not be able to see any grief from her father. And he wasnt going to fight with her about this.


    If a crime had beenmitted, its only natural to exact punishment. She didnt start all this with that determination in mind.


    But then, rather than her determination, the fief lord focused his attention on three words.


    One hundred years?


    Maybe more than that, I dont know. If there are new memories, just erase them all and turn me into a dunce.


    It felt like she had died for nothing. Carynne wanted to burn her whole body. To burn her father to death right in front of her eyes. To rip him apart.


    But even more vehemently than that, she felt a seething hatred. All those efforts, those years, those memoriesdid all that mean nothing? It was all just an illusion? Was there no worth to them? The conclusion that this was all just her own insanity was too convenient.


    Shed rather kill.


    One hundred years. Is that the time youve lived?


    Its done now. Its much too long. Just finish it all.


    Carynne came up with a n to take her own life so she could escape reality.


    Should she hang herself, drink poison, or shoot herself in the head. Which one.


    Poison, as expected?


    Im sorry about not being able to give you a proper answer.


    Should we just stop doing these useless things and walk hand-in-hand together into the monastery? What do you think?


    Catherine told me not to interfere in your life as much as possible.


    I dont want to hear about a mother who I dont even remember.


    At that, the fief lord drew back from Carynne. He looked shocked by what she said.


    Everyone heres a lunatic. Its a den of psychos. Wasnt this a family that would just make you sigh?


    However, the fief lord looked at Carynne with a crestfallen look.


    Catherine loved you. Very much.


    Do I really have to be reminded of that now? My very own father erased my memories to the point that I cant even feel this love that you speak of. What are you trying to do, really? Are you going to continue being an aplice to my murders, just as youve done so far? Sounds fun. Sure, great. Thats what I want. If youre helping me anyway, kill that man Verdic straight away. Ises a bonus. And it would be ever so splendid if even Sir Raymond dies. Youll do it for sure, yes?


    Carynne.


    Why, you wont do it? Then what the hell do you want to do?


    Carynne red at the fief lord. How frustrating. She knew far too little, and the fief lord was hiding something from her. And now she was looking at her with that kind of look. Who are you to do that to me.


    Ive grown tired now, too, he said.


    Likewise.


    Dont talk about Catherine like that. She did it for your happiness. But


    Tears streamed down from the fief lords eyes.


    I Im tired now.


    And he covered his eyes with his hands.


    Catherine loved you so very much. And she was just like you.


    Then I must have inherited this insanity from Mom.


    Dont be sarcastic when talking about Catherine. She, your mother


    The fief lord found it difficult to continue speaking. His emotions surged up. He took a moment to breathe, and then he spoke once more.


    She used to talk just like you. The world is like a novel to her. And she said that shes older than how she looked.


    Carynne stopped breathing.


    And you, too She said that you will live the same life she lived.


    So what youre saying is that Catherinemy mother has the same symptoms that I have?


    Yes.


    Are you certain?


    Hearing the suspicion in Carynnes voice, an offended look swept through the fief lords expression without holding back.


    Thats what my wife said. How can you doubt her words.


    Dont tell me. My fathers not an imbecile, is he?


    Carynne spun a wily imagination inwardly. If it was like the life Carynne had experienced thus far, her mother, Catherine, wouldnt have turned up dead had there not been any conflict caused by her father. They always just had that only that much relevance.


    But what he said just now, that its not just Carynne. That was something she could never ignore.


    I dont exactly know the details of it. And in the end, its just something that youd tend to doubt. Id rather that its just But shes right. To start from the beginning and forget everything.


    Missus Catherine.


    Mother.


    In the midst of it all, the fief lord still corrected her words. She had to hold it in because she was about to spit out words that she couldnt even describe. She wondered if the fief lord had always been this kind of person.


    Yes, my mother.


    She nced sideways and looked at the portrait. How great would it have been if the person that was here before her wasnt the fief lord, but her. Carynne couldnt help but sigh.


    Why was it that the one whos left living was this fief lord who was an outsider to all this? If what hes saying was right, then wasnt it that the only person in this entire world who could understand Carynne was her dead mother?


    Do you have any proof that she lived a repeated life like me?


    So, in the end, youre still doubting it.


    Arent you the living proof of it?

 Chapter 46

    Chapter 46


    Like him, if only she could believe as innocently and navely, then it would be ever so wonderful.


    However, Carynne had a difficult time calming her pounding chest.


    I would doubt it if its someone else, her father said. But if its you, she told me that it couldnt be doubted.


    Then thats that.


    Because its a phenomenon that needs no exnation. And its impossible for me to exin as well.


    In the end, he was right. Its difficult toprehend something thats supposed to be impossible.


    Carynne herself was the evidence to prove it. As she had been living a repetitive life all this time, of course she knew it for herself, so how could she doubt it? Just to understand the anguish she was feeling, the other person would have to search for the same meaning for 100 yearsno, perhaps 10,000 years.


    Carynne dropped her head onto her clenched hand. Her head was hot.


    What you said is right, she answered.


    No matter what the answer was, it would be difficult to take in.


    Even if she were to hear her father say that he was God, or if the sky were to open up and shoot down lightning at this very moment and God would descend from the heavens, Carynne wouldnt have been surprised. However, she would still wonder if these were hallucinations induced by the drugs she tookst night.


    All these years had made her like this, for doubt to be her closest friend.


    Yes.


    If its something that could be solved by logic


    If it was like that Carynne calmed herself down as she felt the onught of hyperventtion.


    Why did you hide it? If you had just said something, then I, more Wouldnt I have lived morefortably?


    For the longest time, she had spent so many days dwelling on the notion that she was living inside a novel. If she had at least known that there was one more person who was having the same ordeals as her, then she wouldnt have been so miserable. Better yet, she would have maybe had hope.


    However, the fief lord denied her assumption.


    You heard about this matter when you were ten years old, but you were unable to ept it. You said that life was meaningless.


    Then if, from the start, you had left me in the dark about this


    Isnt this the result of it?


    Silence once again fell over the room.


    If my mother was in the same predicament, then did my grandmother have to go through this, too? Is this something thats handed down from generation to generation?


    I dont know that much about it.


    I see.


    Did the couple not talk to each other that much? Carynne was getting frustrated because she couldnt get as many answers as she wanted. It wasforting to see that the fief lord, just like her, seemed to be uneasy. If he were just sitting there, observing her casually, then there would have been nothing more upsetting than that.


    However, the conversation didnt continue well because they both realized how much difort they felt for the other. Its like they were of different wavelengths throughout this conversation when they tried to talk about the anguish that they felt when they experienced different sides of the story.


    This conversation that had been put off for 100 yearsit was strange. Awkward. Painful.


    So my mother likened her life to a novel.


    Yes.


    Was it a romance novel?


    Hm?


    What genre did she say it was? My life, I mean.


    A world full of rationality had abandoned her, and what greeted her back was a world full of fantasy. If thats the case, then she would y by those rules.


    Carynne pushed her doubts to one corner of the page, folded it and drew a question mark over it. Of course, the question was how could she get out of this.


    How do I end the story?


    The fief lord pointed a finger towards himself.


    Find someone like me.


    Pardon?


    Thats what Catherine did. She met me and went on to live her true life.


    Even though she decided to ept whatever words she heard, it wasnt easy. Trying to sort her own thoughts and feelings regarding the fief lord, Carynne picked one question to ask.


    Does it end with marriage?


    With love, of course.


    It was quite disconcerting to hear that ones life was nothing but a novel. Its unrealistic, odda story that youd hear from some loon who deliriously believed in their own fantasies. However, there was no other choice but to ept it as the truth.


    It wasnt love that had the greatest influence on a persons life. It was death.


    And yet here it was againlove. It was once again controlling Carynnes life.


    Carynne was on the verge of being fed up. This tedious, tiresome, annoying trope wasing up again.


    You should love. Youre going the wrong way right now. Fall in love!


    <i>Shut up!</i>


    Carynne swallowed the words. Blood was pooling in her eyes. What formed in the fief lords eyes were tears, but with Carynneno, it was blood. Be that as it may, the fief lord continued speaking.


    She met me and said that even if she didnt have to leave the novel, its fine. More than that, she said that she didnt need to read the novel over and over again anymore.


    Thats what she said?


    The fief lord tapped himself again with one finger.


    Yes. She said that Im her male lead. No other man was the right one for her. Not Count Landon, Not Crown Prince Gueuze, and not Marquis Pencier either. Only <i>I</i> was her true love.


    The fief lord recited the names of powerful men, one after another. Like a person meddling in the affairs of other people, Carynne traced her memories and tried to recall just who these men were that had been quite scandalously involved with Catherine.


    Since they were from a different generation, she hadn''t had the chance to meet them. Only Crown Prince Gueuze was a familiar name to herparticrly, she knew that he was notorious for being lustful.


    Compared to them, I was better


    The fief lords face was full of pride. That expression of his looked quite like the one Deere had, and she was someone the fief lord ironically loathed.


    This was an obsession for a dead person. It wasnt just about remembering the person they truly loved, but it was remembering how the deceased had looked at them, and it was a sense of pride that they protected.


    The expression that the fief lord had as he said that Catherine chose to marry him rather than those other suitors was the very expression Deere had as she was looking at Catherines portrait in her house.


    In the end, I was her love, after all.


    The way he said that he won after marrying Catherine was a lot more justified andpelling than how Deere did it. However, Carynne was much too old to be impressed by what he was saying and how he looked.


    In the novels Ive read, the male lead is usually the most handsome man whos close in age with the main character.


    Lord Hare wasnt all that bad, but its not like he was overwhelmingly head and shoulders above Catherines other suitors.


    Now that itse to this, it seemed like true love was quite far away. What if one of the dying men fighting on the battlefield now was Carynnes male lead? What a dumbfounding conclusion.


    So its love.


    Yes, its love. I dont think youve found it yet. But, like your mother It is true love.


    Seeing how the fief lord was nodding to himself, Carynne clenched her fist. Such a sharine storywasnt it just too unrealistic, so terribly frustrating to the point of disgust? Its as if she was being hit one the head with a sledgehammer, just that the weapon in question was made entirely out of candy.


    It was something that I didnt believe myself as I was just a terrible rascal, said the fief lord. Butpared to the emotions that might have been said, these are truly pure and gant feelings.


    While thats what you know, then thats how you feel.


    Carynne forced the corners of her lips to curve up into a smile. The people you thought were below you knew all about it in the end.


    Are you still wandering because you havent found your male lead?


    It shouldnt be so easy to be offended by words that were so unbelievable, so fairytale-like. However, the fief lord looked over at Carynnes fine cheekbones, at her wounds, at her blood-stained clothes. He looked at her with suchmentationoh, how lovely. Oh, how pitiful.


    His eyes were devoid of any anguish at the fact that his daughter had just killed a person. In them, only a desire to see his dead wife was evident.


    So, Carynne felt more nauseous as she continued to examine her fathers face.


    Love. Love, he said.


    Towards the Carynne of the present, it was something that was even worse than murder.


    Shese this far, but what was this.

 Chapter 47

    Chapter 47


    Father, this world Even when you heard that its a novel, did you not care?


    When youre in pain, of course Im also sad.


    No. Im not talking about that. Father, its not that.


    His daughter. His wife. Its not about that. Not about other people. Not any minor, insignificant thing. What theyre talking about here was closer and more relevant to him.


    What opinion do you have of yourself? Carynne was curious about that. She agonized over it. There was a world she could go back to. It was a faint memory now, but she could remember a family other than this one, a kinder world, more fascinating food, aparatively exotic culture, distinct animals, different dreams. That world.


    Carynne fumbled through the dim images.


    A true life. A true world.


    If she really could go back, if all this was a momentary dream


    She opened her lips, then closed them once more.


    In the end, she was still stuck with the same anguish that she was trapped in when she was a ten-year-old child. If nothing has changed, then its better not to think further.


    True love you say.


    How bizarre it was for her to say it with her own mouth.


    During my whole life For all those one hundred years If I tell you that I lived with only doubts and fear within me that entire time, what would you say?


    About her own existence, about everything in the world, about what she felt as she wandered aimlessly as though drifting in the air. About how there was no one like her anywhere, no evidence that her existence was the way that it was, no conviction that stayed as it faded away. What would he say about all this? What would he say about the days of torture she experienced, those days where only pain existed?


    Then, the fief lord answered with pity.


    My dear daughter. You have lived your life in futility.


    At that moment, Carynne made up her mind.


    You seem to believe Mother.


    Of course. I believe you just as I believed her.


    And yet he left her all alone for one entire century. Carynne wanted to tear that portrait to pieces and vent her anger. Love? A vehement sense of jealousy surged from within her. She was jealous of her dead mother.


    Im d youre dead, Mother. Did you go back to your original world? Did you leave this ce to return to your real family? Ah, I wish I could die soon, too.


    Carynne was so eaten up by jealousy that her fingers started trembling. She didnt know what to do with them, so she sped her hands together.


    Im a lot older than you. But right now it seems I have, to find my own love in earnest.


    Her voice trembled awkwardly. But the fief lord paid no mind to this.


    Who is it? Your male lead.


    Carynne hesitated for a moment before she answered.


    Its Sir Raymond.


    Mm, I knew it. Thats usible. Hm Then Verdic must have been quite upset. Thats good.


    He was so upset that he even hacked away at Carynnes neck with an axe. She didnt even have the energy to snap back at the fief lord who seemed to be finding amusement in this. Why even care about Verdic. What mattered here was her male lead.


    You really do believe Mother.


    Yes. I believe her with all my heart.


    Just as you should. If you didnt believe, then all you are right now is an aplice to a lunatics killings. Her father was a devoted zealot. The dead Catherine was his god, and Carynne was a sacred relic. She was merely evidence to his gods glory and divinity. So this was the kind of person he washe, who gave her this body she was inhabiting.


    Ah, its already dark out.


    Im going to skip dinner. I dont think I can eat at all.


    It didnt seem like shed be able to get any more information from her father. From the very start, he was an outsider. She didnt even know if what hes saying was correct. Even if Carynne were to tie his limbs and pull out his nails, he could never divulge what he didnt know in the first ce.


    He held no value to her now. There was no need to talk to him. Carynne wished to rest. If she went to dinner, then shed have to see his face again.


    Come to dinner together. The Countess and her daughter areing to visit.


    Yes.


    Carynne grimaced. She wished for a bit of time to rest. It was so difficult to digest it all because reality and fantasy were both so haphazardly intertwined. She felt gued by indigestion, but instead of her stomach, it was her mind.


    Nevertheless, the question had to be asked.


    Since Mother is someone from outside the novel, what did you think about this, Father?


    The fief lord chuckled after hearing this. At that very moment, he seemed like a young man. He smiled with such innocence, such passionsuch conviction. Towards Carynne, who he regarded as a sacred relic, he answered.


    Its truly romantic.


    * * *


    Carynnes not here?


    Ise was in high spirits. The fact that Carynne Hare wasnt anywhere in her line of sight made her mind feel at ease and her body feel rxed. As she monopolized Raymond all day without ever bumping into Carynne, Ise was fully satisfied. It felt as if she was full when she hadnt even eaten yet. Besides that, Raymond met all of Ises various demands throughout the day.


    Lord Raymond, lets talk about what happens after our engagement ceremony.


    As Ise spoke excitedly about the schedule after their engagement ceremony, Raymond immediately asked.


    Did Mister Verdic mention my situation?


    She wanted him to satiate her craving more. At this, Ise did not hide her slight difort.


    Yeees. You wont have to suffer in the army any longer.


    Is that so? Its been a while since I stepped back from the frontlines.


    No, its only natural for you to step back from there. Youll be taking on a much more important role in this countrypared to being part of the army.


    To be exact, it was a role that would benefit the Evans family more.


    Ises father was right.


    Raymond was sold to her.


    Flowers were merely in season, and in the same way, there was no way to stop a mans eyes from wandering elsewhere for a little while. Even as Verdic asionally indulged in other women and even as Ises mother smiled at another man, in the end, they both would go back to the same bed and discuss their familys affairs together.


    The most important aspect of a marriage was the fact that its a contract.


    Ive spent my whole life in the knight order.


    My, oh my. Arent you still young though? Youve got a bride to marry, but what are you talking about?


    Ise nervously scoffed and then giggled. She wished that she wouldnt be swayed by Raymond anymore. It was so miserable to crave for a mans affection when that man did not care about her at all. This was her ideal: while she was providing for and supporting Raymondpletely, she would keep him on a leash so she could watch him tter andpliment her.


    Im suddenly leaving the ce Id always been in, so its a bit worrying. And its also a little awkward for me. I thought it was something Ill be doing for the rest of my life.


    With a grin, Raymond shrugged.


    Father and I will support you in anything, so theres nothing for you to worry about.


    Ise held Raymonds hand. He then looked down at Ises hand and nodded, then he said, Is that so.


    Just as he did until now, her father would continue to be there to help her. She had no doubt that she could buy Raymond anything that he wanted. Even after hes already her husband. And, again, Ise wished that there would be no uncertainty with her fianc any longer.


    Lord Raymond, if Countess Elva will attend, will you still feel the same way about our marriage?


    Of course, Miss Ise.


    Are you happy as well?


    Narrowing her eyes, she stared at the handsome, golden man. He answered back with a picturesque smile on his lips.


    Yes. It is a joyous asion.


    His positive answer came out with not a hint of hesitation, yet it sounded rather false. Even so, this was not anymore important. What mattered here was that hes no longer in a position to show any displeasure.


    From the bottom of her heart, Ise thought that it was of no consequence to her. As long as he would look at Ise and smile at her, as long as they would enter the hall together, as long as they were in the same bed, side by side.


    Fufu.


    Do smile, my knight. My overpriced groom.


    However, Ise wouldnt let Raymond live freely like her father did. She did not wish to live like her mother. If it was that kind of rtionship, then all that was ted for her was to adjust ordingly, have a child together to fulfill the contract, then go in search of lust and affection elsewhereseparately.


    No matter how handsome and no matter how high the quality of his bloodline was, he was nothing but a stallion that was eventually sold. And his owner was none other than the Evans family.


    Even if he was of noble descent, he was not next in line for his households peerage, and it wasnt like the eldest son would share his inherited fortune with his increasingly famous younger brother.


    After the ceremony three dayster, in the end, Raymond would have toe back to the Evans household and shareughter together. Even if his smiles did note from his heart, at the very least, he would not be allowed to do as he pleased.


    Lord Raymond. I hear that youve done numerous merits on the battlefield.


    Yes.


    Im curious about just how many youve taken down.


    If Carynne held the reins through her beauty, then Ise would hold the reins through her wealth. At most, the daughter of this small domains fief lord would just continue to live here and marry her stuttering fianc. Thatd be all that there was to her insignificant little life.


    You came back all in one piece, fortunately. And thats enough.

 Chapter 48

    Chapter 48


    As she had Raymond all to herself the entire day, Ise looked absolutely enthralled during tonights dinner. She didnt tire out at all, and it didnt seem like her mouth was exhausted from pping.


    Since he was a parent, how could Verdic not know what his child was feeling when he saw how bright the look in her eyes was? Verdic smiled at his one and only daughter.


    My dear, what is it this time?


    Huh?


    She was in such a good mood that shes out of it. When Verdic guffawed, Ise turned red and held out the bracelet on her wrist to her father.


    Did Sir Raymond give this to you?


    Uh-huh. Pretty, right?


    Actually, a trinket like this wouldnt be able topare to the things she already had. But the important thing was that Raymond gave this to her. It was good thinking on Verdics part to send out an attendant to Raymond in advance to rmend the most suitable jewelry.


    Verdic took a step back, keeping this little secret to himself that he wouldnt reveal to his daughter.


    Next to him, the fief lord spoke in a low voice.


    Mister Evans, its a relief to see that your daughter is in a great mood.


    Your Lordship wont have to worry about something like that again.


    The fief lord had been letting out passive-aggressive jabs to point out how rude Verdics daughter had been for the past several days. Disregarding the fief lord outright, Verdic had a pleased look on his face as he watched his daughter and her fianc sitting together. Ise was just being too sensitive.


    With Carynne, who was so overly beautiful for a youngdy of her age, out of sight, Ise Evans returned to her vivacious demeanor around her fianc.


    At the same time, Raymond carried himself like the well-bred nobleman that he was as he gently led the atmosphere and shared pleasant conversation that Ise found interesting. The level of his wit was befitting of a man of his ability.


    Verdic didnt want the young man to treat Ise like a mere fling. However, he also wanted to protect his dear childs fantasy for even a little bit.


    When he shouted at herst time, it had been necessary to shatter that false illusion that she saw, but it was his hope after all to see his daughterwho was prone to cryinugh to her hearts content. Even if what he was doing was nothing short of cold-bloodedly pounding away at a calctor to achieve this.


    Like any parent, he sorted his emotions for his child. Then, Verdic turned to the fief lord when he brought up a question.


    Does your daughter look like her mother?


    She resembles me more than her mother.


    My daughter looks exactly like her mother. Have you heard about it?


    Lady Catherines renown is very widely known, isnt it? At one point, we wanted to sponsor her some clothes.


    However, she retired just a year after she had debuted in high society and thereafter got stuck in this backwoods countryside. She remained secluded, and then she passed away like that.


    Verdic held no special feelings for Catherine, but he felt sorry for Carynne because of their close resemnce.


    Then I would be grateful if you could help out my daughter with her clothes when she makes her debut.


    I will keep that in mind.


    Verdic gritted his teeth.


    This status!


    Even though Verdic had all the rights to the fief, the Evans familys position still fell under the Hare family. All because of this status difference. This country was governed by the nobility and the royalty, and so there was no other choice but to bow down and show respect.


    It would be wonderful to see Your Lordships daughter and my daughter make their debut together.


    Itd be quite the sight to see how <i>this</i> Hare households daughter would turn into a mere handmaiden for the Evans family.


    Chuckling, Verdic raised a ss towards the fief lord.


    Completely different from Verdics own daughter, all the fief lords daughter had going for her was her beauty. Both her silence and her smile were her ornaments. Was the maturity beyond her age in which she carried herself a product of her rough upbringing? If so, then much of the adversities she experienced must have been created by Verdic himself.


    Like Ise, hes sure that hes had a lot of influence on Carynnes current personality. Verdic believed that all young people were childish. It was normal even with teenagers as old as Ise. So a teenager like Carynne, who was excessively reserved and well behaved, wasnt actually mature in thinking. Shes just been knocked down to that point.


    Your Lordships daughter must not be feeling well.


    Being so weak like that, Carynne was clearly inferior to Ise. With his head down, the fief lord mumbled out his answer.


    Mm, her physical condition has weakened a little. Many different events and happenings are ovepping after all.


    Stay that way and nevere out.


    Verdic pleaded inwardly. It pleased him to see a pretty barmaid or a lovely handmaiden at home, but it was extremely annoying to see that his daughters rival was beautiful.


    Wasnt it so peaceful with Carynne gone? Verdic didnt like how that young woman had amand over the atmosphere amongst people. Because of that face that was stunning for no particr merit, his daughter started feeling depressed and the deal was faltering.


    Verdic wanted to proceed with the deal without a hitch.


    May I ask, is Lady Hare ill?


    Before Verdic knew it, Raymond approached the fief lord and inquired.


    Lord Raymond, rather than that


    When Raymond walked over to ask the fief lord, Ise immediately clung to him. The two middle-aged men, at the same moment, turned blue in the face.


    One man wanted to soothe his daughter as she was hurt, and the other man was slighted by the young womans clingy behavior.


    Verdic nced sideways at the fief lord, then spoke to Ise.


    Ise, why dont you visit Lady Hare in her roomter?


    Huuuh?


    His daughter looked back at him as though she couldnt understand why he was doing this. However, he urged Ise again.


    It seems like shes very ill. She has even skipped dinner tonight.


    Uh Um Alright, Ill visit her.


    There was a sour look on her face as she clung tighter on Raymonds arm. She looked at her father with nervousness in her eyesthose big eyes that looked innocent.


    Go and see if shes doing alright. And tell her to be sure to attend the engagement ceremony that would take ce three dayster.


    It was a demand, not a request.


    It was as if Verdic was the lord taking care of the guest. Even so, its Miss Hare here who was making a bigger mistake.


    She was still under the illusion that her family was the owner of thisnd.


    Is there a need to force a sick person to attend?


    Unable to watch this scene unfold, Raymond stepped forward.


    Hoho, Sir Raymond. Its good that youre very popr.


    Mister Verdic.


    Its nothing.


    Verdic gleefully admired the fief lords hardened expression. It didnt matter whether Carynne really was ill, and neither did it matter whether Raymond was doing this because he wasnt fullymitted to this engagement. However, if Raymond were to say any more here, then he would only be confirming thetter.


    The Countess will be attending the marriage cereah, no, the <i>engagement</i> ceremony, so wouldnt it be a shame? Ise will also be beholden to thisnd for a rather long time. In various ways, it would be good to be shown around, yes? Verdic said.


    Hm, thats an entertaining way of phrasing it.


    Yes, yes.


    It seemed like the fief lord wanted to say something more, but he soon gave a smile again. He stepped back to instruct Dun to do something.


    The music had slowed down because the musicians had be wary of the brief war of nerves. On behalf of the fief lord, Verdic told the musicians to y a waltz.


    The music then began anew, followed by an awkward meal full of emptyughter.


    It really was the right decision to move up the engagement ceremony. Verdic saw his daughtersplexion improving noticeably, and she picked up her silverware again. As if the finest ingredients had been brought in to celebrate the festivities, each dish set before them showed off exotic tastes.


    Mm Its not as good as the dish that day though.


    But that was of no matter. Having an engagement ceremony was the same thing as having the wedding itself. Business was going smoothly, and the countess seat in the assembly was as good as his. Most of everything was smooth sailing.


    But there was still something missing.


    Just one thing.


    What could it be?


    His tongue yearned for the taste of ecstasy he had that day. Verdic smacked his lips together in regret. Verdic wished to test the level of food he could enjoy in this houseto their very limits. Once the countess arrived, would they recreate that gourmet feast and serve it again?


    With the fief lord on one side, Raymond on another, and theing negotiation with the countess, just the thought of it all made Verdic feel full. His eyes curved thinly as he looked at his daughters smiling face.


    Its all so smooth.

 Chapter 49

    Chapter 49


    The fief lord stared down at the letter that the mute boy had handed to him. It was from his one and only daughter. He had stared at it for a long time, but even then, the contents of the letter did not change.


    He let out a sigh. He was already distressed enough during a time like this. Ever since the day his wife had died, the world around Lord Hare had turned gray. His duties as a fief lord held little importance to him, and even his daughter, who resembled his wife closely, was not a source offort for him.


    Ever since that time he was looking all over the woods where Catherine had run away to, the years had passed in an instant. When he regained his senses, it was already after Verdic had, at some point, taken away many of his rights as the fief lord. However, he did not feel any resentment towards Verdic. There was nothing left in this world that made him feel.


    However, this letter shocked him a bit.


    He rubbed both palms against his eyes. He was exhausted.


    He let out a series of long, drawn-out sighs and sped his hands together, interlocking his fingers. Then, he raised his head to look at his wifes portrait.


    I believe you.


    Thats why he did all that.


    Rising from his seat, he then set the letter on fire. The paper distorted at the heat and soon crumbled in the mes. However, the contents remained to be deeply engraved in the fief lords mind, as though branded permanently.


    * * *


    How much medicine did you put in this?


    When Carynne refused to eat, Dun eventually brought back food for her personally. Watching him shift his eyes like that, they reminded her of a dead fishs eyes on the chopping board. From that look alone, Carynne could guess that Dun had already heard the entire story from Borwen and the fief lord.


    After a while, he spoke timidly.


    A lot.


    Youre a terribly magnificent family doctor. Its apliment, so be thankful.


    Dun remained silent.


    Lying on her bed, Carynne sat up and stared intently at the drugged food. So thats it. The reason why Dun was her fianc. He was given the role of the next fief lord not because of family politics, but because of the drugs he could administer.


    His job was to be a butcher and a cook. Carynne wondered just how much drugs hed slip in along with the spices in the dishes he made. Now she knew why the meals in the Hare manor were exceptionally terriblepared to the food she ate at Raymonds ce. Just thinking about how much drugs shed been fed through these meals made her enraged. Compared to anything else, this was what she was the most furious with. It was already a short life, so why must they take away from her the joy of eating?


    Right, if I think about it that way, everything falls into ce.


    From her own memories and the knowledge of her mothers suitors, Carynne knew that she had many opportunities ahead of her. She was the sole heir to this estate. And her outward appearance was truly remarkable.


    Given more time, she could have had her pick from a lot more men. She had many choices, considering how many second sons of noble households were out there who didnt have the rights to their familys inheritance and title. Besides them, there was also the nouveau riche who wanted to gain peerage.


    If my mother had married someone from the royal family, it would have been possible to go overseas. What a shame. What do you think, Mister Family Doctor?


    I, I think you might have been normal. If you were born in, in a different household.


    Whoop-dee-doo.


    What a way with words. Carynne pushed away the meal that Dun brought for her. She didnt feel like eating at all.


    Staring at the gaunt cheeks of her skinny rtive, she thought As expected, hes far from the word handsome even if she tried to look at him favorably.


    Now that you mention it, if I had been born in some other country, I might have either gone through the same repetitions, or my mother might have continued hers.


    Even as a woman who was in no position to meet mega rich people or nobles of higher statures, it was by no means impossible for her. This had already been proven by her mother. Rather, it was a morganatic marriage. She was a daughter of a noble man and a woman who had once been courted by a member of the royal family. From ancient times and still to the present, a womans beauty was held in high regard.


    From a contractual perspective, it was a normal marriage where each side could get what they needed. Carynne herself, if she were to go to the capital, was not the most beautiful woman there. She was even the one who had the most humble background. Rather, if the other person wasnt from as high of a stature as the royal family, then he would be a better match for her. However, the fief lord had already engaged Carynne to Dun.


    So, eight years in the abbey?


    Thats right.


    Youve been studying medicine for thest eight years, yet youre the next fief lord? What a joke. Haha, amazing.


    Carynne snorted.


    She couldnt believe that they took this poor distant rtive, who had been studying medicine all this time, and forced him into the seat of the next fief lord. Her father had pulled the strings to situate a man like Dun in this position not only to cure Carynnes insanity, but also so he could be booted off at any given time.


    From the very beginning, the fief lord had deliberately ced Dun in that position to prepare for when Carynne would meet the real male lead.


    Looks like Father and Mother had quite the fun dealings.


    Carynne could guess what was on the fief lords mind.


    Catherine, who had numerous suitors, had been engaged to one of them, but she ended that engagement and married Lord Hare. Right now, the fief lord was waiting for the real male lead to appear and even set up an obstacle called Dunas it had been his case in the past.


    It was a reiteration of the  plot .


    Do you believe any of it? What me and my parents are saying.


    Wh, What I think will not matter.


    After hearing such a scrumptious story, why are you keeping your mouth shut?


    Looking at it in another light, Dun wasnt exactly losing anything here. Even if he did not be the next fief lord, Dun would be given the chance to take charge of the parish.


    Besides that, if he wouldnt be a clergyman and wouldter be left out of the group, he had something to fall back on because he had learned the practice of medicine. Actually, his influence was further strengthened because he could take care of Carynne while he was right next to her.


    Its not a bad deal for each side if it was considered this way.


    What do you think, though? Do you believe it just like Father? Do you believe me and my mother?


    Dun blinked and managed to stutter out an answer.


    I-I do.


    Why dont you take out your doctors license and throw it at the feet of the elephant in the circus, hm? Im sure itll stomp on it very thoroughly for you. Make sure you send that elephant over to the parish while youre at it.


    Despite Carynnes retort, Dun continued.


    I-If I dont believe you, will anything change?


    And what would change if you believe me?


    Silence ensued once more. Just as she was about to get annoyed from the waiting, the answer came out right then.


    Com, fort.


    What?


    No, I couldnt hear it properly, but I wont say such nonsense back. Im at a loss for words, thats why. So,fort is good, yeah.


    Carynne was dumbfounded by Duns unexpected answer.


    So you believe Youre saying that you believe me here?


    Its true that Carynne asked the question, but she had been expecting the opposite answer toe back her way.


    It would be more reasonable for you to say that this entire family is just insane But its even funnier that <i>Im </i>the one saying this.


    Even still, Carynne had half a mind that both she and her mother were crazy at the same time. At least, its perhaps at the level that no one else in the world would be able to prove.


    It was enough to ask oneself, isnt it that this world seems like a shadow of an idea? Its a story that had nothing to do with reality and didnt any longer cause any ripples that affected her.


    But since Dun was a doctor, a <i>priest</i>, he should have denied her regressions. Unlike her father, he should be thinking that Carynne was simply delusionalthat this was her only life and that she was not repeating it.


    She wanted to hear such sweet words.


    You have your own life as well, after all. Sure.


    If you didnt, then your life would be nothing but the life of a bred stallion. It must feel terrible to confirm that you have the kind of life that had only a moderate amount of excitement.


    Carynne could guess. Such jealousy was universal, even if where she was now was different. What a self-centered, egotistic artiction it would be for a side character to say.


    Anyone who acknowledged that, in their own life, they were the main character would actually have made it so that both the lord and madam of this fiefdom were the supporting characters.


    Dun, do you needfort?


    So, if I were to choose Dun over Raymond here, would he be my true love? Isn''t that quite the usible story, Father? To refuse the handsome, attractive suitor and find true love elsewhere. Or, for a simple kind of love to be real, like a bluebird in ones heart.


    Huh?


    Carynne reached out and stroked Duns cheek.


    Rationally speaking, this wouldnt be a bad deal for Dun either. However, emotionally speaking, this was no different from losing what you had once received. Carynne knew how any ordinary persons mind worked.


    All that greed. Though it was not originally theirs and had only been lent to them, it was natural for a person to struggle with a sense of lossthat was a human beings greed.


    Whats more, if its a man and a woman whos had rtions with each other before.


    Carynne wanted Dun to fight against Raymond.


    Prove your love to me. For the sake of ending this.


    The one who needs cfort is you.


    Yeah. Youre right.


    However, Carynne knew Duns ending.


    But I dont need it right now.


    She remembered.


    He wasnt the answer either. Her marriage with Dun was just like thatit provided no answer. Carynne had already gone through many choices before. At least, Carynne could now guess why Dun so anxiously turned to God after they had gotten married.


    It was a vition of the contract, of course. He was a man who had no right to take her away and say that she was his.


    She lowered her hand.


    Dun. Im breaking off our engagement.


    Duns expression became distorted at that moment. But that was all.


    Alright.


    Again, he was no fun. If he felt any greed at all for the thing that was given to him yet taken away, then he should stand up and yell out for it. And yet he had no courage to do so and instead only sulked.


    This was the attitude of the side character who could not win against the main character. Wanting toin yet not willing to revoltit was what a criminal would do as he adapted to the role assigned to him.


    Carynne took Duns long, pale fingers. sping his hand, which tried to move away, she looked up at Dun and murmured.


    You know, Dun. Why didnt you just die back then?


    She looked into Duns eyes. Her own face was reflected in his ck eyes.


    Carynne could not read anything from those eyes except for her own features.


    Then I would have been able to live a real life.


    You, too. Me as well.


    Duns mouth was no longer open.


    * * *


    The cold air during dawn cut against her cheek. Carynne walked through the chilly summer meadow. The cold air cleared her head. It was the time of the season that she could enjoy. Here, an early morning walk at daybreak, as she avoided the eyes of others, was something that delighted her. Carynne quite liked this time.


    Its a little cold.


    Toms clothes were thinner than hers, so Carynne no longerined. Further into the meadow, therey the graves of the Hare family. Even as they were under the sun, it felt colder.


    Is it colder because of the graves, or does it actually feel colder than usual?


    Tom tilted his head to the side. Carynne wasnt waiting for an answer anyway, so she continued forward.


    Atop the grave she was looking for was a statue, so it stood out. Once again, she read the name on the tombstone.


    Here lies Catherine,  Carynne s no, maybe <i>my </i>mother.


    Carynne felt sentimental for a moment as she stared at her mothers grave. She had never visited it all these years. The statues hair was made out of bronze, there was a wrinkle of a smile, and it was overall quite borately sculpted, but it was white and cold.


    No matter how good the artist could make out the likeness of a person, the color of the skin had faded, they were still and unmoving, and the person looked different from the memories of those who knew her.


    In the fief lords mind, what did Catherine look like?


    Carynne touched the statues cheek. It was as cold as she had expected. The statue conveyed deaths touch.


    I want to open the casket.


    Tom approached, however the stone tomb that could be moved by only many strong men would barely even budge from the hands of one boy and one girl.


    Forget it.


    Shey down on the grave. The summer sky was clear and the stars that were still there looked as though they had been poured across the expanse. If she stayed still and stared at the heavens above, those hundreds of millions of blurry stars in the midst of the few bright ones could be seen once more.


    A sea of stars. The cold wind on the ground was nothing more than something to make the starlight shine even more. It was a starry dawn.


    She was enraptured by the permanence of those stars. They were so beautiful. The sky and thendscape did not change. It had been like this for thest century. Perhaps this world would stay the same in the future as wellthis world which was like any other world thats trapped within a book, so vast and terrifyingly old.


    Mother, it seems you truly have passed on.


    For some reason, Carynne wanted to cry.


    Im jealous to death.


    Lady Nora Catherine Hare.

 Chapter 50: Engagement ceremony

    Chapter 50: Engagement ceremony


    <b> 07. Engagement ceremony</b>


    Actually, there was still no answer.


    She knew so little. At the futile and empty answer her father had given her, Carynnes first reaction was to be dumbfounded.


    But right now, rather than worrying, Carynne was being swept away by a more unusual feeling.


    It was hope.


    The hope that she could, at longst, rest.


    There was one other person who went through all this before her. If Catherine truly had experienced the same thing as Carynne, then the possibility was there for Carynne to seed as well.


    One other person just like her existed in this world. Oh, how sweet it was to know even just that.


    Carynne sat in front of the harpsichord and yed on the keys, feeling refreshed. It was too early for people toe out, but it also wasnt an early enough time for their sleep to be disturbed by her ying.


    The cool air of daybreak enveloped the room. As she yed a cheerful tune for the morning, Carynne spoke to Tom, who was standing next to her.


    Finally, there is hope that I can die. Dont you know how delightful this is?


    There was a bright smile full of joy on Carynnes lips as she said this to Tom. Whether or not he believed or not believed, the boy just closed his mouth and nodded.


    Carynne sometimes felt regrettable about Tom being a mute. She wanted to see a more interesting response from him, and theres only so much a mute boy could impart. All Tom did was to close his mouth, then nod or shake his head.


    If I die, wouldnt it be good for you?


    Gosh, I didnt mean that spitefully.


    Holding back the peal ofughter threatening to burst through her lips, Carynne increased the tempo as she pressed down on the keys.


    Im in support of revenge. Thats how life is, after all. Its not fair.


    With one look at this boys face, who would be able to guess his age? Tom looked a lot cleanerpared to when he was rolling around in the streets, but one could only guess whats inside that mouth which he didnt open.


    And most of all, his demeanor was different. He didnt have the same look that kids from the back alleys hadthe look thats full of the moments miseryrather, he had the eyes of a person who had experienced a more advanced form of pain. In fact, if he were to live like that for the rest of his life, then he would neither yearn for another persons life nor would hein about his own.


    Hmm


    Should I kill him now?


    Carynne calcted the date. Tom would soon die from illness. Yet, even as he didnt look well, he had yet to copse thus fat. He still died young in the past when she had taken care of him, butpared to back then, he was holding up pretty well now.


    Carynne looked closely at the boys cheek. His demeanor wasnt pleasant, but his body was more alive than ever. He didnt look like he was going to drop dead right away. How fun.


    Normally, with these kinds of developments, if the child is kept alive, theylle back for revengeter.


    Carynne pressed down hard on the keys.


    You got surprised?


    He couldnt speak, but his gasp could still be heard. Carynne grinned, then apologized.


    Sorry. Still, you look healthier than I expected. It amazes me, thats why.


    Tom answered through his facial expressions. Hes nervous.


    Carynne returned to ying on her instrument again. The piece was as lively as how she was feeling.


    Should I kill him? I want to kill him. I think itll be alright even if I kill him. Hes going to die anyway, right? But if he doesnt die, it might be more fun. It all started when I killed Nancy and then it all unraveled like this. If I kill Tom, what will happen this time? How chaotic. How difficult. Should I spare him for now and then kill him next time? Whatll be better?


    Mdy!


    Her agony shattered.


    If youe outside like this without dressing up first, what should we doooo.


    I always look perfect though.


    Wow That confidence


    While looking drowsy, Donna brought over a towel that had been soaked in warm water. Carynne wiped her face as she lowered the lid of the harpsichords keys.


    I guess Im having fun these days.


    With ying your instrument?


    Mm, sure.


    Carynne realized that she naturally slipped into relishing murder yet again. She started doing it in the name of fun from the beginning, but she now had a new reason. Even when she was told that the answer was love, she did not wish to change the principles of her actions.


    Ill dial it back.


    You said you were sick, Mdy, but youve only been pretending? Still though, you cant y at night. Its said that the Countess ising.


    I know I got it.


    Damn plot development. No sympathy forborers inside the novel.


    First, we have to get you dressed up.


    Howe you look more excited?


    Hehe. The seamstress brought in the new clothes yesterday and theyre <i>so</i> pretty.


    Her hands are so slow that I cant believe she finished the garments only a day before.


    Although, it couldnt be helped since the customized dress was made after Ises. She let out this smallint, but as Donna was unaware of the situation, she replied back excitedly.


    But still, its really pretty.


    I got it.


    Mdy, since the leftover cloth came in as well, can I make a ribbon for your hair?


    Youve be thorough, too, after dealing with the people from Evans. Fine. Do as you please.


    With a spring in her step, Donna cheerily left the room first. Did she like it that much?


    Carynne closed her eyes, preupied by the warmth of the towel that Donna had given her.


    Across the hall, she could hear Donna saying that she had drawn the bath already. Carynne sighed and followed behind the maid. Its not that she didnt like dressing upits just annoying. There were so many other things for her to think about besides the countess.


    Still, she hoped that she could uncover more information from here on out, just as she had been doing so far.


    Carynne paused for a moment to turn her head, then she asked.


    By the way, Tom. Did you properly deliver my letter to Father?


    The boy nodded.


    Alright.


    Carynne headed back to her room.


    I heard you were sick.


    And Ise was there, waiting in front of her bedroom door.


    Ise.


    The bathwater was going to cool down at this rate. Carynne let out a sigh without hiding it. At this, Ise made a face.


    You dont even look sick.


    Ises eyebrows were furrowed.


    What are you so unhappy about. Its the first time that such a grand engagement ceremony was going to be held so ostentatiously.


    It was an unparalleled opportunity for Ise, yet here she was, not concealing any of her difort towards Carynne.


    Carynne tilted her head to the side at this, but soon greeted the other young woman.


    Thank you for your concern, Miss Ise.


    Might be good to give a smile here.


    Ise paused for a moment, but then she hurriedly called out to Carynne again when she tried to leave.


    Carynne!


    Yes.


    After calling her like so, silence once again enveloped them as she hesitated to speak the next words.


    Come to my engagement ceremony.


    I dont think my condition is good enough for that though. I havent regained much energy yet.


    Are you seriously saying that when youve got enough energy to y the piano so early in the morning?


    It doesnt take that much energy out of me to y using my fingers. And its a harpsichord.


    But thats not the point here?


    Miss Ise, your tone seems very pointed right now.


    Carynne had to control her lips from curling. Wasnt this just a pointless attack? Carynne thought about what to do with Ise, who was eager to quarrel at the break of dawn.


    Its been quite a while since Carynne had felt so refreshed. It was a happy morning where Carynne had confirmed for herself that hope was in sight, yet <i>why</i> was Ise doing this to Carynne during the time that shes happy?


    The Countess ising today, but are you going to stay cooped up? If youre that sick.


    I will have to go out, of course.


    Certainly, since it was Countess Elva. She was the young madam who had a formidable personality and whose husband was the Minister of Finance. Verdic was desperate to establish connections with that very official.


    It wasughable how Ise liked to equate herself to the countess. Now that Carynne thought about it, would the mistake of revealing their investment funds bemitted here again?


    For tonights attendance, dont you think itll be too much if you miss two dinners in a row?


    Ise?


    She spoke in this way.


    Carynne looked at Ise with a bit of bewilderment, as though saying,


    Its going to be great for you if I donte, but why are you being like this?

 Chapter 51

    Chapter 51


    Ise was nervous about Carynne catching Raymonds interest. Even as they smiled andughed when theyre in front of each other, drew portraits and spent time together over tea, they were not friends.


    They werepetitors for the heart of one man, and also the victim and perpetrator in terms of their family businesses. Ise knew that at the very least.


    But why was she forcing Carynne to attend the ceremony? She obviously didnt want her to be there.


    Is this a request from Mister Verdic?


    The reason why Ise was asking for Carynnes attendance against her will must be because of her father. Hes the only one who could supersede Ises whims.


    No! Its <i>my</i> request. Be sure to attend my engagement ceremony.


    Ise shook her head and strongly denied it, but Carynne didnt believe her.


    Haa. I understand.


    Ise narrowed her eyes, waving her folding fan lightly. Sheughed inwardly.


    It would be great if Lord Dun can also attend my engagement ceremony.


    Ah, so thats what youre thinking?


    Carynne finally understood what shes getting at. She got it now. This wasnt Verdics idea at all, and at this, Carynne, too,ughed inwardly. This was a trick to keep Carynne away from Raymond.


    But what to do?


    Carynne replied with an exaggerated shrug.


    Mm, Im thinking of breaking off my engagement with Dun.


    I beg your pardon?


    It just turned out that way.


    Ises nose scrunched up <i>hard.</i> She looked ridiculous.


    B-By chance Have you found someone else you love?


    If Carynne were to say, Yes, its Sir Raymond, she wondered whether Ise would rip out her hair right here. But Carynne hadnt lost her mind that far just yet.


    Who knows.


    At the vague answer, Ises expression hardened with tension.


    Youre truly a bad person, arent you?


    How on earth did youe to this conclu


    You broke your promise!


    Dun agreed though?


    Whaaat?


    We were strangers when our parents decided to promise us to one another. Even now, we havent gotten to know each other that much yet.


    Carynne smiled as she told a bold-faced lie.


    Your father will immediately die from.


    If something like that happens, so what? If hes already dead.


    That wont happen. But you know, I also want to go out to the city like you. And Miss Ise, didnt you tell mest time that youll definitely take me there? To the opera house in the capital.


    Ise showed just now how much a persons face could change.


    See youter, Ise. I also need to get ready, you see.


    * * *


    The preparations to the dcor werepleted magnificently.


    I heard you werent feeling well, Raymond asked.


    Yes. Im still a little tired.


    Was it alright to lose to Ise once? You never know. Friendship could also be true love, or something like that.


    This was on Carynnes mind as she nced sideways at Ise. Of course, that wasnt the case right now.


    Carynne made an effort to look more pitiful today. She tightened her corset to make her face look paler, put on a powder that was lighter than the usual, dulled down the color of her lips, and put on a slightly darker shade under her eyes. This was all to create the perfect image of a sick person.


    But you looked fine in the morning


    Ises reaction was much too funny, and Carynne subsequently leaned back towards Raymond. Naturally, he coughed Carynne.


    <i>Cough, cough.</i>


    Are you alright?


    Of course, she was only faking her illness. At the other side, Dun gnashed his teeth while the look in his eyes made him seem like hes about to throw a fit.


    Carynne furtively punched the air at him. <i>Piss off.</i>


    Entering the hall with the fief lord in tow, Borwen made a promation.


    The Countess has arrived!


    Carynne approached her father and whispered quietly.


    Have you thought about what I said in the letter?


    The fief lords face turned as pale as ashes. Uncharacteristically, Carynne clung closer to her father.


    Didnt you read it?


    I read it. Ive also prepared for it But I dont understand what you want.


    The fief lord took off his hat and whispered back equally as quietly, waiting for the countess to enter. His fingertips were shaking minutely.


    Why do you want me dead?


    You really dont know why?


    Carynne asked with her eyes wide open. She replied to the fief lord as if she truly couldntprehend his question.


    The fief lord looked at Carynnes expression, which seemed to say, Shouldnt you die? Its a matter of course. It was difficult for him to imagine what his own face looked like right now. Even his voice was hoarse.


    Yes. I really dont know.


    Carynne stared dazedly at her fathers face, then stammered back.


    Um, ah, riiight. Im sorry. Im being so terribly inappropriate. This is all so familiar to me that I dont know what it sounds like to others Ummm, yes Right.


    She truly looked sorry. She apologized for the inhospitable nature of the letter when what she was asking for was his death. The fief lord tried to brush off the stray thought that came to mind, then he struggled to reply.


    I did all those things for you until now. How are you going to get by without me?


    I have a few reasons, but First of all, Father, I dont need your protection. As I told you before, what I want is not a safe bubble.


    Carynne was a little disappointed that the fief lord seemed to not understand. If she were to kill someone else and hed cover it up, didnt he think that the de would turn ande right back at her? Wasnt that how people were?


    What Carynne wanted was a change to her environment even greater than before. And hadnt killing Nancy changed this much? After suffering through a long drawn-out illness, the fief lord would die. Hes set to die anyway, so it wasnt so unreasonable to make him die earlier.


    Still, since the time of his death would be moved up, there surely would be changes in response to this. In many ways, he was a safe subject to observe.


    And thats not the only reason.


    More than anything, what I want to see is a confirmation of love.


    Carynnes face was full of innocence. She looked her age at that momentit was the face of a child asking a question towards her father out of curiosity, then listening patiently for the answer.


    So, the fief lord vacantly stared at that expression and asked back.


    Love?


    Yes.


    That, right now


    You still cant understand?


    However, instead of giving the answer outright, Carynne raised one finger over her lips.


    <i>Shh.</i>


    Father, Lady Elva has entered.


    Carynne interrupted him. The fief lord showed an anxious and ufortable expression right then, but what was there to do? Right now,pared to exining the reason why she was demanding her fathers death, work was more important.


    Carynne herself found the situation hrious, so she bit her lower lip and schooled her features. A mockingugh, a bitterugh, an explosiveugh. Whatever kind ofughter. Dont do that. Dontugh. Concentrate on work right now.


    Lady Elva Fitzgerald. With a face that looked as though it was carved out of marble, she spoke with a full voice andmanded over her husband, and she also had a very impulsive disposition. She imbibed the ambition of a noblewoman, to the point that she also pushed her weak-willed husband into politics. And, she was also excessively fond of gambling.


    Its been a while, Verdic Evans.


    Thank you for epting my request, Lady Elva Fitzgerald.


    With a loud <i>ck</i>, she opened her fan and cast down her gaze. Even if its true that the vacation spot she was in until recently was nearby, it was due to Verdics pressure that she came here.


    She had lost in a gamble a while back, and because of this, she had borrowed arge sum of money from Verdic. This also led to her being forced to arrange a meeting between Verdic and Count Fitzgerald.


    Better take that Verdic down a peg or twoter.


    The fief lord whispered quietly.


    Verdics station was lower than the fief lord, Carynne and Raymond altogether. However, Verdic was the first person that the countess greeted, while Verdic replied to her with only a nod. This didnt seem to please the fief lord.


    That means something to you, Father?


    Once youre dead, it all wouldnt matterbut Carynne didnt say this out loud.


    Raymond was much too close.


    How resolute.


    The fief lord smiled bitterly.


    Lets talk more about itter. About why I have to do that.


    Lady Elva moved on to the fief lord.


    Carynne smirked because as soon as Lady Elva walked past Verdic, her expression hardened.


    Isnt a debtors position easy, Madam?


    Its the first time Carynne was meeting the madam this early.

 Chapter 52

    Chapter 52


    <b>Chapter 52</b>


    <i>trigger warning: mentions of suicide. this topic will be mentioned again here and there throughout the novel. i wont leave another trigger warning in the future.</i>


    Lady Elvas little daughter, Lianne, followed after her mother, then she looked up at Carynnes face. The girls eyes widened.


    Wow.


    Children were easy. They liked pretty things and their thoughts could easily be revealed through this. Tom was a kid who had already be too quiet and less interesting.


    At the thought, Carynne grinned. Lady Lianne smiled as well.


    The fief lord kissed the back of Countess Elvas hand and gave a simple greeting.


    Its so delightful that youvee all the way here, Lady Elva.


    The festival is quite spectacr. Lianne found it fun, too, so I enjoyed myself as well.


    Im d that you did.


    At this point, the owner of thisnd was the Hare family, not Verdic. The countess turned slowly and came closer to Carynne, who was next to her father.


    You look like your mother.


    Carynne heard this all the time, but its like she was hearing it anew this time. She greeted the countess back with a slightly mncholy smile.


    I am very delighted to meet you, Lady Elva.


    The countess must have met Catherine once before. How much did she know? Carynne realized that she had been too emotional back then when she had killed Deere, and she felt a bit regrettable. Right now, she hoped that Lady Elva could be of help to her instead of Missus Deere.


    She was so lovely, too. Come to my salonter if youll be making your debut at the capital.


    Thank you.


    Thus far, Carynne had regressed to the past back many times, but she had never been interested in her dead mother. Was Nancy responsible for that, too? It would remain a mystery for this iteration. Carynne would just ask Nancy in the next life.


    Carynne sat down and brought out her fan, watching Ise fume in anger as Madam Elva had not even listened to Ises greeting. Captivated by Carynnes breathtaking beauty, Madam Elvas little daughter was chattering about while holding onto her mothers hand.


    Ise and Verdic were both absolutely incensed. That reaction of theirs was more precious than gold.


    Carynne truly appreciated her mother. She gave her life, this face, and death as well, so its safe to say that her mother had given her almost everything.


    After observing those two, Carynne turned around and found her father next to her.


    Then, isnt it time for me to hear your reason?


    As he sat down at the chair next to Carynne, the fief lord looked over at the countess and Raymond as they were having a conversation.


    The reason.


    Yes. Is it because youre curious about how much your life will change?


    I told you already before.


    Exin it more kindly this time.


    Carynne was surprised to hear his response, which sounded like a childs whining.


    The fact that she had been repeating her life and that the world was a mere novelfor someone to believe these two things, that person was bound to be childish. Like a daughter whining to her father.


    Of course, the person doing it now didnt look cute at all.


    Itd be nice to experience a new life. One that isnt under your protection, Father.


    What I wish for you is happiness.


    Um Father, I dont have a penchant for that thing. I want to see different variables, different truths, a different ending. Be it death, or even life.


    The fief lords expression turned extremely agitated.


    I know it sounds like a foolish, lofty dream, but Its like that, Father.


    Carynne beckoned a passing servant, who then handed two champagne sses.


    Im thirsty. You, Father?


    Yes.


    Golden liquid trickled into the sses. As the servant walked away, Carynne dropped her voice to a whisper, much quieter than the music flowing around them.


    Father, you said you believe in Mother.


    I do.


    And you said that Mother was freed from this spell thanks to your love.


    Even Carynne herself felt nervous about how frivolous the word sounded, but the fief lord nodded grimly back.


    Thats right.


    But Father, I mean. To be honest with you, its all very I feel skeptical about all this. For a temporary emotion like that to make my life for one hundred years


    Carynne couldnt help but down the alcohol in her ss. She was getting more emotional in this life.


    Its so abstract and vague, Father.


    How can love be vague? What will save you is absolute faith and true love.


    <i>Shut up.</i>


    Father, youre not me. If youve got a hole in your head for all of one hundred years, tooif youve been killed by all sorts of things, too, then Im sure it would be difficult for you to say that.


    Its hard. One hundred years, Father. Theres a limit to the people just one person could meet. Tell me, is there someone who could date, build a rtionship and even get married in less than a year? Ive ended up with Sir Raymond a couple of times, and if hes not my supposed match, then what am I supposed to do now?


    Find true love.


    What if my true love is beyond the White Mountain Range, dying from a stray bullet? If not that, what if my true love is a street bum whos out on the pavement, sick and dying? Im not even really sure if Ive read the novel.


    Who was the man destined for her? If the cause here was ack of love, then who else should she meet? But the men who she had met before were far inferior to Raymond.


    Is the intensity of love the problem? Those people I met before, did they not love me the way you loved Mother? Im curious, really.


    She wondered, why was it that Mothers love was Father. And how much did Father love Mother?


    The fief lord watched Carynnes fingers as they tightened over the champagne ss, her knuckles going white. Then, he opened his lips again.


    Then the only way I can help you is


    Carynne looked up to face the fief lord as he spoke. She was expressionless.


    Please show me proof of your love, she said.


    How?


    If you truly believe, if you truly love, then you would not be afraid of death. Once I die again, youlle back to life, Father. And even if you really do die, you shouldnt be scared of anything. After all, youll be able to see her.


    Ah.


    Of course, the extent of it Its for the sake of confirmation. If you refuse to do this, then theres nothing I can do.


    Carynne shrugged.


    With all the servants in the manor along with Dun, I wont be able to force you if you waver.


    She looked into the fief lords gray eyes, and in those eyes was the reflection of his daughters face, the exact mirror image of his wife.


    But whatever you choose, Ill be able to confirm it. The extent of your love, Father.


    Carynne lifted the empty ss. Some distance away, a servant came forward and refilled the ss. The lord also raised his own ss. At that corner of the hall, the father and daughter raised their sses for a toast.


    Ah, I knew it. Everything tastes so much better without the drugs. Dun, that terrible jerk.


    Dont be so hard on him. It was all for your sake.


    But what he did was too much. There must have been a couple times that I died from overdose. And I dont like it because Ive had a taste of gourmet food elsewhere.


    Which ce do you like the most?


    Outside the novel What, wrong answer?


    He looked troubled.


    Why dont you choose one from here?


    Sir Raymonds head chef is magnificent. Hes called Mister Cray, and hes bald, you know. Oh, but he hasnt been hired yet, helle in after three months.


    Is that so.


    As she continued to chatter, Carynne noticed that the fief lord was staring nkly at the silverware on the table.


    Um, this is a trivial warning, but Its difficult to use a knife like that. Ive tried it before.


    ThatI wasnt thinking of using this.


    The fief lord averted his gaze, perhaps a little embarrassed.


    It can be a little scary at first. I wasnt used to it either and I failed several times. Never try to slit your wrists. Youre going to have to cut into your wrist until youre halfway through to make it work, and when youre really about to die, it just feels so cold until you die.


    Carynne turned her head. She couldnt hold back the peal ofughter bubbling up inside her.


    The fief lord just raised his ss again. He didnt know whether he should smile or not.

 Chapter 53

    Chapter 53


    Have I died before?


    Yes.


    Mm I see. How?


    I think its because you got so upset from suffering under Mister Verdic.


    Carynne tried to trace her memories. The fief lord didnt die every time. There were times when he lived and stayed with Carynne until the day before <i>she</i> died. But in most cases, he didnt live.


    As the fief lord had been thoroughly beaten by Verdic, he often went in shock and became bedridden, and after a long bout of this illness, he would pass away.


    I think you had a hard time after the business failed.


    Carynne lowered her voice to a whisper. Fortunately, Verdic and Raymonds attention were on Ise instead of this side.


    I didnt think I would care about it so much.


    After his wife died, he considered everything else ephemeral. Be it thend or its people. Did he even feel any passion? The fief lord felt a bit disturbed.


    Carynneforted her father by patting him on the arm.


    Humans are more multifaceted than they think they are. But in the next life, Ill be sure to observe your death more closely, Father.


    T-Thank you.


    Its nothing.


    <i>Clink.</i>


    Over there, the countess was ridiculing Ise to her face. And sure enough, Ise was entirely flushed red. Whenever Ise was embarrassed, her movements grew stiffer and her voice would get louder, making her all the more difficult to deal with.


    Carynne looked fondly at her adorable rival. Meanwhile, Verdic couldnt bear to look and even covered his eyes with his hands.


    Verdics face looks funny.


    Ise over there looks interesting, too.


    One pair of father and daughter sipped their champagne as they watched another pair of father and daughter embarrass themselves. The fief lord set down his ss and got up from his seat. To this, Carynne asked.


    Where are you going?


    To do Mister Verdic a favor.


    Ugh.


    Carynne could feel a headacheing in as she thought of what shes about to go through as Isesdy-in-waiting. A lot of things happened this time, so she was getting even more peeved.


    I should have killed Ise first.


    Its alreadye to this though, so what could she do with regrets? Still, it was a good thing that Nancy, the person closest to Carynne, had died like that.


    Determined not to be bogged down by such trivial matters, Carynne smiled as she saw Ise approaching.


    Miss Ise.


    Carynne.


    Sit down and drink some brandy to calm you down.


    Thank you.


    Contrary to her courteous words however, Ise downed her alcohol with a murderous expression. Carynne thought that if the two of them were at the scene of a murder right now, fingers would be pointed to Ise as soon as people would see her face.


    Ise red at Lady Elva at the other side of the hall. The mistake shemitted against the countess was small, but not negligible. Rather than calling the countess Lady Elva, Ise had called her by herst nameLady Orphen.


    Uuugh


    Its Lady Elva, not Lady Orphen. You have to call her by her first name, not thest name. She is not only the wife of Count Orphen, but also the daughter of Baron Ronoix, you know.


    Wheres my mistake there though?


    Because calling her by her surname is like looking down on her.


    Yeah but why the hell!


    Keep your voice down, Ise. Lady Elva is the daughter of Baron Ronoix, but the barons noble peerage had been forfeited, but was reinstated more than a decade ago. Calling her Lady Orphen instead of Lady Elva is a lingering reminder of that disgraceful past.


    Okaaay? But what about that is disgraceful?


    See this, shes originally like that.


    While looking at Ises dumbstruck face, Carynne felt like crying.


    Yeah, okay. No need for you to think about anything. That Lady Elva over there borrowed money from Verdic Evans, and youre that mans daughter, so what could possibly be the problem here. You really dont have to think of anything, yes yes.


    Regardless of name, of reputation, of trifling etiquette and decorumits alright for you to disregard all of that, sure. Verdics money will cover all that disgrace, wont he? You dont have to worry about every little thing. Its all okay.


    That name harks back to the time before she became a Lady, when she was once amoner because her father was not an aristocrat at the time. When she made her debut, she entered high society as ady-in-waiting of Count Orphens mother. Whats worse was that she didnt even have the title of Lady back then. And even after she got married, she wasnt Lady Elva, but Lady Orphen. It was only after Baron Ronoix got reinstated that she became Lady Elva. Thats what you should pay special attention to.


    Ha


    But Carynne didnt tell the real situation behind it. Even if Ise made a mistake, any well-educated noblewoman wouldnt get angry towards someone whod make a mistake like that. When Carynne made this mistake a long time ago, she just smiled awkwardly, and in contemtion, herdy-in-waiting came over to tell her about it.


    Even if you make the same mistake, the cost to pay by the main character and by the supporting character is different.


    Carynne smiled.


    The countess anger was more focused towards Verdic. Carynne and Ises position here was different because Ise was bound to Verdics wealth. In other words, Ise was someone that the countess didnt want to be cordial with from the beginning.


    Arent you called Lady Carynne though?


    This was something that Carynne had already exined dozens of times before without fail. About sixty years ago, She got angry at Ise for not getting it even after having exined it many times, so Carynne got pped in the face for it.


    Her reaction was different this time, and she instead recited the lines one after another.


    My family is a fief owner, but we dont have a noble peerage. Though Im called Lady Hare, it is only as an esteemed daughter, not a Lady like with Lady Elva.


    Ise was bbergasted.


    You dont get to use the title of Lady like her either?


    Yes, even if Im from a fiefdom, Id have to be from the five upper nobility sses to use that title in the way that the Countess does. The Hare Fief once used to be an independent state, but after the upation, the fief is now under the Orphen County.


    Thats why its important to look good. Supposing that the story would go on.


    If I marry the son of a noble family, then Lady Hare Rather, Ill use thest name of my husband. The same goes for you, Ise. Once youre married, you wont be Lady Ise, but youll use Sir Raymondsst name instead, and youll be known as Lady Saytes.


    I prefer Lady Ise If not that, then Evans is better. What a pity.


    Suure


    A smile crossed Carynnes face.


    Why did you answer like that?


    Ises voice was sharp.


    No, you might not know it.


    Are you mocking me for not being a fief lords daughter like you?


    Dont exaggerate, Ise. Youre the only one who thinks that.


    But you smiled!


    As if you dont know, but am I not allowed to smile? If it made you feel bad, I apologize.


    Y-You


    Im sorry, Ise.


    Are you mocking me right now?


    Yes.


    As Ise was at a loss, Carynne thought that Ise was being quite adorable as she was showing a variety of expressions like this.


    Now that she thought about it, why didnt Verdic teach this to Ise? She wondered if this was because they were from a merchant ss. Most lessons on etiquette should have been given before ones debut in society. If theres someone out there whod want to speak ill of someone else, a minor mistake like this could blow out of proportion and be like high treason.


    Then the person who taught me It must have been Missus Deere, not Nancy.


    If this repeated life was true, then was it also true that this was a novel? How difficult. When rationality and insanity were so intertwined like this, truth, illusion, falsehood and hallucination were all mixed upit made her so dizzy.


    The biggest problem was that, thus far, she was enjoying her life as  Carynne  for so long only because she was under the faint presumption that she was an outsider of the novel. That she was not Carynne.


    Is there a way to prove it?


    Carynne frowned. She heard that Catherine said so, but Carynne wasnt sure because her mother also said that the world was like a novel. And beyond Carynne, Catherine might have been delusional herself, then she might have also fed that same delusion to her daughter.


    Carynne!


    Give me a sec.


    She didnt know which one of them was more pathetic, given that Carynne had already repeatedly exined the same thing to Ise about thirty times.


    Carynne felt grim as she recalled that she had to teach Ise about high society one by one as she was herdy-in-waiting. At the core of it, Ises personality made it so that she didnt take direction from others very well.


    Sure, shes good at crunching numbers, but when it came to etiquette and interpersonal rtionships, she knew almost zilch about those. She held no curiosity for it, neither interest as well.


    Its cause the parents ruined the child.


    What?


    Ah, the words left her lips. Carynne clicked her tongue at the words she uttered unconsciously.


    And at the iing palm she could already see, Carynne clenched her teeth.


    <i>SLAP!</i>


    <i> the conversation about Lady got a bit confusing in trantion, but to exin, here are the different titles used in Korean:</i>


    <i>  literally the English word Lady but in Korean romanization; this is the title used for the countess (as Lady Elva or Lady Orphen)</i>


    <i>  means esteemed daughter and is the title to politely call the youngdy of another family, so I also trante this word as Lady; this is the title used for Carynne (as Lady Carynne or Lady Hare)</i>


    <i>  also like  but somewhat less formal, so I trante it as Miss; this is the title used for Ise (as Miss Ise or Miss Evans) and sometimes for Carynne (Verdic called her Miss before)</i>


    <i>essentially, the hierarchy goes as: Miss () < Lady () < Lady ()</i>

 Chapter 54

    Chapter 54


    How How dare someone like you!


    Carynnes cheek was stinging. This life was truly difficult, gosh. Carynne sighed as she rubbed her cheek.


    I hold a higher post than you, Ise Evans.


    You Someone like you Whats so, good, about you?


    If it wasnt her social standing, then.


    My face?


    W-What?


    Ah, itd be best to hold it in. However, Carynne was actually annoyed at Ise this time because she interrupted her train of thought with such a trivial matter.


    Its not good to be so loud like this, Miss Ise. Are you trying to stain your fathers reputation?


    This beggar-like


    Stop it now, Ise.


    Raymond caught Ises hand.


    How dare that, that girl say such!


    Ise Evans.


    Raymonds tone of voice was icy.


    Please be rational.


    The resounding <i>ck</i> that was brought on by Ises energetic hand was so loud that most of the people inside the hall looked this way, all astonished and curious. Carynne wondered if its a praiseworthy thing to have this kind of talenta clownish temperament that did not fail to draw everyones attention with just a single gesture.


    Its alright.


    Because its so fun.


    Ise cried out.


    Lord Raymond!


    Carynne smiled at Ise, who didnt even care when Carynne said that she was fine.


    Its alright, Miss Ise.


    Ise, again, didnt listen and instead leaned on Raymond as she cried. Even so, what a pity that no tears came out. At the very least, Ise copsed with the apanying sound of wailing.


    Raymond awkwardly caught her.


    I feel so wronged, Lord Raymond!


    Miss Ise Evans. Theres a lot of eyes on you right now, so it wouldnt be good to cry like this.


    Raymond handed her a handkerchief.


    With a grim expression, Verdic strode up to them. He acknowledged Raymond and Carynne with a nod, then grabbed his daughter by the shoulder.


    I apologize, Miss Hare, Sir Raymond.


    Its alright, Mister Verdic.


    Verdic towed Ise out. She continued to cling to Raymond, but Verdic was stronger than her. While fighting back, she kept crying with only her mouth, but she eventually let go.


    There they go.


    Seems like it.


    As Verdic and Ise lumbered away, Raymond nced over at Carynne and <i>ck, ck,</i> he pped his hands together.


    You were incredible.


    Watch your fiance better.


    Carynne grumbled at Raymond.


    Her personality is something she acts on by herself. Why are you asking me to supervise her?


    Thats right, too. But you know, while you were looking at me earlier, Sir Raymond, if only you hadnt missed the chance to stop Ise at that moment, then I wouldnt have gotten pped.


    Of course he wouldnt. But even if he knew this, so what? Then it would be just like that. Its an insignificant matter anyway. The important thing here was that Carynne got hit by Ise. And Raymond disliked that fact.


    Raymond wavered for a moment, but he soon bowed his head.


    I apologize, Miss Carynne Hare.


    And Carynne was annoyed by how he would draw near her like this.


    Please stop meddling in my business from now on. Its already hard enough for me.


    So donte any closer. I dont need you in this life.


    As she looked forward to unveiling the truth through one more corpse, Carynne turned her back on Raymond.


    And Raymond did note after her.


    * * *


    In the dead of the night, Carynne was building a mountain. She took out practically all the books in the study.


    Itd be nice to find something special, like Mothers diary.


    How did she live her life? How did she escape the shackles of her life? Carynne was terribly curious.


    The fief lords study, which was like a personal library, had only one door leading from the hallway, but the expansive space within was divided. Carynne used thedder inside the study so that she could go through more reference materials. The smell of the old books entered her senses.


    How could people of the olden times put up with quills?


    As she flipped through the writings of the past century, Carynne searched for a more personal record.


    <i>Creeeak.</i>


    Didnt Mother leave behind a diary or something?


    The fief lord entered the study right then, looking haggard. He had to stay behind at the dining hall muchter than Carynne. She gestured to Tom, wordlessly telling him to close the door.


    I dont know.


    Did you really love her?


    Carynne looked away. She didnt know what kind of face she had if she were to look at the fief lord.


    But, sure enough, that wasnt much help.


    Father, you said that you believed Mother, but it seems like you dont even know much about her.


    Even if I dont, I loved her very much.


    In the fief lords hands was a long piece of rope, and he was tying it into a noose.


    Would you like some help? Ive done it a few times, so Im confident in my skills.


    Carynne offered as she recalled her suicide attempts from the past. However, the fief lord only continued to tie the knot tightly by himself, then he looked at his daughter.


    No need. There should be no indication that someone else tied it.


    Ah.


    Though it didnt really matter whether shed be implicated with a crime or not. Carynne wondered if she should be impressed by the care he was disying here.


    But you went too far with what you said at dinner earlier, you know, Carynne noted. Its like youre advertising that youre about to kill yourself.


    She was referring to how the fief lord basically asked Verdic and Lady Elva to take care of Carynne. She wanted to go to the capital, but he wasnt feeling well, so he would like to ask them a favorthis was what he said. Verdic grudgingly said yes, and Lady Elva dly became witness of this.


    Wouldnt that be better though?


    I guess so.


    Right.


    Well then Um Should I go out?


    Yes.


    Carynne went out along with Tom, then she rested one ear onto the door to listen in.


    Hey Tom.


    The boy looked up.


    Maybe your wish wille true. If I lose my father and fall victim to adversity on top of being an orphan, wouldnt that be considered revenge for you?


    Tom opened his mouth, but no words came out. Carynne stopped trying to read his mind through his facial expressions.


    If not that.


    Then, Carynne waited.


    For that rattling sound.


    For a while now.


    Even as the angle of the moonlight had changed, there was still no indication of that sound.


    Perhaps.


    <i>Creak.</i>


    She opened the door. There, the fief lord was seen to be shedding tears as the noose was tied around his neck. However, his feet were still on the chair.


    Ah.


    So its like that.


    Youre scared, arent you?


    No, no Im not.


    But thats not what his face was saying.


    Youre afraid of dying.


    Carynne walked closer to the fief lord. She understood him well enough. Even when shes already used to it, she still dreaded that same feeling when its close the anticipation of pain, the surging despair, the final thought.


    Shed think, what if this was really the end?


    As her breathing stopped, shede to the conclusion that all the value and meaning that she had built during her lifetime was meaningless. That she was nothing but a pebble on the side of the street. That, even if she did not exist, the world would continue to turn, and after a million years, just one person was worth nothing at all. As though she was ovee by a huge wave, shed be crushed by this fear.


    However, Carynne conquered that fear.


    If you were to die a hundred times over, then youd be forced to ovee it. Youd have no other choice but to ept it.


    Right now, what Carynne feared during the moments before her imminent end was not the fear of death. It was the fear of life. It was a fear that would invade her senses until her final breath.


    If shed live again this time, what would she do.


    So, she was feeling lonely. After all, the fief lord would never be able to understand her. The only person who could have sympathized with her had already died long ago. She did not even have one single memory of her. Carynne couldnt remember Catherine.


    Its alright.


    And yet, even when the fief lord couldnt understand her, Carynne could understand the fief lord. He didnt know, but she remembered. She could remember that frightening past.


    Its been such a long time, but she still remembered.


    Her first death. That fear.


    Haa


    Thats why she could understand what the fief lord was feeling as he shed those tearsit was that sense of shame.


    Although faced with despair so painful that it felt like the entire world was copsing, even greater was the pain of the longing for life.


    Besides grieving over lifes separation, there would be the undeniable sense of not wanting to die.


    Instinctive fear and denial.

 Chapter 55

    Chapter 55


    I-I just


    He hadpletely lost himself in the indulgence of unconditional love. And as he weighed that love on the scale, the result was the destruction of oneself. He made it so that his childs mind was empty, and even when she had gone ahead to murder people, he rationalized his actions in ordance with this with love.


    The love for his child, the love for his wifebecause he loved both of them. However, this love eventually did not weigh more than his own life. One might say that this was inconsequential, but that was not the case for the fief lord. Catherines love was not the only thing that mattered. The fief lord despaired at the fact that the love he felt weighed less than his own life.


    Its alright. I understand.


    Even so, another emotion stood above that understanding. It was the feeling of inevitability.


    Haha


    Carynne let out a dispiritedugh. Haha, look at this, Mother. Your love. Look at your male lead. Hes crying because hes scared witless.


    Then thats the limit of both your love and belief. Ah, Im not using you. Father, this is how everyone is. You see your own death in the way that other people would. Theres no such thing as love that transcends death. So thats not the answer either. It must be something else. Because its not you, Father! That much love is fine. That much belief is alright. Sure enough, Ill find the answer. But your guess was wrong. Ha, something like eternal love that can ovee it all, goodness.


    I-I Im


    The fief lords expression was a disaster. Carynne spoke bitterly.


    I dont need it. Father, its alright. Im not denying your love.


    Carynne grinned.


    If its possible to ovee this with ordinary love, then shouldnt there be a different solution out there, something else other than an ambiguous emotion?


    She wanted tofort the fief lord. She did so very sincerely.


    Its alright, Father. It truly is!


    Carynne smiled broadly as she said this. And sheughed oh so delightfully.


    Im not such an immoral person that I desperately want to see my fathers corpse. Ah, isnt that right? Anyway, its like that. It doesnt matter, just like that. You chose your life!


    <i>p!</i>


    Then, she pped her hands together.


    Life is great! No amount of hatred, love or power means anything in the face of death! And among them all, even love! Yes, Father. So you chose life! If you stopped breathing with just one word of mine, then that kind of life would be an act of sphemy! Yes!


    Carynne pped andughed. Oh what joy!


    Im being serious, if you had died, Father, then Id have made Sir Raymond take some drugs and hypnotize him into falling in love with me. Mm, uh-huh. I just wanted to see how far I could go. But we dont have to go to that point.


    Unlike Carynne, who became morefortable now, the fief lord was feeling miserable.


    I Catherine


    Fufu, Im d. Seriously Its terrible to know that the one hundred years I spent is connected to such a fleeting emotion. But Im so happy, Father!


    Carynne stepped closer to her father.


    He was trembling. He brought his neck to the noose, but he couldnt kick the chair beneath his feet. Before this, he hid some corpses, killed people, brainwashed her daughter and gave her drugsall in the name of love. He was blind to that extent.


    I


    The fief lord believed his wife, and so too did he believe his daughter. He did. He believed them. Thats what he thought. His wife was from another world, and so was his daughter. They repeated their lives until theyd find their true love. Catherine fell in love with him and was released from the spell, and Carynne had yet to find her true love, and so she was doing all sorts of things.


    <i>My dear.</i>


    He recalled Catherines final words.


    <i>You dont believe me, do you? You also think that its absurd.</i>


    Its not like that, Catherine. My wife, my dearly beloved. My goddess. I believe everything that you say, everything that is about you. I am your god, just as you are my goddess. Even more so, how could I not believe your final oracle.


    <i>Then please, believe in Carynne. That child, too, will find love in the end. No matter how she behaves, trust her.</i>


    Catherines entire body was wracked with a disease that couldnt be named. She faded, as though her existence refused to be tethered to this world. Her body was thin enough that her bones stuck out, and the once milk-like skin had turned ashen, close to the color gray. The fief lord rushed about every which way, but Catherine took everything in stride.


    <i>Finally, death wees me.</i>


    He clung to his wife, who said that death was her old friend, but it was all meaningless. Even if the period in which their love blossomed, time could not be turned back. The fief lord was not Catherine. Even when he believed her, even when he loved her, the time Catherine had was not the time he had. Catherineforted him, saying she had gone back in time so shes been with him for a very, very long while nowthat, even when death came to embrace her, she was no longer afraid.


    <i>I hope that Nancys medicine will help her.</i>


    <i>Ill give you as much medicine as you need.</i>


    <i>Dont give me any more. It doesnt even taste good.</i>


    Catherine chuckled. Evenughter had be difficult for her. As she coughed, blood also came out.


    <i>Do you believe me?</i>


    <i>Yes.</i>


    You dont believe me.


    Carynneughed.


    That makes me happy.


    * * *


    Verdic dragged Ise roughly into an empty room, and here, Ise shoved off Verdics hand.


    Have you gone mad?


    Im not going to let something like that go.


    Ise gnashed her teeth in anger.


    Ill crush that face of hers. Im going to cut her hair first, pour tar all over her head, and then her face


    Verdic gaped in bewilderment. Did this child lose all rationality over her jealousy? As his daughter muttered and said harsh things, he berated her.


    Are you out of your mind? What kind of disgrace did you just show Lady Elva? Huuh? Even if she owes us money, shes a countess for Christs sake! And that girl is not your maid! I cant believe you pped Catherine Hare during dinner!


    Father, you call her Lady Elva, too.


    What?


    If you knew about it, why didnt you tell me? What kind of father are you that you didnt tell me? Right then just a while ago, I, do you know just how much Carynne humiliated me?


    Verdic was hitting his chest out of frustration. He couldnt believe how jealous and angry his daughter was right now that she wasnt even thinking of what kind of mistake she had madeand over a trivial matter.


    Do you not understand what just happened? Do you not realize how you must have behaved in front of those nobles?!


    He yelled at his daughter. In her indignation, Ise retorted back angrily.


    Then shouldnt you have been born as a great noble?! Father, do you know just how much Ive been humiliated just because youre not a noble?


    Ise!


    Ovee by fury, Verdic eventually raised his hand. Ise cowered for a moment, but she soon recovered her rage as she answered back.


    Go ahead, hit me! In the end, youre just an upstart who has a bit of money!


    <i>Crash!</i>


    AHHH!


    Verdic picked up the pot next to him and threw it at her feet. Then, as he ignored how frightened his daughter was, he took a step over the broken pieces of the pot, taking in a deep breath.


    I will not hit you Your engagement is just around the corner, keep that in mind.


    Feeling too much anger could also render someone calm. Verdics mind right now seemed to have turnedpletely white with rage. However,pared to his fury, the words he spoke now sounded normal.


    Keep in mind just how many contracts and people are involved in your marriage. If you throw any more tantrums, know thisI will punish you in a way that will not leave any traces.


    Hic


    Go to your room this instant. And apologize properly to Miss Carynne Hare and Countess Elva!


    Ise sobbed out of anger and frustration, but when she realized that Verdic was truly mad at her, she no longer spoke up. As much as he indulged his daughter with material things, he also demanded that she move as he wanted. It was like that now, and it was like that in the past as well.


    Ise trudged out into the hallway. She just wanted to leave this mansion already.


    Its cold.


    She walked down the hallway with her arms crossed over her torso. It was so cold here. Even though it was summer, the frigid air permeated through her entire body.


    I wanna go home.


    The thought crossed her mind that this mansion didnt suit her. Its cold, its hard. Only strange things happened in this ce. She wanted to go back to the warmth of her own home. She once thought that this ce was refined, but that was only an illusion. Her father believed that this mansion had history, but for Ise, its nothing but a tacky, unpleasant ce.


    Apology? Whos apologizing to whom!


    Ises expression was stained with deep-seated resentment and irritation as she recalled Carynnes words a while ago. She pretended to be polite and gentle, but evidently, she was never that kind of person on the inside.


    <i>Its cause the parents ruined the child.</i>


    How dare


    How dare a girl like you! Ise promised herself that she would pour tar on Carynnes hair. Although she was a little shocked by how violent her own imagination was, in her mind, Ise had already mutted Carynne in more ways than one. As she did this, she felt a little better.


    Does that satisfy you?


    No.


    Huh?


    With how casually the answer came back, Ise knew that the distant voice was Carynnes. Ise had arrived in front of the fief lords voice. It was a room that didnt interest her, but hearing Carynnes voice inside lured her in.


    Do I open the door, do I not.


    Was that girl being scolded by her father, too? Or perhaps Ise could feel her pounding heart. As her curiosity was provoked all kinds of dark suspicions blossomed. A dead maid. A missing corpse. Hallucinations. A dreary priest. A woman addicted to drugs.


    <i>Creeeeak</i>


    The door opened quietly. And.


    AAh?


    A dead body was hanging on a noose.


    And Carynne was staring at that dead body.


    Then, with those same eyes, she looked straight at Ise.

 Chapter 56

    Chapter 56


    Looking at the fief lords sobbing face caused a subtle but strange stir within her. It wasnt a newfound surge of affection. Rather, it was a hint of unpleasantness and a dash of joy at seeing another person at their worst. And there was also a sigh of relief, as though saying, ah, you also cant do anything.


    Carynne felt a little reassured about the fact that his supposition that love was the condition, that love was the answer, that absolute belief was the answer, was ultimately wrong just as she thought. Even so, there was a faint bitter taste lingering in her mouth that couldnt be removed by that reassurance.


    What are you crying about? Smile, Father.


    Carynne smiled instead of him. Are you sad? Are you frustrated with yourself? But you have to smile. Im smiling, too, see. And then youll have to smile in front of my predecessor who already went ahead to the next frontier. This is the extent of loves answer, just as Mother said.


    Father, you dont believe Mother. You just used Mother as an excuse. If you really believed her, you wouldnt have hesitated. You know, seriously, if you believed even a word of it, then why have you not died? Theres no reason for you <i>not</i> to die, right? Isnt this world without your love all ck and white already? Isnt it all meaningless?


    Right? Isnt that how love is supposed to be? If not, then its just so unfair.


    At the very least, if I, if Mother, if even many more women out there are meant to feel love to the extent of dying for it, then shouldnt it be reciprocated by that much? Shouldnt you love her that much, too?


    Catherine I


    He could no longer say the words I love you.


    Thats what I thought.


    Carynne touched his hand lightly and closed her eyes.


    You said its unconditional, that kind of emotion. Mmh. Alright. Ill tell you what I think. Father, Father, listen to me.


    She twirled around in a dance and gently pointed at the portrait.


    First of all, I would like to express my thanks to both Father and Mother for giving me hope. Thank you. Mother also went through this strange phenomenon of dying anding back to life in the same novel, but she solved it in the end. Ive been given hope. Wonderful. How promising.


    Then, she continued.


    It seems like I dont need any love.


    Even with a frowning face, its possible to smile.


    The fief lord still had that noose around his neck. He continued to clutch onto the rope with trembling hands. Carynne sighed and then told him.


    If you cant even kill yourself, juste down from there. Your neck must hurt.


    NNo, no. I believe.


    The fief lord answered urgently. However, in the end, he still couldnt kick the chair from under him. Carynne just frowned and sighed, then she went on.


    Its toote.


    Its not not, toote.


    It is. The very moment you hesitated, its already toote for you, Father.


    If you want to die so badly, then Ill help you.


    Carynne gritted her teeth, then answered.


    Even if you hang yourself now in a hurry, that doesnt absolve your hesitation. Youve given your answer. At the very least, thats your love, sure. Its not so grandiose.


    Carynne walked over to the trembling fief lords side and patted him as though tofort him. She wanted to give him a pat on the shoulder, but he was too high up, so she patted his leg instead. The fief lord reacted by clutching the rope even tighter, but despite his renewed attempt, he still couldnt hang himself.


    Father.


    If you really did hang yourself here, what did you think Ill do after?


    She waited for him to answer only for a quick moment as she answered her own question immediately.


    The first thing Ill have done was to look for the drugs.


    Then I also thought that I should learn about hypnosis from Nancyter.


    There was no answer.


    Carynne didnt care about it anyhow.


    If a measure of emotion is the answer, then I wonder just how much there should be. Shouldnt my male lead die just as many times as I have? Or at least maybe someone whod dly kill himself. That way, at least


    Carynne blew at the candle on the fief lords desk.


    And the me went out.


    At least it would be the same worth.


    She took the silver candbra. It was heavy and sharp. She read about a simr scenario in a novel that she had read before. No, has she read it yet? Carynne tilted her head to the side and grappled with her memories, but she remained confused. Ah, well, whatever. Strike. Or stab. Whichever it was, as long as this much would let her kill another.


    If rolling around in bed can be called physical love, and if saints can provide aid to the needy with their mercy and kindness and call that love as well, what kind of worth does a married couples love have? Ive never experienced being married that long, so Im curious. Fufu, if you had killed yourself, Father, then this was what Id have done apud your true love, drug my male lead, brainwash him and make him look only at me. And while I speak only the truth and nothing but the truth, Ill make it so that my words are considered as Gods revtion. Just like you, Father, as you becameplicit in murder just because you heeded Mothers words, if Raymond will believe me and start a rebellion for me, then that just might be fun, too. If something like that happens, then I think Ill be alright in this life. After all, Ive decided to kill for my own pleasure.


    His face had already turned gray.


    Father, you dont want to die, right?


    I dont.


    The fief lord looked as though he couldnt bear just how much he despised himself. Looking up at the fief lords face, Carynne suggested something.


    Let me help you.


    And with that, her words sounded like salvation to him. Even when the fief lord couldnt take his own life, he didnt want to reject the hand outstretched to himthe hand of Carynne, who had the same face as Catherine.


    Humans wereplex, just as they were unfathomable.


    Finding it funny how his face now showed a bit of satisfaction, Carynneughed at the fief lord. He didnt have the courage to kill himself in the end, but he had enough gall to make his daughtermit patricide.


    But before that, there are some other things Im curious about. Before you and Mother started seeing each other, did you ever meet the other men who were courting Mother? Or by chance, has she left something like a peculiar memento?


    I


    <i>tter!</i>


    At that moment, the fief lords eyes bugged out. His legs were shaking. His face was distorted. His groans rang out in the room, but that sound, too, did notst long. Tom was faster than Carynne. Its certain that he had just been biding his time until he could rush in. The moment Carynne raised the silver candbra and turned to face him, the boy ran away.


    Keugh


    Tom had been standing by the door, but he ran forward quickly and pulled the fief lords leg. Even when he was being kicked, Tom used his entire body to hang on and pull down. The tform where the fief lord had been standing was pushed out, and in the struggle, the noose properly caught his throat and strangled himpletely. Its faster than youd thinkto run out of breath.


    Then, he stopped moving.


    Hes dead.


    But more importantly.


    Why?


    Carynne was entirely disconcerted. Why? Just why the hell? So flustered now, why the hell are you here?


    What just happened?


    The act of murder had been done in a blink of an eye that she couldnt believe it happened.


    At that very moment, Carynne really couldnt think of anything at all.


    For something that never once happened before, for something that she couldnt have foreseen, it was too big of a shock that she couldnt properly feel entertained.


    What just happened.


    Carynne btedly picked up the silver candbra, but her father was already dead. Stabbing him here would be nothing but an act of scratching on a lump of meat. Carynne blinked. What was it that she felt. Emptiness? Anger? She didnt know.


    She ruminated.


    Tom!


    Yet she couldnt figure it out.


    Why did it turn out like this?


    It happened in an instant.


    Tom killed the fief lord.

 Chapter 57

    Chapter 57


    What the hell.


    Carynne stared at Toms face once more.


    Tom also stared back at Carynne. Tom wasnt angry, nor was he delighted. He showed an appearance that was different from the bold action he disyed just now.


    The moment Carynne saw that expression, she became discouraged. Why? Why are you making that face? Then why did you do <i>that?</i>


    I, dont


    <i>understand.</i>


    Carynne couldntprehend what just transpired.


    Um, uh, yeah. I dont get it. Youre not the main character and I really dont get it. You, I mean, Tom shouldnt have done something like this here. Up until now, its just, Ive showered you with my favor, Ive given you my admiration, you were the steppingstone to my love.


    Out of disgust for herself, Carynne shut herself up.


    Right.


    At the end of the day, Carynne did not consider Tom to be important. Wasnt she just acting under the impression of how she thought a main character in a novel would do, thats why she saved Tom?


    Isnt that okay?


    His disgustingly extreme obsession with life. As soon as she saw how he burned his own mouth, Carynne had a hunch.


    This time again, for his sins, Tom would die. And because this was a usible conclusion Carynne was also convinced.


    Carynne was prepared to take her own life.


    Im not only determined


    She was looking forward to it.


    Wouldnt this read as a good progression, too? A clich plot. A story about good and evil. A story filled with revenge for the sake of ones parents. The story of killing the crazy killer and finally achieving happiness.


    Painstakingly living a life thats full of threats and mockery, the boymitted one evil deed that would lead to him being gradually healthy But just one year was too short though. If the story was longer, would another viin appear in the future?


    Carynne wondered.


    If you were going to kill someone, I thought itd be me.


    Due to his severed tongue, he could only groan and make noises, but this was enough for the boy to express his anger. Tom used his entire body to show his rage. As Tom had watched all of Carynnes evildoings, he came to know her. He picked up on her madness and her belief.


    You figured out how to screw me over.


    Carynne turned her gaze from Tom and to her fathers corpse. The once-handsome mans face was grotesquely distorted. He must have prepared himself for his own death a lot, but he did not prepare for this kind of demise.


    With this, are you satisfied?


    She was curious. Was he satisfied with this?


    Carynnes past experiences were, in the end, extremely limited. Carynne looked back on Tom as he was in the past. Tom was a street rat whose father was a rapist. As she had the role of the female lead, Carynne fostered Tom. The boy did die eventually, but his death was written with such detail in the novel.


    Is it fine to use this kind of plot device? Are you aiming for the modifier of a side characters revolt, something like that? You prefer that kind of progression? Tom. Thomas. Tell me. What do you think? This, what you just did, is it a traitorous act of the rebellious side character in the  story ?


    But there was no answer. Tom was a mute. Because he sacrificed his own voice for the sake of his life. And at this very moment, Toms silence was his revenge against Carynne.


    Tell me


    Still, Tom refused to answer, didnt even nod or react or anything.


    Then, he stared straight into Carynnes eyes and lifted the corners of his lips.


    <i>Haha.</i> Carynne let out a despondentugh.


    It felt like she had been punched across the face. Carynne could think of no other analogy to what she was feeling right now.


    This life isnt going as Im expecting it to.


    Carynne had hoped to change her character.


    So, to understand the story entirely, she would also have to try and understand that boy who looked at her with such fear in his eyes yet killed the fief lord like that. If she could do that, then shed be able to relieve this heaviness that was pressing down on her stomach.


    But honestly, it doesnt matter.


    !


    Right then, she felt a presence.


    Shit.


    Carynne noticed that when Tom ran out, he left the door open. Hes screwing with her through and through.


    She narrowed her eyes at the open door.


    There, she saw a head of washed-out blonde hair. There was just one person who had that hair color inside this whole mansion. At this, Carynne sighed and approached the door, thinking that it was perhaps fortunate that it was just Ise.


    This scenario had happened time and time again. This was the first time that the fief lords death was Toms doing, but its not the first time that the fief lord died. Furthermore, its not the first time that Ise was a witness to the fief lords death.


    This was still written in the story. This was manageable. This was a story thats still within the bounds of her control.


    Carynne walked towards the door.


    She would have to work yet again. Carynne visualized in her mind a normal expression. A face that would be suitable for this scene. Dontugh. Dont get angry.


    She took one more step.


    Now, she had the face of a shocked daughter who had seen her fathers death. She made her hair messy. She rubbed around her eyes to smudge her makeup. Tears naturally trickled down her cheeks.


    One more step.


    To Ise, Carynne recited the usual lines of dialogue.


    I-Ise What do I do? My father, m-my father


    Then, thest step led her to the threshold.


    Carynne swung the door wider, and there stood Ise. Carynnes tears trickled down profusely. And Ise


    Ah.


    One sigh was enough.


    With that sigh,


    Carynne realized that Ise did not believe her.


    And Ise, too, realized that Carynne had noticed this.


    * * *


    Sighing, Verdic took out his pipe from his coat pocket. He filled and lit it. Smoke rose up while his mood dampened.


    Its so hard to raise a daughter.


    He would have had an easier time if he had a daughter as well-mannered as Carynne Hare. Verdic wholeheartedly loved Ise, but her behavior tonight was a step too far.


    Damn it.


    It was through his daughter and Raymonds marriage that hed receive the diamond mining rights to the Hion Mine, guaranteed. Just thinking about the numerous contracts and schedules that his daughter had just stepped on was already giving him a headache. The alreadyplicated transaction had gotten even more twisted up.


    No, wasnt it already screwed? The countess would try to dig into any of Verdics shorings here. In the first ce, wasnt she already being nice to Carynne Hare even as they were not acquainted nor affiliated? Verdic felt wretched about the fact that Ise had pped Carynne right in front of the countess.


    Why be so preupied with so many useless things. That little girl should know when she should take a step back. In that ce even


    After his anger subsided, it was bitterness that settled in. He wanted to give Ise only good things. Ise would ask why she wasnt given her own share andined, but truthfully, Verdic didnt want to give her that. Ise didnt have any semnce of moderation.


    Was this perhaps the privilege of a daughter? Dirty work and violence was a mans business. Ise didnt need to dip her toes into that.


    Verdic believed this and had no doubt about it.


    A woman would just have to wear fine clothes, listen to music, admire handsome men, cry, and raise her own children once the time came.


    How the hell did Selena raise Ise.


    ming his wife, Verdic lowered his pipe. He and his wife had, one way or another, managed to live together well enough for many years. She gave birth evenly to one son and one daughter and overlooked her husbands mistresses. She was always known as a wise wife.


    But Ise was different. She was prone to jealousy and sheined a lot. Just who the hell did Ise take after?


    Haa.


    Verdic closed his eyes and pressed down on his throbbing forehead. nning to buy a new woman as soon as he got back, he locked the windows and doors, then closed his eyes once more.


    * * *


    Ise desperately forced herself to think. What now. What should I do. I got caught. I got <i>caught.</i>


    Ise.


    C-Carynne. The ffief lord has p-passed away


    Express your regrets. Think that shes a poor girl. Come on, think that shes a poor thing. If I dont think that from the bottom of my heart, then Ill be caught!


    O-Oh, Carynne Its such a terrible thing.


    This cant be. My voice is shaking.


    Ise tried to force her face to turn up into a smile, but her body wouldnt move as she wanted.


    Carynne instead was the one who smiled at her. Her smile was so natural. Carynne responded.


    Whats this, Miss Ise.


    W-What?


    You sly fox, you.


    Carynne did not hesitate. The silver candbra that she had hidden behind her thick sleeve was pulled out, aimed precisely at Ises temple.


    AHHHH!


    Since when have you been watching?


    With a wry smile, Carynne drew closer.


    Shh Youre too loud.


    AHH! AAAAHHH! AAAAAAAHHHH!


    I said youre too loud.


    Carynnes white teeth shone in the dark. A detestably disgusting peal ofughter rang out. Thatughter sounded like the noise that a flipped over insect would make. Beneath that girls beautiful appearance, insanity wriggled out.


    Ise needed to back away. She managed to avoid a hit to a vital point at that moment because of her skittishness. It was due to that nervous energy that she couldnt act properly, but it was also because of this that her life was spared. Ise immediately ran away.


    Help! Anyone! AAHH!


    Carynne ran after Ise.


    Ise! Just a moment!


    AHHHHH!


    Ise disappeared in an instant.


    Itll only take a moment though


    Itll be done in a quick second. Ha, what a waste. All this in the middle of the night, and for what.

 Chapter 58

    Chapter 58


    She didnt think that shed lose her. Carynne clicked her tongue. Shes still not used to this.


    Fortunately for Carynne, however, Ise ran straight towards the north corridor, which wasnt often used by people. Then at the end was a staircase. Carynne pictured the manors interioryout in her mind.


    Gotta double back.


    Even if there werent many people in this ce, its only a matter of time before people woulde here since Ise had screamed like that. For now, Carynne should lure her to a spot that was less likely to be passed through by other people.


    Carynne gripped the candbra and ran after Ise.


    Murderer! Murderer! AAAAHHHHH!


    Miss Ise! Im serious Please wait, I have something to say! Miss Ise!


    Moderate terror was present.


    She didnt really have to run so hard, and instead she could just take it easy. Still though, shed have to scare Ise just a little bit so that shed go where she needed to go. Then, Carynne would wait for her there.


    Carynne was aware of the unconsciously wide grin on her lips. This smile was much more naturalpared to the one she gave the fief lord earlier. There were many things that delighted her in this life. And when she saw Ises bloodstains, shemented about it for a moment. She pitied the girl, so shed have to kill her all at once.


    Miss Ise Youre bleeding so much.


    Blood trickled down in the wake of Ises each and every step. These were the traces of Carynnes prey.


    How many times would she need to stab, hit or strangle her?


    Ise Evans. You know The sins of the parents are inherited by the child. Ill confess, then. To be honest, I lied back then. I agree with what you said. You didnt kill me, but Mister Verdic killed me several times. Thats why. I really want to watch Mister Verdic die. But you know, I thought of something more interesting than poisoning him. Wouldnt Mister Verdic suffer a lot if <i>you</i> died? Thats why, the parent can atone for his sins through his child. Mm Does that sound right? Maybe its not. Honestly, I just blurted out the first thing on my mind. Haha. Can you hear me, Ise?


    For some reason, she was excited.


    Carynne swung the candbra. She liked feeling its weight. Was she experiencing the pleasure of hunting? Hunting was a mans entertainment. During any hunt, Carynne always just stayed back, preparing some meals, cheering when Raymond brought back a fox.


    This was a lot more fun than just that. She vowed that next time, shed try wielding a bigger gun at the hunting grounds. Carynne felt that its a shame how the only gun she could handle was a pistol. Maybe itd be fun to shoot something from far, far away using a scope. Thats what Raymond was good at.


    The hobby of hunting is quite exciting as well, Ise.


    Even if she didnt die, this was still a situation wherein she didnt know whether shed die by Carynnes hand or not.


    The match of a lifetime? Ah, how very fun. As expected, this was a much simpler form of entertainmentpared to teetering between fantasy or reality. This was a good choice. Maybe itd be a good idea to kill again in the next life?


    Ah I shouldnt get addicted. Goodness me.


    The urgent beating of her heart filled her pleasantly. Carynne took off her heeled shoes to hide the sound of her footsteps.


    Although she tried hunting a few times before, she felt no affinity with the animals. But what about people? The pounding of her heart made her want to let out a peal ofughter. To the extent that she wished to hum as well.


    * * *


    <i>Huuk huuk, huuk.</i>


    Ise thought that she ran for such a long time already, but the hallway was seemingly endless.


    Where am I? This ce is a mansion. How do I get out? Dont know. The stairs. I have to go back to the stairs. I dont know the mansionsyout. I need to get out of here right now.


    But after Ise ran down the staircase, which was at the end of the corridor, she had no choice but to curse out.


    Damn it!


    Ise came running down, but when she reached the end at the ground floor, she found that it was locked.


    <i>Ise</i>


    She could hear footsteps from a distance. It must be Carynne. Strangely enough, Ise didnt encounter anybody else even though she was screaming as she ran away. There should have been maids and attendants here though.


    I took the wrong turn


    She went to an unused hallway. She wasnt familiar with this old mansion, so she didnt even know where she should or should not run. Was this ce really this big?


    Ise covered her face and clenched her teeth. The sound of those footsteps drew nearer.


    In the end, she had to run to the other hallway.


    I knew it I knew it was her.


    When Ise saw her face, she knew.


    Carynne killed the fief lord.


    Even if she hadnt seen the murder happen with her own eyes, Ise realized it at that moment. Carynne was responsible for everything. She didnt see people as people. She deceived people with that beautiful face and gentle demeanor just to stick a knife to their neck.


    Shes sure that Carynne was also the one who killed that maid.


    <i>Huuk, huuk huuk.</i>


    Ise ran.


    Even if her lunacy was stripped from her, and in spite of how terrifying she was, Carynne was only just a seventeen-year-old girl. And she didnt have a gun with her. All she had was a silver candbra.


    Whatever strength Carynne had in her, theres no way it could match that of a monster or a man. She even looked frailer than Ise. Shes so thin.


    Ill make sure you rot in prison.


    Ise vowed to herself. No, shed make sure that Carynne would be executed. Thinking about this, she giggled. Ise could even be a hero. Carynne was a murderer who killed her own father, and might have also killed a few more people. After catching that girl, Raymond would surely bow in admiration for Ise and regret his previous actions.


    Huu.


    But before then, she needed to live.


    Looking around, Ise pushed the first door she saw in front of her.


    Damn.


    Its locked. Was it locked because this was an unused hallway? She pushed her tongue up and held her breath. Fortunately, Carynne moved slower than Ise did, and she couldnt hear the other girls footsteps any longer.


    Ta-da.


    Huh?


    Someone ced a hand on her shoulder. As Ise held her breath, she heardughter intertwined with the whisper that flowed into her ears.


    How could I lose you inside my own house?


    Like a nightmare, Carynneughed.


    AAh, AHHH!


    Ise shook off Carynnes grip on her shoulder and stomped on Carynnes foot with all her strength. <i>Crunch. </i>When she heard the ghastly sound, Ise cheered inwardly.


    Your acting skills are no joke.


    Even as her foot bled out, Carynne smiled. As if she felt no pain at all. And then, she approached Ise once more.


    Ah, AAAHHH!


    Entirely creeped out, Ise screamed at the top of her lungs. That girl was a monster.


    Carynne stepped closer and grinned. As though she was in the garden, or in the music room. She looked like a well-educated youngdy, but her foot continued to bleed and walked with that candbra in one hand.


    With a bright smile on her face, Carynne spoke.


    Ise The two of us. Shall we be friends in the next life?


    What?


    Ise couldnt have ever expected these words toe out from her lips, and they made her even more confused in the situation at present.


    Truly as expected, hearing screams is such a wonderful thing.


    And there was only one thing Ise could say in return.


    Lunatic.


    She shot out the remark and immediately ran away. If her life wasnt in danger right now, she would have even given her the finger.


    Thats too bad But maybe we can be friends next time. You


    Leave me alone!


    Carynne expressed her disappointment as she shrugged, yet she continued to pursue Ise from afar. Just watching her walk like that, one foot dragging behind, was such a gruesome thing to see. Ise gritted her teeth.


    So, they once again continued the chase at that dark hallway.


    <i>Haa, haa, haa.</i>


    She was out of breath. Her heart was beating like crazy. Her body wasnt all that fit either. Ise cursed this endless hallway.


    Maybe this was all just a dream. If she were to faint here, maybe everything would be settled and shed wake up in her bed.


    No. Unlikely. Ise scoffed at herself as she continued to run.


    <i>Haa huk</i>


    She was at her limit already. However, just before she copsed, Ise found someone.


    Ah.


    On the other side of the darkness, she found people there.


    Maybe


    No. Thats not a woman. Ise squinted and checked for sure, then she let out a small sigh of relief.


    Over there, thats surely a man. Its not Carynne at all. Finally! Ise cheered.


    Help! Please save me!


    Ise ran with all her might towards that figure.


    <i>Huuk, huk, huk</i> Mu Murderer, a murderer!


    Ise ran towards those people with all the strength left in her and then copsed. Warmth. Other people.


    Whats wrong?


    One of them held onto Ise and asked. People. Theyre real. She finally found other people.


    There there was a murder Carynne Hare Shes the murderer. She killed someone She killed her own father


    What are you


    The other man gasped as though he couldnt believe it either, then he groaned. It must be hard to believe for them. But whatever, its finally over. <i>Im safe.</i>


    The Fief Lord?


    Everything Everything is her fault


    Along with the relief that washed over her when she found other people, she felt her legs giving out from under her. That crazy woman. Youre finished now.


    Ise was about to crane her neck to look up. But she couldnt.


    <i>Urk.</i>


    Pale fingers wrapped around her neck. Ise struggled as that hand slowly lift her off the ground.


    Why?


    You know.


    Darkness shrouded Ises vision.


    I warned you many times.


    A baritone voice sank into her ears.


    Dont pay attention to useless things.

 Chapter 59

    Chapter 59


    Carynne gripped the silver candbra and leaned against the wall. She wanted to cry. So she did.


    Warm streams trickled down her cheeks. Theres no one here. Why? Where did that side character who slipped through her fingers disappear? She couldnt have possibly escaped from this hallway.


    Ise Where are you?


    Ise had disappeared. She disappeared when she was supposed to be <i>here.</i> Just like Nancy. Just like her on that day.


    Ise. Ise. Miss Ise Evans


    I can call you over and over like this, like a caring lover. Pleasee out. Please dont disappear. Die in my hands. Please,e out and scream. This is too much. Im spiraling back into the world of madness again and I hate it. It should be Carynne who kills Ise.


    But no matter how many times she walked up and down the corridor, she couldnt find the girl.


    ISELLA EVANS!


    Even though she yelled so loudly, Ise did note out.


    Carynne copsed to the ground. She couldnt stop crying. Pleasee out. I want you to die in my hands. Or you can kill me. I dont care whichever. I <i>hate</i> this nonsensical world. Nothing is clear, the truth is ambiguous, this ce is just <i>too much</i>.


    Pleasee out


    Carynne waited, moving only slowly. Its fine. This is still fine. Lets think about it. Lets cast doubt over it. Doubt is what will save me. Lets think it over again, where Ise went.


    But no. Its not fine.


    It hurts.


    Pain was shooting up from her foot. Carynne curled up in that hallway.


    It hurts so much


    I think Im dying.


    Carynne did not like pain.


    But what she hated more than pain was the fact that Ise was gone. Once again, Ise had disappeared. If she had seeded in escaping, she wouldnt have stayed so quiet.


    This situation was so heavy and unpleasant.


    Dont be like this.


    I seriously hate it, something like this. Was it too much to just wish for a person to die, to bury them six feet underground, to wait for that body to rot, hoping that time moves on?


    Carynne wiped away her tears and limped back to the fief lords study. Every step brought her pain. At best, her bones were just fractured. But it was this pain that, at least,forted Carynne.


    Ise disappeared and left Carynne in panic, but the pain that Ise inflicted was also the only thing that could save Carynne.


    Ill just go back.


    She already went back and forth many times. Its a waste of time to do one morep here. Carynne decided to confirm something else that was important.


    No way. I dont think thats it.


    Throughout the entire time she was on her way back to the study, Carynne muttered, <i>No way, no way.</i>


    Itse to this now, but its just too mean.


    Something was about to happen as she wished, but then, this again! The story got all ruined again, this is too much!


    Carynne suppressed the urge to scream and just forced herself to move. Moving with one swollen foot was taking too long and it was giving her so much pain. It took her at least five times longer than usual to walk back to the study.


    She closed her eyes and prayed.


    Please


    Please dont disappear, Father. I hate this. I hate having any delusions, I hate mysteries, too.


    Before opening the door, Carynne took a deep breath. She grabbed the knob, turned it around.


    <i>Ka-chak.</i>


    And opened the studys door.


    Ha.


    How fortunate. The fief lords body was still there, swaying slightly while suspended in the air. It looked the same as when she had left it before. Carynne let out a sigh of relief after making sure that its still there.


    What a relief. Father, youre really dead.


    Father.


    The body was hung right there. Although Ise had disappeared, her fathers corpse was still hanging like this. So, was it that Ise just really seeded in running away?


    Tom Are you there?


    Carynne held the candbra tighter as she looked around the room. Maybe Ises here, too. As they say, you return to where you begin. Right? Maybe. Ise might be hiding here while thinking that she wouldnt be found.


    Carynne looked under the desk and peeked through the bookshelves. She stumbled and copsed several times because her foot was in terrible pain, but she continued to look between the sofas and statues, hoping also to see a little head thats crouching for dear life


    Tom wasnt here.


    Did you run away to somece else?


    That might be the case. Carynne wasnt surprised by this. Since he had done something so resolutely just a while ago, he was surely already long gone, taking advantage of the current situation.


    If you wish for revenge, thene out now I can kill you, too.


    Even so, there was only silence in the room. Amidst the lonesome feeling that quietly settled in, the only one in here other than her was the fief lord, who had already be nothing but an object, moving slightly, slowly, to and fro like a pendulum.


    And then an outburst of screams.


    The servants could be heard yelling and shouting. The loudest voice was Borwens. Hes asking for people to evacuate the mansion.


    Ah


    Its over.


    Carynne covered her tear-stricken face with both hands.


    It was now impossible to fix everything.


    Anyone whos caught to have killed someone would be imprisoned.


    No, thats fine.


    This was not the worst oue. Its not. This was much betterpared to her father disappearing, Ise disappearing, everything else disappearingher sense of time, her sight, her senses getting all messed up.


    The current situation was this: the murderer would be caught and sent to jail.


    But of course, this was the lesser evil. Carynneughed dejectedly. Once shes been sent to jail, she would get no more information after this. If all went well, shed be deemed as a madwoman a madwoman who killed her own father.


    Ise would certainly testify to this. There was no point in trying to say that Tom was actually the one who killed the fief lord. Ise would be on the witness stand and testify that Carynne was the one who killed him and that Carynne attempted to kill Ise as well. She wouldnt be able to get out of this.


    Still, Carynne didnt feel particrly wronged by this supposed oue. Its true that she wanted to kill her own father. Well, wasnt it that shes actually enraged by the fact that she lost her prey?


    If Ises sessful, then its already hopeless for me.


    Its now impossible to fix everything. I should have killed Ise right away there. I didnt expect Ise to avoid the blow. Maybe even the fact that Ise saw Nancys body was wrong, just a trick to confuse me? Carynne thought that this might be possible.


    The fief lord had died a few times now, and every time it happened, Carynne had to squeeze out some tears somehow.


    And yet, on the other hand, Ise could shed tears from her eyes oh so effortlessly. To generate sympathy, to ridicule Carynne. You pitiful murderer.


    What now


    Carynne sat on the floor and took off her shoes. Her foot had be so swollen that even wearing a shoe over it was painful. Her head was also hot for some reasonno, it felt like her entire body had a fever.


    With this kind of situation, wouldnt it be better to just hit my head with a brazier and get it done and over with?


    Once Ise seeds in gathering people to her side, then Carynne would surely be thrown into a dark, damp prison, and she would have no more ess to more information in this life. If its like that, then the best course would be tomit suicide quickly to just skip over thisplicated situation.


    If thats sessful, too


    When its not the right time yet, hadnt she failed each suicide attempt from before? No, there was a time when it was sessful.


    I think? Or, no? Isnt this confusing?


    Carynne wasnt even sure of it anymore.


    Well, theres no meaning to this either anyway


    Carynne didnt like the idea of going to jail. In retrospect, dying in that ce would just be unpleasant and squalid. More than anything, it was going to be a physiological problem.


    She opened the window. The wind was cold over her eyes.


    Please let me kill myself. This is better than that.


    The wind blew strongly towards her. Carynne sat by the window and looked down at the ground below. If theres enough time, she could still be saved by medics.


    Ah, but I still feel like Ill die.


    Theyd be the perfect engagement giftthe corpses of the fief lord and Carynne. Ise and Verdic would be positively ecstatic.


    While crying and saying how scared she was, Ise would be back in Raymonds view. Without a hitch, the fiefdom would be in Verdics hands and hed benefit greatly from this. Time would move on like that, and


    Carynne would wake up in that garden once more.


    My coin


    She held her coin in one hand. This was her one and onlyfort throughout these years. Its the first thing shed think about during every beginning. It was the only evidence that could pull her back to her senses. As her entire body heated up, this coin alone opened her eyes to reality.


    Tears were blocking her eyesight.


    Carynne threw herself out the window.


    What are you doing?!


    But at that very instant, someone grabbed Carynnes arm and shouted at her in a furious voice.


    Its Raymond.


    This time, once again, he came to rescue her.

 Chapter 60

    Chapter 60


    Why are you doing this?!


    Sir Raymond, why must you show up like this. Its annoying.


    Is it not obvious? Im trying to kill myself.


    With this thought in mind, Carynne slumped over, one arm dangling like that. She must look funny right now.


    Please let go of me Sir Raymond, I dont want to live anymore.


    Carynne was wholeheartedly sincere. She did not have any strength left in her body. But the moment she felt Raymonds grip on her hand, she already knew that things wouldnt go ording to n.


    You saved me again. This isnt fun at all.


    Think about it againter. Dont lose hope just yet.


    Just as expected, he replied that way. He wouldnt let her die. At least, until that day came.


    Youre heavy, you know.


    Carynne didnt even have the strength to answer anymore. Raymond also stayed silent after that.


    Contrary to what he said however, Raymond lifted Carynne up with one arm effortlessly. But right now, he wasnt walking back deeper into the study, he just stood there by the window. At this, Carynne frowned a little. His eyes were prickly.


    Raymond stared at the inside of the study. Then, he asked Carynne.


    What happened to His Lordship?


    He killed himself.


    Carynne replied promptly.


    Why did he No, never mind. We have to think about how to get out of here alive first.


    Raymonds answer was sinct, but Carynne could guess the situation from just that.


    He didnt meet Ise.


    Its not so strange that the fief lord took his own life like this. Most of the territorys rights had been handed over to Verdic Evans, and there was virtually no hope left for the fief lord. Even if his daughter had gotten pped, he couldnt protest against it.


    The countess, who witnessed the act, seemed to be taking Carynnes side. Yet even as the countess expressed her anger at this, it was not for Carynnes sake, but only for the sake of catching Verdics weaknesses.


    Wasnt this just normal? Anyone would think so. They would think this: that the head of the family couldnt even protect his own child. That Carynne, as she had gone through so many things in the past, was now unable to endure this humiliation, and so naturally took this incident as the final nail in the coffin and chose to plunge to her death.


    His Lordship


    Raymond stared at the fief lords body, suspended in the air. Then, he looked at the copsed desk, and the room that Carynne had scrounged through. His expression was stiff.


    I see.


    Raymond now epted the fief lords death. And also felt sorry for Carynne. This death, as it was perceived, was the same once again this time. Its something that could be epted.


    Hiic.


    Whats different this time was Ise. Up until just now, Carynne thought that she had lost Ise in the chase.


    Though if you met Ise, you would have first asked me why I did that.


    Raymond was not questioning Carynne. As he asked about the fief lords suicide and judging by how he epted it, then he must not have met Ise yet.


    Would Carynne be able to get out of this?


    She remained silent and said nothing. After that pause, Raymond was the one who spoke and not her.


    The manor is on fire.


    Huh?


    Carynne looked at the door. There was a sea of mes. And she didnt even notice it? Only now realizing how long of a time had passed while she searched through the room, Carynne was stunned.


    But what, a fire? This was an even more ridiculous turn of eventspared to that elephant. Cant we just end it all with me killing Ise?


    Raymond continued.


    I dont know if well be caught in the mes. Everyone was screaming and running out, so I checked. But then I didnt see you or Miss Ise


    Whats going on this time? But either way, Carynne decided to do what she could.


    Carynne reached out towards Raymonds hand to stroke it, a forlorn smile on her lips.


    Sir Raymond, please go ahead alone. I dont wish to live any longer. My father has already passed on and I


    Carynnes expression was ovee by anguish as she recited the insincere plea. However, Raymond gritted his teeth and responded with firm determination.


    At the very least, not now. Because Im here to save you.


    How touching. About seventy years ago, she would have cried in his embrace. While thinking this, Carynne replied.


    In a situation like this, neither you nor I have a choice.


    Its like that. Carynne thought as she lowered her head.


    A fire.


    The fire was whats weighing heavily on Carynnes mind. Countless times in the past, she tried to set the mansion on fire.


    But I never seeded, not even once.


    A strange sense of triumph arose within her. Even when she tried to start a fire back then, it was extinguished before it could spread. However, this time, the fire had spread so widely. The same people were supervising the residence, but what changed?


    I wonder if Dun has a hand in this.


    At a point in time like this when the fief lord had already died, wasnt Dun the only one who had a means to control and maneuver the servants? Carynne was convinced.


    But on the other hand, she was also curious. How far was Dun involved in this, and what happened to Ise? In the end, until Ise were to show up, theres no point in this zing fire. If no one had seen Ise, then where exactly was she?


    Lets get out of here first. Im not going to take no for an ans Damn it!


    From the door, the fire had crept inside. The hallway was already up in mes. The room was now as clear as day.


    Father!


    And the fief lords body caught fire.


    Carynne!


    <i>Thud!</i>


    The noose holding the fief lord up snapped, and so he fell. The fire had spread so far that the mes were now surrounding the area where the fief lords body was.


    Father!


    Youre really no help at all!


    However, the corpse ignored Carynnes resentful cry and instead was quickly devoured by the mes. The parent was not doing as the child wished.


    Its dangerous! Its already toote!


    While holding Carynne tightly in his arms, he pulled her back.


    Father, please leave behind your bones. Because I was nning to bury you beside Mother. Now its not a burial, but a cremation. Still, I hope you burn peacefully. If I can recover your bonester on, Ill bury you as promised.


    No, besides that. The fire had spread to this extent, but is it actually going to kill me?


    This realization hurt her pride a little. The fact that the fire that <i>she</i> didnt start was the one threatening her life like thisshe didnt like it one bit.


    Ill have to live for now.


    Carynne settled on this decision. Just as Raymond said, she set aside her ns for suicide for the time being.


    Ise How.


    Carynne broached the subject cautiously. She had to tread carefully because she didnt know whats going on now, and she didnt know how its going to proceed from here.


    Raymond asked back.


    Miss Evans wasnt with you? Mister Verdic said that she definitely should have been with you.


    Which would benefit her more, to say that she did see Ise or that she didnt? Carynne was distressed by the dilemma that required snap judgment. She was too old to decide on such a big decision impulsively. Just like when she was dealing with Ise, she didnt know what she would have done if she had something to hit Raymond over the head with.


    About that


    When she couldnt answer properly, Raymond frowned.


    You didnt see her? In any case, before that, lets think about getting out of here first.


    That, he said.


    That was the girl whos about to be his fiance.


    Ise was already ranked below Carynne now.


    At this, Carynne felt both relieved and depressed at the same time. Was it because he considered Carynne to be more important, or was it just because shes the one he could save right away? What did Raymond think of Carynne?


    However, thinking about this matter was a luxury at the moment.


    She shook her head.


    Carynne.


    Yes.


    Raymond looked out the window as he called her name. She began to hear other peoples shouts and screams. Smoke started thickening by the window.


    She watched how Raymonds face shone amidst the mes illumination. Her eyes might just be deceiving her, but even his expression looked somehow bright.


    Raymond turned to Carynne.


    Were in trouble.


    Seems so.


    The fire has spread more than I thought. Do the pipes go all the way down?


    The pipes?


    She didnt know much about that. As Carynne looked back at him perplexedly, Raymond set her down on the ground.


    Carynne Hare, promise me here. Dont kill yourself today. Do it in consideration of me, since I came all the way here for you. Can you do that for me?


    Sure.


    Since its like that, then tomorrow, too.


    Thats a bit


    But Carynne didnt say this out loud. She had that much sense to keep that to herself at least.


    Will we be able to go to the roof from here?


    Its impossible from this room. We need to go out to the hallway for that.


    But it seemed impossible to go to the hallway now. Raymond clicked his tongue as he looked out the window again. It was high enough from the ground that Carynnes suicide attempt might have been sessful.


    From this height


    Raymond muttered as he regarded the height. And Carynne responded.


    I think its possible.


    She knew.


    Raymond alone would be able to jump safely from this height. She saw him do exactly that in the past.


    You think too highly of my capabilities.


    Youll be able to do it alone.


    His skilled gestures were something she wouldnt be able to mimic. But if hed carry her with her and jump? Thats going to be impossible to pull off. Two corpses would meet the ground.


    You promised you wouldnt say that. Please keep your word.


    Even still, Sir Raymond.


    Carynne was only speaking to herself, but she clenched her hand into a fist out of embarrassment. Fortunately, she would only look like a kindhearted woman whos grimly determined.


    Whatever Carynne did, Raymond paced the room and thought about it hard.


    I dont know about the inside of the room, and the fire is spreading too fast. If only we could go up to the roof and check. Where is the highest window in here?


    The study has two floors over there, that small window!


    With Carynne in his arms, Raymond ran to thedder.


    The sea of mes raged even harder.


    Ill go up first.


    Raymond quickly climbed thedder and opened the window, but because it served only as a skylight, it wouldnt open. As he tried to break the ss, Carynne turned her head to the side and watched with regret as the books that were getting damaged.


    I havent found any clues about Mother yet


    But theres nothing else she could do about it in this life. That goddamn arsonist. Did you really have to start a fire thatll wipe out everything thats important? The moment Carynne would find out who it was, she vowed to shoot a bullet right through that persons head.


    Whats that?


    Just a little ways away, there was an unmarked notebook stuck at one corner of the study. Carynne reached for it.


    Carynne!


    <i>Crack</i>


    Thedder broke.

 Chapter 61

    Chapter 61


    Before Carynne fell, Raymond narrowly managed to pull her up and out the window.


    Im sorry. But its my mothers memento


    Truthfully, it was just a notebook that she wasnt even sure about whether it was or was not her mothers memento. But you never know. Raymond didnt explicitly verbalize it, but he must think that shes being ridiculous.


    All right, lets save the words forter and leave first.


    <i>Whiiiizz.</i>


    The raging fire and passing breeze intertwined together over the Hare manor.


    As Raymond carried Carynne in his arms, he rolled his ankles a couple times as he stood on the roof, then he soon jumped off to the low roof below.


    <i>Thud, stagger.</i>


    AHH!


    Carynne hugged Raymonds neck tightly.


    Shit, do it right!


    She cursed inwardly, but she kept it in and gritted her teeth.


    Im asking just in case, but would you be able to bnce by yourself and go across that roof there?


    The roof that Raymond jerked his head towards was a roof that was burning and already a bit tilted, though the stone walls remained intact. Still though, the ce that shed have to walk over was just the exact width of her feet.


    Not everyones a monster like you, okay?


    Carynne shook her head.


    Even if both my feet were fine, I cant do that. Even if Ive died and woken up again a hundred times over, I cant.


    Its not a matter of whether she physically could or couldnt do it. As though unphased by what she said, Raymond nodded without a change to his expression.


    Then try not to breathe and just hang on.


    And Carynne did so.


    With her in his arms, Raymond hunched over.


    The familiar scent of gunpowder emanated from the man. Raymond jumped, but his figure mid-air looked as though he was soaring through the sky. Then, <i>thud!</i> A loud sound entered Carynnes ears. The sensation was horrifying.


    Falling was something she had gone through many times already, but now, the warmth of another human being was right next to her. And that was Raymond. So Carynne was not so scared this time.


    As long as hes around, she won''t die.


    At least, not until that day.


    As their bodies soared lightly for a moment, he stepped off the roof. Then, he started running down the wallso fast that its possible to hear the sound of the wind.


    !


    Carynne wanted to cover her ears, but she couldnt because she wastched onto Raymond. As he ran, Carynne heard the sound of windows cracking in their wake. Whoever it was left in there, it would be difficult to survive now.


    <i>Taak.</i>


    It wasnt until they finally reached the ground that Raymond set Carynne back down.


    Urk.


    Carynne tried to stand up by herself, but she soon faltered once more because of the pain that shot up her foot.


    Mdy!


    Donna came running at her. The maids face was covered in tear streaks.


    Oh my goodness, what do we do. Just what happened here Where is His Lordship? I didnt see hime out Hiic, uhk, hiic Mdy, are you alright?


    Carynne couldnt answer right away. She didnt even have enough energy to pull out a joke right now. Shes at her limit. Too much happened in just one night. She felt her strength leaving her body as she fell over while leaning into Donna.


    What do we do


    Donna hugged Carynne and wept. Carynne patted Donna, but even this became too troublesome for her.


    Ise


    Then, he showed up.


    My daughter, how


    With a dreadful expression, Verdic walked towards Carynne. At this, she bowed her head.


    Im curious about that too. Wheres Ise, I wonder. What happened. And, this situation.


    Why


    But nevertheless, it was awkward to look at Verdics face. All Carynne knew was that no one had since seen Ise.


    Howe.


    Carynne herself didnt know what she was feeling, whether she was happy, sad, or relieved.


    Verdic saw Raymondugh.


    Verdic saw Raymond.


    He looked like hesughing.


    * * *


    Please, dont let me open my eyes.


    I used to pray like this every single time I fell asleep. If only it could all end so that I could stop thinking forever.


    But this was nothing but a futile wish. When I opened my eyes, the day would start again. I know. I know it already. Everyday, it was the same people, the same smiles, the same tears. I despair as I regain consciousness in the dark, and again, I despair as I wake up once more.


    Mdy, are you alright?


    Still, it wasforting to be wrapped in a warm nket instead of the garden where the start always happened.


    The garden was always cold. That coldness which brought upon shivers, its not here. Its not cold this time.


    Who killed me this time? No. Im the one who killed someone else this time. I killed someone. Nobodys going to kill me. Ink on paper, the faint sound of a piano. No. Not this time. Not yet.


    Mdy.


    Whose voice was that? It wasnt that low but steady voice that had a slightly garbled pronunciation. This was a womans voice who was a bit younger.


    Ah, right. I killed Nancy. This girl isnt Nancy. This voice is Donnas. The slightly younger, lively girls voice. Different from how its always been. A voice owned by someone who didnt have enough of a grudge that shed kill Carynne.


    Are you alright?


    Eugh.


    Carynne tried to open her eyes, but she couldnt.


    Was she blind now? Thankfully, that wasnt the case. When she raised her hand to her eyes, she found something draped there. How long had she been unconscious?


    Uh.


    She opened her lips, but her dry throat and lips made it impossible for her to speak. Carynne opened and closed her lips a few times, and Donna moistened her lips and eyes with a wet towel.


    She came back to life again. Her eyes were dazzled by brightness. Carynne looked at the ceiling over Donnas hand as she wiped her face gently. The bright, cream-colored wallpaper was enough to tell her that this wasnt her room.


    Wa, ter.


    Here you are.


    How long have I been unconscious?


    Three days. I really thought that Mdy was also going to to die! Hiic


    Donna burst into tears.


    Also?


    Carynne asked. Donna hupped and said, <i>Ack </i>Then she mped her lips shut.


    Did a lot of people get hurt?


    Mi Mdy.


    Donna nervously exined.


    Please dont be surprised Truthfully, His Lordship hes


    Not that.


    Carynne had to bow her head to hide the irritation that had shed over her face. Her hair cascaded over the bed. Something elsesomething that she didnt already know.


    Wasnt it that right before I fell unconscious, Im the one who said that Father couldnt make it out of there? You dont remember? Did you forget because a few days have passed, huh?


    Carynnes face was devoid of any emotion. But even so, Donna wept at her own face and mourned for the dead fief lord. Maybe shes letting out this excessive emotion at the possibility that shed be out of a job soon. At least, thats how it was in Carynnes eyes.


    Was this girl really grieving over some strangers death? You hired such a great maid, Father. Though shes not good at her job.


    A brief moment passed as Carynne waited for Donna to calm down. Then, she tried to ask again.


    Speak slowly. Where are we right now?


    The ceiling was cream colored, the wallpaper was full of flower patterns. The suns rays gently lit up the entire room, and one the side, there was a table full of tea and refreshments.


    Theres no need to say it, honestly. Its Carynnes first time here, but not really.


    Youre in my home, Lady Hare.


    Mister Verdic.


    The most ufortable and awkward man to be around appeared. Carynne felt Donna freeze up next to her. Carynne furtively touched her own neck. Its still intact.


    What happened to Ise?


    In any case, given that her head was still attached to her body, and seeing as that middle-aged man over there wasnt holding an axe in his hands, perhaps in the end, Ise didnt manage to escape the mansion?


    Donna, go out.


    Beneath the sheets, Carynne clenched one hand into a fist.


    Yes.


    As Donna left, Verdic drew nearer to the bed.


    For a moment, he remained silent.


    Im sure youre aware of the situation.


    My father passed away.


    Yes. Its truly unfortunate.


    Sure. Carynne recalled the way Verdicughed back then. Heughed.


    Heughed as he said this.


    Miss Hare. His Lordship hung himself. My condolences.


    While his eyes were so full of mirth.


    Since hes entrusted you to me Why dont you help out my daughter? It might be good to have you as herpanion who she can confide in.


    Carynne recalled this.


    But this time, Verdic wasntughing. He stayed silent. His hands were sped together, his head was bowed, and his expression remained at a grimace.


    Something must have happened to Ise.


    Carynne felt a small surge of exhration. If it had happened, she would have wanted to throw her decapitated head at him at this moment.


    The silence in the air continued to stretch between them. When Carynne could no longer stand it, she was the one who spoke up first.


    Mister Verdic?


    Ill say this frankly.


    Go ahead.


    Will you be my daughter?

 Chapter 62

    Chapter 62


    He set down his trembling hand, which held a pipe. His eye rims were red.


    The world was falling apart. Even if he yelled or ripped his head off, the reality would remain unchanged.


    Mister Verdic, the Countess would like to talk to you about the engagement ceremony and the assembly.


    Get out! Leave me alone!


    <i>nk!</i>


    Verdic yelled as he threw the inkwell. However, the servant remained stationed at the door. The ck ink spilled and seeped into the carpet. That womans servant continued to deliver the message, again in that indifferent voice by the door.


    The Countess said that you must meet her.


    He wiped his own tears.


    That goddamn woman. My weakness got caught, and now look at this. The engagement ceremony was right around the corner. And my daughter. In thest conversation we had, I shouted at her.


    Verdics expression was distorted as he took a deep breath.


    Please tell her that I will be there in a moment.


    Verdics chest was all ripped apart. What a terrible thing. But whats more terrible was the fact that he wasnt even allowed enough time to cry for his daughter.


    The numerous ns hed drawn up to secure Ise and Raymonds marriage was all for naught.


    He covered his face with his hands.


    Verdic needed to continue working. He took out a handkerchief and wiped the spilled ink. However, the ink had already seeped into the material. Even the handkerchief just got dirty.


    Verdics tears trickled down, over the ink stains.


    It was a luxury to even grieve.


    Ise! Ise! Where are you!


    Mdy!


    Verdic grabbed the shoulder of the crying maid.


    Its not the two of them?


    Where is her room!


    The mes are too strong, its impossible to go back inside!


    Get out of my way!


    Amidst the roaring mes, the fief lords mansion was being burned to the groundthe mansion that Verdic wanted to get his hands on. But even if it copsed, it wouldnt matter. Verdics daughter, Ise Evans, was still in there.


    Its dangerous, Mister Verdic.


    Sir Raymond Lord Raymond Please save my daughter.


    Verdic gripped Raymonds arm. He was willing to strike a deal with as much gold as the other man wanted. He would offer all of his assets if asked.


    However, Raymonds face.


    Mister Verdic. I am not someone who can extinguish mes.


    There on Raymonds face, Verdic saw a faint smile.


    It might have just been a trick of the light. He might have just seen it wrong. Raymond didnt reject him outright. But he continued to speak.


    I do not know this ce that well. It would be best to straighten out the situation through the servants.


    He was right. Raymond was a knight. He was a soldier, and even the fief lord himself wasnt here. The situation was like that.


    But But.


    Whatever happened to a persons heart?


    When Raymond came out of the mansion with that girl in his embrace, Verdic copsed to the ground, his eyes wide open.


    His daughter yearned for that man so much, wanted to have for herself so much, and yet the one he brought out was Carynne Hare, not Ise. This was something Verdic could not bear.


    Useless, glib bastard.


    What Verdic had given Ise was defective. Thats what Verdic thought of Raymonda useless knight who didnt save his daughter.


    The one who brought his daughter out was Dun.


    This gloomy man had been so humiliated by Ise, yet he did not hesitate to save her. Even though Ise was now in aa after inhaling too much of the smoke, even though there was a huge burn on her neck and bruises all over her body, she was still alive.


    But It wouldnt be strange if shed pass away any day.


    When Verdic tried to embrace his daughter, who miraculously survived, Dun stopped him and said that it might be too much of a strain on her. Instead, Verdic confirmed that Ise was breathing by bringing a finger near her nose.


    Dunter told Verdic that he would stay at his mansion to continue taking care of Ise. Verdic thanked Dun. They werent on good terms, but he was willing to stay in their family mansion for Ises sake. Unlike his appearance, he was truly a saint who used his medical abilities for good.


    Its not allowed.


    It would be best for you to stand aside. This concerns Miss Ise.


    He heard a scuffle outside.


    Open the door!


    At Verdics shout, the ck-d priest slowly entered.


    Lord Dun.


    Please tell me shes alright. Please tell me that my child can smile again.


    However, the news that Dun came to bring was devoid of any hope.


    The situation is very bad, Mister Verdic.


    IIs that, so.


    Shes still alive. Lets hope that God bestows upon her His grace, Verdic Evans.


    As long as shes alive, shell wake up one day. Isnt that right, Reverend?


    Verdic looked at the other man earnestly, however Duns expression wasnt good. He spoke slowly.


    I cant give you a definite answer. I will attend to her while Im at her side. I also wish for the best.


    But it was a matter of course that Ises situation was grave. Duns expression wrinkled slightly.


    Thank you very much truly. Thank you, Reverend. I will offer a donation to the parish. And please, partake in anything you may need here at my residence


    Alright.


    Dun looked at the floor for a moment, then he said to Verdic.


    Then, would you grant me a favor?


    Verdic was willing to pay anything, even if what he asked was a fortune.


    However, what he asked for was nothing that he could have expected.


    * * *


    Under thew of session, the fief lords seat fell unto Dun.


    Instead of the fief lords seat, the property was originally left behind for Carynne Hare, however the fire had destroyed all of the possessions that were supposed to be hers.


    This wasnt a surprise to Carynne. However, it might have been a bolt out of the blue for  Carynne .


    It wouldnt be a bad thing for you either. To be my adopted daughter.


    I guess so.


    Her father died again this time, and Dun became the fief lord. The difference from before was that  Carynne  didnt want to marry Dun, so she entered the Evans household while saying that she would be Isesdy-in-waiting.


    But now, she was here as the Evans familys adopted daughter.


    Carynne nced down at the papers in front of her. There was no reason for her to refuse. Just as Verdic said, she wouldnt lose anything from this. But if there was one thing she wanted to quibble over.


    Ive now be Carynne Evans.


    She didnt care for the way that name sounded. As though he had caught onto this, Verdics eyebrows twitched.


    Even if they were destitute, Hare was Hare and Evans was Evans. There was a difference in their social standing.


    Carynne could already imagine what Countess Elva would say to Verdicthat he was a merchant who was trying to buy pedigree with money.


    A womansst name isnt that important anyway. When you get married, your name will change to your husbands.


    But <i>your</i> daughter didnt like that idea very much either.


    I see.


    Carynne picked up the pen and signed her name.


    Now, she was no longer Carynne Hare, but Carynne Evans. It was something that couldnt be helped even if she tried to think it over. Theres no other option that she could consider anyway.


    How is the schedule?


    Tomorrow. Ill call the minimum number of people, so theres nothing special to prepare.


    I guess so.


    Carynne felt as though she had be a parrot. There was not much difference between them.


    Verdic briefly talked about the schedule of the engagement ceremony. At this, Carynne recalled Ises engagement ceremony in the pastit was early autumn back then, but this time, it was early summer.


    Was the story going to continue like this? Was she going to marry Raymond again? Was her exciting fun over now?


    Carynne thought that this was a bit boring. After all that, shes just going to marry Raymond?


    This time, once more, the plot was going all too swimmingly.


    For her to marry Raymond as Verdics adopted daughter was much too smooth and slippery.


    To the point of annoyance.


    You can wear my daughters clothes, and from now on, you can appear at functions as my daughter. Either you or my daughterthat is, my real daughter Since you both havent officially made your social debut yet.


    And Ill also marry your daughters fiance.


    Verdic didnt seem to be very happy about this kind of story.


    Neither was Carynne.

 Chapter 63

    Chapter 63


    The situation itself was awkward, but thefort of privilege was something that Carynne appreciated. First, her meals. Having better meals than she expected made her happy faster than she thought.


    Delicious.


    She took a spoonful of soup into her mouth, closed her eyes and savored the rich vors upon her tongue. The scent of sauted onions permeated through the dish of finely mashed potatoes. And with the soup, the broth used might have been chicken as it was filling.


    Reminded of the coarse oat porridge that she used to eat in the past, this felt so new. That porridge was what Ise fed her maids before. Thenter, rotten food.


    Food can be delicious even in this kind of situation, I guess.


    Uhk hiic


    Interpreting Carynnes words all by herself, Donna brought a hand to her mouth as her shoulders shook. She continued to murmur things like, Even so, we have to live, Stay strong, Mdy, and so on.


    Would Nancy be more useful now? Carynne was curious about this.


    Yeah, Nancy should be spared next time. And then theres also that curious notebook.


    It would be great if that notebook turned out to carry all the exnations that could solve everything properly. Carynne felt that it was a shame. She should have chosen to look at its contents even if it meant that she would burn to her death. Whats so important about living?


    I dont care about riches, I wanted to save Mothers belongings more.


    Mdy!


    The maid eventually burst into tears. Carynne patted Donna on the back. Really, she wanted to send the girl away because she was getting in the way of Carynnes meal.


    Should I ask Mister Verdic for a new maid? I think hell do that much for me.


    Hiic, hiic Our poor Lady, how can


    Did things turn out well in the end? Carynne tilted her head to the side.


    Ah, Father died. Thats whats sad, I guess.


    Tears trickled down Carynnes eyes once more. However, that didnt seem to be what Donna was referring to.


    Mdy, it was btedly revealed The truth is


    Donna tried to read how Carynne would react. She hesitated before she finally answered.


    Lady Ise is alive.


    <i>Ba-thump.</i>


    Carynne felt her heart racing faster. This was much more exciting than her engagement to Raymond.


    Ise is alive.


    She couldnt open her eyes now, but Lord Dun is Towards Mister Verdic, hiic


    <i>Ba-thump.</i>


    Tell it to me straight, Donna.


    Carynne licked her lower lip. Things were progressing in a fun direction.


    She tried to harden her expression.


    Since you have a great knowledge in nursing someone, Mdy As soon as you get well, I heard that you will start taking care of Lady Ise


    What


    Something like washing someone elses body and giving them medicine everyday is something that anyone can do well, but How can that kind of job be dumped onto Mdy! Thats just too much, really!


    <i>Ba-thump.</i>


    It was just like the past.


    Again.


    Bing Isesdy-in-waiting.


    Just like in Carynnes memories.


    Really. This all was just like the plot inside a book.


    * * *


    Reverend Alright. Frankly, I have absolutely nothing to lose. Thats why I dont understand. Why must you go about this so cumbersomely?


    Verdic was genuinely curious about this. Dun slowly raised his head and faced the other man. Even as Verdic was worn-out, in his eyes, Dun looked terribly uncanny.


    Because I, hate that girl.


    Ha.


    Verdics mouth gaped open at the unexpected answer.


    M-Make her take care of the catose Miss Ise. That girls fate is no more than being a maid who cleans up blood and pus. Make her suffer as much as possible.


    The priests expression told Verdic just how much he couldnt stand her because of his loathing for her.


    Verdic knew what kind of face that was all too well. It was the same face hed see in a mirror if hed think about Raymond.


    Thats.


    Duns cheeks reddened. He continued speaking with his teeth gnashed together.


    My revenge towards her for throwing me away.


    So, Verdic dly extended his hand towards Dun.


    * * *


    Carynne wore Ises dress. It was an extremely colorful dress that fitted Carynne well. As if it found its rightful owner. Ise was surely a sizerger than Carynne, but these clothes seemed to be shouting out that Carynne was its real owner, not Ise.


    I extend my congrattions But truthfully, I dont know if its right to celebrate. At the very least, its a time when its possible to shed tears once and thenugh once as well. Im sure this willfort Lord Hare as well.


    Countess Elva came and took Carynnes hand. Her presence in this ceremony made the engagement official. Delia, the countess other daughter, offered a present to Carynne, who then formally expressed her gratitude. Unlike Ise, Carynne was truly a natural at this and was well-mannered.


    Countess Elva watched her, pleased.


    As expected, youre more suited. Raymond is quite the splendid young man. A groom like him wouldnt be the right man for a merchant family. Im d that hell be engaged to a splendid young woman such as you, Miss Carynne.


    Countess Elva said this without lowering her voice. As she spoke loudly, obviously with the intention for other people to hear, Carynne felt awkward around her.


    The surrounding gazes quite stung on her face. Half of those people were fellow debtors who agreed with the countess, and the other half were the ones on Verdics side, displeased.


    Thank you foring.


    Typical courtesy was convenient at times like this. She retreated in a way that others wouldnt find fault with, and there, her male lead approached.


    Youre beautiful, Carynne.


    Thank you, Sir Raymond.


    Just as he did in the past, just like a mythical male god, just like the main character in a novelRaymond held Carynnes hand.


    Its as if You are my true destiny.


    Carynne shut herself up and instead held his arm. Carynne despised destiny. Was it going to repeat again this time? She killed people like that and chopped up a corpse to pieces, but did all that mean nothing?


    And Carynne.


    Raymond whispered to her.


    Arent Miss Ises heels much too high?


    Pardon?


    He gently wrapped an arm around Carynne and propped her up.


    It looks like your feet are in pain. You can rely on me more. You look like youre having a hard time.


    What?


    Dont move too much.


    Carynne had to hold onto Raymond tighter so that she wouldnt copse to the ground right then.


    Now


    Mister Verdic.


    Obviously forced to smile, Verdic greeted Carynne and Raymond. Both of his arms were exaggeratedly outstretched as heughingly spoke.


    What a sight you are for the eyes, Sir Raymond. Yes, its only right to smile on such a joyful day.


    Of course. I am only fulfilling my promise.


    Its all thanks to Carynne Hare no, my daughter now, Carynne Evans.


    More importantly, its thanks to your judgment, Mister Verdic. My older brother sent a telegram, so he must have been worried. Seriously, he still treats me like Im a ten-year-old child.


    Is the Baron still like that?


    Carynne heard none of this exchange.


    What did he just say? What did this manthis knightknow exactly, that he said I should rely on him more? How did he know that Ises shoes were hurting me? Was it just a guess? But why? What does he know? For what?


    Goosebumps rose on her skin.


    However, Carynne couldnt open her lips here. There were much too many eyes that would see. Verdic was standing in front of them two, and Raymond just conversed with exceeding politeness until the ceremony was over.


    The sky was clear, the mansion was extravagant, and the betrothed man and woman were beautiful.


    It was such a picturesque engagement ceremony.


    Carynne grew curious.


    Carynne, youre pale. Are you alright?


    Thank you. Im fine Sir Raymond.


    Lets hypothesize.


    I was told that the answer was love, and Catherine was released from this terrible curse because of Fathers love for her.


    Just in case its love, if the answer was love, if it truly was that emotion, which was absolutely not needed and was based purely on fleeting sentiments, then what kind of feelings does Raymond have for me? And what kind of feelings do I harbor now?


    Was it truly as Carynne thought, that it was love?


    Carynne contemted.


    Fathers love towards me wasnt enough. But shouldnt that love alone be enough? Since love was the answer. But perhaps what I received from him was not love.


    What if Raymond didnt love me enoughwhat if he didnt love me at all? Then what if I couldnt be released from this curse? Not just Raymond, but what if no other man out there will love me?


    What kind of feelings did Raymond have for me thus far? And what kind of feelings does he have for me now?


    Carynne wants to open Raymonds head and look inside.


    .


    .


    .


    In the Hare manor, which had been burned to the ground, two corpses were found. Tom could not escape the burning mansion in the end.

 Chapter 64: That knight

    Chapter 64: That knight


    <b> 00. That knight</b>


    Raymond Saytes. The man who Carynne thought was her male lead.


    Back when Raymond was around the age Carynne was now, he entered the military academy. Then, two yearster, he was deployed to the battlefield. Raymonds home country was not at war, but these things happened at times. The country had to send troops elsewhere to save face.


    But it was honorable to me.


    An honorable war, he said. As Carynne listened to his story, it sounded like a distant tale. Sheforted him, she wept for him.


    But like any other good story, it was inevitable to get tired of it after listening to it. After ten years of hearing the same story, Carynne got bored of it.


    To Carynne, everything in this world was inside a novel anyway. That story wasnt even about  Carynne . That war beyond the White Mountain Range was only a tragedy to serve as a backstory for Raymond. Once upon a time, long ago, there was a brave knightsomething like that. It was a story thats more tangible than a legend or a myth, but more distant than a priests weekly sermon.


    It would have been better if dragons and demons existed. Like the knights of ye olde, with either a spear or a sword rather than a gun, conquering dragons instead of fellow men. Its no fun now. In the end, it came to a point that the story became less interesting than a fairy tale.


    I wish to love. I wish for it to be true love.


    Raymond sometimes woke up gasping for air in the middle of the night


    What do you think, Ise?


    Carynne asked as she wiped down Ises limp body. Ise did not answer. And Carynne did not care about that fact at all. She inwardly took somefort in receiving this new doll, which listened to her worries.


    Compared to Tom, theatose Ise was even less responsive, but this girl held more significance to Carynne in more ways than Tom did. So to speak, this was a valuable rarity.


    You and Sir Raymond as a couple while standing side by side would be quite the sight to see. The wedding, too, <i>da-dun, da-dun </i>and with you two in matching colors, Mister Verdic will surely be satisfied.


    Now that I think about it, youre both blonds, huh. Sir Raymond has great hair, considering he rolled around in the battlefield before. Its fascinating. Ah, men have shorter hair, so its only natural. Women have long hair, so its difficult to maintain


    Carynne rubbed Ises scalp and made bubbles.


    Sir Raymond, Ive.


    That man. Ive been thinking about him.


    Shes been thinking about him ever since. And hes clearly been avoiding any time hed be alone with hertely. Truthfully, Carynne had so many things to do, so she often used the time tending to Ise to grumble and organize her thoughts.


    Its like his hairs made out of gold. I asked him what he uses on it, but he just answered, I dont put anything on it, and it was clear on his face that he found my question nonsensical? And there was a look in his eyes that was asking how could a man do something like that? Seriously, thats why I wish that it bes fashionable for women to cut our hair short, too. I heard that in the countries beyond the mountain range, theres quite a lot of women who wear their hair short


    Carynne exined as she imagined herself withdies who had hair as short as mens. It was so unfathomable. They werent in the middle of a war, but there were many women who had short hair.


    Indeed, its a bit straight, right? If bobbed hair bes popr,ter on perhaps being bald can be in style.


    While giggling, she poured hot water on Ises hair.


    Ise, have you yed with dolls before? I dont remember ever ying with dolls. I dont know. I dont remember My childhood was such a long time ago. Im sure you did it a lot. Theres still many dolls in the room you used to have. They were all luxurious items. The dollhouse is an amazing antique piece, too. I believe its a replica of a 300-year-old mansion. The detailed essories are magnificent as well. The interior design is modern though, so it really looks like an aristocrats home. The paintings inside are also copies of real famous paintings, and even the books lining the little shelves I found out that theres actually words and pictures on them. Rather than letting a child y with it, I thought that a work of art like that should be ced in a ss box and be put on disy.


    To be honest, I took a doll out for a bit. I didnt get your permission first, so Im sorry. But I was wondering how far the dolls bare body would resemble the real deal, thats why. Ive been curious about it for a while now, but I never got the chance to check. Way back when, I tried to touch one of your dolls, but Miss Ise, you pulled my hair and um it did hurt a bit. Anyway, the doll was borately made, but thats all there is. Obviously. Fufu.


    Carynne thought about those dolls inside. She also thought that she was like those dolls, as clich as it was, but wasnt a clich thought like that somethingmon to many people? Carynne, Raymond and Ise were like dolls being controlled by someone elses hands. ording to the situation, they would meet, separate, fall in love.


    Seeing a male soldier doll with blue ss beads as his eyes made her think about Raymond. Even his clothes resembled Raymonds uniform, so it reminded her of him even more. The dolls clothes were a replica of a real knights uniform, so its only natural that she did.


    The color of their eyes are a little different, but it resembles Sir Raymond a whole deal. Its only typical since hes the standard handsome guy. Hes like a doll. Hes got clearly defined facial features, hes tall, his skin is nice and his body is good.


    Thats why Carynne was also under the impression that he was the male lead. But now she wondered if she really did read the  book . After her fathers death, Carynne was now leaning more towards the theory that she inherited her mothers mental illness. And this theory stemmed from Catherines delusion of thinking that she was an individual who came from outside the book, and that her daughter Carynne was also an outsider.


    And under the active consent of the fief lord, Nancy and Dun turned Carynne into a lunatic.


    Its funny to think about myself in this way. Whats up with that, if youre a lunatic, then you shouldnt be able to realize that youre a lunatic, so if you start to suspect that youre a madman and say that youre not crazy, isnt that a real joke? Whats the point of doubting yourself? What do you know, when in just one day you can have hundreds, thousands, tens of thousands of thoughts? How could you think that the conclusion youvee up with by yourself is the same as a philosophers thoughts? How could the thought processes of a normal person and a madman be lumped together. Philosophers arent lunatics. How can they assure it So the fact that I the fact that Im not <i>mad</i> after inheriting this lunacy from my mother I wonder how it can be proved.


    Above all else, what Carynne needed was that proof. If theres someone else who was repeating their existence just like her, then would this pain go away? If theres someone else who was repeating their <i>life</i> just like her, then would this pain go away? She wanted proof that she wouldnt be subjected to more pain. But in a world where it was impossible to be sure of anything, it was much too dreadful to endure.


    Or perhaps, if I die, then it will all be over.


    Carynne patted Ises hair dry with a towel and squeezed out the moisture. Then, she infused some aromatic oil on it. Argan oil was whats been wiped on her hair, then again, hot water was brought below so that it could be steamed.


    Since its so much work to maintain and improve your hair like this so its softer to the touch, it must be worthwhile for whoever gets to touch itter Have strength, Ise.


    I hope your condition can improve a bit with this.


    Staring at Ises dry, ill-colored hair, Carynne sighed.


    Then, she took out the rose water and applied it to Ises face.


    I heard that this has a concentration of 30,000 rose bushes, but is that true?


    Mm. At this point though, I dont think that you or Mister Verdic would let yourselves be scammed. Maybe.


    I know that youre jealous of me because youre insecure about your looks.


    Carynne stood up for a moment, then tapped her own shoulder.


    Uuugh, Im aching all over. After all that, Im ady-in-waiting again. And youre Lady Ise. Well, even if he said that, Mister Verdic doesnt really want me to be his real daughter, of course.


    Ise, do you love Sir Raymond?


    Carynne was curious about that.


    Do you truly love him? With all your heart? To the extent that if its not that person, it feels like youll die? Or maybe, do you wish to grow old with him, see your children and then close your eyes forever at the same timelike that?


    Ise wouldnt answer. Carynne was curious about Ises true feelings. Her thoughts had be soplicated because of her parents. Love. What about it. For as much as intense and strong a fleeting emotion like that was, Carynne knew it was ephemeral.


    In the same way that she couldnt tell whether she was crazy or not as there was no criteria or yardstick for it, love was the same case for Carynne as well. She didnt know. How would she know if her love and other peoples love were the same? How would she be able to confirm that the feelings of Catherine, who had found the answer, were the same as the feelings of a normal person?


    To be honest, love um yeah. Uh I also had a father. I once had a mother, too. I cant remember, but I met your mother once, Miss Ise. But youre prettier than your mother. Thats apliment. Anyway, what Im saying is, my father said that love will give me salvation. True love It will save me from this hell, he said. But then Im still in hell.


    Is the true love between my parents not the same as the love between Sir Raymond and I?


    A rhythmic cadence could be heard apanying the IV drip. Only she and Ise existed in that quiet room.


    This space was exceedingly tranquil.


    Carynney down next to Ise and closed her eyes.


    It wasnt that great of a love.


    A smile curled up on her lips. For Carynne, the fief lords love was only just ordinary love. Carynne wished for equivalence. She wanted a love that had the same weight as death. Complete understanding and trust. She yearned for love that would not be afraid of death.


    Ises sickbed was ced at the highest floor, which was the quietest ce in the mansion. Morbidly white walls. A serene and neat space. Ise, who did not respond at all, was a less engaging conversation partnerpared to Tom, but Carynne was satisfied with this.


    Ise Raymond hated you. He probably still isnt fond of you. Its something that couldnt be helped. From all the way back in the past For all one hundred years, he never loved you, not even once.


    Carynne thought about it. Raymond was a knight dedicated to her, through and through. And he was cruel to other women, including Ise. This time, too, its the same case just as she thought. Any woman didnt like a man who was kind to everyone. It should be a man who was kind only to her. To have him all to herself.


    Indeed What to do. Its truly only towards me only towards  Carynne Hare  that hes sweet If ites to a point that hes got the entire world against him as he points his gun out for the sake of one thing, its either these two. Perhaps something that he holds dear.


    Carynne dressed Ise with her outer clothing.


    Or perhaps something that seems important as itse in his sight.


    Did he lie about his feelings towards her? Carynne thought about why Raymond was the one for herself. Was he really the kind of person whod fall in love at first sight and uphold that love unconditionally? Was that truly possible?


    What do you think?


    Even if all the girl did was sleep with her eyes constantly closed, if she was being taken care of every day, theres no difference. Whenever Verdic came back, Carynne got everythingid out for her, even her makeup. Although Verdic was thinking that Ise was getting better gradually.


    Really, what do you think.


    There was a huge burn on Ises throat.


    But thanks to that massive scar, the mark that Carynne left when she pummeled Ise on the head wasnt noticed.


    Carynne wordlessly hovered a pillow over Ises face. If she were to press down for a few minutes here, it would be over. The room was serene. The suns rays seeped into the room. Its beautiful. The bright, lovely ward was filled with heavenly quietude.


    If I strangle your neck here


    She picked up the pillow. Her lips drew up into a curve.


    Then my neck would be shed, right?


    She rose to her feet and opened the window. The summer breeze swept into the room. How refreshing. Carynne closed her eyes for a moment, then opened them once more. Its a beautiful world.


    The weather is so nice.


    * * *


    In the middle of the night, Carynne knocked on Raymonds door.


    I dont believe this behavior is bing of ady, Carynne Evans.


    Raymond trailed off a little at the end of the sentence.


    This name doesnt suit you quite yet. In any case, if its not urgent, I think it would be best for us to meet during dinner tomorrow instead.


    So what exactly are you trying to get me to say in front of ten other people?


    Carynne was taken aback for a moment because of Raymond, and it was as if she had forgotten what she was about to say.


    Then, would it be alright if I close the door now? I bid you a pleasant evening.


    Sir Raymond, actually, I love you.


    The door was opened.

 Chapter 65

    Chapter 65


    Raymond Saytes.


    With the door to the side, Raymond frowned.


    Do you have to go as far as say something like that and insist on conversing thiste at night?


    Because you keep avoiding me.


    ring at Raymond, she pushed the door open and made her way inside.


    I was so sad that I could cry. Cant you see how my feelings have been hurt.


    If you really have shed tears, then Id understand.


    Would shedding tears make you offer a cup of tea?


    Please have a cup. Itste at night though, so Ill add some milk.


    And, the door closed.


    Raymond turned around and headed towards the hot water. He had no luggage in the room. Certainly, there were only three sets of clothes inside the closet, and all of his belongings would fit in just one bag.


    On the table, there was a watch, a pair of gloves, some documents, and a hot water bottle with a warmer wrapped around it. Rather than something from here at Ises vi, it was a dull-looking bottle used by military personnel.


    Most of the luggage would be carried by Xenon, but his belongings were still too few. As if he was ready to leave at any given time. Because Ises vi was not his home. It was a ce hed one day leave.


    Even this aspect was definitely the same as how she remembered it. But, no. The person inside this familiar ce was not entirely familiar. Carynne wasnt confident whether she was just figuring things out after seeing it, or whether everything she could remember was just one huge bout of dj vu.


    Perhaps guessing her thoughts as she stared nkly, Raymond handed her a cup and spoke.


    Theres no particr reason. Its not like I dont trust Mister Verdic in this small territory. I just pack lightly.


    As he uttered the unprompted excuse, he poured the hot water and made tea. It was a simple cup of tea that tasted neutral enough, worth neither like nor dislike. It was a bit unfortunate that she couldnt drink the tea that she usually enjoyed, but enjoying things that are popr werent always as bad.


    Raymond started off with a topic for their conversation.


    Mister Verdic has been interested in the coffee industrytely.


    Its going to be difficult.


    Carynne traced her memories. This business venture wouldnt be very sessful for Verdic. There was a time when Ise took some to present to a salon, but the new vor was an acquired taste only for some aristocrats and some of the middle-ss. Moreover, it couldnt be mass produced to the public.


    Hearing Carynnes answer, Raymond asked curiously.


    Why is that?


    Ah, damn. Carynne berated herself for inadvertently answering again. She pretended to know, for no reason at all. This conversation wasnt anything important anyway. She was just trying to remember things from the past, but then she pointed it out. In the end, people would find it difficult to tell their own stories, but they loved to point out whats the truth and whats not. She felt somewhat disillusioned towards herself.


    It has dark pigment, so its easy to mix and sell with other low-grade things. Its easier to replicate at a lower qualitypared to clear tea. Thats why the public wont partake in it easily.


    Is that a metaphor pertaining to yourself?


    No, Im just showing off.


    Did he think that shed get surprised if he caught her off-guard? Carynne answered calmly nheless. There was a grin on Raymonds lips as he brought his cup of tea to them.


    So, you didnt fall for it, Carynne said.


    Please dont do that again. Confessing to me, and opening my door.


    Youre amazing, arent you. I want to apud you.


    But contrary to what she said, she didnt p. She just drank her hot tea.


    Raymond wasnt a picky eater. Ises the one whos quite picky. <i>A woman raised to be so prim like you just isnt good!</i> was something shed say. No, well, would it be better to grow up to be so rugged then? Carynne wondered, momentarily thinking to herself.


    Youve got a funny expression.


    What do you think of a woman whos very picky with her food?


    I dont particrly care for a woman who acts in that way.


    In the midst of the courteous and lighthearted mood, what she wanted to say was out of ce. In the middle of the yful conversation, Carynne felt a chilly looke her way. It wouldnt be good if Raymond acted this way. Amidst theughter was a sharp knife, and the people who behaved casually were utterly different. Thetter was dangerous.


    His suspicions are raised.


    Which part? Until where?


    She was curious about that. Carynne and Raymond continued to exchangeughter and conversation inside this space, but it felt as if they were each holding a gun to the others head.


    <i>Tak.</i>


    Setting down the teacup, Raymond stood to his feet.


    Would you like another cup?


    Carynne looked down at the teacup that she hadnt touched yet. Raymond also looked a little awkward as he filled her cup for a second time.


    Hm, nevertheless. Lets have one then, a conversation.


    What happened during that time, how did ite to that?


    What are you talking about?


    As expected, Raymond was being sly. Carynne red at Raymond as he responded with the same tone she had earlier. She was already tired of having to continue hearing this kind of joke.


    Dont feign ignorance. Im talking about Miss Ise.


    Carynne felt the grip of her hand on the teacup tighten.


    How much did he know?


    And, if he did know something, what did he want?


    Why was Raymond different from the Raymond Carynne knew until now?


    She had so many questions. She wanted to grab Raymond by the cor and shake him if she could. It was at times like this that shed grow so angry at the fact that she was a woman. She wanted to use brute force, but she couldnt do that here because men were physically stronger.


    Goodness, I thought this was a secret rendezvous after youve whispered your love to me. Youre just curious about that after all.


    Youre injured.


    Was he seriously still talking nonsense? In the end, Carynne couldnt help but glower.


    If you want, should I take my clothes off?


    I would wee that with open arms No, no, never mind. You dont truly have to take it off.


    Dun would have weed it without any hesitation. Inevitably, this man was brazen when it came to words, but weak-hearted when it came to the decisive part. At least, it was like that whenever it came to Carynne.


    You fought with Miss Ise.


    It wasnt a fight. I took a one-sided beating. You see, its all because you couldnt keep your fiance on a leash


    And your foot?


    Miss Ise stepped on it that night.


    But at the end of that day, wasnt it you who saw Miss Isest? What time did youst see her then?


    What a clumsy leading question. Carynne felt the tension in her body ease up.


    I wasnt thest one who saw her. It was Dun. Why are you pretending as if this is something significant? Its offensive.


    Pretend, you say. Thats funny. Reverend Dun never testified to that.


    What?


    Raymond guffawed exaggeratedly. His voice was strained.


    Haha, that expression, its funny. It looks to me as if you two nned this beforehand.


    No. Wait a minute, youre going too fast. This conversation was much too confusing. Was it a mistake on her part to mention Dun? She hadnt seen him in person since. Borwen came in his stead to deliver his words.


    It was a short message telling her to take care of Ise in the name of atonement. Was that message intercepted in the middle? Was there someone eavesdropping back then? Or did the two men talk without Carynne knowing? Thats usible. Did Dun turn her in? If he confessed, how far was his confession?


    Carynne bowed. Her head was spinning.


    !


    He gripped her shoulder tightly.


    Dont think so hard about it.


    Raymond leaned down, looking straight into Carynnes eyes. The green glint of his eyes was reminiscent of a sharp des glimmer. There was still a curve upon his lips, however it was not a smile.


    Dont think about how much I might know, and dont try to change the subject. Youre not under investigation.


    It wouldnt be in Carynnes best interests to say something like, If you dont have any evidence, then dont dig deeper. She wrung her thoughts for dear life. Raymond was already sure of it. Did he wish to fight with evidence? But was allowed disposition rights. Not only that, but its a problem because if he were to testify in court, then its all over.


    The odds were stacked against Carynne because she didnt know exactly just how much Raymond knew. And first of all, what did he want out of this? Carynne was curious about that. What was this man trying to gain now?


    Sir Raymond. If you already know the answer, then I want to know why youre doing this to me.


    Shh.


    With curved eyes, he smiled. A finger touched Carynnes lips.


    Sir, Raymond.


    I would like to remain courteous to ady.


    But something like courtesy wasnt needed when it came to a criminal.


    These words didnt leave his lips, but Carynne could hear the underlying meaning.

 Chapter 66

    Chapter 66


    Raymond leaned back again, ncing down at Carynne. Heughed as though he truly found it funny. Carynne tried to match him andugh as well, but she couldnt bring herself to.


    Lets think.


    Lets think about Raymond.


    Lets think about Raymond, the one who came back from the war, who loathed Ise and loved Carynne. Lets think of the marksman who suffered from insomnia and always kept poison in his mouth so he could kill himself at any given moment.


    She knew Raymond. Now, she had to make the best offer to grab hold of Raymond. Other than love, what was the most usible thing to present to this man who didnt seem to love her?


    Carynneid down her answer.


    You hate Mister Verdic, dont you.


    The best thing that would work on him for now was this.


    Raymond shrugged and sipped his tea.


    Not exactly. Well my life is held hostage as a mortgage with him. Its not something I find pleasant, but its just like your case. Theres a lot to gain.


    Why am I fighting this war?


    Why am I the only one left alive?


    I loathe him. I loathe everything that he has. Myself, as well.


    Love is the only thing Ive chosen for myself.


    Revenge wasnt enough. It would be difficult to hold onto him with just revenge alone. His loathing was perhaps on a moreprehensive, wider scope. Its what hed like to hear the most. A proposal that would never be rejected.


    Sir Raymond. Its possible to end the war of attrition at the White Mountain Range.


    What are you talking about all of a sudden?


    Mister Verdic Evans is funding the Luthe Duchy.


    Mm Carynne Evans.


    Raymond chucked.


    I dislike people who talk recklessly even as they dont know the whole story.


    His index finger turned to point at Carynnes forehead.


    Dont think too hard.


    Cant we just make Mister Verdic Evans go bankrupt? I loathe that person.


    Carynne gave a usible reason. This reason, too, roused her dried-up loathing.


    He killed me several times. He shed at my neck several times. He purposely used a rusty, blunt axe. Many times, so many times.


    No matter what he thinks, it was because of Mister Verdic that my father offed himself.


    Carynne blinked her eyes at Raymond.


    No matter who I am, and no matter who you are, dont we have one thing inmon?


    Raymonds expression hardened.


    Carynne knew Raymond well. He told her not to think so hard about it, but now that its been said out loud, it wasnt just Raymond who could hold and make the other waver one-sidedly.


    I want to get revenge against Mister Verdic. If theres something youre nning to do with me, then do it after Im done with this.


    Thats what you had wanted.


    The love you gave me must have been that kind of love. A matter of factbecause its only right that youd love me, only right that youd loathe Verdic, only right that you despise Ise. To you, who craved true love, Carynne was a rather fine recipient of that love. Beautiful and pitiful and pure, just as he was to Carynne as well.


    Carynne.


    An answer wasnt urged out of anyone. Raymond paced back and forth in the room for a while. As the sound of his footsteps resounded, he just stared at the ground. Then, he looked at Carynne. Their eyes met.


    I need to give the answer you need, dont I.


    Ha.


    You love me. Just like you said.


    You must be having fun, right?


    Yes, well, when I see any woman, all I see is her face.


    Thats why Ive fallen for you. And thats also why I saved you.


    How nice My face has such powers of persuasion.


    And you love me. Just like you said.


    Yes.


    This was how they confessed their love for each other.


    It was a starry night.


    * * *


    The birds chirping and the bells ringing during mornings were painful to hear.


    Good morning, Mdy.


    Yeah.


    Lady Carynne.


    I got it I got it


    Then please dont bury your face further into your pillow. Please rise from the bed.


    .


    Carynne opened her eyes, pushing down on the urge to cuss. A day like this was what she hated the most. Anger that couldnt be avoided, fatigue that was so abundant that it just ruined her mood, things that she had no control over even if she tried. It was at times like these that Carynne acknowledges she was a human being made of blood and flesh, not pure ink.


    What a profound thought. And Im still half asleep.


    Pardon, Mdy?


    Wouldnt you say that its counterproductive for a human to have a body?


    Huh?


    I wonder why humans get born, only to work, get exhausted, then die.


    Mdy Please wake up.


    Fine.


    Carynnes face was wiped by the soaked towel in Donnas hands. Shes so sleepy that she felt like shes about to die. She was exhausted every single day because she had to do so much worktely.


    If I just die.


    Mdy. You do know that maids like me get up one hour earlier, right?


    Carynne looked at Donna as though she couldnt believe what the maid just said, but then she soon sighed deeply. Its obvious how much weaker Carynne waspared to Donna. Whether it was physically or mentally.


    Just let me whine for a bit. Ive been really tired these days.


    Yeees. Please go ahead and eat your breakfast.


    Seriously


    Carynne opened her eyes.


    The light of the blue daybreak filled the room. Then, a feeling of sadness seeped in from out of nowhere.


    This is all because of Sir Raymond. Im always tired at this time of the year. Ive never ever beenfortable in Verdics house. And this, Raymonds adding to the burden rather than helping me. Hes making things more difficult.


    Carynne had lost all her strength.


    Ugh, cold.


    When Donna opened the window, a chilly breeze blew in. Donna was flustered as Carynne, wearing only a thin nightgown, folded into herself.


    Should I close the window?


    No, I need to stay awake. Ill eat breakfast with the window open.


    Yes, Mdy.


    Donna pushed the trolley in. It was the kind of luxury that Carynne wouldnt have ever seen while she was just Isesdy-in-waiting. She should be satisfied with this.


    With this thought, Carynne nced down at the breakfast feast. It was breakfast, but whaty before her was avish meal.


    The thick pancakes topped with maple syrup were surprisingly soft. The te was also apparently heated on purpose, and as a result, the pancakes were still warm, its taste harmonizing with the still-melting butter.


    There were many other things to eat besides the pancakes as well. There wererge blueberry scones, which looked to be freshly baked, then there were also slices of crisp toast, which were covered with fruit jam.


    Ill gain weight.


    Please take even just one bite of each.


    How about you?


    If Mdy has any left-over food, thats what Ill have.


    Okay


    O-Oh, no, its fine if you eat everything, Mdy! The Evans household doesnt seem to be frugal when ites to food.


    Really?


    Carynne wondered whats differentpared to her memories. If thats what Donna was going to eat, was the household actually generous with their servants? She could remember always just eating small portions of tasteless meals. Theyre all leftovers and coarse food.


    Yes. They feed us well Its the other things that are difficult.


    They used to be so stingy though.


    Huh? How do you know that, Mdy?


    Never mind. Its just, I heard it somewhere.


    Where and how did the story change? Carynne looked down at her breakfast. Its not the taste she had to worry about now, but the quantity.


    For a poor family, such a feast wouldst them a week. Besides the food, there was also a selection of drinks for hermilk, two kinds of juice, lemonade or hot tea.


    I never thought Id ever be served such a meal.


    This was the meal of the Evans households daughter. And shed just take a bite or two out of this luxurious meal. Even though she was tasked with nursing Ise, her meals, her clothes and even the bed she slept on were all so opulent.


    I should be satisfied with this, yeah.


    Carynne poured some milk into her tea and walked towards the window. The morning mist rose faintly.

 Chapter 67

    Chapter 67


    The Evans familys vi was located in the outskirts of the capital. Compared to the town where the Hare manor was located, it couldnt bepared to this evidently extravagant town.


    ncing down, a pet swan could be seen gliding leisurely across theke, and at the edge of the waters, white horses were taking a drink.


    Oh my, is that Sir Knight over there?


    Carynne forced a smile as she waved one hand. She just wanted to ignore him. But Raymond saw her first and waved a hand to her, so it couldnt be helped.


    I knew it. It was a lie when he said that he felt hesitant towards horses that hes never seen before.


    It made meugh seeing him pat the backs of the horses that obviously belong to the Evans family.


    What do you mean, Mdy? Donna asked.


    Sir Raymond told me that hes too shy to mount a horse hes never seen before.


    Huuh? Pff Whats with that!


    Thats why he insisted on riding the carriage with me back then.


    Donnas mouth gaped open.


    Oh my gosh, <i>oh my gosh</i>, thats totally its <i>that.</i>


    Right?


    Its like that.


    Carynne drank her cup of milk tea. It was sweet because there was sugar mixed in it, but still subtly bitter because the tea might have been steeped too long.


    * * *


    Carynne was busy in her day to day life. She took care of Ise during the day, then suffered because of how Raymond tormented her during the night. These dismal days continued on.


    Thats why its like that these days. Its a ce full of hardships.


    Carynne talked as she changed the dirty clothes. They smelled bad.


    I didnt know Id ever have to attend to you like this.


    I cant believe I have to wear this in the end.


    Carynne sighed self-deprecatingly as she nced down at what shes wearinga maids uniform that was made of rough cloth. The white apron, which was draped over the dark navy, thin maids uniform, was soaked with sweat dripping over. The weather was cool in the early mornings, but it was still very much in the middle of summer.


    As she was in the middle of changing Ises IV and its needle, she took out a new set.


    Ack!


    Blood sttered over her apron. Carynne pressed her fingertip hard. She must be really tired.


    I cant use this, huh.


    Carynne threw the needle away.


    * * *


    Why the long face? Raymond asked.


    Mister Verdic scolded me for wasting a needle.


    That must be so heartbreaking.


    Dontugh.


    Sorry.


    But the knights expression continued to be jovial. Annoyed, Carynne thumped the ground with the cane in her hand. It might not be needed inside the house, but she still needed to hold a cane whenever she went out.


    When will you recover fully?


    Who knows. Ive never had this kind of injury before.


    Wouldnt it be better to have the Reverend look at it?


    I forgot. Truly.


    As Carynne stared at Raymond with chagrin, Raymond raised his hands in surrender.


    Haa.


    Mdy, youre scheduled to attend a charity concert at the Elliot Hall today.


    I hate this. Theres a lot of stairs in that ce.


    Carynne couldnt help but scowl. That hall with endless stairs was torture for Carynne as she still needed a cane to walk.


    Youve been there?


    I just heard about it.


    When asked if shes been to the ce, she couldnt possibly say, Yes, Ive been there. Even so, Raymond was persistent.


    From whom?


    From the fairies of the streets.


    How very mysterious.


    Right? Lets just go then.


    While Carynne was about to get into the carriage, Raymond carried her up.


    Im tired.


    Carynnes routine during the day was strictly regted by Verdic himself, and then she spent her nights with Raymond. There were so many ces she had to visit while apanying him as his fiance.


    Where do we have to go tomorrow?


    Tomorrow, its a recital held by Duke Dalton. Hes releasing a personalposition.


    I see.


    Yes.


    Anything else youd like to talk about?


    Crossing his legs, Raymond smirked.


    How are you going to do it?


    Haa.


    To prove that what youre saying is true.


    Its not the right time yet.


    Thats a good excuse.


    Im telling you, there really isnt much going on right now. This ce is a ce full of hardships.


    I could never get used to pain. I could never grow familiar to torture.


    Its all the more distressing.


    Proving ones own usefulness was required every single day.


    Verdic used her as ady in waiting during the day, and at night, he used her and forced her into the role of Ises substitute. On top of all that, Raymond was also already giving her a hard time, and youre asking her if its alright to add one more thing? Smiling like that, adding another burden to her like that.


    I want to kill him.


    No.


    I want to die.


    Theres nothing substantial during this period. Working day and night like this until the year would end was just for naught.


    In the original story, the plot in this period of time would center around the hardships of the main character, during which she underwent ordeals to garner sympathy from Raymond and high society. And at the same time, it was also the period in which budding love was fostered step by step.


    Time flew by just like that, and Raymond gradually worked towards Verdics downfall.


    To be honest, Mister Verdic or whoever else is none of my concern.


    Carynne gnashed her teeth. Right now, Carynne just wanted to throw everything away, be it Raymond, Verdic, the war or the mining rights. There were so many troublesome things riddled around her that she didnt have time to work on just her own story. Like with how she had to spend time with Ise, like with how she had to go down to the circus against her own will.


    I want to just quit everything!


    Was there any way for her to do so?


    Several times a day, Carynne had to fight the urge to press down a pillow over Ises face. She didnt expect her patience to be this thin.


    Carynne desperately endured this time like this, but unlike her, Carynne was not very patient. Its only been a span of a few pages, and yet Raymond was already prodding at Carynne like this.


    Oh my It hasnt been long since my confession to you, has it? Things are progressing much too fast.


    I see people wearing bracelets more than rings these days.


    Are you fond of silver bracelets? he asked.


    So, prove your usefulness.


    Raymondughed. Carynne wanted to drive a bullet into his face.


    Even if you say that, its not like theres anything I can do now.


    Hahaha.


    Her expression was sour. Carynne gripped the cane handle and leaned back against the carriage seat. Hes getting on her nerves.


    Fine. Ill show you one useful thing.


    Raymond ced a finger on his chin and asked.


    Will you be putting on a performance?


    They arrived at the music hall, and as expected, the stairs were mountainous. She held Raymonds hand as she alighted the carriage, then she answered.


    Not today.


    Im seriously so tired.


    And, true enough, Carynne slept deeply during the concert. She slept so soundly that she couldnt wake up until Raymond tapped her on the shoulder when the performance was over.


    * * *


    You seem to be in a good mood these days, sir.


    Xenon remarked as he handed Raymond a bullet.


    As his engagement was shifted from Ise Evans to Carynne Evans, Raymonds countenance had changed strikingly. To Xenon, it seemed like Raymond had beenughing and smiling more in these recent dayspared to thest decade.


    Raymond spent time with Carynne every day. They were called to go to many ces. Raymond didnt turn any invitation down and went to them with Carynne. Its as if he didnt care what theyre going to do, as long as he could spend time with her.


    <i>Click.</i>


    No way.


    It really seems like it.


    However, without Carynne by his side, he reverted back to the way he once was.


    Xenon decided to think that this was what it looked like to be a man in love. Without her, he was no different, or at the very least, he seemed to talk less.


    A man whos fallen in love turns into a fool.

 Chapter 68

    Chapter 68


    So Xenon, youre calling me stupid now, arent you? Why dont you go ahead and call me Little Ray.


    I was presumptuous.


    Still, dont be so discouraged at your elerating age since Shh.


    <i>Click.</i>


    Raymond loaded the gun.


    <i>BANG!</i>


    The birds wings loudly pped as they flew away. <i>Thud.</i> The prey fell. It was a huge stagits antlers were magnificent.


    I missed. Im getting rusty.


    But didnt you hit it?


    It wasnt an instant death Now, its just unnecessarily in pain.


    Itll die after youve shot it anyway. Why does that matter when itll eventually be meat that will be eaten?


    Ive really gone rusty.


    Raymond muttered to himself. He was preupied with thoughts other than the deer. Xenon could guess what it was.


    Isnt this the first time youre seeing a proper woman, sir? Hehe, all the girls youve been stuck with until now, and then theres Lady Ise. Theyve all been no joke, really.


    Proper woman?


    Raymond repeated Xenons words.


    Im talking about Lady Carynne.


    Haha.


    Raymond turned to face Xenon. He looked at the other man squarely in the eyes. Then, there was a smile on his marvelous features. Evidently, it was not the same bright smile that he would show to Carynne.


    I-Is that not the case?


    Did he make a mistake? Xenon broke out in cold sweat. He couldnt get a read on Raymondhe was always a decent superior, a decent aristocrat. But was that truly how he was?


    If thats how you see it, well I guess youre right.


    I apologize.


    I didnt mean to be angry. Im just doing my best, is what Im saying. Her, too.


    The two men approached the fallen deer. It was still breathing. The gasping deers big eyes was somehow burdening. Xenon took out a dagger.


    I knew it, its still breathing.


    Let me deal with it, sir.


    No, let me. Its my fault.


    Yes, sir.


    Raymond approached the gasping dear and hugged its head. He held it close to his body, then he whispered.


    Shh good boy.


    <i>Craaack.</i>


    With a deer that size, arge amount of force would have been needed to do it in, but it took little effort on Raymonds part to break the deers neck. The animals eyes rolled up, and after it convulsed for a few moments, it soon gradually settled down.


    Its fur and antlers are in a pretty good condition. Its head could even be used as a decoration.


    While appraising the deers antlers, Raymond asked.


    Xenon, is a deer head a good gift?


    Do you mean for Mister Verdic?


    Raymond had already given that man so many things, so what else was he trying to give? Xenon felt disgusted just thinking about Verdics greedy smile.


    These days, Verdic was obsessed with eating, and his personality was getting even filthier by the day. Xenon didnt want Raymond to bow to him. That man wasnt worth any respect.


    The meat should be enough for him.


    So was he saying that hes going to cut this deers head and present it to his frail fiance? Xenon shook his head. As expected, hes still young, so he didnt know the ways of the world.


    I dont think thats a good idea. Fox fur might be a better gift.


    The antlers are this huge though.


    But its not fitting as a gift for a youngdy. How about doing the same as you did before just like with Lady Ise? It would be enough to go to a jewelry store and choose the most expensive item there. Or if its the most popr design, just give a bouquet of flowers along with it, then itll be perfect.


    Raymond tilted his head to the side. For some reason, he looked young at that very moment, so Xenonughed. This clumsy side of him made him look a bit more human.


    I thought shed like this kind of thing.


    Please dont give that.


    Hes been good at picking out presents and good at acting ording to etiquette thus far, but why was he doing such things for Carynne? Could this kind of behavior also be attributed to him being in love? Xenon wasnt like this when he was younger. He scratched his head.


    Seems like youve really fallen in love, sir.


    It should be like that. So.


    Laughing strangely, whispering to one another and allowing her to get hurt?


    Xenon shook his head and erased the fleeting thought from his mind. A squire must not have any doubts about his master. And Raymond had never let him down before. Surely enough, hes thinking of everything.


    Shall I send a telegram back to the estate? Once you get married, the Lady would no longer be part of the Evans household.


    Mm Right. Thats bound to happen over time.


    His Lordship the Baron is ill, so he would be looking forward to your marriage, Lord Raymond.


    That person? Im not so sure about that.


    Its because of your siblings, sir.


    Awkwardly, Raymond swept a hand over his face. Then, he stroked his chin.


    Goodness, sir, it really seems like youve truly fallen for her. But it''s better to be more forthright with women, it wouldnt do you any good to wait or hesitate. If you act like a man


    You said its better to be forthright.


    Yes, sir.


    As Raymond continued to contemte, he also looked as if he was feeling a bit awkward, so Xenon turned his head to the side. Damn, he took it too far. As he looked away, he saw the horses tied to a tree some distance away. Its going to be troublesome to go back that way.


    But sir, why did youe all the way out here to hunt? Weve gone a long way.


    The hunting grounds they were in right now was quite far from the Evans familys vi. It was summer, so the deer were heavier these days. Even so, this ce wasnt a particrly good spotpared to the hunting grounds near the vi.


    Why on earth did he choose toe here? Raymond kept talking about iprehensible things while Xenon over here thought that he was giving some love advice.


    Tired of walking on eggshells, Xenon sighed andined to Raymond.


    Well have to lug this back such a long way ahead, but the amount of money its worth wouldnt cut it.


    And, only one deer was caught. Xenon swallowed back thesest words. Having only hunted this much, this was a disastrous turnout for Raymond. He woke up at the crack of dawn to go hunting today, and he went from this ce to that ce all day as well.


    Theres something I need to confirm.


    Raymond continued to walk through the woods, stepping on the grass as he carried his rifle with him. It seemed like he was looking for something, but he wouldnt say what it was.


    Xenon agonized over the reason why he was here all day. Was this, too, something that happened when a man falls in love?


    Is this rted to the Lady? <i>Huk.</i>


    Xenon stopped breathing.


    As soon as the fishy smell in the air hit him, he saw it.


    However, it wasnt a prey that Xenons master had caught beforehand. IT was a red-headed woman, lying on the ground.


    Neither Xenon nor Raymond drew in closer than a certain distanceeven if they went closer, the woman was already far beyond saving. The smell of blood was strong, but the smell that permeated the air wasnt just its metallic smell. It smelled disgustingly rotten.


    It was a dead body.


    Urk.


    It smells terrible. How long do you think its been?


    At least three days, sir? A doctor should be consulted, but I believe it hasnt been more than three days.


    I see.


    Raymond approached the corpse cautiously, then using his gun, he flipped over the womans body.


    <i>Wriggle.</i>


    T-That


    Calm down, Xenon.


    The womans mouth was ripped open. This was obviously a case of murder. Her eyeballs were also gone. Her clothes were soaked entirely of blood. Of course, it was because her stomach was alsopletely torn open.


    <i>Wriggle.</i>


    The corpses mouth dragged open.


    W-What?


    Through the corpses mouth, a squeak could be heard, and a mouse popped right out.


    <i>Fwick.</i>


    Raymond picked up a rock and threw it at the mouse. The mouse screeched out as it died. It seemed to have devoured the womans tongue.


    Xenons stomach turned.


    Xenon, hand me your notebook.


    The hell, this


    Calm down. Its what weve always seen.


    But that was.


    That was on the battlefield, not here. This should be a peaceful ce.


    But the scariest thing was


    Ah.


    its as if Raymond already knew that the corpse wasying here.


    Why the hell did the knight in front of hime to this ce? What did he know?


    Xenon, what was it that you said earlier?


    P-Pardon me?


    About Miss Carynne Evans.


    Y-Yes.


    Raymond slung his gun on his back again. This action alone made Xenon realize that Raymond was looking for <i>this</i> all along.


    But then, the most unexpected words left Raymonds lips.


    Seems like Im in love.


    It, it seems so.


    While packing up the deer, Raymond spoke to Xenon.


    So, let me be forthright. Donte anywhere near her.


    Xenon might have joked and said, Will you be jealous, sir? but then the expression on the mans face would not have made it possible.

 Chapter 69: Queen of spades

    Chapter 69: Queen of spades


    <strong>Chapter 69</strong>


    <strong>01. Queen of spades</strong>


    Its not even going to be seen anyway.


    Even parts that couldnt be seen should be prettied up, Mdy.


    But even on my toes is a bit,


    She hadnt eaten since dawn. And whats this now.


    Carynnes foot itched, so she kept wriggling her toes. The manicurist wrapped her feet in a warm towel. She should be more attentive during Duke Daltons recital. It wasnt because this was important for  Carynne , but because its important for an  Evans . The manicurist that Verdic sent to Carynne looked at her toes as if it was an impossible job.


    Shall I coat your toenails with some gold dust? Or would just a transparent coating be alright?


    Coating her toenails with gold was of course nice. Its very luxurious. Even if she treaded through filth all day long, her feet would eventually be covered in gold at night.


    She went through such magical transformations every day, and it was making her head hurt. Next to her, Donna fanned Carynne as she stared at her with envy.


    Carynne used to be the one standing in the maids ce. Then, would Donna be the main characterter?


    Sheughed as she imagined it.


    Lady Evans?


    Use the gold coating.


    What decorations shall I ce on the goldyer?


    Whats avable?


    Small diamonds can be ced on it. If not, we have rubies, too.


    Wouldnt her feet just hurt? Carynne was somewhat apprehensive. Her foot still hadnt healed. Its difficult enough just putting on shoes.


    The top of her foot was dented with a fracture, but how strange was it that gems would be ced on her toes.


    Wouldnt it go under my shoes anyway, so whats the use?


    Once again, Mdy, things that couldnt be seen should be taken care of. This way, you can be a true Lady.


    So <i>you </i>know better than <i>I </i>do?


    You wont even answer anymore.


    Did Ise do this all the time? When Carynne was herdy-in-waiting, she saw Ise being dressed and dolled up, but it seemed like she was so used to it, as if ordering people around was both a hobby and an everyday routine.


    Carynne also enjoyed all sorts of luxury whenever she was Raymond or some other noblemans lover, but she was never as tired as she was now as a member of the Evans household. During some other time, she could do whatever she wanted. Living as a freeloader was hard.


    Am I being looked down on because Im adopted?


    What do you mean, Mdy?


    Seems like Ive be tired. Its probably because of my age, but I cant soften my words, they juste out barbed. I should have slept a lot in advance.


    Carynne sighed. She rubbed her eyes, which were drooping with exhaustion.


    While embellishing your toes, it might be good to ce a face mask on you.


    Wouldnt it be better if you all just take care of it since you know <i>so</i> much?


    So that she could at least sleep a little more during that time. However, the custodians employed by House Evans were unmoved.


    We dont know better. Only the master decides upon everything.


    Is that so?


    Carynne found the custodians words to be interesting as she lectured her about their masters attitude. These were the women who Carynne had managed to get along well with when she herself had been ady-in-waiting.


    All the women here were people whoforted each other and drank together because they were so worn out by having to deal with Ises irritability and bad temper. But now it was so different, just because her position had changed.


    I see.


    Still, that didnt mean that she intended to do anything about this.


    Carynne felt weak and deted. She just wanted to sleep more right now. But that simple wish was soon shattered when another person, a skincare specialist, had ced a mask of herbs on her face.


    Its cold.


    Its a bit dark under your eyes. I believe we need to do a bit more work here.


    Kay.


    Carynne remembered who this skincare specialist was. Her names Jane, maybe? She liked drinking liquor, and she had this theory that alcohol was good for the skin. Shes been in the industry for a while now and shes made a name for herself, so she also received a shop from Verdic that she would manage.


    Your skin is rough and your hair is red Would you consider wearing a wig?


    People were so amusing. Looking at the woman who was so obviously trying to put Carynne in check, she weaklyughed at the woman.


    Should I feed her poisonter? Oh, but in this house, Verdic and Raymond would surely find out right away. How should I y now? There are so many people here.


    Can you be more careful with that mouth of yours?


    Donna pursed her lips and snapped at Jane.


    Youre very eager, too, arent you.


    Among the maids in Verdics vi, its clear that the maids under Carynnesuch as Donna and Serawere being trampled over. The maids originally dont even have toe from the Evans household either.


    Carynne felt a bit responsible for this, and a little guilty. The male attendants went to Dun as chains, but most of the maids were fired while only a few that were close to Carynne were re-hired by the Evans family. However, since they were a surplus of staff that werent needed in the first ce, they needed to work hard while walking on eggshells in order to prove their worth.


    Is this a maid youve brought from your previous home?


    The custodian asked without even looking at Donnas face. Theres no way she didnt know, but she pretended anyway. Its been a while since Carynne came to this house, but this woman was being childish.


    Yeah.


    Among all thedies-in-waiting that Ive seen thus far, shes the most inane of all. A child like that originally wouldnt have been ady-in-waiting at all.


    Donnas face flushed bright red.


    W-What did you say? Now look here!


    Stop, stop.


    Carynne sighed and waved one hand.


    Im so terribly tired. If I can just seriously focus on one thing at a time, one story at a time, then please. Raymond alone is enough of a headache, so dont involve me in some maids quarrel. And theres nothing that she can do for me either.


    Mdy!


    Donnas face flushed even redder.


    Im seriously so sleepy to the point of death. Nobody wake me up until Sir Raymondes. I really should not be tired today.


    But the custodian made a face.


    But Lady Evans, after this dont you have to take care of Lady Evans I mean, the real Lady Evans?


    Donna cried out in a fit.


    Let Lady Carynne rest a little. Im going to tell the housekeeper about this!


    What an exemry maid. But Carynne knew that her outburst was of little use. Carynne wanted to give Donna a little more money, but she didnt have any money in the first ce. Its all Verdics money. After everythings set and done, should she slip the maid some money? Now that she thought about it though, how had Donna been faring until now?


    Lady Evans. That woman doesnt seem to have enough knowledge about nursing someone back to health. And the master said that you, Lady Carynne Evans, must definitely do it yourself.


    Sighing, Carynne took off her gown. And, she soon wore clothes made from coarse fabric, which was what maids usually wore. Shed be wearing a fancy dress again at night, but not right now.


    Sure.


    Youre all going to die.


    * * *


    Im curious, what on earth are you going to show me?


    Before that, you have topliment my dress.


    I admire your good taste every single day.


    Actually, they had all been picked by experts and professionals. Carynne wasnt even in the right mind to choose anything for herself.


    Just the dress?


    Raymond waggled his eyebrows. Looking at his face like that made it difficult for her to hold back either mirth or ire. They had to act like a couple.


    Beside them, Donna looked at them with a face that seemed to say goosebumps were rising over her skin. It seemed like theyre being told to y it up for the audience.


    Raymond raised one hand of Carynnes and kissed it.


    Beautiful. As always is what Id like to say, but you seem to be very tired.


    Really? Donna.


    Donna, who had a simrly exhausted countenance beside her, swiftly handed over an item. While what he said was romantic, its worth making a fuss now because, since she was being worked to the bone, she was worried about how tired she looked.


    Was that truly how she looked? Carynne knew that she <i>had</i> to be beautiful. Its alright for a maid to be a little ugly, but wasnt her face her most effective weapon?


    But look, he said its not a little but very. Was he saying that her dark eyebags could still be seen from all this makeup?


    Here you go, Mdy.


    Carynne hurriedly took the hand mirror and looked at her reflection. But her makeup was perfect. The countrys best experts made sure that it was, every single day. So theres no big problem here.


    She knew how to objectively evaluate her own appearance. She was as beautiful as she ever was.


    What are you talking about then?

 Chapter 70

    Chapter 70


    With annoyance evident upon her face, Carynne red at Raymond, who spoke up as though to defend himself.


    Its not a problem with your makeup, but with your countenance. Your shoulders are tense. And your voice is too strident.


    That kind of problem then. Shrugging, Carynne handed the hand mirror back to Donna. A problem like this wasnt a big problem at all.


    I drank too much coffee so that I wont fall asleep. Im fine. This much is nothing.


    It might be better if you just go in and rest. Or would you rather go to the recital and go back home right away? If you wont be able to see the oue properly, itll be for naught.


    Being considerate now, arent we.


    Carynne had to try not to sound sarcastic.


    But please dont worry.


    Carynne lifted the hem of her dress skirt and smiled.


    If youre someone whos taken a glimpse of the exams answer sheet in advance, then you wouldnt be afraid of the results.


    A gambler who knew their opponents cards would not hesitate to bet their money.


    You can look forward to it. You know, I actually know how to do magic.


    * * *


    Catherine?


    She looked the same as she did back then. Beautiful, as always. Elegant. With bright red hair that would vividly catch ones eye. Her appearance was exactly the same.


    The roses of June, the verdure of summer, a fairy, a queen. Regardless of what kind of description you attach to her, it wouldnt matter. Nothing would be awkward with a woman like her.


    Just as she always did, she drew near him and smiled a kind, gentle smile. If it hadnt been for the man next to her, then Ein would havemitted a mistake.


    Its been a while, Baron Ein.


    The splendid young man who had blond hair reached out to him for a handshake. And it was only when he felt the grip of the young man did Eine back to his senses.


    Sir Raymond, its been quite a while. I got it now, so let go. My hand hurts, yeah?


    Oh my.


    The redheaded beauty covered her lips with her hands and giggled. Ein felt a wave of shame wash over him. A woman at her age would now be considered as his daughter.


    She then greeted Ein, who was now slightly depressed.


    Ive heard many people tell me that I resemble my mother. I am Catherine Evans, a pleasure.


    Ah, ahh. I, I see. Then the rumors.


    Ein was conscious of the eyes watching from around them. Hes sweating. Ah, shit. Whats this. That cant be true. A long time has passed. Im <i>that</i> old now. Even if there was a lighthearted, joking atmosphere around them, he was at the age that hed receive much scorn if he so much as looked at her with a hint of desire.


    They look alike, dont they? I was surprised too when I first met her.


    I see, Lady Elva.


    Didnt you doze off during the recital?


    What are you saying. The poems that the Duke wrote himself were excellent. Compared tost time, of course. But for you to say that, what are you doing here alone, Countess?


    Baron Ein and the ck-haired countess. These two were old acquaintances. Adversaries for a long time, yet on the same side every now and again. If it hadnt been for amon hobby tying them together, they wouldnt have met each other.


    These two were gambling addicts.


    The difference was that Elva had a huge bankruptcy recently, while Ein never fell to such depths.


    Still, they were not the same. Just now, Ein pointed out that Missus Elva did note here without her daughter and husband. It was not very bing for a married woman to go to ces all by herself. A married man was different from a married woman.


    My husband, well my daughter was sick, so I came alone.


    But then you still came here?


    <i>Even though your child is sick.</i>


    Elvas expression grew a bit stiff.


    Oh my, is it severe?


    Towards the countess, whose face was rapidly turning red, Carynne expressed her worries. And without missing this opportunity, Countess Elva quickly changed the subject.


    Carynne, will youe visit our residenceter? She said that she wishes to see you.


    Of course. I hope she gets well soon. When would be a good time for me to visit?


    Ill send you a telegram soon. Youre so sweet, just like your mother.


    Were you acquainted with my mother?


    I believe Baron Ein knows her better than I do though?


    Truly? Do you know her well?


    The girl smiled at him with innocent eyes. Ein wrapped one hand over another. Carynne, who looked exactly like her mother, seemed so far removed from the world of gambling.


    I did not know her very well.


    Oh, youre only pretending not to know. I remember you chasing her around a lot? Well, not as much as Crown Prince Gueuze, but I recall you being pretty persistent, too.


    Countess Elva cut into the conversation and guffawed. The more that woman grew old, the more she wouldnt let herself stay just inside the house, and now shes sticking her nose up in all sorts of ces. Shit.


    Ein replied awkwardly.


    That was when I was still young. In the same way, there wasnt a man back then who hadnt chased after Catherine.


    There was no man out there who would refuse beauty. But among those men, Ein was someone who quickly epted reality. Compared to a morous woman like Catherine, weing just a simple woman who hadnt that much presence as his wife was what would satisfy the self-esteem of a man such as himself and bring him happiness. And his choice wasnt so bad.


    Indeed, she was extremely pretty. Its a shame, Carynne. Raymond is fine enough as he is of course, but even from olden times, a woman tended to have numerous men around her to choose from.


    Oh my, I know right.


    Carynne burst out into a peal ofughter together with her. On the other hand, Raymonds expression hardened, but it was only a harmless joke. He soon grinned and ced Carynnes arm on his to show off.


    Im right here next to you. Youre too mean.


    Oh my, Sir Raymond. I know that you must be happy. If Carynne had made her debut like Catherine did, you would have received at least ten duel challenges by now.


    Curiously, Carynne asked Countess Elva.


    Did Father win any duels?


    Your father was very much wiser, Carynne. What he offered was neither a gun nor money, but his smile. Baron Ein knows this all too well.


    And right then, displeasure surged within Baron Ein.


    I do not agree with that, Elva.


    Elva cked her fan open and covered her mouth with it, covering her expression that clearly said, <i>got you.</i>


    If its like that, I shouldnt say anything more. Carynne, ask Baron Ein more about your motherter. Hell have <i>much</i> to say.


    This woman.


    As the air around them froze, the young man and young woman nced over to one side and the other. If this had been the back alley, Baron Ein and Countess Elva looked as if they would have already shot each other in the head right where they stood.


    In the end, Raymond began to put things back to order.


    Then Im lucky. For winning Carynnes love peacefully, I mean. If there are a lot of men like Baron Ein around, Id lose confidence.


    Oh you, Sir Raymond. Gosh.


    Haha, Sir Raymond. So you know a thing or two yourself. But you know, my type of woman isnt Catherine anymore either. Youll find out as well. A womans beautiful appearancests only during her prime.


    Carynne is beautiful not only because of her face Shes perfect.


    S-Stop it, Sir Raymond.


    Carynne clung tighter to Raymonds arm to stop him from boasting. That kind ofpliment embarrassed even the other people around them, and she didnt know why she was feeling bashful for some reason.


    Its just that you dont know it yet, so


    Baron Ein trailed off. Ultimately, if he were to defend his stance here, he would only undermine Catherine. And this thereby would insult both Carynne and Raymond. Damn, I cant say anything more.


    Pfft.


    Seeing this, Countess Elva snickered, but he didnt react to this because this was the truth. Ah, what a headache.


    And this girl?


    Shes my maid. But shes be ady-in-waiting recently.


    I see.


    Now thats better. Eins gaze turned towards the timid maid beside the dazzling Carynne. She had a girlish charm to her, and with a magnificent mansion as the backdrop, it was refreshing to see that kind of shyness. The older he got, the more gorgeous a girl like her became in his eyes.


    Ugh.


    Perhaps she noticed what kind of gaze Ein had for her. Her face grew red as she looked away.


    Haha.


    He preferred women who were moderately shy. Not someone like Countess Elva, who was a gambling addict, under the impression that she was some great woman.

 Chapter 71

    Chapter 71


    Baron Ein?


    Huh?


    Carynne called Ein as he was imagining all sorts of things in his head.


    Was my mother truly that famous?


    Thats right


    Did you like her, too, Baron?


    Baron Ein, congrattions on the birth of your son. I saw it in the newspapers the other day.


    You saw that? Haha, Im a little embarrassed. My wife is already quite old.


    It was a rude question to ask a married man who was also already a father. When Raymond intervened, this was enough to make Carynne realize, and so her face turned red.


    Ah Im very sorry!


    Its alright.


    It would just be awkward for the baron to get angry now. Time had passed, and right now, that womans daughter was already beyond the age that the woman had made her social debut in the past.


    Still, its fortunate that this mistake was made in front of Ein. Any other of that womans suitors wouldnt have been sensitive about the time that had passed. But since Ein had be ill-tempered as he grew old, he couldnt help the urge to grumble.


    Well,pared to me, Crown Prince Gueuze was more famous. Once he sees you, I dont know but he might like you.


    Turning the conversation away from herself, Carynne asked.


    Crown Prince Gueuze Did His Highnesse today?


    Recitals arent exactly his cup of tea.


    Do you know about the Crown Prince, Baron? Raymond asked.


    How about you, Sir Raymond?


    Ive been on the frontlines for quite some time, however.


    Raymonds expression hardened a little. Its understandable, of course. But if hes just going to get caught like that, then its no fun.


    Fortunately, Countess Elva intervened at that moment.


    He is the epitome of nobility. Hes unlike any other.


    Quite so.


    Whatever Crown Prince Gueuze did with the lower half of his body and whatever his hobbies were, these werent the things that the noblewomen truly knew. Ein tried to stop himself fromughing at Countess Elvas evaluation. It was a mans allegiance.


    The question now was thiswould Raymond stop his fiance? With Carynne standing in front of him like this, her eyes glistening with curiosity, he couldnt get rid of the chills running down his back as he looked at her. He knew that it would be the same with Crown Prince Gueuze.


    When will I be able to meet him?


    Carynne.


    Yes?


    Raymond pulled Carynnes arm slightly. Ah, what a shame. Ein chuckled inwardly. Hed have to give a little nudge here. Ein wanted to send a small gift to his old rival.


    Theres one seat open in the noble council. That would be a nice gift.


    Well, how about this.


    Huh?


    y a game with me. Im bored today, you know. If you beat me, Ill take you to him.


    Baron Ein.


    Raymond spoke in a low voice, but the baron was looking at only Carynne.


    What if I lose?


    <i>What if </i>you<i> win?</i>


    Einughed. Taking her there was something he wanted, so why would he win? In any case, win or lose, Carynne was going to stand in front of the crown prince.


    You, well I dont know.


    Ein saw Carynnes colorful essories. She was dressed to the nines as though she was unting how she was part of the Evans household.


    Maybe we can bet just a little money Let me see. Here, shall we start with this coin?


    Ein took out one silver coin. It didnt seem like much.


    Okay! Thats great.


    What exactly was great about this? Ein scanned Carynnes expression, then looked towards the maid behind her.


    Carynne, gambling isnt good.


    Hm, a-hem.


    Countess Elva coughed. When it was mentioned that gambling wasnt good, she stared pointedly at Raymond. However, as the young man felt the countess gaze, he suggested the next best option.


    Ill do it for you if you wish.


    Goodness, Raymond, what are you saying now? Youll substitute and gamble instead?


    Shes still young.


    But Carynne pushed Raymond to the side and stepped forward, looking excited.


    Its alright Sir Raymond. Im good at ying card games.


    Ohh, how cool. In this new era, we need more women like you, Carynne.


    Ein weed the newbie with open arms.


    * * *


    How?


    Baron Ein looked at the card in front of him.


    There was a red queen of spades.


    The game is over.


    A servant of the dukes mansion announced the end of the game with a low voice. The game ended because there was a gap of 200 points.


    You talked big earlier though.


    Someone snickered.


    Oh my goodness


    Countess Elva let out a baffled exmation.


    W-What do we do, Mdy.


    The maid bemoaned.


    This


    Do Donna. What do we do?


    Flustered, Carynne stammered back at the maid.


    Tears, sighs and frowns followed after this. The two girls were on the brink of tears. Those nervous faces evoked sorrow to anyone whod see them, but Ein just nkly looked at the cards. Even still, it seemed like its just a dream. This result.


    Carynne lost.


    Haa.


    Raymond brought a white gloved hand over to his forehead. Although, he did seem rather relieved a little. Themotion centered around Carynne quietly spread through the hall.


    Sighs andughter meandered through the air. Some sneers were directed at Carynne, but most of them were towards Baron Ein. The people of Carynnes age seemed to be having fun with this situation, but the middle-aged noble men and womenespecially those who had lost money to Einlooked at the baron with cold eyes.


    I cant believe he wheedled such a fortune from a seventeen-year-olddy.


    Isnt that just too much?


    I cant stand to see it anymore.


    Ein, a man in his forties, was a famous gambler. Considering who he was, it was shameless how he tricked the youngdy into participating in the card game. Even if she was the daughter of Catherine, who Ein had chased after during the days of their youth. What did he stand with winning against the seventeen-year-old, debutant-aged Carynne?


    Baron Ein is truly so mean.


    I know, he really is.


    Elva fanned herself with satisfaction. Even though Carynne had lost a great deal of money here, it was still just a miniscule amount considering the huge wealth of the Evans household. So, Countess Elva consoled Carynne casually yet also joined in on the criticism against Baron Ein. She was enjoying every second of it.


    How is it? Delighted that you earned some money?


    I


    Ein vacantly looked down at the cards. Whispers rang through his ears.


    Ein could not understand.


    Why?


    Ein won.


    But hes certain that he was on the verge of losing.


    * * *


    You said youd show me a magic trick.


    Did I not live up to your expectations?


    Thats right.


    Well, Im sorry to have disappointed you.


    Carynne jumped and sat on the railing of a balcony, then she leaned back. The evening sky of summer was beautifully radiant, as though its starlight would pour out.


    Its dangerous, so please dont do that.


    Why are you worried about me?


    Well, right before my eyes


    Carynne watched Raymonds face. The banquet was still in full swing behind him. She could hear music flowing through, as well as peoples voices as they talked. Raymonds face was obscured by the shadows brought on by the radiance behind him.


    Its alright. The railings thick.


    And she wouldnt die until <i>that</i> day anyway. Carynne looked sideways and down the railing. There was a well-trimmed tree in the garden below.


    Even if I fall from here, wouldnt that tree break my fall?


    At least, thats what happened in the past.


    You dont need to take such a useless risk.


    Or will you save me, Sir Raymond?


    Carynne, if youre really curious, then you can go ahead and try.


    Mmh


    Carynne decided to cut it out. She couldnt see Raymonds expression exactly, but if she tried to test it out for no reason, it might only lead to heartache. Itll just lead to a <i>st</i> one head cracked open, and then death.


    As she giggled, Carynne jumped down from the railing.


    Ouch


    I told you so.


    Ugh


    Carynne sprained her ankle, perhaps because of her high heels. Tears welled up in her eyes. She couldnt stop. Carynne crouched down and held back a groan.


    Its too difficult to stand.


    Did you sprain your ankle?


    Yes. Its embarrassing, but do you mind if I take off a shoe?


    If it makes youfortable, please go ahead.


    Carynne carefullyvery carefullytook off one golden shoe. And she herself had to grimace at the stench. It was a smell that any other girl would have made sure to hide until the end out of shame.


    Thats pretty severe, Raymondmented.


    Dont ask whether Ive washed it or not.


    Its not to the degree that Ill


    Going down on one knee, Raymond observed Carynnes injured foot.


    Is this that wound?


    It leads me to think that Miss Ise Evans has shoes made entirely out of steel.


    Mmh.

 Chapter 72

    Chapter 72


    Um, can you put my foot down now?


    Its a bit embarrassing. The injury was quite serious, but this wasnt the ce to show it to someone else.


    Also, Carynne was a bit surprised with herselfshe didnt think shed be embarrassed. Now that she thought about it, she had never tried drunkenly walking around the streets, naked. As expected, she still had a long way to go.


    Unlike Carynne, who was thinking about all kinds of scenarios while trying to hold back herughter, Raymond had a pretty serious expression.


    Whats got you thinking so hard?


    These shoes are too big for you, Carynne.


    Thats because they belong to Miss Ise Evans.


    Mister Verdic isnt the kind of man who wouldnt pay attention to details.


    Now thats something to ponder. Was the Mister Verdic he spoke off the same Mister Verdic who starved Carynne just because she wasted one single needle a while ago?


    It must be because hes still in shock about losing his daughter, Raymond added.


    Ises not dead though?


    Carynne wanted to say this, but she suppressed the urge to utter the words. If only the girl really was dead. Oh, howfortable that would be. Right now, even if Carynne had two bodies, it wouldnt be enough.


    She was somewhat disappointed by how he worded that, as though the me was falling upon Carynne.


    No matter whats done to me, are you just going to ept it all?


    But Carynne kept quiet about this since she knew that whining about that here would just be out of ce.


    But rather than a minor detail such as this What I mean to say is that he seems to be a bit cruel, Raymond exined.


    I know.


    You dont know.


    No, I really do.


    But Carynne didnt want to start an argument. Raymond looked somewhat despondent.


    You said youd show me a magic trick.


    What kind of magic trick did you think itd be?


    I thought youd win in a splendid way in a game.


    Really?


    Yes. Thats how I thought youd prove your worth.


    Well I guess that wouldve sufficed.


    Carynne gestured with one finger and pointed towards the champagne in an ice bucket that was next to Raymond. However, whats present was just the bottle.


    Do allow me a bit of constion.


    There are no sses.


    Just give it to me.


    As Carynne stopped Raymond from calling a servant for a ss, she beckoned for him to open it. If Dun was here, he would have just told her not to drink.


    From the bottle?


    Yes. Ive not had any alcohol, so it feels like I cant live.


    At your age


    Raymond looked a bit helpless, and so he eded to Carynnes request. <i>Pop!</i> The cork popped out. She took the bottle from him and immediately downed the champagne.


    The alcohol burned her throat. It was a pleasant sensation. Its been a while since shest had a drink.


    Feeling a little better now, Carynne asked Raymond.


    So, if I won against Baron Ein, would that do it?


    Who knows. Rather than that, I was just expecting that you would have won. You were very confident about it, jumped right in front of the card table and ignored everyone who tried to stop you.


    No way, are you sulking?


    Carynne looked at Raymond with widened eyes. At this, Raymond averted his gaze.


    Please dont say it like that. Im just a bit taken aback.


    Ahaha.


    Carynneughed.


    At the same time,ughter broke out in the hall as well. What good timing.


    Do I seem ipetent now?


    To the extent that Im thinking about canceling our engagement.


    Youre all talk.


    Carynne and Raymonds engagement would push through anyway. As long as theyd already been connected once, then they wouldnt be pulled apart. As long as they werent split apart from the beginning, then Raymond would never let go of Carynne. Whether it was because of feelings, whether it was because of outside forces.


    You seem more normal than I had expected.


    Then I wonder just what kind of image you had of me.


    Carynne raised a finger off the bottle and tapped it. This was to gauge how much liquor was left inside. Shes a bit dizzy now because she gulped down too much at once.


    If I really had won against Baron Ein, what would that make of me?


    Beating him would have proved that you have the talent of a good gambler.


    And I would have been able to hear a bit of my mothers love affairs.


    In the end, its just that. Carynne grinned.


    Though Baron Ein had suggested that she meet Crown Prince Gueuze, theres something else thats more urgent. And she was bound to meet the prince somehow or another anyway.


    Carynne and Crown Prince Gueuze would meet each other even if it wasnt through Baron Ein. So far though, he hasnt given Carynne any worthwhile answers.


    Since she was more determined to do a bit more digging about her mother, Carynne knew theyd meet someday. Even so, he was stillin the enda loser in all this. He was lower on thedderpared to Fief Lord Hare and Baron Ein.


    Even if its a littleter, Ill still be able to ask Crown Prince Gueuze about my mother.


    A man who was worthless to Catherine was worthless to Carynne. Even though he was this nations crown prince, to Carynne, he was nothing but a minor character.


    More importantly, if she wanted to go through more important things like this with better efficiency, then she was going to need a hand. Right now though, she was already taking on the role of Ise, so if she were to be upied with that as well, then time would pass swiftly, and shed eventually die without getting anything done. Thats the worst oue in Carynnes opinion.


    Sir Raymond, you think I can do magic, right?


    A witch who cant guess a single card right is just going to die from starvation though.


    Then Ill show you.


    Meanwhile, Raymond had yet to let go of Carynne. But even if itse to this, what then? Shed rather show him something else.


    You know, youve been apanying me every night, havent you, Sir Raymond?


    Yes.


    I work during the day, and Ive always been surrounded by maids at other times. Most of those maids are from Mister Verdics side.


    What are you getting at now, Im curious.


    Youll be hearing about my magic, thats what.


    Carynne looked straight into Raymonds eyes. She wondered what kind of reaction hed show once shes said it.


    A prostitute was found by the river earlier this morning, yes? A corpse with her uterus sliced away and her eyes pulled out.


    If she were to win in a card game, even by andslide, shed be regarded just as a good gambler.


    She didnt want that kind of oue. It wouldnt satisfy her. And Carynne was denying her own denial. Thats what Carynne wanted to reject more than anything.


    It was this denial: the notion that repeatedlying back to life was merely a delusion of hers.


    Carynne denied that denial thoroughly. It was an insult to her own life. And if she couldnt investigate and verify that first, then she wouldnt start doing anything else.


    Still, how would she be able to confirm it? If she won a game, how could she confirm between these two possibilitiesof whether she truly knew the right cards to pick, or whether shes just a good gambler.


    Carynne was the only one who knew about the coachmans feelings shifting from Nancy to Donna. But this evidence in itself was worthless.


    So, she concluded, the person whod help her confirm it should not be privy to what she knew. Even if he held hostility against Carynne, Raymond would have no choice but to help her, and so he was the right man for the job.


    Carynne held up three fingers.


    Three more women will die in the next month. The newspapers will quite certainly want to give a nickname to the killer, and itll be Jack of Spades. Theyll say that the shape of the dagger over the victims hearts resembles a spade, or I guess something along those lines?


    Carynne was enjoying herself. This expression of his looked new to her. Its really delightful to look at.


    Normal, he said? How fun. Lets see what youll think in the future.


    And the prostitute that was found this morning isnt the first victim. The first woman to die from a practice run can be found in the birch forest within the Evansnd. Wanna go see?


    * * *


    Carynne had to go back to the carriage alone that night. Raymond went away before she could even admire his reaction more.


    Right now, Donna was holding Carynnes hand, though it was the maid whos shaking with anxiety. Donna was terrified because Carynne had lost arge sum of money.


    The master is definitely going to get very angry What do we do, Mdy.


    Carynne nced at the trembling Donna for a moment, but she soon propped her chin on the back of one hand as she looked up at the evening sky.


    Of course Verdic was going to be angry. Honestly, what she had lost wasnt a lot of money for him. But hell get angry anyway.


    Raymond said this earlier.


    You dont know Mister Verdic.


    No. She knew him very well. Carynne knew well enough that Verdic was going to say oh-so-many things tonight. Among the people who had killed Carynne, she remembered Verdic better than anyone elsesimply because he killed her many different times.


    Verdic was rather simple. He loved his daughter, Ise Evans, while he hated Carynne, and thats that. Just the fact that he didnt look at Carynne with a lustful gaze made the rtionship between the two neat and simple.

 Chapter 73

    Chapter 73


    Donna, a corpse was found this morning. Do you know that were about the same age as that woman?


    That should have no connection to us though


    The dead woman who had been found this morning was in the papers. Theres not a lot of details known  right now , but by tomorrow evening, more would be known about the incident. Its true that the dead woman had no connection to them in terms of background. She died at the next town over after all.


    Although she was the same age as them, shes been selling her body ever since she was thirteen years old. Then, at eighteen, she was murdered in a ditch. She had a very pretty face, but that didnt really matter anymore. Her face got ripped right off.


    But whats the difference between the woman in the papers and the female lead in a novel? To me, theres no difference between her and us, but you dont know that, do you.


    This is nothingpared to that kind of situation.


    Donna didnt say anything back. Carynne didnt say anything either.


    The maid in front of Carynne would never understand what would happen to Carynne or what the dead woman from the next town had experienced.


    Its alright.


    Thats nothing, you know.


    Carynnes daily life, while it was filled entirely with manualbor, was difficult to endure as it was eating away at her. It was a waste of time, and it was difficult not being able to understand the situation at hand. Thats why Carynne had hinged the matter of figuring it all out to an external incident rather than trying to sort it out by herself internally.


    <b>The serial murders of the Jack of Spades.</b>


    Carynne knew about this case. Its written in the papers. Really though, this incident didnt matter to her at all. Murders happened every year. Just think about what went on throughout the empireor even the entire continent. Theres not one day that something like this wouldnt happen.


    For Carynne, this incident existed only in print. Its somebody elses business. Eventually, the criminal would be caught, and anyone involved in the case would also be caught.


    She must confess to Sir Raymond. She hoped that he would believe her. Like Donna, Raymond might not understand Carynne now, but he will, eventually.


    Carynne will make that happen.


    * * *


    At around the time of dawn, when the sun hadnt even risen yet, Verdic called for Carynne. Donna woke her up, the maids face obviously tinged with fear. She was still in her nightgown, but Carynne had to go down to the cer like that.


    Miss Carynne.


    Mister Verdic.


    Verdic was still in his suit. An oppressive air emanated from his thick frame. He had a whip in one hand.


    So you used money just as you pleased.


    I apologize.


    <i>Crackle!</i>


    He whipped the cold stone floor. The loud noise echoed threateningly inside the cer.


    Not only that, but you wasted it away in a gambling den.


    You got involved with Baron Ein, bet all that money on a game of cards without my permission, and you lost.


    What do you think Ill say to you now?


    I apologize.


    Carynne continued to ask for his forgiveness time and again, but inwardly, shes just wondering if Raymond had already found the corpse. A fleeting thought also passed through her mind that her back might not be so different from that corpse after she would be whipped this morning.


    And Raymonds saying that she didnt know what kind of cruelty Verdic was capable of?


    Carynneughed at the young mans words.


    Hold her down.


    Yes, sir.


    Carynnes arms were held tightly by stocky maids. As she was forced to kneel, she felt the biting coldness of the floor seeping into her skin.


    Carynne Evans. You seem to have misunderstood something.


    I apologize.


    You entered this household as my daughter, but that doesnt mean that you can use my wealth as Ise does.


    Thats why you need to pull your own weight.


    Verdic wasnt pleased by Carynnes silence. At a ce like this, he would rather hear her cry desperately as she struggled. But she did not want to give him that satisfaction.


    Hold onto the frame.


    The cer was cold even though they were at the height of summer. How many years had it been since she wasst dragged to this ce?


    Despite being in the midst of all this, itsughable how she was still feeling sleepy. And after sleeping, she would walk up soon enough.


    Huuk.


    Donna was dragged in as well, eyes and mouth closed shut. Tears were pooling around her eyes. That child was a huge coward. Ises the same. However, even if she was scared at first, she would eventually smile. Thats the difference between a maid and the master.


    Dont cry, Donna.


    Im the one who wants to cry, so why are <i>you</i> crying. Im the one whos going to get hit.


    Thats what Carynne wanted to say, but it seemed like thats not something Verdic would have wanted to hear.


    Who told you that you can speak however you want?


    Carynne pushed against the arms of the maids holding her.


    Let go of me. Ill do it.


    Im used to this already, you know. Please, I just dont want to scream. Please, I dont want to lose myposure. Please, dont faint.


    Carynne walked closer to the frame, her back exposed. The cers door was mmed shut.


    In the end, it was impossible not to scream.


    * * *


    Ah, I think I can live a little now.


    Verdic patted his throbbing shoulder and took off bloodstained clothes. A servant brought him new clothes.


    Hows my shoulder? Its throbbing a little.


    It is just muscle pain.


    Really? Good. I rarely move my body these days, so I guess I cant do things like this without exerting myself anymore. Isnt that right, Reverend?


    Dun maneuvered Verdics shoulder once, but when Verdic didnt grunt, he just instructed the servant to change Verdics clothes.


    When When do you think Ise is going to wake up?


    I apologize.


    Reverend.


    Verdic wielded the horse whip in his hand.


    <i>Crackle!</i>


    The desk shook as though it was about to break. There was a scratch left on that wooden desk.


    Dun merely nced down at that desk with an indifferent expression.


    Im a father who has a daughter. I can get testy.


    As time went by, Verdic grew more nervous. Ise still had not opened her eyes. Even though it looked like she was getting better, she still wouldnt wake up. Because of this, Verdic increasingly became infuriated with Dun.


    Verdics gratitude towards Dun slowly waned, and all thats left were doubts that piled up. He wanted to give Dunshings as well.


    These days.


    From the bloody whip, Verdic nced sideways towards Duns face.


    It seems like youre stuttering less?


    I-Its a psychological affliction. As long as I dont feel nervous, Im fine.


    I must have startled you just now then.


    With his head bowed down, Dun answered.


    No, you didnt.


    But you said thats the case just now.


    Yes.


    Carynne is immoderately insolent.


    Thats right.


    Dun nodded and agreed with the other man.


    How dare she even waste my money. I thought about exacting your revenge as well, Reverend Dun. You might not know it very well, but such an impudent wench should be thoroughly destroyed.


    But you went too far today.


    Reverend?


    Verdic clutched the handle of the whip tighter.


    Im just guessing, but.


    Duns face was as pale as ever. Verdic stared at the priests face and asked.


    You still dont have feelings for Carynne Evans, do you?


    His doubts grew stronger as time went by.


    Unlike Ise, who was in the helpless state of aa, Carynne suffered at best with only nursing the other young woman. And every night, she would flirt with Ises fianc, Raymond, whilst she socialized. Verdic had a very difficult time holding back his wrath.


    He tried to give everything he could to Ise, and yet she was just lying there like a corpse. But then Carynne, who had made his daughter so jealous, was enjoying everything that Ise should have had for herself. Wealth, men, beauty. And now, the money of Ises father, Verdic!


    I already knew shes a mannerless wretch. Parents go crazy when their child acts like that.


    The night before, Verdic almost went blind with anger when he found out that Carynne had gambled with Baron Ein. How dare she. And so, he whipped Carynne just to remind her of her ce.


    He hit her more than he had nned to.


    While he was whipping her, he felt the sympathetic gazes of the maids around him. He could understand Carynnes maid looking like that, but even the maids he had employed for many years had watched the scene with some displeasure. It seemed as if those eyes were looking at a viin.


    Verdic felt a huge wave of difort surging within him.


    Merchants were very aware of profits and losses. Right now, Verdic was suspicious of even Dun. He doubted whether it was truly a good thing that he let Carynne enter his household as his adoptive daughter.


    And he also did not like the sympathetic gazes directed towards Carynne. If even the maids he had employed for a long time were feeling sorry for her while he whipped her, then what about Dun, who was right in front of him now? What kind of emotions did he feel when he made that suggestion?


    He wanted to ask.


    He heard that Dun and Carynne were distant rtives and that they knew each other from when they were younger. Then,pared to a betrayed man, wouldnt a blood rtive be more susceptible to lingering feelings when faced with the distant cousin who had nowhere else to go?


    Then if thats the case, then the illusion of letting Carynne Evans enjoy the benefits of the family name would have to be thoroughly destroyed. A parents anger should be properly resolved.


    Do you think that I hit her too hard?


    Then, Verdic stared intently into Duns eyes just to see if even a sh of sympathy would appear.


    However, Duns eyes were too dark for him to tell. The priest responded with a rough voice.


    Not at all.


    Dun reached forward and ced a hand on Verdic. It was a cold, yetforting touch.


    Even if she dies, I dont care.

 Chapter 74

    Chapter 74


    M-Mdy?


    A-Are you alright?


    Do I <i>look</i> like I am?


    Even just lying down while enduring the pain was difficult. The moment she returned to her room, with Donnas help, Carynney down on her bed and pressed down on the urge to let out all the tears and curse words. She wouldnt be able to sleep on her back. Shed have to lie down face first like this the whole time.


    Donna was trembling as she removed Carynnes clothes over her back. The blood-soaked fabric had stuck to her torn skin, and just the sensation of removing the clothes was horrifying. However, if the dress was left as it was, then scabs would be formed over the cloth, and it would be impossible to removeter.


    Carynne bit down on a pillowcase to suppress her pained groans. Donna continued to sob even though she wasnt the one who got whipped. However, Carynne was bothered even by Donnas sympathetic tears.


    Oh God.. This, just


    How is it?


    Hiic, hiic


    Did you not hear me? I just asked you how it is.


    Carynne wanted to snap at her, but in this reality, she had to endure even her own anger. She had to be kind. Be a kind female lead. Be a kind master. Be kind


    Kind?


    Why should I?


    Why was she still shackled by the novels characterization of her when she had already killed people? Carynne wanted to act wickedly. But at the same time, she knew that she had to restrain herself here. Even if she kicked up a fuss now, theres nothing for her to gain.


    Her situation right now was the product of an action she herself chose, and it would only be unseemly for her to whine about it. She could only me herself. She was annoyed by this, and that annoyance made her even more annoyed.


    Anger and annoyance were two different things. One of them was an irrepressible emotion that would eat away at a person.


    Oh my god, the blood


    Huuk


    At around the time of dawn, when the sun had already risen, light of a blue hue enveloped the room. It was a gloomy daybreak.


    If people start dying in the midst of a riot.


    Perhaps, as the world bes engulfed with chaos, thats when she can be at peace.


    Ah!


    It hurts, it hurts, I want to die, stop, fuck!


    As disinfectant was applied to her skin, her mind went nk. Carynne clenched her teeth. Her fatigued mncholy was flung away as pain made its presence known. When Donna applied the disinfectant, it was almost a convulsion when her body flinched.


    A-Are you alright, Mdy?


    Do I look like Im okay?


    Even if she won during that card game, she would have still been whipped. Back then, Carynne used to y cards on Ises behalf. But she was hit only twice during that time. Verdic had never hit her this hard.


    Perhaps hed be twisted after his daughter got bedridden. The wounds she sustained from the whip were worse than ever. And apparently, its not just that.


    What is it?


    Donna asked nervously when one of Verdics maids showed up. The maid conveyed her masters message with an expressionless face.


    Ivee to deliver a message. After you change your clothes, you must go to Lady Ises room.


    At those words, Donnas expression crumpled.


    Just look at Mdy right now. Are you seriously telling her to work?


    <i>How could you speak like that towards your superior. </i>But those words wouldnt really match the situation.


    Carynne buried her face into a pillow. And inevitably let out a groan. She really, truly hated this time of the year.


    She was expecting that shed be able to live morefortably since she took up the position of Ise, but then all she had been saddled with was <i>more</i> work. She let out a groan, then she sighed deeply.


    Even when Carynne was lying on her stomach like this, she listened to the maids words. What she was saying now were just the usual words. Nothing had changed.


    It is the Masters order.


    Ill do it instead of Mdy.


    If theres a difference this time, then that was Donna. Should Carynne feel touched? Among the maids shes had all this time, Donna was by far the most good-natured one. She was gentle and kind-hearted, and because she was so normal, perhaps that made her more peculiar. Maybe its because she never had Donna so close to her before in her life.


    If Carynne looked at the girl more closely, there was a hint of darkness in her eyes, and there was a rotten surface lying deep below. Still, the girl had yet to reveal that side of her. Just to match her outward nature, Donna still felt story for Carynne.


    However, as expected, Carynne didnt feel touched. But she was fascinated. Before Donna, Sera also felt sorry for Carynne, though she wasnt as vocal about it. In the end though, they were both just powerless maids. Donnas sympathy would not be of any help to Carynne.


    The other maid answered mechanically.


    It is Lady Carynnes job.


    No, but, just Just look at her state


    Donna pointed towards Carynne. Her back looked quite literally like a rag. Verdic gave her tenshings.


    Lady Carynne should be in Lady Ises room within ten minutes.


    How could she work when her back looks like a rag? Cant you see how she shouldnt nurse someone else when she herself needs to be taken care of?


    The pale skin of her back was marred with angry red lines. She knew that the scars shed get from these wouldnt disappear until she died and woulde back to life. Before getting whipped, she had wanted to try on a backless dress, but that was impossible now, at least until shede back to life.


    Ive already said it. It is the Masters order.


    Please dont be like this Turn a blind eye just this once, please. Ill definitely pay you backter.


    If only that was possible. However, Carynne knew that there was only one choice here.


    Donna. Its my job, I have to do it.


    Carynnes voice cracked. Even if she didnt want it to.


    Im fine.


    * * *


    Honestly, how could I possibly be fine?


    Carynne was now inside the room of the sleeping Ise. She arrived a little earlier than usual, thats why the room was still dark.


    Has Raymond found the corpse by now? Carynne was still curious about that. Would he bring her a present? If he would, then that at least wouldfort her in this situation.


    To be honest, youre in a much better state than me. All you have to do is close your eyes and sleep. Nothing to hurt you, nothing to torment you.


    After some time, everything will start once again, and you wouldnt know it.


    Carynne could feel blood still trickling down her back. She was tearing up just from the pain of it. Donna had disinfected her open wounds clumsily and bandaged it as though she wanted to make Carynne look like a mummy. However, the pain did not go away.


    Ise. You know, I hate your father.


    Even more so than I hate you.


    Its impossible for her to be fine. Theres no way any person could get used to torture. Nobody would be able to get used to a whip that would strike at you so quickly. With your skin being ripped apart, its a lie that you can immerse yourself in your own thoughts. Its all an illusion.


    It was impossible to endure when faced with a whip. It was impossible not to beg. When the fifthshing came, Carynne started screaming. <i>Spare me, please. I was wrong, please forgive me. </i>And yet, the whip did not stop. The only things she could withstand were the things she had already ovee.


    Why must I be in pain?


    Unbridled anger shot up. Why did she have to keep doing this over and over again? Why? Its impossible to let this go. Its impossible to be fine. The only reason her anger towards Verdic was watered down to this extent was because there were many other people who had once killed her. He wasnt the only one, so she could still look at him in the face.


    If you die, Mister Verdic will be inconsble.


    Carynne held the pair of scissors that she had kept hidden.


    She wondered, why did Verdic make her Ises attendant. Did he even know what she could do to this girl. Or did he think that she wouldnt aim to do something like this. Even now, if she were to do anything less than perfect while taking care of Ise, she would have been heavily reproached.


    But after all thoseshings, did he truly believe that shed continue to put up with this?


    <i>Tak.</i>


    The IV tube connected to Ises hand was cut. Carynne stared at the dripping liquid that was soaking the bed. Then, she stared at Ises neck. Even as the situation had progressed to this, even as a sharp pair of scissors was being pointed at her neck, she continued to stay blissfully unconscious, her chest going up and down at the same pace without fail.


    Would Ise stay unconscious if Carynne stabbed her neck right now? Or would she wake up screaming?


    Carynne raised the pair of scissors. If she were to stab Ise here, then she would be out of the picture. Once shes gone from the narrative, what will happen?


    Carynne asked.


    Do you love Miss Ise?


    Sir Raymond.


    She asked the man who had grabbed her wrist.


    This time, yet again, Carynnes attempt ended in failure.

 Chapter 75

    Chapter 75


    Yeah, she knew this would happen.


    Raymond grabbed Carynnes arm. It seemed as if he had rushed to get here. He was panting a little. With a flushed face, he spoke in a whisper.


    Stop.


    Okay.


    Carynne nodded slowly. Actually, she wasnt nning to do this. She could have killed Ise here and that would be fine. If she couldnt kill her, then thats also fine. If she was really nning to kill Ise, she would have run straight to the bed and immediately cut down the other girls throat. Thats what it looked like right now. However, Raymond wasnt aware of this. Her wrist started to hurt. Carynne spoke again.


    Youre already holding my hand and stopping me from doing anything.


    So please let me go. I understand. This is something I cant do.


    She already knew that she couldnt do it.


    Im telling the truth, so let me go.


    Carynne realized that her face was stained with tears. Raymond was just staring at her. Then, he took the scissors from Carynne with his other hand.


    He led Carynne to a chair and made her sit, then he cuffed her hands together.


    You dont have to do this, she said.


    Do you think Ill believe you right now?


    I dont think I can even believe my own thoughts.


    Carynne burst into tears, intoughter.


    After Raymond had bound Carynnes hands, he then began to change Ises bed sheets. He moved deftly, very unlike a noble man.


    As Carynne watched him change Ises sheets and IV line, she asked him.


    Have you confirmed it?


    He should know what she was talking about. Raymond replied.


    Yes. There was a corpse in the area you told me about.


    And as soon as Carynne heard this, she couldnt help but let out a peal ofughter even as tears streamed down her cheeks.


    Good. What a relief.


    She could be certain now.


    She was repeating the same past.


    Even if Nancy had muddled her memories, this fact couldnt be denied.


    I see.


    Carynne was overjoyed. She could finally be sure. It was so difficult to live with doubts that constantly lived inside her mind. She let out a relieved smile.


    Sir Raymond. I have a confession.


    You know, I. I believe that this world is a world within a novel.


    Mm.


    Raymonds expression changed subtly. Was that a smile? But the situation was too dire for him to have interpreted that as a joke. Carynne cried andughed.


    Ah, I shouldnt look crazy.


    Fortunately, Raymond didnt say anything. And he just stared at Carynne. So she continued.


    Its not a figure of speech or a metaphor. I know how it sounds. But to me, this is the truth.


    I need help. Half of my daysmy nightswere entirely Raymonds. I cant spend my time just working like this.


    Until now, Ive constantly dreamt about death. No, to be honest theyre not dreams. Until now, I have died over and over again, one hundred times. After the novels plot is finished, I keep going back to the start.


    Carynne, slow down.


    You have to believe me. I supposedly came to this ce for the first time in my life, but tell me, how is it possible that Im taking care of Ise better than a professional nurse? Tell me, how do I know whats going to happen in the future? If this isnt enough proof, if you still dont believe me, then I can show you more.


    Even if we have to meet for the first time again, Im certain that I will love you. You dont have to be scared. I will protect you.


    But he couldnt even remember.


    Its alright. Everythings alright now. I believe you.


    How about this time?


    Carynne leaned back on the chair she was sitting on. She could still feel the blood dripping. She lifted her bound hands and clutched her clothes tightly with her fingers. Her wounds were so bad that her dress hade loose because she couldnt wear it tightly.


    With her back exposed, Carynne said to Raymond.


    Ive been killed by Mister Verdic one hundred times so far.


    Murder. And he probably knew.


    This time, perhaps it would be difficult for you to love me.


    Please help me.


    If thats the case, then shouldnt she at least appeal to his sympathy?


    * * *


    Earlier, when the corpse was found


    Raymond left it to Xenon to mark the spot on the map where they found the corpse, then he urgently rushed back to Evans mansion. As he ran, the revolver in his pocket made little noise. His objective was certain.


    That woman.


    Carynne Hare, now Carynne Evans. The red-haired woman who had reced Ise Evans as his fiance. Still, the woman who suited him better.


    Carynne Hare.


    This matter was of concern if he had just found the body himself. The problem was Carynne Hare. Now, Carynne Evans. That seventeen-year-old girl. The girl who was the target of his gun.


    How far involved was she in this? How far could he ignore it? No, he couldnt ignore it any longer.


    The things he wanted to ignore were the same things he couldnt ignore because Carynne considered herself to be Raymonds partner.


    In fact, Raymond wasnt expecting much from Carynne. It was enough for her to have a beautiful appearance. It was also fun to talk to her because of her wit.


    At first, he thought about loving her. He believed that he coulde to love her. The moment he first held Carynne in his arms, he felt himself shudder. Because of her beauty, because of her madness.


    And she was the one who proposed that they should side together, to hold each others hand.


    With her wide eyes filled with tears. With her seething voice.


    Mister Verdic is my enemy.


    So, lets hold hands and be partners. Raymond agreed.


    However, the moment he saw the dead body of that woman, his heart gave up. Carynne was holding his hand only to manipte him.


    Thats funny.


    Teaming up for a bigger goal was something he could have done a lot longer. However, if Carynne was just trying to hold onto him to shake him, then it was a different story. If she had decided to hold his hand, in the meantime, they should cooperate at the very least. It wasnt about pride or justice. It was a matter of priority. It would be impossible to do anything if he was merely at her mercy.


    Verdic Evans.


    Raymond did not believe that Carynne held pure hatred for Verdic. Because, from the very beginning, the fief lord did not kill himself.


    She said that the fief lord killed himself? That kind of situation was usible enough. However, Raymond saw that one of his shoes hade off. If the cause of his death truly was suicide, then it would be unusual for him to have struggled and had taken off only one shoe.


    Struggling wasmon when dying in that way, but both shoes should have still been on unless they had been taken off in advance.


    He wasnt wearingfortable slippers. The shoes he had on were fastened by a string. His other shoe had been tied tightlyexactly how a nervous person would have done it.


    However, the fact that the other one had been taken off made Raymond think of the opposite conclusion.


    The fief lord may have prepared himself tomit suicide, but there was someone who had clung to his leg in the end.


    Carynne was connected in some way. She didnt kill him herself, but it was clear that she had a hand in this.


    The carriage when Raymond had faced her. Then, the two women who were missing from the mansion where that carriage was stationed.


    And another missing woman, Ise Evans


    Rather than the fact that he had saved Carynne from that mansion at that time, he thought could use this instead. But then, he regretted it. Since he could put some pressure on Carynne and since they had amon hatred for Verdic, was it right to judge that he could use her well? Then he should have just pressed her more.


    As it was, he was just being swayed by Carynne. And what Raymond had to do at this moment was to <i>not</i> report this. The cost outweighs the benefits. And he didnt have any proper evidence.


    Unlike how it was done in the military, the forensic methods in the cities were few and far in between. And above all, Raymond was a soldier, not an investigator. This was the capital, not the battlefield. There was nothing he could do.


    Did she calcte even this?


    It seems like nobles have too many things to think about.


    Murder. Perhaps, serial murders.


    Raymond was not a detective and not a part of the police force. For just a little while more, he wouldnt even be a soldier any longer.


    But there was something that Carynne didnt know about him. Even if he had joined hands with her, he had a different sense of duty. He stood by the side of justice.


    Rather than just his resistance against Carynne and how she was dealing with him, he had a greater sense of duty when it came to catching a murder suspect. If she was a murderer who was killing for pleasure, if she was someone who couldnt keep her moralsif she was like a gun that couldnt be controlledthen he had to take responsibility.


    Two months from now.


    It would only be two months from today that hed officially enter the noble council. The position was practically his already, but it was still a crucial period.


    He shouldnt meddle in dangerous things. Eighty percent of his position would be attributed to Verdic. Raymond was best at shooting the head off of some person a distance away. In the setting of a conference, it wasnt his strong suit to deal with people who were in seats of power.


    But it didnt matter. If Carynne would continue to kill, if she really was using him, then it was uneptable. Something evil was being done in front of him, and it should be prevented. Even if it was at the cost of losing his wealth and honor.


    So, he finally arrived at Evans manor. Raymond raised his head and nced at the door to Carynnes room.


    The lights were off. Was she still asleep? If so, then thats better. Raymond took out the revolver and the handcuffs from his coat pocket.


    Then, he knocked on her door. Better to capture her first, then think about itter.


    Carynne?


    There was no answer. Was she really still not awake?


    <i>Knock, knock.</i>


    He knocked once more. He couldnt hear anything inside. Raymond clutched the revolver in one hand.


    <i>Creak</i>


    Raymond opened the door. There was no one inside. The bed was covered with blood and bandages. The smell of alcohol stung his nose.


    Whose blood was this? There was a significant amount of blood strewn inside. What happened in Carynnes room that so much blood had been spilled?


    And there wasnt just blood, but also bandages and alcohol. Someone had been badly hurt. And they had been treated.


    He calmed down his panting breaths. Raymond felt that he should calm himself down a bit more.


    After ruffling his hair with one hand, he raised the revolver and thought of pointing the muzzle into his mouth.


    <i>Click, click, click.</i>


    He loaded it with bullets and rolled the barrel. Then, he pointed it at his temple. The cold metal of the gun cleared his mind.


    If I pull the trigger like this, I will die. Dont think.


    When Raymond had been called to war as a sniper, he was ratherfortable with it. He didnt have to take responsibility for anyone else out there.


    But as a noble, he must think. He wouldnt be able to survive without thinking. Raymonds n until now was not bad.


    But was it really?


    Hiiik!


    !


    Lo Lord Raymond?


    It was a servant of the Verdic family. Raymond took off the gun. As though he had been caught pleasuring himself, he felt a wave of shame wash through him.


    What on earth


    But the servants words were cut short by a question.


    Wheres Carynne?


    Then, the servants eyes wavered.


    She She


    Had she been arrested for beingplicit with murder? How far was she connected with this case? Or was it the other way aroundsomeone else was helping her kill?


    One particr theory shed through his mind, the one that he was deeply suspicious of.


    That Carynne was conspiring together with Verdic from the very start.


    Then everything would make sense. If this truly was the case.


    Speak.


    However, the answer that came back to him wasnt what he had been expecting.


    Trembling, the servant replied.


    She went to work at Lady Ises room.


    So she didnt run away after murdering someone.


    Was he overthinking it?


    Raymond turned his head and looked at the room once more. She went to work. But this room was left in too much chaos for her to have gone out to do such a mundane thing.


    Whose blood is this.


    U-Um.


    M-Master Verdic punished her.


    Punished?


    Because the Lady had gambled


    This blood was Carynnes. But why was this servant so anxious that it seemed as if she didnt know what to do?


    Whats your connection to this.


    I-I have no power. I am merely a servant, sir. O-Of course, I thought that the Master had been too harsh, but


    Raymond was perhaps disappointed to figure out why the servant was trembling so badly. Shes thinking that he was angry about the fact that Carynne had gotten hurt.


    That was the natural conclusion. He and Carynne had been acting intimately these days. They spent time together, theyughed, and even talked at dinner every night in front of Verdic. Its no wonder that this was what the servant thought.


    Huu.


    Feeling that his nerves were a little less taut, Raymond went up to Ises room. He silenced the sound of his footsteps.


    He heard Carynnes muttering voice inside the room.


    If you die


    Raymond opened the door. Carynne was holding a pair of scissors.


    At that moment, without thinking, Raymond moved. By the time he came to his senses, he was already holding Carynnes wrist.


    Carynne wasnt surprised by his sudden appearance. She just stared at him, then she asked.


    Do you love Miss Ise?


    At a time like this, was she joking? This woman must truly be crazy.


    Raymond bound Carynnes hands. Then, he looked at Ise. IV fluids and blood wetted the floor of the room.


    He hurriedly rolled up the sheets and examined Ises body. But there was not one wound on her body. The blood wasing from Carynne. The maid said that it was Carynne who got hurt.


    All Carynne did was cut Ises IV tube. What he could see from her was a face full of tears, then her back. It was filled with manifestations of malice. He had seen a lot of these wounds before. This was by no means just a product of discipline. She had been hit with the full strength of an adult man.


    Shit, what exactly happened that it came to this? Has Verdic gone mad? Did he detest gambling that much? Raymond was beside himself with angertowards both Verdic and himself. Was he not just thinking of pointing a gun at her just now?


    The two of us I think we need to talk.


    It was more like he was talking to himself now, and he felt depressed. What was running through him right now was, certainly, sympathy.


    And he sat down and looked at Carynne. Then she told him something unbelievable.

 Chapter 76: Her and his wager

    Chapter 76: Her and his wager


    Well be troubled if you do this.


    When Raymond paid the precinct a visit, the policemen grew ufortable. The knight was famous in many ways, and he was still a part of the military. The policemen were displeased by his interference. What hes doing could be considered an infringement of authority.


    Why dont you just ept it as an ordinary citizens report?


    Sir Knight, if you do this, it really


    Im just doing what Im supposed to do.


    Look here, if this was really just an ordinary citizens report, you would have just written a statement and left after that.


    At the sharp voice, Raymond looked up. Then, he was faced with a man who definitely would have reacted like that to him.


    Albert.


    Been a while. How long has it been?


    The brown-haired young man with a splendid mustache shook Raymonds hand. He was Inspector Albert Strieder, who graduated from the same academy. He was the ssmate who gave Raymond this brutal advice: if you dont kill, youre the one whos killed right away.


    After graduating from the military academy, he was instead assigned to the police force. He followed his fathers footsteps. If Raymond knew that hed bump into Albert here, he thought that he should have met him in advance.


    Raymond took Alberts hand and shook it.


    Youre still alive, huh.


    Albert smiled as he ced a hand on Raymonds shoulder.


    I thought you were gonna go straight to hell after getting shot in the head. On the <i>back</i> of your head.


    Sorry for not meeting your expectations. I dont have a bullet in the back of my head, but Ive seen my fair share. You can stillfort me.


    Cant you take a joke?


    With Raymond acting all friendly like this, it made Albert feel a bit ufortable. The assuaging treatment that Albert was giving Raymond right now implied a hint of rejection already. However, Raymond stopped him there and went straight to the point.


    Albert, are you the one in charge here? Theres something Id like to ask about the corpse that was found this morning.


    Why are you asking?


    Raymond immediately brought the matter at hand without even going through the motions of exchanging the appropriate greetings, and at this, Albert showed signs of difort.


    Pointing to himself, Raymond answered.


    I was the one who found it. I sent a servant first, but the report wasnt received properly.


    Alberts eyes went wide, then he looked at his subordinates, who had be intimidated by Raymond.


    No, it was received. Oy, you. The dead body of the woman on Seventh Avenue. You received it, yeah?


    Huh? Y-Yes, thats right.


    When Albert asked, the other policeman answered hastily. But Raymond immediately refuted the insincere response.


    Im talking about the body that was found in the forest this morningthats the report I sent. I heard that theres a woman found in the sewers earlier, too. The one from Seventh Avenue is yet another one?


    Scowling openly, Albert raised both hands and expressed his objection. He then answered sullenly.


    Hey, Raymond. Youre stepping out of bounds here. You cant press us like this. Leave this matter to us and just let it slide. Just calm down for now You I think youre almost delusional. Especially what you saidst time about What was it? Anyway, about that woman.


    You mean the victim? Nothing that the papers are saying matches up. About how shes been selling her body ever since she was thirteen and then she died at eighteen, and when she died, she was wearing red clothes. Thats what.


    Isnt that just an ordinary newspaper article? It serves to moderately relieve the citizens curiosity.


    Then as a witness myself who found the body and is anxious about this, cant you fill me in?


    Shit, give me a break.


    Albert.


    I know my name, Raymond.


    The air inside the room had be drastically tense. The two men were close enough to each other that they could exchange blows at any given time, and all the others around them looked like theyd do anything to leave this ce.


    Shit, dont insist arbitrarily that its a serial murder case. There are more differences thanmonalities between them. And prostitutes die frequently in this city. Youre a soldier, not a cop. Dont try to do <i>my</i> job.


    Show me the files.


    Its impossible to talk to you.


    I just want to confirm something with your records, Inspector. There must be a connection with the sketch I sent you. The culprit has a habit when stabbing the victims. All I want is to cooperate with you.


    Just stop it here. Youve told me about what you know, and at this ce, I know better than you. You cant solve a case just by pinpointing that habit. There needs to be a witness.


    Albert.


    Albert groaned and rubbed his forehead. Then, he red at Raymond.


    To be honest, if you were amoner, the first suspect would be you.


    Ha.


    So thank you very much for being a noble. Its because of your reputation and your station that youre not being suspected.


    Im grateful to death, thank you.


    This isnt an army full of your own subordinates. Youre in the city right now! Theres a procedure to everything! Weve also built our own methods of dealing with things.


    Albert forced a smile and gripped Raymonds shoulder. After he had let all those words out with a loud voice, he felt a little better.


    Help me out here.


    This isnt the warzone, and youre going to be a member of the Assembly soon, too. Just wait and see. Dead prostitutese up once a month. Most of them got beaten to death by men. And therere some that couldnt be found. With what happened this time, its obvious. Those women got tangled up with the wrong, ill-tempered gentlemen.


    So what youre saying is that its fine for those women to have died because theyre prostitutes?


    Dont get started with me. Theres no end to these things. Im just saying that I cant focus on this case all of a sudden just because you, a <i>noble</i>, found a body. If you want, go and try to get a bigger budget for uster.


    Isnt there just two months left until the elections of the Assembly? Ill leave it to you, so please.


    Im not earning much here. And youre just wasting my time.


    Raymond adjusted his clothes and pushed the door. From behind, Albert shouted loudly.


    Lets not do boring things next time and meet up when we both have time! My father wants to see you, too. Youd like that, too, yeah?


    Got it? Hey, where are you going?


    This poor citizen is trembling with fear, so Ill just hole myself up in my room and cry.


    Ill send you a telegram, so clear your schedule! Got it?


    Fine.


    After Raymond answered reluctantly, he went out to the streets. Xenon was sitting on a bench at the other side of the road, and when he saw Raymonde out, he raised his hand.


    Lord Raymond, how did it go?


    Nothing fruitful.


    Did you hear anything?


    Absolutely nothing. I didnt hear a single thing. He told me not to interfere.


    Well Theyve got to have their own circumstances, too.


    Seems like you know these things better than I do.


    Scratching his head, Xenon inquired.


    Um, uh, I know Im sticking my nose too far in this, but When you found the body, um uh You were calm like you were already expecting it, but you seem to be greatly flustered now. May I ask why its like that?


    Raymond pondered for a moment. How should he answer? To be honest with you, I think my fiance is connected to the serial murders. Thats why Im going crazy right now.


    Should he answer like that?


    But instead, Raymond smiled bitterly and dismissed the other mans words.


    Youre meddling too much.


    Yes, yes.


    Raymond ruffled his hair and let out a sigh. What did those words mean anyway. Truthfully, he couldnt even believe himself either. He found himself being swayed by her ridiculous words.


    Im someone whos from outside this novel.


    Unless he really got shot in the head, it was impossible to believe such nonsense. But at the same time, it was difficult to ignore what she said.


    At first, Raymond tried tofort Carynne. Then, he was at a loss for words. And ultimately, he was left in a state of confusion. Raymond was left with no choice but to visit the citys police precinct.


    At the end of the day, I didnt find out anything, but


    You did your best though, Lord Raymond.


    Thanks for the constion.


    But he didnt gain anything.


    With one hand, Raymond pressed down on his eyes. Hes exhausted. Though it was unbelievable, if he had a lead, and if it was a matter of murder, he couldnt just stand by and watch.


    Even if its not his job. More so, even if it was something that he could prevent.


    This isnt the battlefield, but dead bodies keep showing up.


    I know, sir. Please go home and rest for now. Youve done all that you can, Lord Raymond.


    <i>Ding, ding</i>


    The evening bell rang.

 Chapter 77

    Chapter 77


    Goodness, its already thiste Shall we go back for dinner now?


    The sunsets illumination colored the streets. However, the dimming lights gave off an ufortable atmosphere that was very unlike the summer.


    At the very least, this was a main street where the police precinct was, so there were people walking here from time to time. But just a few steps away, there was practically no one walking along the alleys.


    There was also a cathedral along this main street. All the roads led to the cathedral. In this era, where miracles no longer urred, Gods influence still remained.


    Habitually, Raymond made the sign of the cross.


    Lord Raymond?


    The next corpse will be along Seventh Street, and then the next one after that will be on the Seventeenth.


    Which way is Seventeenth Street?


    Huh? If you go along that way, youll get there.


    You know the roads well.


    Its ufortable staying at Mister Evans mansion. And the maids are so fussy that I cant even drink beer with themfortably.


    Huh.


    Thats why I often go out to eat. Its not too far away, so its worth the trek.


    Other than you, do other servants go as well?


    Raymond and Xenon chatted as they headed towards Seventeenth Street. Xenon vented about his dissatisfaction with the Evans household. It wasnt very like a middle-aged man toin like this.


    Yes. Well A few attendants or maids here and theree out every weekend and eat somewhere else. I got a lot of rmendations from them. The chicken dishes of a restaurant around that alley over there are amazing. The chicken skin is crispy, but the inside is tender, and the sauce is very


    Raymond raised his head when, some distance away, he had a clear view of Seventeenth Street.


    Lets just go there.


    Why did you even ask?


    Grumbling, Xenon followed after Raymond as he stepped through the doors of a tavern. It was dark inside, but noisy. A few men and women stared tantly at Raymond.


    Oh my. Hello, handsome.


    Xenon? Whos this with you?


    My boss.


    Then the rumors?


    Youre really handsome, huh.


    Raymond turned towards the squalidly dressed woman who was making eyes at him.


    I tried to warn you that this isnt a good ce. Are you alright with eating here?


    Ive been thinking this for a while now, but you keep treating me like Im a kid. Im fine. Though Id rather sit by the window.


    Raymond frowned. But even before he could sit down, a familiar face appeared.


    Thats


    Noticing that Raymond was referring to someone, Xenon turned his head to look.


    It was a familiar face to Xenon as well.


    Thats Lady Carynnes handmaiden, isnt it? Donna. Should I call her to have a drink with us?


    Hold on.


    Right now, Donna was scowling as she received a note from a man. Raymond observed Donnas lips.


    She received the note forcefully as though she was protesting, however, her shoulders were slumped when she went out the doors she had pushed through.


    Ah, she left.


    What would you like to eat?


    A rugged-looking head cook appeared before Xenon and Raymond. However, Raymond was still staring after Donna instead of looking at the cook.


    Why did shee here?


    Xenon, take your time and eat here.


    Lord Raymond?


    Raymond left Xenon at the table and hurried down the front steps.


    Donna?


    In the time that had passed, the streets had be buried in darkness. He caught sight of Donnas hair. Then, he recalled what Carynne said.


    The culprit behind the serial murders is Baron Ein.


    Donna entered Seventeenth Street. And thats where Carynne predicted the next murder would take ce.


    Raymond tried to clear his mind as he hastened his pace. He hung back around ten steps behind Donna. Where was she going?


    Did he believe her?


    So far, Carynnes ims had been in line with what has happened. Apart from that, she never left the mansion alone. She was bogged down with things to do from morning til evening. Verdic, who hated her, made sure of this. She regrly attended social gatherings every night as the heiress to Raymonds family and the Evans household.


    There was not a single thing to connect her to the serial murders. And her assertion that she knew the future had its own basis.


    Still, Raymond was too old to believe such a thing. If he was still a boy in his early teens, then perhaps.


    This is a world inside a novel, she said. And shes lived the same life over and over again.


    Raymond was not so free that hed believe an adolescent delusion which didnt sit well with him.


    But he was sure of thisthat Carynne was, somehow or another, involved.


    Donna stopped.


    Raymond also stopped.


    Why was she here. Donna was Carynnes handmaiden. Donna had served Carynne as a maid ever since they were at the Hare mansion, and she was with Carynne most of the time. Was she also involved in the murders?


    Raymond wouldnt disregard the kind of close-knitted rtionship women had. They shared too much with each other without much reservation.


    He wondered whether he should pull out his gun or not, but Donnas usual appearance made him hesitate. in and ignorant.


    Ah, seriously, I already said I dont want to!


    Who else was there?


    Raymond held his breath.


    In front of Donna, there was a man who had his face covered, and he was saying something. Their surroundings were so dark and Donna was in the way, so Raymond couldnt see who it was.


    Donna started to get annoyed, and the man in front of her also seemed a bit peeved.


    But surely its not going to be that bad of a


    Ah, enough! Dont ask to meet me like this anymore! Its so annoying!


    Impudent wench!


    AHH!


    Donna screamed as the man raised his hand. Raymond immediately pulled out his handgun.


    <i>Click. </i>The mans hand stopped. Tensions rose on that dark road.


    Huh? Sir Knight?


    Stand back.


    I know what youre thinking, but its not like that.


    The man grimaced, but he soon let go of Donnas hair.


    Both hands where I can see them. If you try to run away or fight back, Ill shoot you right away.


    <i>Ssh, ssh.</i> Brown mud sshed up and dirtied the soles of his shoes. An unpleasant sensation could be felt on the tip of his toes.


    The man raised both his hands. Then, Raymond checked his face.


    It was either a man he couldnt remember or someone he was meeting for the first time. Raymond pushed the man roughly against the wall and pointed the gun to the mans temple.


    The mans eyes grew wide.


    You will regret this, sir.


    Name and affiliation.


    Lord Raymond Saytes, I know I look suspicious, but


    Affiliation.


    I am Gale Hiton. I work for Baron Ein.


    The culprit is Baron Ein.


    Damn it.


    Raymond stepped closer with the gun still pointed at the man, who continued to keep his hands up, on edge.


    Youre not sure. Youre not sure yet. Calm down. If you shoot people recklessly in this ce, you cant take it back.


    For a moment, Raymond gulped, then he asked the man.


    Why did you hit that maid?


    Its just that she was being cheeky, so


    This This!


    At one side, Donna expressed her frustrations. Since Raymond was here now, she seemed to be feelingpletely relieved. But without giving her time to vent, Raymond kicked the mans shin.


    U-Ugh.


    The man groaned and doubled over.


    Speak. Why did you threaten this maid and what connection does she have with the Baron.


    Thats something that you dont have to care about, Sir Kni <i>Huuk!</i>


    How about this? I witnessed you attempting to murder this maid not even a minute ago. And I had to shoot you just to stop you. Would the Baron be able to say anything about that?


    W-W-Wait!


    Donna intervened.


    Raymond grimaced as he looked at the maid. He thought that this maid needed to be questioned as well. He wasnt certain, but perhaps its connected to Carynne. Perhaps, perhaps. Raymonds thoughts were mired with possibilities.


    But, first order of business. This man.


    You, stay back.


    U-Um Im fine.


    Raymond shoved the mans head against the wall and spoke threateningly.


    Theres a lot of murders going on around here.


    What?


    Doesnt it look like I caught you red-handed?


    <i>Hiiik!</i> No, sir! Sir Knight! I-Its just, His Lordship likes that maid, thats all.


    So you were going to drag her back for the Baron to enjoy and then sh her throat?


    W-What?


    All the dead bodies that have been found so far were of young women, their genitals and wombs torn out. Isnt it obvious? Its the work of a perverted fiend.


    Uh


    If you confess here honestly, then you can live. Did the Baron order you to do it? To catch that maid so he could have his fun with her?


    The mans eyes almost flipped over as he quivered.


    No! <i>No!</i> I have nothing to do with that! And His Lordship too!


    Inspector Albert will be very happy with this discovery.


    No, sir! Until now, all of the women have received money as payment. His Lordship likes women, but thats all. Uh You! Tell him right now!


    Donna glowered at the man.


    I kept telling you that I dont want to go, but you said you were going to drag me away.


    F*ck!


    Lets go to the precinct so you can share it in detail, shall we?

 Chapter 78

    Chapter 78


    No, sir! Please Please check my pocket, Ive got a letter sent by His Lordship to Carynne Evans.


    Raymond was using one hand to hold the other mans arms down, while his other hand was holding the gun. Raymond gestured with his chin and ordered Donna.


    You there. Search him.


    Yes? Yes!


    There was a disgusted scowl on Donnas face as she reached into the mans coat pocket, but she eventually pulled out the letter. Even in the dark, Raymond recognized that the owner of that letters seal was Baron Ein.


    Bring it here.


    Donna walked closer, then she showed the piece of paper. As he read the contents of the letter, Raymonds eyes narrowed.


    What do you think?


    Whats written there was exactly as the servant said.


    Baron Ein had written to Carynne with the request of letting her handmaid work at his mansion for a few daysthe baron said that hed pay for what Carynne had lost during the card game in exchange for this. In other words, it was just another roundabout way of prostituting the maid.


    Carynne is this


    Mdy will never agree to this!


    Shit! Hey! You didnt even give it to the recipient!


    Mdy isnt that kind of person, okay? Shes never ever going to agree.


    Anyway, Sir Knight, please let me go now.


    Raymond pulled the gun away from the man.


    Damn, anyway, also please speak about this to Carynne Evans.


    Pardon me.


    Raymond pushed down the urge to sigh and soon rxed his grip on the other man. The servant quickly removed himself from that spot, briskly leaving the alley.


    Baron Ein is the culprit, she said.


    However, even while Raymond himself had threatened the man like that just now, it was still difficult for him to believe that as the truth. Baron Ein didnt have any reputation of him using his lower half recklessly while having fun here and there. Though, this was whats known amongst the nobles.


    Even if he had yed with a few maids in his own house, rumors wouldnt slip out unless the woman he had touched was a noblewoman. His self-restraint was to that degree. But was that just a faade? For decades?


    A noble being a homicidal maniac was something that would attract the attention of practically anyone, but Raymond couldnt clear his doubts.


    People whomit murder tend to be those who had unmet desires. Baron Ein was a noble man who had ownership over a stable territory. He had too much in his possession for him to be doing something like this.


    Still, it was difficult toe to a conclusion. For instance, wasnt Carynne, who had both beauty and promised wealth, exhibiting an inexplicable madness within her?


    E-Excuse me.


    Would it have been better if he stood back and watched the maid get osted rather than helping her? If he believed Carynne, perhaps it would have been better to wait and see, then he could tell Albert about itter. If he would have witnessed the act, the police would have had no choice but to investigate the matter immediately because the witness was a noble.


    Sir Knight?


    Ah, sorry.


    Please dont be sorry. Im grateful for your help, sir.


    Raymond nced down at Donna and felt apologetic. For one moment, he judged that it would have been more convenient if she had died. He was so focused on digging up on Carynne that he kept losing his bnce.


    Lets go back.


    Yes.


    With her head bowed down, Donna started walking by Raymonds side.


    Um Please dont tell her about this.


    What?


    To Lady Carynne, sir


    Donnas voice gradually grew weaker.


    I really dont want to go there.


    Mm.


    Raymond stroked his smooth chin. It was difficult to imagine Carynne prostituting out Donna. Carynne was too young to do such a dirty thing. And it also seemed to him that Donna and Carynne got along quite well.


    Carynne would never do that.


    You truly must love Lady Carynne, sir.


    In this situation, he should say yes.


    He decided to focus on returning to the manor first so that he could question Carynne a little more. He was going to start with the matter of Baron Ein being the culprit. It didnt seem like the case to him.


    But You know, sir


    Mdys circumstances. Everyday, she I mean, if I go, um So you see um Wouldnt Mdy get hit?


    Raymond could tell why Donna was feeling insecure. She was thinking that if Carynne had sold Donna to the baron before, Carynne wouldnt have gottenshed like that.


    Youre a maid, all you have to do is do your job. Youre an employee, not a ve.


    But Lord Raymond, you love Mdy though.


    Should he have appeared to be angry here? Perhaps its just because women wereplex, but Raymond found it difficult to try to understand those mysterious beings.


    Strangely, the bond formed was through an emotional twine. If twisted, its the same kind of sympathy formed towards a victim.


    At the very least, he should also show a degree of affection towards that girl.


    Raymonds worries seem weighed on his mind. It seemed as though he met the wrong woman.


    Whatever happens, this has to be dealt with.


    As her fianc.


    * * *


    Carynne wasnt in her room. So, Donna and Raymond went up to Ises room.


    <i>Knock, knock.</i>


    Mdy?


    No answering sound could be heard. Donna opened the door.


    Mi Mdy?


    Damn it, youre doing all sorts of things.


    Carynne was lying on the floor.


    Hed detest it if he had questioned her and she would faint or cry while saying that she knew nothing. And he also found it unpleasant if he would waver because of that.


    Raymond grimaced as he watched Donna rush to Carynnes side. Its because of that woman that he was doing such futile things.


    Mdy?


    Even in this ce, was he required to make a show of his apparent love for her? Through Carynnes clothes, Raymond caught sight of the open wounds on her back. Blood was soaking the fabric because it still hadnt been properly treated. She should at least be properly given gauze dipped in alcohol first.


    Mdy?


    In Raymonds opinion, Carynne was the one who needed bedrest more than Ise. Raymond took off his gloves and leaned down to get closer to Carynne. He slipped one arm under her neck so he could carry her.


    God damn it.


    W-Whats wrong?


    Call Reverend Dun, <i>now!</i>


    Carynne wasnt breathing.


    * * *


    Raymond woulde here soon. She knew who the culprit was, and she told him. Baron Ein would be caught as the criminal. Would it be like that this time as well? It would be more convenient if thats how it pans out. Carynne closed the door without locking it. She felt blood running down her back. The muddy feeling made her feel terrible. How will it turn out this time?


    Ise, do you trust Sir Raymond?


    Carynne stared at Ise. She did not wake up. She did not fight back. As a corpse and as a rival, she was the loser. Forever. Theres no need for dialogue. Dialogue with Ise was the same as monologue. This, too, was not needed now. She was bored to death just rambling on by herself. Now, her dialogue would be with Raymond.


    <i>Drip, drip.</i>


    The IV fluid trickled. Carynne looked at it vacantly. Then, she took out a new needle.


    If my theory is correct.


    Carynne wondered.


    Who had set the mansion on fire? Until now, it never truly went up in mes. Whenever Carynne tried it before, the servants were quick to put it out. Then, did it get burned down because the servants didnt put out the fire this time?


    Dun.


    And, why wouldnt Ise wake up?


    Even if she escaped until this point, right now, she was bound to be dragged back to the stage.


    Carynne took out the IV drip connected to Ise.


    <i>Jab.</i>


    Carynne jabbed the needle into her own arm. She felt no pain. Darkness met her before pain could.


    <i>THUD.</i>


    * * *


    With an rmed gaze, Raymond looked at Carynne. He snapped back to his senses, so he examined her and found out that she was still breathing. However, her breaths were few and far in between, and her body was cold. The blood trickling from the gashes on her back wouldnt stop flowing either. Her wounds were inadequately disinfected and poorly bandaged, but she wasnt properly treated first. In many ways, she needed a doctor.


    Just what the hell do you want me to do now.


    Just what was he expected to do with this woman, who looked as if only a little bit of force was needed to kill her. This woman who wasnt all there in the head, this woman who was his partner in a political marriage, this woman whod be an adopted daughter.


    This woman, who made a promise of love.


    Theyre runningte.


    While staring at his blood-stained hands, Raymond wondered. He thought that people woulde running right away, but the hallways were quiet. Why wasnt anyoneing yet? In his impatience, Raymond eventually rose to his feet first, but right then, Donna came back to the room, breathing heavily.


    S-Sir Knight.


    Yet, Donna was alone. Donna looked lost as she shifted her weight from one foot to another frantically. Raymond knew that something was wrong.


    Why arent you alone? The Reverend didnte?


    T-That.


    First, tell me. Is he or is he not inside the mansion?


    Hes inside.


    Where?


    In M-Master Verdics room.


    Why isnt heing out?


    I was told that the two of them are working inside


    Move.


    Raymond shoved Donna and went out the hallway. He marched down the main hallway and down the stairs as he asked the maid. Donna followed after him hurriedly. It was a waste of time even trying to ask.


    He hastened his steps. He ran down the corridors and went down the staircase. All the servants and maids stared at Raymond as he ran and ran in a hurry, but strangely, thats all they did. In this entire mansion, only Donna and Raymond were stricken with urgency.

 Chapter 79

    Chapter 79


    Step aside right now.


    Carynne was a suspicious individual. She needed to be investigated. But thats forter.


    Raymond made a quick shake of the head to gesture to the man in front of him. There was arge servant blocking Verdics massive door.


    L-Lord Raymond.


    I said <i>move.</i>


    Master ordered me not to let anyone go inside.


    I just need Reverend Dun toe out. Carynne Evans copsed and shes not breathing properly. She needs a doctor.


    Ill inform him. Please wait here.


    Damn it, tell him toe out <i>now!</i>


    Raymond raised his voice. The servant panicked in the face of an incensed nobleman, but the person who scared him more was his master.


    The servant replied.


    P-Please wait just a moment.


    The servants eyes were filled with fear as he bowed his head to Raymond, then he knocked on the door.


    From inside, a harsh reply was heard. Still with his head bowed down, he entered through the door.


    <i>ck!</i>


    Tell him to leave this instance!


    Along with the shout, there came the sound of someone being hit. Raymond couldnt dy any longer, and so he pushed the door open.


    Y-You cant, sir.


    Another servant tried to stop Raymond. He looked extremely frightened. All the attendants and maids in this house were all like this.


    However, Raymond couldnt care less about them right now. He shoved the servant away roughly and continued to open the door.


    Come out, Reverend Dun. Carynne Evans needs a doctor. She needs your help.


    However, the one who answered wasnt Dun, but Verdic. While his gaze turned to Raymond, Verdic huffed and puffed as he answered.


    Sir Raymond, would you be so kind as to leave my room.


    Reverend.


    When Raymond ignored him, Verdics face went bright red with indignation.


    Sir Raymond Saytes! This is <i>my</i> room! Would you please <i>get out!</i>


    Verdic, the owner of this room, eventually yelled at Raymond, who didnt even look at him. His eyes were entirely focused on Dun, that slender, pale young manthe man who was Carynnes distant rtive and ex-fianc. The man who was rejected by Carynne.


    Dun, the man who currently held the title of Lord Hare.


    With an expressionless face, he made eye contact with Raymond, who then marched towards him.


    Carynne Evans cant breathe. Her bleeding is also severe. You need to take action. As a priest and as a doctor, I ask that you fulfill your duty.


    Sir Raymond! Youre being incredibly rude right now! Please leave!


    Just to shut Verdics mouth, Raymond felt like he could do just about anything. But right now, the priority was to drag Dun out.


    While Dun dithered and fidgeted with his fingers, he opened his lips to speak.


    M-Must, I really go?


    Reverend Dun.


    C-C-Carynne, she, for a long time now, shes always been like that. Its no, nothing for you to be so c-concerned about.


    With his teeth clenched, Raymonds hand shot up and grabbed Dun by the cor. Fuck, fuck, <i>fuck.</i> Curses brimmed just at the tip of his tongue. He did not want to sympathize with this woman, but thats how he felt anyway. At the end of the day, the behavior he was showing right now made it seem like he truly, deeply loved Carynne Evans.


    Reverend Dun. A doctor is taught not to discriminate. If theres a dying person right in front of your eyes, its only right for you to save them. And on top of that, a priest is taught to be a vessel of Gods mercy.


    T-Thats, not what Im thinking.


    Raymond grabbed Dun and dragged him along. Dont judge anything right now. Dont think.


    Yes, why would you think such a thing? You wouldnt think of forsaking your sacred duty, would you?


    Was it because this woman had thrown him away? Raymond had seen many of this type of man. There were a lot of them in the military.


    Whenever those men were just amongst fellow men, they proudly disyed their vulgarity. They dered their intent to take revenge against women, spoke of their sadistic desires to others, and put their negative emotions at the forefront.


    However, if those things were to take precedence over ones duty, then that was uneptable for Raymond.


    With good intentions violently expressed, Raymond drove Dun into a corner.


    Get your hands off him and <i>get out!</i>


    In the background, Verdic continued to shout at Raymond, but it was nothing more than white noise to him. Dun staggered and then replied. Under Raymonds gaze, he cowered.


    T-T-That much wont kill her. It happens whenever s-shes given any shock, and the s, symptoms, are exactly as it appeared this morning.


    This answer did not satisfy Raymond.


    Right now, she cant breathe. Please take a look yourself and examine her.


    I-I-If she isnt d-dying theres n, no reason for me to do so.


    Raymond pushed Dun against a wall. A sound reminiscent of bones cracking could be heard. ring straight into Duns eyes, Raymond hissed.


    Then how about this? If you dont treat my fiance right this instant, Ill make sure to crush you with my own hands.


    RAYMOND!


    Behind Raymond, Verdic roughly grabbed him by the shoulder. However, no matter how much Verdic tried to pull Raymond away, the young mans trained body did not move a single inch.


    With his infuriated gaze looking straight at only Dun, Raymond spoke.


    Just because shes the woman who threw you away, are you thinking that its alright to let her die?


    LeLet go, Sir Knight.


    No.


    Raymond said nothing more. Instead, his hand went straight for Duns neck.


    Then, Ignoring Verdic to the very end, Raymond dragged Dun out of the room just like that.


    What the hell are you doing right now?!


    AHH!


    Shut up. Move.


    <i>BANG!</i>


    L-Let go.


    The servants around them were in a flurry as the door mmed open, but they could not stop Raymond.


    Before leaving the room, Raymond looked behind him once and red at Verdic.


    Mister Verdic.


    Raymond


    Ive returned more than triple of my debt to you. And even after Miss Ise was reduced to that state, I held my end of the contract.


    Ha, right now, just take a look at what youre doing to me.


    Carynne Evans is now your daughter and my fiance. Do respect this.


    My daughter is!


    I trust that you know.


    And when the two young men left through the door, Verdic remained alone in that room.


    How dare.


    Fuming, Verdics anger couldnt be contained. Blood rushed up and blurred his vision. Even until the very end, Raymond looked down on him.


    How dare. How dare you, when youre merely a defective product that I bought for my daughter. That defective product is looking down on me right now. How dare! Raymond, that goddamn scoundrel!


    Up until now, Verdic had extended so much grace to Raymond, and yet.


    How dare you, to me


    Verdic clenched his hands into fists. His breaths were rough. Around him, the mess that was his room was straightened up.


    Raymond Saytes did not know just what Verdic was capable of just yet. Verdic had lost in any business deal. Raymond would have to return everything that he had ever received from Verdic.


    His wealth, his love, even his life.


    * * *


    Its just a case of a-acute shock.


    After Raymond forcefully dragged Dun out and led him to Carynnes sickbed, the priest had no choice but to examine her. If Raymond had seen even the slightest hint of resistance in Dun, he would have resorted to violence. However, he didnt need to. Dun slowly and carefully treated Carynne, and he got up only after disinfecting and bandaging the wounds on her back.


    Why have youe to that conclusion?


    I b-believe she took the w-wrong medicine.


    While standing by Carynnes bed, Dun exined to Raymond.


    From n-now on, Ill make s-sure that she wont nurse I-Ise Evans anymore. Because shes n-not getting the right medication.


    In the end, this situation became fortunate for Carynne. Raymond nced down at her. After Dun gave her an injection, color immediately returned to herplexion and she started breathing morefortably.


    In Raymonds perspective, Carynne had too much work on her te. She was doing physicalbor during the day, then she had to attend social gatherings at night. On top of it all, she was even whipped. How could she not go a little mad from that.


    While thinking that it would be better to take her to another doctor for a second opinion, Raymond let out a sigh. He chose the wrong woman. As she slept like this, she looked her age. All this time, to him, it felt as if she was an unfathomable being.


    After the examination was finished, awkwardness filled the silence. Raymond disliked being caught up. If someone had a problem, wasnt it up to <i>them</i> to solve it? Rather than this, he would have been morefortable challenging the other man to a duel while saying, <i>How dare you, towards my woman!</i>


    But the oue is so obvious that theres no need.


    If his opponent was Dun, Raymond wouldnt even need to pull out a gun. Moreover, it felt a bit shameful and awkward to be rivals at love with Dun.


    Reverend Dun.


    Yes.


    Whenever Carynne talked about Verdic in front of Raymond, all that left her lips was her angerher resentmentagainst the man. On the other hand, she said not a word about Dun. Dun was even staying here at the Evans mansion as Ises guest, and yet he and Carynne never sought to meet each other. They just maintained that awkward rtionship.


    Reverend Dun, towards Carynne Evans, do you Mm, well. Do you love her? Ah, I mean Um Do you hate me?


    Dun remained silent. Raymond sighed. Did they need to duke it out in a duel after all?


    I believe we share an alliance. I respect Carynne Evans. Thats why please dont hate her. Shes the one wholl decide who shell love, and I wont interfere. I hope youll do the same, Reverend.


    After everythings done and over with, thats when shell choose. Truly, Raymond had no intention of getting caught up any more than this.


    Sir Raymond. Youre a good man.


    Dun answered as though he was chewing on the words. So many things could be read from his expression.

 Chapter 80

    Chapter 80


    * * *


    Is that so.


    There was a voice in the dark. Even if she tried to get used to this sensation, she never could. The disintegration of awareness, the muddling sensation of confusion. No matter who it was, they would feel how this tiredness slowly inched closer to the feeling of death itself.


    In a space where even ones awareness had copsed, where everything was blurred, the first thing that came to her mind was just how tired she was.


    Ah, Im so tired.


    If only I can stay like this, if only I dont open my eyes again. But again, light woulde, and I would open my eyes. I cant breathe. Who is it this time.


    Please, just leave me alone.


    That inscrutable voice. Whos strangling me? Im confused. The smell of medicine, the smell of gunpowder, and the smell of perfume. It hurts. My head is spinning. Im lying down and my eyes are closed, but Im so dizzy. In this cold, dark space, the first to disintegrate was ones mind.


    As expected to be the case.


    A cold hand touched my forehead. A chill was left upon my brow. It must be a human beings hand, but it was so cold. Fathers hands were warm. But they must be cold now. Him, my father, a man who became a corpsein search of love, he left. Really, Mother, youre so enviable. After all that, Mother found love, and perhaps Mothers mother


    As for tonights appointment, its better to go alone, so


    Rest, he said? In the meantime, Carynne felt her consciousness clearing up at the mention of a broken appointment. Was she allowed to continue sleeping?


    Her fever has gone down.


    She heard a familiar voice right above her head. The owner of that voice had been avoiding her for a while now, but here you are, finally dragged out. Youre a fief lord now, but youre still a doctor. Thats why youre a lost cause.


    Thank you for your hard work.


    Then, the sound of a door closing.


    Ah.


    So thats what it was.


    She ended up copsing. She was working in Ises room, then thest thing she could remember was the floor getting closer and closer. And, the reason as to why that happened was clear to her as well.


    I-If youvee to your senses then just g-get up already.


    Carynne stared at Ise, who was on the bed next to hers. Carynnes room wasnt equipped with the proper medical resources for her treatment, so now she was lying next to Ise.


    She caught sight of her own arm, where a needle that was the same as Ises was embedded. However, the IV fluid was different. See, Carynne was awake, and Ise was still asleep.


    Carynne raised her arm and waved it at Dun.


    We both know why I fainted.


    As soon as she jabbed that needle into her arm, she immediately felt her vision start spinning. She had used thest of her remaining strength to soften her fall.


    Now she was certain. Dun was the one who brought Ise out of that burning mansion, but he was also the one who was keeping her unconscious.


    Whatll you do if Mister Verdic finds out?


    With a forced smile on her lips, Carynne looked up at Dun. Just hearing that she had spent his money on gambling like that was enough reason for Verdic to whip and tear her skin to shreds.


    What would Verdic do the moment hed find out that Dun, who he had been relying on until now, was the one who put his daughter in that state to begin with?


    Carynne had no doubt that hed pick up that axe again.


    Dun kept his mouth shut as he nced down at Carynne. Then, he answered.


    W-W-Well see each other again next year, o-of course.


    The answer wasnt what she thought shed hear. Carynne had been clutching the nket on top of her until then, but it soon slipped out of her loosened grasp. That answer was something she never would have expected.


    All too naturally, he answered in a way that acknowledged her repeated returns. His words did not hold his sense of responsibility as a priest and as a doctor. Even Carynnes father had shown his doubts until the bitter end.


    As though he had not a single shred of doubt about this, the apparent certainty seen on Duns countenance made Carynne speechless. How could he believe it so entirely? What should she do now?


    She was taken aback by the answer that was much too calm. However, her anger red quietly within. Putting her all into smiling at the man, she opened her lips.


    Oh my. Now thats astonishing.


    Should she go ahead and strangle Dun? Contemting, Carynne eyed Duns long, slender neck. When their eyes met, Dun tucked his neck as he cowered.


    Carynne pointed at Ise and asked.


    Why are you keeping Miss Ise unconscious?


    You, you tried to kikill her.


    Yeah.


    T-This woman did n-nothing wrong. She, doesnt deserve to d-die.


    Carynnes eyes went wide. His answer was strange.


    Do you love Miss Ise? Mmh, no, that doesnt sound right. Fine. Miss Ise is innocent. But she has to die. Mm First, she believes that Imitted murder And her shoulder, I pricked it. Once she wakes up, shes going to kill me. Thats why I wanted to kill her.


    Hearing Carynnes response, Dun stammered back a reply.


    I-I know. Thats why I kept her unconscious. L-Leave her alone. Right now, this woman h-has left the ststage.


    As Dun nced coldly down at Ise, it was difficult to assume that it was the gaze of either a saint or a man in love. Nevertheless, Dun made it sound like he had been keeping Ise asleep just to protect her from Carynne. Even if hed be in danger of getting killed by Verdic. The dubious good deed disgusted Carynne.


    Noticing the look in Carynnes eyes, Dun spoke.


    Y-You dont need to know the story.


    Y-Youre going to start over anyway. I-Im just watching b-behind the scenes like this.


    Dun replied to Carynne like so. His words were contradictory. His deed right now was both good and evil at the same time. Supposedly for the sake of protecting Ise from Carynne, he made the gitose.


    However, he had no doubts about his actions. He just had this vague attitude of If you want me to, Ill do it. Or, Ill sort it out, but I wont be proactive about it.


    Like someone who wasnt on the stage, just someone in the audience. <i>You cant do this and that, but thats not allowed either, and that, too, cant be done. Oh, no, thats too far.</i> He had that kind of meddling attitude.


    Did he feel that this was an obligation of his as a priest? But if he truly, utterly believed it, maybe he wouldnt have gone only this far.


    Carynne looked at Ise. She took out the pair of scissors hidden beneath a pillow, and while staring at Dun, she pointed the scissors right at Ises pale neck.


    Then dont stop me from killing Miss Ise either. If you believeif you truly believe that Ive been repeating the same life, then my sins will mean nothing in the end. You cannot stop me.


    For those who have stolen, offermb.


    For those who havemitted adultery, offer three young cattle.


    For those who have assaulted another, offer a young mare.


    For those who have murdered, offer your own life to atone for your sins.


    The only price a murderer can offer is his own death.


    But what if the act of murder meant nothing? Carynne wondered about that. She was incapable of sinning. All of this was pure entertainment. Thats why she did all of that and felt no remorse at all. She had no regrets.


    So, Carynne asked Dun.


    Have I sinned?


    Dun shook his head.


    Then dont stop me.


    Yet still, Dun grabbed Carynnes arm. He still stopped her. Dun looked perplexed. However, the grip of his hand was strong.


    If you believe, you have no reason to stop me.


    B-But you dont have a reason to kill e-either.


    The reason is simple. Im bored. Alright, <i>you</i> die then.


    H-How?


    He answered unhesitatingly.


    And because of this, Carynne was sure now.


    Got you.


    Dun really believes.


    I-In what way, do you want to d-do it?


    It seemed as though Dun still hadnt realized what subtext his words carried.


    Let alone harbor love for her, Dun considered Ise to be insignificant, and yet he was not afraid to die in ce of her. Even if Carynne didnt feel like killing someone here, this much was certain. Dun believes. Very much so.


    It wasnt because Dun was a saint, and neither was it due to love. Its just that he was a man full of conviction.


    You. What do you know?


    Carynne clutched Duns arm. He tried to shake off her grip, but she held him firmly. You think you can get away?


    What do you <i>know?</i>

 Chapter 81

    Chapter 81


    I know n-nothing.


    Dun bowed his head. He looked like a kid who had done something wrong. He averted his eyes, but Carynnes hold on him got tighter as she pressed him.


    Dont make meugh. Its impossible that you dont know anything. Theres no way youd be so sacrificial for nothing. You cant just believe! <i>What</i> do you even believe? What the hell are you so sure of?!


    I-I-I know nothing!


    Dun!


    Carynne stood up. The scissors ttered to the floor. She knew that it wouldnt have posed any threat to Dun. So, she rushed at Dun and clung to him. Right then, he looked like he wanted to run away from her. But he couldnt shake her off.


    What is it that you want? Do you want to sleep with me? Is it my bodydo you lust for my body? Okay, lets do it, however many times you want. No, maybe, is it money? Ill give you as much money as you want. Okay? Please tell me what you know. Anything at all, please tell me. Even if all you know are just guesses, even if its just <i>one </i>thing, please, tell me. If you want, okay, in this iteration, lets get married. Ah, but maybe the situation wont permit it? Alright, okay, let me kill Ise. And then you can take me back to the parish. People dont get arrested when theyre on sacred ground. Bring me there and y with me all you want, thats good, too. If not that, okay, my dead body. You can go ahead and y with that. Just tell me any


    P-Pull yourself together.


    Do I look like I can?


    Finally, at this moment, the clue that she wanted to hear came up!


    D-Dont act like a whwhore. Y-You dont even lolove me.


    Carynnes mouth gaped open as she heard Duns answer. Speechless. Absolutely taken aback. What are you talking about? You said you believe, but what the hell are you talking about right now? When were already at this point?


    Dun, Dun. Darling. No way Are you being serious? You, right now. Do you think that you or Raymond or anyone elsedo you think that <i>any</i> of you matter to me, truly? Do you think that its still important for me to get with some <i>guy?</i> Are you that big of a moron?


    Carynne grabbed Dun by the cor and tightened her grip.


    Say whatever you want to say. No, I mean, <i>please</i> tell me. Ill do whatever you want. Ill get you whatever you want.


    Let me die, please.


    Duns expression became distorted. It was like hes looking at something horrifyingly grotesque. But Carynne noticed. Despite it all, his thing down there was getting excited as their bodies were pressed together. Would you look at that. In the end, your words and your actions are different. Its like that even in this situation.


    Carynne reached down and touched him, then she smiled. If its her body he wanted, then thats a cheap price to pay.


    However, Dun pushed Carynne away.


    D-D-Dont be like this.


    Why?


    T-T-This This.


    You want to do it with me though.


    His words were always the direct opposite to what his body wanted. Hed say how contemptible such acts were, but he was a lustful man anyway. He was like this in the past, and hes still like this in the present. Carynne knew Dun well. The best way to get through to him was with her body.


    I-I-I do not!


    Dun pushed Carynne away roughly. The look he had on his face right now was almost akin to a virgin girl whos getting assaulted. Seeing this, Carynne was dumbfounded.


    He scrambled away from Carynne and straightened his clothes. He was panting. It even looked like tears were about to form around his eyes.


    How annoying.


    Carynne pressed down the urge to tear out all of Duns hair. The very first thing she should have done was to torture Dun to death. In the next life, she now nned to ambush Dun while he was asleep.


    Lets hold it in right now.


    Y-You dont love anyone ddo you.


    It was a question that did not seek an answer. Dun covered his face with his hands.


    I-I-It must be like that until n-now.


    Stop talking about boring things. Take off your clothes. Or do you want to keep them on?


    With his body shaking convulsively, Dun crossed his arms over himself and held himself. He shuddered and stammered as he spoke.


    I-I-I still dont know anything. But if you atone ande to l-love someone


    What?


    If, if you f-fall in love, t-true love


    Still covering his face, Dun stuttered.


    Ill, Ill tell you eve, everything I kn-know right, now. You s-seem so t-tired.


    Carynne had to stop the urge to scoff at his face here. Like Catherine, like Carynnes father, was Dun still ying along and acting like this was a romance novel? She strode closer to Dun and spoke.


    Hey, cut the bullshit.


    Just hurry up and sleep with me, then tell me what you know. If you want to tell it to me for free, then thats good, too.


    However, Dun was still cowering in one corner and covering his face. It almost seemed as though he was crying. His entire body was trembling. Carynne felt dirty, as if shed be some bloke whos harassing a halfwit. Who here wronged whom?


    N-N-Not me.


    Ha.


    Not me.


    Dun took his hands off his face. Contrary to what she previously thought, Dun didnt cry. Rather, his expression was stiffas hard as a corpse.


    D-Dont forget. You have to fall in love to the extent that it can be acknowledged.


    * * *


    Raymond lowered his gun.


    Carynne did not kill Dun. Neither did she kill Ise. This was enough. Theres no reason to kill Carynne now. Raymond recalled his conversation with Dun.


    S-She has not sinned.


    What must he do here.


    Raymond hated the chaotic situation that he found himself in. He just wanted everything to be clear. Once tomorrow woulde, they would need to talk more. Carynne was too risky to interrogate. He thought that perhaps it would be better to bring her to a rtively safer ce and observe her. But his mansion was too far away. He mulled over where a safe ce might be. Which household must he ask a favor from.


    There was no need to kill her. At least, for now.


    Raymond unloaded the gun.


    * * *


    I dislikeplicated things.


    Thats great. Me, too.


    Carynne rubbed the sleep out of her eyes as she greeted Raymond, who knocked on her window ever since dawn. After she talked to Dun, who ordered but not ordered her to fall in love, her mind became aplicated mess, so she answered like that. She greeted him with a nk expression.


    Pardon me for visiting adys room so early in the morning.


    I did it to you before as well.


    Thats true.


    Carynne rubbed her eyes once more and closed the window.


    How is your back?


    Not so good. Still better than yesterday thought. I drank quite a lot of medicine.


    Thats a relief.


    Yes. I heard that you brought Dun out when he was still with Mister Verdic. Thank you.


    As she recalled what Donna excitedly told her earlier, Carynne bowed her head.


    Fall in love.


    And, she recalled what Dun said. But was it possible? She started seeing this timelines Raymond under the premise of a mutual endeavor to take revenge against Verdic, but even in the past, she could tell that Raymond approached Carynne intentionally.


    No way. Maybe in the past, Raymond never truly loved Carynne, thats why she was still stuck in this endlessly repeating life?


    Once again, Carynne agonized over herplicated thoughts, but Raymond called her name. So, she raised her head.


    Carynne.


    Yes.


    I hateplicated things.


    Yes.


    Thats why, please just tell it to me straight.


    And so, Carynne decided to ask directly.


    Sir Raymond, do you love me?


    The sight of Raymonds reaction made Carynne crack a smile.


    Are you mad?


    Ah, I knew it.


    Shes definitely awake. As Carynne shook her head, she wrapped her quilt around her and sat on the bed. The window was open earlier, so the air had turned chilly for Carynne, who had just woken up.


    With a nod, she implored.


    Please say you love me.


    Why?


    Just for the sake of it.


    I love you, Carynne.


    Please say that again in front of Dun.


    You are a very cruel woman.


    A curse word was uttered. Raymonds expression was stained with near abhorrence. As expected, the best ever thing to do was to torture Dun.


    Sir Raymond! Please torture Dun!


    Send Carynne Evans to the insane asylum. She is a prime suspect and must be punished severely.


    Yeah, that might be how itd go, right?


    What the hell was the best answer.

 Chapter 82

    Chapter 82


    Clicking her tongue, Carynne decided on her answer. She hoped that what shed say would sound normal.


    Sir Raymond, as I saidst time, I continue to live again and again. Thats what I believe.


    Ah Yes


    Raymond answered begrudgingly, and as Carynne observed his face, she asked.


    Tell me honestly, what are you thinking about?


    I wouldnt have decided to hold your hand if I knew you were crazy.


    Oh my, thats a bit regrettable.


    She thought that this was how it would have also been in the past anyway. Contrary to what others thought, Carynne knew that Raymond was coldhearted. Raymond was warm and kind only to Carynne. And flipping that supposition over, it could be said that Raymond acted coy only to Carynne.


    She thought that torturing Dun would be the easiest way to get a hint. However, Dun would protect himself, and Raymond wouldnt move ording to her wishes. Apart from all that, Carynne wasnt sure what kinds of threats would work against Dun, who already showed that he thought little of death.


    Carynne.


    Yes.


    Please tell me.


    Sir Raymond, in my repeated past lives, weve married each other many times.


    Um, yes


    Time and again, you told me you loved me and told me that youd remember me. But that promise has yet to be fulfilled, not even once.


    I see.


    Raymond clenched his hands into fists. Suppressedughter could be seen in his expression. If Carynne hadnt done such a thing at the Hare mansion before, Raymond would haveughed out loud at this point.


    Thats what he did in the past. Heughed, then he kissed her, saying that he would love her again. But if she looked at him now, oh, she wondered.


    Carynne sighed.


    I expected you to react like that, so Ive been thinking.


    What are you talking about?


    I knew youd look at me like that. Im not crazy, okay?


    He continued to have a look that said, How should I respond to that? Raymond, too, let out a sigh.


    Alright.


    What exactly are you alright with?


    As I said, I dont likeplicated things. And Im not willing to break my promise either.


    Carynne answered vacantly. He was handling this as a soldier would.


    Efficient. Thats good.


    So then, please gamble against Baron Ein again and make another bet. Your maid was shaking when I found her. Definitely and thoroughly crush him in a game so that no one could dispute the oue.


    My back is still


    Use my money.


    Then, Raymond took out a pouch. Its weight sank down on Carynnes bed. Staring at the pouch full of gold coins, Carynnemented.


    This is your sry for one whole year, Sir Raymond.


    This money was quite literally earned through blood and sweat. It was a small sumpared to what hed earn as a member of the Assembly in the future, but it was quite a shame to spend this much, especially as he had just recently paid Verdic back.


    Yes. Use that as a wager. Please win using this money. Then, I will trust you and help you with anything, no matter what. And I hope that you wont continue making crass jokes about dead bodies or whichever else.


    Still though, the people wholl die, <i>will</i> die. They havent even


    Stop. Ive since attached someone to Baron Ein. Any strange behavior has yet to be confirmed. Honestly, I dont believe you, but If you y a game of cards with Baron Ein again and youll beat him, Ill help you. Thats a promise.


    Carynne epted Raymonds proposition.


    * * *


    The hall buzzed with everyones incredulous chatter. This was impossible.


    Carynne closed her eyes. She hadnt tried it this way before. A faint sense of excitement tingled from her fingertips. She had already gotten fed up with card games decades ago. But again, this time, she couldnt believe that she was getting thrilled by mere pieces of paper.


    I just want to be sure. Wont you regret it? the baron asked.


    Are you not confident?


    With a twist of ones mouth, Baron Einughed. It was unbing of an adult like him to have fallen for the provocation of someone as young as Carynne, but he would have be even more of aughingstock if hed refuse now aftering this far.


    Carynne looked at the people around her. She saw Crown Prince Gueuze some distance away. See, eventually, she would meet the people she needed to meet. Counts, dukes, even royalty.


    She picked up a card. Theres no need for her to look at it. Theres no need to worry about whether she was going to win or not. Theres no need to think about appealing to Raymonds sympathy or about how she could get more answers.


    Here was one answer: Carynne wins, and Baron Ein loses.


    Ill settle with these cards.


    Some nobles watching in the audience snickered at Carynnes stupidity, while others clicked their tongues at Baron Ein. However, some were also looking forward to the oue.


    So youre not going to look at the card?


    I dont even have to look. Ive decided to leave it all to chance.


    You must think of me as a joke.


    Just for todays game, I even woke up at dawn to pray.


    Carynne smiled and opened the card. Theres no need to check. Carynne had been reading all the numbers thus far. And this was a bet that Raymond hadid out. In order to make him believe herin order to get his helpthe man in front of her had to lose.


    The cards were opened.


    Baron Eins expression grew stiff first, then, a forced smile. And finally


    Its my score, she said.


    He shouted.


    NNo, <i>no!</i>


    Baron Eins face turned gray.


    Carynne won 77 times over.


    Its a bankruptcy, a realplete bankruptcy. Baron Ein wouldnt be able to pay this off with just his money alonehe would be forced to sell even his mansion.


    With hisplexion goingpletely ashen, Baron Ein scattered the cards on the table.


    TThis is a scam! Its invalid! This is impossible! Everyone saw!


    Baron Ein.


    Y-Y-You scoundrel Raymond! You nned this, didnt you? You and your fiance nned this, huh? This doesnt make sense!


    Goodness gracious, Baron Ein. Please just ept your loss.


    Behind her fan, Countess Elva smirked and threw sarcasm at the man. After she had been robbed of a fortune by Baron Ein before, seeing him be so helpless like this was just too funny to her.


    Ridiculous! Everyone Everyone saw, right? Isnt this absolutely impossible?!


    Its quite amazing, really


    How did she do that?


    She really does take after her mother.


    She definitely cheated.


    Honestly, since she didnt even look at the card


    Gosh, was she too drunk on her victory? Carynne shrugged and looked for Raymond. Everyone else didnt matter anymore. Carynne won the wager. And now, she would receive her prize: Raymonds trust.


    However, with all these people around her, she couldnt find him.


    How the hell did she do that?


    Carynne? Lady Catherines daughter?


    After that, one time with me


    An excited crowd closed in on Carynne, who in turn became suffocated by so many people.


    T-This is impossible. Impossible!


    As Baron Ein continued to shout, he looked entirely pathetic, nobody paid attention to him. Win or lose, Carynne was the one in the spotlight here.


    Everyone weed her victory. After all, it was an interesting story to tell. Carynne greeted people here and there as she was passed off to one person and another. In the end, she was only able to rx after Raymond swooped in to save her from that ce.


    And, Raymond promised to believe her.


    This was the prize.


    * * *


    Pack up. You dont have to be shackled to Mister Verdic anymore.


    Are youpletely turning your back on him now?


    Yes. I have to take responsibility for you now, too.


    Its like were two lovers eloping.


    I suppose so.


    Carynneughed. And, she had no luggage. Her belongings here were all Verdics anyway. Only the maids packed their bags.


    Lets go. Right now Mister Verdic and I have really be enemies, he added.


    Carynne took Raymonds hand. For a moment, he was surprised by this, but he soon wrapped his hand over Carynnes. Then, she deliberately turned his head to re at the Evans mansion.


    Verdic was looking down at them from behind one window. By the looks of his face, he was positively seething. She wondered if shed see Dun, but he was nowhere to be found.


    Would Raymond be able to give her true love?


    She didnt know. But for Carynne, that was now important. At the very least, shed have to mimic it so that Dun would acknowledge it.


    Raymonds hand was warm. She quite liked this. He was still Carynnes knight, and he rescued her from Verdic.


    Everyone was under the impression that Raymond was in love with Carynne. Sooner orter, Dun would think so, too.


    <em>t/n: Resetting Lady is about to have a manhwa adaptation!! Launch date: August 8 </em>

 Chapter 86

    Chapter 86


    Prince Lewis was the same age as Lady Lianne. If she was going to be the princes consort, then she would be walking down a flower path where shed experience only good things.


    Though regardless of whether that would really happen, the gathering was a gathering of high nobles. Even as the children were still young, they knew about how they needed to start getting closer to each other from now on. Conversely, no matter how much wealth Verdic manages to build up, he would never be able to rise up the ranks and be part of the nobilitys inner circle.


    I thought about it again, but I really dont think Im worthy of attending such a gathering. What should I do, Madam?


    In any case, its an opportune gathering. But it wasnt a ce where Carynne fit in. Crown Prince Gueuze had called for Carynne several times in the past, but never to this kind of gathering. He often summoned her to ces that were rampant with gambling and women, and it would end with him just roving his eyes at her. But this time, he was asking her toe to an official gathering?


    Countess Elva interpreted Carynnes reluctance as nervousness, and so sheforted the younger woman with a bright smile.


    Its fine, its fine. In any case, youll be able to get a lot of advice for when you have your own childter. You can hear about how to get a nanny, a good governess, and so on. Youll be married soon, and youll have to prioritize having a baby right awayitll be toote to receive advice by then.


    It wasnt a matter of the crown prince taking a liking to Carynne or not. The problem was the unnatural invitation to this gathering. Thus far, he never once summoned her to such a bright gathering. It was always to a ce full of gambling and women, to aparatively loose gathering of people while they werent segregated by ss or gender.


    You look like Catherine.


    That was all.


    Its still too soon I dont have a child yet.


    Why was he calling to meet her so fast this time? Was gambling with Baron Ein the trigger? Or did she catch his eye because she became Verdics adopted daughter? Maybe his interest was piqued because her father died? If not


    Is it rted to Mother?


    Perhaps. Its a well-known fact that His Highness had been quite enamored with Lady Catherine back in the day So its no wonder that hes curious about the Ladys daughter. Oh my, that sounds positively romantic. Surely he views you in a good light.


    Well, that had never been the case all this time. Carynne looked down at her teacup, troubled. This was a good opportunity for her, she knew. Because shed personally be able to find out more about Catherine. If things were like how it was before, it would be difficult to make contact with him. Theres nothing wrong with being acquainted with a man high up on the socialdder.


    Its something to be grateful about, of course


    In this life, everything was progressing at a gradually hastened pace. Theres nothing strange about that. She had always experienced changes to this extent.


    Will His Highness Gueuze attend as well?


    He would, if he wanted to see Carynne. However, Countess Elva lilted her head to the side and wondered.


    Hm, Im not so sure about that. Maybe he wouldnt again this time? Prince Lewis usually hosts the gatherings, even at his young age.


    Carynne, Carynne. You know, about His Highness Lewis. Hes very smart.


    Next to Carynne, Lady Lianne shared this about the prince as she stared into the air with dreamy eyes. How precocious. Looking at her daughter with a pleased expression, Countess Elva patted Lady Lianne, who had a big crush on the prince.


    Of course, His Highness Lewis is so mature that I dont think therell be any problems.


    With the way theyre letting a ten-year-old kid host an aristocratic gathering like this, it seemed as if this country would soon be ruined, huh. Carynneughed at the thought, but Countess Elva and Lady Lianne continued to smile and talk about how they believed in Prince Lewis very much.


    * * *


    Are you still worried about it?


    Raymond saw how Carynne had set aside the catalogue as she was immersed in her thoughts. He stopped writing on his document as well.


    Carynne let go of the fabric and sighed.


    I dont know what I should wear to a kids gathering.


    You did say that youve lived for a hundred years. What were you up to during that time?


    I was in love.


    Ah I see.


    Oh my. Sir Raymond, if you were to live and die 100 times over, what would you do?


    To Carynnes question, Raymond shrugged and replied without hesitation.


    Isnt it obvious? I will strive for world peace.


    Are you joking?


    Who knows. But what I dont understand is how youve lived this long but youre still worrying about something like that. Its happening two dayster. And its not like its a banquet meant for the selection of the Crown Princes brideits just a gathering. I mean, even if it is, is it not too much for you to worry about this for a week? You left me alone with all this work.


    Raymond nced over at the fabric sample catalogue that Carynne was holding earlier. In response, Carynne stuck her tongue out.


    The catalogue was as thick as the countess. Most of the avable fabric could be seen inside. Its tough to make decisions.


    Carynne wagged a finger as an answer.


    You still dont know whats important here, huh. In the end, isnt this the most important thing for me? Hes Catherines ex. And, to top it off, hes the countrys crown prince. Its a meeting that shes never had the opportunity to have before. Beauty is a womans weapon, and clothes are a womans army. Shouldnt I prepare this much to ensure victory?


    Its my first time attending this gathering. And Sir Raymond, why, are you worried about me?


    Its only natural. Were tied by contract. Hearing you say that makes it feel as if my heart is being ripped apart.


    At what Carynne said, Raymond theatrically and emotionally clutched a hand over his heart. A big smile graced her lips.


    In any case, victory is guaranteed anyway.


    Um, thats a littleforting to hear.


    Are you noting, Sir Raymond? Did somethinge up?


    With a subtle smile, Raymond replied.


    Try to guess. You know the future, after all.


    There wasnt a time that we were together during this part.


    Carynne discontentedly threw out the excuse, but as she saw his smile grow wider, she forced herself to think.


    Mmh, if you have somewhere to be It must be a military operation. The events have been pushed up a bit, but thats usually what you do when you have to go around this time.


    Isnt that something that anyone could piece together?


    Around this time, youll be called to test a gun with a silencer for the first time. And you went to do something you didnt want to do. But youll be back in three days.


    What exactly happened?


    You never told me.


    Is that so? Well, anyway, its obvious what a soldier is meant to do.


    Raymond nervously swept up his loose bangs. Carynne now felt a bit awkward about choosing a dress. But that didnt necessarily mean theres nothing she could do for him.


    I wish you coulde with me. Itll help with the future, too.


    It would have still been difficult to apany you had I not been called to duty. The invitation is obviously only for you.


    Is that what you think so, too, Sir Raymond?


    Thats what made it more ufortable. Even if only the man was invited, its not umon for his fiance to apany him to that event. However, it would be unusual for a man to go to a ce where only women were invited. This subtlety within etiquette was a nuisance.


    Sir Raymond. Do you think Crown Prince Gueuze will show up?


    It seems to me like he will. But I dont think thats a good thing.


    Have you heard anything about him?


    Briefly Ive run into him a couple of times. Here and there.


    Raymond didnt want to speak about it, so this was all he said. Carynne stared at him for a moment, but she soon spoke.


    I heard he followed around my mother before.


    He must have been momentarily swayed by her face.


    Are you talking about yourself?


    I have no response to that.


    Anyway, what do you know about him?


    Most men wouldnt want to introduce their woman to him.


    Isnt that something that anyone could piece together?


    As his own words were flung back at him, Raymond shook his head.


    I dont want to hear that from a woman like you.


    Oh my, are you criticizing me?


    No, no. Nothing like that.


    Raymond waved a hand at Carynne. He looked a little flustered.


    Um, hes not someone who has a good record when ites to women.


    Can you be more specific?


    Mm Why do you think Crown Prince Gueuze summoned you?


    Because hes my mothers ex-lover, so he must be curious about me?


    Outside that.


    He hates me?


    No, not you. Me.


    Raymond pointed to his own chest.


    He hates me.

 Chapter 87

    Chapter 87


    Uh Sir Raymond, what did you do to garner that treatment? If you receive an order from your superior, its only right to obey. And the other persons a royal, too.


    You havent even heard what he did, but youre saying that?


    Regardless, whatever it is!


    Hes a soldier, and yet hes saying this. Carynne stared at Raymond after hearing him say those dumbfounding words. Then again, it looked like Raymond genuinely loathed Crown Prince Gueuze.


    I dont know, really. To be quite honest, if I was him, rather than wanting to see the daughter of my first love out of curiosity, I would have preferred to have a daughter with my first love instead.


    It was a realistic hypothetical guess. Carynne couldnt say anything back. So, Raymond continued.


    And at the same time, I dont have a good feeling about how he gave me work with this timing.


    Raymond looked alternately between the invitation and themand detail that he had been sent.


    You have nothing but a terrible rtionship with Mister Verdic, and Countess Elva is treating you as a mere essory.


    Putting one envelope on top of the other, Raymond then said.


    There will be no one to protect you if I die.


    Silence ensued for a long time after that, and he just red at the two envelopes.


    Sir Raymond, Sir Raymond?


    Carynne called him as she waved a hand in front of Raymonds eyes. At this, he looked up and made eye contact with her.


    If I die, Ive made it so that my pension will go to you, but Goodness, you have way more money than I do now. Still, just use the pension for your living expenses. Dont buy things like that.


    He pointed a finger at the antiques that Carynne had bought.


    Oh, would you look at this?


    Carynnes brows knitted together, and she reached forward to take Raymonds hand.


    You know, Sir Raymond.


    Yes.


    In the end, you dont believe me, huh. Still, try and believe me this time.


    She ced a hand over his cheek and pinched it hard. She liked this facethis one that had a slightly dazed expression. Now that she thought about it, he also used to pinch her cheeks like this. Carynne smiled.


    Youre not going to die.


    If youre just trying tofort me


    You wont die. Absolutely not.


    She pinched harder and stretched his cheek. It would be funny if hed get a bruise from this.


    Carynne said this with certainty. This was a prophecy. It was a truth that would not change no matter what. He would not die. No matter what danger hed face.


    Dont worry. You wont ever die.


    Until the day that I die.


    If nothing happens, then that would be great.


    Raymond watched as Carynne retracted her hand, stroking his tingling cheek.


    * * *


    Please rx.


    Huuk ugh Do it gently Ah Wait!


    Just a little more!


    Please


    Just a little until the end!


    Had her stomach turned upside down now? Carynne clenched her teeth as the corset was tightened around her. She did certainly eat a lot before this. Back when she was at the Evans mansion, she had too many things going on so she couldnt eat well, but nowadays, shed be too indolent.


    A short, but peaceful moment. The days that passed by were beautiful. However, was this tranquil period fattening her up?


    Carynne gulped. No way.


    Did I gain some weight?


    Huh? No, not at all. Youve been too slender all this time, Mdy. Even now, you need to gain more weight.


    Donna refuted what Carynne said and shook her head. Still, Carynne sighed and looked into the mirror, at her pale face. As expected, shes been a slothtely. She kept thinking over and over how she could seduce Raymond, and yet that goal might be out of reach now.


    And really, she might have made the wrong first move. Lately, she had just been trying to look for traces of her mother, but she hadnt made any progress so far.


    I knew it. Ive been too indolent.


    Carynne med herself. Beauty was Carynnes best weapon. Raymond wouldnt have approached her had she not been beautiful. Donnas jealousy wouldnt have been aroused had she not been beautiful. Countess Elva wouldnt have taken pity and given her favor had she not been beautiful.


    She couldnt believe she had be so neglectful after just getting one tiny clue. While berating herself, Carynne put on her shoes, which were made of cloth and fit her perfectly, unlike the shoes that had been made for Ise.


    Her injury was also almost healed now. Because she hadnt been wearing heels while she was next to Raymond.


    Come to think of it, wasnt she living too much of a rxed life now? Wasnt she being toockadaisical around Raymond?


    What have we even done together that Im thisx around him?


    Carynne gritted her teeth. They hadnt even had a proper kiss yet, let aloney together on a bed of roses! Was it because she told him all those details about her repeating life that she had gottencent andzy around him? Pathetic.


    As expected, Mdy is beautiful.


    Fortunately, it didnt seem like she should be all that worried about it yet. Donnas eyes were still entirely covered with envy. Carynne agreed with what the maid said, too, as she looked over the light purple dress she had donned.


    The dress had few embellishments, but the fabric itself was so luxurious that there was no need to add anything more. The dress was neat and respectable with little skin exposure except for her arms. Even so, the price of this conservative little dress was more than ten times of the most expensive dresses that she had worn while she was still living at the Hare mansion.


    And todays small gathering was more for a group of children. Since she had gotten attention from her stint at gambling, this much was appropriate so that her image could be calmed down. Luxurious, yet unpretentiousthats the goal.


    Besides, todays schedule wasprised not only of the gathering, but also of Raymonds send-off. Today, she was a wistful youngdy whos about to see her fianc off as hell be risking his life on duty. Carynne knew that hed being back with greater honor than he already had before, but she had to be conscious of other peoples eyes on her. Even the maids eyes as well.


    I heard that Lord Raymond will be leaving soon. Are you going to see him off, Mdy?


    Just in time, Donna asked about Carynnes fianc. In response, Carynne nodded.


    Yes, well be leaving together today. Ill be going out, and hes been called to duty. Our schedules were made simr.


    Isnt that kind of amazing?


    Is it?


    Yeah, amazing. Its like someone pulled the strings to make this happen, right?


    But Carynne held her tongue and didnt say this aloud.


    Where will His Lordship be going? Its not to a dangerous ce, is it?


    I dont know either.


    Um Arent you curious, Mdy?


    Donna asked cautiously as she tied the strings behind Carynne. She answered in a s tone.


    Hes not going to tell me anyway.


    And if she were to be honest, she wasnt really curious. He was going toe back to Carynne, safe and sound. Shes sure of it. He used to show a bit of anxiety at the asional untimely calls before, but it all turned out to be nothing. He always came back, bringing greater honor. He always came back to Carynne.


    How have you been these days in this ce?


    Ive been quite alright, Donna replied.


    The maid had a faint smile on her lips. Indeed, as Carynnes maid, for her, there were only a few ces other than the countess residence thatsfortable to live in, and this was because the countess had provided the annex for Carynne. Donna was exclusively serving Carynne as her attendant, so she didnt encounter any of the countess maids.


    Somehow, Carynne ended up with Donna like this. Its never happened before.


    Her rtionship with Nancy usually ended after leaving the mansion, and even if there were handmaids to attend to herter, they were inherently servants who worked under other people. Carynne imagined striking Donnas round head with an axe. Considering all this, this iteration would once again be a tad more different.

 Chapter 88

    Chapter 88


    Hey, Donna. Do you remember my mother? What do you think shell say if she sees me now?


    Of course I remember the Madam. She was so beautiful. And Im sure that shell say that Mdy looks good. Right now, you look just like the Madam when I met her when I was a child.


    Do you know anything else? Carynne stared at Donna.


    What kind of person was she?


    I was young back then, so And I wasnt working at the mansion just yet.


    Ah.


    Donna was only one year older than Carynne.


    Feeling that it was a waste, Carynne clicked her tongue. No, she shouldnt raise her expectations. There were more people in high society who knew about her mother anyway.


    As she tried to recall the face of Crown Prince Gueuze, Carynne slipped on her shoes.


    But I do remember the Madam going to the vige often.


    Really?


    She was like an angel. She was very involved with helping the poor, and she was also interested in teaching.


    I did that, too, but it wasnt quite the answer I was looking for.


    Carynne reflected on her past. There was a time when she was under the false impression that good deeds would be the answer. She rebuilt her fathers estate from the ground up, basically robbing herself of her fortune to save those stricken by poverty.


    But in the end, that wasnt the answer either. While she was caring for the children in the slums in the past, she was murdered by a passing vagrant.


    What kind of hardships did Catherine undergo? Still, she thought that the world couldnt possibly have been as tough on Catherine as much as it had been to Carynne. If Catherine had helped the poor, it still wasnt the answer that could bring death, but purely just her hobby.


    Mother has always been sincere, I see.


    Yes. Actually, I applied to the mansion as a maid because I was so moved by how beautiful the Madam was. I was happy just seeing her sometimes. And she was so kind.


    I suppose.


    If you really were kind, why didnt you give me the answer? Why were you like that only to your own daughter, to Carynne? You had been kind to everyone else despite them being mere ink. The truth is still hidden from me, its all so dark and confusing. Why, Mother.


    Carynne closed her eyes.


    No, lets not think about it.


    My family and I were able to pay off most of our debts with the money that the Madam gave us. She really was beautiful inside and out.


    But its impossible for her to have been beautiful as she died. Carynne recalled what Missus Deere said. Catherine was beautiful, but when she died, she fell ill and died while looking unbearably ugly. Maybe shed die the same death. Maybe thats part of the curse, too.


    At least when I die, I wish I can still be pretty.


    Pardon?


    Mm, um Well, I do.


    With somewhat of a cynical smile, Carynneughed. She could no longer remember her face other than the one she had now. She only had a vague impression that she looked ordinary in the past. Somewhat like Donna. But she couldnt remember exactly. Her name, too. She had no other identity now other than  Carynne .


    Dont say that, Mdy.


    Did you see my mother during her final days?


    No, I didnt


    Donna replied dejectedly. Carynne felt its a shame that Donna was about the same age as her. If Missus Deere was the one next to her now, the woman would have been able to tell her more about her mother. She let herself be swept by her annoyance that time. Maybe she killed the woman too soon.


    Regardless, Im sure that my mother went to heaven. Thank you, Donna. For thinking kindly of my mother.


    If my mother had lived for one hundred years as well, Im sure she did everything there was that she could do. And yet, in the end, it was a sessshe died. How exactly did Mother die? What did she think about during her final moments? Did she go back to her own world? Not in this ce, but somewhere far, far away.


    Towards Carynne, who felt jealous by herself as she contemted, Donna gently urged.


    Youll live for a long, long time, Mdy.


    Thanks.


    With Sir Raymond, too.


    You think?


    Carynneughed sardonically. If thats how itll go, then she would have done it already before.


    Could she find the answer this time?


    Carynne waited. She heard footsteps approaching. Its time for Raymond toe. Then, she heard a knock on the door. She looked at her reflection once more, checking her dress before telling the maid to open the door.


    Yet again, its time to go out.


    Lets go, its time to leave.


    Its time to meet one of her mothers suitors from the past, this countrys crown prince Would he be able to give better answers?


    Carynne hoped that would be the case.


    Well, in any case, Im not going to expect too much. I dont want to set myself up for disappointment. Seeing as how my mother didnt end up with him, Im sure he wont give me the right answer. Ill just go with this mentality. Nothing has happened so far, so Im sure nothing will happen in the future.


    You think so?


    While they were on their way to the carriage, Raymond answered Carynne as she was chattering to herself. After seeing Carynne off, hed be out to kill people again.


    Shes saying that she wasnt going to look forward to it, but her eyes were nheless sparkling with excitement. She hoped that her anticipation wouldnt end up shattering in the end. Raymond thought that she was acting not so different from a child whod been handed a toy.


    Please go in.


    There was no foothold again this time, but Carynne didnt have to step on another person. Lifting Carynne to the carriage, Raymond repeated his word of warning.


    Once again, please dont get close to Crown Prince Gueuze. Always surround yourself with the noblewomen. Dont wander alone for no reason, its dangerous.


    Am I being sent out to war right now?


    Raymond repeated the same warning again and asked Carynne to promise shed do it. But when she heard it, she just tapped her shoes slightly as she red at Raymond from above.


    It didnt seem like he was treating her like a child. But still, Raymond continued speaking without even lifting an eyebrow. Compared to him, she really was acting like a child.


    And Ive left my will to mywyer. When its time to release my obituary, find him right away.


    Good grief, Sir Raymond. You absolutely wont die!


    That would be nice though, actually.


    However, Raymond just stopped talking and grinned at the young woman who was so certain that he wouldnt die. He hoped so, too. After all, he was the male lead who was born to love her. There should be nothing for him to fear because the future was already set in stone.


    Oh, but how nice would it be if life was that easy.


    Raymond felt dismayed by it. If what shes saying was true, why were there hardships in his life? Why were there hardships in <i>her</i> life? Hes absolutely not going to die, she said? But Raymond would never go out to war without leaving behind a will.


    Thus far, he had experienced countless brushes with death. If he had gone east instead of west. If he had drunk the water in that particr well. If he had not killed the prisoners.


    Raymond had to go through a myriad of choices to end up still being alive right now, and yet thats being considered as a mere essory to his characterization. If this was a novel made to revolve around her, why did these things have to happen? Why were people still dying on the streets? Why was war still being waged?


    The notion that this world was a novel was nothing but arrogance and deceit. It was a childish delusion for her to believe that this world was made for herself.


    Sir Raymond, youll be back in three days.


    Alright.


    Its the truth.


    Yes.


    Nevertheless, whenever he looked into her eyes, seeing the confidence she carried, whenever he gazed upon her expression, seeing how firmly she believed that he would not die, he found himself <i>wanting</i> to believe.


    He wanted to think that there would be no sad things in the world, that he would be able to do everything for her. Even if its all crazy nonsense.


    You cant.


    Yes?


    I know you want to pat my head, but it took six hours just to style my hair, so you cant.


    Yes.


    Raymond lowered his hand awkwardly. Carynneughed. She reached forward to hold his cor as she leaned down.


    Ill pat you instead.


    Yes.


    It wasnt as long as six hours, but he also worried about his own hair for one hour. Carynne didnt seem to know that not just women put that much effort into their own hair, but also men. Still, she was under the illusion that she had lived for one hundred years, so perhaps as the older one between them, he generously allowed himself to be patted by her.


    Carynne stroked Raymonds hair and smiled proudly. She seemed to like the hair that he styled himself.


    Even so, be careful on your way.


    He wanted to believe.


    He wanted to believe her delusion.


    However, it was impossible to believe.


    Saying nothing in return, Raymond kissed the back of Carynnes hand.

 Chapter 89

    Chapter 89


    * * *


    The night Carynne had copsed in the Evans familys mansion


    Dun, who was dragged to this room by Raymond, spoke incredulously.


    D-Do you believe that?


    Would there be anything else that I cant believe?


    Raymond shrugged and looked down at Dun. After he checked the sleeping Carynnes condition once more time, Dun stood up from his seat.


    When he did, Raymond realized that the priest was taller than he thought. He tended to hunch over so he usually looked shorter, but he was quite tall now as he stood straight and looked back into Raymonds eyes. If the priest had been his subordinate, he would have bent his back over to straighten it.


    Raymond bowed once to Dun, holding back the urge to meddle and try to convince the other man.


    Do pardon me for my actions, Reverend. Please understand that I couldnt hold back my anxiety. I just wanted to save a person immediately.


    I un, derstand.


    Sure, but just before this, Raymond had dragged Dun by the cor and quite literally shoved him straight to Carynnes sickbed.


    And contrary to the priests heartless promation that theres nothing to be done if shes already dead, Dun nevertheless checked Carynnes condition and gave her new medicine. She started breathing more easily after that. In response, Raymond also breathed out a sigh of relief.


    Reverend, it wont take long now. And I wish to respect her. I hope youll do the same.


    Even while handcuffed, hed treat her with courtesy. Raymond didnt say anything more after this.


    Carynne could havemitted murder before. Perhaps Dun was her aplice, or perhaps he himself was the murderer.


    Raymond recalled how Duns attendant had been the first to cry out about the manors fire. And in the end, the cause of the fire had never been properly uncovered. The investigators concluded that the likeliest possibility is that it originated in the kitchen, but the fire had spread too fast to say for sure.


    He wasnt so sure about lumping together the two of them anymore. Thats how Raymond thought before, but then Duns seemingly petty behavior now was weakening this theory of his. The priest was acting as if he loathed Carynne, who had broken off their engagement, thereby disgracing him. Even now, he was disgraced once again when Raymond dragged him here.


    Sir Raymond. Youre a good man.


    However, there was just too much emotion on his face as he reacted


    * * *


    Sir Raymond, I thought youd finally be able to kick back and rx now, though I guess thats not it. I was under the impression that youd be enjoying your life with your famous fiance right about now, sir. Guess youre also destined to grow old and die as an old bachelor.


    Sir Zion. Do be quiet.


    Wow, even the way you talk is cool? Do you speak that calmly around women, too?


    Shut it.


    Gotcha.


    Zion grinned in his attempt to cheer up Raymond, with a tone albeit mixed with sarcasm.


    How long until we get there? Raymond asked.


    Itll take us six hours, sir. In the meantime, Ill exin the infiltration detail then, so if you want to rest, nows the time.


    How long can I rest?


    Ten minutes maybe? Just kidding. We dont have time. Were starting.


    Zion rummaged through the shelf and took some things out.


    For a moment, Raymond closed his eyes. When he did, there was only darkness and silence. And, three seconds was enough. His apprehension sank down. His thoughts were wiped out. A soldier does not think. He will not form opinions. Right now, he had only one objective in mind. To aplish his mission. Raymond opened his eyes.


    The blueprints?


    Right here. Our route has been marked with a red line.


    Raymond frowned as he received the blueprints. There was something odd about the route.


    This is the Dukes residence were talking about here, so Im sure theres still a lot ofmoners in there. Do you have an estimate of how many? And the mercenaries, how many are there?


    We dont have that intel.


    Do you at least know how many of the Dukes soldiers are left?


    We dont have that intel either.


    Raymond stared pointedly at Zions expression, but it didnt seem like he was joking about this. Uncharacteristically, he looked stiff. This was the reason why he was so testy from the beginning.


    Looking down at the blueprints again, Raymond asked.


    Are you certain that the Duke is inside?


    Yes, sir.


    Zion himself knew how impossible it was to fulfill this order. And he also knew how strange it was to assign this operation to someone like Raymond, who was about to be a member of the Assembly.


    Still, the two men didnt talk about it. What difference would it make to question it? Soldiers had no opinion. If ordered to die, they will die.


    Alright. Then if were going through the waterways, how will we navigate? We also need a cross-section and a detailed map of the location.


    The waterways?


    Zion asked as he worked through Raymonds rapid-fire words. In response to the question, Raymond nodded.


    Its impossible to infiltrate in this condition. We dont know how many people there are. Or if we should kill all of them while going in. But then, theres a limit to the bullets that I can carry alone. And as much as possible, Id like to reduce the number of people Ide across while Im on my way to the Dukes quarters. So, what about the waterways?


    Raymond wondered how different this job was going to be. Before this, he had been given the role of an ordinary knight, then a sniper, and now he was tasked to infiltrate and assassinate someone. It hasnt even been more than a few years since he received his role as a sniper and got used to it.


    With a fleeting thought, Raymond supposed that its a good thing that he came alone after leaving Xenon tied to the stables. Rather than be of help to him, Xenon would just have been a burden if he came along. The fewer people working this operation, the better.


    Yes. Going that way would require you to hold your breath for about ten minutes. Even so, its been raining in the area for a while now, so the risk of being caught there will be low. Please wait a moment, Ill redraw the route. And Sir Raymond, please take this.


    Zion handed Raymond a new gun. The weight of itid pressure upon his hand.


    It seems like His Majesty wishes to test out a new weapon.


    Clearly, Carynne knew very little. And her assertions were all evidently just nave delusions.


    Raymond tried to repress his thoughts as they came to mind.


    * * *


    So youre Sir Raymond Saytes fiance. Thank you foring all the way here. Its delightful to meet you.


    It is also a great honor for me to meet you, Prince Lewis.


    Carynne slightly lifted the hem of her dress and bowed down. Then, when Prince Lewis motioned for her to be at ease, she straightened up again.


    As she saw his face, it was as Lady Lianne said.


    Handsome, huh.


    His hair was light brown, while his eyes were dark brown. Although he was still young, his features were distinct. Its obvious that hed grow up into a considerably handsome man, for as long as God wouldnt y a few tricks while hed go through puberty.


    All of the young nobledies of the princes age were focused on Carynne and Lewis. They were all showing such favorability towards him already. Its quite likely that the prince will make many women cry in the future, just like his father.


    I didnt expect to meet Your Highness so soon. It is a great honor for me.


    Since I was called, I thought Id meet your dad instead.


    Carynne thought this as she watched the boy take a nce at her chest. He certainly looked attractive to his peers, but since he was too young for her, he was of no interest.


    At best, the kind of interest she had in him was limited to picturing what might possibly happen if this boys head were to suddenly be lopped off. This kind of imagination had already be Carynnes habit. But Carynne found that this turn of events might just be pretty fun, so it was difficult to shake off the temptation.


    Even if Id just had a hand in the deaths of one maid, one rapistoh, its so exciting. How interesting would the world be if the crown princes firstborn son were to die! If only I didnt make any promises and could choose another option here! I think this loop has been lost already anyway. If I kill this kid, Id definitely get the death penalty. If only I can be sure that theyd kill me immediately without torturing me, Id strangle this kids neck right here, right now.


    No, no. In the end, this is nothing but a passing delusion. Lets focus on reality.


    Oh.


    Prince Lewis tilted his head to the side, a questioning look in his eyes as he nced up at Carynne.


    Yes?


    Sir Raymond didnte with you?


    As she had been in the middle of imagining cruel things to do to the boy, Carynne snapped out of it when Prince Lewis talked to her, and she replied a bit btedly. Why was he asking though?


    I apologize, Your Highness, but Sir Raymond has work today.


    Really? Thats too bad. What kind of work is it? Is it more important than a summons from the Royal Family?


    This princes precociousness seemed to include exercising his power appropriately. But then Carynne wondered why the prince said this in the first ceits clear that hes disappointed that Raymond didnte. Then why didnt the invitation include him, too?


    Did you want to meet Sir Raymond?


    Yes, I do want to meet him. I dont know if my father will give me permission though. What a shame.


    But only <i>my</i> name was on the invitation. And its <i>your</i> fatheror perhaps your grandfatherwho sent Raymond to a ce where hes forced to wield his gun again. Not here, in this gathering of young nobles.


    Carynne lowered her gaze. It seemed like Raymonds hunch was right.


    Ah, still though, Im not all too disappointed since youre here. Im so d that Im able to see your beauty with my own eyes. I even want to ask you to dance right away.


    Oh my.


    Carynne immediately felt the gazes around her sharpen.


    Oh, spare me. Hes ten years old. Ladies,dies, cant you see that the prince is just saying this out of courtesy?


    She smiled bitterly. And as though he noticed the change in atmosphere, the young princeughed.


    Is it too soon for me to say that?


    Your Highness is still young. Ill be much, much older once you make your debut.


    Twenty-four isnt that old.


    Thats already very old for a woman. And Your Highness, it isn''t good to have your first dance with a woman whos already betrothed. Wouldnt it be better for you to look forward to Miss Carynnes daughter instead of Miss Carynne herself?


    Countess Elva stepped into the conversation.

 Chapter 90

    Chapter 90


    The countess eyes as she looked at Carynne were cold. Good grief, Madam. Look at how swiftly your attitude changes. Faced with the countess fast change in attitude, Carynne could onlyugh. Carynne wasnt being any help to the countess daughter, so look at how immediately Countess Elvas changing how shes regarding the younger woman.


    This ce was as cold as the war Raymond was facing. Besides that, theres nothing to gain here. Even so, the one whos saving her now was the wrong person.


    Prince Lewis, are you going back on your promise to have your first dance with me?


    No, thats not it.


    Lady Lianne looked as if she was just about ready to burst into tears. At a loss, Lewis eyes trembled as he watched Lianne sob.


    Right then, another nobleman stepped in.


    Your Highness Lewis.


    Ah, Baron Treill. Its been a while. Lady Soleia, youve also grown a lot taller in the time that we didnt see each other.


    Baron Treill didnt seem all too pleased that thepliment his daughter received was about her height.


    But wait a minute, Your Highness. Didnt you say that youll be having your first dance with my dear Soleia? That was certainly what Your Highness said when you were five.


    When I was five


    That was only five years ago, Your Highness!


    Yes, but I was <i>five</i>


    By any chance, Your Highness Youre not saying that you dont remember because you were young, are you?


    Um


    He was, at most, ten years old right now. Even if hes the crown princes eldest son.


    Carynne felt sorry for Prince Lewis, who was sweating profusely amidst the nobles. But that didnt mean Carynne would involve herself in this.


    What am I supposed to do between those people? Congrattions, Your Royal Highness. Im quite sure you have lots of women hanging onto you for the rest of your life.


    Ah, Carynne.


    Dont talk to me.


    But then Prince Lewis continued on, promptly ignoring Carynnes silent plea.


    How did you meet Sir Raymond?


    Ah Um Instead of me, Your Highness, I believe theres many other more important people whod like to talk to you.


    Theres a countess over here and a marquis over there. Regardless however, Prince Lewis desperately turned his head and doggedly talked Carynne.


    Ahaha, but you know, these days, theres only a few things more interesting than your love story with Sir Raymond. All the youngdies are also curious about the story. Isnt that right?


    So, Prince Lewis urged the girls to agree with him, and this includes Lady Lianne and Lady Soleia. The girls pouted at first, as though they were protesting, but they soon agreed.


    Yes Im curious.


    Me, too


    After making eye contact with each other, the two girls ignored their parents as they scrambled to ask Carynne, their voices ovepping together.


    How did you meet


    And how did you fall in love


    Where did you have your first kiss


    I-Its too soon for that, Miss Soleia!


    Carynne turned to Prince Lewis and looked at him in protest, however the young prince just nodded back at her calmly. Soon, all the other youngdies around joined in, saying, me too, Im curious too.


    Sure, her story was fairly interesting. Its a good story to serve as fuel for gossip.


    A handsome man and a beautiful woman.


    These men and women who were of age, namely the childrens parents, were looking at Carynne as though she was a rival. However, the girls just saw Carynne as a far older woman. She didnt feel negatively about this, but shes just a bit tired of it.


    Please tell us!


    Im curious as well.


    She couldnt refuse here anymore. Carynne had no choice but to smile and open her lips to speak. Alright, lets tell a story. A story of love. A romantic story that children would love to hear. Something close to what she heard back in the day.


    The first time we met, I was


    Now that she thought about it though, how far exactly should she divulge? Should she say, While I was almost about to get raped, I got stabbed in the side by a dagger. Like that?


    Carynne mulled over it. Should she also tell them that she saw an elephant?


    I didnt listen to my father But when I snuck out, I got a bit lost.


    Oh my goodness! You know that a woman shouldnt walk around alone, Carynne!


    Thank you for the advice, Lady Lianne.


    Maybe she should just say that she got lost like this and they met like that. Carynne nearly broke out in cold sweat as she agonized over how far she was supposed to tell these youngdies, whose eyes were twinkling as they waited eagerly.


    * * *


    Raymond slit a servants throat. The mans eyes turned over as he keeled over while clutching his neck.


    Hhk, uh, hh.


    Whether he was trying to talk or run away, the man moved. He struggled, but this soon became meaningless. Raymond grabbed the man by the neck and bent it back. And, that was it.


    H-Huh?


    Another maid. Raymond went over to the woman whose mouth was gaping. Then, he twisted her neck. That was it.


    <i>Thud.</i>


    You scoundrel!


    This time, it was a muscr man. A mercenary. In his hand was a rifle. However, the man found Raymond not in an ambush, but a chance encounter. Raymond was near the door, and so, the gun was useless. The distance was too close.


    Tch


    It was the wrong move to have brought a gun. The muscr man reached into his pocket to try and take out a dagger, but it was already toote.


    Looking for this?


    Raymond shed the mans neck and chest at the same instant. In his other hand was the dagger that the man had been looking for. Raymond was a sniper, but this, too, was just another job. He had never failed to kill anyone. There was no hesitation in his movements, his vision, his breathing. Everything.


    Zion, that stupid punk.


    Raymond swept up his soaked hair. This was supposedly a ce thats not frequented by a lot of people, but he had alreadye across three people in same time that he would have brewed a cup of tea. What an exceptionally unhelpful subordinate, that guy.


    After killing three people in quick session, Raymond looked down at his weapon. He didnt have much to go on for his report on it. He should start using it if its for the sake of testing. But really, Raymond was doubtful of how useful it was going to be.


    Did they really mean for me to assassinate Duke Luthe alone?


    If thats the order, then its nothing short of sending him to die. No matter how effective and outstanding the silencer of this new gun was, and no matter how efficient it was at killingthe number of bullets Raymond could bring with him was limited, and its impossible for one person to deal with a hundred people at the same time. If he was a mage from the olden times, then who knows, but that wasnt the case here.


    You wont die. Absolutely not.


    Indeed, it was an easy statement to make. Raymond shook his head. This wasnt the time for him to indulge in idle thoughts. Go to the dukes quarters now. Dont think of anything else.


    * * *


    Duke Luthe. Have you prepared a will?


    Duke Lute felt the cold metal against his temple. And, he realized who the owner of that voice was.


    I didnt expect you toe alone.


    Im not alone.


    Raymond refuted it, but it seemed like Luthe could see right through him. The duke was about to open his mouth again, but Raymond pushed the dukes head harshly with his other hand.


    There are a lot of people in this ce. Do you think youll survive?


    Your consideration is too kind, Duke.


    This talk was going on for too long. Raymond hit the back of one of the dukes knees. At this, the old dukes body copsed straight down. This great nobleman was kneeling on the ground. <i>Clench.</i> His teeth gritted together audibly.


    Duke Luthes first instinct was to get angry here, but instead, he justughed in vain as he thought of his fate in the very near future.


    My friends, my son, my men. They all died at your hands.


    In the end, I know that I, too, will die in your hands.


    Anyst words?


    Do I have time to leave a will?


    Duke Luthe asked back calmly, and Raymond hesitated for a moment to gauge the situation. Whether he killed the duke now orter, it was of little consequence. But he had to calcte the right time for when Zion would be leading the subordinates in.


    Duke, if youre trying to stall, then Im afraid you dont have any hope left. Theres no one else but us whos alive on the sixth and seventh floor.


    Because I killed them all.


    Raymond didnt say thest part anymore.


    At that, Duke Luthe stared briefly into the empty air, then he hung his head. Raymond answered the dukes question nheless.


    Still, if you want to leave a will, it wont be of much use. Im simply asking if you have any final words. I cant possibly sign as a witness for your will.


    At Raymond''s cold words, Duke Luthe looked up at the younger man, lifting his gaze but not his head. He opened his lips to speak.


    What rank do you have now?


    A captain, sir.


    Not even a field-grade officer. What does my life amount to.


    Duke Luthe smiled bitterly. He thought that Raymond would have at least been a colonel. Surely enough, this country had given him a much higher rank. This young man could measure up to that much ability and poprity after all.


    But Raymond just shrugged in response.


    Is rank important when faced with a bullet?


    What would you say if I offered you the rank of a general?


    <em>t/n: just a lil mass release to celebrate the manhwaunch  hope you guys enjoyed~</em>

 Chapter 83: Story of love

    Chapter 83: Story of love


    Its quite niceing out during the day like this, and its all thanks to you, Sir Raymond. I thought this iteration of mine would be spent just working until I die.


    Im happy to have helped. It is a mans honor to alleviate adys hardships.


    What an exemry answer.


    He had promised to be honest. When Carynne chastised Raymonds mechanical answer, he stopped writing and raised his head to look at Carynne. So, Raymond spoke again to her with a slightly dissatisfied expression.


    To be honest, Im not really happy. I believe that people dont anymore do useless things when theyre busy. Thats why youll be able to have a healthier lifestyle as long as you know the joys of diligent work and the preciousness of everyday life.


    Raymonds nagging went on and on. Carynne said that shed give Raymond Baron Eins money if he wanted it, but he promised not to touch it. Thats why he shouldnt care how exactly shed be spending it, but it seemed like he still expressed his dislike whenever shed spend it wrongly.


    Carynne waved her hand to stop the prolonged nagging.


    Stop it. Youre worse than Dun. Are you telling me off for being extravagant? I <i>did</i> offer to give you the money if you wanted it.


    I would have understood if you spent luxuriously on dresses and jewelry, but really. The things youve purchased, um. Honestly, I cant understand at all.


    Raymond had organized the list of the things that Carynne bought. She could tell that he was sighing at the sheer length of the seemingly endless list.


    Pointing one finger at him, Carynne stated the obvious.


    Youre looking down on the history of those items. Theyre antiques, you know.


    Im still not sure about these things. Theyre worth nothing, while antiques are worth at least <i>something.</i> You wont be able to resell any of this.


    Its apparent that Carynne had developed a vice in buying anything and everything that had a connection with her predecessors. No matter what the price was, she didnt hesitate to buy them.


    Naturally, money flowed out like a faulty leak in the pipes. Raymond was criticizing that in particr.


    Did you perhaps acquire some traits from Mister Verdic? Ah, I dont mean to reproach you. Like I said before, arent my circumstances quite special? Thats why Im buying everything that has any relevance.


    I see. The attorney will being to the mansionter this afternoon, and they said theyd like to pay half first and the rest in installments. Baron Eins mansion has been auctioned off. Hes nowpletely bankrupt. Im just hoping he wont hang his neck on a noose after this.


    The schedule was tight. Carynne counted on her fingers as she deliberated the remaining days. Shes thinking that perhaps shed die first before being able to spend all of Baron Eins money.


    Tell him he can take his time in paying. Itll take me more than a year to spend it all, but I wont have the luxury of time until then.


    That would be a greatfort to him. Though he might nevertheless hold a grudge.


    Raymonds countenance was not very bright. Carynne nced down to observe his face. This was also the first time that Carynne had won this much money. She earned proportionally as much as Raymonds investment.


    Oh my, but I did that under your order, Sir Raymond. Do you regret it?


    No, its just I didnt expect you to win that much.


    Carynne had stayed up for two nights, wondering about how she should make Raymond fall for her. He was treating her coldly, with sharp eyes and a sharp tongue. The only thing she achieved with winning arge sum of money through gambling was heightened caution on his part, hardly making him fall in love with her.


    I guess, rather than acting like a psychopath, I should have gone down the path of being more pitiful.


    Sitting at the top of thedder, Carynne let out a sigh. After earning that much money from gambling, she decided to use it on trying to trace her predecessors.


    If my mother was like me, what about my grandmother, and my great-grandmother as well?


    It wasnt easy to trust what Dun had said with the situation here while she was with Raymond. And she didnt know how to make Raymond fall in love with her.


    If she knew that its all going toe to this point, she would have been nice from the beginning.


    Then again, if she didnt murder those people, she wouldnt havee to know the answer she knew now.


    That look in his eyes, I dont like it.


    She wanted to nab those eyeballs from their sockets. This was her thought as she stared back at the grimacing Raymonds eyes.


    Raymond had always given her gentle smiles. It was quite ufortable and awkward that he was looking at her with suspicion now.


    Raymonds greatest merit was his unchanging consistency. Though it was a new feeling, all she felt now was how inconvenient his attitude towards her was, rather than feeling refreshed.


    I just want to kill myself already and start the next life.


    But the problem was that suicide was impossible at this time. Its only in thest chapter of the novel that shed be allowed to die. Before that time, she had to live somehow. Then, theres also the problem of how shed be able to get more answers from Dun. A problem here, a problem there.


    From up on thedder, Carynne looked down at the crown of Raymonds head, then she let out a deep sigh.


    You decided to believe, right?


    Yes.


    Raymond and Carynne left Verdics mansion and were now staying at Countess Elvas residence. And though they were under her roof, they were independent to some extent because they were staying at the mansions annex.


    The countess smiled wryly while saying, A young couple should live separately of course, however until this point of time, any contact between them was a far cry from anything sexual.


    In any case, please say that you love me in front of Dunter. I guess there are still some unresolved feelings.


    Yes.


    You promised to believe.


    Yes.


    Please fix your expression.


    I understand.


    Raymond answered as his grip on the pen tightened. His facial muscles twitched. Even though he decided to believe, he somehow still wanted to express his own opinion that Carynnes words were quite absurd.


    So then Mm Right You repeat the same life, and love Um Love might solve it, yes. But then, throughout all that time, its possible that I had treated you insincerely. Thats why Um I will have to love you and confess in front of Reverend Dun.


    Raymond forced himself to say all that. Again, his expression was twitching.


    You know, I think hell cry once he hears your confession.


    I will try.


    Whatever kind of expression he had on his face, she was making the best out of this. Even with the smallest of things. She slept as much as she wanted, and in her spare time, she researched what she could. And there was also someone here who could help her. Raymondhes the one helping her. Though she couldnt be sure of his thoughts.


    Raymonds eyes were different from how they used to be. For now, she had to doubt whether he truly did love her in the past. But even so, its certain that his gaze, as he looked at her, definitely used to be softer. And back then, he couldnt take his eyes off her. Perhaps it could be said that they were the eyes of an adorable puppy.


    Inside a novel You repeat your life, and Yes I believe it.


    Staring at Raymonds countenance, Carynne sighed. She was sure that he <i>was </i>like that in the past. Moderately buoyant, moderatelyforting. Thinking about it all, Carynne was met with the urge to throw a book right into his face.


    Please endure it.


    Endure what?


    The book just now. You were going to throw it at my face.


    So you know. Here.


    As Raymond was under thedder, Carynne tossed the heavy book at him, and his hand caught it readily. The old smell of the parchment reached his nose, and its unfamiliarity made him frown.


    The title of the book was written in a foreignnguage, but it didnt look like an unfamiliar script. While staring at the title, Raymondmented.


    Its a history book.


    Rather than history, its more like just a record of idle chitchat here and there.


    Carynne answered Raymond as she looked over the vast mountain of books.


    The fifth floor of the grand royal library. Carynne had nevere this far before. When she went to the grand library before, she did read some books, but the fifth floor could be entered only with special permission. She didnt expect Raymond to be this helpful. Hes like a ticket in.


    Carynne held tight on thedder and looked down at Raymonds head. That head looked good as a target. His hair was shiny, and his head was round.


    Then why dont you start with coting information first?


    Raymond was the one who suggested that theye to a library. It was a different reaction from what she had experienced before.


    In the past when Carynne had confessed to Raymondwho was her lover at that pointthat she had been living the same life repeatedly, he hadforted her dearly as she trembled in anxiety.


    However, the Raymond of the present, who was bound by duty and contract, just tilted his head to the side and gave her a different answer.


    I think it would be better to go to a library first.


    A library? Well, Ive been to libraries a few times before.


    Lets look into more information there. As you said, it would be better to focus on investigating your predecessors. If we cant find anything, then itll at least be entertaining.


    However, there was one thing that Carynne and Raymond hadnt thought of.


    Women dont leave many records.


    At least, Im d they hadnt beenmoners.


    And so, Raymond and Carynne spent an entire week at the library with nothing much to show for. Records usually followed patriarchs, not matriarchs. Of all things, why did she have to be born as a woman? Carynne wanted to cry.

 Chapter 84

    Chapter 84


    Look at that, buying portraits turned out to be more helpful. And its more fun to look at pretty faces.


    While ignoring Raymonds silent protest at the expenditure, the portraits that Carynne bought were good to have in terms of finding out more about her ancestry.


    Raymond nodded as well. Small wars had been waged too frequently throughout the continent, so records inevitably disappeared from time to time.


    Carynne managed to enter the grand library with Raymonds help, but there were too few records that were worth looking at. After the women had gone abroad or after getting married, all records of them disappeared, and if they had married amoner, their name would bepletely erased. The most useful record they found was of Grand Duchess Ca, who was Carynnes great-great-grandmother on her mothers side.


    My mother, my mothers mother, and everyone before. Theyre all pretty, arent they?


    Carynnes mother, grandmother, great-grandmother and great-great-grandmother. They were all redheaded women who had beauty enough to make peoples heads turn. And its easy to find portraits of such beautiful womena lot of artists had left many portraits of them behind. But, in the end, thats all.


    Still though, Im the prettiest.


    Thats a lot of confidence you have there. Anyway, thats enough. Lets go.


    Raymond replied sourly. He shoved the list aside and piled up all the books that Carynne had handed him. She was going to borrow these books because she couldnt read them all here.


    Her eyes caught sight of his face in her periphery, and so she expressed her admiration.


    Sir Raymond, youre handsome, too.


    Thank you.


    A beautiful young man and woman are meant to share love between them, dont you think?


    Ignoring Carynnes words, Raymond remained silent and walked far ahead.


    What a long way to go ahead of her. Carynne sighed deeply as she followed after him.


    * * *


    With trembling hands, Baron Ein lit his pipe. His wife took their child and left for her parents house, leaving a letter behind that said the divorce papers would be mailed to him at ater date. And there was not a single maid left to cling to him and moan under him.


    Ein vented his anger at the men who took even the most insignificant of his possessions.


    Shit, why are you taking even the portraits!


    Youre required to sell everything thats even the least bit valuable, Baron Ein.


    The attorney bowed his head and answered politely. Even so, there was a smirk on his lips as he kept his head down.


    This situation was so fun to watch. Baron Ein had be theughingstock of high society. Even though he lost his fortune in one fell swoop, no one was sympathizing with him. His fall to ruin left him with no honor and no importance.


    Ein knew well enough just how ludicrous his situation looked to others, but he could only huff on his pipe.


    Is death the answer.


    It was baffling no matter how he thought of it. Carynne had not hesitated for even a momentshe didnt even look at the cards. He thought that she might have been cheating while waiting for a signal from someone else, but that wasnt even the case.


    Fuck.


    Should he kill himself to preserve his honor? With his pipe between his lips, Ein had no choice but to watch it all unfold, dumbfounded. As he watched all these people dragging out all the belongings that could be soldeven his houndsemptyughter burst through his throat.


    Actually, this isnt the first time.


    His grandfather had once yed this kind of card game. Ein remembered the story of how the Baron Ein of two generations ago had been so utterly defeated by Grand Duchess Ca with three cards. Catherine had also once yed a card game with him back in the day. Ever since she had met eyes with Hare, she never looked back at Ein anymore.


    Ein gnashed his mrs. Fucking wenches.


    Ah, shit.


    Ein leaned his head against the door frame and spat out curses. They even took his desk. Later, Ein had to write a letter against a wall in that empty room. While writing, he mumbled to himself about how he wanted everyone dead.


    * * *


    I love you. I <i>love</i> you. Truly, I do.


    However, that confession was empty. It did not reach the other person. His feelings were worth nothing to her. That woman, whose eyes were shining as she looked at him not too long ago, had such a disgusted look in her eyes as she faced him. There was no reason for her to have changed like that.


    She wouldnt open the door even if he would knock.


    She wouldnt reply even if he sent letters.


    Anger turned into tears, and after that, only emptiness was left.


    The fires of passion died down, the embers of anger became insignificant.


    Only filthy hatred remained.


    Still, Crown Prince Gueuze could remember his own passion.


    * * *


    Thank you.


    Raymond held out a flower to Carynne. The light blue hydrangeas looked charming. Carynne stared at the hydrangeas, the petals of which still holding dew. Recently, shes been hearing his confession almost every day.


    Raymond asked cautiously.


    Do you feel anything different?


    The exchange of love and thanks was like a joke and a punchline, but neither of the two people involved found humor in this. Raymond confessed to her as promised. And yet, nothing changed. Was it meaningless if its tied to obligation?


    Doesnt seem like it. Who did you buy this from?


    The flowers were beautiful, but they didnt look very valuable. The light blue-violet hydrangeas were suitable only for a days decoration. Carynne liked red roses the most, but still, these flowers had their own elegant charm.


    Still, dew wasnt good for books. Carynne pointed to the old books and research materials surrounding her, then handed the flowers back to Raymond. There wasnt a maid next to her to receive the gift for her, so the situation was quite funny, though it couldnt be helped.


    Realizing that he made a blunder, Raymondughed awkwardly.


    I bought these from an old neighborhood across the cathedral, from a girl named Cecil. The flowers were blooming, and they looked high quality.


    You went there early this morning?


    Sure, its possible to go to the capitals cathedral, but it wasn''t necessarily worth going that far when its not a church day. However, Raymond was the type of person whod catch a cold if he didnt actively move his body. Hes been like this even before he got engaged to Carynne, so he went to this ce and that at every opportunity he found.


    He did his best to be thoughtful as he often brought back gifts for her, but since he didnt know what exactly Carynne needed, he rather brought back flowers every day, which the maids would receive instead.


    Moderate exercise helps you enjoy a healthy life.


    She already knew whats going toe next. Hed ask her to go out together with him, but then Carynne was toozy to move at all.


    Thank you for the moderate advice. But I dont want to hear more.


    Sighing, Raymond took the bouquet that Carynne had handed back. He opened the window and ced the flowers by the windowsill. By then, Carynne became aware of how she hadnt slept in bed and instead sat up all night.


    Anyway, good morning, Carynne. Did you find anything throughout the night?


    Nothing right now. And I dont have much time Please cancel all of my uing appointments.


    When she saw that he was about to hand over some invitations, she shook her head. So many invitations came in, yet there wasnt enough time.


    Everyone wanted to meet Catherines daughter, who was also Evans adopted daughter, and at the same time Raymonds fiancewho made Baron Ein miserable. Compared to when she had to bend to Verdics whims, its different now. Even if Raymond went alone to those social gatherings, his presence alone was enough.


    Lets get up and eat first, shall we? And also wash your face. Its not proper for ady to constantly worry her loyal maid.


    While Carynne was buried in the middle of a mountain of books, Raymond picked her up and pulled her out from the pile. Then, he dusted her off. It looked like he was taking care of a naughty kid who had yed too much, and this made Carynne feel a bit displeased.


    Sir Raymond.


    Yes.


    What is love?


    Its giving the other person the best things that you can provide without feeling that its a waste. Its enough just to see the other person smiling.


    You dont actually believe me, do you?


    Raymond looked up at Raymonds vivid green eyes, which looked a bit taken aback.


    He didnt reply right away and instead continued to tidy up Carynnes clothes. Then, he handed over the bundle of letters that he brought.


    Im trying.


    Ah, so in the end, he really didnt believe her. In response, Carynne gave him a sullen look. Even if she thought about it, it didnt seem believable to her either.


    Its the truth, you knowwhat I said about how we unexpectedly became lovers in our past lives, how this world is inside a novel, how I relive this same life over and over


    And, how she was a murderer.


    Carynne held her tongue on thatst part. That one was taboo. A different kind of absurd taboo. No matter how much suspicion was being held against her, she shouldnt say it out loud. It was a promise and a courtesy. The final line of defense.


    Sweeping her hair to the side, Carynne changed her words. The days were blurring past. She needed to do what she could.

 Chapter 85

    Chapter 85


    What Raymond handed to her were invitations.


    Lets not go out today. Id like to look into a few more things instead.


    Carynne checked the envelopes. They were all from either nobles or from lowlife men who were crazy about gambling. Carynne set aside the bundle of letters and picked up a history book again. She disliked inane conversation.


    Its convenient to have a fianc at a time like this. Lets just write back with the excuse that youre jealous, Sir Raymond, thats why Im not going. Can we do that?


    Do as you please. Carynne, Im going to try trusting you.


    Is that a promise?


    Yes, its a promise. If your mother, Catherine, had the same symptoms as you, then it seems natural to infer that your maternal grandmother might have experienced the same thing.


    Will you try to love me, too?


    Raymond was rendered speechless for a moment.


    Youre not going to do it?


    Um, Carynne.


    It looked like Raymond was a little flustered. Then, as though he didnt know what to answer, he hesitated and stroked his chin. Even though not a single millimeter of a stubble could be found on his skin, this action made him look like a schr stroking his beard as he was lost in deep thought.


    On second thought, what <i>is</i> love? What is love for you? What is love for Reverend Dun?


    Im curious about that as well.


    In fact, maybe its a curse or something else. And honestly, I want to deny your way of thinkingthat this entire world is a novel.


    Whats wrong with thinking like that?


    Carynnes father had been in awe when he heard that this was a romance novel. Thats what Lord Hare thought.


    Right now, Carynne felt a tad nervous. She wondered about the difference between them even here. The only thing that Lord Hare and Raymond had inmon was how they had decent faces.


    Raymond hesitated for a second, then he replied.


    Its a bit immature.


    Do you want me to hit you? That immature thought is ruining my <i>life</i>.


    When Carynnes expression crumpled as she thought this, Raymond wrapped an arm around her shoulders to soothe her.


    Its not that Im condemning you or anything. But its just that, yeah. I think we have the same line of logic. Its so absurd that I <i>dont</i> want to believe it. This world is so absurd that war has broken out. And the fact that you keep dying over and over againif the only reason this is happening is due to love between a man and a woman, then all I could think is how terrible of a story it is.


    I suppose.


    Yes.


    Hearing this was not new to Carynne. She knew because, many times before, he expressed his anger against the injustices of the world.


    Some people may romanticize the notion that a persons life and death could be influenced greatly by a temporary emotion and by lust, but if the period in which these emotions could influence a persons fate turns into an endless eternity, then itd be nothing but terrible.


    So, Carynne just continued to ask a simple question. Philosophizing was so tiresome.


    Then, do you love me?


    Im trying every day.


    So you dont?


    That Dont set it in stone like that. Its just Im trying every day, but I dont know the criteria here, and I dont know until what point I should go. You dont know either.


    Carynne flopped down on a sofa. Fine, okay. Lets fall in love! But despite doing that and agreeing on it with a contract, how would they know? What was Duns criteria? And how long should this love be maintained?


    She gritted her teeth.


    May I sit next to you?


    Sure.


    Raymond sat on the sofa as well. The room fell into a bout of silence, and the two soon felt awkward.


    Hypothetically speaking, if what youre saying is true, to be honest I dont believe that love ys a big part here.


    Why?


    As I saidst time, only the face is important for me.


    Yes Thats the case.


    Looking once at Carynnes face, Raymond covered his own eyes with a hand and let out a sigh.


    I dont believe that my lovemy feelingsare worth so much.


    Why do you think so?


    If thats truly how it is, then the world is much too bleak.


    Is that so?


    But that really is the case with you.


    Carynne recalled the past when she had sympathized with Raymond. He went to war, and there, he continued to kill people.


    Yes. Thats why if that truly is the case, thats what I think. If its because of my love that you keep dying again and again, then I will love you. Emotions cannot take precedence over death.


    Thank you for trying.


    Im telling the truth. And, um, yes. Its true that I thought youre beautiful from the moment Iid my eyes on you. In all my life, Ive never seen anyone as beautiful as you. When I saw you smiling, it felt as if your surroundings started to shine as well.


    Raymonds words wereforting. <i>If you want love, then I will love you. If thats whats required of me.</i> But then, neither of them knew how much love it should be. Dun was the judge. And even while Carynne and Raymond were speaking seriously, the problem here was that they each had a cynical side to them.


    Then isnt that enough?


    But what else do you think is needed?


    Feelings


    Ah, she was getting jabbed by this as well. Carynne shut herself up. Raymonds pointed gaze stung. Feelings, huh? For no reason, Carynne turned to look at the hydrangeas.


    Should she knock those over?


    Would they seed? Carynne gulped. She wasnt sure. Raymond already said that he loved her. Of course, they confessed to each other almost every single day, but considering how the confession should fit Duns criteria, neither of them seemed to be hitting the mark.


    Its difficult to quantify emotions. If its just about sleeping with him, then should she do it?


    With a delinquent gaze, Carynne looked at Raymonds body up and down.


    Carynne.


    Theres a lot of buttons there, so its going to be difficult to take off his clothes. Because she had such thoughts running through her mind, she btedly responded to Raymonds call.


    Yes.


    Fortunately, it looked like Raymond didnt notice what she was thinking. However, he had a serious expression now, and because of this, Carynne straightened out her thoughts.


    Raymond pulled out one invitation and showed it to Carynne.


    The others can perhaps be ignored, but this ones a little hard to refuse. The sender is too high on thedder.


    Who is it?


    His Highness, Crown Prince Gueuze.


    * * *


    Im very excited about how youll be going as well, Miss Carynne.


    Im excited about it too, Mother!


    Countess Elvas daughter, Lady Lianne, rushed to Carynne and hugged her. Then, Carynne lifted Lianne up and sat the girl on herp.


    Do you like it that much, Lianne? Carynne, you too, right? This is an opportunity that isnt easy toe by. People wouldnt normally be able to see him before their debut into society.


    Countess Elva was to apany Carynne. As she looked at her daughter, who was practically glued to Carynnes skirt, her eyes twinkled.


    Carynne set down her teacup and tickled the child. Lady Lianneughed and was now out of breath. Carynne and the child yed for a while as Countess Elva looked over this way with a happy gaze. Soon, Carynne asked cautiously.


    Im still young, and Im worried that I might be a nuisance. Is it truly alright for me toe?


    Carynne had been invited along with Elva. To be more precise, she was invited together with Elva to a gathering that required the countess attendance.


    The event that Elva and Lianne were going to was a social gathering for a group of young nobles, who were about the age of ten years old, along with their parents. In various ways, be it age or social standing, Carynne was out of ce. It was even stranger for her to attend without a direct invitation from the royal family. Truthfully, the fact itself that she was called was not natural.


    I think Im tired too, like Carynne. Boys are so annoying.


    Lianne!


    I really hate them. DArtagnan is smarter.


    DArtagnan was the countess pet dog. Carynne stroked andforted Lianne, who wasining of the pain of socializing from a young age. At this age, girls were more mature than boys. Though no matter how much you try to discipline them, children are children. Even if they were taught restraint and etiquette, there was a limit to that.


    Lianne, dont cling too much to Carynne. Youre being discourteous.


    Its fine, Madam.


    Okaaay. Im sorry for being rude, Carynne.


    Even so, Lady Lianne did not whine any more than that and just returned to her own seat calmly, sipping her tea.


    Carynne slightly raised her teacup as she thought about a future that would note. Dont think deeply. Youve already made up your mind.


    Crown Prince Guezes son, Prince Lewis. Will he be attending this weeks gathering?


    While covering her face, Lianne replied.


    Prince Lewis is handsome.


    This child, goodness The face isnt all that important. And you have to behave really well in front of him, okay?


    Hearing Countess Elvas chiding, Lianne pouted.


    I behave well though.


    Behave even better.


    I have to, so I will. Im going to marry His Highness and be part of the Royal Family.


    Whileughing and handing her daughter another snack, Countess Elva gave a realistic response that didnt match the childs innocent promation.


    Marriage is not the most certain answer, Lianne.


    <i> Lewis official title is Crown Princes Firstborn Son, but for the sake of brevity, hell just be referred to as Prince Lewis.</i>

 Chapter 91

    Chapter 91


    Its nothing worth listening to. Raymond didnt say anything back to Duke Luthe, who was making a humorless joke. The old duke also knew that his own words held no worth. Nobody would have believed him anyway. Who would believe any promises hed give in this kind of situation? Even if the duke was the one who held the upper hand right now and not Raymond, it would not change anything.


    Why have youe here to do this? Why are you getting involved? Will this bring you honor?


    The duke continued to try and talk himself out of this. Raymond had met many of this kind of noble. They lived their lives as though they were wielding three tongues, and as the moment of their deaths loomed before them, they just did everything they could to try andpromise.


    But even if he heard them out, Raymond never changed his demeanor towards them. Because it was all meaningless. Still, hed give them a little more time.


    In his mind, Raymond counted the seconds passing by. Too much had passed.


    Tell me, why did your king send <i>you</i> here specifically? No, was it even the king?


    I do not know.


    I definitely bribed him well enough. This is a breach of trust. A peace treaty had been signed not too long ago. A lot of people are thinking that peace wille now. Did Verdic betray me?


    Are those your final words?


    Answer me.


    I do not know.


    <i>Bang!</i>


    Curiously enough, the sound of the gun was muted. Indeed, its not a lie that this was a new weapon. The duke copsed. He spasmed a little. Raymond frowned.


    I got lucky.


    These were Raymonds ensuing words. He had always been on the side of good fortune. At least, when it came to blood stters and the procurement of guns. His nerves were constantly taut, and this was the result. He was still alive. If bad luck were to strike him, he knew hed drop dead. He didnt know for how long hed stay lucky, but so far, he still was.


    Duke, you are


    an unlucky man. Raymond was about to say that, but he decided not to. He still managed to live to that ripe old age. Duke Luthe was born a royal and became a duke, living his entire life as one of the main pirs of war. And he had children and grandchildren even when most of his descendants died at Raymonds hands. But that was just a case of them being unlucky.


    May I use your water?


    Raymond didnt know why he asked that aloud, but he feltpelled to.


    Thank you.


    Brain matter was trickling down from the corpses head. Raymond turned to the water faucet that could be found in the dukes quarters. In any case, there werent many people left in this residence whod be able to use this water.


    <i>Shwaa</i>


    Its quite practical to have a direct line to clean water like this in his room. Neither Raymond nor Countess Elva had such an amenity in their own homes so that they could have ess to water right away. For a higher aristocrat, it was very easy to set up something like this.


    Raymond washed his face and hair, both of which were dirtied by blood and grime. There was a mirror there.


    Damn it.


    Raymond bowed his head.


    <i>Bang!</i>


    <i>CRACK!</i>


    The mirror broke. Raymond felt the back of his neck growing hot. A body slid down to the floor.


    E-E-Enemy!


    He heard a voice shrieking behind him. Raymond picked up a piece of the broken mirror from the floor and threw it in the direction of the voice. <i>Stab. </i>It reached the target. He only improvised, but it worked. However, he could still hear restrained, heavy breathing behind him.


    A small voice. A young one. A girl. Why was she in the dukes room? His gun wasnt loaded. And what he threw hit her. Was she dead? No. He could still hear her breathing.


    H-Huuk


    The sounds of sobbing. Was she the dukes child? No, it couldnt be. At that age, shed be his granddaughter or great-granddaughter. But its strange.


    Everyone should be dead.


    Raymond continued to look through the curtains until the girls crying subsided. Then, there was the sound of her crawling. Slowly. To where he might not be able to see her. Considering her condition, he wouldnt even need to use his gun. No, its better to be more efficient with time.


    S-Stay away!


    Raymond counted how many more bullets he had for the gun. In any case, he seeded in putting an end to Duke Luthe. All he had to do now was wait for Zion to catch up. But how long would that take?


    A-AACK!


    <i>Thud!</i>


    Raymond hit the girl hard on the back of her head. As she copsed, her ck hair cascaded across the floor. Raymond stepped on one wrist with his foot.


    Please please no


    At most, fourteen? Maybe fifteen years old? It was a young woman. However, she was practically naked. Damn it. Raymond grimaced.


    The gun is cheap. All it amounts to is one shot. Its a sloppy pistol that can be used only for suicide. And if you dont manage to hit yourself at a vital point, you wont die. Ah, I cant believe Im thinking about this now. No, stop. Just kill her. Dont think.


    K-Kill me.


    Damn it. Raymond looked down at the young woman, who was barely even dressed. The urge to cuss rose within him. So shes a prostitute. Then, Raymond did as she said.


    <i>Crack, crack</i>


    She died instantly.


    God damn it, Duke.


    Raymond took a step towards the body of the duke on the floor. Hey there, dead, his eyes wide open. The back of his head had burst open after Raymond shot him with the gun, and his condition was nothing like the girls right now.


    He crouched down next to the dukes corpse, and he closed his own eyes.


    Duke. Duke. Take a look.


    The corpse remained silent.


    She said Im an enemy.


    Is this truly supposed to be an honorable war?


    What were you thinking when you pointed out that I killed your children and your men?


    And yet, goddamn, thest person in your room is a prostitute? Besides that, a girl thats so evidently young? Duke.


    Raymond resisted the pressing urge to kick the dukes head. Dont think. Dont think about anything. Would anything change if he were to voice his opinions? If Raymond would die, Zion would rece him. If Zion would die, Chelsey would rece him. When Chelsey would die the military would provide.


    The average number of people Raymond could kill by himself was more than ten times that of Zions. Its just more efficient for Raymond to do this. Thats all. And what would change if hed rebel against the orders he was given? Insubordination would onlynd him either the death penalty or a dishonorable discharge. What good would that do to Raymond when, all his life, he lived only as a soldier?


    I will not think.


    He repeated this to himself. Raymond stared at the wide-open head of Duke Luthe. His brainwhich would have held all kinds of knowledge, despair, ambitionwas now no different from the organs of a dead animal.


    Raymond closed his eyes. He heard a familiar gait approaching from the distance. Now, Raymond could return.


    Zion.


    Sir Raymond, you really are something. Its thanks to you that I coulde in safely like this.


    Dontpliment me. Compliments would just be the onset to something unfortunateter.


    Youre being too much, sir.


    Zion entered the room while grumbling under his breath. And when he saw the corpse of Duke Luthe, he smiled broadly.


    Whoa, that old geezers finally dead! What a dirty, long life he lived.


    Dont talk like that.


    With Raymonds scolding going through one ear and out the other, Zion started cutting one of Duke Luthes hands. It was part of their work. The sound of flesh and bones being hacked echoed inside the room.


    As Raymond began to think on his own once more, he felt a little squeamish. Not because of the cruelty of this act, but because the sound reminded him of meat being cut.


    Well be having beef for dinner.


    Perhaps Zion was imagining the same thing. Raymond scowled and helped Zion just to finish the job.


    Oh wait, whys that girl here?


    Zion asked. Raymond picked up the girls body. Shes certainly dead now. She was cold.


    Hoh, I cant believe he got himself a whore despite everything. This old geezers something else, too.


    Raymondid the girls corpse on the dukes bed. What hes doing right now was nothing but a self-serving, hypocritical act that wouldnt help anyone, but he still wanted to do it.


    She looks fairly good-looking though?


    One more word out of you and you wont be able to use your throat anymore. If you want to protect your fairly good-looking face, you better shut it.


    The ck-haired girl was explicitly dressed in racy clothes. It was ufortable to see, so Raymond covered her with a nket.


    Ah.


    What is it? Zion asked.


    Seems like shes not a prostitute.


    Raymond noticed that the girls body was exceptionally clean. This child wasnt a whore. Raymond knew well enough what they looked like, those people who rolled around the floor. And this girls features resembled Duke Luthes. The man he shot.


    <strong> Premium chapters are now avable for this novel, and you can unlock them with woopcoins. Don''t worry though! These are to be considered as <em>advanced chapters,</em> so you are <em>not</em> obligated to unlock themyou may do so only if you want to read ahead. The chapters will eventually be free ording to the [release rate] indicated at the novel''s main page, <em>or</em> as soon as a new premium chapter is released in the future.</strong>

 Chapter 92

    Chapter 92


    Is she his granddaughter? I thought all of his descendants already croaked Ah, well, theyre all dead now.


    Zion stepped closer while scratching his head. Hes trying to gauge Raymonds mood.


    After Raymond opened his eyes again, he reached forward to close the dead girls eyes. Raymond realized why Duke Luthe dressed his granddaughter as a prostitute. Its not tomit incestuous acts. This girls body was too clean for him to think so.


    What were you expecting from me?


    Duke Luthe was likely hoping that if Raymond thought that this girl wasnt the dukes granddaughter but a young prostitute, he might not kill her.


    Raymond was supposed to be a man whod feel pity towards a young prostitute, and so would not kill her.


    Because he was a famous gentleman.


    But that possibility would onlye about if he had been in his own country.


    Raymond nced down at Duke Luthes hand, which Zion had hacked off. Then, he turned to look at the closed eyes of the dead girl, lying on the bed. The duke must have told her that she should evoke sympathy so that she could be spared. But if she were to have been spared, shed choose to take revenge. Theres no way that this would seed though.


    And she would certainly aim for Raymond, who had killed most of the people here in this residence. Even if the dukes n seeded, theres no way for salvation toe.


    Will this bring honor?


    Duke Luthes words echoed in his ears.


    Dont think. Dont think about this. Raymond closed his eyes.


    And Raymond needed to think about something else now. What should he think about? Raymond wanted to have his own thoughts. He wanted to think of anything better than this. Not blood. Not pus. Not tears. Something morefortable, something more ideal.


    Seriously.


    While Raymond stared at a pool of blood, he thought of the woman he didnt want to think about. This only made him feel dejected.


    * * *


    And thats how Sir Raymond saved me.


    So cool!


    With the little girls huddled together, their eyes glistened with admiration as they listened to Carynnes story until the end. The evident excitement in their young faces was a bit burdensome for Carynne. After all, she had omitted many parts in the middle.


    In the story she told, Thomas only grabbed her by the wristhe didnt stab her with a dagger. And, Raymond fought off those men with his fists, not with a gun.


    Of course, Carynne also did not bring up the story of her hacking Thomas body to pieces in front of his son, Tom, or the fact that she hid that one part of the mans body.


    The children asked navely and innocently.


    When will Verdic die?


    Im not sure?


    Why didnt he die?


    Never mind about them being innocent. This was what Carynne thought as she observed how clearly annoyed Lady Soleia was to hear that Verdic was safe and sound.


    The viin should die first!


    Yeah! And the interest rate that Verdic Evans demands is also too high.


    What a realistic outcry. Carynne maintained the smile on her lips as she handed a snack towards Lady Lianne, who was parroting words that she must have heard from her mother.


    While expressing her anger at Verdic Evans excessive exploitation of profit, she hardly pointed out any shorings on the corrupt loan sharks part.


    Surely his wealth should be put to a better use.


    Thats true.


    Lianne looked to the side and made eye contact with Lewis, who visibly flinched in response.


    With a more determined tone, Lianne asked him.


    Of course, youll make sure to do that, right, Your Highness Lewis?


    Umm.


    Prince Lewis let out an awkwardugh, then he took the cup in front of him and took a sip of the hot tea. You have so many troubles already, dear ten-year-old.


    While the children were voicing their thoughts here, their parents at the back also had such sharp gazes as they wordlessly expressed their political stances. The atmosphere would be morefortable if its possible to one-sidedly talk smack about Verdic Evans, but the fact of the matter was that people who had <i>never</i> dealt business with Verdic Evans were a minority here. Rather, most of them were closely acquainted with the man.


    Umm Ill think about it and consider it very deeply.


    You could at the very least voice your opinion about this though. Are you trying to avoid it?


    You only need to scold a bad person, but why does it seem like youre finding it difficult?


    The girls ganged up on him. Are you doing that on purpose? Seriously?


    Carynne picked up her cup and brought it to her lips. Her throat ached a little from all that talking. As everyones eyes were now focused on Prince Lewis, Carynne could finally breathe.


    Alright Um Youre right. I personally think it would be fine to push for aw about interest rates, so


    Your Highness, Id like to ask you to expand on that please. Then, if the Head of the Assembly will propose that as an item on the agenda, would you personally support it?


    No, um, for me to say for sure


    Your Highness!


    I wonder what I was doing when I was ten years old.


    As Carynne watched the kids, she tried to think about it. She couldnt remember, so she didnt know.  Carynne  was either very thoroughly tempered by medications for her lunacy, or she was being brainwashed by Nancy herself.


    Have fun with your debates over there. Leave me out of it.


    Carynne closed her eyes and savored the tea. As expected, anything prepared by the royal family was a delicacy. Carynne was satisfied. For someone like herwho was stuck in ce and unable to move forward in timeno matter how the world would progress, no matter how the rtionship between the royal family, the nobility and the nouveau riche would change, it was all meaningless.


    Its a bit self-deprecating, but what meaning was there to <i>anything</i> when time would not pass for her? Despite these kids perhaps having potential, whats the point? Did anything matter when, in Carynnes world, none of these kids would be adults anyway?


    Who on earth made this.


    Carynne savored the taste of the biscuit that was broken down by her teeth and melted by her tongue. However, her short-lived peace was soon broken by that young tyrant.


    Ah, we wont have that many chances to meet Lady Carynne, so wouldnt it be better to ask her more questions first? You can always ask meter.


    Hey.


    Carynne felt the teacup in her hands shake.


    Oh my I dont believe my stories are worth all that much, Your Highness.


    Please dont twist my words.


    Alright. What would you like to hear?


    What do you like about Sir Raymond? Oh, dont answer right away. How about we try to guess?


    Prince Lewis asked with a smile. Carynne grew stiff.


    I beg your pardon?


    Please. Dont bother me.


    However, Carynnes silent protest was so easily ignored. Despite the imploring look she gave him, Prince Lewis smiled broadly and made a suggestion to the young nobles.


    What do you say? Ill give a prize to whoever Miss Carynne says has guessed right. You can look forward to that prize.


    At that, the eyes of the young nobles and their parents behind them glimmered. <i>We cant miss this.</i> Carynne could practically hear their thoughts.


    As soon as Prince Lewis finished speaking, a boy raised his hand.


    Oh, so soon? Speak up, then, William. You seem confident.


    Your Highness is asking the obvious. Of course, its Sir Raymonds merits. I heard that Sir Raymond had dealt with a thousand people all by himself.


    William spoke confidently. He was the youngest son of Baron Strieder, who was standing behind his son while looking at him amusedly.


    I do think that a thousand people is a bit exaggerated.


    Still though, everyone knows that hes famous for his physical prowess. And he saved you, right, Miss Carynne Evans? How can you not like him for that?


    Miss Carynne. When that kid, whose height couldnt evene up to her chest just yet, called her with that title, she felt just a bit incensed.


    Nheless, Prince Lewis nodded after hearing Williams answer.


    Thats possible, too. I also heard that Sir Raymond has such a heightened eyesight that he can see two kilometers away. Then maybe Sir Raymonds merits are what made Miss Carynne fall for him? Does anyone have other guesses?


    Prince Lewis scheme seeded.


    The boys were rather indifferent to Carynnes storytime, but they listened with rapt attention when Raymonds exploits were brought up. If Carynne was like the princess of a fairytale to the girls, then Raymond would be the knight of a fairytale to the boys.


    It was thanks to this that the matter of Verdics high interest rates was immediately pushed aside. Lady Lianne seemed to be unhappy with the topic change, but she soon joined in on the conversation.


    Umm Can Sir Raymond really jump down from the top of the cathedral?


    My house wasnt as high as the cathedral, so Im not very sure.


    Oh, shed push him from there if given the chance. Carynne was determined to do so. Raymond was alright even after jumping off the seventh floor. So she wondered, what was his limit? If he were to fall from a higher ce, his head would surely be cracked open, and hed die. Would Raymond still be able tond normally on the ground if someone would push him from behind?


    Still though, I cant imagine him getting hurt.


    Carynne envied Raymond. If she was as strong as Raymondif she was properly armedCarynne could be the mass murderer she wanted to be. She could just kill everything and still survive in the end. She wouldnt kill only weak people like children or women, and she wouldnt need to exert herself to do so.


    Fleetingly, she wondered if Raymond was shooting a bullet through a human head right about now.

 Chapter 93

    Chapter 93


    As expected, men should be powerful. I was told that a strong body is necessary not only to lead the country, but also to temper the mind.


    Was that Barons Strieders opinion? It didnt seem like thats the only takeaway. Then again, Carynne just wanted to watch everyone else and had no intention of being involved any longer. So, she watched Prince Lewis try to calm William down as he insisted that, Physical strength is the nations power! We must promote this as a national movement!


    Ah, then is it true that Carynne likes Sir Raymond for his strength?


    No, I dont think so. Williams a boy, isnt he? Only a fellow woman will know what another woman thinks.


    Lady Lianne countered the question as she waved one hand. If she had been five years older than she was now, her argument would have been more convincing.


    Carynne could sense the amusement and nervousness of the adults in the sidelines.


    Really? Then what do you think is the reason?


    Isnt it obvious? Its his face.


    Thats what Raymond said, too. In her mind, Carynne recalled Raymonds brazen smile.


    Whenever I look at a woman, all I see is her face.


    Come to think of it, was he serious when he said that? Carynne struggled to keep her expression neutral. Why did she even think that Raymond was the male lead? Because of his face? For some reason, she was half-convinced by this supposition, but at the same time, she didnt want to admit it.


    Wow. What a brave theory, Lady Lianne.


    Prince Lewis eyes grew wide as he looked at Lianne. And while looking at that brave expression on her face, Carynne sympathized a little with the girl. Prince Lewis gaze and all the attention of the male nobles were focused on Lady Lianne.


    Lianne seemed to always put a lot of importance on peoples appearance. Maybe its because of Carynnes looks that Lianne tended to stick by her side?


    What if it wasnt Sir Raymond who saved her, but his squire?


    Of course, as the master of that squire Um, couldnt that be considered as something that falls under his authority?


    B-But Lady Lianne You shouldnt judge people based on just their appearance.


    Then Miss Soleia, do <i>you</i> not judge people by their looks?


    Of course I dont. The most important thing is authority! Judging by someones face wont be enough. Miss Carynne <i>must</i> be in love with Sir Raymond because he has a higher social standing.


    While sping her hands together, Lady Soleia replied like so. She was looking up with such firm conviction in her eyes.


    Countess Elva initially grew nervous when she heard her daughters answer, but the moment she heard Lady Soleias, she rxed. Face was a better answer than <i>that</i>.


    Prince Lewis asked grudgingly.


    Then Soleia, do you like me because of my authority?


    Yes!


    And if I dont have any power?


    Then I wont like you.


    Lady Soleias answer brought upon silence to the immediate vicinity.


    I like Your Highness because youre handsome.


    Lady Lianne also replied with a very confident expression.


    Uh Thanks?


    For me, I like Your Highness because youre healthy and strong.


    William also pitched in, equally confident. With one hand to his chest, he knelt before the prince as though he was taking an oath in front of him.


    Im very thankful that you think so, William. Its a bit burdensome, so please stand up.


    As he asked William to raise himself, Lewis turned to Carynne.


    Then, would it be alright for you to consider these three answers first?


    Oh, but theres still a lot of other people.


    Carynne tried to put off her choice by pointing out the other young nobles who looked like they were itching to speak. However, Prince Lewis shook his head.


    It will be time for our luncheon soon.


    Alright


    I dont quite like being hungry.


    Thats very natural. It wouldnt be good for Your Royal Highness to be emaciated, that will be a cause for worry. We should move forward.


    Um, yes. Thank you.


    Roughly brushing aside Williams ttering remarks, Prince Lewis soon sat at the seat in front of Carynne and asked her.


    Okay, then. Miss Soleias answer is authority, Lady Liannes answer is appearance, and Williams answer is a strong body. Whose answer is the closest to yours? If none of these match, then we can ask the others. After the luncheon, of course.


    I


    Carynne tapped her fingers as she mulled over her choices. Which answer would benefit her here? Truthfully, Carynne had been bored since a while back. Whatever it was that these children thought and whatever kind of arguments they coulde up with, what did it matter? Wasnt this all just to kill time?


    She was nning to say, It just happened, Im not really sure either. If shed give a serious answer here, it wouldnt do her any good.


    I don


    You cant say you dont know.


    Somehow, he resembled Raymond. When Carynne looked into Prince Lewis eyes, this was what she thought.


    The reason she liked Raymond? Carynne didnt know what to say to that. Did she even like Raymond? Supposing that this was the initial question, she wasnt even sure about her answer to that. All she was thinking was that this world was inside a novel.


    And shes had this notion for one hundred years. She was bound to Raymond, thats how it was in the novel But did she actually even read that novel? No, dont. Dont think about it. Thinking about it deeply here would lead to a breakdown. What should she answer right now?


    Is Is my answer important?


    Carynne realized that her voice was quivering slightly. And Prince Lewis gaze deepened unexpectedly. His eyes were curved.


    Im curious about what a woman whos about to be married considers lovable.


    Hes just one soldier though. Carynne wracked her brain. She needed to think of an answer that anyone would consider good to hear. A good answer. As expected, personality?


    For the sake of my future vassals, its not bad for me to be curious about this, no? I cant imagine marrying a woman who doesnt love me. Thats too heavy of a thought. I would like to hear it in more detail, of course, since it will help me in the future as I rule my country and


    My country, huh, what a funny thing to hear.


    A cold voice cut through the people there.


    It was just one sentence. However, it was enough to change everyones expressions. The smile on Prince Lewis face hardened for a moment, but he smiled once again. This time, it was a smile that was full of courtesy and tension.


    Isnt it too early for <i>you</i> to call it my country?


    <i>Step, step.</i>


    Carynne knew. She knew who that man was. But did he act in the same way before?


    Carynne rose from her seat and immediately curtsied. All the nobles in the hall also rose and bowed down, taking a step back. The childrens gathering was now over. Theres no need for smiles andughter now. Because that man did not like that kind of thing.


    Father.


    Its been a while, son.


    Crown Prince Gueuze had arrived.


    * * *


    Youre not going to eat, sir?


    No. I dont feel like eating.


    Now seated inside a train, Raymond stared at the steak that Zion was cutting into. Only the surface was cooked slightly, and so blood dripped down from the meat. It made him feel sick for some reason.


    Zion had personally cut into the dukes flesh to decapitate him, but it didnt seem to affect him in the slightest. After cutting his steak, Zion looked up at Raymond, and when he saw how his superiors expression wasnt so good, Zion openly said, How fussy.


    Wow, for you to be so delicate now Youre acting like a 17-year-old girl.


    Not only with his expression, but also his words, apparently. Raymond nodded readily and provided a pre-rehearsed answer.


    Because Im in love these days. Isnt there a saying that you start resembling the other person when youre in love?


    Thats a very funny joke, sir.


    Thats a much more clipped reactionpared to Xenons. Xenon just looked at his master with an exceedingly suspicious look.


    While recalling his loyal servant, Raymond answered.


    Thats what Xenon said, too.


    Ah, that reminds me, why did you leave him behind? There are few servants as fit as Xenon.


    Because its dangerous.


    Raymonds quick answer made Zion protest with an outcry, and he dramatically grabbed his chest with one hand.


    How about me, wont I be faced with danger as well?


    Why are you asking such an obvious thing?


    Wow.


    Havent you already prepared to die when you swore before His Majesty? Xenon isnt on the same line of work as us. Hes just my servant. Theres no need for him to suffer, so


    Raymond trailed off. Hes alive. Thats an overwhelming oue, too. But still, he was alive. Raymond survived not at all because of the new weapon he was asked to carry.


    I have to finish my report. Wheres the inkwell?


    I havent even started eating yet.


    He was about to retire now, but was he being too lenient? Raymond thought about it for a moment as he watched the back of Zions head. Still, he decided to let it go. Zion just tended to act like this in front of everyone. He was good at his job and he didnt mind doing the dirty work. Outside his role as a soldier, however, he wasnt very sociable.


    When he was first assigned to work under Raymond, didnt he even try to blow smoke into his face? But even when he got hit until his ribs got fractured, Zions attitude remained the same. Maybe thats something good about him. Hed be the same until hed die. Raymond just sighed and got up to find the inkwell himself.


    Why dont you have even just the vegetables, sir? Theres a long way to go until we return.


    Ill eat on my ownter, so just leave me be Found it.


    Raymond opened the inkwell, dipped his pens nib in it and started writing his report. The new gun was not likely to be very useful. Raymond survived not because of the weapons performance, but purely due to his own dexterity, agility and physique.


    During that infiltration, Raymond killed more people with his bare hands or with a daggerpared to the gun. The gun would give the advantage of stealth because of its silencer, but it was unnecessarily bulky and heavy, and loading it took too much time.


    While meticulously writing the weapons pros and cons, Raymond felt a little sentimental. He thought that his bones would be buried with the military. He also thought that it was only a matter of time until that would happen.


    However, his sentimental mood did notst long.


    <i>Rattle.</i>


    Damn it.


    The train shook. The inkwell dropped to the floor as thepartment rattled. The ink was spreading out of control. Now, the floor became dirtied with the ck ink as the inkwell rolled around. Far from being emotional now, Raymond groaned.


    S-Sir Raymond.


    Theres no maid, I know. Ill clean it up.


    N-No.


    Zion tried to call Raymonds attention. While setting aside the report he had been writing until now, Raymond turned his head. Zions going to nag at him.


    However, thats not important right now. Did Zion spill the ink? For a moment, this was all Raymond thought about. He couldntprehend why Zions face was covered with ck liquid.


    Zion?


    <i>Cough.</i>


    As Zion covered the lower half of his face with his hands, his nose and mouth spewed ck blood, which then started spilling through the gaps between his fingers.

 Chapter 94

    Chapter 94


    * * *


    The children looked as though they were about to throw up because of all the tension that spiked up. The friendly atmosphere, which could be enjoyed even by the young ones here, had since ended.


    The one who stood at the top of this group was not anymore the chubby-cheeked Prince Lewisnow, it was the middle-aged Crown Prince Gueuze. Instead of originally sitting at the round tables in twos and threes, everyone now had to sit side by side at an endlessly long table.


    Count, your seat is over there.


    And those who the Crown Prince did not favor were ced at a far distance away. Rather than a social gathering, it became an event to showcase the pecking order.


    People followed after the attendants, who whispered, as they went to their new seats. And once they saw that they were unwanted seats, they got discouraged.


    Has this ce always been this big?


    To Carynne, it felt like the space suddenly became massive. This hall originally had a high ceiling and a smooth floor middled by marble pirs, but the color that once looked cream-like now seemed like the exact shade a cold tomb would be.


    Was it because the children were nervous now? Movements had also diminished. The childrensughter disappeared, and now, only the adults forcedughter remained.


    Indigestion iing, for sure.


    Carynne expressed hermiserations towards everyone. Of course, it was only inwardly. She was aware that she had to go to thest seat, but she hesitated for a moment. It was difficult to confirm her own position because she didnt know what Crown Prince Gueuzes intentions were. Still, it was better to go to thest seat.


    As Carynne headed towards the end of the table, one of the attendants behind Carynne quietly spoke to her.


    Miss Carynne Evans, that is not your seat.


    Which is it?


    Over there.


    The attendant pointed towards the seat that was next to Crown Prince Gueuze and right across Prince Lewis.


    Everyone held their breath. Some looked relieved, but some also shot her cold nces. That seat wasnt for the likes of Carynneunless it would be given to her by someone who was capable ofpletely breaching the rules of etiquette.


    When she saw that seat, Carynne halted in ce. However, the attendant behind her urged her forward.


    Please go ahead.


    That seat was essentially for a duke. Carynne slightly bit her lower lip. From there at the head of the table, Crown Prince Gueuze was staring at her so tantly. His eyes ogled Carynnes face, then roved downward towards her chest, her stomach, and even lower. That kind of gaze suited bums and loafers on the streets more.


    Why?


    Why, huh. Carynneughed inwardly. She knew the answer. She knew what kind of gaze that was. Its the gaze of a man who wanted to dig into her, between her legs. She was all too familiar with that gaze.


    Carynne moved one step at a time towards the crown princes side. Fortunately, she wasnt feeling nervous, but that didnt mean she was delighted by this situation. All eyes were on her.


    Why?


    Why was it different now? Carynne wondered. Never before had he given her such a tant look. Where, howwhat caused this change? What prompted him to do so? The only thing he had said to Carynne in the past was just one sentence.


    You look like Catherine.


    You look like Catherine.


    Thank you, Your Highness.


    This time again, he said the same thing. She wondered if it would end with this. Carynne averted her eyes and looked at the empty te in front of her. If it wouldnt go that way, then how would he proceed? He couldnt <i>do</i> it.


    Hes the crown prince. He was going to be the king. Even the nobles, who Verdic so desperately aspired to be, werepelled to bow down to him. He was the one who stood at the very top, all with the exception of the senile king.


    Well, readily offer yourself. Youre in no position to refuse.


    Carynne sat across Prince Lewis, who looked between Carynne and his father with tension and a slight sense of oddity apparent in his eyes. But it was only for a split second. This was not his business. All decisions were Crown Prince Gueuzes.


    <i>tter, tter.</i>


    The attendants came in one after another and began to serve simple dishes.


    Carynne felt entirely regrettable about the dish that was ced in front of her. She was given the same menu that the kids were having. The soup was such a small portion, and its sweetness was more suitable for the childrens taste buds.


    She had wondered if shed be able to taste a new dish she hadnt eaten in the past. Still though, she liked the almost transparent decorations made of sugar on the dish.


    I hope the food suits your tastes.


    Thank you, Your Highness.


    The nobles answered in unison. In that entire hall, Carynne was the only one focusing on the food, however unlike her, Prince Lewis was smiling almost frantically next to Crown Prince Gueuze. The atmosphere was terrible.


    Prince Lewis was the first to speak.


    Its been a while since we met, Father. Im very happy that youre here.


    Dont you know that its because I dont like seeing your face?


    Crown Prince Gueuze then pointed a finger at his son, and it was a gesture that so obviously showed just how much he was looking down at him. Looking down, Prince Lewis nheless answered politely.


    I was just surprised to see you all of a sudden.


    Of course, I seemed to have disturbed your political affairs.


    No, Father. Im very happy to see you here.


    He answered too fast. The volume of Prince Lewis voice grew a little louder in his agitation. Since the situation was like this, if you touch the food here now, youd be a real lunatic.


    Carynnes eyshes fluttered low. The atmosphere was <i>terrible</i>. Everything was so annoying and troublesome.


    If shes set to listen and enjoy other peoples stories, she should be allowed to be in a situation where she <i>could</i> enjoy herself. Its not fun to be all tense like this. Wouldnt it be more fun if Crown Prince Gueuze had shown up with an axe while shouting, Die, my son!


    Carynne saw Prince Lewis small fingers trembling.


    Do you wish to be king?


    <i>Over me?</i>


    Carynne could hear the unsaid words after that.


    No, Father. It was just a slip of the tongue because I was with my friends.


    Friend, you say, when she seems too big for you.


    Then he pointed deliberately at Carynnes chest.


    Prince Lewis was greatly flustered. Everyone knew about such a story, that Crown Prince Gueuze did not like his own son. Lewis took after the current king rather than Crown Prince Gueuze, and the current king also more obviously showed favor towards his grandson more than his son.


    Even though the crown prince was already middle-aged like this, the king would not abdicate the throne and did not appoint any of the crown princes close associates to official posts.


    However, the fact was that Crown Prince Gueuze would still take the throne when the current king would pass on. Unless, of course, if a coup would take ce.


    If I was Prince Lewis, Id think of killing my own father.


    And Crown Prince Gueuze was likely of the same mindset.


    Isnt it your first time meeting Miss Carynne Evans?


    Yes, but shes so gentle and eloquent that everyone is delighted by her.


    What an honor, little royal. This lowly youngdy is so touched that she has nothing to say. Still, its difficult to verbally agree with his sentiment. Carynne bowed her head and expressed her gratitude in this way.


    Crown Prince Gueuze stared at Carynne. He was about to say something, but he paused a little before he opened his lips once more. Clearly, Crown Prince Gueuze was showing more interest in Carynne rather than in his own son.


    Everyone, lets all eat.


    <i>tter, tter.</i>


    The sound of silverware ttering all together like that gave a strange sense of dissonance, but this was soon buried underneath the musicians performance.


    There were sixteen musicians here for this luncheon. Carynne felt relieved for the grandeur of this musical extravagance. Without the melodies being yed here, some of the people here who were so wracked with nerves might have thrown up in the end.

 Chapter 95

    Chapter 95


    Todays dishes are quite good.


    The crown princes remark didnt ease the atmosphere at all, but Carynne could at least cut the steak into small pieces, bring them into her mouth and enjoy the vor. Crown Prince Gueuzes gaze was burdensome, but what could be done about that?


    Carynne concentrated fully on the food in front of her. She focused on what she could doand all she could do here was eat the food that was set before her, regardless of whether shed be able to taste anything or not.


    Is it to your liking, Miss Carynne Evans?


    Of course, Your Highness.


    Carynne replied with a smile. And this smile seemed to please Crown Prince Gueuze.


    You really do look a lot like Catherine.


    His smooth voice, thoughced withughter, brought chills down her spine.


    Really, you take after her a lot Youre her daughter, yes, but should it be this easy for someone to resemble another person?


    Are you telling me to eat or not?


    While she looked down at the fork, which already had a piece of sliced meat attached to it, Carynne was faced with a dilemma. However when her hand stopped, Crown Prince Gueuze tapped the table with one index finger. He didnt seem to be pleased by <i>this</i>.


    Keep eating.


    Yes, sire.


    You dont have to answer. Just put it in your mouth And chew.


    Carynne did as she was told. But she couldnt taste whats in her mouth anymore. Eating was the bare minimum of human necessity, and yet here it was, being controlled. Its not an enjoyable feeling.


    Without letting her feelings show however, Carynne did her best to chew and swallow the food. Prince Gueuzes gaze was fixed on Carynnes cheeks and her lips.


    Im so moved.


    It feels like Catherine is alive.


    And I feel like Im about to die.


    Carynne found it strange that the food she was eating now, which must have been cooked to perfection by the royal familys chefs, tasted like nothing. She thought shed get used to it, she thought that shed get used to thosescivious eyes, but no. She stillcked that kind of skill.


    <i>Screech.</i>


    Crown Prince Gueuze rose from his seat.


    Was it over? Oh, no. Crown Prince Gueuze waved a hand towards those who tried to hurriedly stand up and bow to him.


    Everyone, you may continue eating.


    He just wanted to stand up. Of course, he did not have to be restrained by etiquette or formalities. He was a man who had that kind of position.


    <i>Step, step, step.</i>


    Crown Prince Gueuze sauntered slowly around the table. At first, he walked behind his son and looked down at the top of the boys head. His gaze was entirely different from that of the other nobles as they looked at their own children.


    But itsted only a moment. He soon went down the line and looked down at the heads of the nobles one by one.


    Everyone would surely beining about indigestionter, as soon as the meal was over. Carynne, however, was determined to digest the meal as best as she could. It was a childish determination to win in a situation like this.


    However, this determination faltered gradually. Crown Prince Gueuze stopped walking. He was standing right behind her.


    You, too, of course. Keep eating.


    It sounded like a request, but at the end of the day, it was an order.


    After all that, walking around the table was just something he did so that he could look at Carynne from all angles. Slowly, carefully. There was nothing left in Carynnes mouth anymore, so she had to slice another piece and slip it into her lips.


    Focus on the food. What are the ingredients? Just think about that. It tastes good.


    The way your head moves is cute. No, you dont have to answer.


    Crown Prince Gueuze was still standing behind Carynne. The back of her head stung. She chewed diligently, keeping her expression straight. She was at least relieved that she was wearing a modest dress todaybut her neck wasnt entirely covered.


    She felt the hairs rising at the back of her neck, which was exposed. But she hoped that goosebumps hadnt formed there. She felt a fingertip pointed at her nape now. Just focus on the food. The mans index finger pressed down on her neck, just at the base of her head.


    Your throat looks quite empty.


    The finger went lower. A small, weak groan burst through her lips. He pressed down at the end of the wounds Verdic had inflicted upon her.


    The weak groan was too muted for anyone else to hear, but Crown Prince Gueuze heard it because he was right behind her. It hurts. It was a groan of painbut he seemed to have interpreted it differently.


    A satisfied chuckle could be heard from behind. He continued speaking in a delighted tone.


    There was a present that I wanted to give to Catherine. I think itll suit you. Id be happy if youll receive it.


    I am deeply thankful, Your Highness.


    Carynne was subservient towards Crown Prince Gueuze in this dining table, and so she naturally schooled her features. She hoped that he wouldnt forget about the numerous nobles present here, and even his own son, Prince Lewis.


    Yes, I surely hope that you do.


    But for the man, the other peoples presence here seemed to be nothing but a trifle. Each word he spoke and each gesture he made contained underlying meanings. It might not be easy for him to act like this without saying more explicit words.


    Dont tell me youre going to pull up my skirt while Im eating. I know youve been ying around all this time, but I never thought youd stoop so low. Sure, you can take off my clothes in a ce where only obscene people are present, but its a different story in front of these parents and children, who are probably well-adjusted individuals who go to church every week to worship and confess.


    Father.


    Do you know Lady Carynnes mother well? You look very cheerful.


    The heavy and suffocating atmosphere, which made it seem like they were trapped inside the confines of ss, dissipated when the boys voice rang out. Prince Lewis courageously spoke to his father.


    Good grief.


    Carynne noticed that Prince Lewis had mistaken carnal desire with gentle sweetness. Unlike how he spoke to Prince Lewis, the Crown Prince Gueuzes tone while speaking to Carynne was exceptionally softbut that tone was far from pure. The young prince was still not aware of that difference. No matter how mature he acted, he was still too young to notice anything sexual.


    Still, it was Lewis who was clueless here, not Gueuze. And it seemed like Crown Prince Gueuze could read his sons thoughts. Heughed.


    Yes. I know her well.


    However, his voice grew deeper.


    But it seems like you asked that while already knowing the answer.


    No, Father. Im only curious.


    Carynne shut her eyes. He couldnt figure it out. Stop, just stay still. Youre just adding to my indigestion. The boys bravery made his father smile, but he was nheless displeased.


    <i>How dare you, towards me. Youre talking too much. Stop being so impertinent.</i>


    Is that so.


    His voice was soft.


    You want to know more, I see.


    Carynne felt a hand on her shoulder. It was heavy. She couldnt see the face of the man behind her, but she could easily imagine what he looked like right now. He had brown eyes like his son, but they were exceptionally light, so the shade of his irises was closer to gold than brown. Then, there was his wrinkled face, which further highlighted the cruelty of his demeanor.


    At times, he didnt look human. The color of his eyes and the wrinkles of his face sometimes gave off abination that made him look like a beast wearing the mask of a human. That was possibly the expression he was making towards his son right now. Prince Lewis face became ashen.


    I apologize immensely, Father. I spoke out of turn.


    Im afraid its not yet time for you to listen to that story.


    Hisughter was right next to Carynnes ear. Prince Lewis bit his lower lip slightly, then he also began to focus on only the food.


    In the end, all that anyone could do here was concentrate on the meal set before them.


    Carynne held her breath and picked up her knife.


    The childrens gathering ended with the awkwardness and pretense brought upon by the adults.

 Chapter 96

    Chapter 96


    It shouldnt have ended like that, but it did. Countess Elva and Lianne remained silent throughout the carriage ride back. Lianne tried to strike a conversation a few times, but when the countess silence persisted, the girl just shut herself up. Its good enough that she wasnt told to sleep during the ride.


    How was it, Mdy?


    Haa.


    She felt dirty. Finally able to let out a sigh, Carynne let out a deep one.


    Donna helped Carynne change out of her clothes. Women naturally couldnt eat much while wearing corsets, especially in social gatherings. The act of eating during a social function was a mere tool to upy ones mouth while youre on a break fromplimenting the host.


    But today, Carynne ate too much. And it was because of Crown Prince Gueuze. He continued to force her to eat while he had fun watching her. That man had nasty preferences that Carynne would never be able to understand.


    Haaa


    As the corset was being loosened, her stiff body was freed little by little. However, she still didnt feelfortable. Her back and her stomach both hurt to the extent that it felt like they were being pressed down.


    I think I have indigestion. I feel so bloated.


    Should I fetch you some digestive medicine? Donna asked anxiously.


    Yes. Please.


    At Carynnes reply, Donna went out. Carynne plopped down on the sofa, cradling her forehead with one hand. She chucked off her shoes and flung them away.


    As shey down, portraits of numerous women hanging on the wall were all looking down at Carynne. Of course, this was only in her imagination. Portraits were just thatportraits.


    Sheid back and stared at her predecessors. Their eyes were all downturned, staring back at Carynne as well. Did they all meet someone and had an ending where they fell in love?


    At the end of the line was her mother, Catherine.


    You luckily managed to snag such a man and lived happily ever after. Ah, well, I dont know about happily ever after, but anyway. Tell me though, why didnt you take care of me. What kind of attitude did you even


    Amongst the women in front of her, Carynne stared intently at the face of Catherine, her mother. She was her predecessor. Her mother. Perhaps simply  Carynne s mother. (Even still, Carynne imagines that shes from outside the book.)


    Why did you leave just like that?


    Carynne found it difficult to think that Catherine left no records. Why didnt she leave anything behind, something that was maybe more detailed? It was so ambiguous to be given just the hint of love, but even that had been an erased memory. No, perhaps not. Perhaps her memories hadnt been erased. Perhaps


    No, it cant be. Carynne rubbed her eyes. She was so tired that she was falling deep into her own thoughts like this again. Its no use. Theres a lot of other problems she must face.


    Fall in love.


    To the extent that it can be acknowledged.


    Carynne, of course, chose Raymond. Because there wasnt another man she had been as acquainted with as him. His face was fine, he had some money to his name, he didnt gamble, and there was no other woman for him.


    Although he was behaving quite double-faced in this life, it was only natural for him to do so because, well, considering what she had done so far, he was suspecting Carynne.


    Things just keep happening back to back nowadays Fine. Alright. Its okay that Im living the same life over and over. The lesson of finding true love is fun in its own way.


    The portraits hanging before her remained silent.


    But I wasnt even considering it could be a man from your past, Mother.


    Carynne wanted to cry a little. No, this really wasnt right. Wasnt that man even older than her father? He even had a son. Thats not true love. There should be something like a set of rules for romance novels, right?


    Carynne recalled the romance novels that upied her library. Among the male leads in those many novels, there were older men and also men who already had children, too. They were archetypal men who were hurt by their past lovers, kicked to the curb and left all alone.


    I didnt think it could be


    However, she knew of no novels out there where the male lead had aimed for both mother and daughter at the same time.


    Carynne sped her hands together. Please, not him. In one corner of her mind, she was aware of the clich saying of, If you want to know who the male lead is, look for the one who holds the most power, but she desperately ignored this. Dont even think about that clich.


    Rather than a logical decision to do so, it was more of an instinctive rejection.


    Is it because Im only looking at mens faces? But if I consider the portrait I saw of him, Crown Prince Gueuze was more handsome than father in their youth No, <i>no</i>. I seriously hate him. Mother probably did, too.


    Carynne looked up at Catherines portrait and agonized over this. Why did Crown Prince Gueuze make her feel so ufortable?


    What do you like about Sir Raymond?


    Thats what Prince Lewis asked her.


    Do I still like Raymond? Even now? Im not sure. What Im sure of is that Crown Prince Gueuze makes me ufortable. But why? Why does my heart feel so heavy? Murder is nothing to me, sex no longer has any meaning to me. Its the same with love as well, but why am I so confused? Crown Prince Gueuze wants me. I know that. However I dont even want to imagine saying that I love him, even in front of Dun. Why on earth am I feeling this?


    My head hurts


    Carynne drank the medicine that Donna gave her, then she closed her eyes. She didnt want to think about anything. All she wanted was to beg for Raymonds love the moment hes back. Then, she knew how hed just stare nkly back at her, tell her that she should stop reading and just go out to exercise.


    Even if all they were right now were distant conversation partners, she needed him. She needed to see him, even when he looked at her with such an aloof gaze.


    The moment Raymonds back, she decided that they should discuss thisthe matter of how Crown Prince Gueuze was looking at her.


    * * *


    Its from the Royal Family.


    However, reality never worked the way you wanted it to. As was the case with most things.


    The next morning after that, Carynne received a letter bearing the royal seal. She received no contact from Raymond.


    The content of the invitation was simple. There were instructions about the time, the ce, and for her to wear the gifts sent along with the letter. The message was simple, but the meaning behind those words was not.


    Crown Prince Gueuze sent a pink dress and a ne. Seeing those made her mood foul.


    Clothes, huh.


    It was a finished garment. This in itself was not a polite gesture. Anyone who was considerate towards ady wouldnt give clothes as a gift. It was difficult to get measurements exactly right, and theres no gift more embarrassing than ill-fitting clothes.


    It would have been more appropriate to send cloth, and if you were truly being thoughtful towards the other person, youd send a talented tailor as well.


    However, Crown Prince Gueuze sent a finished garment. As if it was her who should fit into those clothes.


    Its made entirely of silk It looks quite expensive.


    I must be, yes.


    And it was out of fashion. A light pink dress for ady with red hair? That middle-aged mans fashion sense was terrible. This dress design would have been popr twenty years ago, but hes expecting her to go out in this? Its so obvious that she would just be aughingstock.


    She took a deep breath. If she was Ise, what would she do? She might say, I''d rather die than wear that thing! Carynne could almost hear the high-pitched ringing of her voice.


    Its fine Yeah Its not like Ill die


    Still, it kinda looks ppretty?


    When Donna tried to praise the dress without so much of a hint of confidence, it didntfort Carynne at all. Donna had already gotten used to Carynnes luxurious clothes these days, so her standards were high enough that Donna herself wouldnt dare wear it.


    Besides that, the maid had a look in her eyes that said, That outfit looks like a grandmothers, seriously. However, when she saw Carynnes grim expression, she quickly changed the topic.


    But how about this ne?


    Carynne lifted the ne that the crown prince had sent along with the invitation. The dress was certainly made with grandiose cloth, but the brightness of the dress was nothingpared to the ne. The dress was the essory to the ne instead of the other way around.


    The real present was this ne. This was what the crown prince intended to send.


    What do you think? Carynne asked.


    It looks very expensive.


    Right? It must be.


    The design was fine. Jewelry designs went out of fashion at a slower pace than clothes. This ne wasnt exactly trendy. That term couldnt really be applied to the ne, since for anything to be trendy, it had to be something that anyone could get their hands on easily. Unlike any other essories, this ne couldnt be like that even after a long time.


    If my mother received this before, I dont think wed have owed anything to Mister Verdic.


    To that extent?


    Yeah.

 Chapter 97

    Chapter 97


    <small><b>trigger warning: non-consensual acts/sexual assault</b></small>


    The ne had twelve rubies and dozens of diamonds on it. The twelve rubies themselves were surrounded by tiny diamonds in a flower-like design that was harmoniously beautiful.


    The grade of the rubies was also simply the best. It was certainly a topnotch item that couldnt be measured by mere price alone. Ise, even if she was Verdics daughter, wouldnt have been able to get her hands on this.


    It was something that only royalty could bestow. And at the same time, its not the kind of gift that would be given based on mere memory or sentimentits something that would normally be given to ones consort or mistress.


    Carynne clutched her temples. When exactly did Crown Prince Gueuze start paying attention to her?


    How very obvious.


    She sighed and set the ne down again. He was showing his greed in such a hurry. Wasnt he acting like a thief who was trying to steal while the owners not around? Hes being too hasty. Too tant.


    Whoa


    In the middle of covering the ne with cloth, Donna touched it with her fingertips, gawking at it. Then, she slowly stepped back. She seemed afraid to even just touch for no reason.


    Youll be alright, Mdy.


    Carynne chewed on her lower lip. Shes so incredibly tired that its killing her. Carynne couldnt afford to even think about Crown Prince Gueuze right now. Theres so many other things guing her mind already. All she wished for was to spend this year going on a peaceful murdering spree, and yet that wish was like a distant dream now.


    Maybe its just because His Highness thinks of Mdy as his own daughter, or maybe hes thrilled just being able to recall Madam Catherine, or something


    Donna tried to look at things optimistically, however she shut herself up the moment she saw Carynnes hardened expression. Donna wouldnt have been able to say such a flowery thing if she had seen Crown Prince Gueuze. And that look in his eyes.


    He wants me to wear this and go to the pce tomorrow. I guess well find out once Im there.


    Hes not even giving her any time to think.


    Crown Prince Gueuze was not an important character to Carynne. He wasnt the one Catherine chose. Regardless of how much power he had or what he looked like, he held absolutely no value to Carynne. He wasnt the answerhes just a side character.


    Theres too many characters.


    Pardon?


    Leave the stage.


    Huh?


    Carynne waved towards Donna, who was just perplexed.


    Kidding. Anyway, its tooplicated to get involved with a big shot. Besides


    Y-Yes?


    Did you receive any telegrams from Sir Raymond?


    It has only been one day that he Um, no, there are none.


    Donna replied, going along with Carynne as she read the room.


    But Raymond was originally meant to send a telegram today. That was one of the things about him that never changed, and yet she hadnt heard from him. And tomorrow would be the third day, which was the day of his return. At the same time, it was the day that Crown Prince Gueuze wanted to see Carynne.


    Tomorrow. Conflicted, Carynne nced down at the invitation. However, what difference would her worries make in this situation?


    Right, there should be nothing to worry about. I was given a dress and a ne right on time for the visit, too.


    Yes, Mdy.


    Carynne rubbed her forehead with one hand as she looked down at the dress and the ne that the crown prince had sent. It was difficult to press down and hide the constant difort she was feeling. Carynne grew more anxious as she couldnt pinpoint the exact cause of her unease.


    Why did she feel so much dread just by the thought of facing Crown Prince Gueuze? It was something she had never experienced before, but it brought her so much trepidation.


    * * *


    When they soon met, Crown Prince Gueuze looked very pleased to see Carynne wearing the clothes he had given her. Through his lips, a satisfied croon slipped through.


    I knew it. It does suit you.


    I express my gratitude for the gifts youve bestowed me, Your Highness.


    Why didnt he just send her the ne? Why bother with a dress like this? Carynne tried not to scoff. The dress he gave her was ancient not only in its design but even with its terrible function. It was the kind of dress that would have been in vogue two decades agottened not only the waist but also the chestand so Carynne was very sure that her face was as white as a sheet right now. Oh, but the man in front of her wouldnt care about such a trifle.


    Catherine looked good in a dress like that, too. The dress she wore during her debutante was simr to that All the women who debuted on the same year got not one single speck of attention because of Catherine. Everyone had eyes only for her.


    Her waist was the thinnest as well. And her skin was the most radiant. Every move and every gesture she made was breathtaking.


    During that time, the beauty standard for women was to have a stick-thin figure, which included binding ones chest. Make-up back then was paler as well because they applied products that contained mercury, which was now banned. For a moment, Carynne sent her sympathies to her mother, since her mother must have had a harder time than herself in that regard.


    Thats why I gifted her a lot of clothes And they all looked good on her. Though she returned them all once she got married. She could have just taken them with her because they were gifts. I didnt think that shed go that far. I was really hurt.


    I shall receive these with gratitude.


    Yes, and Ill send you a few more.


    Carynne felt her eyshes trembling. In an act to establish himself as a powerful man, Crown Prince Gueuze seemed to like controlling her. She had an inkling about this when he forced her to eat that time, but being certain about it now brought her nofort. Carynne did not like how she was being controlled.


    Its a shame that women dont wear this kind of design these days. Everyones just trying to show their chests in such shallow ways. Once I ascend to the threr, Ill ban it.


    I see.


    Yes. And whats your opinion about it?


    I am still young, so I dont know much about fashion.


    He didnt even know how restrictive it was to have ones chest bound like this as he was not subjected to it. And he didnt need to know. What weight would her opinion hold here? She couldnt even tell him frankly how weird this outfit looked. In a situation like this, the answer, I dont know, was the best.


    That answer is a good one.


    And a careful one.


    Carynne was sitting opposite him on a chair. She was hoping that he wouldnt order her to raise her head. Its annoying.


    Why do you think I called you?


    <i>Arent you just obviously trying to drag me to bed as Catherines recement?</i>


    But Carynne pressed down on the urge to spit this out. Shes not crazy enough just yet to say such a thing.


    Youre trembling.


    She couldnt stop herself from shaking. Carynne tried to stop her eyes from doing so at least, but it was difficult to do so. It was out of her control.


    Why am I trembling?


    Carynne wondered to herself.


    Why <i>am</i> I shaking? Because Im afraid of dying? Or is it because Im scared to betray Raymond by sleeping with Crown Prince Gueuze? A betrayal of love? But why do I feel so repulsed?


    Why do I loathe this man.


    Is it because I love Raymond?


    Shh.


    Crown Prince Gueuze swept Carynnes hair aside. Carynne wondered, really. What was this subtle uneasewhat was this <i>disgust</i> that she was feeling. Even when she had once been drugged and had been caressed and enjoyed and devoured by many amidst all chaos, or even when she had been forced into doing it with filthy men in the back alley, she had never felt a repulsive sensation as strong as this.


    Why do I feel so dirty?


    Because Crown Prince Gueuze was old? However, when it came to encounters with nobility, it was moremon than not to be entangled with older men rather than young men. And when dealing with the royal family, age did not matter any longer. Carynne also got involved with older men before. But it didnt feel as nauseating as it did now.


    Was it because she was being forced into it? But even back then when she had been physically beaten as she was being forced, she didnt feel the same repugnance. She could even say that she could take everything in stride, no matter what kind of man it was.


    Mmph.


    Carynne did not know the reason, until Crown Prince Gueuze invaded her lips with his tongue.


    Y-Your Highness.


    It wasnt because of fear. It wasnt because of his age. And neither was it because of her love for Raymond.


    P-Please dont do this.


    Because of that person.


    The only one other than herself who she considered human. Not ink, not from this novel world, notprised of words that meant nothing. The only real person who had lived a repetitive life just like herself.


    Lady Catherine, her mother.


    If you honor my mothers memory, please dont do this.

 Chapter 98

    Chapter 98


    <small><b>trigger warning: non-consensual acts/sexual assault</b></small>


    She felt more disgusted about this than she thought.


    Carynne did not want to have Catherines sloppy seconds.


    Ah, this is also simr.


    She tried to push the mans chest with both hands, but it wasnt enough of an effective defense. This, too. Carynne was terribly repulsed by Crown Prince Gueuze.


    Did you do this even with my mother?


    Are you curious?


    As an act of courtesy towards her mother, she didnt think it would be wise to ask. She did not need to hear the answer. She did not want to hear how far he and Catherine had gone in their rtionship.


    It was simple courtesy, from one human being towards another.


    Courtesy towards the only other real person she knew.


    Even if she wasnt in this world any longer.


    If he had truly been involved with her mother, Gueuze was filthierpared to any homeless mannguishing on the streets. It wasnt just anyone else, but her <i>mother</i> who had gone through this man.


    If he ever once had anything to do with Catherine in the past, there might be a slim possibility that he was actually her father. Carynne took after Catherines looks, not her fathers.


    Even so, this man was stronger than Carynne. What should she do in this situation?


    Please dont.


    And yet, his smile just grew wider. Carynnes feeble defiance was merely fuel to bolster his excitement even further.


    Even if she were to say, Please, you cant, she knew that he would just enjoy it more.


    As expected, Carynne soon saw the top of the head of the man who considered the word, No, to be the same as, Oh, yes, I like being forced, I dont mind.


    Crown Prince Gueuze sank his teeth into the base of Carynnes neck. Ah, she might smell like his salivater.


    Mmh


    And as she looked at the crown of this mans head, Carynne frowned.


    Good lord. His hairs thinning.


    She thought back on how thick her fathers hair had been. During the middle-aged years of any man, the only opponent hed have was his own hair.


    Catherine might have rejected Crown Prince Gueuze after predicting his hair loss.


    Carynne tried to hold back herughter.


    Uhk.


    He bit her lower lip, hard. Carynne was used to this kind of situation as well. Should she resist here though? She kept being told about how a virtuous woman should risk even her own life for the sake of preserving her purity, but sermons like that were like lubies to Carynne.


    Realistically speaking, if she told him not to do it and hed follow through, he wouldnt have started something like this in the first ce.


    The crown princes other hand went over Carynnes nape and untied the strap. Now, her back was exposed. When Crown Prince Gueuze touched the gashes on her back, sharp pain began to gue Carynne once more.


    Wasnt this enough to elicit pity? Raymond pitied Carynne. What about Crown Prince Gueuze? Would he pity her?


    Your Highness, i-it it hurts


    I can see who did this.


    Your Highness.


    Verdic sought me out once before.


    Uurgh.


    He wishes for his bad daughter and son-inw to be disciplined.


    Did he ask you to discipline me with that lower body of yours?


    Carynne thought for a moment. At the end of the day, Verdic was that kind of person. After deciding that both Carynne and Raymond were no longer valuable to him, he decided to get rid of them both once and for all. And Carynne wasnt a bad bargaining chip for Crown Prince Gueuze either.


    Raymond was right.


    After removing Raymond, Carynne was handed over like this. And she had been given to Crown Prince Gueuze, thereby establishing a connection with the royal family.


    Carynne nced down at the man who was burying himself into her chest. She could feel the growing pressure pushing between her thighs. It would thrust into herter, just a little while now.


    Why do you think Sir Raymond had been deployed even though his retirement is already imminent?


    I dont want you to tell me what you know as if youre revealing a <i>shocking</i> truth. Im tired of listening to you show off and blow hot air.


    But whatever that truth was, Carynne widened her eyes and acted as though she really was shocked. She wept as well.


    How could you why


    Shh Its alright. Ill take good care of you.


    Is it possible that Raymonds noting back? But even if he wont, I still think it cant be <i>you.</i>


    Carynne imagined crushing Crown Prince Gueuzes head. She could make that possible with a gun. However, she wouldnt be able to stop this man from taking her to bed right now. She just arrived, but he already went on ahead and groped her body. Then, after he takes her a few times, an opportunity wille to her.


    As the crown prince breathed down on her, Carynne resisted against him in her own small way, calcting when it would be the right time to have his funeral.


    Your Highness, please dont do this. My mother


    Quiet.


    As though his mood had soured, he tore off her clothes. And her chest was then exposed. While breathing, her chest went up and down. Perhaps he sent these clothes just to tear them off himself. Carynne flinched away and stared at the torn hem.


    What are you going to make me wear after this?


    I love Sir Raymond.


    I believe it would be better for you to forget about him.


    Still, she hated this dress, so she didnt think that it was a waste to tear it apart.


    As she tried to push away the crown prince, Carynne was forced to shed tears that wouldnte out. Tears <i>should</i>e out, but she thought that nausea mighte out first. She had to press down on the urge to vomit.


    Please dont do this


    The crown princes eyes seemed to be imbued with remorse. However, his lips were twisted up into a smile, and his lower half was showing his lust. Just taking this all in made Carynne sick to her stomach.


    That <i>thing</i> was old. And leftovers get rotten and foul-smelling. That baton was something she didnt want passed on to her. And it seemed like it wouldnt even work well, that thing.


    What should Carynne do if Raymond was dead?


    Ill just go ahead and die.


    Carynne snickered as she stared at the top of the crown princes head, which looked quite empty as it was. She didnt have that much time left anyway.


    She had bet on Raymond. Even if he wasnt her true love, at the very least, she also knew that it wasnt Crown Prince Gueuze. She didnt even have to test it either, seeing as she could already see that he wasnt the one for her mother.


    Let me just kill him then.


    But doing that wouldnt be easy for her. Still, if her beloved fianc really was dead, it also wasnt bad to think that the plot was going down the line of a revenge drama.


    In its own way, its going to be fun to kill Crown Prince Gueuze. Then, shed be executedter, though its true that theres not much time left.


    What would be the best, then? A gun? Asphyxiation while hes asleep? Oh, thats not bad either. After rolling around in bed and letting out a load, she had seen a lot of men rx to the point that theyd go stupid. She didnt think that it would be possible to poison his food. Was there any other way?


    However, Carynnes thoughts stopped once her eyes met with Crown Prince Gueuzes.


    Youre looking at me like that, too, arent you.


    What?


    But it doesnt matter now.


    The crown princes gaze went dark.


    I wonder if you, too, will tell me that youre old.


    So, Catherine tried to tell him.


    Carynne waited for the man to continue speaking. Why did he and Catherine break up? Honestly though, it was difficult to imagine that Catherine had a choice in the matter. He was, after all, a royal.


    They were about the same age, and back then, Crown Prince Gueuze was young and had a lot going for him. Then why did Catherine reject him?


    Carynne stared at him, but his mouth wouldnt open to speak again.


    Rather than information, Crown Prince Gueuze instead wished to supply Carynne with acts of a more physical nature.


    What an unhelpful old geezer.


    Your Highness.


    Those words were not from Carynne. Rather, they came from outside.


    Carynne saw the mans eyes be tinged with irritation. The one who spoke was an attendant from outside in the hallway.


    Disturbed from his ministrations, Crown Prince leaned back. His expression became distorted. When he leaned away from her, Carynne finally breathed. How heavy.


    I told you clearly. Do not interrupt me.


    At the door, the attendant answered with a sickly pallor, barely keeping a straight face.


    Your Highness. Sir Raymond Saytes is here.


    Then, the sound of footsteps.


    <i>Ta-dak, ta-dak.</i>


    That was the sound of Raymonds military boots. Those steps were deliberate.


    See, look at that. He alwayses back to Carynne. This conclusion could be backed up by the odds of past experiences. So, Carynne wasnt surprised.

 Chapter 99

    Chapter 99


    However, Crown Prince Gueuze looked surprised, as though he never thought this could happen. He stared at Carynne, then he barked at the servant again.


    Tell him to leave.


    I will be leaving together with my fiance.


    If there was a way to match colors with voices, Raymonds voice would be the color blue. Raymond said this as he walked into the room without stopping. That deep blue voice pierced into the air. He had the kind of voice that could project without any difficulty. It was the voice of a young man.


    Ive returned from my assignment, Your Highness.


    Raymond bowed to Crown Prince Gueuze with a stiff smile. However, his green eyes were wide open. Carynne could see the barely restrained embers of anger bristling within those eyes.


    He did not lose hisposure, however, that wasnt even convincing. After seeing Carynne with her clothes torn like that, he turned towards the crown prince.


    And yet, the moment I return I see my fiance right below Your Highness.


    Crown Prince Gueuze faced Raymond and approached him. But when she saw that, Carynne had to turn away and hold back herughter.


    For the younger brother of Baron Saytes to <i>dare</i> speak like that to me. Dont you think that the world has changed too much?


    After seeing his wife in a situation like this, I believe that any husband would feel the same way and take her back. Even if its a street dog.


    The crown princes appearance, youthfulness and vigor were all inferior to Raymond, even if he would try to suppress the younger man with power.


    It was obvious for all to see. Even if he were to try and give him the death penalty, or even if he would use him as a weapon of war. Right before peoples eyes, these two men were on vastly different levels.


    Who let this scoundrel in.


    Father.


    Behind Raymond, the small prince was very evidently anxious even if he tried to hide it. If one royal were to visit another royal, nobody would be able to stop it. Theres only one person who could refuse, and that was the king.


    In this regard, Crown Prince Gueuze and Prince Lewis were on equal grounds. The servants wouldnt be able to stop Prince Lewis, and Prince Lewis hade here with Raymond.


    What an unfilial son.


    Please let Sir Raymond take his fiance home, Father.


    Crown Prince Gueuze looked at Carynne, then his son and Raymond. From the look in his eyes, he seemed to be calcting. But no matter how anyone looked at it, he couldnt anymore act more like a bastard.


    He soon opened his lips and answered in a low voice.


    I will allow it.


    And so, Raymond reached out to Carynne. She realized that there were still tears in her eyes. She must look so pitiful right now. Her clothes were torn and her chest was exposed.


    With a weak sigh, Raymond wrapped his coat around her.


    Thank you.


    With a relieved expression, Carynne took Raymonds hand, and he then hoisted her up. After bowing to Prince Lewis, they soon left the room.


    Everyone around them was silent as they crossed the hallway. The attendants, the handmaids, the prostitutes. People kept their mouths shut while following them with their gazes.


    Carynne and Raymond walked down the dark yet colorful corridor. When they went out and reached the garden, Raymond still did not speak. So, Carynne spoke first.


    I was right.


    About what?


    You came back within three days.


    In the distance, Carynne pointed towards the citys cathedral. The midnight bell had yet to ring. Once again, this time, this man returned to her. Carynne was pleased that her predictions and the odds that she knew were correct.


    I see.


    Carynne tore away the tattered fabric around her chest, then she wore Raymonds coat properly.


    This dress was seriously so tacky that I felt like dying. What a preference that geezer has, really.


    She let out a sigh. She wanted to take off the rest of the dress. The moment shed get back, shed burn it all to crisp.


    Right then, Carynne wondered what Raymonds expression was, but his face was just nk. Though maybe he looked a bit gloomy.


    Did you have a hard time while you were working?


    Carynne asked this after studying Raymonds countenance. He looked very tired. It seemed as if he rushed to this ce as soon as he was done with his assignment.


    She watched him sigh weakly.


    Yes, a little.


    Looking over Raymonds shoulder, Carynne saw that the lights were still on in the pce. Raymond spun Carynne gently forward once more.


    Im sure theyre still watching. Lets go back now, he said.


    Thank you foring.


    Theres no need for you to If it werent for me, you wouldnt have been called to this ce.


    <i>Thwack.</i>


    Carynne hit Raymond on his back. Dumbfounded, he then nced down at her as she replied.


    Its just as you guessed, Sir Raymond. His Highness, Crown Prince Gueuze seems to be the kind of person who likes eating up both mother and daughter.


    Your words


    Mister Verdic was the one who instigated it. Thats just the kind of man he is. You dont have to me yourself.


    However, Raymonds expression did not change. He still wouldnt believe it. Was he thinking that Carynne had been swept into this mess and became a victim because of him? Why should he.


    Do you have a handkerchief? Carynne asked.


    You dont carry one?


    A handkerchief is something that a gentleman carries around instead though?


    Soon enough, Carynne took the handkerchief that Raymond handed to her. The cloth was gray and it had no embroidery. It must be issued by the military. She didnt particrly like this handkerchief, but she nevertheless rubbed her lips roughly with it.


    Could this be considered an indirect kiss with her mother? As though she was trying to erase the thought of it, she rubbed her lips with the same ferocity.


    After doing so, she was going to hand it back to Raymond, but she changed her mind and just threw it on the ground.


    Ah.


    Just throw it away. Ill buy you a new er.


    Carynne stomped on the handkerchief as she said this.


    Huu.


    Then, Raymond opened the door to the carriage. Carynne took his hand and climbed into it. From inside, she had a clear view of the pceof the magnificent garden and the splendid pce.


    Her mother gave up on this. She did not find any worth in it.


    So, its not worth anything to Carynne either.


    Sir Raymond.


    He hade to save her. Carynnes knight. In the setting of this era, romance was dead and it was embarrassing to speak about honor, however, he was still called a knight. Its not just because of his honor as a soldier who had made great contributions for his country. Its because he still had a moral codebecause he still stood by what he thinks is right. That was the reason Prince Lewis admired this young knight instead of his own father. And it was the same reason why Carynne had bet on him.


    Lets go. Did you get injured?


    No.


    Truthfully, even if he did not love Carynne, there were times when he wasforting. Even if he didnt love her, he woulde to save her. After all, rather than a mere soldier, he was a knight. He wouldnt just let the crown prince satisfy his desires through Carynne. Instead, he swooped in to get her out of there.


    Compared to those who were hypocritical, those who kept up appearances, those who were cynical, and those who ridicule others, he stood far above them all. Thats why Carynne chose him. Even if there was no other benefit, even if he did not love Carynne, he was the kind of man who wouldnt let a woman get hurt and trampled right in front of him. Even if he suspected that Carynne was a murderer.


    What a relief.


    Raymond handed Carynne a nket, and as she received this, she stared back at the pce. Was Crown Prince Gueuze watching from there? Watching the daughter of the woman he yearned for?


    Carynne wondered. However, her eyesight wasnt as good as Raymonds.


    Still, theres one thing she wanted to do.


    Carynne grabbed Raymonds cor and kissed him. No, well, she was about to.


    Wait, no. Not like this.


    They would have kissed, had Raymond not covered Carynnes lips with one hand. Good god. He stopped her? Carynnes eyes widened in astonishment. Did he just reject her?


    Sir Raymond. Im really, truly hurt right now.


    No, its Others can still see


    I want them to though?


    Hearing this, Raymond looked somewhat dazed. He turned to look behind him, at something that Carynne wouldnt be able to see. Then, heughed.


    <i>Tak.</i>


    What


    But I dont want to be watched.


    Raymond closed the carriage door. Then, he pulled in Carynnes waist.


    Even after all these years, never before had she experienced a kiss as roughas desperateas this.


    <strong> End of Volume 2 </strong>

 Chapter 100: 04. A heretic’s confession - 【 Vol. 3 】

    Chapter 100: 04. A heretic��s confession - �� Vol. 3 ��


    Its hopeless. He cant be saved.


    After examining Zion, who had spewed ck blood, the doctor shook his head with an awkward expression. Im sorry. Theres nothing I can do. Zion had been poisoned. It was not an ident or a coincidencethat poisoned meal was made to kill someone. If it hadnt been for the small fluke that was brought upon by the circumstances at the time, Raymond would be the one on his deathbed right now. That meal was well-intended to kill someone.


    Raymond asked the doctor again.


    Is there really no other way?


    I apologize, but his lungs are growing stiff. Theres nothing that can be done.


    Raymond nced back at Zions face, which was turning ck. Life could be seen slowly seeping out of him.


    Raymond had seen that kind of face numerous times. The face of a corpse. However, it was a color that no one should get used to. The only thing keeping Raymond together was his own experience. He <i>cannot </i>cry here. He thought of the things he could doanything that he had control over.


    Before passing away, please allow him to confess.


    This was the best act ofpassion that he could offer. This was what the doctor advised Raymond to do.


    * * *


    A perpetual prayer could be heard inside the cathedral. As he walked along the corridor, men and womens prayers rang through. People constantly craved to receive from God. Bestow upon me fortune, bestow upon me love, bestow upon me eternal life, please.


    Prayers in search of salvation continued without end. God, may you bless us. Their prayers ascend towards the high ceiling. However, the ceiling of the cathedral was much too high. Their prayers just go up, and up, and up. Endlessly. Until, somehow, those voices reach God. But would those prayers even reach Him? Raymond looked up at the ceiling. It was too far away.


    Rather than to pray, what he needed more than ever was to wait. He tried to pray, but was not given any blessings in turn. He was afraid that if he couldnt get the answer he wanted, then he would be put to the test.


    Raymond always felt like he was being tested. For others, was life also this difficult, always? However, Raymond couldnt get rid of the doubts that his troubles seemed to be more difficult than that of others. Pain caused him pain, and pain caused him to fail that test. He touched his forehead with one finger. He loathed this kind of empty time. It made him <i>think</i>.


    Sir Raymond Saytes.


    Fortunately, the wait was soon over.


    One person walked closer to Raymond. It was a young apprentice.


    Reverend Dun has arrived.


    The apprentice quietly informed Raymond, who then turned his head. Steps resounded throughout the cathedral, and the owner of those steps was the man Raymond had been waiting to see. Dun Roid. Raymond rose from his seat. He came here to meet Dun. So he could see the priests pale face.


    Youre here.


    Raymond tried to say that he was happy to see the man, but he didnt know if it was something appropriate to say as a greeting. So, he instead held out one hand as a more casual greeting.


    Hello, Reverend Dun. Its been a while.


    However, Dun just looked down at Raymonds hand and eventually turned away. It was rude and disrespectful. On the other hand, the apprentice next to him bowed to Raymond, flustered.


    A-Apologies. The Reverend is a little Please understand, Sir Knight. Hes just


    The apprentice bowed down in an effort to restrain Raymond. Still, its not something he had to apologize for. And most of all, Raymond wasnt all that upset about this. Compared to this, there was something bigger that Dun could give him.


    Its alright.


    It wasnt as if exchanging pleasantries was important. It was an insignificant thing. Raymond did not usually dwell on something like this.


    Instead, Raymond asked the apprentice a much more important question. It was better to get to the point first.


    Is Sir Zion alright?


    What mattered to the young knight was whether his subordinate was still alive.


    Yes, sir.


    And the apprentice gave him the answer he wanted. After worrying about his subordinate thus far, Raymond now looked relieved. After seeing that wide smile on his face, Dun started walking away, but Raymond hurried behind him.


    Reverend.


    Reverend Dun.


    Dun paused and nced at Raymond. Then, he started walking again. However, he didnt stop Raymond from following him or anything. It was difficult for him to open his mouth to say no. So, Raymond followed Dun and continued speaking.


    Thank you for saving Sir Zion.


    The knight expressed his gratitude towards the priest. However, Dun just looked at Raymond and uttered a short reply.


    It is only my duty.


    It is also my duty to thank you.


    Raymond tried to sp the other mans hand, but Dun drew back.


    Then please go now. I-Ive received your gratitude.


    Dun looked visibly ufortable around Raymond. Well truthfully, it wasnt all that strange for him to be. There was one such woman by the name of Carynne who acted like a tether between these two men. If it hadnt been for Carynne, they wouldnt be as acquainted as they were with each other.


    This time, however, the connection they had changed. And Raymond decided to try holding onto that tether tighter.


    May I ask you more about Sir Zion''s condition?


    H-Hes not in any more danger.


    When their eyes met, Dun asked something else.


    I b-believe you already sent someone else. Why did you ce all the way here?


    It was an inquiry as to why Raymond was here. At this, Raymond looked back at Dun and responded.


    I wanted to convey my gratitude.


    And Ive already epted it, so you may r-return.


    Reverend.


    D-Do you have any oother business with me?


    The first reason he was here was Zion. However, that wasnt all, and Dun knew this. Feeling somewhat embarrassed, Raymond lowered his gaze. He came here for a different reason. And it was a reason that might even take more precedence.


    Raymond knew what Dun was insinuating, even if he did not point it out. However, Raymonds embarrassment should not matter here. He needed to talk to Dun. Even if it was something that he wanted to avoid.


    I wish to make a confession.


    I-I am quite busy right now.


    Dun was very obviously trying to avoid Raymond, however Raymond had no intention of letting him slip past. This couldnt be put off any longer.


    Raymond couldnt gauge how much time he had left in his leisure. Crown Prince Gueuze had already started to move. So, Raymond had to talk to Dun. He needed to confirm it.


    When will you have time?


    I-I dont know.


    I wont return until you have time.


    Duns face was then painted with displeasure, however, Raymond held out both his hands. He would not back down.


    I wish to make a confession.


    Right now.


    Eventually, Raymond managed to persuade the ever-so-timid Dun to go to a confessional booth.


    <i>Taaak.</i>


    The air was damp and cool.


    The dark confessional booth was made of aged oakwood, thick and heavy, which might bring tranquility to peoples hearts. Raymond sat down and closed his eyes. Through the screen, he waited for Dun toe in at the other side.


    The confessional booths were located at the back, in a quiet ce that was separate from the main hall, where most people were. It was a ce that not many frequented, and so the confessor and the priest, who would listen, did not usually hide their identities. Still, thats also why a more diverse set of people tended toe here.


    I havee here to make a confession to you.


    As Dunwho was wearing a purple stolesat across from Raymond at the other side, he opened his lips to speak. It seemed like Dun didnt usually hear confessions. Everything about his movements looked awkward.


    Even so, when Dun sat down and faced Raymond, this made Raymond feel a bit peculiar.


    What kind of rtionship did he and this man have? Back then when they met at the Hare residence, Raymond thought that the man before him was a slightly less sociable man. Then, after that. And, after that as well. As Dun became entangled with Carynne, Raymond found it difficult to figure out what to think of him. However, theres something that he needed Dun to confirm.


    I have sinned.


    What What sin have youmitted?


    I killed someone.


    Raymond told him a sin out of formality. He wasnt here for this. Both Raymond and Dun knew. Murder was the greatest sin of man, but not when it was his job. He hadmitted a greater sin. Raymond thought it was far more seriouspared to taking another mans life.


    I am doubtful of someone.


    Who are you d-doubting?


    Raymond looked at Dun.


    Reverend Dun. It is you who I am doubting.


    Dun did not say anything in return.


    I am doubtful of you. I suspect that you are an aplice to Carynne Hare. That you helped her kill and hide the bodies, that you set fire to the mansion and made Ise Evans be that way.


    Raymond continued, staring through the screen and into Duns dark eyes.


    May I be forgiven for my sins?

 Chapter 101

    Chapter 101


    The hymns echoed between the two, the melody unbefitting of the current situation. Raymond stared at Dun. Dun stared back at Raymond. Unlike how he was in the hallway, he did not avert his gaze. He didnt even look afraid. Dun stared at Raymond with an unreadable look. Then, he answered.


    You dont need to seek forgiveness. I-In your situation, its only n-natural to doubt.


    Do I?


    Raymond took in Duns answer. He was not surprised. Hadnt he anticipated this answer, too? The fire of that day, tooit was unnatural.


    Raymond lowered his head and inteced his fingers. Even if he were to confirm the truth here, he couldnt help but feel strange. For some reason, Raymond could feel something wriggling around his chest.


    Raymond closed his eyes. He listened to the hymns being sung at the main hall, far away from his ears. <i>O Lord, thy heavenly grace impart.</i> The incongruous hymns continued to echo. Raymond felt a surge of emotion that could not be his own feelings. He opened his eyes, and he saw Duns red face.


    I understand. Thank you.


    D-Do you have anything else to confess?


    Please forgive me for not being able to trust you, even now.


    What?


    The priest was clumsy in all manners. Even when it came to lying.


    After hearing the other mans answer, Raymond became certain. Dun might try to hide it behind his silence, but Raymond knew. He didnt know exactly what he was thinking inside, but this was enough for Raymond to confirm it.


    Raymond looked up again at Dun. He seemed to have given up a little.


    For my ignorance, may the Lord forgive me for this sin.


    Sir R-Raymond?


    Thank you for healing Zion. You are an instrument of God, and I apologize for doubting you for a moment.


    Raymond rose from his seat. Duns expression changed.


    W-Wait.


    You are not the type of person who can kill your fellow man.


    Not unlike Raymond.


    Thank you for listening to my confession. Do take care.


    !


    Following after Raymond, Dun left the confessional booth. With light casting down on the priest, he looked more ungainly. He reached out with a slender arm and grabbed Raymond.


    Why did youe here?


    I came here to confess my sins. I know it myself that Ive sinned, so I came here to confess and then go back.


    Through Duns reply, Raymond saw how willing he was to defend Carynne. That was enough. And he was also thankful towards the priest for saving Zion. However, Dun held Raymond back this time. His expression had be distorted.


    Did I not say t-that you have not s-sin sinned?


    Yes, I see.


    It is not a sin to doubt.


    Dun gripped Raymonds arm tighter. But to Raymond, who was a well-trained soldier, that grip was just feeble.


    All you said was that its natural to doubt because of my situation.


    I, I


    Raymond grasped Duns arm and gently pulled him off.


    I apologize, Reverend Dun. I cannot believe.


    I-Is this because I sasaved that soldier? A-Are you so sure that, that I am not a killer?


    Dun asked, under the impression that his deed of saving Zion was what reversed Raymonds suspicion on him. As if to say <i>Do you think that I cant be the kind of person whod kill someone else? Are you saying that Im a coward?</i> Like a man pretending to be evil.


    Goodness, Reverend. Have youe to regret saving a man?


    Thats what Duns face was saying. Raymond felt a bit bitter due to this. Through good faith and good intentions. There was once a time when he believed that the world was based on such values. However, theory and practice were two different things.


    Reverend, it would be best to keep your voice down.


    Footsteps were approaching. Those steps soon receded though, and then there were no other signs of movement along the corridor. Still, however, the hymns continued. Those melodies reached even outside.


    Raymond grabbed Dun by the shoulder. He could feel the priest shaking. This was, in a way, an outward act of calming him down, but it was nothing else but a threat. Raymond spoke quietly near Duns ear.


    Dont worry too much, Reverend.


    Raymond decided to live with his sins.


    * * *


    Raymond Saytes had one simple criteria when meeting women. Just the appearance.


    Raymond Saytes was just an ordinary man.


    Although he was quite handsome, he wasnt particrly that different from any other man because he had been surrounded by many dashing boys among his peers while he was growing up.


    Since these young lords were born into nobility, most of them were neat and affluently dressed. They grew up in their countryside fiefs and yed in the mud in front of their families, and Raymond was no different. Thats why its hard to say that he had an exceptionally different childhood.


    As rural boys usually were, he believed that ones outward appearance was useless. He had been a young boy who enjoyed wrestling and ying around rather than dressing up.


    At that time, he had been showered withpliments as people would say, Youre so handsome. Whenever he heard this, he would thank them graciously while in front of them, but at night before he went to sleep, he would scribble on his face and wish that hed get a scar on his face like a pirate, thinking that it would be cool. Thats the extent of his concern for appearances.


    He was nimble and quick on his feet, but back then, no one imagined that hes suited to be a soldier. At that time, rather than Raymonds reputation as a member of the Saytes Barony, people were more interested in the households major trades, such as meat and wool.


    The sheep they were raising were strong, the territorys weather was good, and the people were easygoing. Although they had been slightly pushed out from politics, the ie of the barony was stable, and he was simply the son of a peacefulnds lord. His father was brave and his mother was kind, and so it was not out of the ordinary that their child turned out to be strong and kind, too.


    No one doubted that he had a bright future ahead of him because he had everythingappearance, health, a good personality and intellect. Apart from that, his parents and his older brother cared for him as well.


    Raymond, what do you want to be when you grow up?


    Raymonds older brother had already started taking sessorship lessons, so Raymond had more paths open to him regarding his future. Most of the householdsnd and property would go to the sessor, but the second son was at least free to choose for himself.


    The young Raymond thought that this was a lot cooler, so he had no problems with this. It was a childlike method of believing and facing lifes trials and hardships. And so, back then, Raymond wanted to be a schr.


    I want to study more.


    Seeing the childs attitude be theplete opposite of the first son, his father chuckled. Raymonds wish to study was an exemry and pure endeavor into learning more about the truth of the world in his life. It wasnt about making money or diving into the arts, and it wasnt the same kind of discipline that a priest would have in his worldly suffering and divestment.


    It wont be easy.


    What the. Brother, dont pick a fight with me.


    Handsome men have a difficult time living in the world. Once youre fifteen years old, Im sure women wont let you go.


    Does Brother also live like that?


    Of course.


    The baroness patted Raymonds head.


    Live as you please. Still, studying wont be easy.


    It was a peaceful time. In the same way that children from other happy families did, Raymond loved his family. Sunlight streamed through the gaps of the trees leaves, and white sheep were grazing in the wide meadow. Several shepherds waved towards the baron and baroness, who were watching from the side. Though he was not conscious of it, Raymond was happy.


    It was a beautiful period in his life.


    Yet, as with everything, those days were bound toe to an early end.


    My head


    Mother?


    One day, his mother winced andined of a headache. Her fine features became distorted. Then, the baronessy sick in bed as she copsed. The doctors rushed in. Raymond tried toe near the baroness, but his brother stopped him.


    You cant.


    Why? You went in though


    Raymond pouted, but that didnt work.


    Its okay for me to go in because Im an adult, but youre still young so you cant. Go to your room and pray.


    Father! Brother is stopping me from going in!


    Raymond clutched his fathers pants, but his father also had a grave expression. The baron took off Raymonds hands from his pants, then he held them tightly. His fathers hands were too hot. The expression that Raymond saw on the barons face made it more difficult for him toin.


    Raymond, listen to your older brother. And The doctors here, so it will be fine. Just wait a little more, please.


    Why cant I go in? Why is Mother sick?


    Ill tell youter.


    The adults entered the room. After being left out alone, Raymond grew sad. He was also part of the family. He was also worried about his mother.


    Raymond didnt give up. He leaned forward, resting his ear on the door.

 Chapter 102

    Chapter 102


    From outside the door, Raymond listened in on what one doctor and the baron were talking about.


    Its dangerous, Baron. We dont know whats causing these fevers, but the number of patients has increased rapidly in other parts of the country as well.


    The baron grew troubled by the doctors words. When the baron asked back, Raymond was unfamiliar with how troubled his voice was. Its something he had never heard before.


    Is there a way?


    Nothings certain for now. But the first thing we need to do is immediately iste the others. Its dangerous, so it would be better to send the children and the elderly elsewhere.


    And so, Raymond was then sent to the local parish, entrusted to an old priest who was a rtive. Raymond knelt before the altar and prayed. However, he did not feel nervous.


    Ray, are you doing alright? I know how difficult it must be, but lets pray together.


    Im okay, Reverend.


    Raymond held the hand of the priest, who seemed to be more anxious than him.


    Reverend. Mom cant die, you know. People who have faith dont need to feel nervous. Thats what you taught me.


    Baroness Saytes was a good person. Raymond was not anxious because he was full of faith and conviction that his mother would not die. The baroness had fallen sick only because she was exhausted from the usual volunteering she did for the poor. Even if she was sick with a contagious disease, God would take pity on her and take away her illness.


    His mother was a good person, and it was impossible for a good person to die while doing something good. Raymonds world was built upon that notion. Good people would be blessed, bad people would be punished.


    When the old priest nced down at him without saying anything, Raymond did not know what this meant. Just how worried he was.


    <b>Mother and Father passed away.</b>


    His parents, who loved him, died. The young Raymond could not return home for a long time after he received that telegram. It was a priest who gave him that telegram.


    Raymond stared at the piece of paper for a very long while. This was something that children usually would not be able toprehend. The priest expected to hear him screaming or wailing, but Raymond remained silent for a long time before he finally asked.


    I cant see my parents?


    What he meant was that, couldnt he see even their bodies? However, Raymond couldnt utter the words. He couldnt understand the sorrow and despair he was feeling at that time. Because it didnt feel real.


    The priest thought that Raymonds reaction was like this because he was mature or well-behaved, but Raymond himselfter found out that he had the same reaction as many other children who lost their parents.


    Grief was not an immediate thing because it just did not feel real.


    Above all, Raymond just wanted to see his parents again.


    I want to say goodbye before theyre in their caskets.


    The priest answered Raymond cautiously.


    Itll be difficult to do that. They passed away from the gue, so they will look quite different.


    It doesnt matter.


    Raymond replied defiantly.


    It doesnt matter to me. Reverend, please allow me some time to see my parents.


    You cannot.


    Is it because Im still young?


    Because of the gue. Youll be at risk of getting infected.


    It was only after the baron and the baroness had been buried six feet under that Raymond was able to return home. In the meantime, Raymonds brother became the new baron.


    Before the priest sent Raymond back, he told the child,


    The Baron has changed. Dont be too surprised.


    Yes.


    And as Raymond returned home, his older brother, Baron Saytes, weed him with a new face.


    Youre back, Raymond.


    Its been too long, Brother.


    What the priest said was an understatement.


    Raymond had mentally prepared himself for this, but he could not find his brother in this new barons face.


    The baron was a young man in his prime and he did not perish from the gue, but traces of his hardships remained on his countenance. His skin became mottled, his nose was now deformed, and his body was blotted with skin resembling a mountain range. The previous bright figure of the young man was nowhere to be seen.


    Im so happy that youre alive, Brother.


    Through small slits through his swollen eyes, the baron looked down at his younger brother. Then, he responded with a hoarse voice.


    Go to your room.


    His voice sounded like a beasts groans. Raymond went up to his room without saying anything back. No words offort or sympathy were exchanged between the two brothers who lost their parents. It was too fast, too much. They couldnt cope just yet.


    The elder young master I mean, His Lordship will get better soon.


    Said one attendant who apanied Raymond upstairs while carrying his luggage. Raymond looked up at him.


    Okay.


    His Lordship is having a hard time, too. At times like this, it will definitely be better if brothers can help each other out.


    <i>Creeeak.</i>


    Staring into his empty room, Raymond wondered for a moment if he opened the wrong door. However, without having to step back outside and check if it really was the right one, it was definitely his room.


    My things arent here?


    Its been ordered that they must be burned because of the gue.


    Okay.


    Raymondy on the unfamiliar bed. It was covered with rough cloth, and the bedframe was coarse, as if it had been made in a hurry. Even so, he could bear this.


    I think Brother disappeared.


    Raymond tossed and turned all night while thinking about his brothers face. He recalled the old stories he heard that had monsters, but across those many stories, he thought about the one that had a good monster.


    Brother isnt going to change. The important thing is his heart.


    However, Raymond was too young.


    It would take a miracle for a sick man to retain a good heart.


    * * *


    <b>I dont think we are meant to be.</b>


    It was a short note. But it was enough.


    Baron Saytes fiance broke their engagement with a single line. No reason, no pretense and no excuses in that one sentence. She was not afraid about getting criticized for being rude.


    Not once before have I received such an honest letter from that woman.


    The baron ruffled his hair, which resembled Raymonds. Now, all that Raymond could recognize from his brother was his hair. Even his voice had changed. His ex-fiance would have thought the same thing. Just like Raymond.


    So, Raymond thought it was only natural, but he was not the recipient of that letter. The baron picked up the letter and waved it at Raymond. He let out a raspy chuckle that went, <i>hiik, hiik.</i> His shoulders were trembling, almost as though he was twitching.


    She always used to send letters full of formalities, each three pages long.


    Brother.


    Isnt itughable?


    There was no need for her to beat around the bush. She didnt even have to be cautious about what she said anymore.


    Im the same, but my surroundings have changed.


    No. Youve changed, Baron.


    Just one look at the mirror would make this obvious. But apart from that, even the way he walked and the way he breathed was different.


    And it wasnt just his outward appearance. His appearance was the beginning of that change. Surely, the baron himself knew this as well. Theres no way he couldnt know.


    But Raymond could not say this. Both brothers lost their parents, but it was only one brother whose health deteriorated. Raymond had not changed.


    Brother, lets think about recovering your health first.


    She must be clinging to some other guy right about now. Did she throw the ring I gave her? Funny. Why didnt she send it along with the letter? Does she know how much that ring is


    Seeing the baron mutter these things to himself brought Raymond pain. But thats not whats important here.


    Its just a ring, Brother. Theres something else that matters.


    <i>Please stop His Lordship, Young Master.</i>


    The sheep are giving birth to stillborns. The ratio is getting too high. I believe we need to do a major investigation on this.


    What matters here is how that wench abandoned me just because I fell ill. That woman is a whore. A <i>whore.</i> She clung to me for my money, and she left when she couldnt get any. No, shes even worse than a whore. An engagement is a promise thats made to be kept. She <i>promised</i>, so


    Brother, what you lost is not just money. Your body has changed, your personality has changed, the territory has changed. Thest one is the most serious one. Not just the attendants, but the butler and the aides expressions became more and more grim because of it.

 Chapter 103

    Chapter 103


    Brother, please think about whats happening right now. James asked me if its possible to take a look. I think you should take a look, too.


    The territorys situation grew worse and worse. When people held onto him and asked for his help, at first, he felt responsible for and proud of the duty he was saddled with. Its as if he had be a true member of the barony now, an important person whod contribute. Like he had be an adult.


    But as people continued toe and see him, he soon realized just how serious things had really be. They all kept begging the teenage greenhorn to coax the baron out.


    The sheep are in bad shape right now. The fiefs residents are saying that theres a surge of stillbornmbs. I left a report on your bed, Brother. Did you read it?


    The territorys condition teetered more and more for the worst. It had only been a few months since the people had fallen victim to the gue, but this time the sheep were dying. The adult sheep werent showing any symptoms yet, but it was worrying how that newly bornmbs were like that.


    I think we need to gather and have a meeting, but Brother, you need to write letters to inquire what condition the other areas are in.


    Hey.


    The barons voice growled out. Raymond looked up.


    Cant you just <i>shut up?</i>


    For a moment, all Raymond could do was gape in surprise. No one had ever talked to him like that before. The baron and Raymond had arge age gap, so they never really had any serious arguments. They only ever had small, teasing scuffles before whenever the baron had been a bit a bit mean, but even then, their parents would stop him.


    But what did he say to Raymond just now?


    Before Raymond could recover from the shock however, the baron continued.


    So right now, a little punk like you is saying that Im out of my mind when Im already disgusting as it is, huh. Hey, so are you the only one whos sane here, thats what youre saying? The sheep, what? The sheep, you say? What kind of situation exactly is going on with the sheep that its enough to allow <i>you </i>to speak like that to <i>me?</i>


    Raymond bit his lower lip. The situation was dire right now. There were many more important issuespared to any broken engagement. Should Raymond haveforted his brother first as his family? But from his experience, the baron had only taken any constion sent his way as mockery.


    Brother, Im sorry. But


    Are you talking back to me? Disgusting punk. You think youre the Lord now? Huh? Hey, youre nothing but a kid whos freeloading in <i>my</i> house. Do you feel good right now? Are you happy to pretend like youre the Baron? Thats why you keep hounding me with this bullshit, huh?


    Brother! What are you saying!


    Ive seen a lot of disgusting scoundrels like you. ttering and trying to get someone to be on your side only to take their fortune and peerage title, then after taking it all, youll bare your teeth. Disgusting rat Doesnt even know how to be thankful to his older brother.


    Brother!


    <i>CRASH!</i>


    The baron threw a flowerpot. Raymond watched the ss container get smashed to pieces. The flowers previously inside them were withered. The person who used to care for that flower was Amy, who died along with her mother. No one had reced her since then.


    Raymond had been thinking about that, until the baron grabbed him by the cor.


    The baron had changed.


    The young man, who had once been cheerful and dashing, had now be a parasitic monster inside this household. People would note near him anymore. <i>Thuds </i>could be heard inside sometimes, clothes being torn at other times. The sound of things being broken as well.


    Tensions rose inside the mansion. Raymond hated this atmosphere. This kind of atmosphere was even more strange and horrifying because he had never experienced this before. The servants now avoided the baron entirely, while they exaggeratedly acted bright and cheerful in front of Raymond.


    Peoples side-eyed nces.


    Peoples mocking sneers.


    All the eyes that were directed on Baron Saytes were stained with fear and disgust. Raymond did not know it at the time. Because he never saw it personally. And people didnt look at him like that.


    Raymonds overturned routine was so new to him. All his attention went to enduring his brothers change, not having any opportunity to grieve their parents demise.


    The portraits left behind of their parents immortalized their gentle faces, but that sentiment was there only because of how heavy Baron Saytes existence was. Raymonds deceased family lived on in his memories as kind people, while his only living family was cruel. That was the problem.


    Today as well, O Lord, thank you for providing our daily bread.


    And it literally was just bare essential. Raymond stared at the meal in front of him and realized how exceedingly different his home was from before. His meal consisted of oatmeal, bread and chicken. That was all. It was a frugal meal that couldnt bepared to what he used to have before.


    If the territory lords household had meals this bad, how much exactly had the situation deteriorated?


    When Raymond couldnt pick up his silverware, the baron snarled out.


    You find it hard to eat with me, is that it?


    What?


    You look like youre losing your appetite.


    What are you talking about, Brother. Thats impossible.


    Raymond replied hastily. However, the baron didnt seem convinced by this. His thick, mottled chin twitched as he spoke.


    Thats exactly it. You look like youre about to throw up.


    Brother, please dont think so drastically. I was just thinking that


    Raymond trailed off. He was just thinking that this household was ruined. But was this something that he could say? While contemting whether he should or should not, the barons expression crumpled up as he pushed his te away.


    What do I even expect from you?


    Brothers must work together to ovee their hardships.


    But Raymonds hardships were from his brother.


    Baron Saytes attitude got worse and worse, while Raymond had fewer and fewer people to talk to. Just like any other older brother, Raymonds brother was sometimes mean, but their parents always intervened and stopped things from escting. However, their parents were no longer here. Raymonds only guardian was his older brother, Baron Saytes.


    * * *


    Are you also going to see His Lordship?


    Xenon!


    Xenon bumped into Raymond in the hallway, and he raised a hand.


    What happened to the estate?


    Xenon was a hunter, and he rarely came to the mansion in person. Raymond rarely ever went to the hunting grounds after the previous baron and baroness passed away, so he was very happy to see Xenon.


    Xenon had a knack of demonstrating cool things that boys went crazy about. He tended to smile andugh a lot, but right now, his demeanor wasnt as bright.


    I have something to tell His Lordship. Are you doing alright?


    Im fine. But Brother is


    Raymond was heartbroken as he thought of the baron.


    Brother is isting himself more and more inside his room. He needs toe out and move. He needs to talk to people.


    Who said that?


    The doctor.


    Its what a smart person says, so it must be right But I dont really know much about that.


    Huh? Then, Xenon, do you think its better to leave Brother alone?


    Sometimes that helps, too.


    Thanks for the advice. But I dont think thats the answer either. If we leave Brother alone, hed just continue like that.


    Squealing like a pig.


    Raymond started walking as he spoke. Xenons advice didnt sound very helpful. However, even if he felt that, Raymond needed to remain courteous. Unlike the baron. No, dont think too deeply about it. The baron was the only family he had left.


    Do you have to meet my brother right now?


    Pardon? Did something happen?


    Xenon looked down at Raymond in surprise. The barons office wasnt all that far away now. Raymond sped Xenons hand.


    Yesterday, the Evans familys servants took this months budget. They said its to pay for the interest.


    What? Hoh Theyre really taking advantage of the situation, arent they.


    Thats why he might be in an especially bad mood today.


    Young Master Raymond.


    Xenon spoke grimly.


    Dont be surprised.


    Huh?


    Please dont be surprised. I heard from James. His Lordship isnt working at all right now. The situation is grave, but all the Baron is doing is to scream and yell inside his room. James is trying to do what he can, but even that has a limit.


    What are you talking about?


    You remember Count Landon? The godfather of both you and His Lordship. The Count sent a letter, but the maids said that His Lordship tore it apart I dont know what its about, but I heard that the Count sent a letter directly addressed to <i>you</i>, Young Master Raymond. Not to His Lordship.


    In other words, the count considered Raymond to be the actual sessor of the household.


    So thats why James, the butler, had such a gloomy look when their eyes met as they passed by each other. Then it wasnt surprising why his older brother was so sensitive around him.


    Raymond felt dizzy. He was only twelve years old. The burden on his shoulders was too heavy.


    Im too young. And I dont want to take whats my brothers.


    Young Master.


    Since Brother was dered as the heir, its his rightful position. Youre all thinking out of line.


    I dont really know much about that, but Anyway, James will tell you about it soon, Young Master. Ive told you in advance so that you wont be surprised, but, ah, gosh.


    Xenon scratched his head.

 Chapter 104

    Chapter 104


    What do I do?


    What do I <i>do?</i>


    How am I supposed to live?


    Would it be easier if I just died along with my parents?


    Inside a confessional booth, Raymond asked the priest who was his rtive. The priest then answered, clutching the hem of Raymonds sleeve.


    God puts the people he loves up to a test. You should not doubt His love.


    So God gave me such a test because He loves me?


    What He ns for us is so very profound that its sometimes difficult for people to understand.


    The priests words could not reach Raymond. However, Raymond did notsh out at the priest. He was too young to tell an adult about the injustices of life.


    Still, he felt a sense of frustration, so he asked.


    Is that also the same answer He has given to other people?


    Yes. The test that God provides is truly, very hard. We can only beg that He does not put us to trial, or that He gives us a test that we can handle.


    Then, my parents couldnt bear the test?


    He thought of his own parents. Raymond remained unconvinced. Still, the priest quickly denied Raymonds suspicions. He needed to say something appropriate to the child. He needed to soothe andfort him.


    No, thats not it. Its just that, good peoplee back to Gods embrace quickly. There are many things theyll be doing in heaven.


    Then people who are still alive arent good? Are you and I still suffering because we are sinners?


    The priest looked terribly distressed. If Raymond was a little older than he was now, he wouldnt bother this sincere, countryside priest who was his rtive.


    However, Raymond was young, and he was suffocating in his own pain.


    Rather than being tested like this, if I was buried with my parents, wouldnt all the pain go away?


    Raymond!


    Why, whats wrong?


    Dont say that. Being alive is a blessing. And it cannot be right to think of death. Dont ever say that in front of me ever again. Your life has been given to you by the Lord, but if you regard it carelessly, you will be sent to hell.


    Why was it a sin for a living person to think of death? It was so, so hard to continue living, but why was it a sin to want to go back to His Arms? Why was it a sin to be together again with his loved ones, who went before him?


    Questions poured one after another, but Raymond could no longer speak about the dead.


    Because the priest looked even more distressed now.


    So, Raymond asked something thats easier to hear.


    How can I get along with my older brother?


    This question allowed the priests expression to lighten up a little.


    Now that the priest could regard Raymond as a younger brother who had a disagreement with his older brotherrather than as a child who lost his parentsit was much less burdensome.


    The Baron is ill. Im sure that he can ovee it if you support him as his family.


    Its fine.


    Brother is sick.


    Thats what Raymond believed. Light once again shone in the sky. And Raymond decided to try harder. He wasnt ill, but the baron was ill. There must be a reason why its like this. A reason that humans couldnt understand. Theres no need to be frustrated by this. Theres no need to be sad. Humans had their own limitations.


    All he had to do was forgive his brother and love him.


    He should just do his best.


    Theres no need to dislike someone whos ill. No need to hate.


    His duty as family was to love.


    To love and to care.


    This is my younger brother, Raymond.


    And then, one day, that man came.


    Verdic Evans.


    * * *


    When Raymond first met Verdic, he couldnt get rid of the impression that he had already seen that face from somewhere before. Verdic looked too young to be a middle-aged man, but too old to be a young man.


    Young Lord Raymond. Its nice to meet you.


    Yes. And your name is


    I am Verdic Evans. Im sure weve met once before. I was present as a sponsor at Count Landons gatheringst time.


    Where exactly did they meet? Raymond tried to recall. He traced back through his not-so-long experience, but he couldnt be too sure.


    Raymond hadnt met any aristocrats other than his rtives alone just yet. And when he was meeting others with his family, he didnt have the responsibility of greeting them. He wasnt old enough yet.


    I apologize. I havent been very attentivetely, Mister Verdic Evans.


    But from now one, he would need to remember and behave.


    Raymond shook Verdics hand. He was a normal man with a moderate grip, with a moderate height. The soft texture of his hands imparted that he didnt seem to enjoy hunting. This was what Raymond thought as he held the mans oddly smooth hand. Gripping the boys hand, Verdic grinned.


    There is no need. It was a lie.


    What?


    It was a lie, Young Lord Raymond. Just a small joke.


    It was fun for the man to see Raymond panicking.


    Verdic then turned to the baron and smiled as he spoke.


    As you said, Baron, hes a good young master who cant tell even a small lie.


    And as you can see, hes also healthy. His looks are also fine.


    Yes, I suppose so. Right now He looks very much like thete former baron.


    Looking carefully at Raymonds chin, Verdic grabbed the boy by the shoulder.


    Hes quite tall for his age, and it seems like hell grow even taller. Thats good.


    What are you doing right now?


    Raymond struck Verdics hand. Its unpleasant. It was not polite for anyone to be this close, especially when its your first meeting. Besides that, the mans attitude right now wasnt indicative of familiarity or anything.


    Amodity.


    Thats how Verdics eyes were looking at him, like choosing a cow or a sheep.


    How unpleasant. Why are you being like this to me?


    When Raymond protested, the baron growled.


    Raymond. Be polite in front of Mister Verdic.


    His remark showed more consideration towards Verdic.


    Haha, dont be so harsh on him. Isnt he still young? And family members need to get along well with each other.


    Why was this stranger trying to interfere in their family affairs? Who was this stranger who was casually spewing such words that their rtives would also cautiously utter?


    But Raymond couldnt speak hastily here. Those two men were conversing without any concern towards Raymonds presence here.


    If this doesnt please you, then Ill fix his attitude.


    No, no. Its fine, but I do think that educating him would be necessary.


    Ill keep that in mind.


    Very well. Hm.


    Then, Verdic stared at Raymond with a slightly strained smile. The baron turned to look at Raymond as well.


    Mister Verdic Evans. You and Brother, what are you both talking about?


    He has a slightly confrontational disposition.


    I apologize about that, Mister Verdic. Raymond, leave the room. The adults need to talk.


    No, Baron, its alright. Hell need to hold fast to that masculine aspect of his, too.


    Witnessing how that man continued to speak of him without care for his presence here, Raymond stood up. Because the baron clenched his hands into fists.


    When Raymond rose to his feet, he saw Verdics greasy hair. And he finally figured out why he thought he had seen him before, when in fact, they had never met before this day.


    This man looked very much like an ordinary nobleman. As though desperately dressing himself up as one.


    Verdic left their residence only after a long time had passed. And as soon as that man left, Raymond quickly knocked on the door of the barons office. His fear of the baron was set aside for the curiosity he was feeling now.


    More importantly, they had been talking about him.


    Marriage? <i>Me?</i>


    I also got engaged when I was around your age. Even though that engagement got broken off because of my depreciated value. Isnt it nice, Raymond? Youre going to be a rich familys son-inw now. You might not be aware because youre still young, but the Evans family is extremely well off. Good for you.

 Chapter 105

    Chapter 105


    Inside the office, Raymond sat down in a chair and held back a groan. This had be something he usually did now.


    Dont tell me. With the situation were in right now, are you going to say that you want to live your own life?


    Even when it came to households that hadnt fallen to ruin, there were many men and women out there who had to marry each other ording to each others terms. The two brothers parents also decided to marry each other as they were introduced by their families.


    Raymonds marriage was decided upon much earlier than he thought itd be, but this wasmonce. Its not something to despair about.


    Its fine.


    Its alright.


    Of course not.


    Thats right.


    Yes, it wasmon. But the baron needed to exin. Just how much was he worth.


    How much is there to receive?


    Thats not something you should be curious about.


    Im just asking how much my body is worth. How much did you sell me for? How much did you receive for selling me to a girl who I dont knowa girl who Id make children with and give our surname to? Just to maintain your swollen, bloated body, Brother, <i>how much</i> did you get?


    But Raymond pressed down on these words that he could not utter.


    I dont like that man.


    Disliking him is your own emotion, sure, but dont let it show in front of others.


    After the deal had been finalized, the baron looked to be quite at easefor the first time after a long time. So, Raymond felt more pressured. As he had an expression that seemed to say that his stomach was fully satiated, just how much did he receive?


    He looked at me like he was choosing livestock.


    And right now, it seemed like his brother was looking at a defective product.


    Listening to Raymond, the baron waved one hand inconsequentially. Like waving away a fly.


    Nonsense. The important thing is that he decided to buy most of our estate.


    What? Raymond stared at the baron with his eyes growing wider with bewilderment. Meanwhile, the baron looked back at Raymond, staring him straight in the eye. One of his cheeks twitched.


    But why did you sell it? You didnt consult No. I know that you dont have to consult me, but. Still, Brother. Thend has been continuously deteriorating. Why all of a sudden?


    As Raymond spoke, it felt like his throat was closing up. He was being married off and theirnd was sold, while his brother was drinking every night and no longer went to church. His brother did not care about their territory anymore. Why. If its like that, then just stay still, as you already are.


    Ournds condition is getting worse and worse now. That person is buying thend at the price hes giving now, so of course it has to be sold. Its even been decided that the price will be doubled. I have to sell it before he finds out.


    What was his brother talking about? Raymond tried to process what he heard just now, then he looked up.


    So, Mister Verdic doesnt know the illnesses we have in the territory right now?


    Yes.


    Thats not fair. Its not good to hide anything while selling something. Thats the basis of any business transaction.


    Raymond heard what the baron said just now loud and clear. But it just sounded so petty and cowardly.


    I got it.


    What?


    I have to tell Mister Verdic. This is fraud.


    Sit back down.


    No.


    Sit back down, Raymond!


    A thick hand shot out to Raymond. The baron grabbed at the end of Raymonds hair. However, that was all. The barons hands were too thick and Raymond was too fast. Some of the childs golden hair was pulled out. Even so, Raymond kicked the door open.


    Stop right there!


    He ran. He ran and ran. Raymond realized anew that he was tall. His joints started hurting not only because the baron beat him.


    Raymond yelled as he ran.


    James! Xenon! Anyone, listen to me!


    Anyone who listens to him will die!


    Raymond ran.


    The baron couldnt stop him.


    It sounded like there was a <i>thump</i> behind him, but it didnt matter. Raymond ran to the entrance of the mansion. A horse was standing there. Raymond jumped and mounted the horse. He didnt need a step stool to do so. He clicked his tongue and kicked the stirrups tounch the horse forward. It was raining outside.


    Embarrassing. <i>Embarrassing.</i> Everything was embarrassing and painful.


    He was ashamed of the baron, and he was ashamed of himself. Was the way that the barons body changed a minor thing? If his body was alright, would the baron be the one sent off instead of Raymond? In the past, if their father was still alive, would the same fraud bemitted?


    Verdic Evans!


    Raymond urged the horse to gallop. The rain kept the fancy carriage from going too far away. The coachman turned his head and saw Raymond, and so, the carriage stopped. Raymond led the horse near the carriage. The carriage window opened. From inside, Verdic stuck his head out.


    Goodness, its raining, but whats going on The baron will tell you all you need to know.


    Raymond swept away his soaked bangs. His vision was blurry.


    Please cancel the contract.


    Hmm.


    A strange sound came from inside the carriage. Raymond went closer.


    There is an epidemic among the sheep in our territory. My brother didnt know about it.


    Even if he had no money, even if he lost his family, even if he were to lose his health, and even in spite of rebuke.


    Raymond did not want to lose his conscience. It hadnt been long since his parents, who taught him this, had passed away, and Raymond was young. Above all, he was just that kind of person.


    Raymond thought that he might cry amidst this downpour, too. But he felt relieved. It wouldnt be obvious if he did cry. And the offended merchant wouldnt notice.


    I apologize.


    He didnt need to live a shameful life now. As long as he would adhere to his morals, then it would be just like the time when his mother and father were still here in this world with him.


    My word


    Verdic stroked his chin. A little girls small head popped out the window as well. Was that his daughter? Raymond was taken aback. This kid was obviously younger than him, and he even wondered if she could even already read.


    So you mean that the Baron deceived me.


    Raymond dropped his head. He couldnt keep his head held high at all.


    Verdic didnt say anything for a while. No, it wasnt that he didnt say anything. He was consoling the little girl next to him. After that, he spoke to Raymond again.


    Very well. Then, youll have to pay for deceiving us.


    But I dont wish to cancel the engagement.


    Raymond returned. Xenon was standing at the corner of the street, and he told Raymond that it would be better to stay at his house until the barons anger had abated. And so, Raymond did not know how the contract between the baron and Verdic had been decided. Even if the subject of that contract was his own life.


    Soon after, Raymond received an admission letter from a military academy. Verdic rmended that he went. What Raymond wanted to do was not an important factor here.


    The moment Raymond showed his face to Ise Evans while she was in that carriagehis fate was sealed.


    Because this was what Ise Evans told Verdic Evans.


    Hes like a knight. He''s gonna look good in a military uniform.


    It was for this reason that Raymond donned a military uniform.


    * * *


    Its fine.


    Brother is sick.


    Thats why Raymond did not resent Baron Saytes. Whats the use in loathing a sick person? And its just the two of them now, isn''t it?


    A sick person had a way to make it turn out like this.


    A sick person could do that.


    * * *


    Life at the military academy suited Raymond better than he thought. Truthfully, he had no other such opportunities, so he couldntpare this experience to anything else. Still, he was well distinguished here, and he could say that he fit well in this ce.


    Though he had the pessimistic notion that this was not his choice, that sentiment quickly disappeared. There were so many other students in this military academy that mirrored his own situation. What Raymond was facing right now was not so different.


    Its as if he was born to move his body. He was serious about his studies, and he had the looks to back him up, too. Thats why there were many ces that called for Raymond. Whatever chance he was given, Raymond was objectively decent at what he did. And its impossible that Raymond himself did not know this.


    I was told that Verdic Evans is your father-inw?


    Who said that.


    Everyone did, Zion replied pompously.


    Then is there a need for you to inform me of that fact?


    Isnt it better that you know?


    Whats the point of hearing about that. Theres nothing special about it.


    Zion chuckled.


    Of course its better that you know. Since youve imed the top spot for three consecutive years, theres a lot of people who are jealous of you.


    I just need to do well.


    Raymond patted Zion on the shoulder once and ignored what he said. He was too busy to care about any jealousy flung at him by the other students. Its impossible to take the top spot without studying. Its impossible for ones body to be trained without moving it. Effort was something that anyone could muster. So, Raymond worked hard and exerted himself.

 Chapter 106

    Chapter 106


    How very admirable. I feel like Im going to cry.


    Zion. Shut up, will you.


    Gotcha.


    But Zion kept his mouth shut for only a moment. He spoke again.


    By the way, Senior[1].


    Zion, lets have a duel. Tomorrow at lunchtime.


    While twirling a pen in one hand, Raymond red at Zion. And at the end of that gaze, Zion panicked.


    Wait a minute. Ah, seriously, hold your horses. Theres a reason I brought it up. Marquis Penceir is hosting another gathering, but are you really not going? People are talking about it a lot.


    Marquis Penceir was one of the academys directors. And he also supported many students with schrships. Raymond was the top student, so it wouldnt look good if he wouldnt go.


    Still though, Raymond shook his head.


    Mister Verdic called me back this time, too.


    Youre being led by the nose, seriously. Led by the nose. Your life is messed up.


    Zion clicked his tongue twice. Raymond frowned, but Zion waved one finger.


    You know how I grew up with very little, right? Thats why Im perceptive, cause Id usually need to find a corner and fit in there. But you youre so inflexible about the most useless things, Senior. Just ignore him, cmon.


    Youre not the one wholl face the repercussions.


    As though thinking that Raymond was being uptight, Zion snorted.


    Is your debt gonna go up just because youre a day or twote? Just give him a hint to end it. If you catch yourself an 80-year-old nobledy straight-up, what can that guy do?


    Is that your future wish?


    Despite Raymonds scathing gaze, Zion puffed up his chest and proudly replied.


    Dont trample on another mans serious dream. Id rather nab myself a wrinkled olddy rather than live like you.


    After proiming his ambition of bing a gold digger, Zion went back to the original topic at hand, casually ignoring Raymonds re.


    Why do you think Verdic is calling you on the same day as the schrship gathering? He does it every time. Its obvious that hes trying to stop you from building new connections, Senior. He doesnt want what he caught to slip out of his grasp. With him being a loan shark through and through, he wouldnt let you. Hes just trying to get more money out of the deal.


    Zion.


    The likes of us need to find a way to live, too.


    Zion gave Raymond a serious look.


    Then, Raymond patted Zion on the head.


    What are you getting in return for bringing me to the gathering?


    Next semesters dorm fees. I stand firm by what I said, though. Honestly, you need to open up more paths so you find more ways to live. Thats what everyone does, but why are you still so loyal to that loan shark?


    Raymond knew that he couldnt possibly just study forever. He was aware of how much he was in the spotlight, but he didnt expect that others would try to connect with him to this extent.


    He shoved his book into his bag.


    So are you going?


    Yeah. Ill go just to shut you up.


    He wasnt very pleased to be influenced by Zions insistence. And Zion wasnt as perceptive as he thought he was. Everything he said here were facts that even Raymond already knew.


    Even so.


    Was it just because its annoying to me?


    It was difficult for him to act in defiance against Verdic due to his position. He was the familys second son, he was just a student, and he was young and inexperienced.


    There was a difference between having an inkling of it by yourself, and realizing that others could see it, too. Experiencing thetter jabbed at his pride a bit more.


    That night, Raymond tore up the train ticket to Verdic Evans mansion. It was a capricious and reckless act.


    * * *


    Congrattions. You got your dormitory fees.


    Thank you, Senior. As expected, the full dress uniform suits you a heck ton.


    Raymond entered the hall where students, who were simrly in full dress, stood. He could feel familiar gazes on him. Rather than the gazes of fellow soldiers, it felt like he was receiving the gazes of women from high society. Actually, the feeling was not very different.


    Did Verdic Evans say anything?


    I took care of it.


    When he tried to write to Verdic, he was going to say that he was feeling under the weather. But instead, he just wrote nothing. Any excuse would just be a lie, and Verdic seemed to catch on quick with those.


    Zion, you seeded, huh.


    Yes, sir. I, the darling of the upperssmen, has seeded.


    Albert hit Zion on the shoulder and chuckled. Then, he shook Raymonds hand.


    So it was you?


    I just love you so much that I had to make an effort. I mean, rather than staying alone, its better that youre here.


    I regrly go to student gatherings.


    Those are nothing though Ah, Marquis, this is my ssmate, Raymond Saytes. Its the third consecutive year that hes taken the top spot in ss, so you could say that hes the darling of the professors.


    It was a sudden introduction, but Raymond turned around reflexively and reached out for a handshake with the man standing there.


    I am Raymond Saytes.


    I finally get to see your face. I didnt expect you toe. I finally get to see you this year, star underssman[2].


    Next to him, Albert quipped.


    I made sure to persuade this friend of mine very well.


    With Albert so keen on showing off Raymonds skills here, Raymond decided to deal with himter. He faced the marquis.


    Its an honor to meet you, Marquis. I didnt know that you were an alumnus.


    I am, yes. I spent my days here, back when I was still young and childish. I hope youre having a good time here as well. Young Lord Albert, youre a lot more sociable than I thought.


    Thank you.


    Albert quickly bowed in response.


    I knew that Verdic didnt want you toe here.


    Marquis Penceir looked to be on the young side despite holding the title of academy director. Moreover, he directly mentioned the reason Raymond hadnt attended the regr gatherings thus far.


    Marquis Penceir became the director one year after Verdic started sponsoring the academy.


    He doesnt know Im here.


    Hell find out eventually.


    If I cant decide this one thing for myself, why should I still keep living?


    Hearing these words, Marquis Penceirughed.


    Right, youve got guts.


    Verdic was incredibly displeased when he found out that Marquis Penceir became the director. Raymond couldnt hide that.


    Verdic sponsored quite a sum to the academy upon Raymonds admission. And after that, he started to grow his weapon business more and more.


    However, Marquis Penceirs territory was located at the borders. He was the lord of thend that was most in need of soldiersthend where conflicts and skirmishes frequently urred.


    But the marquis territory was far away from this military school, which was close to the capital.


    Then, why did he take up the position of academy director?


    Of course, to situate himself at the center. To expand his power and make money.


    Many students thought so. Thats what Verdic thought, too, so he once vented his anger.


    Sure, merchants can work like dogs and earn as much as we want, but when a high noble starts toe forward, we get pushed aside just like that.


    Marquis Penceir then began to involve himself in the arms industry as well, notably the ce where Verdic began to earn significant profits. To Verdic, this was an unbearable intrusion.


    It was only natural that Raymond would be absent from any gathering thats hosted by nobles with ties to the military, like Marquis Penceir.


    I do apologize, but Im afraid Im too young to be a good conversation partner for you, Marquis.


    Its true that youre young, but why is that a cause for concern?


    The marquis grinned. Then, he raised one hand to beckon a servant, and asked for a ss. Raymond took the crystal ss, and the marquis poured wine in it.


    Do I look like Im having such a difficult time that Id ask for help from you when, as you said, youre still young?


    Of course not, Marquis.


    A baron households second son wouldnt be able to offer anything to a marquis. Raymond smiled bitterly. Thats the reason its harder to guess why he was called to this ce. The only other reason that came to his mind right away was Verdic Evans.


    Its because of Verdic Evans, yes, the marquis said.


    I see.


    Youre very calm, too, arent you.


    Im young and I dont know much about the world, so I just keep my ears open and listen to the advice Im given.


    Yes. And I hate that guy.


    At the abrupt deration of disapproval, Raymond looked away and answered.


    I see.


    At the end of the day, Raymond still stood at Verdics side. Regardless of what he thought of the man.


    <i><a> sunbae (or senpai, if you will) = upperssman or senior. </i>


    <i><a> hoobae (or kouhai) = underssman or junior When Marquis Penceir called Raymond a star underssman = [star] because Raymond is the top student, and [underssman] because the marquis is also a graduate of the same academy; hes not currently a student but an alumnus </i>

 Chapter 107

    Chapter 107


    Thinking that Raymonds clipped answer was funny, the marquisughed.


    That doesnt mean I dont like you though. You dont have to be so wary. I loathe how a mere peddler dares to sneak into the sacred Assembly Hall. Hes nothing but a blood-sucking insect that deliberately incites conflict.


    Thats a harsh assessment, Marquis. And Im even more curious why youve called me here.


    I want to give you a better option. Its to express my sympathies after the tragedy that befell Baron Saytes.


    Youre acquainted with my brother?


    Somewhat.


    Its my first time hearing this.


    The marquis set down his cup and waved his hand. The music around them resonated louder.


    Actually, were not very close. But the thing is, I dont quite like Verdic Evans. Thats all.


    I see.


    Cautious until the end, hm? I understand that you dont want to make enemies, but staying that way would make it hard for you to make friends, too. You should think about my suggestion, even just once.


    And, the marquis beckoned another student right after that.


    He was done talking to Raymond.


    Later, when Raymond was about to leave, an attendant handed him a bottle of wine.


    Inside that bottle were documents containing information about Verdic Evans. A lot of it.


    * * *


    Lord Raymond, its been a while.


    Whos this?


    Raymond had to scan through his memories for a moment before he finally recognized the young woman in front of him.


    Ah, right. Fiance. Verdic Evans daughter. Met all but three times in thest five years.


    Father told me to pick you up because you didnte, Lord Raymond.


    This young woman was almostpletely buried in her fancy clothes. She raised her head with a haughty air to her, but for the tall Raymond, all he could see was a childs mimicry of an adult. And really, Raymond didnt even look at her properly. Because he was looking at something else.


    The letter that Marquis Penceir had sent to him.


    I see. You didnt have to.


    But what has caused you to bete?


    <i>Its because your father is a viin.</i>


    However, Raymond could not utter these words.


    * * *


    After that, Raymonds daily life was not all that different. However there was one small changehe became more earnest in his efforts. He had no time to waste.


    His anger against Verdic was not anything trivial. It wasnt the kind of anger that would be resolved after just stabbing Verdic with a dagger or shooting a bullet into his head.


    Father will help you with everything.


    Raymond was well aware.


    So please dont do this again.


    From the very start, if Raymond were to stay quiet and obedient, Verdic would let him eat the finest hay no matter what. He was the new masterthe de facto masterof the Saytes Barony, and this fact was evident in how fast thend was being developed every year.


    All you could see in the estate before were pastures and meadows, but soon, mines and factories reced them. Railroads were likewise built, and the poption increased.


    This all would be Raymonds once again after he marries Ise. On the one hand, it might be better to put aside any thoughts of revenge and focus on taking everything that he could from Verdic.


    But I dont want to live like that.


    He did not want to live like livestock thats being reared by Verdic. If Raymond would let himself be so consumed by anger that hed lose his way, he knew very well that he would not get anything in the end. Raymond had something to lose, and likewise, Verdic was the same. Throwing punches would do nothing in a fight like this.


    What Raymond wanted was the fall of the entire Evans family.


    And this wish benefited Marquis Penceir quite a bit.


    No, no. Dont decide just yet. You shouldnt give the impression that youre calcting the pros and cons of a rtionship. Look nave, but also honest.


    Wouldnt that make me seem foolish?


    With Raymond being head and shoulders, in terms of physique and grades, above other young men who were full of vitality, Raymond didnt really understand the marquis advice. However, the older man just shook his head.


    Youre still young, so its fine. Theres a difference between being seen as a joke and being seen as a show off. Its natural for a young man to be foolish. Never show off. If the other person has even a small semnce of wit, theyd be able to see through it. Its not worth showing off.


    Alright.


    But of course, you shouldnt look docile. Its over the moment others get the impression that youre subservient. Its a good thing that youre poised and have good looks.


    Thank you.


    Raymond found this fact somewhat humorous. If he instead wasnt handsome, Verdic wouldnt have bought him. There were many terms to get it, but that man just wanted to give his daughter a nice stallion. What would have happened if, instead of his older brother, Raymond was the one who had gotten sick?


    <i>ck.</i>


    Apologies.


    Speak half a beat slower. You speak a little too fast.


    Yes.


    The lesson he was having right now was somewhat like what young nobledies would have before their debut into high society. Raymond felt a bit suffocated by this.


    This and that might not be very different from each other. But this wasnt that difficult. Raymond also felt a small sense of aplishment while he was developing his conduct through etiquette.


    And dont ever go down from the top spot. Not for the sake of Verdics business, but for the sake of intellectual endeavor. Duke Dalton is actually quite the intellectual snob, but if a young man like you strikes a conversation with him, he would talk your ear off. And additionally, if people think that youre kind, that would be better.


    Did the marquis also feel some sense of satisfaction whenever hes throwing a bone at Raymond like this?


    However, Raymond couldnt ask that. Instead, the marquis saw Raymonds sidelong nce, and he asked the younger man.


    Why do you think Im fond of you?


    Raymond was curious about that as well. Was it because the marquis wanted to take Verdic down through Raymond? But why did he have to use such a roundabout method of doing so. Was it more worth it if it was through him? Because of his value as a stallion? But the marquis did not have a daughter to give him to.


    Raymond gave up on thinking about this. Its not the time to calcte, but to receive.


    I am not sure. But I dont want to disappoint you, Marquis.


    What a fine student.


    At Raymonds reply, the marquisughed and hit him on the shoulder.


    Ill tell you something important. You have to keep your purpose. It will be your strongest weapon.


    In the age of telegrams, Raymond did not know that carrier birds were still so widely used. Invitations and rmendations came and went in this way, avoiding Verdics eyes. Raymond began to find a way to live without having to rely on Verdic.


    People are still too zealous about values of the days gone past. More people have entered the House of Representatives, and Verdic has more wealth to his namepared to a respectable Count. But tell me, why do you think hes trying so hard to be a nobleman?


    Raymond thought, was it now because most rich people turn out to be aristocrats anyway?


    If you have money, then the next thing youll want is honor and history.


    Im not so sure, Marquis. Just because you want honor doesnt mean youll get it.


    Again, the marquis shook his head.


    No, Raymond. Honor is manufactured<i>.</i> You know well enough how peopleso to speak, the <i>righteous</i> oneshave saved and developed the country, yet fell to ruin without stamping their names into history books. No one remembers who invented scissors.


    But you cant create something out of nothing.


    Right, but you see, Verdic bought <i>you</i> to get the honor he so craves.


    I have no honor.


    Raymond knew himself. All he had right now were his grades, and something like that was relevant only inside the academy. Apart from that, his looks, but that was all. His household had fallen, and the debts his family had incurred with Verdic were sky high.


    Youre insulting your ancestors right now. All the first household heads of the kingdom have received their estates and peerages through great effort. So, how could you not hold any glory and history? All the Evans family has is notoriety.


    My mistake.


    Its not good to apologize too often.


    Yes, sir.


    No, just stay quiet and say nothing. But when you need to find the right time to apologize at the end. Good grief. I cant believe I have to teach you even something like this. No, no, dont apologize. Do itter.


    Raymond closed his mouth.


    Then, the marquis pointed towards the portraits behind him, hanging on one wall of the room.


    What Verdic Evans wants is history. Right, to put it simply, honor is not something like a piece of jewelry that could be bought. But what he wants is power. A stable foundation. You know that the Evans family hails from a country beyond the White Mountain Range, correct?


    Yes.


    Thats why their foundation is cash, gold and jewelry. Those things are nothingpared to a solid ground. Byw, they need a foundation that hails from <i>this</i>nd. Its for this reason that marriage is essential for them.

 Chapter 108

    Chapter 108


    Why wont he just do it himself?


    Seeing the direction in which Verdic Evans moved through life, he could be considered as Zions senior. However, Verdic married a fellow merchants daughter and had a child with her.


    The Marquis exined it briefly.


    When Verdic Evans was still a bachelor, his wealth was less than a tenth of what he has now. Perhaps even less.


    I see.


    And regardless of how low House Saytes influence had be, its still ridiculous that a baron household is going to be inws with a family from a foreign country. How impertinent of them. Even now, foreign aristocrats keeping in because of their countrys civil war How dare for a merchant, even.


    The marquis stared at the floor. He seemed to be genuinely offended.


    A foreigner like him is making a fortune in the arms industry recently.


    Marquis Penceir was also financially benefiting from the arms industry and with defense fortification. Raymond felt a sense of shame. He was still only a student. He didnt know that Verdic was trying to make money and gain power in this way. It never even crossed his mind that Verdic might share it.


    Verdic Evans doesnt trust me.


    That doesnt really matter.


    Marquis Penceir fiddled with the handle of his quill.


    He did put you in the military, so who knows. I dont know myself. If it was me, I would have put you in the Assembly. Its quite helpful to learn thew as well. But in any case, he sent you to a military academy, so dont waste the opportunity. Do your best in this ce. You have no choice but to y the cards youre dealt.


    Yes.


    You said before that youd follow whatever I say, right?


    Yes.


    Then be the perfect knight. And what I mean is the kind of hero that kids would go crazy forto the point that everyone would start rooting for you.


    The marquis eyes were, strangely, gleaming. From the outside, it looked like he was just joking, but Raymond could see that the marquis was being serious.


    Just strive to live an honorable life. Thats the most difficult thing to do, but for you, it wont be hard at all.


    <i>And take good care of your face.</i>


    Raymond couldnt say anything back when the marquis added thosest words, passing by his side. But thatst part wasnt going to be difficult. Raymond was lucky in the way that he was born with good looks.


    Whether the marquis was just trying to steal Verdics property, which was Raymond. Whether he just needed another subordinate under hismand. Or whether this was just some kind of game akin to raising a nt for him.


    Whatever it was that the marquis was thinking, Raymond thought it didnt matter.


    Raymond now had a purpose, and it wasnt difficult to do. It was just as the marquis said.


    Living the way he did now, he then went on to receive medals and des. A few high officials despised Raymond, and some of his colleagues were jealous of him, but aside from them, the cheers that he received were much louder.


    And three yearster, Raymond received the title of a knight. The crown princes son met Raymond, looking up at him with twinkling eyes.


    Are you Sir Raymond Saytes? Ive heard a lot about your reputation through Marquis Penceir.


    Raymond stared at Prince Lewis face for a moment. Behind the boy stood Marquis Penceir.


    It was the highest honor.


    The royal familys envy.


    * * *


    Verdic Evans noticed that Raymond was trying to remove the leash that he had fastened on the young man. Raymond kept striving to establish himself thoroughlythrough honor, through ethics, through the acmation of all those around him.


    God damn it That brat.


    Verdic threw an inkwell. He tried to appropriately adorn that brat as a present to his daughter, but all that brat was doing was ungratefully taking everything while trying to run away.


    Verdic Evans called his daughter. As always, Ise Evans appeared the moment her father called her, embellished in clothes that were all bought by her father.


    Its time for you to get married.


    All Raymond Saytes needed was an opportunity to break his engagement.


    He did not need a big opportunity. Thats not what he wanted. He would get close to someone out of necessity, but anything serious would rather just cause problems.


    Anyone would be fine. Raymond was confident that he would be seen as a good husband by any woman. He was a man who would fulfill duties faithfullyas long as it was not the daughter of Verdic Evans.


    But there was one requirement that anyone else would be able to understand. It was perhaps on the same line as the reason that Verdic Evans chose him. Perhaps also the same reason that Ise Evans chose him. A reason that other people wouldnt think was strange.


    He needed a woman who was so beautiful that Ise Evans would not be able topare.


    Will it be alright?


    * * *


    I fell into a novel.


    He did not believe Carynne Hares words, but he was bothered by what she saidthat she died and died and <i>died</i> for one hundred years because she couldnt find true love. In a strange way, she looked as if she was ming him. Carynnes features were already peculiarly precocious, but when she said that, she seemed like a whining child.


    You promised to believe.


    He tried, but an adult wouldnt easily believe what she had said. If he believed her, then he should go to the asylum first. At that moment, Raymond had to stop himself from clicking his tongue. Shes still young.


    If I find true love, then Ill be free from this curse. Ah, please. Can you stop making that face? I know what youre thinking.


    Im trying.


    But her words were too far out there to even say that its a murderers excuse, and there was even a romantic aspect attached to the story. Even while he was six or seven years old, he already knew that he should disregard any story that sounded like nonsense, just like hers.


    Its a bit immature.


    Youre not really trying, are you?


    Carynne red at him, and at this, Raymond raised both hands and answered.


    Because a promise was a promise.


    I am Yes I really am.


    Was she pretending to be crazy to avoid the repercussions of her sins? Raymond nced sideways at Carynne, who was studying some reference materials. Even so, her story was consistent. Even if its all made up, it was too detailed and logical. Was she truly crazy?


    Raymond sighed, wondering if he really was going to just focus on her face and nothing else.


    Seeing Raymonds sullen expression, Carynne spoke in a loud voice.


    I also know how strange it sounds. But please just try.


    Yes.


    The more absurd it was, the more it was difficult to ignore. In any case, Raymond tried to y along with Carynne. Raymond went around auction houses with her to look at old books. They met people and also bought antiques together.


    What am I doing right now, I wonder.


    But surprisingly enough, this was quite fun. Carynne was a good conversation partner and she had various hobbies as well. Raymond was equipped with plentiful general knowledge, so he naturally gravitated towards like-minded people.


    That person has got quite the fastidious temperament, but he seems to like you quite well anyhow.


    Thats because weve already been acquainted before.


    Carynne shrugged as though to say thats not a big deal. As Raymond witnessed the kind of attitude that he himself had to acquire with great difficulty, he felt a little dejected.


    Certainly however, he had no choice but to admit that Carynne was a captivating lunatic. Not just her appearance was attractiveeverything about her was.


    She would often grumble about how he, the Raymond of this iteration, did not love her. He wanted to ignore her words whenever she said that, but it was difficult to ignore. Raymond wondered why he felt that way.


    But he couldnt quite figure it out.


    Was it because he became close to her out of necessity? No. In the first ce, Raymond approached Carynne while suspecting that she was a murderer. It was Carynne who knocked on his door while saying that she needed him.


    In the rtionship that was between them, Raymond was at least meless. Rather, the problem was Carynne. Someone


    No, thats not it. I know I should have secured evidence and just turned her in.


    Raymond approached Carynne out of necessity, and the thought of leaving her alone made him feel guilty. All this was because of his own conscience. It was not because of her.


    Why am I here, doing this?


    Raymond sighed as he scanned through the useless antiques that Carynne kept buying. Before he knew it, an entire room was full of them. Raymond was spending too much time living within the bounds of her delusion.


    At some point, Raymond realized that he was spending too much time with Carynne.


    Those useless hours they spent in social gatherings, watching live performances, walking around auction houses, searching for records of the past and chasing after delusions. It was perhaps the first time in all of Raymonds life that he wasted so much time like that.


    Those days passed by in a blink of an eye.

 Chapter 109

    Chapter 109


    Sir Raymond, thats a letter from the Royal Family, isnt it?


    It was from Crown Prince Gueuze. The moment Raymond saw the letter, he knew that the prince was after him.


    Raymond sat in front of his desk. Then, he wrote a will, saying that he would be bequeathing all of his property to Carynne in the case that hed die. The baron was not in the position to receive it.


    And this was the strongest indicationthe indication that Raymond was trying. For her.


    Ah, seriously. Youre not going to die!


    Raymond did not believe that.


    She spoke those words so casually and optimistically in a way that only a person, who didnt know the gravity of the situation, would. Carynne did not know about the fight between the crown prince and the crown princes son, about the tensions between Raymond himself, the marquis and Verdic, nor about the conflicts between so many countless people and businesses and offspring battling for the position of heir.


    In the end, she was just saying that. He didnt have a reason to believe those words. She didnt know what was truly going on. She didnt know the situation. And Raymond did not try to reason with Carynne anymore.


    Because Raymond was tired, too.


    And rather, it was quite fun to watch Carynne wander around, diving straight into legends and myths while trying to dig up peoples rtionships. Raymond thought that it was quite alright to leave his fortune with her as the price of being able to have fun together with her.


    And.


    <i>And.</i>


    After going back to the same familiar work hed been doing before, Raymond found himself more and more fond of the days he spent doing nothingthe days he thought were useless. It had been so very long since he had drifted away from the luxury of having fun.


    Did Verdic Evans betray me?


    The moment he shot a bullet into Duke Luthes head, and back when Raymond killed the dukes young granddaughter.


    Rather than feeling any guilt at all from killing two people, Raymond just kept thinking that he wanted to finish his job quickly and go back.


    Where exactly did he want to go back to?


    Raymond realized what the answer was, and realized that he was serious about it. And at that moment, he knew.


    Raymond lived honorably.


    Until this day.


    That was the easiest way for him to live. If he were to see any injustices, then he would resist them. He did not keep silent. And he acted for the sake of justice.


    However, he could not kill Carynne Hare.


    Raymond had watched Carynne. If she had acted in a way that showed violence or cruelty right in front of his eyes, he would not have hesitated. He would not even have had to think about it.


    And yet, she never showed anything like that in front of Raymond.


    I love Sir Raymond.


    It was clear that even she herself did not believe her own words. As soon as Raymond had barged into the crown princes room, her tearful eyes had changed into a look of annoyance. Nheless, she was a victim. Always. Always.


    Raymond realized that he could not bring himself to kill Carynne.


    Against the values that he built up, against the honor and conscience that he had fostered, shed be more important.


    An emotion like this Raymond couldnt at all say that this <i>wasnt</i> love.


    He didnt think about it anymore. There wasnt enough time, and Raymond had to find a way. Whatever it was that he thought of Carynneregardless of how fanciful her words were, regardless of how he couldnt erase the conviction that she might have been involved in murderous acts


    It did not matter any longer. Because he was going to help her.


    Raymond stared at the priest in front of himthe young priest named Dun Roid. Raymond thought about the first time he met the priest. The emotion between Dun and Carynne seemed to be more like hate rather than love. Back then, Raymond held a hint of sympathy for the other man, but that was all. Through Verdic Evans, Dun had tortured Carynne just because she broke off their engagement.


    He was a normal, wily, jealous man.


    Raymond did not hold any sympathy for him anymore. Because Dun was his rival. In spite of everything that he did, wasnt he now saying that he was willing to go to jail on behalf of Carynne Hare?


    Reverend Dun.


    Raymond Saytes looked down at the man in front of him. He stared at Dun Roid. From outside, the sacred hymns continued to echo, and the priestthis envoy of Godhad copsed before him, afraid that Raymond would send Carynne to prison.


    Faced with this sight, Raymond was filled with displeasure. What exactly was this feeling, he wondered.


    Do you love Carynne Hare?


    No.


    But that answer was not convincing.


    Why do you wish to protect Carynne Hare so much?


    Because I-I am her doctor, and I am a priest.


    So its for that reason that you want to go to prison instead of her. Dont you think that what youre saying makes little sense?


    Theres only one name to this emotion, wasnt there?


    Witnessing that fact, Raymond felt a slight twinge of jealousy. And, he was a little surprised.


    Truthfully, beforeing here, a fleeting thought passed Raymonds mind: If Dun loved Carynne, and if thats the reason he was trying to protect her.


    Then if Raymond were to die, he thought that the other man would be of help to her.


    However, right now, Raymond wanted to bar Dun from getting involved with Carynne for any reason at all. Even though he knew that this should not be the case.


    If Dun loved Carynne, then Raymond should take advantage of this more.


    It seems to me that you love Carynne Hare.


    I-I do not.


    If not, then do you pity her?


    Raymond hoped that it was pity and pity alone.


    But then, Raymond was not blind to the muddied look in Duns eyes, nor to the helping hand that he was offering to Carynne. There was too much emotion evident in the priest.


    Just thinking about the assumption that Dun loved Carynne was so very unpleasant.


    And, experiencing this feeling of jealousy for the first time in his life, Raymond felt embarrassed. Disconcerted.


    Raymond made an offer to Dun. Who was perhaps his rival.


    Because he could help.


    Because, for the sake of not anymore thinking about killing or hating Carynne Hare, Dun would give Raymond the answer.


    Has Carynne Hare gone crazy? Is that why youre helping her?


    S-Sir Raymond?


    Raymond raised Dun from where he was. With a firm grip on the other mans arms. And, he looked straight into his eyes.


    He needed to get a definite answer from him, even if he had to use coercive means. Dun <i>must</i> give Raymond an answer.


    Is that the reason why you said that Carynne is not guilty of any sins?


    <i>Say yes.</i>


    Raymond yelled this in his mind.


    <i>Say shes not guilty. Say thats the reason.</i>


    Dun nodded.


    As a doctor, as a priest.


    And it looked as if Raymond had been saved by this fact. The hymns continued to echo in the distance.


    * * *


    Raymond walked down the corridor. It was a littleter in the morning. Brilliant rays of sunlight were streaming through the hallways windows. <i>Bless you. </i>His steps were light.


    Raymond was fond of this mansion, where so few people stayed. Since this wasnt a property of House Saytes, it was a transient ce where they could only stay for a little while, but there was also a sense of peace that came from that fact.


    Soon enough, he would go back to his house. Along with the woman who Raymondand only Raymondchose.


    Donna?


    There was no one else but Raymond and Carynne in this temporary home. He felt a little relieved that the maid wasnt here. Right now, it was satisfactory that only Carynne alone was here. Because he felt embarrassed, somewhat.


    Hm.


    Raymond nced down at the hydrangeas in his hands. These white and blue summer flowers. It was around the time for the kinds of flowers to change. Summer was ending. Being that Carynne had red hair, her bedroom looked better when there were white and blue flowers to contrast that color.


    After summer has passed, what kinds of flowers should he choose?


    Maybe it would have been better to just get jewelry rather than flowers.


    Raymond contemted over the flowers. He chose this gift after appropriately giving alms to the street children he bought these from, but whenever he would give her flowers, she would just thank him and receive them. And it was the same with jewelryshe would just thank him and wear them.


    She smiled and thanked him for everything, but she gave no significant reaction to anything. He wanted to surprise her, but she was also good at gambling, so she didnt care about money or anything that could be bought with it. It was those peculiar antiques that attracted her attention.


    Raymond knew it himself, that it was going too fast, but he did not want to wait.


    Ah, still. This shouldnt be it.


    But after thinking about it, Raymond just went ahead with the bouquet of hydrangeas that he usually bought. He didnt even want to wait until the shops were open. Thats why Raymond just bought the hydrangeas. One sce here was that the flowers were at least in good condition.


    <i>Knock, knock.</i>


    Raymond knocked on Carynnes door. There was no answer. Raymond wondered if its because it was still too early. The polite thing to do here was to retreat.


    Mmh.


    But even more than before, he wanted to open the door. Anyone could see that this was a childish and quite disrespectful impulse. Raymond happily epted the slight self-degradation he directed at himself.


    <i>Creak.</i>


    The door was opened.


    And there she was. Carynne wasying on her bed. As expected, she hadnt gotten up yet. She hated waking up early in the morning. Raymond constantly tried to make her a morning person ording to the saying that a healthy body begets a healthy mind, but any attempts in pursuing that was a failure.


    Again, after confirming that Carynne was still asleep, the only polite thing to do here was to leave.


    Raymond stared at Carynnes closed eyes. She looked like a doll. She had an amazingly pretty face.


    Is she dead?


    Raymond had that thought for a moment. Thats how unreal this was for him.

 Chapter 110

    Chapter 110


    When Raymond first met her, he thought that she was older than him. She didnt seem like she was just seventeen years old. Still, he couldnt bring himself to say that to her. She didnt look her age. In fact, there were times when he thought that she didnt even look human. Raymond was ustomed to beauty, but Carynnes face and appearance sometimes seemed to transcend. Like stone, perhaps, or water. (Or like a corpse.)


    But Carynne was alive. Evidence enough was how her chest was slowly rising and falling. She was breathing.


    Right before Raymonds eyes.


    Raymond ced the hydrangeas next to her face. He brought her bouquets every day, and now her room was full of them. It was almost as if Carynne was buried in flowers. Like a tomb of flowers.


    Carynne.


    There was plenty of time. The duke and the marquis. The members of the Assembly and the members of the House of Representatives. The majority voted for the abdication of Crown Prince Gueuze. The next king of this country would be Lewis. Crown Prince Gueuze would no longer be able to send Raymond to his death. And next week, Raymond would be a member of the Assembly.


    How long are you going to sleep? Please wake up.


    Carynne might have killed someone.


    But that did not matter either.


    Raymond nced at Carynne from the side slowly. If Carynne were to show any violent tendencies, or if she would ever kill anyoneRaymond was sure that hed be able to point a gun at her head at all costs. It had been like that. But now? There was no need for that.


    Carynne had never shown any sign of a violent disposition while she was next to him. She had always, <i>always, </i>been the victim.


    What would the situation now be if she had ever shown that kind of behavior? Perhaps she was just faking it while she was in front of Raymond because he was much stronger in the physical sense. Even so, she did not have even one single attempt at killing Raymond, and she had never been violent towards the maids or any children, much less the children passing by.


    Wake up,e on.


    One more hour.


    Marry me, please.


    What would she say? She was the girl who asked him to love her. Would she be surprised? Would she be happy? Would she cry?


    But it was none of those things. Carynne threw a pillow. Right into Raymonds face. Of course, Raymond caught the pillow in the air. But this just made Carynne angrier, and so she eximed.


    Wanna die?


    Ill die in about one hundred years.


    He didnt expect this. But even as it was, its good. He would have liked whatever Carynne answered. Because he already made up his mind.


    Right now, youreing up to someone whos sleeping with a joke thats not even funny Get out and go die.


    Im a bit sad that you dont find it enjoyable, but Im being sincere.


    You are? Uh Um, I mean, wait a second. Really?


    Yes.


    Carynne ducked down her head. She looked like she was just thinking of going back to sleep, but she slowly turned to the side and said that. She still seemed tired, but it didnt look like she was put out.


    Tell me againter after Im done putting on makeup. After five hours. And bring a ring.


    Cant I hear your answer first?


    Die. Just


    Then Carynne buried her head into her pillow. It was only after a while that a small voice came out again.


    Sir Raymond. Am I the one whos crazy, or is it you?


    Im crazy about love.


    Thats seriously some.


    If he was crazy about love, then what was Carynne crazy about? What was she shackled to? But one things for sureCarynne was <i>crazy.</i> It wasnt in a figurative sense that someone like Raymond or someone like Verdic would cling so crazily onto honor, revenge, money, secr values or dignity. What she had was something more natural. Like an illness.


    Just as you said, Sir R-Raymond Carynne is crazy. Thats something that even I-I can g-guarantee.


    Carynne was just sicklike Raymonds older brother. Didnt the doctor, the priest tell him so?


    Raymond felt a great sense of relief once he received this confirmation.


    Carynne was insane.


    But that would not be a big problem between them.


    Raymond felt more at ease, now that he admitted that Carynne was a psychopath.


    Carynne was just sick. She was a mentally ill patient. Sick people sometimes acted in ways that were iprehensible. When disying such behavior, the patients family should be understanding as they take care of the patient.


    I want to spend the rest of my life with you.


    Well Alright. Thats fine by me. Even if you dont have a ring, Ill let you off.


    Hearing Carynnes answer, Raymondughed.


    Its an honor.


    Raymond couldnt understand Carynne, and this didnt mean that he approved of her behavior. However, Raymond loves Carynne. And so he decidedif she would do anything unexpected, as her husband, he would stop her, and thats all. Perhaps their bedroom would need bars. But it would still be alright.


    Its fine.


    Raymond stroked Carynnes hair.


    You are sick. And perhaps you really are crazy. But none of that matters. Nothing at all is a problem in the face of love.


    Its alright now. A sick person can act that way.


    Even so, Raymond had no intention to let Carynnes actions pass. It would be too self-indulgent to just let it all go. He would do his duty as her family. He would fulfill his responsibilities. Just as he did towards his older brother. Even if his family was sick, even if they were tomit a sin.


    Carynne was still young. She was only seventeen years old. And she was not all there in the head. But at the age that she was, its still fine. Raymond had seen numerous other people who had gone mad on the battlefield. Standing by her side as her husband, her level of madness was tolerable to him. As time passed by, the day woulde when the delusions guing her days of youth could be dismissed as nothing but a shameful past.


    It seems as if I truly do love you, Raymond confessed.


    Whether it be feeling the joy of giving to those who were less fortunate, feeling the sense of security while shes amongst people on her side, or feeling the peace that she would feel at home. She would know all of that now. Here, by Raymonds side. Those were the only things he could give her.


    Raymond embraced his new family.


    So Carynnes expression would not be visible to him.


    * * *


    <i>May God bless you.</i>


    Dun was left standing in the main building of the cathedral. Raymond went back. Dun stood in the middle of the corridor, by a pir that he was holding onto. Light streamed through the cathedrals stained-ss windows. The early morning mass had ended, and the churchgoers already returned to their homes. Raymond also returned to Carynne. Raymonds confession was over. No, it was not even a confession. Raymond was not guilty. The one who sinned was not him.


    It was not him who should be condemned for his sins.


    Dun leaned against the wall, one weak, trembling hand supporting him. His eyes were blinded. Dun turned his head towards the wall. There, towards the main hallinside that holy establishment. Dun turned away. There was a sinner here. A duplicitous man. A heretic. A transgressor who could not escape, even if hed try to escape.


    Dun went down on his knees. Rather, instead of intentionally kneeling, he copsed on his knees. His sin was so exceedingly grave that it terrified him. But nevertheless. Nevertheless!


    Dun sped his hands together. His mouth shook. His hands shook. In spite of it all, he would not give up. The valuable thing that he desired was in that ce. That deep, intense desire that God would not allow.


    God Almighty, please have mercy on them.


    God Almighty, please do not bestow mercy upon me.


    For I am a sinner, and I shall burn in hell. I know that I shall.


    Dun confessed his guilt.


    Not a soul was there to listen.

 Chapter 111: 05. The villain

    Chapter 111: 05. The viin


    Marriage.


    Raymond couldnt see Carynnes reaction. Even so, he vaguely imagined that Carynne would react positively. Or, perhaps dazed. But truly, as she was in Raymonds embrace, Carynne was frowning. Because this was too clich. This time again, its like that. Thats all she thought.


    For Carynne, Raymonds marriage proposal was nothing special. So, she felt no excitement. Having been proposed to by the same man dozens upon dozens of times, it was difficult to be filled with admiration with the way things were.


    Im annoyed.


    But this time, she felt quite strange. Carynne herself was a little surprised by her own feelings.


    Why? Ever since the proposals went over the double digits, the only thing left was boredom. But what she felt now was a bit different.


    At first, Raymond looked at Carynne with a cold stare that she had never seen beforebut then, his attitude towards her changed too quickly.


    Had it not been too long ago since he was still silently interrogating her with that suspicionced in the look of his eyes? As expected, theres a problem with Sir Raymond as well.


    Carynne sighed as she noticed the slight excitement in Raymonds voice.


    What in the world was on his mind? But nevertheless, he proposed again in this iteration.


    In this life, Raymond proposed to Carynne, and his decision was sincere. It wasnt just something thats said through words, but there would be a document to prove it.


    This was probably love.


    * * *


    With wide eyes, Lady Lianne gaped at the piles of stationery in front of Carynne.


    Wow


    Haa


    Carynne sighed. Before her was the schedule of the wedding and the list of people to send invitations to. The fact that she couldnt see the end to this made her increasingly annoyed.


    Theres so many. Will all these peoplee?


    I believe so.


    Prince Lewis as well?


    Perhaps.


    Since itse to this.


    I should ask Mother if I can get a fitting for a new dress right away! Carynne, can I be your bridesmaid?


    Id be honored if you could. Still, we have to get Madam Elvas permission first.


    Ill make sure that we get it!


    <i>Dododo. </i>Lady Lianne ran out, her steps resounding. In her haste, her steps became undignified, but she was cheerful the way she was.


    As the child left the room, Donna approached carefully.


    Lady Carynne, arent you happy that youll be getting married? Donna asked.


    Does it show?


    Yes, a little.


    Carynne was losing patience. Even if a child couldnt see it, and adult would definitely notice.


    Lamenting the way her patience was slowly running out, Carynne replied.


    I dont quite know.


    Carynne answered frankly.


    Shes not Raymond. Neither was she Dun. There was no reason to deceive her.


    Donnaforted Carynne by bringing her a cup of hot tea.


    Its probably because its my first time.


    No, its because she had been married one too many times.


    But without saying anything more, Carynne pushed all the papers on the desk to the side andy face down on the surface.


    My head is spinning


    This time, too.


    Carynne struggled with boredom, but at the same time, with the knowledge of whats toe after the wedding. This time, too, he was no different. Its simr in this iteration as well. Again, Raymond proposed to Carynne in a way that she couldnt understand. Yes, she couldnt understand, but that was, perhaps, not what she should be preupied with right now. Its the list in her hands right now that needed to be dealt with.


    Its only because you have much to think about, Mdy. If His Lordship and the Madam were alive, they would have helped you a lot


    Would they?


    Of course. If His Lordship was alive, how much would they have <i>hiic.</i>


    Carynne lifted her teacup and sipped it gratefully. All the while, she was ignoring how Donna sobbed quietly to herself.


    The Madam as well


    If what she was holding right now was a brandy ss, she would have thrown hands while shouting, Goddamnit, Mother! You should have done the responsible thing before leaving! But then, what spilled onto her tongue was tea instead.


    <i>Cough, cough.</i>


    M-Mdy, are you alright?


    Carynne waved one hand, stopping Donna from reaching out to her. She felt a bit embarrassed.


    Yes, it would have been different if Mother was here.


    This task was something parents should do. Carynne recalled the memories of her first time getting married, back when she saw the mountain of work that she was set to do. The oath of marriage was to be done amidst a gathering of numerous peoplesoldiers, nobles, royalty. After that, the rtionship could neither be called a temporary rtionship, nor a snare in which youd be trapped.


    Everythings so annoying


    Carynne did not believe in other peoples vows, just as much as she couldnt believe in her own feelings. She had gotten involved with countless men, but less than a tenth of them had proposed to her. And the men who actually held the ceremony with her and even signed the documents could be counted with two measly fingers. Marriage was a danger to men, too.


    Still, Mdy, arent you happy that youll be marrying Lord Raymond?


    Carynne looked down at the table once more, thinking about the things she had to do. Wedding preparations, which she had to suffer through dozens of times, was nothing but tiresome and annoying. She hung her arm.


    She was well aware. A man like Raymond was extremely rare.


    I know hes a decent man.


    Yes, she knew. No one knew better than Carynne. Objectively speaking, she knew that he was a decent groom. Regardless of his appearance and personality, it would be difficult to find a man as good as him.


    She couldnt remember the plot of the novel all that well anymore, but Carynne made this judgement based on her own memories. Wasnt that why Verdic chose Raymond for his daughter? Even though Raymond did not choose Ise.


    But I dont think Im happy.


    Because time would not flow.


    Nothing woulde to fruition from their marriage. Their emotions would not move forward. First meeting, confession, proposalover and over, until death. Rinse and repeat.


    After two people would be husband and wife, and dere this to society, there was nothing left. Oh, however, this was a fact applicable only to Carynne. Not to others. After that instant, the others would remain. Was this not enough to prove true love? Carynne did not know what would be better to do.


    Marriage had its own risks. It was an oath that held significantly more weightpared to the promise of engagement. Carynne thought of the men who she had gotten married toone of them was Dun.


    Mother must have experienced the same thing before she got married.


    She must not have believed in love. She must not have known who to choose for her to be enveloped by the grace of death.


    Thanks to Carynnes father, she knew that unconditional love was not the answer. But then, why did Dun mention true love? When Raymond proposed to Carynne, could his feelings be quantifiable?


    Fall in love, sincerely.


    In that case.


    I will help you.


    He might surrender once the kiss at the wedding takes ce.


    Or would that not be enough? Carynne twirled a lock of her hair.


    Perhaps, if she were to make a show out of the first night and make him watch, he just might die of a heart attack. Ah, no, it might be a kink of his.


    Lord Dun? Do you still keep in touch with him, Mdy?


    The maid panicked at that moment, but in response, Carynne winked and whispered to her.


    Dont tell Raymond.


    Donnas face turned as pale as a sheet. Entirely shocked, Donna asked.


    What? Really?


    Its a secret.


    And then, Donnas face turned pink when she realized that Carynne was teasing her.


    Carynne then smiled at the maid, but she turned her gaze back to the work thats before her.


    As for the dress, Countess Elva said that shed introduce me to someone, so I can take that off the to-do list


    But Carynne trailed off as she turned away.


    Whats wrong, Mdy?


    Ah, those flowers. Wait.


    Carynne saw the flowers that Donna had raised. It was the bouquet of flowers that Raymond gave her as he roused her earlier this morning. In fact, it was the same kind of flower that he gave her on any other day. They werent any different. If she were to look closer, they might be a little biggerbut just a little.


    Mdy, shall I put these flowers in a vase? Or should I dry them right away?


    Just put them in a vase.


    They didnt matter all that much anyway.


    Which would be faster, for the flowers to wither, or for Carynne to die?


    Do you still feel quite low, Mdy?


    Does it look like that?


    Yes, it looks like youre conflicted.


    Donna replied cautiously.


    Towards her nervous maid, Carynne gave a forced smile. She waved her hand to dismiss the thought.


    Its just that it feels strange to think that Ill soon be married.


    Whether she liked it or not, that day was approaching.

 Chapter 112

    Chapter 112


    Carynne was running out of time in this iteration. She didnt like the middle part, but the conclusion was a marriage proposal.


    And she decided to settle for it. After all, from the very beginning, Raymonds feelings did not matter. What mattered was what Dun thought. Dun himself needed to provide the answer to Carynne.


    She only needed to think about that.


    Its my first time doing all this, so Im very nervous and anxious.


    No. Its not the first time.


    Carynne knew the reason behind her frustration and anxiety. Its exactly because its not the first time, and yet, everything was happening as if it was.


    She stared at the vase that Donna was pouring water into. And the hydrangeas that were put inside it. Then, the flowers that filled the entire room.


    There are so many flowers.


    Isnt it touching?


    Mmh.


    It was annoying to even pretend to be excited. Carynne looked at the flowers. Those countless petals.


    I received flowers back then, too.


    During the first time, Raymond gave her flowers as well.


    So its like that. Carynne now realized why it felt quite peculiar, why she felt a bit upset.


    It was the wedding present that Carynne had received from Raymondduring their real first time. Carynne remembered. Back when Raymond had proposed for the real, true first time he had given her flowers.


    Its just I saw these flowers this morning, and I suddenly couldnt stop myself from wanting to propose to you.


    Carynne hadughed.


    Were already engaged.


    Still, Raymond gazed into Carynnes eyes and replied.


    But I wanted to say it again.


    A long time had passed since then.


    Raymond remained the same. Raymond was not affected by the time she had spent. He did not remember. Hed been the same, and hed always be the same. Even so, Carynne still couldnt figure him out. She did not know Raymond very well. Why was it like that, this time as well.


    I want to hack your stomach open. If I do that, will I know?


    As Carynne stared at the flowers, this thought crossed her mind. Petals were crumpled in Carynnes fist.


    I wonder if you really love me. I dont think theres a difference, then and now. No, perhaps not this time. It couldnt be the same, this time.


    In this iteration, Raymond had looked at Carynne so coldly. But then, his attitude towards her suddenly changed at some point. Just like before, just like how he did in the pasthow he said that he loved Carynne. Again, this time.


    But, howe?


    Carynne was afraid.


    Because she did not know. Because she could not understand.


    If Carynne were to base it on the Raymond she knew, he would not confess his love to Carynne. In her opinion, as his eyes got colder and colder by the day, he would eventually pull out a gun and point it at her. That is, if it was the Raymond she knew.


    Carynne was confused about her own feelings. She felt nervous, but soon, she realized why she felt this way.


    I have no answer either.


    While she demanded to be loved, truly, she wished to be stabbed.


    That seemed to be more fun at least.


    * * *


    Carynne stared nkly into space. This was not the answer. This life was such a mess. But at least, she had been honest with herself.


    She closed one hand into a fist. Fingernails dug into her palm.


    I feel strange. I dont like how Ive been epted. I dont like his sudden change of demeanor. Can I believe in him? Can I believe in Raymond?


    No. Carynne could not.


    However, its not <i>her</i> who would decideit was Dun. Whether this love was correct or not, he was the judge.


    In the first ce, Carynne chased after Raymond in this life because Dun threw that bait. Wasnt that why, instead of acting on her grand dream of bing a serial killer, Carynne went out of the house a lot while going to banquets and events with Raymond? At what point did things start to go wrong?


    But, no, thats not the important thing here. Carynne soothed the wave of disappointment passing through her.


    Yeah. Theres no problem, Carynne murmured.


    The room was empty. The suns radiance was warm. It was the height of summer. It was dazzling. She needed to get up. Right now, there was no time for tranquility. Raymond had proposed to her, so now, she needed to go to Dun because of that.


    Whatever it was that Carynne felt for Raymond, such a thing was not so important.


    Carynne sighed. It would be great if Dun would yield the answer once hed hear that Raymond had proposed to her.


    She would now get a hint from Dun, and so, she would finally be able to die.


    Human emotions were truly trivial. In the tedious series of livesin this maze of eternityshe hade to know just how much a persons feelings could change dozens of times a day, and it was all quite worthless.


    Thats why Ive been feeling peculiar.


    Perhaps shed been getting it all wrong.


    Carynne shook her head.


    This is all because of Sir Raymond.


    Carynne concluded like so.


    Hes the reason she was having a difficult time. Because he gifted her flowers. Because they were the same flowers that he had given her during his first proposal. Because he gave them again.


    A hundred years had passed. Raymond still had not changed.


    Carynne felt her resolve crumbling, but she picked up the pieces.


    Maybe its because I dont love him.


    She confessed as she stared at the portraits before her.


    Perhaps that was so. Perhaps it was her whos to me. Because Carynne did not feel true love, because she did not treat others like people, because she did not feel love and saw love only as a means to an end.


    Carynne, herself, had not loved anyone. For a hundred years.


    So, she thought that perhaps this was the reason she had been repeating the same life over and over again.


    Mother. Mothers mother. Mothers mothers mother. Perhaps they all loved someone else truly, genuinely, and so they escaped the curse. But Carynne did not love anyone, which was why she was stuck in this trap endlessly.


    Then, will it all be over once I love you?


    Carynne muttered under her breath. Still, however, she did not know the answer. This was nothing but a murmur.


    Alone in the room, she looked around the room where flowers were abundant. She suppressed the urge to cry.


    Even so, it will be worth a try.


    It is worth a try.


    There was not much time left. However, Carynne vowed to try harder to love Raymond.


    But that night, Raymond did not return. He left only one letter.


    Isnt this too sudden?


    Carynne stared down at Raymonds hurried letter.


    Whats written was that something hade up all of a sudden, and it seemed as though he might be away for a while.


    It hadnt even been written on a proper stationery paper, but instead it was a memo scribbled upon a knights notepad in a hurry. How could he be called to work like this when he was about to retire?


    Would it be better to postpone the wedding? she asked herself. No, it would be difficult to reschedule it.


    Theres not much time left anyway.


    She did not know exactly when Raymond would return, but she had no doubt that he would return safely again this time. And he would marry her.


    But this


    Carynne stared at the other letter in her hands.


    It was a letter with the royal seal.


    Crown Prince Gueuze had summoned her once again.


    * * *


    His intent with sending this letter was obvious.


    <i>Come to my side. Heat up my bed.</i>


    Carynne let out a sigh. Raymond wasnt here. And Countess Elva wouldnt stick out her neck to protect her. Its too much of a risk to go against the royal family. Only people like Raymond, who believed in justice and listened to conscience, would do crazy things against them. Its for this reason that she chose him.


    However, would Raymond be able to protect her again this time? Right now, things were spiraling out of her control more and more that it was difficult for her to predict where things were going.


    What will happen if I dont go, I wonder.


    The same ordeal was happening again, and for the first time in a long while, Carynne was having a difficult time to decide.


    Raymond was called out to duty, and Carynne was being summoned by Crown Prince Gueuzeagain.


    In the days long past, Carynnes suffering ended at Ises hands. Its only to be expected that a romance novels viin was another woman. The story would be too scandalous if another man would be involved. Itd be dirty.


    Why is Crown Prince Gueuze so obsessed with me.


    Mdy


    Was he soothing his bruised ego through the daughter because he could not conquer the mother?


    Still though, it was only a matter of course that Carynne had no intention of picking up Catherines leftovers. Its not very hygienic, you know. And it wouldnt be good for ones mental health either.

 Chapter 113

    Chapter 113


    If Carynne wouldnt go, how long would Raymond be away on military duty? Raymond said that she wouldnt be directly affected by his retirement from the military and his new post as member of the Assembly. However, the opponent right now was royalty. And, for that matter, the crown prince.


    How far would Raymond be able to defy that man? Even now, Raymond wasnt around Carynne. To what extent would he be able to protect her?


    Will Sir Raymond be safe only if I answer Crown Prince Gueuzes summons?


    Should she?


    He was acting like many other tyrants would. Had Raymond gone to a dangerous ce, just like all the other husbands or fiancs who lost their wives or fiances to powerful men? Then, did this mean that Carynne would need to go to Crown Prince Gueuze in exchange for Raymonds safety? Until he was satisfied? Until hed get bored of her? Until when?


    But Carynne still had to choose.


    In the end, she had to choose one or the other. And if Carynne had to pick, she would choose the side that had more weight behind itthe side that she would <i>have</i> to do.


    However, there were two problems.


    First, it was Crown Prince Gueuze, one of her mothers former suitors. And her mother was a human being who had lived a repetitive life, just like herself. Carynne didnt want to use the same rod that her mother might have used. That would be exceedingly unsanitary. Just thinking about it triggered an instinctive unwillingness.


    Ill have to bear with it.


    In her minds eye, Carynne could imagine that its the same as food waste getting shoved down her throat, but she sighed and tried to persuade herself.


    Considering all the years she lived in this repetitive life, Gueuze was definitely younger than her. Sheforted herself with this thought. Still, there were quite a few things that she loathed, even as she had already lived to this age.


    Then again, therey a much bigger problem than this.


    The second problem was whether this was the kind of love that Dun had in mind.


    There were many stories about women leaving their man for another man. It was such amon story that could be heard anywhere.


    However, Carynne had never once heard a happy ending amid those stories, where the man and the woman were happily married. The best case scenario was that the couple would bury the matter and pretend that it never happened. With Raymond, that didnt seem likely.


    Should Carynne spread her legs in front of Crown Prince Gueuzefor the sake of Raymond?


    Was that love?


    Carynne remained alone in that room, staring at the portraits hanging on the walls. She stared at those women. She stared at her mother.


    If she were to whore herself out in the name of love, was that still love?


    Did you all do that, too?


    Would the priest acknowledge that as true love?


    If she genuinely loves Raymond, should she sleep with another man for his sake?


    If I be that old geezers ything, will that prove my love?


    Its not even funny.


    From the beginning, why did she want to kill people? Did she not take up a knife in her hand for the sheer reason that she didnt want to <i>be</i> killed anymore? Wasnt that why she wanted to live a refreshing new life, even a little?


    Why must she be so pathetically conflicted?


    Why must she have to take this filthy test?


    As chaos filled herpletely, the night fell.


    And, soon, it was morning once more.


    * * *


    Mdy, its time for your meal, but


    Get out.


    Carynney face down.


    I dont want to meet anyone. I dont even want to think about anything. I want to procrastinate as much as I could. I do not want to decide. I do not want to choose. Ill just stay here and wait, and once Raymondes backI will try to love him. Then after that, Ill decide whether Ill go to Crown Prince Gueuze or not. It might be better if we decide on it together because, after all, maybe this is love?


    This letter


    Carynne handed a letter to Donna. There was no recipient written on the envelope. Carynne spoke again.


    Send it to Dun.


    Rather than making the wrong decision by herself, what Carynne decided to do now was to peek into the answer sheet. She did not want to try and analyze this more. If hed say its correct to go, then she would go. If shes told to go, she would, even if she felt disgusted by how unsanitary it would be. But if she was told <i>not</i> to go, what if Raymond would die? Ah well, that would be on Dun.


    Carynne was sick and tired of everything.


    Raymond. Dun. Gueuze. Verdic. Ise.


    Shes tired of them all.


    * * *


    But Raymond did note. Dun did not reply.


    Buried beneath a field of flowers, Carynne counted. One, two, three


    And she thought about the past. What was he like back then? At that time


    * * *


    The night had fallen once more, and the meeting day that Crown Prince Gueuze had set was now here.


    <i>Knock, knock.</i>


    Someone knocked on the door. Donna didnt seem to be here. Carynne covered her ears with a pillow. She was still in her nightgown. She closed her eyes. Really, she did not want to go. She did not want to use what her mother had used.


    Its fine.


    Her time was almost up. A month and a half. Thats when Carynnes wedding would be. And, the day after that, Carynne would either end, or this time would end.


    <i>Knock, knock.</i>


    Her legs would not need to be spread anymore. Her throat would not need to be slit anymore. No, not anymore.


    <i>Knock, knock.</i>


    Leave.


    Receive the order.


    A stranger came in, not Donna. It was a man in civilian clothes. However, his face was ruggish and his arms were thick. This mans entire body screamed he did dirty work.


    Carynne scowled.


    I said leave.


    Crown Prince Gueuze has issued an order to bring you to him.


    Tell him Im not here.


    I cannot lie to His Highness.


    Im about to get married, so why are you doing this?


    I follow the will of only Crown Prince Gueuze. And His Highness wants to talk to you.


    The man grabbed Carynnes wrist, and so she was forced to stand up from the bed.


    She shouted towards the door.


    Donna!


    Tell Countess Elva!


    This was a terrible abuse of power. Regardless of how incapable Crown Prince Gueuze was with picking up women, he couldnt just take a woman living in a counts residence like this, let alone the fiance of a baronys representative.


    Let go of me. Are you nning on dragging me out like an animal like this?


    Im just following orders. Carynne Evans, stood up and heed His Highness order. He wishes to meet you.


    DONNA!


    But there was no answer. The maid wasnt here.


    Since when had she been gone?


    Carynne regretted keeping only a few people around her. At the very least, Countess Elva should know. Or perhaps Lianne. She couldnt get dragged away without anyone knowing about it. Even if she was to be silenced here, there should at least be one person whod be able to witness this.


    But why was there no one here?


    The man pulled Carynnes arm.


    Carynne Evans, please remain quiet.


    Whats your rank? Which household are you from? Identify yourself.


    Thats something you dont have to know.


    Carynne noted that this mans clothes were in, and his tone and ent were also rough, so she surmised that he was not officially employed by the royal family. If he was officially employed, he wouldnt speak this way.


    She looked around. There were a few more men who resembled him behind his figure.


    Even if youre acting under Crown Prince Gueuzes orders, its ridiculous how youre dragging a sleeping person out in the middle of the night. Tell him to send an invitation officially.


    Ha.


    If he wants to sleep with me, tell him to at least treat me like a concubine.


    <i>SLAP!</i>


    Carynne heaved.


    What the, just now. That man. Just now. My cheek. My face.


    Her head was spinning. She blinked. Unexpected violence from an unexpected person. Tears formed around her eyes.

 Chapter 114

    Chapter 114


    Carynne fell to the floor, then she stared up at the man.


    One.


    Two.


    He counted. Carynne had to think. She needed to make a choice. If things were to continue like this, at the very least, she would need to pretend to be a victim in front of Raymondthoroughly. She shouldnt just disappear.


    Carynne regretted thest two days wherein she tried to escape reality. But what should she do?


    Who was going to rescue her from the crown prince?


    How evil of you to sexually harass a woman like this.


    Then, like a miracle, a voice rang out. It was the assant''s son himself who hade to her rescuethe young royal who idolized Raymond.


    Prince Lewis came in.


    And, three knights followed.


    The attendant went down on his knees. The young prince looked down at the man, then turned to one of his knights.


    Do you know who this man is?


    No, Your Highness.


    Who are you?


    Your Highness need not exchange words with him. He is a lowly man.


    One knight stepped up and proceeded to talk to the kneeling man in ce of the young prince.


    State your identity.


    I am someone who runs errands under themand of Crown Prince Gueuze.


    Then, are you saying that Father had called Miss Carynne out at this time of the night?


    It seemed like the man didnt know how to respond to that.


    Why have youe to this ce at such ate hour, Your Highness?


    Wow.


    Lewisughed as if he thought it was funny.


    Despite saying that, you <i>still</i> dont seem to know who I am. Sir Knight, did you hear what this man just said?


    Yes, sir. He is trying to question a member of the Royal Family.


    I-I am not, Your Highness!


    As he was suddenly turned into an interrogator of a royal, the man visibly sweated.


    But Your Highness, that woman


    Why has she been summoned?


    I do not know, sir.


    Is the country in danger right now?


    Lewis kindly exined things to the man who did not understand what he was saying.


    If it is <i>not </i>a matter of national emergency and if we are <i>not</i> evacuating people at the moment, does Miss Carynne still need to go now?


    It is what Crown Prince Gueuze has demanded. I am only acting upon his orders.


    Shut up.


    The knight gripped the mans head.


    Itste at night, so she doesnt have to go right this instant. Isnt that right?


    Your Highness Please have mercy on me as well.


    The mans voice started shaking, just like how Carynnes voice did only a moment ago.


    Should I? Do I need to do such a thing?


    Prince Lewis exchanged a look with the knight, who then lifted the man by his head. As the young prince made eye contact with the man, he opened his lips to speak.


    Youd better think it over. Who exactly should you listen to?


    The man continued to grovel, however Prince Lewis turned to Carynne, who was bowing her head, and urged her to get up.


    You dont have to change your clothes, Miss. Well be gone in a minute.


    I extend my gratitude, Your Highness.


    But why was he here right now? Carynne was curious, but she wasnt sure whether she was allowed to ask questions, so she didnt ask any of them. Nevertheless, the young prince spoke up first.


    Sir Raymond sent over a carrier bird.


    Even so, how


    For a son to be concerned about who his father beds, goodness, is that actually a national affair?


    Carynne just bowed her head down. The door opened, and Prince Lewis gestured for the knight to follow.


    Ille back again soon to meet Lady Lianne. If I stay here in this mansion, such a brute wouldnt be able to step one foot inside.


    Then, Prince Lewis left without looking back, as if Carynnes gratitude was not particrly necessary.


    Carynne got up from the ground and sat down on the bed. That boy imitated Raymond a lot, including his attitude, his gestures, and even his hairstyle. The young prince seemed to be quite fond of the knight. Even though he still looked to be wet behind the ears in some aspects.


    She wondered how much hed change once hes all grown up. She had never once seen him like that before.


    Donna, tea.


    Had she note back yet?


    Carynne frowned.


    She hadnt been able to see her own personal maid for much too long. That girl was alright enough, so Carynne kept the maid next to her, but she was getting the feeling that Donna was bing too insincere about her job.


    Carynne clicked her tongue, recalled the other child she had used before.


    However, the next day, Donna did note back.


    Compared to the concern, orck thereof, she had about Raymonds extended absence, Carynne became more anxious about Donnas disappearance.


    Donna was not here.


    This had never happened before.


    No, actually, Donna had never been her personal maid before. Carynne had no idea about Donnas movements or her life thus far. Or where the maid would be around this time.


    Carynne was curious.


    Im not too sure She didnte here to pick up the food today. Oh goodness, arent you Miss Carynne?


    The head chef of the household, a middle-aged woman, looked surprised as she realized who Carynne was.


    Carynne just looked around the kitchen. It was extensivelyrge, and there were many people working here, given that this was a counts residence.


    At her sudden visit here, the head chef asked Carynne in a slightly shocked voice.


    Then, you havent been able to eat, Miss? Good gracious, Ill ask someone to bring your meal to your room in a jiffy. But still


    No, you dont need to. Im not hungry.


    Carynne shook her head at the nervous maids behind the head chef.


    Do you know where Donna has gone?


    No, Miss.


    In the first ce, Donna was Carynnes personal maid. And she was only living here because the countess had extended some goodwill towards her.


    Neither of them interacted with other people. Donna was a guests maid who simply takes food from the kitchen and delivers it. She was an outsider here, and other people were acquainted with her only to the extent of knowing the others name.


    Where did she go, I wonder.


    When was thest time she was seen?


    I dont know Two? Three days?


    Because of Crown Prince Gueuze, Carynne spent thest few days worrying so much to the point that she had practically be a cripple. She didnt know when exactly Donna had disappeared.


    By any chance, did she not say anything?


    Thest time Carynne saw Donna, she ordered her to deliver a letter. Where in the world did she disappear to? She might have stayed at the Evans manor for about a day, but it shouldnt take any longer than that.


    No, she didnt.


    Then, I believe its going to be a bit difficult to find her.


    Carynne rubbed her eyes. And when she saw the head chef turn around and say, Twelve boxes of bacon, to someone else, she stepped back.


    The maids were filled with anticipation, agitation and tension. They had no interest in Donnathey were just waiting for Carynne to leave. So, Carynne decided not to waste any more time here.


    Ill go to theundry area.


    You know where it is, Miss?


    Yes.


    Its not as if shed been to this ce only once or twice.


    And so, Carynne headed towards theundry area. The maids there seemed to have a lot of work as well.


    When she arrived, the person in charge came forward and responded to her questions even though she was busy. Theundry maids, however, didnt give much answers.


    Im not quite sure. Shes not someone who works with us here.


    Shall I send an exclusive seamstress to you, Miss?


    Later.


    Carynne had nothing to say to the maids who only cared about her safety and not Donnas. Theundry maids didnt even know Donnas name.


    And this was only natural. Donna was Carynnes personal maid. She wouldnt have had to interact with them.


    Um Miss.


    The person in charge of theundry area spoke up. Carynne looked back to face her.


    Kids like her tend to quit. May I know how old she is?


    Shes eighteen.


    Ive seen a lot of kids her age quit and run away. If she hasnte back after three days, then it would be better to forget about her, Miss.


    The head maid said the same thing.


    Everywhere in the mansion Carynne tried to go, she encountered only maidservants who were uptight and quite old. The particrly obstinate housekeeper of this residence even resembled Helen from the Hare manor. Come to think of it, where was she now?


    The housekeeper nced down at Carynne and spoke.


    May I ask, do you know when she left?


    I dont.


    Ill contact the police. But please, I would be grateful if you dont tell the other guests about this for the time being.


    And when will you contact the police?


    I will contact them as soon as the other guests have left.


    If Donna had truly been kidnapped, then no one would know.

 Chapter 115

    Chapter 115


    Before Carynnes expression could start to crumple, the housekeeper quickly added one more thing, as a sort of excuse.


    More than anyone else, I believe you know why, Miss.


    Right.


    Of course, Carynne knew the reality of the situation better than the housekeeper. Compared to investigating one maids disappearance, it was much more of an important matter to keep Prince Lewis stay in this residencefortable.


    Even within one day here in the capital, there were several cases of women like Donna disappearing. Very few of them would evene back as corpses. Its that kind of world.


    <i>Tak.</i>


    Carynne went back into her room, at the annex that Countess Elva had provided.


    Even if it was just a separate building, it was quite a luxurious ce to stay in, given that it had been provided by the counts family. This ce wasnt so bad.


    She thought of Donna. Her room was just a short distance away from Carynnes room.


    She then set off towards the ce she had never entered before.


    The maids staying at that maids room had changed from time to time. It was Nancy who stayed there most of the time. Sometimes it was Sera. Its the first time that Donna had lived in it.


    It was only a bit of a whim, but Carynne sometimes thought about slitting Donnas throat one day. Shes thought about this sometimes after she had strangled Nancy.


    Carynne did not like the constant stream of confusion she was being subjected to. She had intended to work hard in this lifeto kill, and kill and then kill some more. She wanted to test how far shed be able to go while avoiding Raymonds eyes. That had been Carynnes purpose.


    But Dun messed it up with that stupid wager thats not even funny.


    The purpose she had set for herself in this life had all gone to bust because of Dun. Carynnes entertainment had, in the end, be nothing more than a waste of time. Even if it was something as exciting as murder.


    The end that Carynne had wished forit was worth <i>less</i> than her own true death.


    Dun had put a halt to Carynnes next murder attempt, but by now, Carynne was less and less inclined to keep up this wager.


    This was because Raymonds love had eventually turned out to be the same as before, unchanged. It would have been more interesting if he tried to kill Carynne, but his unchanged love was raising her doubts once again.


    She shook her head.


    Right now, rather than Raymond or Dun, Carynne was more curious about Donna. Just as Nancys death had shown something new to Carynne, what new things would she be able to see with Donnas?


    Usually, the maids should stay at the main mansion, however Carynnes maids always followed her to where she was. Nancy was considered as Carynnes physician, so how about Donna?


    <i>Creeeak.</i>


    Would it be so fun if it turns out that Donnas actually behind the serial murders?


    She opened the door.


    And she was disappointed.


    Donnas room was no different.


    Carynne stared at the small bed, the small window, the small closet and the small deskthis room was just like any other servants room. Just <i>that.</i> A room like this could be seen even in the Hare manor. An exceedingly typical room.


    Ordinary maidservants usually shared rooms together, but Donna was a little different. Since she was a guests servant, she had a room to herself like this. It was a bit of a lonely room.


    But its still better than Sir Raymonds room.


    She looked around Donnas temporary room. It was different from Raymonds, which was always organized in a way that made it possible for him to leave right away.


    Here, there was make-up, clothes and flowers.


    Carynne walked towards the window.


    Hydrangeas, huh.


    She tilted her head to the side as she looked at the flowers. There were too many in her own room anyway, so if anyone asked to take some, then by all means, shed give away a lot.


    Donna had put a bouquet in a ss bottle. Did she buy it with her own money? On the one hand, Carynne thought that Donna spent her money on something so useless, but then she noticed somethingthe flowers were still fresh.


    With the flowers still being fresh like this, isnt this proof that it hasnt been long since she left?


    But wasnt that already obvious?


    Donna was still here a few days ago. At the bottom of the water bottleit was too shabby to call a vasethere was still some water. But Carynne couldnt infer anything more from that fact.


    Her desk, I guess?


    It was a small desk. There was another rough-looking cup there, but it was empty. Carynne supposed that there was actually no need for Donna to have had two of them.


    No diary, as expected


    She tried to see if Donna had a diary, or anything simr to it, but very few people kept diaries, unless they were children. Diaries were a great way to get to know someones innermost thoughts, but very few adults diligently jotted down their daily experiences because they were busy.


    Carynne herself didnt keep a diary. And she wasnt even all that busy, too.


    Theres no use for me since itll be erased anyway. Its not because Imzy.


    Mother must have thought the same. Ah, I wontin about that anymore in the future, Mother.


    Carynne nervously pulled back her hair, which was covering her face, as she apologized to her mother.


    This is a bit cheap


    She turned towards the make-up lined up on one shelf. Now that she thought about it, Nancy always put on red lipstickshe said that rouge was essential to make her dark skin stand out. Carynne made a note to herself that she should buy someter at the capital for Nancy.


    Of course, in the next life.


    She smiled at the thought of Nancy, choking underneath her. In her final moments, Nancys face had been a bit messy.


    Carynne looked into her own reflection in a small mirror. Then, she frowned at herself, at her face that was untouched by a maid.


    Donna wasnt here, so shed have to borrow another maidter.


    Soon, she turned around and headed towards Donnas bed.


    In the end I dunno.


    Carynne flopped down on the bed. The frame was narrow and the thin mattress was hard. Lying back down on that cheap bed, which was sure to inflict back pain on anyone whoy on top of it, she stared up at the ceiling.


    Im already well aware.


    Is it fun?


    I think its fun.


    People, disappearing.


    Thats something that has never happened before.


    Anything other than the norm is a good thing. Any type of change is fun.


    Right?


    Ow.


    Carynne changed the way she wasying on the bed, rubbing her sore back. Regardless of how anyone would say that this was a mere cheap bed, this was just too much.


    No, it seemed like there was something lying beneath.


    This reminded her of an old tale. Once upon a time, there was a princess who could not endure the inconvenience brought upon her by a tiny little pea that was lying beneath the twelve thick mattresses that she wasying oplete with even duck feather duvets over those mattresses.


    But what Carynne was lying down over wasnt a pea, and Donnas bed was definitely not that thick. This was a maids bed after all.


    It was something much bigger than a pea


    Like a box.


    Something of this size couldnt possibly have been put here by mistake. Anyone would grimace and sit up immediately because of a thing of that sizeying underneath them. And even if they couldnt see it, theyd definitely notice it right away after lying down once.


    She got up. Theres something on the floor underneath the bed. So, she would take it out.


    Carynne grabbed the bed over its fabric. It was a little heavy, but not to the point that she couldnt lift it alone. The dusty bedframe started creaking, but that was of no concern to her. Something important was down there.


    Oh my.


    Therey a treasure chest beneath.


    Carynne pulled it out, her eyes twinkling.


    A treasure chest?


    It was literally a chest that looked like a treasure chest. As it was wrapped in purple silk, Carynne wrenched away the cover.


    Such a thing stood out like a sore thumb inside a maids room.


    When the cloth was relentlessly pulled away, she then saw a light brown wooden box.


    If she opened it now, what woulde out of it?


    Carynne calmed her rising exhration, a smile tugging up on the corners of her lips.


    Donnas money? A secret diary? No, probably not. If its something like those things, Donna would have taken them with her when she disappeared.


    Carynne was now expecting that it was rted to herself.


    If Nancy was someone who had messed with Carynnes memories, then maybe Donna was also connected to Carynne in a simr way?


    Or what if its actually, <i>boooom! </i>A bomb

 Chapter 116

    Chapter 116


    Still though, when Carynne leaned down and cupped her ear, she couldnt hear the sound of a ticking clock. In fact, even if a bomb had really been installed inside, she didnt know if a real bomb would make that kind of sound. The only bomb she knew about was what she had seen in ysa huge bundle of candles with an exaggeratedlyrge clock attached to it.


    She didnt care if she were to die here, of course. Right now, the only thing that would have stopped Carynne from opening the chest was the small, tugging conscience telling her that she should respect other peoples privacy. But, well, in this life, she was determined to indulge in the pleasures of murder and gluttony.


    So, Carynne opened the box with glee.


    And when she did, she was a little stunned. Inside was a card to convey a congrattory message for her uing wedding, and some jewelry as a gift. It wasnt what she was expecting.


    At the front side of the card were the words, To Carynne.


    From whom could it possibly be?


    Then, at the back of the card,


    <b> Congrattions on your wedding. </b>


    Carynne stared at the words on the card, however, she couldnt immediately tell whose writing it was.


    cing that card down on the floor, she then went on to look down at the other contents of the chest.


    A card, some jewelry, a few flowers. It was fine up until that point.


    This other thing was the problem.


    At first, Carynne thought that it was just another kind of essory. Because it had been camouged well underneath.


    It was a human hand.


    A human hand that had been adorned with flowers and gold and silver jewelry. The part where it had been cut off was clean, decorated even with pink ribbons.


    At first nce, it looked like a gift for a girl who liked cute things.


    However, there was one detail that would suggest that this matter had not been handled as meticulously as it was trying to present itself as. There was dried blood stuck on the edges of the hands fingernails.


    Donna?


    Carynne asked the quiet surroundings one question.


    And of course, there was no answer.


    Is this Donnas hand?


    If not, then whose?


    Why?


    Why is this here?


    Who put this here?


    Carynne did not scream. She wasnt even appalled.


    In fact, she thought that something more ominous woulde out of this chest, which had been lodged beneath the bed. Its certainly surprising to see, but rather than being afraid, she merely felt curious.


    Who could it be?


    Someone sent this hand to her. She didnt have to think all that hard about it since her name was clearly written on that card over there. Still, the sender didnt sign their name.


    Who could it be? Some people might have been able to guess just by taking one look at the handwriting, but Carynne couldnt recognize it at all. And it was such a sophisticated script.


    It might be Mister Verdic Evans or not.


    He was the one who had persecuted Carynne the most throughout the years, but it was difficult for her to imagine him hatching up a n to send a womans chopped up body part to her. Rather than ughtering a different woman in order to frighten Carynne, Verdic Evans would have juste up to her with an axe in hand, personally swinging it right across her neck.


    Mister Verdic has got more of a temper than he looks.


    Verdic did not know Carynne all that well, but on the flip side, she knew <i>him</i> very well. So, Carynne crossed Verdics name off the list.


    Verdic had killed Carynne so many times before that she knew he wouldnt do such a thing like this. He was strangely queasy about certain things.


    So, Carynne thought of another man.


    Crown Prince Gueuze is the likeliest suspect then.


    He was the most usible guess. After all, hadnt he recently sent a summons to her?


    She had to wonder whether a member of the royal family would really do something like this. Still, she did not know him well. He was one of her mothers menan old, withered man. A man with a strong stomach.


    This was all that Carynne knew about him.


    Did he have such a hobby, perhaps?


    But then, why now?


    Carynne was nothing but a stranger to him. Why was this pervertwho was so obsessed with her mother and, in turn, also so very obsessed with herdoing this <i>now</i>, of all times, when he never showed any hint of this obsession over all those years?


    At best, the only thing he did before was look at Carynnes face andment that she resembled her mother, Catherine. He never even attended any of her weddings.


    It was for this reason that she couldnt one hundred percent confirm that this was the work of Crown Prince Gueuze.


    And.


    Dun.


    Carynne recalled her fianc, Dun. It was a low possibility, but maybe its him?


    Thest time Carynne saw Donna, she had sent her on an errand.


    Give this letter to Dun.


    The letter contained her own concerns, and about how she was delegating her choice to Dun. Thest person that Donna met was likely to be Dun.


    Seriously, this life has been so difficult


    Would that man, as Carynne knew him, really do this?


    Carynne knew him as a man who stuttered constantly, who was always anxious, and had a penchant for ming others. He would act timidly as if he was lowering his tail in front of Carynne. However, when it came to other people he thought were below him, he would look down on them so severely as well.


    Other than that, he had so many ws to his personality.


    Carynne has known this man for not just one year, but one hundred years. And there were several instances wherein other men, who were like Dun, would stab her on the final day. Most of them were men of God.


    Even so, Dun never killed Carynne.


    Umm


    She didnt believe that Duns morality was still intact. On the other hand, she believed in his ughtering skills.


    Every time the festival was held, Dun would ughter countless animals. Most were small animals, but sometimes, he would kill a huge one, like a cow.


    Dun looked sick and tired of doing it, but hed very deftly strike the cows head with little force and then cut off the bloodstream in the animals neck.


    In the case of a bird, he could easily twist its neck at once.


    Carynne touched the cold hand. The fingernails had blood on them, and the cut was roughly done. By her estimation, it looked like the cut had been made while the person was still alive.


    She recalled the time that she had chopped up Thomas. She had been able to make clean cuts to the body since he was already dead. Since she didnt have much strength, she had to do it carefully, but her cuts had definitely not been like this.


    This cut on (presumably) a womans wrist was quite rough. The cut must have been made while she was still alive.


    Carynne thought about the woman, who would have watched her own hand being hacked off right in front of her wide eyes.


    It really might be Donna, huh.


    The hand had some callouses, which werent all that small, but werent very hardened from age either. This hand was that of a woman around Carynnes age. And its not a nobles.


    This line of logic didnt need any further thought.


    Unless Donna turns out to be an insane murderer, then this hand must truly be Donnas.


    And Carynne, too, could only think that it really was hers. Because it was sent to Carynne. And, she wasnt acquainted with that many other women. Its unlikely that anyone would cut off their own hand and present it as a gift.


    Its Donna, maybe Donna. Was Dun thest person she met?


    Again, of course, her surroundings did not answer back.


    Carynne picked up the severed hand and held it as though they were shaking hands.


    Its weird, this sensation of touching a dead chunk of meat.


    When she had killed Nancy, it was a fresh corpse, and she couldnt think of much else. She had been so excited that she couldnt remember the details of it.


    When she had chopped up Thomas dead body, she was so absorbed in thinking that she might just be crazy.


    And when her father died, she had been too distracted by the fire.


    While holding the womans hand, Carynne closed her eyes. She wondered if even a little sympathy would arise. However, Carynne shed not a single teardrop. She only thought, <i>is she dead, is she alive?</i>


    She was curious, but not sad.


    More than anything, the question that was at the forefront of her mind was, So, what would Dun answer?


    Dun never mentioned when hed give his answer.


    He just said that it had to be true love. But theres not much time left now.


    Carynne had put it off because she did not want to choose. Now, however, she knew that she must.


    How would she die? Once shed settle on a choice, she could feel the sensation as though it was happening already.


    She looked out the window, where quite a few servants were bustling with activity.


    The greenhouse shall be repaired tomorrow!


    Themb has arrived!


    Check the third floors hallway again!


    While preparing for Prince Lewis arrival, the servants were scurrying around like crazy, making a fuss like never before. They had always been quiet just like the count households members who they were serving, but Prince Lewis sudden visit had set everyone into a flurry. Carynne could easily imagine Lady Liannes cheeks turning bright red while trying on dozens of clothes.


    When is heing?


    Tomorrow!


    If she were to stay put, she would have a happy ending.


    Once again, Raymond said that he loves Carynne. And, once again, he asked her to marry him. Just like before.


    Crown Prince Gueuze had be the viin who wanted to have Carynne all to himself, but his son, Prince Lewis, had prevented that.


    All she needed to do was wait in this room. Just stay as the girl in love, waiting for Raymond to return. If love could be attained in this lifeif Dun would acknowledge itthen it would all end.


    Would it be the end?


    Like how it was before?

 Chapter 117

    Chapter 117


    Carynne stood up. And she put the hand back into the chest.


    Women should always be prepared. Carynne got up, tidied her hair, wore the ne and earrings, then changed her clothes. There was no maid by her side, so she had to do everything alone.


    Carynne was not used to doing trivial things alone. Shes too old for this.


    Its hard to change clothes alone.


    She sighed as she did her best to tuck herself into the cumbersome clothes. She gave up on tightening the corsetit wasnt something that could be done alonebut she wondered if her belly was sticking out. As she wiped her face, the slight thought of it made her smile.


    She turned her head up and put on her essories. She had to pay special attention to the ne.


    Carynne picked up the pearl ne. She quite liked this one. The ne had three rows of thick pearls and several diamonds in between. She didnt often wear such jewelry because it was too luxurious, but now was the time to wear it.


    It was simr to Ises ne, but Carynnes was better. She hung it around her neck. It would have been better if she could wear clothes that were a little morefortable.


    It didnt matter if her back had several cuts. She chose a dress that boldly revealed her back. She wouldnt be appearing in front of many people anyway, so its going to be fine.


    After all, Dun secretly liked such clothes.


    The Dun I know is a pervert.


    And so, Carynne got dressed and put on some make-up. Putting on red lipstick would make her look mature. Then, after everything, she wore a ck cloak with a hood.


    Covering her head with the hood, Carynne slipped out of the room.


    Carynne did not want to have a happy ending thats like this.


    * * *


    Dun must still be here.


    Carynne stared at Ise Evans mansion. Most of the lights were off. Before she knew it, night had already fallen.


    Should I knock on the door?


    Her legs had gotten exhausted thus far, and her steps eventually stopped. She didnt think that this mansion was going to be this far.


    She couldnt use one of the count households carriages because she had gone out without Countess Elvas knowledge. She took a passenger carriage once on the way, but because this was private property, the carriage couldnt get off the main roads.


    And seriously, the Evans manor was too humongous. The carriage had stopped in front of their gates earlier. Its a good thing that the way to the mansion was deserted because of howrge the property was. Carynne had walked through the bushes.


    Is theirnd really this wide?


    Carynne went through the back door, which she used to go through a lot while she had been Ises handmaid. It was locked, but she knew that the spare key was being hidden underneath a small statue right next to the door.


    When the door opened, she was faced with the sight of the cer.


    I dont know which one is Duns room.


    Only then did Carynne realize that she did not know. Even if Carynne had lived in the Evans manor many times before, this was the first time that Dun hade with her until this point.


    Haa.


    Sighing, Carynne walked forward cautiously. She recalled where the guest rooms were.


    <i>Ta-dak. Ta-dak.</i>


    Unbeknownst to her, the evening had settled in, and the house was entirely still.


    Carynne took off her shoes and held them in her hands. Since the Evans familys manor had marble floors, no matter how much she tried to be discreet, her footsteps were endlessly noisy. So, she picked up her shoes and headed towards the hallway of the guest rooms.


    Even if the mansion was engulfed with darkness, it was not difficult for her to find her way around because it was a familiar ce.


    The splendid mansion was awash with slumber and darkness. Carynne did not want to wake anyone up. All she wanted was to meet Dun. She wanted to avoid the flustering situation of bumping into Verdic Evans for no reason.


    Different mansions had different internal rules. Still, Carynne knew the general rules of the Evans manor somewhat. If she happened to chance upon a locked guest room, then that would be Duns. The people in the Evans manor didnt bother locking any unused rooms.


    Ah.


    The door was open. Carynne was slightly taken aback as the doorknob in her hand twisted smoothly, not getting caught. She peeked inside just in case, but as expected, it was an empty room. This was the first room along this hallway, so it was the first one that she checked.


    Carynne closed the door and headed for the next room.


    This room was empty as well. What the. Carynne was baffled.


    Was Dun <i>not</i> at the Evans manor? Why? He should be keeping Ise asleep for Carynnes sake right now. Carynne was definitely baffled. Dun should be here right now to take care of Ise. Its not a normal illness, so he needed to be by her side to keep her constantly drugged. But why? At this hour? Where did he go?


    Whos there?


    Carynne caught sight of a servant walking up to her some distance away, bringing amp with him. She quickly hid, rushing towards the stairs. But the servant kepting towards Carynne.


    She should avoid him at all costs. Carynne decided to go up the stairs.


    She rushed up the steps. She knew where she was headed right now. Its the top floor. And she had to check.


    Over there at the top floor was Ise Evans room.


    Something felt off.


    Who goes there!


    This time again, another unexpected person appeared. The houses tranquility had been broken. Even if Verdic would give hershings again, she needed to check.


    Carynne nearly broke into a run.


    <i>Tadaktadak.</i>


    She saw a door. The door to Ise Evans room was locked, but Carynne knew how to open it.


    She kicked the door down. Hard.


    The door opened.


    And.


    Where did you go?


    Ises room was empty. Theres not a soul inside. Dun wasnt there, neither was Ise, whos supposed to be lying down on the bed.


    Carynne strode into the room and threw the bedcovers to the side. Empty. She moved again and looked at the trash can. Empty. It seemed like its been a while since anyone used it. What about the basement?


    What the hell.


    And then someone from behind Carynne covered her mouth.


    She felt a familiar sensation.


    The sensation of being suffocated.


    * * *


    Dun. Ise. Donna.


    Inside the empty room, Carynne looked at her surroundings. It was dim all around her.


    Still as ever, no one was there.


    She opened her eyes. Then she closed them, and opened them again. She couldnt see a thing.


    It looked like its still nighttime.


    Carynne closed her eyes and went back to sleep. The pull of slumber was strong as it tugged upon her consciousness. But then, she felt the odd sensation of cloth on her cheek.


    She opened her eyes again. Her cloudy rationality was gradually returning to her.


    Its dark. Where was she?


    Carynne squirmed on the bed that she was lying on now. There was a rope at the side of the bed. But she couldnt reach it.


    Ah.


    Carynne recalled what happened before she had lost consciousness. She was at the Evans manor.


    She went there to meet Dun. But Dun wasnt there. So, she went to Ises room, but she wasnt there either. It was when she was looking around Ises room that she fainted.


    Where was this ce. Carynney face down on the bed and tried to recall. Its extremely dark. So, its a ce without windows. Or, a room with thick curtains. And what about the person who had kidnapped her from the Evans manor, where were they?


    Carynne got up.


    Where is this ce


    It was extremely dark.


    She sat back on the bed. It was too dark for her to stand up.


    Verdic Evans?


    She called out to the man, but she couldnt hear any response.


    Sitting there in the dark, she tried to figure out what was going on around her now.


    She lost consciousness at the Evans manor. Was she still inside that ce?


    But its weird.


    Carynne stood up and fumbled around. She had to open at least one window so she could check out the room. Or, maybe open the door.


    But it was too dark and Carynne was a little scared to walk around in this pitch-ck darkness.


    No. The dark wasnt scary. Thats not whats frightening.


    Comforting herself, Carynne got up and reached out her arms in front of her.


    She then started to walk around the room.


    After a few steps, she reached a cold wall. The icy surface induced goosebumps to rise all over her skin. The stone walls were exceedingly cold.


    Still, she had to walk with her hands on those walls.

 Chapter 118

    Chapter 118


    Ow.


    Something rattled. Was it an ornament or something? Carynne pressed down on all sorts of imaginations that popped up in her mind. She put her hands against the wall again.


    Still, her knees were hurting a little. As she fumbled further along in the dark, she soon felt a wooden surface, not stone this time.


    Its a door. However, its not a bedroom door. It was twice as wide as a normal bedroom door, and there was an iron bar oveid horizontally across the middle of it.


    She found the knob. They were double circr knobs. And they were difficult to turn.


    Heavy.


    Carynne pulled, but that didnt work. She pushed this time, yet it didnt work either. She managed to twist it a little, but it would not open.


    Someone had locked it from outside.


    Why?


    Was this the cer? But Carynne knew Verdic Evans cer very well. He tended to give corporal punishment to his servants in that cehe would never have put a bed there.


    What use would there be for a bed when its a space dedicated for corporal punishment? Or, maybe theres another room in the basement? Carynne couldnt remember.


    This was not Verdic Evans mansion.


    Carynne came to that conclusion. However, even if she had, she still couldnt understand.


    Why would Verdic Evans bring me here


    Even if she was thought to be a thief who had snuck into the Evans manor, did that constitute for her confinement in a ce such as this? It would be more than enough to humiliate her and kick her out of his property. And if he would like to take it a step further, he could call in the police and tell them shes a thief. Carynne was merely a teenage girl on the outside.


    Her questions were soon answered.


    Because the door creaked open.


    Youre awake.


    It was Crown Prince Gueuze.


    It was so obviously clich. This wasnt a new plot twist or anythingCarynne blinked dazedly as she thought this. In the end, she would end this life as Crown Prince Gueuzes ything.


    Thinking that she should hang herself at the first opportunity shed get, Carynne sighed openly.


    Light up the room. Since shes awake now, she has to get up.


    Crown Prince Gueuze ordered the servants standing behind him.


    They hung several torches along the wall, then revealing the interior to Carynne. It looked muchrgerpared to how it felt while it was still dark. And the ceiling was so high, making the room feel even bigger.


    Was this the royal pces basement? It felt inevitably damp because this was underground, but the moisture in the air soon dissipated because of the torches that were lit everywhere.


    The firece wont be lit because its still warm now. Is that alright?


    Yes.


    Right. Its still summer. There would be no need to light the firece. Its important to keep the temperature at a moderate degree.


    This would be the optimal temperature for the ornaments being disyed in the room. Carynne could understand.


    There were many luxurious items here. And this ce had many differencespared to Verdics mansion. For one, Verdics cer was solely used for corporal punishment, but this.


    This was a yground.


    The bed that Carynne wasying on up until a while ago was covered with green silk sheets, and by the firece, there was a table and some chairs. Atop the table were a few books. The chairs were iid with gold, and the table was made with marble and ivory.


    The bookshelf against the wall contained many books and other ornaments. On the shelves, there was a chess set, some cards, even dolls for children to y with. Carynne was going to die while trying to conform to Crown Prince Gueuzes tastes.


    He gestured towards one chair, and she walked forward and sat there.


    I went to Mister Verdics home, but when I woke up, I found myself here instead.


    Its because Verdic Evans wants to look good in front of me. He must have heard that I like you.


    Crown Prince Gueuze spoke with a much sleazier tone than when he first met her. He even smiled.


    So Verdic Evans caught her and decided to sell her.


    Carynne became infuriated with Verdic. She would have preferred that he go and hack away at her neck like the good ole times instead of <i>this.</i>


    Thats why he handed me over?


    She only entered that mans mansion with the intention of meeting Dun.


    Crown Prince Gueuze smiled and walked up to Carynne.


    Hes a greedy merchant. You wouldnt know because youre still young.


    One hand reached up to stroke Carynnes cheek. The mans wrinkled hand was slightly trembling. It seemed like he was holding back.


    Even so, it didnt look like hed be able to hold onto this patience for much too long.


    Carynne opened her mouth to speak. She needed to divert his attention.


    What did you give to Mister Verdic Evans in exchange?


    Thats not something you have to concern yourself with now.


    Why did Verdic Evans hand me over?


    Crown Prince Gueuze brought one finger into Carynnes lips. She wanted to continue speaking, to defy him, but she couldnt go against his strength. Instead, he was the one who spoke.


    Your lips are pretty.


    Should she say thank you?


    But it was difficult to do because her mouth was wrenched open like this. And he didnt seem to be waiting for a response either.


    He pulled out his hand. Carynne frowned because there was a distinctly salty aftertaste left behind. That, right there, was something she couldnt put up with.


    Carynnes expression became distorted at once, but Crown Prince Gueuze didnt seem to care much about it.


    There is only one thing that Verdic Evans wants.


    Crown Prince Gueuze offered a hand to Carynne. He looked like the very image of politeness right then. She took his hand. Then, he put his other hand on Carynnes waist.


    Holding her closeone hand each intertwined, another handid upon her waisthe spun her around. She looked behind her.


    He wants your ruination.


    You are his daughters nemesis. He said that youre an immoral child whomitted patricide. Is that true? Did you kill Hare?


    There was no music, but its as if there was a song echoing through the air.


    How? But the truth was obvious. Carynne recalled the empty bedroom. And recalled the man who was not at the ce where he was supposed to be.


    Ah. So its like that.


    Dun betrayed her.


    Crown Prince Gueuze pulled Carynnes waist and led her into a step. His body was moving ording to a certain rhythm.


    But I will not ruin you. Why would I do that? Ive had this much of a difficult time obtaining you, havent I?


    Since youve acted only in such ways that I like, how could I possibly hate you?


    Her father, hanging by a rope. Rocking, swayinga smile on his lips.


    Youre saying that I killed someone that Tom killed? You know very well that this isnt the case. Shouldnt you have stopped? No, you surely would have run forward. Youd have pounced and tightened that noose around my neck,ughing all the while.


    The pleasant times were over.


    He didnt have to, but with a secret tone akin to a lovers sweet nothings, Crown Prince Gueuze leaned in and whispered into Carynnes ear.


    Was it fun? Its alright. Ill protect you.


    You have no intention of letting me out of here.


    Thats right. So I hope that youe to like this room.


    They danced. He led Carynnes body, and Carynne let herself be led. They danced and spun across the room as she looked around.


    It will be fun.


    The room was evidently luxurious and quite spacious. Most of the furnishings of the room were sparkling. Apart from that, there were many toys here, too. Carynne was mesmerized by all the things in here. Each one of them were all the finest of their kind.


    The most notable of all were the ornaments that were hanging on the walls.


    Ah.


    With the ceiling so high up, the walls were packed with those very decorations. Those that were a far distance away even resembled some famous paintings of peoplethats what youd think at first.


    Either shed scream, or shed ask Crown Prince Gueuze about this collection of his.


    Carynne did not scream. But it was not alright.


    What she was seeing right now, adorning the walls all spread out like that, were real people.


    I want to hear your thoughts.


    Most of them were women, a few here and there were men. Carynnes gaze gravitated towards the young woman who was the closest to her now. That woman was positioned with her arms wide open, like the blessed Holy Mother. Where the skin over her torso should have been, all Carynne could see was an emptied-out stomach. The ce where that womans red, bloody organs should have been.


    And amongst all those people serving as ornaments, Carynne saw one familiar face. It was her personal maidall clothes off, missing one hand and one foot.


    Donna and Carynne locked gazes.


    The maids mouth opened.


    Hu ah.


    What left Donnas lips, instead of words, was silence.


    And blood, dripping down her gaping mouth.

 Chapter 119

    Chapter 119


    Your Highness.


    Carynne said, her voice stifled. She felt so suffocated that she didnt need to act as if she was. Her voice resembled Donnas.


    She recalled the serial murders and numerous disappearances of women in the capital. So many people had disappeared like that, and yet why was the investigation not going well? Why were the articles in the newspapers about these incidents always just written about so sparsely?


    Baron Ein should have been the culprit, so why.


    Carynne thought of the reason.


    Baron Ein was supposedly caught as a suspect after he gambled away his money, lost to Carynne and went bankrupt. His trial got dragged on strangely, but he was eventually released due tock of evidence.


    She spected that Baron Ein had prepared money elsewhere to create witnesses to his defense, but in the end, this was not the case.


    Crown Prince Gueuze gave money to Baron Ein.


    Baron Ein isnt the kind of man whod kill.


    Raymond was right.


    She made eye contact with Donna. Tears were streaming down the maids eyes.


    Carynne should have brought Donnas hand hereso she could connect it back to her.


    No, no. Come back to your senses.


    However.


    May I scream?


    Even to Carynne, what she said just now sounded so idiotic.


    <i>Shit, what did I just say?</i> Carynne wants to cry. No, a few teardrops were already escaping in the first ce.


    I would like  to scream. May I?


    Please, please.


    Crown Prince Gueuze, generous as he was, allowed it.


    And so, Carynne screamed.


    It was a scream that she herself could not evenprehend. She felt that she wouldnt be able to endure any longer letting out this scream.


    Crown Prince Gueuzeughed, Carynne screamed.


    They were in each others arms,ughing and screaming, as they danced a waltz, going round and round.


    The royal dance instructors might be proud to see Crown Prince Gueuze at this moment. Even with a screaming woman in his embrace, he danced adeptly. There was no music, and yet he led her to perfection, never missing a beat.


    Perfect, yes, though the instructors would still be ashamed of him nheless. There was a smile so undignified and so distorted pasted on his lips. He couldnt control his glee, looking as if he was almost drooling in his riotousughter.


    Hehehehe!


    As the female lead who had rejected her happy ending, was this what she deserved to receive?


    Carynne had this fleeting thought.


    You must have been very shocked.


    Im alright now.


    In the end, no matter what happened, she couldnt possibly scream all day.


    Carynne regained herposure. Just in her mind, of course. Perhaps the situation was too frightening for her body to be calm as well.


    In any case, Crown Prince Gueuze stoppedughing just as Carynne stopped screaming. It was a relief, too, because his smile looked horrendous.


    Even so, the dance continued. Carynne kept being dragged around by him.


    Leading her, Crown Prince Gueuze asked.


    Did you like my gift?


    So the gift was from him, too. Carynne felt the urge to retch as she imagined how Crown Prince Gueuze himself might have carefully and attentively wrapped the chest, tied it with a pretty ribbon and even added flowers.


    She felt sick because this old man seemed to be imitating young women. Even the very contents of the chest was a real human body part.


    Your Highness has a bad habit.


    Do I?


    Carynne tried to exin withposure.


    Yes. The part where the hand had been cut wasnt clean. Shouldnt there have been proper preparations first? But seeing the extreme measures done it see seems that you dont quite like going about it artistically.


    Haha, it seems like I chose the wrong gift.


    Gueuze guffawed cheerfully once more.


    It wasnt a properugh, but it wasnt a clown-likeugh like earlier either.


    He halted abruptly.


    He stoppedughing, and he stopped dancing.


    Previously so close to her, Crown Prince Gueuze slightly pulled away to nce down at Carynne.


    I dont like girls who pretend to be strong.


    One of his hands gripped tighter. Carynne could feel his fingernails digging into the skin of her hand that he was holding. It hurts.


    Crown Prince Gueuze continued speaking.


    Its ridiculous how people tremble so severely like that, yet pretend to bepletely fine. Ive encountered only those kinds of people. Pretending to feel differently, pretending not to be scared, pretending to be something special.


    He grabbed Carynnes chin. He gripped her tightly. It hurts. He turned her head to the side. She saw Donnas face. The maids face was so bloodied that her expression couldnt be seen properly.


    Crown Prince Gueuze slinked closer to Carynne again and led her to Donna. As the distance between them decreased, she could see Donnas face clearer.


    Most people were like that. They pretended to act strong at first, too. Of course, until one arm gets chopped off. Under normal circumstances, what kind of maid is she? You know, she was so noisy Though shes quiet now, after one foot was cut off. Has she always been that talkative?


    I asked you a question.


    He held her with a tighter grip once again. Pressed hard on her cheek. Carynne must answer.


    What was Donna like? What kind of girl was she? Carynne did not know Donna all that well. The Donna who Carynne had met before was just normal. Moderately nice, moderately sincere. She frequently made mistakes, but thats not so strange because she had formerly been aundry maid.


    She was just normal.


    For some reason, he did not kill her. And for some reason, he just kept her around.


    Carynne looked at Donna. She was covered with blood. It wasnt that hard to imagine what must have been done to her before Carynne came here.


    Would it be Carynnes turn next?


    What a very insincere answer. Child. You, young maid. It seems like your master doesnt care about you. Doesnt this make you sad?


    Carynne continued to look at Donna. Their eyes met.


    Carynne genuinely felt upset when she saw Donna. She didnt feel this terrible when she had chopped up Thomas body, or even when she watched the mans body go rotten.


    It felt so strange to see a woman, still alive, have her body be mutted like this.


    Did the difference lie with their genders, because one was a man and one was a woman? Or was it because Carynne herself was still soft? As expected, she seemed to have a weak stomach.


    After observing Carynnes reaction, Gueuze turned back towards Donna.


    In fact, your master had killed the Fief Lordher father. I wonder how you feel now that you know about it.


    Gueuze brought a hand under Donnas chin, and as she looked up, her eyes went wide and she opened her mouth. <i>Uh, uh</i> there came the terrible sound of her voice.


    Uh.


    She had no tongue.


    No, scratch that. She still had a tongue, but it looked like it had been crushed. Carynne almost bit her own tongue.


    Staring at Carynnes face, Gueuze patted her back as if he was feeling sorry for her. He did it ever so gently, just like how he had patted the head of the maid.


    Then, he spoke softly.


    I didnt do it on purpose. I valuemunication. Being able to talk to one another is an invaluable gift and privilege that God has bestowed upon us. She had bitten her tongue on her own.


    Gueuze shrugged and grabbed Donnas cheek. This time, it was a rough gesture that was different from the touch he gave Carynne. Donna let out a pained groan.


    How had she kept silent since earlier when she was suffering so gravely like that? Did she faint? Carynne wished that the maid just remained unconscious. Carynne did not want to look at Donna.


    Observing Carynnes face, Crown Prince Gueuze spoke once more.


    Anyway, Im curious about what this child thinks of you now. Hm?


    Ah.


    An afterimage of Tom shed through Carynnes mind. It felt cruel to see someone not being able to speak. And it was miserable for one to give up on the words that could never be said.


    However, Crown Prince Gueuze spoke on behalf of Donna with a smooth voice.


    This child sold information about you.


    Carynne looked at Donna. Donna looked back at Carynne as well. The two women did not talk. They just looked at each other.


    What time you sleep, what time you wake up, what kinds of dishes you like eating, what kind of worries you talk about, which people you like All those things.


    Donna would have thought that it would be alright to divulge those things. Shed have thought that it wasnt a big deal. Its just Carynnes daily life.


    Carynne looked at Donna. And she thought of her own rough hands, of the days when she had to live alone in the mansion.


    All sorts of thoughts tend to pass through anyones mind whenever theyre alone. And while Carynne was working for Ise Evans in her mansion, she had lived a harsher life than Donna.


    Deardy who needed to be protected, deardy who lived such a pitiful life, deardy who had lost her parents and was being abused by her enemies.


    Even so, Carynne had Raymond.


    The knight fell in love with the prettydy, defeated the viins, and lived happily ever after with her.


    Happy ending.


    Thedy was beautiful, pitiful.


    The knight was brave, valiant.


    Thedys maid, too, would have received a higher wage. She would have be a better paid maid.

 Chapter 120

    Chapter 120


    Did this mean that the maid loathes to have a higher sry? Then theres nothing that could be done. Still, perhaps the maid hates thedy? Or, would the maid try to kill thedy and pretend to be thedy herself? But a maid cannot be ady. The knight held no feelings for the maid. No, the knight isnt the problem. A maid is a maid, ady is ady. Its a lie that every girl is a princess.


    But, at the end of the day, wasnt it of little concern if the maid tries to earn <i>a little</i> more money, right? Even if it was an old fart of a crown prince who would give her the money.


    Carynne looked at Donna, reading Donnas story behind her eyes.


    What do you think of this insolent maid? As expected, shouldnt we punish her?


    Donna would have surely said these things about Carynne to Gueuze. That thedy is pretty, nice and pitiful. If she feels that, sometimes, her words werent being received well, shed change it up a little. And, she noticed that what the crown prince liked the most to hear about was how Carynne looked just like Catherine.


    Gueuzes ideal woman was one who looked exactly like Catherine.


    Thinking about it in her perspective, she was just trying her hardest to survive.


    Carynne did not hate Donna.


    Truthfully, it was difficult to anger Carynne at all. Emotions meant nothing to her. She was going about life as though she was in a haze.


    As he, too, was immersed in his own lunacy, Crown Prince Gueuze yelled at her, but still, Carynne found it difficult to interpret Donnas actions as something along the lines of betrayal.


    Carynne, just


    Just.


    She just wants Gueuze to let go of her right now.


    I dont resent her.


    Nevertheless, Gueuze seemed to like that answer very much.


    Perfect.


    Crown Prince Gueuze answered in a jubnt voice.


    You give exactly the same answers as Catherine.


    I am not my mother.


    Carynne was displeased. She looked like Catherine, suffered the same curse as Catherine, but that didnt mean that she should be obligated to clean up her mothers mess. Still, her words would not reach him.


    You have the same principles as her, you say such simr things to what she had saidno, you even almost say the same things. Catherine answered that way as well. If I recall correctly, wasnt it a woman named Deere whos her friend and maid?


    Missus Deere Are you talking about her?


    Carynne recalled her governess, who was her mothers friendand someone she had killed. Gueuze nodded.


    Ah, yes. Thats her name. A while back, I had a few of her fingernails wrenched out because she had been so cheeky about Catherine. She was gossiping about Catherine behind her back, saying things that cant be said about a friend.


    I see.


    Now that she thought about it, Carynnes father didnt like Missus Deere either. Albeit jokingly, he mentioned how she was aiming for him as well. At the same time, Missus Deere had been the governess who was very against Nancy, and so he also seemed to harbor some dislike against her because of this.


    You are Carynnes governessnot a member of my family. Resign at once and leave my house.


    Still, until the end, Missus Deere had been the only one who was staunchly opposed to doing the things that had been to Carynne.


    The governess had been prepared to be fired from her job as she stood opposed to those things, yet Carynne couldnt remember and she even killed the older woman just because of a little irritation.


    Though she was knocking on deaths door, Missus Deere did not curse Carynne at all.


    However, Crown Prince Gueuze wouldnt have known such a thing.


    Nevertheless, Catherine defended her. What do you think she said?


    I dont know.


    Distress was eating at Carynne. No matter what Crown Prince Gueuze could ever say, to Carynne, he was just a mere misguided, old man. If he was thinking about killing her, then shed rather prefer that he do it quickly. Or perhaps, she should just kill <i>him</i> quickly. Either or would suffice, just do it already.


    Focus.


    Gueuze grabbed Carynne by her hair.


    She probably said that its not a big deal.


    Nothing matters to her. This pain, too, would soon be over.


    As Crown Prince Gueuze kept asking for answers that she didnt have, it became difficult for Carynne to match him. Even so, Carynnes haphazard answer still pleased Gueuze.


    Correct. Thats what she said.


    As pain shot through her from her scalp, tears started to well up in her eyes. Was it because she was sick? It felt a bit more painful.


    You are not Catherine. Evidently, theres a lot of differences between you two. But, no matter. You still have very many things inmon.


    Nothing matters.


    At the end of the day, you are the legacy that Catherine left for me What matters is that we will be together from now on.


    Do I have a choice?


    Carynne asked, scraping out thest bit of her pride. Gueuzeughed at her face.


    Then, he pressed hard on Donnas cheeks.


    No.


    Donnas mouth opened.


    Dear maid.


    I have not given you permission to die. Since youve gone against your Kings order, I am going to punish you.


    Ah, uh


    Ahh, Donna. Despite biting off your own tongue, youve not been given the luxury of death. You must have heard it wrong. No matter how much you try to bite it off, you cant die that way. You must have wanted to die, too, thats why you had bitten your tongue. I should have killed you first, with my own hands. Why have you continued to live longer, why are you part of this story Why has ite to this.


    Will you help me?


    Gueuze took one of the many tools lined up on the walls, then brought it in front of Carynne.


    It was a small dagger.


    Again, it had a needlessly gold hilt and was unnecessarily adorned with colorful gemstones. Its really like that.


    Carynne knew that this was nothing but a harmless ornament.


    You want me to stab her?


    Yes.


    Why?


    After saying she did not love me, Catherine eventually left me. She didnt even try to understand me.


    But you. Youll understand me if you do the same things Ive done.


    Your Highness.


    Its pretty fun, you know.


    Her heart started beating strangely. She wondered if it was because she hated the situation she was in now, or if its because she was delighted by it.


    After all, didnt she want to be a murderer in this life?


    Still, the weapon in front of her had no de.


    Carynne took the dagger and brought a finger against its edge, but her skin was unscathed. With a question swimming behind her eyes, she nced up at Crown Prince Gueuze, who smiled back.


    If its sharp, it would hardly feel like punishment to her. Rather, youd just be helping her.


    So, he was asking her to stab Donna to death with a blunt weapon, over and over and over again.


    Carynne gripped the dagger in her hand.


    Then, she looked up and locked eyes with Donna.


    Tom must have looked at Carynne like that, too.


    * * *


    Sir Raymond, is your mind idling away now?


    I apologize, Marquis.


    Raymond bowed slightly towards Marquis Penceir. In his impatience, he got caught. Raymond fixed his gloves again.


    All the crucial work was done. There was no more danger. The assembly members and the nobles had all concurred. Crown Prince Gueuze could no longer pose a threat to Raymond.


    Still, his unease remained. He couldnt pinpoint where this uneasiness wasing from. Raymond looked down and stared at his gloves.


    He shouldnt feel this way. Theres no need to feel anxious at all. Raymonds life had always been full of uncertainties, and it was rare for things to work out as smoothly as it was going now.


    It was so sudden, but its something that should have been done in the first ce. I hope you understand.


    Marquis Penceir chattered away. Being so used to being deployed frequently, even in the middle of the night, Raymond was baffled anyhow. This in itself must be a joke.


    Raymond went out on official business, and Marquis Penceir went along with him. Apart from the marquis, a total of eight more carriages full of escort knights and the marquis troops had followed. So, Raymond had nothing to fear. They werent even going to the battlefield. And, in the end, it all ended well.


    Its over.


    His work concluded with sess. He was here with the marquis in a carriage, sitting peacefully as they drank some tea and celebrated. Raymond was somewhat surprised at howfortable the carriage was, unlike when he rode the train a while back. Its more ufortable to ride most carriagespared to the train, but since this was a marquis carriage, thefort one could feel inside it was no different than the drawing room of a mansion. Now that its over, he should rx.


    This is just the beginning. You did a great job, in many ways.


    Thank you, Marquis, for all your help.


    Raymond replied with a smile, but hints of doubt could be seen from it.


    The marquis asked.


    Are you feeling nervous about getting married?


    It was a question asked with the purpose of making him loosen up, but to some extent, the marquis had hit the nail on the head. Raymond got caught being antsy. He had prepared as thoroughly as he could, but he was feeling uneasy because <i>she</i> wasnt in front of him.


    Whenever she was away from his side, wonderfully enough, Carynne had a talent in making enemies here and there.


    He could only hope that she had caused only something minor, like another womans envy, but the enemies that Carynne had gained thus far were people like Verdic Evans and Crown Prince Gueuze.


    It felt as if Raymonds strength had seeped out of him somewhat.


    Still. Its alright now.

 Chapter 121

    Chapter 121


    Yes, Im a little nervous.


    Id like to say the same thing, but honestly, I hadnt been nervous at all, so I have nothing to say.


    I see.


    I said it only to make you smile somehow.


    Raymond then tried to give a small smile, but it was toote. The marquis waved one hand to brush it off, then he moved onto the next topic.


    As for your wedding, it might be a little difficult for me to attend.


    Is that so?


    Mmh. Theres a lot of things I must prepare for as well. Still, Ill make sure to send gifts that wont disappoint you.


    Raymonds expression was still stiff, thats why the marquis brought this up on purpose, but rather than lightening up, the mood seemed to have hardened even further.


    Raymond did not usually show his true feelings in front of the marquis. Or perhaps it was because of the topic he chose to bring up?


    The marquis probed.


    Is it because of your fiance? Its Catherines daughter, correct?


    Yes, thats right. Did you know her?


    The marquis stroked his chin.


    There was a time that I tried to pursue her. Does she look like her mother?


    Im not quite sure as Ive never met the Madam, but everyone else says that she looks just like my fiance. Some say that shes even more beautiful.


    At this, the marquisughed. Nheless, he insisted onmenting on yet another thing.


    She must be pretty.


    Yes.


    Raymond answered briefly. Carynne was certainly pretty.


    The marquis leaned in slightly and spoke with a slightly teasing tone.


    And Im sure she brought up some strange things, too. Is she also obsessed with true love?


    Yes. How do you know?


    Raymond felt a little antsy. Just as he had expected, Carynnes illness was hereditary.


    However, the marquis expression was not so grim. As he leaned back once more, he spoke.


    Yes, well, thats also one of her charms, but Its quite a peculiar charm.


    The marquisughed jovially.


    Raymond had to wonder if the deceased Lady Catherine was a strange person like Carynne. Or was it because Marquis Penceir and Lady Catherine werent very close, thats why he didnt know?


    If shes that pretty, shed still look attractive no matter whats in her head.


    It seemed like its thetter.


    With a hint of displeasure in his tone, Raymond warned the marquis.


    Marquis, youre talking about my soon-to-be wifes mother.


    Frightening. Anyway, she was charming. It had been refreshing to have heard her say that she wanted only one love of her life.


    Arent most women like that?


    The marquis raised one finger and wagged it in disagreement.


    Will you marry only for love?


    Yes.


    Raymond replied. He would marry only for love. Raymond thought that marriage was something that couldnt be done only when there was no love between the two people involved.


    Haha, thats really funny.


    Since things turned out well, he seemed to be in a good mood.


    So thats possible, too. Raymond was bewildered by the urgentmand that was handed down to him from the royal pce. It wasnt like he didnt expect it, but right now, Raymond was really about to retire.


    He had already delegated most of his work, and he had returned his state-issued guns. With the situation that he was in right now, it would be difficult to say that he was still a soldier.


    In any case, she had some odd sides to her, but I still liked her. And even after she got married to Hare, I still wished to be friends with her. It had been impossible though since she was no longer in high society. Make sure not to do that after you get married, alright? If your wife will keep staying at home, the annoying problem of children wille soon after.


    I see.


    Honestly, I didnt expect that shed choose Hare. Right, it seems like she really married just for love. There were more men around herricher, higher-rankingbut Hare was still the one she chose. Well, hes not a bad match for a woman. Hare was pretty good-looking as well.


    Raymond recalled Crown Prince Gueuze. Hes an obsessed man.


    At first, Raymond thought that Crown Prince Gueuze, who was like a thorn at Raymonds side, was just trying to use Carynne as a tool of revenge against Raymond. However, the crown princes obsession ran deeper and even worse than that.


    Did Crown Prince Gueuze ask for Lady Catherines hand in marriage as well? Is that why hes so obsessed with Carynne?


    What? Haha.


    At Raymonds words, Marquis Penceir started guffawing.


    In response, Raymond felt a little flustered.


    Ahem, right. Sorry. Give me a second.


    Did I speak out of turn?


    The marquis shook his head.


    I know that you love your fiance very much. Right. She must be breathtakingly lovely. But her mother, Catherine, hails from a counts household. Whereas Crown Prince Gueuze is the heir to the throne.


    But Madam Catherines maternal grandmother was Grand Duchess Catryn, so Im under the impression that her status wouldnt be that far off.


    Raymonds face turned a little red.


    Even if shes Grand Duchess Catryns granddaughter, the problem lies with Catherines mother. Shes Countess Cailyn, if you know her. Really, their maternal lineage married too much for love. As much as they wanted to choose for themselves, their daughters would have more limited options because of that.


    I see.


    Still, I guess its not unprecedented, so Crown Prince Gueuze might have proposed to Catherine with the resolve to give up his right to the throne. But he didnt.


    How do you know?


    I know. His Highness Gueuze once talked to me about it.


    Marquis Penceir was a close rtive of Gueuze. Even if they were rivals in love with Catherine, they werent serious rivals. Marquis Penceir was a pragmatic man.


    He said that hed let Catherine marry the right man, thenter make her his mistress.


    Ha.


    Right. Even if shes a counts daughter, shes still a grand duchess granddaughter. With pedigree like that, do you think shed choose to be a whore? She wouldnt have tolerated the thought.


    I see.


    But Gueuze likely didnt want to give up the throne either. Actually, it wouldnt make any senseto give up the throne just for a lover.


    <i>Knock, knock.</i>


    Someone knocked on the window of the carriage. Raymond reached over and opened the window.


    Whats going on?


    Sir Raymond, theres a problem.


    The first person who was addressed was Raymond instead of the Marquis.


    And Raymond had a hunch on what had happened.


    Carynne.


    Weve been contacted that Lady Carynne is missing.


    * * *


    Carynne threw the dagger n the floor.


    No.


    Its not anything worth thinking about.


    All Gueuze would be able to offer Carynne was death. Perhaps torture as well, perhaps rape, too. Carynne has had enough of it all.


    Shed rather stop at one person ckmailing her, and that was Dun. After all, what hes dangling at her was the method to the true death that she could achieve in the future.


    I dont want to do it.


    If Carynne would kill, then it would be a kill for herself, not someone else. She did not want to do anything that would conform to Crown Prince Gueuzes desires.


    What she wanted to do was to live her own way.


    Even if its at the risk of her own life.


    Hmm, how unexpected.


    I thought youd understand me.


    How would I be able to understand Your Highness?


    Watching Carynne stand defiant against him, Crown Prince Gueuze bent down to pick up the de-less dagger. He did not look too displeased, however somethings odd.


    Crown Prince Gueuze asked.


    Didnt you kill Lord Hare, your father?


    Is there any evidence pointing towards that conclusion? Your Highness has mentioned it before, that you do not have any evidence.


    Crown Prince Gueuze pressed a finger over Carynnes mouth. The corners of his eyes were bent.


    Good grief, what you said just now is evidence enough. It seems like youre not used to it yet.


    If Carynne was a truly innocent person, she wouldnt have mentioned theck of evidence. She would have just said, No, I did not kill him. Only the culprit would contest theck of evidence, for that very suspect would know whether there was evidence left behind or not.


    After Crown Prince Gueuze pointed this out, Carynne bit her lower lip.


    If you start to get a little more used to killing people, youll be able to hide them more naturally.


    I do not know what youre talking about.


    With a disbelieving expression, Crown Prince Gueuze answered.


    With a position like mine, I tend to get a hold of many different kinds of information. Why are you still being so staunch in the midst of all this? Is it because you believe in Sir Raymond?


    Thats probably not the case.


    I


    Carynne knew that, despite everything, Raymond chose her, but she still could not believe in himpletely.


    Because, even if she was by Raymonds side, she kept dying.


    Carynne did not owe an exnation to Crown Prince Gueuze, however.


    I dont know.


    Did he interpret her ambiguous answer as a yes? Crown Prince Gueuze narrowed his eyes and turned his back on her.


    Carynne clutched the dagger tighter and stared at his neck.


    If she were to stab him right in the neck No, theres no de on this dagger. She wouldnt be able to kill him with one stroke. If she attempted to do so, shed immediately be subdued by him. Then, she would be one of the many ornaments on the wall.


    Vividly, Carynne could imagine what the process would be like.


    <i>t/n: Im not very sure if its a mistake on the authors part, but when the grand duchess had been mentioned before, her name was Ca, but its Catryn here instead.</i>

 Chapter 122

    Chapter 122


    I sent you a gift, yes?


    Donnas arm.


    I wish to present you with another one. Im looking forward to seeing how youll react to it.


    He pointed out one box to show Carynne.


    Would it be Donnas leg next? However, considering what Crown Prince Gueuze was pointing at right now, it didnt seem like its going to be a leg.


    Carynne didnt even notice that it was there until now, but there was a chest over at that corner there. It was a lot bigger than the first chest.


    As if in a trance, Carynne stood in front of the chest.


    Open it.


    Crown Prince Gueuze handed the key to Carynne. The chest itself was chained and fastened with a lock.


    She pushed the key into the lock and turned it. <i>Rattle</i>. Then, she lifted the heavy lid with both her hands.


    Amidst the darkness of the chest, the gift was revealed.


    * * *


    His Highness Prince Lewis and Miss Carynne are both missing.


    * * *


    Prince Lewis, son of Crown Prince Gueuze, was inside the chest.


    Carynne stared down at the young prince.


    Are you not entertained?


    Gueuzeughed.


    Hes breathing. His chest was slowly going up and down.


    Prince Lewis was not yet dead. And unlike Donna, his arms and legs were all unscathed. His clothes were rumpled here and there, and he had a few cuts and bruises.


    Carynne closed her eyes for a moment, then she opened them again to nce down at the young prince.


    Your Highness, I cannot fathom the depths of your thoughts I am young and immature, so I am still unwise.


    What did the crown prince just do?


    Why did he bring his own son to this ce? Crown Prince Gueze was not very fond of his son, that much was something many people knew. The reason the old king was still holding out without ever abdicating the throne was because hes intending to hand it over directly to the well-behaved Prince Lewis instead of Crown Prince Gueuze. Thats why Crown Prince Gueuze hates his son.


    With the way things are Your Highness wont gain anything from this at all.


    Still, the current king was too old now.


    He was already at the age that even moving was too difficult for him. A character who was not too far from Carynnes true age, that was the king.


    She had seen his face only from afar before, but she knew that it wouldnt be strange if hed drop dead any time now, considering his age.


    Crown Prince Gueuze was a son who the old king siredte in life, and likewise, Crown Prince Gueuze had also sired Prince Lewis a littlete in life. No matter how long the current king would try to hold on, it was unlikely that hed be able to hand over the throne directly to his grandson.


    Are humans driven to action only for the sake of gaining something?


    Nevertheless, there was an extent and a reason behind it.


    Carynne turned to look at him. She could not understand Crown Prince Gueuze himself.


    Humans have various motivations. Even more so when one bes king.


    But, at the end of the day, the fact that Crown Prince Gueuze had sired Prince Lewis was the very thing that solidified his stake at the throne.


    The upper-ranking nobles who had noble blood, who were around the same age as Gueuze, had yet to birth any sons like Prince Lewis. Even if Crown Prince Gueuze loathes to admit it, the young prince was a boon to him. Even if you say that hes already middle-aged, yet <i>still</i> just the heir to the throne.


    Prince Lewis was a child siredte. Additionally, the crown princess had been quite dead for some time now. The more children that a member of the royal family had sired, the more secure their future would be. Since the next in line would eventually need to pass on the throne to their children as well, the more bright and strong children this next in line had, the more reliably theyd befit the throneespeciallypared to a member of the royal family who did not have children.


    That being said, Prince Lewis'' existence was also what actively strengthened Crown Prince Gueuzes throne. Prince Lewis would need to live on.


    You really dont know?


    Crown Prince Gueuze grabbed Carynnes shoulder.


    Carynne knew. Gueuze wasnt considering the pros and cons when it came to killing Lewis.


    She knew how much Crown Prince Gueuze hates Prince Lewis.


    So, hes going to kill Prince Lewis.


    Despite all the benefits he would gain from the child.


    And, with reasons that Carynne would not understand.


    This man did not bring his son here on impulse.


    <i>Rustle.</i>


    At that moment, Prince Lewis moved. He woke up after hearing Crown Prince Gueuzes voice.


    Father?


    Inside the box, Prince Lewis opened his eyes, then he reached up to grab the edge of the chesthis hands were not tied. He blinked his eyes. It didnt seem like hes fully recovered.


    Carynne lent a hand to help him. Prince Lewis rubbed his head and frowned.


    This ce, just what is this


    Your Highness, pleasee to your senses.


    Perhaps it would be better for her to let go, but Carynne grabbed Prince Lewis, thinking that he might scream. Her ears would hurt if he were to scream.


    Prince Lewis then held Carynnes arm with force. Then, his eyes went wide.


    He finally saw it, too.


    That Wha-what?


    Prince Lewis stumbled back into the box after seeing the ornaments on the walls.


    Father right now those things


    In response, Crown Prince Gueuze just shrugged as he looked down at his son, who couldnt string two words together. The father seemed to be thinking that his son was overreacting.


    Too weak.


    Crown Prince Gueuze muttered as he watched the boy from behind. Prince Lewis reaction was much more rationalpared to Carynnes, however its as if its still not enough for him. In fact, its like Crown Prince Gueuze would hate Prince Lewis no matter how hed react anyway.


    As expected, you dont resemble me. Not a single thing about me.


    Seeing as how Prince Lewis did not lose consciousness, he was able to get up this time, with Carynnes help. Prince Lewis took a deep breath. He tried to collect himself somehow.


    Father, what exactly is the meaning of all this?


    Barely getting up on his feet, Prince Lewis looked straight at his father, though the boys hands were shaking. Apparently, he was trying to re at his father, but this adolescent boy did not seem to have any strength left in his body. He looked like he wanted to just lose consciousness again.


    Isnt it obviously for fun?


    I dont understand what youre saying. Father, what are all those things hanging over there? Father, where is this ce?


    Dont feign ignorance.


    Father.


    Didnt you already know about this room?


    Crown Prince Gueuze held Prince Lewis by his shoulders. Then, he lifted his son. The crown prince easily picked up his son and lifted from the chest.


    Tell me, why did you contact Raymond Saytes?


    Because he is an ideal knight. Father, let me go. This This isnt right.


    <i>Tak.</i>


    Prince Lewis was dropped to the floor. Gueuze stared down at his son. However, the violence done unto him seemed to have awakened Prince Lewis resolve. He got up from the floor, his teeth clenched.


    Father, please turn yourself in. Its not toote.


    Look at this, Carynne.


    Crown Prince Gueuze averted his gaze from Prince Lewis, then he looked at Carynne. While maintaining eye contact with her, he asked herthough his voice now had a gentle tone, unlike when he was talking to his son.


    By any chance, did you put your hopes on my son?


    Carynne couldnt very well answer, I didnt think that far.


    Prince Lewis had made a pledge to Raymond, saying that he would be sure to actively protect Carynne. But right now, the knight was not here, and the young prince himself did not have any weapons to beat his father with.


    Looking towards the boy, Carynne could see only a child who was much smaller and thinner than herself. Evidently, it seemed like the boy needed to protect himself rather than someone else.


    Father!


    I wasnt talking to you!


    Crown Prince Gueuze shouted at Prince Lewis. Then, he turned sharply towards Carynne.


    Can you love me?


    Right, seems impossible.


    Crown Prince Gueuze brought one foot over Prince Lewis right then. Prince Lewis curled into himself.


    Stay still. Its going to be okay.


    Was he saying that to Carynne or to Prince Lewis?


    F-Father. Please stop. Im not the only one who knows about this. Other people know.


    Did you tell?


    Father, please let Carynne Evans go. Please ask for forgiveness from Grandfather, and please repent for your sins, I beg of you.


    Goodness. His Majesty already knows the existence of this room. Even so, hes left me alone thus far, hasnt he?

 Chapter 123

    Chapter 123


    Prince Lewis raised his head. He red at his father.


    Grandfather wouldnt do that.


    And he strongly denied what his father had just said.


    Crown Prince Gueuze stepped on Prince Lewis hand. Even without doing this, the middle-aged man could very well overpower the boy, but it seemed like his loathing for the boy was urging his actions.


    After bing king, you tend to ignore trivial things. His Majesty, too, has had many hobbies.


    Father Please dont speak of Grandfather with such sphemy. If you keep saying such things


    Did His Majesty promise to make you the next king?


    Prince Lewis hesitated a little before he answered.


    Father, something like this would not bode you well at all. Please stop at once.


    This offended Crown Prince Gueuze.


    As expected, youre like that.


    Crown Prince Gueuze took a scabbard that was hanging high up on the wall, and out from the scabbard was yet another sword. Its only obvious that it was another beautiful and luxurious sword.


    However, when the sword was pulled out of its scabbard, a high-pitched sound apanied it. Carynne realized that this was apletely different depared to the dagger.


    This de had a sharp edge.


    Holding the sword, Crown Prince Gueuze turned.


    <i>Ta-dak, ta-dak, ta-dak.</i>


    I detest His Majesty.


    Father!


    Then, other sets of footsteps could be heard from a distance. Carynne turned to Crown Prince Gueuze and told him.


    Your Highness, please stop. I can hear other peopleing.


    Carynne spoke urgently. It might not be toote. Raymond might havee this time again. He might go through those doors and stop Crown Prince Gueuze, save the young prince and save Carynne as well.


    Haha, you think Id believe that?


    Crown Prince Gueuze answered Carynne without even looking at her face. Right now, it seemed like all he wanted to do was to turn his son into an ornament on the wall. The de glinted. Carynne spoke up once more.


    I really am hearing it!


    Carynne cried out. Footsteps were approaching. Crown Prince Gueuze turned his head.


    Would hee again this time? She could hear footsteps. Heavy footsteps. Would Raymonde to save Carynne again this time?


    Your Highness, please stop.


    Maybe its not toote. In this life, Raymond had proposed to Carynne. He confessed that he loves her. Even if he did not believe Carynne. Maybe.


    Come in.


    The door opened.


    Your Highness, I have prepared the bath as you ordered.


    It was not Raymond.


    It was Crown Prince Gueuzes assistant, who Carynne had met before.


    This time, its likely that Raymond would be toote.


    Just like this life so far. Disappointment dawned upon Carynne faster than expected.


    However, while Carynne was filled with dismay, Prince Lewis eyes werepletely dyed with despair.


    The boy cried out to the attendant in a hurry.


    Look here! You, what are you doing right now! Why have you not reported the existence of this room!


    Prince Lewis shouting made the attendant turn slowly, and he blinked his eyes as though perplexed.


    Goodness, youre here, Your Highness Lewis? What should I have reported?


    Get out.


    Crown Prince Gueuze cut off the attendant right there. And the attendant immediately cowered back.


    I apologize, Your Highness.


    Still, there was a smile ever present on the attendants lips. Therge attendant grinned at Prince Lewis and Carynne.


    Carynne, I thought you might need to freshen up a little, so I ordered for a bath to be drawn for you.


    And first, Ill need to take care of this.


    The tip of the sword was turned towards Prince Lewis once again. At this, Prince Lewis face turned white.


    Father, what are you talking about?


    Let me give you a piece of advice. Its good to wash your body first before sleeping with a woman. Well, you dont need to know that now. Shh, dont move.


    Without turning his head, Crown Prince Gueuze ordered the attendants behind him.


    Dont open that door until morning.


    Yes, Your Highness.


    <i>ck. </i>The sound of the door being locked outside resounded once more.


    Crown Prince Gueuze looked back at Carynne and Prince Lewis.


    Are you looking forward to it?


    Prince Lewis was gnashing his teeth. Tears had formed around his eyes. He couldnt endure anymore. Crown Prince Gueuze looked down at Prince Lewis, pointing the sword at the boy.


    To be honest, Carynne, I wanted to do it with you. Ah. No, not the bath. Im talking about something else.


    But this here, Im sure youll be quite fond of it as well. Youll get used to it.


    Then, Gueuze spoke to Prince Lewis.


    Lewis, did His Majesty say that you will be the next king?


    With tears in his eyes, Prince Lewis red back at Crown Prince Gueuze. Through his gritted teeth, a groan leaked through. Nevertheless, this was what he said:


    Thats right. You lunatic.


    I see.


    <i>Stab.</i>


    AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!


    Prince Lewis screamed. Gueuze had stabbed Prince Lewis in the thigh. And, still, he continued to push the de in.


    But His Majesty would not be able to give up on me if <i>youre</i> gone.


    Ugh uuuhk u-aaack


    You will not be the next king. His Majesty is really too much. Dont me me, now. This is all your fault. Ive never thought of you as my son. In the first ce, you shouldnt have been born.


    Crown Prince Gueuze raised his sword again.


    And he aimed at Prince Lewis other thigh.


    A human being has two legs. Amongst all its parts, I most prefer stabbing the thigh. Its a good part to stab into if you take blood loss into ount. The neck and the wrist are both good spots as well, but only if youpletely cut them off.


    Ah, aaaah, ahk


    Now, with this, you will never walk again. But your legs look fine, dont they? Still, you wont ever be able to run. Now then, Lewis. How do you feel? What do you think about having an ornament upon your body? How does it feel to have apletely useless part of your body?


    Prince Lewis began to froth at the mouth.


    Good grief, I never allowed you to faint.


    What kind of face should a parent have whilst receiving his childs head? Oh, Im curious about how His Majesty will react as well. Maybe hell give me the crown soon Well, actually, even if I receive it now, its already toote.


    Crown Prince Gueuze swung his sword once more.


    Keuaaaaaack!


    However, the person who screamed next wasnt Prince Lewis.


    It was Crown Prince Gueuze.


    This This lowly!


    Donna crawled with one arm and one leg, then went on to bite Crown Prince Gueuzes leg. Donnas teeth did not help her as she had attempted to take her own life, however, they were still strong enough to pierce through Crown Prince Gueuzes pants and mp down on his flesh.


    Of course, that was all. Biting someones leg had only fueled his ire. Its not enough to stop him.


    Crown Prince Gueuze turned to Donna.


    You goddamn bitch.


    Carynne knew. This time, Raymond would be toote.


    As always, at the very end, he would either be toote, or he would fail. So, Carynne would die, and die, and die.


    This time again, she would die.


    If so


    * * *


    Crown Prince Gueuze heard her approach from behind him. But he didnt really care. He even thought that Carynne would help him get this woman off his leg. That she would help him kill the bitch. He didnt know why such a vague belief suddenly came about.


    Hurry up and take care of this!


    Of course, it was all just his delusion.


    Carynne was not Catherine. Crown Prince Gueuze felt something cold pressing against his back. For a moment, he thought that it was the dagger. But no, the dagger was already on the floor right now.


    Whats pressing behind him now was a heeled shoe.


    Carynne kicked Crown Prince Gueuzes back heel-first. At this, he lost his bnce and copsed to the ground. He tried to get up again, but he couldnt because Donna was still hanging from his leg.


    As he was face-first on the ground, Carynne stepped on his back, then she hung her ne around his neck. Pearls soon scattered on the floor.


    Keuugh


    Crown Prince Gueuze started to thrash around. However, Carynnes shoe was pressed firmly against his back, so it was impossible for him to get up. And, Donna was keeping him pinned to the ground with her remaining arm. He tried to kick her off of him, however, Donna persistently held him down.


    The ne continued to dig into Crown Prince Gueuzes neck.


    Keu, uhh, uuugh.


    Using her whole body, Carynne pulled the ne tighter as it was on his neck. Crown Prince Gueuzes fingers struggled to pull it off him, however it would not.


    This was the ne that Carynne made especially with suicide in mind. Even if Gueuze tried to escape, he would not be able to take off the string that had already dug into his neck.


    Its alright, Your Highness.


    Uhk, uuugh.


    Itll be alright, so you can stop now.


    He could hear the young womans sweet whispers in his ear. The same voice as the woman hed been yearning for all these years. Yet, in the voice that he was hearing now, only venom could be heard <i>drip, drip </i>dripping into his ear. If he didnt listen carefully, he wouldnt have heard it.


    Ah, aahh


    Shh

 Chapter 124

    Chapter 124


    His eyes rolled all the way back to show only their whites. Crown Prince Gueuze tried desperately to pull the ne off, his fingers hooked beneath the string, and kicked his feet relentlessly. However, the more he struggled, the tighter the ne dug upon his neck.


    Uhk.


    With that final groan, <i>thud</i>, went the man as he copsed to the ground.


    <i>Tak.</i>


    Crown Prince Gueuze stopped struggling. He fell forward.


    Its all over.


    The one and only crown prince of the kingdom, a middle-aged man who was supposed to be king, a serial killer, a rapist, and a man who loved Catherine, Carynnes mother.


    Yousted longer than Father.


    After he had struggled for such a long time, Crown Prince Gueuze finally stopped moving, and so Carynne slowly let go of the ne. There was a deeply engraved mark of the string on her hand, too.


    I changed the nes string with an organs string.


    Actually, it would have been much easier to kill you with a scarf than this thing. But rather than that, there arent many other things that are morefortable. Poison would have been good, but I made the mistake of not bringing any because I was summoned here in such a hurry, right? Well, even if I gave you a ss to drink, you probably wouldnt have taken it.


    Carynne shook her hands.


    My hands hurt.


    Carynne used one heeled shoe to turn Crown Prince Gueuzes face upside down, pressing down on his cheek with her foot. This simple act would have been enough to apprehend her with the crime of contempt against the royal family.


    Since youre already so old, you should have refrained from being too greedy.


    Crown Prince Gueuze died with his eyes still open. His eyes had turned red after his veins had burst, and there was drool trickling out of his mouth.


    It was an unsightly death.


    Gracious.


    Carynne looked down at her bloodied hands. They both hurt. As Crown Prince Gueuze was thrashing around earlier, he had torn the skin off Carynnes hands. The wounds looked like theyd leave scars.


    Looking down at her stinging hands, she sighed. In this iteration, her hands had already gotten so ragged because of manualbor, but there would now be scars, too.


    It hurts.


    Carynne grimaced, then she turned to the boy. There was a pool of blood around his lower body. After fixing the shoes on her feet, she called out to Prince Lewis.


    Your Highness Lewis?


    There was no answer.


    Carynne purposefully stepped on Crown Prince Gueuze as she approached the young prince.


    Prince Lewis was lying down with his eyes closed. Blood flowed constantly from both his legs. Carynne suddenly felt a slight jolt go through her.


    Your Highness?


    She ced her ear close to his chest. She couldnt hear his breaths either.


    He already passed away. Theres no hope for him now.


    Ah. Ahh?


    At the other side, Donna began to groan. Carynne raised her head and took in a better look at the room.


    Im going crazy.


    This time again, Raymond waste, Carynne waste, all the heirs to the royal throne were dead. Yet again, this time, its over.


    In a situation like this, a happy ending was nigh impossible.


    <i>I hate myself. I hate this situation.</i>


    Carynne stood up.


    Haa.


    As she looked at Crown Prince Gueuze and Prince Lewis, she sighed. Then, she found Donna.


    She made up her mind.


    It should have been like this from the beginning. This life had taken her out on such a confusing spin. Right now, its time to set everything straight.


    Did she or did she not decide that she would walk down the path of a murderer who killed for her own entertainment?


    Just as when she killed Nancy, just as when she had chopped up Thomas, just as when she shot Missus Deere.


    Whether innocent or guilty, did she not decide that she wouldnt think of her killings as a sin?


    Fall in love, sincerely.


    In that case.


    I will help you.


    In the end, the most important thing to her it was not in this life.


    I can find it in the next one.


    Carynne took Crown Prince Gueuzes sword and held it up.


    As she lifted it herself, she realized that it was heavier than she had expected. Still, she liked the feeling of cold metal in her hands.


    And above all, it was a beautiful de. Carynne quite liked it.


    With one hand, she held the hem of her dresss skirt. With the other hand, she propped the sword up.


    <i>Tak.</i>


    Carynnes footsteps turned towards Donna.


    Donna looked at Carynne. Carynne, too, looked at Donna.


    Carynne raised the de higher. Donnas eyes went wide.


    Donna.


    Holding the sword, Carynne came closer to Donna.


    Youre in a lot of pain, arent you?


    Clumsily, she swung the sword once, and as the de cut through the air, the wind sang. After she swung like that, Prince Lewis blood was flung off.


    She stared at the swords newly glimmering de. Its a great piece of craftsmanship.


    Carynne approached Donna and began to exin. She wants to be nicer to her. She didnt know why thoughwhy exactly did she have such a strong sense of duty to kill Donna, even from a while back?


    Maybe I just Maybe if I had just waited for Raymond. Maybe I just shouldnt have left my room. Maybe Oh, I dont know. During this iteration, I was neither one nor the other. I said I wanted to be apletely murderous killer, but then I got swayed by Dun and Gueuze And Raymond, too. Hes the same in this iteration. Just. What the hell is this.


    Donnas eyes were wide open. She opened her mouth.


    In any case, this life is hopeless.


    She struggled to move with one hand, one leg. However, she couldnt possibly go far with just two limbs.


    With tears in her eyes, Carynne approached the other girl. Shes crying. Then, as if to console Donna, Carynne leaned in closer to her.


    Its alright, Donna. Itll be over soon.


    Ah.


    Its alright now. Let me help you.


    She raised the sword.


    We can start again.


    Thats why


    Its alright.


    * * *


    Raymond was certain that Carynne was crazy. Its for this reason that he could love her whole-heartedly. He went to Dun to, once again, confirm Carynnes insanity. Though it was not for the purpose of solidifying his resolve.


    Why did youe to me?


    Carynne is crazy. Isnt that right?


    As a doctor and as a priest, Raymond wanted him to prove it.


    Raymond asked this question to Dun. It was not just for the sake offort.


    He exined.


    Just in case Carynnes past is revealed.


    She, has notmitted any sins.


    Ill take your word for it. But Carynnes mental state is extremely unstable, so theres no telling how Verdic Evans will find fault in this.


    T-This


    As a priest and as a doctor, I ask that you testify. Please make a written ount and sign your name there.


    Thereafter, Raymond formally asked Dun to write this down: Carynnes mind is extremely unstable, so its of his opinion that she must be left under her familys protection, and medical care is also needed.


    Are you satisfied with this?


    Raymond read the document carefully. If Raymond did not love Carynne, Carynne wouldnt ever be able toe out of an insane asylum for the rest of her life.


    Yes, thank you.


    Of course, Raymond had no intention of sending Carynne to an asylum. A ce like that was rather where youd send your enemies. Most of the treatment thats done in that kind of institution was nothing more than torture in the guise of correcting the patients.


    Its not a ce where youd send your family. Raymond was confident that hed be able to take care of Carynne for life. Through brute force, through money, whatever the method.


    Dun was about to get up now, but Raymond had onest thing to ask.


    I have a question.


    W-What is it?


    Why did you lie to Carynne like that?


    Raymond was curious about that. In his perspective, its not something that an exemry doctor would have done.


    The world outside the novel that she speaks ofits not real.


    As Raymond thought of the efforts he had made thus far, he frowned a little. As expected, its all futile.


    I tried. Its about how Carynne says that she lives the same life over and over, and that shees from outside a novel. How she believes that if she achieves true love, she will return to her original world.


    Raymond truly tried. Never once did he believe what Carynne said, but nheless, he tried to believe her.


    In the end, however, its just too unbelievable.


    I talked to professors of linguistics, physics and theology. Of course I couldnt tell them about the supposed different world, but I asked for their opinion about ones anxiety over believing that they might be from another country.


    At Raymonds exnation, Dun let out a weakugh, thinking that it was quite funny.


    You did something like that?


    Yes. Of course, everyoneughed. They said that Carynnes ent and all of her knowledge couldnt possibly belong to another countrys culture.


    Raymond went on to ask Dun.


    Why does Carynne believe that shes from another world?


    And Dun replied.


    For the sake of c-cforting herself, its one kind of cure. Its possible to mend oneself from the idea of the afterlife.


    * * *


    Once everyones dead, silence prevailed.


    Carynne gasped for air.


    Surely, this will get me the death penalty.


    Still, its alright.


    Its possible to start over.


    * * *


    Sir Raymond, youre toote.

 Chapter 125: 06. Judgment

    Chapter 125: 06. Judgment


    Crown Prince Gueuze was the kings son.


    Nothing else was more important than this fact.


    What Crown Prince Gueuze looked like, what his voice sounded like, what kind of food he likednone of that really mattered.


    And, even if he had the quaint hobby of killing people, its simply nothing of consequencepared to the fact that he was the kings son.


    Of course, with his pedigree in mind, it also wasnt all that important what kind of woman he loved.


    I am too old to wee a new queen.


    The king said this when his vassals had suggested that he take in a new queen. And what he said was not wrong. Its true that he had lovers, but no new consorts.


    He did not want to create any rivals for Crown Prince Gueuze.


    However, Your Majesty, it is too dangerous to have just His Highness Gueuze alone. We dont know what might happen in the future.


    Then, shouldnt there be aw properly enacted so that it wouldnt be dangerous? Wasnt it more dangerous to wee a new consort and sire more princes with her?


    No matter how many heirs to the throne there could be, it would never be enough, Your Majesty. Besides that, public opinion is swaying due to Crown Prince Gueuzes predilection of neglecting his studies in favor of seeking carnal pleasures.


    So then, I must <i>create</i>petition for him? Do you mean to say that the next coronation will be after poison and swords are exchanged between brothersyet again?


    No, sire. The mere existence of brothers will be enough to refine His Highness actions.


    Leave. I am done listening.


    Be that as it may, the vassal who told the king all of this was a rtive of the former queen, who was the biological mother of Crown Prince Gueuze.


    The king stroked his chin. Then, he had Crown Prince Gueuze summoned.


    The future of this country rests in your hands. Always be mindful of your actions.


    Who was it that spoke ill of me to Your Majesty?


    Gueuze, I listen to the advice given to me by my vassals. The fact that such words had reached my ears means that a problem has arisen regarding your actions.


    Thats absurd.


    Crown Prince Gueuze replied sardonically.


    The king asked his son about it, but he didnt think that his own words would be refuted like this. Nevertheless, he was still more partial to disciplining Crown Prince Gueuze rather than siring new princes.


    Instead of thinning it out across several princes, it was better to concentrate your all on one person and hand over all power to him when the timees.


    If you continue to act that way, who will be there to trust and support you?


    Im going to be king anyway, who would <i>not</i> support me?


    The king nced down at his son.


    Silence stretched before them.


    Taking notice of the kings thoughts, Crown Prince Gueuze knelt before him.


    That was imprudent of me. I will do my best.


    And so, Crown Prince Gueuze grew up amid some anxiety and doubts about him. There were criticisms against his arrogance, but this arrogance of his was well warranted. Not anymore was hecking when it came to his studies, and besides that, he had a robust health. His outward appearance, too, was outstanding.


    As he grew older, any mentions of weing a new queen naturally subsided. The king was getting old, and the only prince of the country was healthy, so there was really no choice.


    The crown prince would sometimes assault the servants, or sometimes kill hounds for fun, but none of that was revealed to the public. He also knew how to control himself whenever he was in front of the king.


    Just like that, Crown Prince Gueuzewho was a little cruel, and a little arroganteventually met a woman.


    * * *


    Your Highness, whats the matter?


    Here, they were in the pce garden that was full of red roses.


    As she had been called by Crown Prince Gueuze here, Catherine was sitting in a chair at that garden, wearing a white dress. And, as he was ncing down at her, he said


    I love you, Catherine.


    Crown Prince Gueuze thought that he loved Catherine. Well, thats probably what he thought. He didnt put much meaning to peoples emotions, and he did not tend to share his feelings nor evaluate what they meant.


    However, Crown Prince Gueuze was young, and he wanted Catherine to love himpletely.


    So, in this rose garden, Crown Prince Gueuze confessed straightforwardly to the woman he loved.


    He loved her. This was the obvious truth.


    But I cannot marry you.


    She didnt seem to have expected this. Her violet eyes became subtly unfocused.


    Why is that?


    Catherine bowed her head and quietly asked.


    After seeing her eyes like that, Crown Prince Gueuze felt heartbroken.


    Still, nevertheless, he could not marry her.


    You know why.


    Catherine, you must know it. I am a man destined to be king. And I have to marry someone of royal blood to consolidate my stake at the throne. Its true that your maternal grandmother was thete Grand Duchess Catryn, but your mother married only a count. I love you, but you do not match my rank.


    Your Highness, be frank with me.


    Catherine raised her head again, begging with those wide, doe eyes that looked straight up at Crown Prince Gueuze. Her eyes seemed to be hoping that its not the reason that she was thinking.


    But as he would have to disappoint her, Crown Prince Gueuze pitied her a little.


    There is someone else I have to marry. You know that. Even before I was five years old, Ive been promised to marry that person.


    But you hadnt even held an engagement ceremony.


    Im sorry.


    Dont you love me?


    Thats not the case. Crown Prince Gueuze had never felt the same way towards any other woman as he did towards Catherine.


    He could never bear the ferocity of all those other women, but he was able to be more patient for a longer time in front of Catherine. She was special. Maybe. But that was a different matter altogether.


    I love you. However, marriage is impossible. King Lethuos had pledged ten gold mines in the White Mountain Range and agreed to build a railway from our country to theiron the condition that I marry his daughter So many people can live better lives because of this, and thats whats on the line.


    It was all because he was a man who was to be king. Thats why Catherine <i>had</i> to understand him.


    Wasnt that a given?


    Crown Prince Gueuze exined this to her eagerly, but Catherines expression did not brighten.


    She looked like she could not bear to endure any longer.


    I understand, Your Highness.


    With tears in her eyes, Catherine rose from her seat.


    Please be happy.


    Catherine!


    He caught her hand.


    Your Highness, please let go.


    I cant live without you. I need you.


    There is no ce for me next to you.


    Catherine!


    Was she saying this on purpose? Couldnt she just give him the answer that he wanted to hear?


    Crown Prince Gueuzemented the womans cleverness, and this was what inevitably made him acquiesce first.


    I love you, but we dont have to get married, do we? Marriage is just a formality.


    Your Highness?


    Catherines eyes went wide open, as if she wasnt expecting this at all. She was usually very tactful.


    Crown Prince Gueuze inwardly suppressed his irritation and pleaded.


    You are the only one that I truly love. You know this. Dont leave me.


    Your Highness Youre going to marry someone else. How can I remain by your side?


    I cant go on without you, I really cant. I feel like Im going to die. Please Catherine.


    Your Highness.


    What should he give just to pacify her? What kind of present must he give her?


    Ill give you a pce for you to stay in. I will always sleep there. Ill have my meals there with you, too. But marriageit truly cannot be. I love you, but I carry such an enormous weight on my shoulders.


    Without a word, Catherine looked down at their hands.


    Crown Prince Gueuze had never seen her so quiet. She had always been a chattering woman, like a twittering bird.


    But right now, its as if she had turned into a dollthe mind of which he couldnt read at all.


    But Your Highness, I Me and my future child Will we continue to live as if we are the seed of sin?


    Then let us go to hell together. If you are to sin, then it is my sin as well.

 Chapter 126 Full

    Crown Prince Gueuze hoped that his words would sound reasonable to her. Even so, Catherine wept and did not say anything.


    He gradually grew anxious, and angry because of his anxiety, Catherine slowly opened her lips to speak.


    ��Alright, Your Highness. As long as your heart is with me, then�� I��ll do as you say.��


    As expected, Catherine loved him.


    Crown Prince Gueuze quickly stood up and pulled Catherine into his embrace, kissing her. She resisted a little, but she soon closed her eyes and epted his kiss.


    ��What? Your mistress? I don��t think she��ll ept that. She��s not a prostitute. Better yet, she��s the granddaughter of a Grand Duchess and the daughter of a Count.��


    Marquis Penceir was wrong. Catherine willingly epted Crown Prince Gueuze��s terms because she loved him.


    In the end, did she not say yes?


    ��Thank you for understanding me. Catherine, I love you. Whatever it is that you wish for, I will grant it all for you.��


    Crown Prince Gueuze happily embraced Catherine. Actually, he was somewhat surprised by his own actions. He couldn��t believe he was feeling relieved now. It seemed like he was inwardly anxious about how Catherine might have rejected him with a straight face.


    ��What a useless concern.��


    Was there anyone who would refuse his orders? He was a man set to be this country��s king.


    ��Which one would be good, I wonder.��


    Since he had convinced Catherine sessfully today, he decided toy down the entire n at once.


    ��Yes, whatever you wish. Then, why don��t you marry Hare? Marry him, then immediately start living at the pce.��


    The king��s mistress must be a married woman.


    This country��sws and religion abide by monogamy, but men who had money were free to have as many women as they wanted��what more if it was the king.


    However, only children sired by the king��s legitimate wife would be granted legitimacy, and it��s impossible for an illegitimate child to be given any rights to session. Thus, the king��s mistress must be married to another man.


    ��I����


    ��Yes, my child cannot be illegitimate. You need a fake husband.��


    The right man would be chosen for her to marry. Even if the whole country knows that she��s his other woman, as long as she��s married to someone else, there wouldn��t be a problem when that man would dere their child as his. There��s no way to urately identify whose it really is.


    Never a duke or a marquis. Not even a man who has any semnce of power in the capital. An ordinary man, a weak one. A lowly aristocrat who would not be able to go against a crown prince.


    ��Lord�� Hare����


    ��You don��t want him? Then I��ll give you a count. But he can��t have too much power. I��ll choose other men for you, so you can pick one of them.��


    ����I just����


    Catherine wanted to say something else, but she instead smiled and said,


    ��I will marry the man who Your Highness chooses for me.��


    Crown Prince Gueuze kissed Catherine once more.


    It was the perfect answer that he wanted to hear.


    He prepared everything for Catherine.


    He had a secret room in the basement constructed for her, and it��s connected directly to his own room. He himself would marry another woman and make apulsory heir with her, but every night other than that, he would sleep beside Catherine. So, he gave Catherine the key to his room.


    At the same time as Crown Prince Gueuze��s wedding, Catherine would be exchanging meaningless wedding vows in another church.


    ��My only wife is you. That alone is enough.��


    ��������


    The crown prince��s consort, who hade from another country, was hideous. Crown Prince Gueuze slept with the hard-bodied woman and rolled his hipspulsorily. Then, he immediately put on his clothes once more and left the room straight away.


    This was not the ce where he should be.


    His true wedding would take ce tonight.


    Catherine.


    Catherine.


    The only woman who can understand my darkness.


    ��Catherine!��


    However.


    She was not in the basement.


    Crown Prince Gueuze looked around.


    Not here.


    She��s not here.


    Catherine was definitely supposed to wait for him here.


    ����This.��


    Only a letter written by her was here.


    �� I love Lord Hare. Please do not contact me anymore. ��


    * * *


    Prince Lewis was siredte.


    * * *


    Catherine��s dead.


    * * *


    ��Your Highness, please don��t contact me anymore. Don��t call a summons for me, please.��


    ��You said you love me, Catherine!��


    ��I do not love you.��


    Lord Hare had greeted him at the door.


    ��Your Highness, my wife is not feeling well.��


    ��Bring Catherine here.��


    ��She will not being out.��


    ��I��vee here personally. Call her here.��


    ��She will not being out.��


    ��Are those all the words you know?��


    ��What I know is this, sir. Catherine is sick, and she is not obliged to heed your orders.��


    Crown Prince Gueuze pointed a gun at him.


    Three, two, one.


    BANG!


    ��Uugh����


    ��The next shot will be to your head.��


    Hare copsed to the ground, clutching his leg. However, he steadied himself against the wall and stood up again.


    ��Your Highness. What are you nning to do.��


    ��I will kill you and take Catherine.��


    ��Stop.��


    It was Catherine��s voice.


    She went down the stairs, her violet eyes glinting coldly.


    ��Catherine.��


    ����Your Highness. What have you done to my husband?��


    ��He is not your husband!��


    ��Your Highness personally arranged my marriage with him. And he is the father of my child.��


    Catherine touched her round stomach.


    She��s pregnant.


    The irrefutable evidence of this made Crown Prince Gueuze see red.


    ��You, you, you�� With�� that dirty�� man����


    As though she thought that he was the dirty one here, Catherine looked at him coldly. And she spoke her next words with an exceedingly sharp tone.


    ��Isn��t it natural for a woman to get pregnant if she is married? Go back, Your Highness. The priests shall arrive soon. To bless my pregnancy.��


    ��Catherine.��


    Crown Prince Gueuze grabbed Catherine��by the neck.


    His hands were already clutching her neck tightly before he could even realize what he was doing.


    ��Your Highness Gueuze�� W-What are you doing right now?��


    Behind him, the priests shouted in shock. Realizing other people had seen him, Crown Prince Gueuze rxed his grip.


    ��Catherine!��


    Hare limped hurriedly as he called his wife��s name. Catherine groaned, but the priests came forward to support her.


    ��Go back, Your Highness�� You cannot grant what I want.��


    And so, the years went by. Crown Prince Gueuze endeavored in the expansion of his collection. It was dangerous.


    His father, the current king, did not say much when one or two had disappeared, but as the number increased, his eyes grew colder and colder.


    But even after all that, wasn��t it alright?


    ��Kehehehe!��


    Didn��t her daughter��no, didn��t a young Catherine appear?


    And she was also Raymond��s fianc��e!


    Crown Prince Gueuze despised Raymond. Lewis didn��t resemble the crown prince at all. Really, not one bit. He resembled Raymond more.


    Raymond, who dared to refuse his orders, who dared to show off like that.


    Crown Prince Gueuze was ovee with excitement.


    He must catch her properly this time.


    Although he sometimes made mistakes, the king would cover for him most of the time.


    And people say that the king would be handing the throne to Lewis? Ridiculous. That throne was his.


    Crown Prince Gueuze was an infinitely greedy man.


    Everything was his.


    The throne.


    And Catherine, too.


    ��His Majesty is bound to give in, too.��


    As he was the king��s only son, there��s no other choice.


    * * *


    ��How filthy, seriously.��


    Carynne stomped her shoes on Crown Prince Gueuze��s clothes.


    ��But some good came out of your existence in the end.��


    A decent human rag.

 Chapter 127

    Chapter 127


    * * *


    Not even knowing how he had arrived at his destination, Raymond ran. He pulled one of the horses from the carriage that he was riding, then went straight to the pce. He urged the horse to go faster, <i>faster</i>, but it was toote.


    He crossed the entire city and arrived at the pce, almost getting into an ident several times, but somehow he got there. One of the guards shouted at him.


    Sir Raymond? This is the Royal Pce! There are procedures!


    I heard that Ca His Highness Lewis disappeared!


    Raymond shouted back as he pushed through the guard, whose face turned white the moment he heard those words.


    T-That


    Where are His Highness attendants and escort knights?


    Sir Raymond! What are you doing in this ce!


    Raymond knew that Crown Prince Gueuze was an ill-tempered, cold-blooded andscivious man.


    The culprit is Baron Ein.


    That was what Carynne had said, but Raymond knew that this was not the case.


    However, he had attached a tail on Baron Ein, and he found out that the baron and the crown prince had some kind of deal between them. Raymond managed to coax Baron Ein into confessing about Crown Prince Gueuzes deeds, and he handed the baron over to Marquis Penceir.


    If this gets revealed, even if hes the countrys Crown Prince, he wont be able to get out of this.


    Raymond rushed around here and there for the very purpose of raising Prince Lewis to the throne posthaste.


    None of the higher nobles wanted such a huge matter to be released to the general public. After all, they had blood ties to the royal family. Raymond had to drag the crown prince down as naturally as he could.


    Still, a majority of the Assembly agreed. Such a quick process became possible because Raymond made sure the rumors were spread around, and his likable appearance urged people to listen.


    Theres nothing to fear now.


    Your Highness Lewis.


    All thats left now was to find both Carynne and Prince Lewis alive. He <i>needed</i> to find them somehow. As soon as possible.


    Raymond didnt know how Crown Prince Gueuze found out about it, but Raymond had contacted Prince Lewis to prevent Carynne falling into Crown Prince Gueuzes hands.


    Since Crown Prince Gueuze was obsessed with making Carynne his, Raymond decided on keeping her next to Prince Lewis. He thought that the crown prince wouldnt be able to move recklessly if there were a lot of eyes around.


    However, someone handed Carynne to him. Hes certain that it was someone from inside the countess residence.


    Prince Lewis and his knights went to look for Carynne after Raymond had sent them, and it was then that both the prince and Carynne had disappeared at the same time.


    Gueuze


    Raymond gnashed his teeth.


    Crown Prince Gueuze made his move sooner than Raymond expected. If he already got rid of Prince Lewis, then things would getplicated.


    Please open the door.


    This is His Majesty the Kings chambers, Sir Raymond.


    Tell him that Im here regarding His Highness. His Highness Lewis, His Highness Gueuze and my fiance all went missing at the same time.


    Sir Raymond, no matter how close you are to His Highness Lewis, your actions are uneptable. Go back. Itste, so please go through the proper procedure next time.


    But isnt he His Highness father? The immediate family must be the first to be informed.


    In the middle of that extended argument, Raymond heard someone calling him.


    Sir Raymond,e here.


    Sir Barton.


    It was Sir Barton, the captain of the royal guard. Raymond walked towards him, who ushered the younger man away.


    I know that you must be frantic right now, but youve just ran straight into the pce. Get it together.


    I apologize.


    The king was over the age of ny. And, his condition had been worseningtely. Its even said that he was barely holding on just for the sake of passing the throne to Prince Lewis.


    As all this was going on, people were starting to find it strange why the king would not just hand over the throne to Crown Prince Gueuze.


    You arrived very quickly. It hasnt been long since you sent a messenger.


    Are there still no leads?


    Raymond was nervous.


    Prince Lewis was in his room thest time he was seen.


    Crown Prince Gueuze must have kidnapped him.


    His whereabouts are unounted for as well, but he tended to disappear often. But I do agree with you.


    It would be better to take a look at Crown Prince Gueuzes bedroom first.


    <i>tter.</i>


    The door was locked. Raymond smashed the lock on Crown Prince Gueuzes room. The room was empty.


    Could he have already left the pce?


    Thats possible, but the pce is spacious as well. People are searching every nook and cranny right now. He could be in the garden, or some ce else. If hes not found in one room, the searchers move one to the next.


    Wait a minute.


    As he was standing on the carpeted floor, Raymond tapped with his shoe one part of the floor that sounded slightly different.


    Lets check this first before going.


    The carpet was rolled.


    And, there


    I have a hunch. This


    must be a passageway.


    We dont have the key to it.


    Then lets break it.


    The captain of the royal guard shook his head when Raymond pulled out his gun.


    Its not something that can be broken by a bullet.


    Im not going to shoot it.


    He didnt shoot, but rather, he aimed at the hinges and hit them as much force as he could.


    <i>Thud Thud Thud</i>


    Raymond hit his gun against the hinges and forced the door open.


    Youve got a lot of strength.


    Raymond lifted the door, which was as heavy as a man. And there right below was adder.


    Going down immediately, Raymond said.


    His Highness Lewis mentioned something in passing before.


    I sometimes hear someone crying in Fathers room, but there would never be anyone there. It sounded as if those cries were from a distance


    Please, please, <i>please.</i> I hope that youre safe. May my oath be not in vain. She <i>cannot </i>be dead. As long as shes alive, then everything else is fine.


    This was all that went on in Raymonds mind.


    Even if she was hurt, even if she had been sexually assaultedas long as she was holding onto her life. May the worst happen, but not her death.


    Whos there!


    Ill take care of it. Go ahead first. Ill follow you after, Sir Barton said.


    Thank you.


    Raymond and the rest of the pce guards rushed down the corridor.


    This corridor


    Dont let your eyes wander. Just follow me.


    The walls were adorned with leather.


    Raymond took only one nce to know what kind of leather it was, but he did not speak about it.


    I should have acted sooner.


    Raymond recalled the time when he was still a designated marksman during the war, and when he was called up for a dangerous mission.


    Why are the prisoners being taken?


    None of your business.


    The prisoners should be on standby so they could be used for negotiations with the other side.


    Whats your rank?


    Raymond found out that the prisoners had been taken to Crown Prince Gueuzes bedroom, and they were never seen again.


    Where are the prisoners now?


    Theyve been moved to another location for the negotiations.


    Some of them had begged Raymond to shoot them in the head. Mainly the women. In the end, a few of them survived. On the battlefield, Raymond had been called a gentleman and a devil.


    Those prisoners of war had turned into ythings, and after they had entered his county, they never stopped being ythings.


    Raymond opened the door.


    * * *


    There are times when the worst of the worst would suddenlye up to greet you.


    The walls of this room were full of corpses. And there were several corpses on the floor as well.


    Donna.


    Raymond knew the face of that maid. She was the maid who had been with Carynne ever since she was still in the Hare manor.


    If this was what she looked like, then


    Your Highness!


    One of the guards ran to the boy at once, but he froze right there.


    Hes dead.


    Despair filled Raymond as he saw Carynne there, smiling a little awkwardly, in a sea of blood.


    He should have felt relieved seeing that she was alive, but he could not feel any relief at all.


    Carynne set down the de that she was holding, then she raised her arms.


    I killed them all. Take me away.


    W-W-What is this.


    Carynne calmly approached the guard and offered her wrists to him. The guard backed away. Another guard was some distance away, retching. A corpse, a corpse, another corpse, here and there.


    Raymond looked at Carynne.


    Their eyes met, but nothing was said between them. Its impossible to know what to say in this situation.


    So, Raymond started with what he needed to do.


    Crown Prince Gueuze is dead.


    Uuuurk, aarrrgh


    Raymond turned to Crown Prince Gueuze. And, he took out his notebook to record the scene of the crime. But he saw the string around Crown Prince Gueuzes neck, and the pearls scattered on the floor. That ne belonged to Carynne. The one who strangled him.


    Raymond closed his eyes.


    And he asked Carynne.


    Are you hurt anywhere?


    Not at all.


    He should say, Thats a relief, but he found himself unable to say it. Without looking at Carynne, he stood up.


    Raymond then went to Prince Lewis, whose eyes were closed. He ced a hand on the boys neck. Still warm. But there was no pulse.


    He saw an abundant amount of blood gushing from both of Prince Lewis legs. The prince was stabbed in the thighs, and the de was twisted so as to cut the major blood vessels.


    It was a method of killing done by those with less strength. And, to top it off, the de that had cut him was the sword that was in Carynnes hands earlier.


    He had to admit it.


    He had no choice but to admit it.


    But he still had to say it himself.


    As the prime suspect, take Carynne Hare away.


    When Carynne took a step closer to the guard, who tried to change the expression on his deathly pale face to one that should be intimidating, she nced up to Raymond.


    Sir Raymond, youre toote.


    She whined with, surprisingly, a casual tone.

 Chapter 128

    Chapter 128


    As with any other country, many dangers faced him, but the current reigning king, Eus II, nheless lived a long life, and he strengthened his position by graciously taking in the numerous subordinates of Grand Duke Ths.


    Even if he were to get cursed at for hundreds of years after his life, he was somehow a king who would never hear notoriety appended to his name.


    Until today.


    Dead


    Eus II heard the shocking news as he was bedridden. The court doctor shuddered and handed the king his medicine. However, the king reached out one hand and demanded that he be raised.


    My sons


    * * *


    Marquis Penceir took off his hat and rubbed his head. He was also shocked at first, and he wasnt able to say anything for hours. Raymond thought that hed be asked to leave, but rather, he wasnt dismissed.


    After staying silent for hours in this room, this was the first thing that Marquis Penceir said to Raymond:


    Its a good thing that you havent married yet.


    From the beginning, he was trying to rid Carynne from Raymonds hands.


    A fianc isnt legally responsible. Im sure that people will talk about it for a while, but As expected, I dont think that youll be given a seat in the Assembly for now.


    That doesnt matter to me, Marquis.


    Dont pretend to be strong. Just go back to your familys estate and rest for a while. Ill call you back after everythings settled. Although I dont know whats going to happen since the incident has blown up so badly right now.


    But Raymond remained seated and did not move. If he were to leave this spot, the result would be obvious.


    Carynne did not kill.


    She confessed.


    She lied. At the very least, she didnt kill all of them.


    Raymond did not budge from his seat at all. He didnt know why she said that.


    Still, just because she confessed doesnt mean that its the truth.


    Marquis, just consider the room alone. That room was Crown Prince Gueuzes basement. How could Carynne have killed so many people in a room like that? And it hasnt even been that long since Carynne started living in the capital. All the bodies were preserved.


    Crown Prince Gueuze did it, thats obvious enough, the marquis replied calmly.


    You knew about it?


    Yes. Thats why His Majesty has been trying to pass on the throne to His Highness Lewis. He reached such an age that hes barely even alive anymore, so dont you think theres a reason that the throne has yet to be given to Gueuze? That old man, if he had died sooner, he wouldnt need to see this.


    People knew, but no one stopped him?


    There was a slight frown on Marquis Penceirs lips as he replied.


    Its easy for you to criticize the actions of others, saying how rotten the royals are. But what is there to do? He was the only heir to the throne. He was the only recognized son of His Majesty the King.


    If that fact had been revealed in front of many people, that would have been enough to take him down from his position right away.


    The Crown Prince? Raymond, say something that makes sense.


    I dont understand why youve been covering his tracksthat you didnt take any actions at all to stop a serial killer.


    The report in Marquis Penceirs hand became crumpled.


    Thats not all. Its not just about covering for Crown Prince Gueuze. We needed another method. Thats why the Royal Family had Prince Lewisno, His Royal Highness, the rightful Crown Prince. Our new king. A morally wless, young, healthy and proper king. It was practically abuse on the old mans part But your fiance ruined it all.


    Crown Prince Lewis?


    Raymond read the strange direction the conversation was taking.


    Prince Lewis was the rightful king? The enemy was Crown Prince Gueuze, but the current reigning king couldnt freely appoint His Highness Lewis as the heir to the throne?


    Raymond was confused.


    However, that was not important right now.


    Carynne didnt do it.


    Go back to your estate. I do not have any intention to hold you ountable for this.


    I wont go back. I swore that Id be next to her.


    This is an order.


    The marquis said this again, but Raymond would not follow.


    Marquis, Im not trying to protect her from everything unconditionally because Im blinded by love right now.


    Thats certainly what it looks like anyway. She confessed, so theres nothing else to discuss. A death penalty will be handed down as soon as the trial is over.


    Marquis, you have the wrong person.


    The only person left alive in that ce was your fiance! Theres no one to prove her innocence! Gueuze, Lewis and her maidtheyre all dead! And even when <i>you</i> opened that door, you saw your fiance holding the de! Do you still not understand? You saw it all with your own eyes. Just admit it.


    The marquis looked away as though he didnt want to see him anymore, but Raymond replied once again.


    At worst, Carynne killed one or two people, but that was an act in retaliation against Crown Prince Gueuze, who was the culprit of all those serial killings. The messenger also told me that Carynne and His Highness Lewis had disappeared at the same time. It would be more urate to say that they had been kidnapped by Crown Prince Gueuze at the same time, and they died during a physical altercation in that room.


    Right, and then Carynne Evans killed both Gueuze and Lewis in the end.


    Please listen to me.


    Carynne Evans confessed. She killed them all.


    She lied.


    And what reason is there for her to lie?


    Because she wants to die.


    She is mentally ill.


    Raymond replied reluctantly.


    Ha!


    And the marquisughed.


    Sure, a mental illness, you say? The same kind that most aristocrats often say to excuse their misdeeds?


    Please dont be sarcastic, Marquis. She truly is ill. Ive already received a medical certificate from the priest.


    Sir Raymond, you are too ignorant of how this world works. Theres only so much that a mental illness could pardon. Rape? Sure. But Carynne Evans killed <i>royalty.</i>


    But how could Carynne have killed all those other people, with their corpses hanging on His Highness basement? And inside the pce?


    Most of the people His Highness killed were prostitutes. Dont focus on the women who died, Raymond. Right now, those womenwell, yes, there were men, too. Right now, the Royal Family will remain silent about those unidentified bodies. And do you know why? Because theres a bigger problem. Both Crown Prince Gueuze and Prince Lewis are dead. And the killer herself had confessed. The priority now is not to disparage the dead any longer, and not to torment our current reigning king.


    Raymond gritted his teeth.


    His Highness the Crown Prince Gueuze, he


    Think about it carefully, Raymond. Theyre all dead. One is left standing. Naturally, she is the culprit. On top of it all, she herself confessed. And the other corpses wont even be mentioned in the trial. Because theyre not important.


    This isnt important. That isnt important either.


    Then what <i>is.</i>


    Raymond knew why Marquis Penceir would continue to downy the case.


    They both knew. Theyre just not saying it outright.


    Marquis, be honest with me.


    Right now, Marquis Penceir was just turning Raymonds words upside down while trying to send him away quietly. And, he was trying to paint Carynne out to be the culprit.


    The reason behind this was simple.


    Its not because of a lingering attachment to Gueuze, nor was it loyalty to the current king.


    Still, Marquis Penceir tilted his head to the side. As though to gauge him.


    What do you mean?


    Crown Prince Gueuze and Prince Lewis. After them both, I know that you have the right to seed the throne.


    Marquis Penceir really didnt want to blow this out of proportion. Because he was to be the next king.


    He nodded slowly.


    Yes. I will be the next king.


    As it was right now, Marquis Penceir didnt even need to defer to the old king anymore.


    Raymond got up from his seat and dered.


    Marquis, I will dedicate my life to you.


    How touching.


    Please save my fiance. I will pledge allegiance to you for the rest of my life.


    And Raymond knew the marquis weaknesses. The marquis, too, might be aware of this fact.


    Raymond looked at the marquis with wide eyes as he said that he would obey him. As if hed draw out a sword to cut the mans throat right then and there if he would not ept this.


    I will give up all my honor and pride, and I will live only for you.


    You only managed to live that kind of life because of me anyway.


    Marquis.


    Raymond looked straight into the marquis eyes.


    Prince Lewis has passed away. I wish to serve the new king.


    Thus far, Ive only tried to live an honorable life. But I dont have to do that now. Because King Lewis does not exist in this world.


    Use me however you like. Throw me away after if you wish. All I ask for in return is my fiances life. She has not sinned.

 Chapter 129

    Chapter 129


    Marquis Penceir didnt say anything back.


    Silence stretched between them once more, but it didntst very long. The marquis spoke.


    Give me an exnation as to why Carynne Evans did not sin. A convincing exnation, in detail.


    <i>Done.</i>


    In front of Marquis Penceir, Raymond wrote with a fountain pen on a piece of parchment, then spoke.


    If we reveal Crown Prince Gueuzes collection, it would be convincing to say that Carynne killed him identally in self-defense.


    You want me to willingly damage the reputation of the Royal Family?


    I will pay the price.


    Raymond pointed to himself. But Marquis Penceir shook his head.


    What about Prince Lewis.


    He must have been stabbed with the sword by Crown Prince Gueuze.


    Didnt you say that Carynne was the one holding that sword?


    Yes, but it wasnt Carynne who used it. It was His Highness Gueuze.


    Evidence?


    Its not decisive evidence per se, but it must have been Crown Prince Gueuze who lowered the sword from the wall. He was the one who used the de first, then Carynne picked it up.


    Thinking back on the sketches, Marquis Penceir realized that the story lined up.


    Isnt it possible that she killed Gueuze first, and then Lewis?


    It isnt.


    Why?


    She cant reach it.


    Aha.


    It was for a simple reason.


    If we consider the timeline, then Crown Prince Gueuze lowered the sword first. Of course, he was the only one there who could have reached it. Thereafter, he used the sword on His Highness Lewis Truthfully, I dont quite understand. The first in line to the throne is still Crown Prince Gueuze. He could have just waited.


    At Raymonds rumination, Marquis Penceir turned a deaf ear.


    Its the Royal Family were talking about, the marquis said. Anyway, so when Gueuze and Lewis were in an altercation, Carynne strangled him from behind But why did she pick up the sword again?


    Most likely for her maid.


    Her maid? Ah, yes. You mentioned that theres one more. Why her?


    It was soon a forgotten fact that Donna had been there. But Raymond knew immediately how she had died.


    One each of her arms and legs was found in Countess Elvas mansion Crown Prince Gueuze had sent them to Carynne. From how much they had dried up, its clear that they were severed from the maids body a long time ago, and the characteristics of the body parts have been confirmed to be hers.


    And the reason behind why Carynne killed Donna was simple.


    It was a mercy killing.


    Haa.


    Marquis Penceir rubbed his temples with both hands. He couldnt wrap his head around it fully.


    Then why did she <i>say</i> that she killed them all?


    Raymond seemed certain.


    Its


    To start over.


    To make sure that she would get the death sentence.


    Because she must be thinking that its more interesting to get the death penalty rather than tomit suicide.


    It would be a new, refreshing experience.


    Because she is mentally ill.


    Thats all Raymond could say.


    Marquis Penceir sighed, then he brought a hand to Raymonds shoulder.


    Everything you said just now is circumstantial. The trial will typically be handled mostly through her confession and through eye-witness ounts. And His Majesty wants a clear culprit. The loss of his children has made him exceedingly furious.


    I see.


    Raymond had already guessed as much.


    Marquis Penceir continued.


    At the very least, make sure that your fiance doesnt talk nonsense. Ill try my best.


    Thank you.


    Raymond rose from his seat. He must convince Carynne. Her lifes precious. She cant give up until the end.


    Even if all honor and pride were to be thrown away to the gutters.


    Why did Crown Prince Gueuze Hate Prince Lewis so much? He was just a boy.


    Raymond recalled the young royal prince who once looked at him with such admiration in his eyes. He could feel his stomach churning. The boy had been too young to die.


    He was a royal, thereforepetition. He wasnt just a boy. And Gueuze Ever since Lewis was born, Gueuze had been under the firm impression that the child wasnt his. Well, its not just his imagination anyway.


    What?


    I thought you knew about it, too. His Highness Lewis was born in theter years of His Majesty the King, with his mistress Madam Berzel. A deal of some sort was made between the King and thete Crown Princess.


    Is that so?


    Maybe it was the case, or maybe it wasnt, but it seemed like the Crown Princess had been barren. She and the Crown Prince never had any children between them. Or perhaps His Highness Gueuze was the problem.


    Marquis Penceir rose from his seat, a bitter smile on his lips.


    In any case, His Majesty will be sure to think of your fiance as his enemy now. Whether it was just one son or two that she killed, or rather, one son or one grandson. Whats the point of counting? Be sure to console your fiance well. I have to meet His Majesty.


    * * *


    Carynne Evans will soon arrive.


    Yes.


    Raymond went to the prison where Carynne Evans was locked up. It was a ce where political prisoners were being detained because she had killed royal heirs.


    If Carynne had killed only a maid like Donna, she would have been imprisoned in a deplorable ce and had been made a ything by male inmates and prison guards, but she killed too big of a fish.


    So, ironically enough, Carynne was safe and sound.


    Go ahead.


    Thank you.


    As the door opened, Carynne walked towards Raymond, all the while being watched by a guard. Inside this room were neat tables and chairs, a carpet on the floor, and a painting of the Holy Mother on the wall.


    Even so, prison was prison.


    The guards were expressionless as they stood there, guns and ropes and all. And bars were solidly in ce at the windows.


    Still, just by looking at Carynnes extremely calm demeanor, its as if this ce was not a prison at all. She even had a hint of a smile.


    Sir Raymond, your face is a mess. You could have cleaned up a little before you came, yes?


    Raymondughed bitterly as he pulled out a chair for Carynne. Since there was no servant present, he had to do it himself.


    Carynne sat down in the chair that Raymond pulled out for her, as if it was the most natural thing in the world.


    On the other hand, youre still as pretty as ever.


    Even in a situation like this.


    When would Carynne <i>not</i> be pretty? This question suddenly passed fleetingly in Raymonds mind. Why was this woman still so pretty in his eyes amidst all this? Did <i>he</i> go crazy?


    However, regardless of what Raymond felt when he saw her, Carynne didnt seem to think of this to be a big deal.


    Thank you.


    Raymond had been scrambling around until now, and he was the one who had be utterly exhausted and unkempt.


    He went ahead and sat as well, in front of Carynne with the table between them. The guards were watching from the back.


    Raymond spoke to them.


    Please give us a moment of privacy.


    That is impossible.


    What could we possibly do in this ce? I am just her fianc. You must understand how difficult the situation is.


    Raymond handed over a pouch full of gold coins. But the prison guard would not take it.


    I shall not ept it.


    Dont be that way.


    The little squabble made Carynne giggle.


    Wow, Sir Raymond. Youre even <i>bribing</i> people now? Youve be corrupted.


    Carynne.


    Raymonds face slightly turned red, but he hurriedly turned his head, and the guard stepped back with an amusing expression on his face.


    I will be right outside. And the door will be left open. No exception.


    Fine.


    With her elbows on the table, Carynne waved at the guard, her eyes twinkling. Its as if she was ying a little game.


    Hmm, are you going to interrogate me? Thats funny. I <i>did</i> think that it would end up like this.


    Is this situation fun to you?


    If I dont find it fun, whats that going to do?


    They had already confessed their love that starry night, but they both knew that their love could note true.


    Carynne. Marquis Penceir will be the next king.


    Oh my, really? Ahh, thats because Prince Lewis is dead, huh I wonder what the coronation will be like.


    <i>Prince Lewis, you</i>


    Raymond tried not to think about it anymore.


    You will be able to see it.


    I wont though?


    <i>You know why I wont.</i>


    Carynne propped her chin on one palm. And she crossed her legs. <i>Ka-tak, ka-tak.</i> He felt the reverberation of her nodding leg.


    <i>You cant save me. Its toote.</i>


    Watching her rebellious attitude, Raymond brought his hands together and leaned forward.


    He <i>must</i> persuade her.

 Chapter 130

    Chapter 130


    Listen to me seriously, Carynne. At the very least, if you want to live, then you shouldnt lie.


    I confessed already, and Ill be executed for my crimes. Sir Raymond, why are you even here?


    Because you did not kill.


    Mmh Sir Raymond.


    <i>Thuk. </i>With the heel of her shoe, Carynne hit Raymonds leg across from her underneath the table. It didnt hurt because the heel wasnt pointed.


    The thing that strangled Crown Prince Gueuze in that ce was <i>my</i> ne. Cant you put two and two together?


    Crown Prince Gueuze was a serial killer, and he kidnapped you. You acted only out of self defense.


    Raymonds rebuttal made Carynne scowlshes not amused.


    Thats the story youre going with?


    Yes.


    Ah, good grief.


    Carynne swept her hair up with her fingers.


    I killed Prince Lewis and Donna, too.


    The sword that had stabbed His Highness Lewis had been perched high on the wall, certainly beyond your reach. And as for Donna She was already badly injured. You merely showed her mercy.


    Thats not what happened though?


    No, that <i>is</i> what happened. Tell me which part is wrong.


    Carynne blinked. And, after a moments thought, she looked up at Raymond, her chin still on her palm. Only her eyes moved.


    To be honest, my pride is a bit slighted. I couldnt win against Crown Prince Gueuze.


    Is that so?


    Yes, at that moment, I wished to be stronger But after everything that happened, its just <i>that </i>in someone elses eyes. What transpired could not reveal what kind of resentment I felt inside, or what I thought during the process. I merely look <i>weak</i> to you.


    Raymond listened to Carynne as she sighed, then he took out the documents he brought for her.


    Yourwyer wille visit you tomorrow. And the trial will be in three days.


    Carynne looked at Raymond, slightly fed-up.


    Gracious Sir Raymond, you really havent given up yet?


    Yes. Because you didnt kill him. The trial hasnt even begun yet.


    Crown Prince Gueuze No, just stop it. Sir Raymond, look. <i>Look at me.</i> What do you see?


    I see a beautiful woman.


    At that, Carynne looked like she wanted to tear Raymond apart then and there.


    I told you to stop makingme jokes.


    Ill try.


    What do you think of Prince Lewis?


    I think that he was lost too soon.


    Thinking about Prince Lewis made Raymond feel heartbroken. The boy looked up at him so much.


    However, he needed to focus on someone that he could save now, in the present.


    Carynne stared at Raymond.


    Sir Raymond, we can all start over. Me, you, Prince Lewis Even Donna.


    After you die?


    I will live again. It doesnt matter if you believe me or not. And you cant convince me otherwise.


    Raymond didnt say anything back. What he needed to make sure here was that Carynne wouldnt talk. There in the court, in front of the judge, she could <i>not</i> say, I killed them all. Give me the death penalty. This singr move would wipe out all other preparations.


    The oue wasnt set, and they really wouldnt know until theyd try everything. But Carynne herself had no will to live. Circumstantial evidence would not be able to beat a confession.


    In order for the countless number of bodies to be attributed to the crown prince, it was crucial to get direct confessions from his subordinates. And that would be dealt with by Marquis Penceir.


    They wouldnt know until the end of the trial.


    But in the end, the probability of sess was zero, yet Raymond continued to cling to it.


    You think of life in too much of an inconsequential manner.


    Death is inconsequential, too.


    Why did you tell me to love you?


    Because I want to die.


    At that, Raymond asked.


    Then, are you satisfied now?


    Carynnes eyes went wide. She stared at Raymonds expression. Raymond himself did not know what kind of face he was making. But he was sure of this: he felt utterly miserable.


    Sir Raymond, are you angry?


    At least try to live, Carynne. Do not denigrate your own life.


    Haa.


    Carynne sighed. And she lowered her eyes.


    In the end, you dont believe me.


    Sir Raymond, Im not afraid of being sentenced to death. Ill live again. Actually, Im hoping for it more. This life was too chaotic, and your love is just I dont understand it. But I know that youre trying.


    Carynne.


    Carynne looked straight ahead once more. Her eyes met Raymonds, and she straightened her posture.


    She made up her mind.


    I will be executed. And it will all start over. Prince Lewis will be the rightful king next time. Donna wille back.


    People donte back to life.


    I know you dont believe me, but can you at least <i>pretend?</i>


    It wasnt him who should do the bare minimum of pretendingit was <i>her</i>.


    Raymond clenched his hands into fists.


    Im trying to save you right now. Cant you see?


    Im trying, too. I want to give you a better future. Im being as behaved as I can be.


    From the very beginning, she did not love anyone. She asked for love, but she did not love. Not even Raymond.


    But he thought that it would be alright.


    Because there would be plenty of time.


    Carynne, theres no such thing as a world outside the novel. Your life will be over once you die.


    But no. There is no time.


    I sent all of your records to four professors just to check. You hold no new knowledge. You keep saying that youe from a world outside the novel you speak of, but that ce does not exist.


    Carynne watched Raymond silently. Raymond felt as if there was something stabbing him from the inside.


    Reverend Dun also said that those are all lies for the sake of curing you. You dont live over and over again.


    You You dont believe me But the truth wont change.


    Carynne groaned as she answered back.


    Even until the bitter end, she would not look at the situation properly.


    Raymond rose from his seat.


    Nothing you say is correct. My older brother died five days ago. I was in the middle of working. It was an ident. I couldnt even go back to the estate because I was working together with Marquis Penceir. You didnt know any of that. You never told me it would happen.


    That You, never once did you say


    Crown Prince Gueuze and Prince Lewis were brothers. Baron Ein wasnt the culprit of the serial killings You dont know <i>anything</i>, Carynne.


    Wait Wait a second.


    Carynne gasped. It seemed as if she was finding it unbearable to hear what she didnt want to hear.


    <i>At the very least</i>, dont inflict the death penalty unto yourself with a confession. Think of me.


    Raymond thought,


    Carynne doesnt love me. She doesnt even respect me. She wouldnt do this to me if she ever did. To someone trying his hardest to save her, she wouldnt talk to me like she doesnt care.


    Think of it as courtesy towards me.


    Raymond left. Carynne was still bowing her head.


    As Raymond walked through the door, the guard tried to talk to him, but he was in no mood to exchange any more words.


    Raymond left the building. It was the middle of the night.


    He needed to find awyer so that she could be persuaded again. Even if its just to keep her silent.


    Raymond found it difficult to deal with Carynne.


    His older brother died. It was a death with no meaning.


    Prince Lewis was dead. It was a death that happened too early.


    Donna was dead. It was a death that no one remembered.


    Raymond hated that kind of death.


    But the trial hasnt even begun yet.


    Its not that theres <i>no</i> possibility at all.


    He would continue to hope. The evening sky was full of stars. Just like the day he confessed to her.


    It hadnt been long, but why did it feel like an eternity had passed since then?


    Raymond leaned against the buildings outer wall and closed his eyes,


    Helpless.


    * * *


    Carynne was aware that she had been turning a blind eye to reality thus far. Even if she had repeated to herself, several times, that she should focus on realitybut all of it was just an act of escapism.


    Didnt she already realize that from the beginning?


    Yet she turned away. She was scared.


    You dont know <i>anything.</i>


    Its you who doesnt know anything.


    Its far from the truth that Carynne lived by. Its far from the things that Raymond did not know.


    However it was that the world worked, none of that had anything to do with Carynne.


    But what difference would that make?

 Chapter 131

    Chapter 131


    You have to be honest with me. Tell me everything.


    Who sent you here?


    Marquis Penceir.


    The sses-wearingwyer sitting in front of Carynne looked ancient. Wrinkles upon wrinkles were covering his face, and there was a glint in his eyes that made him seem cunning.


    Even so, his voice sounded young. He was a man of old age, yet was full of strength.


    He was a man who had lived through the years that Carynne could not.


    Sure But Im a little tired now. Ive said the same exact thing so many times already. Can I have some tea?


    Of course.


    Thewyer spoke to a prison guard, and that guard served some tea just as he was told. His demeanor wasnt as stiff now, different from when Raymond had visited. He seemed to be well acquainted with thewyer.


    Seems like the Marquis took special care in choosing mywyer.


    This thought passed through Carynnes mind as she stared at the tea that had been set before her on the table. She killed someone, yet look at her now, drinking tea like this. Better yet, she killed such a high-profile man.


    If she had been incarcerated under the charges of killing only Donna, Carynne wouldnt even have any clothes on her by now.


    Kill one person, youre a murderer.


    Kill a hundred, youre a hero.


    Kill ten thousand, youre a god.


    Though far from being considered a hero, Carynne was still living quite a luxurious lifepared to most murderers.


    Miss Carynne, please focus.


    Sorry. Ive been quite scatteredtely.


    It tends to be that way when you have to prepare for a trial. Especially because you need to repeat the same thing over and over again. It must be exhausting.


    Moderate constion.


    Even so, it was only natural that his voice was slithery and his eyes were cold.


    Doesnt matter anyway.


    Carynne was thiswyers cash cow right now.


    She set down her teacup and stared at the old man.


    Do you think I can get a not guilty verdict?


    If you are not guilty, Miss Carynne, then of course youll be acquitted of your alleged crimes.


    Thewyer stared back at Carynne.


    A business smile appeared on his face.


    Miss Carynne, <i>are</i> you innocent?


    Well, Carynne wanted to die.


    And getting the death penalty seemed like a fun, too.


    If she were to die like this, its actually quite the blessing for her.


    I killed them all. Take me away.


    I killed His Highness the Crown Prince, Prince Lewis, and Donna.


    Ah, shes my maid, by the way.


    Carynne repeated the same words incessantly.


    Falsehoods mingled with fragments of the truth. Words thrown at random for the sake of getting the death sentence. Words that people <i>want</i> to hear.


    I didnt kill Prince Lewis.


    This time, Carynne began to recount what truly happened.


    It was her courtesy towards Raymond.


    As Carynne spoke, thewyers expression began to change slightly.


    Lets be positive about tomorrows trial. Since the Marquis said that he will divulge the actions of thete Crown Prince Gueuze, we might be able to change the ruling to incarceration instead.


    And how many years would that be?


    That doesnt matter right now. Miss Carynne, you shouldnt speak as you have been doing so far when you take the stand tomorrow. We have enough evidence, and with your cooperation, we can avoid the capital punishment.


    Is that so.


    Carynne stared down at the teacup in front of her. Before she knew it, the cup had already been emptied.


    After tomorrows trial, the end would inevitably be the same, regardless of whether shed get the death penalty or life imprisonment.


    Theres no such thing as another life where you can start over.


    No, hes wrong. But she couldnt convince him otherwise. This was what Carynne had to go through. He does not understand. He will never understand. At this point, it was none of Carynnes business how hard Raymond was trying to keep her alive. Carynne doesnt even care what kind of king Prince Lewis would have been.


    All of them dont understand Carynne. There was a wall between Carynne and everyone else in this world. About a books width. Its thin, but its impossible to break. Ink cannot escape paper.


    I wish to perform the sacrament of confession before the trial begins.


    Miss Carynne, you must be more honest with <i>me</i> rather than any priest.


    I already told you everything that I can. But my confession has nothing to do with any of that.


    Im afraid that it might be the death penalty.


    Hearing Carynne say this, thewyer nodded. Indeed, he wasnt sure either. Even if thew could be construed to a certain extent, the opponent here was the royal family. The victims were members of the royal family. Even if Raymond was well connected with the new king, the current reigning king was still the same, and <i>he</i> lost his children. The very king of this country considers Carynne to be his enemy. Nothings certain.


    Alright.


    As thewyer nodded, Carynne added the most important thing.


    Dun Roid, please. But I dont know where he is right now.


    Alright.


    And so, Dun re-enters the stage.


    Only one day left before the trial.


    * * *


    Go in.


    Carynne sat up straight the moment she heard that he had arrived. The trial was now just a day away. And she didnt have much time left. If shed be sentenced to death tomorrow, she could get locked up in a ce where she wouldnt be able to meet anyone else. She might end up all alone, waiting until the day shed be put to sleep.


    So, she <i>must</i> meet him before then.


    Now, hes here.


    Duns here.


    And it was judgment day.


    Carynne stared at him. His ck eyes were veiled. She couldnt read his intentions, not like how she could before.


    I will be outside, the guard said.


    T-T-Thanks.


    Ha.


    All the prison guards left the room. Thats the kind of privilege a priest had.


    Carynne smiled in vain as she watched them all leave, recalling how they wouldnt even budge when Raymond had asked them to do the same.


    Raymond wanted them to leave, whereas Dun looked quite unhappy that he had to be alone with Carynne.


    Dont you have something to tell me?


    I, I didnt know that, youd go as as far as C-Crown Prince Gueuze


    Ah, to be honest, <i>youre</i> the one Ive been wanting to kill.


    Carynne admitted this as she looked Dun dead in the eye. He didnt know what she actually experienced, but she didnt really mind that minor detail. As long as she didnt have to go through the nasty experience of receiving her mothers leftovers.


    Dun sat down, gripping the hem of his priests robe. His demeanor right now made it look like he had done something wrong, and hes waiting to be scolded.


    But, really. Its not him who should want to cry right now.


    Carynne also clutched her skirt.


    Stop that.


    Carynne closed her eyes. She wasnt even angry right now. Before she talked to Raymond, she thought that shed fly off the handle the moment shed meet Dun.


    To me Does meaning even <i>exist</i> for me when Im just living the same life over and over again? Ah, well, I guess theres no other iteration as unpleasant as <i>this</i> one.


    Im s


    I dont want to get an apology from the likes of you. That doesnt mean anything right now You know that.


    Carynne had already made up her mind when she took off her ne back then.


    In this iteration, Raymond was no different from her previous lives, and Carynne was exhausted and uncertain. She had already given up on this iteration, already thinking of the next one. Waiting for the ruling of her death sentence was a small delight she was partaking in.


    You know, this time as well, I dont think I can live anymore.


    True love or whatever, thats just another load of bull as well. Thewyer and Raymond keep saying that its still uncertain, but I know that I wont be able to live through it in this life. Even if I dont get the death penalty, Ive had experience standing trial before.


    W-When?


    It doesnt matter. Doesnt when it happened. I once slept with a married man, and his wifemitted suicide. So, I got locked up, and the prison guard was her older brother. Everything ended with rat poison in my food Even then, Raymond didnt give up on me. Isnt that funny?


    Thats why Carynne wasnt sure. Even so, Raymonds words prevented her from running away.


    Carynne observed Duns reaction. This deathly pale, dead-eyed priest.


    Still, she knew what he looked like when he was a little younger.


    Why is Mom saying that to me.


    Riding a swing, a boy with a frown on his face stood behind her.


    Ive already given up on listening to you talk about true love.


    Why


    More than the trial, or whatever else Besides the death penalty or whatever it is that lies before me at the end of it all Theres something I need to confirm. Not the usual bullshit that you spout. The truth.


    Dun stared at her. And Carynne stared back at him.


    It was judgment day.


    This did not pertain to the court trial. That was a trivial matter.


    You mentioned before that it was an act offort to think that Im from outside the novel. Right I needed constion. That Im not from here And that theres a ce I can return to. So I should have real family, real friends


    Then what was your original name? Raymond asked.


    I dont remember. It was more than a hundred years ago.


    Its <i>impossible</i> to remember. Because, from the very start, I <i>am</i> Carynne Hare. Ive known ever since I went to visit Missus Deere. Theres no way I wouldnt notice. Nancy just instilled false hope in me.


    Its alright, its alright.


    Everythings just part of the novel.


    She had to remember that this was what one gypsy woman had whispered to her every night.


    As a crippling sense of loss loomed closer and closer, Carynne had struggled desperately against fear itself.


    And this was the voice thatforted her.


    Carynne could not stop all these repressed memories froming back to the surface.

 Chapter 132

    Chapter 132


    * * *


    She fell into a novel. 117 years had passed.


    This girl, who was 117 years old.


    From the very beginning, she had been born inside this world. Inside the novel.


    * * *


    Carynne tried to stop her voice from trembling. Tried to stop herself from crying. Theres something she needed to confirm right now.


    Theres no way I didnt know that at the start. As soon as I heard it, I realized. As soon as I heard that Mother and I are the same, I knew! Theres no way that I didnt know


    I was told that Mother and I are the same


    One beautiful, red-haired woman. Another beautiful red-haired woman. More beautiful, red-haired women.


    But I didnt want to know that, and <i>you</i> didnt tell me clearly either. Its something that anyone would have realized We didnt confirm it, you and I both just spoke about it vaguely. And theres that bullshit about love.


    Carynne felt like her throat was closing off. But no. She had to say it. She had to say it herself. It desperately needed to be said right now. In just a little while, the ending woulde again, and she would die, and then start once more. If she would not be pushed to the point of killing other people again, then again<i>again</i>Dun would not say anything at all.


    Mother gave birth to me, and if it stopped after that Then its simple. Its something that anyone would piece together. I just need to give birth and pass the curse to the child


    Carynne needed to continue speaking. But it felt as if her blood was about to burst from her. She did not want to talk. She did not want to confirm it. She did not want a definite answer. But everything was undeniablethe words of Raymond, Missus Deere, Crown Prince Gueuze, Lewis, Catherine.


    So thats how it is. My child would be the result of love. If I find love, if I build a family with the person I love, then it will all be over.


    But this was not possible for Carynne. Carynne clenched her fists tighter. Her hands were bleeding. But she did not feel any pain. She wanted to run away. But she could not. Because.


    Thefort that you mentioned before True love After all, its just a load of bull, as expected. Just a mirage.


    Mothers mother, the mother of Mothers mother, a blessing passed down by blood, a repetition of time.


    Because Im barren.


    In the end, Carynne said it.


    Tears streamed down her eyes.


    Many, many times.


    Even if her father did not say it, even if Deere didnt say it. Carynne doubted it several times during all her lifetimes. Her period was extremely irregr. But thats just how a womans body would respond to extreme stress. Carynne tried not to think about it.


    She had spent countless nights with countless men, but nothing came out of any of that. Out of curiosity, she met more and more men. Meet, fuck, check. If nothing bore fruit with Raymond, then shed check with Dun. If not him, then Borwen. If not him, then another man. And another man. Even the sexual offenders on the streets. Even married men who already had children.


    And in the end, Carynne had no choice but to face the truth.


    She was incapable of bearing children.


    Then The way to end it all is impossible for me. Isnt it?


    Carynne looked at Dun. Her eyes continued to overflow. She could not tell if what spilled down were tears or blood. But she could still see Dun. In the meantime, she wished to be given denial. She wished to be given hope.


    But Dun nodded.


    It was a death sentence.


    I see.


    She did not scream.


    Inside the room, the silence was deafening.


    * * *


    She could not even cry.


    Now lying down, Carynnes eyes remained dry. It didnt matter if time continued to flow. She needed time for herselfto shut herself away. Up until a while ago, prison felt like a good escape, but not anymore for Carynne. There was only one day left before the trial. No. Actually, she had a lot of time. So much time. She had an eternity ahead of her. Its been like that since the beginning.


    She did not know what to do. She just lied down. If shed justy here like a stone statue, then no thoughts would reach her


    Someone, just kill me. Someone, just put me in a coffin, tie it to a boulder, and throw me into the depths of the ocean. So that I wonte back to life.


    But then, even if thats done to me, Ill still be reborn. The next time I open my eyes, Ill be in that cold garden yet again, standing alone beneath the rain.


    No matter how desperate I am, time will pass.


    Even if I want to, I cant go entirely insane. No, maybe Ive already crossed that threshold? Who in this world could define lunacy anyway? I dont want to think about anything. If I can just stay here, like a tree or like a stone, I


    But Carynne knew. Even if she wanted to hit her head, even if she wanted to go off the deep end, all her wounds would heal over time. Her body would forcefully be reverted to its original state, and so would her mind. After all, the mind was connected to the body. She could never be free from the shackles of sanity. Forever.


    Morning came.


    Even if she wanted to die, morning would never fail toe to her. Regardless of the fact that the cruel truth had been revealed in and clear now, morning woulde. Nothing would change.


    Carynne Evans, its the day of your trial. Come out.


    Carynne had just remained on the bed all night, weeping. Lying still like a corpse. Shedding tears. Nevertheless, morning came. Her judgment was over. Now, it was time for human judgment. A trivial thing that was of no consequence to Carynne.


    She turned her head, but she could not get up. Because all she did was lie there and cry all night, she had no strength left inside her.


    Get up Damn it. You, open the door and go in.


    A prison guard went in and roughly raised Carynne from the bed. As she had been lying there, tears continued to fall, but now that she was dragged by them, she had to get up. She tried to stand on her own, but she did not have enough strength.


    Still, it did not matter. They were the same people whod drag her to the stand. One way or another, they would hand Carynne over to the court, then sentence her to death. This time, too.


    Carynne, pleasee to your senses.


    Before she knew it, Raymond was next to her.


    Carynne looked forward. She did not notice how it happened, but she had been dragged outside. She was no longer in her prison cell. Even if she did not move a single muscle, she could not avoid the events that would transpire. Yet again, time moved forward.


    Ah, I think I really have gone crazy now. I cant remember how I came here.


    Raymond firmly held Carynnes shoulders.


    Its time to go into the courtroom. Im saying this just in case, but Please, just stay still.


    Carynne looked down at the shackles on her wrists. Shes here for the crime of killing Crown Prince Gueuze. She raised her head. There, Raymonds face. He always had the same face. However, its rare to see him be so tired like this. Hes about to go into a courtroom, so he dressed neatly. But beyond that, his face and his body exuded fatigue. This was new.


    Carynne.


    Yes, Sir Raymond.


    Carynne finally opened her lips to speak. A hoarse voice came outa voice that she did not want to hear. But no one paid any attention to this. Raymond tightened his grip on her shoulders as he spoke.


    The Marquis has agreed to disclose Crown Prince Gueuzes misdeeds. And Ive already handed over all of the evidence. I also got in touch with the jury separately.


    Youre bing a viin.


    It is only an expression of my sincerity.


    Raymond remained adamant. He did not believe Carynne. What Carynne wished for was a distant hopeperfection that would glimmer dimly far away. But Raymond staunchly remained rooted in reality. This time, too.


    It didnt seem like he ever believed her. Because hes an unchanging man. Still, he tried. This time, too.


    Please have strength.


    But that meant nothing.


    There is hope. So please, keep your wits about you. Youll Youll only be given a verdict for the crime that you trulymitted.


    Despite it all, he never promised that she would bepletely acquitted from everything. Carynne smirked.


    Love is meaningless.


    Death is meaningless.


    Why is he even still trying.


    Please get it together.


    Yes, I understand.


    She needed to get it together.


    Next to Carynne were the prison guards, Raymond, and herwyer. To them, what shes doing was nothing short of whining. They would do nothing even as Carynnes world was crumbling before her very eyes. Even if she were to cry and falter in the middle of the stage, she was not allowed to copse. That would be the finale.


    In this life, I will also I will do my best.


    A death sentence, or perhaps another way to die. The end of this life was just around the corner anyway. Carynne was so, <i>utterly</i> tired. All she wanted to do was lie down and rest. Even thinking was too exhausting.


    In the next life, she should just not leave her room. She would just lie down just lie down, so


    ll be fine.


    And so, without another word said between Carynne and Raymond, they took a step forward. It was now truly time to enter the courtroom. Carynne could not wait for the end. All she wanted was to stay in her room and do nothing.


    The prison doors opened.

 Chapter 133

    Chapter 133


    Blinded by the re of the noon sun, Carynne winced. Where was the carriage?


    As she turned her head, someone in the distance pointed at her.


    Thats her!


    Someone shouted. There was a crowd. The sound of their footsteps rapidly came in. Raymond hurriedly pulled the absent-minded Carynne behind her, and she was soon surrounded in a circle by Raymond and the prison guards.


    Carynne, bow your head.


    Raymond took off his coat in a hurry, then he ced it over Carynne. Even so, the outcry had already been heard and was spreading throughout many people. Raymond led Carynne urgently.


    That woman killed him!


    That witch!


    Murderer!


    <i>St!</i>


    It sounded like something had been thrown. A dull sound rang out. Raymond must have gotten hit.


    <i>St St!</i>


    Several more came in a row. Raymond hurriedly picked up Carynne and brought her into the carriage. She looked out the window. There were people. More than just one or two. Raymond took off the sullied coat that was over Carynne and threw it to the ground.


    Then, he red at the guards.


    Who are those people?


    They started gathering early in the morning. Theyve been told to leave, but they won''t listen


    Isnt it <i>your</i> duty to keep them in line?


    Raymond flung his anger at the guards, but they just remained the same.


    Raymond sat down next to Carynne, then drew the curtains of the carriage window.


    Holding her shoulders, Raymond asked her. She was still in a daze.


    Carynne, are you alright?


    Im fine.


    Because the one who got hit was Raymond, not her.


    He lifted the curtain just a little then peered outside.


    Its strange. Surely Your trial should have been kept confidential. Where the hell did those peoplee from?


    Raymond lowered the curtain again.


    Never mind. They wont be a hindrance.


    After saying so, Raymond kept quiet. He didnt seem to believe his own words. Carynne watched as he gritted his teeth.


    Itll be fine.


    Carynnes gaze turned towards the coat lying on the floor. It was dripping with tomatoes and eggs. The once luxurious ck military uniform turned dirty and trash-like. It would be difficult to put that back on.


    Carynne turned away. None of this was her business. Nothing was important to Carynne now.


    Good, evil, love.


    Raymonds sacrifice, Duns secret.


    Even though she should care, none of this mattered to her now.


    But why did the mere sight of Raymond keep bothering her?


    Carynne could not understand Raymond.


    * * *


    We have arrived.


    As they waited inside the rattling carriage for a while, they finally arrived in front of the courthouse. Raymond escorted Carynne.


    She stared up at the huge building, which had a long horizontal entature. The colossal building that was the courthouse was lined with columns. The building exuded such an overwhelming atmosphere.


    Carynne, I have to go in first.


    I know.


    The defendant would have to sit separately. Legally speaking, Carynne and Raymond were strangers because they had yet to marry. Even if they were engaged and had entered high society together, they were still legally mere strangers.


    Because youve experienced it before? Still thought, you must


    Sir Raymond. Ill stay still.


    Carynne cut off Raymond mid-sentence. He nced down at her anxiously, but Carynne did not say anything more.


    Raymond held Carynnes hand onest time, squeezed it tightly, then let go.


    Ill be with you again after its over.


    And so, Raymond promptly went up the stairs first. Carynne stared after him. After ascending the stairs, Raymond soon disappeared behind the columns.


    When he was gone from sight, the guards tapped Carynne from behind. She was propping herself up by holding onto the stair railing because she felt like shes about to copse again.


    You need to be inside right away.


    I know already. Cant you take it easy?


    Carynne took a slow, deep breath. Then, after staring at the white, starlight-like stairs, she took her first step up.


    Through the white columns, sculptures of saints were looking down on people. They were looking down at the sinners who were about to go inside.


    Carynne looked at the massive door that was between two columns. Its her first time here. Since she wasnt just a mere petty criminal this time, but a fiend who had in royal blood, this was where she was taken.


    At a building she was entering for the first time ever, Carynne felt out of ce.


    She climbed the stairs. Strangely enough, her steps were light. She saw the guards by the door. They looked at her, then opened the door.


    Ironically, she came here as a fiend, but it felt like she was being treated quite nicely.


    After passing through the well-lit hallway, she now stood in front of the courtrooms door. And, this door, too, opened for her.


    <i>Creeeak.</i>


    The courtroom. Gathered people. Serious faces. All looking down at Carynne.


    There was an old judge at the front, a prosecutor on the other side, awyer on this side, and the jury on both sides. Raymond was waiting for her inside, looking at her with nervous eyes, then the guards were still behind her. The crowd watched her.


    This is like


    Carynne felt a wave of dj vu.


    Like a wedding.


    Eyes, eyes, eyes. Carynne scanned through everyones faces. Royalty, nobles, more nobles. Compared to a wedding, the caliber of todays guests was even higher.


    But of course, she was not greeted with apuse.


    That girl is


    Oh my goodness.


    She was greeted with whispers.


    But they werent all too loud. Carynne nced sideways to look at them. She found a few acquaintances. Well, mostly nobles. Since the dead were members of the royal family, the date of the trial seemed to have been made known to only limited people.


    Thats a relief. At least, none of these people would throw tomatoes or eggs at Carynne. She didnt bring a change of clothes.


    Carynne stepped into the courtroom.


    <i>Ta-dak.</i>


    Her footsteps echoed along the ck marble floor. With a white ceiling up above, the judge was sitting there at the end, as if officiating a wedding. Of course, he wouldnt be giving Carynne a blessed ceremony.


    <i>Ta-dak.</i>


    She raised her chin and kept her posture straight. This was her final courtesyher courtesy to Raymond. A promise to impart the least violent ending to a man who strived so hard to live.


    Carynne walked forward. She must sit there, at the sinners seatthe defendants seat. There was a white cloth hanging over her face. It was to block other peoples eyes. However, it reminded her of the white cloth that would cover a corpses face, right before the coffins lid would be closed. In reality now, they werent so different. She sat down. Its fortunate that the chair had a backrest and armrests. Even through the thin fabric of the white cloth, she could hear their voices.


    Thats Carynne Evans. Have you ever met her before?


    Sir Raymond Saytes fiance At least, she <i>was</i> his fiance.


    Shes still so young But towards Crown Prince Gueuze and His Highness Lewis


    Catherines daughter My word, this really how


    None of what she did mattered now. Just, to be moved by an external force. Someone would speak, and she would move. She was just hoping that this trial would be over with soon


    Carynne was bothered by the hushed whispers echoing around her, and the gazes that persistently looked at her. <i>Who are you all to me. What relevance do you all hold over me. I am someone from outside this world.</i>


    All that remained to urge her forward was herst piece of courtesy and sincerity towards Raymond.


    Haa.


    Sighing onto the cloth, Carynne closed her eyes. Nothing mattered. Her only wish was that this would end soon. Shes terribly exhausted.


    <i>Tang, tang!</i>


    Order in the court.


    Peoples voices died down. Coughs followed, however.


    Before we begin this trial, let us take a moment to mourn the loss of our future king.


    This statement was tinged with emotion, even though the person who spoke was a member of the jury. In silence, everyone made a sign of the cross. After all, most nobles were distant rtives and were bound by blood.


    Who were they mourning, Gueuze or Lewis?


    Dazedly, Carynne appreciated their silence. But it didntst long.


    Now was not the time to mourn. Rather, it was the time for judgment.

 Chapter 134

    Chapter 134


    After a brief period of silence, the man spoke in a deadpan tone.


    The horrific incident happened on the XXth day of the month of XXXX. Location, the basement of the Royal Pce.


    Then followed the exnation of what Carynne supposedly did. She listened to the dry voice recite what she had personally been repeating over and over before. It was quite a refreshing experience to hear it from another persons mouth, especially since they organized it.


    This woman here, Carynne Evans. Towards Crown Prince Gueuze, in that ce


    and strangled him to death whilst


    Carynne heard that Crown Prince Gueuze was quite a handsome man back in the day. But when he died, he was just ugly.


    Did Catherine choose men by looking at only their face? As a matter of fact, if she had also died dozens or hundreds of times, aesthetics might not have mattered to her in the end.


    Was there a time when Crown Prince Gueuze had revealed this hobby of his?


    Carynne thought, perhaps next time, she could just be Crown Prince Gueuzes pet so she could ask him about Catherine. She loathed how shed have to take leftovers, but nothings taboo when she had eternity to look forward to.


    cut her own maids limbs, then


    Donna


    Carynne recalled the round-faced maid. Carynne didnt know much about Donna. And Donna didnt know much about Carynne either. They were equally strangers to each other. Donna was a mere temporary recement after Nancy was gone. However, Carynne quite liked the courage that Donna showed at the end. It was pleasant to see such grit and humanity as she did not give up until the bitter end. Because Carynne herself did not have it anymore. Next time Next time.


    As such, it is undeniable that Carynne Evans ne was the tool that was used to strangle Crown Prince Gueuze. Tell me, Countess Elva, have you ever seen the defendant wear this ne?


    Yes. Im certain that its her ne.


    Carynne only now realized that Countess Elva had been called as a witness. She wondered if Lady Lianne was here as well, but she doubted it. She tried to see through the white cloth, but she couldnt find the girl anywhere.


    What more needs to be said? the prosecutor asked.


    With all due respect, that is nothing but mere conjecture. First of all, theres something about Crown Prince Gueuze that needs to be revealed. Please take a look at this.


    Carynneswyer spoke with a distinct voice as he stood up from his seat.


    The prosecutor became flustered, and at this, thewyer delivered his rebuttal. On and on, their argument continued endlessly. Strangely enough, it didnt feel quite real to her. Was it because her eyes were blocked by the white cloth? Carynne was just looking forward to staying in this chair.


    Crown Prince Gueuze was a serial killer.


    Outside this white cloth over her face, it seemed like they were discussing something fun. It was a cycle of thewyer respectfully presenting his arguments, of the prosecutor countering back, of the audience going abuzz, then of the judge bringing down his gavel while shouting, Order! Order in the courtroom!


    In his own way, it seemed like Marquis had set the stage for Raymond. Even though Carynne had killed Crown Prince Gueuze, the swearing thats directed at her was clear but minimal. Beyond the white cloth, she could feel people walking on eggshells throughout this situation.


    The crown prince was dead anyway, so was the young prince.


    Now that Marquis Penceir had decided to give Raymond his full support, it would be insane for anyone to show any tant hostility against Carynne.


    Theres only one reason that the defendant acted in the way that she did in that basement, and it was to protect thete Prince Lewis.


    What did Raymond decide to give Marquis Penceir in return? Carynne leaned back against her chair. This was going smoother than she was expecting. She already did not care whether shed be sentenced to death. Well, at the end of the day, she already had a death sentence to her name, but in a different sense.


    Still, Raymond had painstakingly made his own efforts, and the results were now showing.


    Would this life end like this?


    Yet another the end with Raymond again? If the end was going to be the same anyway, why must it always end with her death? Carynne was curious about that. Was it the same with her mother? And with her mothers mother? Did they just decide to pass on the curse because they had gotten too tired andzy to keep repeating the same cycle of dying and living again?


    Well, did that even matter.


    Through the white cloth, Carynne could see the golden hair of Raymond. The man who Carynne had chosen.


    Think of it as your courtesy towards me.


    Raymond did not say the word love.


    It seems as if I truly do love you.


    Even though he confessed to her like this, he also knew. He was well aware that Carynne would never be capable of loving him in the same way.


    Carynne closed her eyes, then opened them once more. Just one nce, and she could see him at once through the white cloth. Just as the sun never failed to rise, he was as beautiful as ever. Raymond never changed.


    Carynne would die now. And shed die again in the future. The restraints around her wouldnt change. She didnt know how shed live from now on.


    An eternity of silence, solitude, destion.


    Whaty ahead of her terrified her.


    However.


    Your Honor, and members of the jury. I respectfully ask that you give this your thorough consideration.


    Carynne didnt know how to describe what she was feeling.


    To feel sympathetic? To be moved? But even if Raymond was not the answer, even if Raymond was of no help to her at all, she did not like that his efforts would result in futility.


    Should I die next to him this time?


    Carynne would never be capable of loving Raymond Saytes, but at the very least, she would like to keep the courtesy she promised him. That much had enough weight.


    * * *


    And so, the trial came to an end. Carynne remained seated as she closed her eyes, tired of fidgeting with her fingers.


    Before she knew it, the sun had already fallen to the west, now seen through the courtrooms window, and she was feeling drowsy. At the time that most people had be weary, the judge banged his gavel.


    It is now time for the final cross-examination.


    Was it finally over? Carynne straightened her posture. If she were to be honest, too, the atmosphere inside the courtroom was not so bad.


    Under thew of this country, the jurys opinion yed a significant role, and the nobles were driven by their own self-interests. Besides that, the people who previously followed Crown Prince Gueuze while he was still alive were shocked to hear about his misdeeds, and so they seem to have eased up on Carynne.


    However, it was at that moment.


    Just a moment, Your Honor. Thest witness has arrived.


    The prosecutor interrupted the judge in a hurry. The judge merely polished his sses. He skimmed through the list of witnesses and the list of all the evidence that had been submitted by the prosecutor. He furrowed his brows.


    It was a bted addition, I see. Alright, let the witness in.


    Thank you.


    Who was it?


    Carynne peered through the white cloth.


    Then, the heavy doors opened.


    Someone came in.


    <i>Ah!</i>


    Carynne nearly shouted out in pure delight.


    Its him again, even this time. She could hear the sound of his shoes across the marble. The entire courtroom fell to a hush. She heard someone say, Carynne Hare. Then, she heard that personugh.


    Laughter directed at Carynne.


    Oh, at this derisive twist of fate.


    To whom would she die this time?


    Its going to be difficult to guess.


    Entering, Verdic Evans, and his daughter, Ise Evans.


    <i>ck, ck.</i>


    Ise Evans walked into the dead-silent courtroom.


    * * *


    Her dull blond hair shone in the afternoon sun. Carynne lifted the cloth that was blocking her view and looked at the other woman. Ise Evans also looked back at Carynne.


    For a moment, their eyes met. She seemed to be trembling a little. However, it was not enough to stop her from walking.


    <i>ck, ck.</i>


    Ise Evans approached the bible and ced her hand atop it.


    I do solemnly and sincerely dere that I shall utter the whole truth and nothing but the truth.


    Her tone of voice was different from the usual, perhaps because she was nervous. With the cloth still up, Carynne leaned her upper body forward.


    Ise.


    How long had it been since shest saw Ises face? Her face looked a bit swollen. It also seemed like her hair was a little damaged. She didnt seem to be in her best condition either, huh. Carynne closely inspected Ises dry hair, which was neatly tied in an updo. The hairstyle did little to hide the fact that her hair was damaged, even if it was done with a delicate touch.


    This life truly was distressing, yet so very refreshing.


    Witness. You are Ise Evans, Carynne Hares legal sister. Is that correct?


    Yes, thats right, sir.


    Ises voice trembled finely, and she sounded awkward. Carynne had never seen her be so nervous. It was also her first time seeing Ise in those clothes, and her first time hearing her speak in such a voice.


    Huh. There truly were some things that youd only get to see if you live long enough.


    Ises clothes werepletely devoid of any adornments. She was in just a neat, dark blue dress.


    Carynnes heart started pounding. That girls appearance in this courtroom was bound to be unfavorable to Carynne, but she couldnt stop her heart from racing.


    Up until three days ago, Miss Ise Evans had beenpletely unconscious for seven months, ever since the fire that broke out in the Hare manor.


    Hmm. It doesnt seem like shes well enough yet Will the witness be able to testify?


    When the judge asked, the prosecutor answered confidently.


    Of course, Your Honor.


    Ise Evans kept looking consciously towards Carynnes direction. With a weak gaze, the pupils of her eyes seemed to be quivering minutely.


    Carynne Hare No, Carynne Evans, my legal sister, is not a mentally unwell patient. Rather, she hasmitted the terrible crime of murder.


    So you mean to say that the defendant has intentionally killed someone?


    Ise Evans nodded.


    Yes, thats right.


    Ise Evans raised a hand and pointed her index finger directly at Carynne.


    And she continued in a crawling, trembling voice.


    Seven months ago, I saw her kill someone and set the mansion on fire.


    <i>t/n: *ace attorney ost pursuit~ cornered intensifies*</i>

 Chapter 135

    Chapter 135


    The entire courtroom was upended with a wave of confusion. They were all shocked. Their murmurs buzzed louder, their pointed fingers became more tant.


    Carynnes eyes twinkled. Shes finding Ises counterattack to be very interesting.


    However, there was no chance for Carynne to step forward here. People were now starting to talk about Carynne, Ise and Raymond alternately.


    Order! Order in the court!


    And no matter how loudly the judge hammered down his gavel, none of the people inside the hall listened. Likewise, the voice of Carynneswyer was buried. It took a while before thewyer managed to speak to the judge clearly.


    Your Honor, the witness testimony is wholly irrelevant to the case at hand.


    But the judge seemed to think otherwise. He shook his head.


    I dont believe its irrelevant to this case. Isnt the witness talking about the defendant?


    Thewyer grimaced a little for a moment, but he soon set down his documents and approached the witness stand, where Ise was sitting. ncing down at her, he slowly opened his lips to speak.


    Miss Ise Evans.


    Yes.


    Can you take responsibility for your words?


    O-Of course.


    Swiftly, thewyer asked another question.


    How long has it been since you regained consciousness?


    It has been about two days.


    And how long did youy unconscious?


    Seven months.


    At this, thewyer turned away from her and faced the judge and the jury.


    Dear members of the jury. We must first consider how far we can trust the testimony of a person who had been in aa for seven months.


    This was how the cross examination started.


    She is an adult who has enough wherewithal to make rational judgements. Your Honor, thewyer is unjustly attacking the character and credibility of the witness.


    Despite the prosecutors counter, the judge did not agree with that either.


    No. Its a matter for consideration.


    The prosecutor brought out another document for the judge to read. Frankly, the judge seemed to be a little fed up with the continuous stream of additional evidence. Its getting quite evident that someone was pulling some strings to overturn the original course of this trial.


    I would like to submit a doctors note. It states clearly that the witness is in good health, enough for her to make rational judgements.


    After skimming through the document that the prosecutor had presented, the judge nodded.


    Continue.


    Undeterred, thewyer went in on Ise Evans again. Her face was entirely stiff.


    You were originally engaged to Sir Raymond Saytes. Isnt that right?


    Ise hesitated a little before she replied.


    Yes, thats right.


    And youve been unconscious ever since the fire. For seven months.


    Yes, thats right.


    As Ise replied in a slightly more timid voice, thewyer pressed her further.


    While you were in aa due to the fire, a lot of things had changed in the meantime. Carynne Hare became Carynne Evans, and she is now engaged to the man who had once been your fianc.


    Thewyer fixed his stare on Ise Evans.


    Then, you must despise Carynne Evans very much, correct? Enough to say that you bear a grudge towards her.


    Uh, uh, yes, but


    Ises face turned pale.


    Your Honor, thewyer is repeatedly distressing the witness on purpose.


    But again, the judge disagreed with the prosecutor.


    We cannot ignore the fact that the witness has such a rtionship with the defendant.


    I, Im


    Ise flinched back slightly, and it was evident in her expression that she was feeling cornered. She looked at her father. <i>Help me, Father.</i>


    As expected.


    The moment he saw his daughter look at him, Verdic Evans stood up from his seat. As expected, Ise was still too young and weak. As her father, he needed to step up.


    To kill that red-haired witch.


    * * *


    Ise, Ise! Are you awake?


    Father? Mother?


    Verdic and his wife immediately drew Ise into a hug as they shed tears. Ise called out to them in a raspy voice, blinking dazedly as she was confused. Ises mother hugged her tightly and cried. Verdic, too, cried.


    Ise was finally awake. Their daughter, who had been lying unconscious for months on end, was finally awake.


    Locked in their embrace, Ises eyes went wide, and her face was painted with such confusion.


    Why Whats wrong?


    Her voice hadnt been used for so long now that whenever she spoke, she could only do so with a hoarse voicethat she herself loathed to hear. Ise frowned and touched her neck. She was still very confused. She just woke up from slumber, but her parents were holding her and weeping like this. Her head was spinning.


    Do you know how long its been since you werest awake?


    Huh?


    Ise did not seem to have a clue as to what this meant. After Verdic spoke, his wife soon gave the answer to Ise. She caressed her daughters cheek again and again.


    Its been seven months since you fell into aa, Ise.


    H-Huuuh? What?


    Incredibly perplexed, Ise sprang to her feet. However, her legs were still weak, so it wasnt long before she stumbled and copsed back. As she was sitting again, Ises mouth just gaped open. All too suddenly, her entire world was turned upside down. Seeing her daughter like this, Verdics wife shouted at a maid.


    W-Water!


    The maid then rushed to pour a ss of water, then brought it over to Ises unsteady hand. Ise hurriedly gulped down the honeyed water, coughing in between. She took a few more sips, then finally spoke.


    S-Seven months


    Yes. There was a fire at the Hare mansion, and you havent been conscious ever since then, Verdic exined to his daughter.


    Seven months


    Ise raised her head. Verdic and his wife were thrown into pity and sadness as they continued to hear how weak their daughters voice was. Much too many things happened while their daughter was asleep.


    So many things.


    T-Then how is Sir Raymond?


    Thats the question Verdic least wanted to hear from her, but In the end, she still asked it. Verdic sighed inwardly.


    In the end, he chose the wrong man for her. Now that he had to tell his daughter that Raymond and Carynne had gotten engaged, just as much as he was about to shatter his daughters heart, so too did his heart feel like its about to break.


    Ise.


    Verdic gently pushed her back so that she was lying down again. Its still too early for his daughter to be up when shes still sick.


    You dont have to care about him any longer.


    <i>I can just buy you a new one. </i>Verdic pressed down on the urge to cuss in front of his daughter.


    Its alright, its alright. There were plenty of other handsome men out there. Next time, Verdic would be sure to rein the next man in properly. So that he would not rise too high.


    Just focus on your health first and foremost.


    <i>Ill buy you a new man as soon as you get well.</i> Verdic vowed to himself.


    But Ise turned pale, and she called out to Verdic.


    F-Father.


    Ise clutched Verdics sleeve with trembling hands.


    Sir Raymond Did he p-pass away?


    Id rather that he <i>did.</i>


    Verdics wife scornfully admitted. She abhorred Raymond. She loathed Carynne. And she was absolutely disgusted by her own husbandthe very man who attracted the likes of those two vile people in the first ce.


    Verdic turned to his scowling wife.


    Honey!


    Verdic quietly seethed at his wife, but he saw that she was looking at their daughter with tears profusely streaming down her face. He gritted his teeth. He knew that his wife wasnt all too fond of their daughter, to the point that shed act like this.


    That man left you.


    Wife!


    M-Mother? WWhat are you talking about.


    Verdic grabbed his wifes shoulder.


    Ise just woke up.


    Is that important right now? Is <i>that man</i> important?


    Wife!


    Let go of me!


    She pped Verdics hand away, hard.


    Sir Raymond Saytes, that man you like so much. He is now engaged to another woman. Not you. Your Father brought in an adopted daughter for the sake of his business and arranged for that man to be engaged to <i>her.</i>

 Chapter 136

    Chapter 136


    Ise looked up at her mother with nk eyes. <i>Impossible. H-He </i>However, her mother uttered no words of denial, and soon Ise bowed her head.


    Impossible, she thought? No. Ise already knew. Raymond never once looked her way.


    I-Its only because I was unconscious, Ise murmured.


    She was entirely overwhelmed with despair. Verdic gestured to his wife. <i>Isnt it too early for our daughter to know?</i> But all his wife did in response was to re at Verdic as she rose from her seat. Then.


    <i>Bang!</i>


    She left, and the door closed behind her forcefully.


    Ise was flummoxed. She had just woken up, and too much had already happened. Ise sniffled and blew her nose into a handkerchief. Its just so difficult.


    W-What in the world happened


    Verdic sighed, preparing himself to exin. He would have to retell the events of the day she had copsed. Not about that wretched man.


    You couldnt wake up. Do you remember the fire that broke out in the Hare manor?


    Fire Ise repeated.


    Yes, its how Lord Hare and one servant boy died. Fortunately, Reverend Dun saved you, but its only today that you woke up.


    Is it because I inhaled too much smoke?


    Yes, I believe so. Raymond, that goddamn, empty-headed son of a bitch, no good for anything but his face. He


    Verdic stopped speaking.


    <i>He didnt save you, Ise. He saved Carynne.</i>


    And Verdic couldnt bear to tell his daughter that Raymond clearly favored Carynne more than his own betrothed. So, Verdic did not say anything more about Raymond.


    He couldnt save you. Instead, Reverend Dun has been taking care of you.


    Ise looked up at Verdic, baffled.


    Dun?


    Verdic went on to exin to his daughter again, as she didnt seem to recall who that man was. It must be because she had been asleep for far too long.


    That man, the one whos a little gloomy That is to say, Carynnes former fianc.


    I-I know who he is. You must be talking about that priest.


    Thats right. Do you remember now?


    As Ise cast down her eyes, a scowl soon formed on her face. For as long as she had slept, her mind was so foggy right now. Her head just went round and round with the words she had heard from her father.


    That her fianc, Sir Raymond, had left her.


    Sir Raymond What kind of woman is his fiance now?


    Stop thinking about that ursed man.


    Verdic felt his chest getting heavy as the fact that Carynne and Raymond were engaged was stamped across his mind.


    If he had known that Ise would open her eyes again like this, he would never have arranged for that engagement to happen.


    At that time, he truly thought that Ise wouldnt be able to open her eyes again. So, apart from the fact that his daughter would no longer rise from her sickbed again, all he could think about was a way to minimize his losses as efficiently as possible.


    This was his thought process when he eventually turned Carynne Hare into Carynne Evans so as to continue the engagement with Raymond.


    Verdic had invested too much into Raymond, and he poured so much money into the development of the Hare estate as well.


    It would just be too wasteful if he were to give up on all that.


    And Raymond was a little too good of an asset to let go of.


    I did something useless.


    He should have picked a more stupid man.


    Verdic already noticed that ambition had been rearing its head in Raymonds consciousness long ago. However, Verdic only thought him arrogant.


    But now that his daughter was awake, it was time for revenge.


    Tell me, Father, what kind of woman stole him from me? And Mother mentioned that I have I have a sister? Who is it?


    Ise persistently asked her father one question after another. Her eyes were filled with indignation.


    Verdic understood his daughters feelingshow vexed she must feel that her man had gotten engaged to another woman while she was in aa, trying to take her ce.


    He should give his daughter a chance at revenge.


    And so, Verdic revealed the truth.


    It is Carynne.


    At this, Ise looked up at Verdic,pletely perplexed.


    For a moment, he recalled that his daughter had been suffering from an inferiorityplex due to Carynnes beauty. How difficult this must be for her. Her man had been taken away, and her fortune had dwindled.


    Im sorry.


    His judgment was wrong. He should have prioritized his daughter first, not his business.


    He had given that man as a present to his daughter, so he should have let her keep him until the very end.


    Carynne Hare


    Verdic chest started hurting even more as he watched his daughters expression grow even more distorted. Right then, he approached his daughter, who was on the verge of shedding tears, and tried to console her.


    But then, Ise opened her mouth and yelled at the top of her lungs.


    A-AAAAAAH! Father! Father! Its her! Its <i>her,</i> Father!


    Ise cried bitterly.


    Carynne Hare! She tried to <i>kill</i> me!


    Verdics rage slowly started to boil over.


    Verdic was not a man who knew how to forgive. He wouldnt allow it.


    Carynnemitted a transgression against himself.


    That red-haired wench tried to kill Ise Evans and take her ce. And, she stole Raymond Saytes, who was Ise Evans man.


    Ever since Carynne left the Evans household with Raymond, Verdic had been suffering from something that brought him constant difort. It would not go away no matter what he did, even if Dun had prescribed him some medicine to drink every night.


    Ise, think of your own condition first.


    Three days was enough for Verdic to prepare.


    Until now, Verdic had been bribing various nobles, and amongst those people were the noblest of them allthe royal family.


    Crown Prince Gueuze had a predilection for spending far more than the budget thats allocated to him, and so Verdic lent him some money.


    Of course, there was little chance that the money he lent would evere back in his hands.


    Crown Prince Gueuze is exceptionally interested in Miss Carynne.


    Its be a rampant rumor that Crown Prince Gueuze was exceptionally interested in Raymonds fiance, and it all started when he crashed the tea party that his own son was hosting.


    People ate up that kind of story.


    The fact that Crown Prince Gueuze was lusting after Carynne quickly became widespread. And, naturally, it reached Verdics ears.


    I am Carynnes legal father.


    <i>If you want, Ill give her to you.</i>


    Of course, Crown Prince Gueuze also promised an abundance of rights to Verdic from this exchange. At this, Verdic rejoiced.


    It was known by practically everyone that Crown Prince Gueuze was a promiscuous man.


    The moment Verdic would hand over Carynne to him, hed receive both revenge and profit at the same time.


    Still, Verdic had a dilemmahow exactly should he hand over Carynne Hare? It wouldnt be easy for him to do so either, since she was currently residing at the countess mansion.


    However, it all worked out easily enough.


    Because Carynne Hare personally crept into the Evans mansion.


    So, Verdic decided to act right then, the moment Carynne had been found in Ise Evans, his daughters, room.


    Ever since Ise had woken up, she had been sleeping in her mothers room because she was afraid of sleeping alone.


    When she heard that Carynne had been found in her room, Ise waspletely stunned.


    She came into my room?


    Thats right.


    That, that woman is g-going to try and kill me again


    Even so, Verdic thought that it was a little strange.


    If Carynne had tried to kill Ise, she had plenty of chances before.


    There was no consistency in any of her actions.


    Why the hell had shee <i>now?</i>

 Chapter 137

    Chapter 137


    As Verdic worried over his thoughts, Dun helped him out.


    W-Werent you going to hand her over to Crown Prince Gueuze a-anyway?


    At this, Verdic nodded.


    Of course, yes.


    H-H-However, why dont you t-think about it a little more?


    Are you saying that I shouldnt?


    Verdic glowered at Dun, who was saying such strange nonsense. Now that he thought about it though, since Ises awake now, he no longer needed Dun.


    Its true that he often received sleeping pills or sedatives from him, but the priest also sometimes overstepped and would give excessive advice like this.


    I-Im not saying that. However Sir R-Raymond, he he came to see me.


    What was he thering on about now?


    Verdics frown grew deeper as he listened to Dun exin what had happened. Apparently, Raymond confided his worries about Carynne to the priest.


    Why did he approach you?


    He, he believes that Im still a-attached to Carynne.


    Ha, haha!


    So itse to this.


    Dun even talked more. Both he and Verdic thought of many ways to exact revenge.


    I-It might fail, but you n-n-never know.


    Raymond was in correspondence with Prince Lewis, and hes likely to act in order to take Carynne back from Crown Prince Gueuze. In other words, more preparations should be made to ensure that their revenge would be perfectly executed.


    Besides, Crown Prince Gueuze seemed to have been more amazed than Verdic at the sight of Duns tenacity about taking revenge against Carynne.


    And so, Verdic handed over Carynne to Crown Prince Gueuze.


    In the end, Verdic was a businessman. A diversified investment was the heart of trade. Verdic handed Carynne over to Crown Prince Gueuze while considering how to further pressure Raymond.


    Thats where Dun would help.


    * * *


    Your Honor, please take a look at this piece of evidence.


    The prosecutor took out more documents. At this, Verdic smirked. He allowed Ise the opportunity to take the stand as a witness so that his daughter could vent her anger in this way.


    Even so, Verdic had recruited not just one or two people.


    If Marquis Penceir was pressuring the jury, then Verdic was buying out people. Half of the attendees present in this courtroomregardless of their vested interestswere members of the House of Representatives. Their votes and the publics sentiment could not be totally ignored.


    Kill the witch!


    Death sentence! Death sentence! Death sentence!


    Bring down the iron mace of thew unto the wench!


    All the people shouting outside were people who Verdic bought, and they were holding a protest against Carynne Evans, who they despised. A few members of the jury whispered unpleasantly amongst themselves.


    The judge, too, frowned. This trial was not just any typical trial that could be judged simply by thew.


    The royals were involved. Apart from that, the wealth and dignity of the nobles were involved.


    The old judge was exhausted from the day-long trial. Its been turned upside down, over and over again.


    Then, just now, the prosecutor came up with conclusive evidence in favor of Verdic.


    This is the document that bolsters Carynne Evans insanity defense. It is fabricated.


    Hoh, what did you just say?


    The judge adjusted his sses, disgruntled.


    The document that the defendants fianc, Sir Raymond Saytes, had been written by the defendants former fianc, Dun Roid.


    Raymond gritted his teeth. Things were going further downhill. He immediately knew what the prosecutor was going to say next.


    Sir Raymond Saytes bribed Dun Roid with 10,000 gold coins. This is a clear fact that has been found in the bank statement that Verdic Evans has presented.


    In the end, much of Raymonds money came from Verdic Evans. It wouldnt be all too difficult for Verdic Evans to manipte a few little bank documents to prove that Raymond withdrew some money and gave it to Dun.


    At the Evans Bank, you mean.


    The judge adjusted his sses once more. Verdic noticed that the judge was trying to probe him. Digging a little deeper into the truth behind this piece of evidence would only put him at a disadvantage.


    What Verdic wanted here was a quick ruling.


    So, hes receiving some help.


    From that man, who was betrayed by Carynneand despised her.


    I would like to request Dun Roid to testify.


    <i>Screech.</i>


    It was a chair being pushed back.


    Raymonds teeth were clenched. Well, its only natural. He wouldnt have even expected this. Raymond waspletely mistaken about one certain thing.


    Raymond thought that he and Dun were in a cooperative rtionship. But in truth, it was Verdic and Dun.


    Perhaps Raymond thought that Dun had even a single ounce of love for Carynne, thats why.


    Verdic clicked his tongue. A nave knight like him should really stop regarding other people based on his own standards.


    <i>Creeeak.</i>


    Duns here.


    Verdic was quite partial to the priests wily nature.


    He walked up to the bible with deliberate and unhesitant steps. If looks could kill, then Raymonds re alone would have killed Dun right there and thenbut it was of no effect to Dun at all.


    He came out here donned in his ck priests robe and bright stole. He forced himself to stand upright with a straightened back, and so he looked taller than usual.


    There stood the young priest, who looked skinny and frail, but unlikely to utter a lie.


    Dun ced a hand over the bible and spoke.


    I do solemnly swear that I shall utter the whole truth and nothing but the truth before the presence of God.


    Then, he testified slowly but surely.


    Raymond Saytes coerced me into making a written document to prove Carynne Evans insanity. I swear in the name of God.


    The trial ended with that.


    Three times, the gavel rang.


    Carynne Evans was sentenced to death.


    * * *


    Verdic Evans left the bench, arranging his clothes. As the crowd started thinning out, the one whos left was Dun.


    He had returned to his usual self, abysmal posture and all. He looked morefortable standing with his shoulders hunched like that. Asfortable, perhaps, as lying tantly in everyones faces.


    Verdicughed.


    Thank you, Reverend Dun.


    Verdic offered a hand to Dun, and Dun shook it.


    We would have been in a pickle if not for your cooperation.


    Its not a b-big deal.


    Dun said this, but really, things wouldnt have been this smooth had he not intervened.


    In the end, Raymond Saytes did not buy out Dun. He seemed to genuinely think that his fiance has got a problem with her pretty little head.


    Even so, would that clear her of her sins?


    Verdic did not think so.


    Carynnemitted a crime.


    And it was the crime of making Verdic lose out on business.


    As promised your e-end of the deal.


    Yes, Reverend. Just as you requested, I shall file an appeal to have her be executed at <i>that</i> ce.


    Verdic grinned.


    I <i>am</i> Carynnes legal father, so I have the right to do so.


    Oh, how fun. This was the first time he felt delight at the fact that he had adopted Carynne. He had the right to do soto designate her ce of death.


    Verdic was ecstatic about being served this meal called revenge.


    And it was now time to feast.


    Verdic ordingly gave the priests share of the meal.


    Of course, I shall also have you be designated as the priest in charge of her final confession.


    Verdic quite liked this wily priest. He neatly put on his gloves and returned to his garish carriage. Theres something he still needs to see, so he had to follow through. And besides, Verdic was being apanied by soldiers that the king had assigned to him.


    If Raymond and the marquis wanted Carynne to live, then on the other side of the fence, Verdic and the reigning king wanted Carynne to die. The tug-of-war ended in thetters victory.


    Hmm, hmm.


    Verdic was in a good mood.


    Carynne Evans would be Duns ything until her final moments, and its only after shed been yed with so thoroughly that she would die.


    It was a miserable death fitting for an enemy who dared face Verdic.

 Chapter 138: 07. Wedding

    Chapter 138: 07. Wedding


    Carynne, bepletely honest with me on this one thing, please. Did you or did you not kill your father?


    Is that even important right now?


    Carynne watched idly as Raymond asked this as he grabbed her, and she fretfully rubbed the inside of her wrists. It felt stifling because they were tied so tightly with a rope.


    Carynne must now be on her way to prepare for her death sentence. However, Raymond caught her.


    Ive already been sentenced to death. The verdict wont be overturned.


    Please tell me.


    Who knows. Its alreadye to this.


    However, Raymond continued to look into Carynnes eyes and kept talking about the same thing.


    If you say you didnt, I wont give up on you.


    At this, Carynne sighed. Should she say that hes pitiful? Or pathetic?


    Raymond couldnt seem to ept the ending even though its already set. And he still had lingering feelings. Carynnes the one whos about to die here, yet Raymonds the one whos so worked up about it.


    What if you <i>wont</i> give up?


    Her words were sharp as she said this.


    Its been difficult. Its been hard enough to persevere until this point. Right now, Carynne found it difficult to endure her own sadness and silence. She was fully aware about how her future was forever locked in the chains of eternity. It was difficult enough to stay calm during the trial.


    Sir Raymond, will there be anything that can change your mind?


    Right now, even Raymond should know that there was no point in trying. Theres no need to waste any more of either of their time. Its over now.


    Just because you wont give up and wont stop trying, will anything change?


    Raymonds efforts were meaningless. Raymonds love was worthless.


    Even if hed try, Carynne would die. The death penalty would not be reversed. Also, even if the sky were to copse, Carynne would just continue to be in this endless cycle.


    Its time to go.


    The official executioners grabbed Carynne by the shoulder, which made her turn around. Raymond followed. He continued to follow her and said,


    If you say you didnt, Ill trust you.


    And what good would his trust give her? Carynne had an urge to answer him wickedly. However, the courtesy that she promised to give him squashed that urge.


    Carynne looked up at Raymonds face, and she replied.


    I did not kill my father. I did not start the fire.


    It was the truth anyway. She didnt kill her father. Well, she might have tried to kill him, but it was Tomnot Carynnewho did the fief lord in eventually.


    And it wasnt her who started the fire either, it was Dun. Not a single thing Ise said in her testimony was right. But lets just say that the girl didnt know anything.


    I.


    But Carynne hesitated before speaking.


    She couldnt speak.


    It was Nancy, not her father, who she clearly recalled killing. Just because Ise imed otherwise would not change Carynnes essence.


    Im, its just.


    She didnt wish to speak so pathetically. Besides, what could Raymond do now? The mansion had already been burned down to ashes, the verdict had already been handed down.


    Her time was already dawning to a close. And, once shes executed, she would be brought back to life and he would remember nothing about her. Its always been like that.


    But what about Raymond, here?


    She wondered if hed be able to live his life without remembering her, and if hed continue living in this life after her death. Carynne was curious about that.


    Nevertheless, she knew that she would never know.


    Would Raymond, who had confessed his love to her countless times now, still be the same person? Even if he looked the same, he would retain none of his memories.


    Raymond would never understand her.


    Time that was close to eternity would continue to flow between them.


    Carynne kept thinking about the life Raymond would have after her death. Whenpared to her time, as she would live forever, his life was only but a single moment.


    Carynne opened her lips to speak again.


    Ill just. Ill just say this.


    Dont think too much.


    Yes, I killed them all. Now, Sir Raymond. Live your life.


    Carynne concluded with this, then followed after the executioners. No matter what happened, she was under the impression that Raymond would live well enough.


    In fact, for a man of his stature, it would be rather difficult to live a terrible life. Would he marry another woman? Would he tie the knot with Ise? Considering the current situation, that would be a good thing.


    Forget about me.


    <i>Now isnt this quite touching.</i> Carynneughed inwardly. Shes sure that the courtesy she had shown thus far was sufficient. Next time, shes determined not to prize Raymonds face as muchshed just straight up lock him in a room. Right now, everything was detestable. She herself was shackled to eternity.


    Carynne went out of the courtroom and crossed the hall. The wind was cool on her skin. Time had passed before she knew it. Its soon her moment to die yet again, here in this life.


    <i>Trudge, trudge.</i>


    There were so many people out front earlier, but there was no one now. As if they all nned it.


    Get on, Carynne Evans.


    Yes.


    She got onto the carriage. The executioners didnt help her, so Carynne had to struggle a little to get inside. She staggered into the old, worn-out carriage. It creaked a lot. Then, as she sat down, she heard someone calling out to her.


    Carynne!


    It was Raymond. The carriage was about to start, but he interrupted it.


    Raymond climbed up the footstep to look through the carriage window.


    I didnt give any money to Reverend Dun. Because you really <i>have</i> gone crazy.


    Ah, sure.


    Puzzled, Carynne replied like so. But Raymond stared straight into Carynnes eyes and answered with frustrationcing his tone.


    So, I dont believe you. And I dont believe the priest. He lied to put you on death row.


    Carynne couldnt understand what kind of train of thought he had now, insisting that he didnt bribe Dun. Uh-huh, okay. Youre innocent.


    Looking at her quizzical expression, Raymond said to Carynne again.


    I wille and get you. Definitely.


    Im going away to die, Sir.


    Carynne, just stay alive until the very end. I will go to you.


    <i>Stop making such meaningless efforts.</i>


    Carynne tried to say this. But the carriage departed. The executioners had decided that it wasnt worth wasting any more time here.


    Touching, isnt it? Im quite the sinful woman.


    Carynne murmured to the man next to her. The man on her other side drew the windows curtains, aghast.


    We need to strengthen the security.


    Carynne agreed.


    * * *


    Carynne arrived at her ce of execution. But wasnt her death sentence supposed to be carried out three dayster? As the carriage arrived at its destination, Carynne looked up at the old tower, arching her sore back.


    Whos going to execute me? Will I be beheaded or will I be hanged? Or, Im not going to be shot, am I?


    Are you not allowed to tell me?


    The man kept his mouth shut. Carynne was all tied up with a rope, and she was being dragged away by the man pulling the other end. Barracks had been set up at a nearby vacant lot. She thought shed just have a nice, quiet execution, but she was surprised to see that there were more people camped out here than she expected.


    Still though, Carynne was not led to the barracks nor to the gallows set up at the square. The man pointed towards the tower, not the clearing. It was an old, white tower. Her neck started hurting as she looked up. She had never died at a ce like this before.


    She was led to the towers entrance below.


    Go up, the man ordered her from behind.


    All the way to the top?


    Carynne could only sigh as she saw the countless steps going up in front of her. When exactly would she finish climbing all those steps? <i>Cmon, just hang me.</i>


    She turned her head and asked the man.


    Are youing with me?


    <i>Bang!</i>


    The door mmed shut behind her. Then, she heard the lock being fastened.


    Hey, be rational here Untie me at least.


    <i>No one else is going. Im going up on my own.</i>


    Carynne kicked the door with her foot. Rather than the door suffering any damage, only her foot got hurt. She let out a long, drawn-out sigh as she stared at the rope thats keeping her wrists tightly bound. All she wanted was to die and lie down, but shes not even allowed that leisure.


    Carynne had to be Ises maid, had to stand trial, and had to wait for her death sentence.


    What kind of life even is this.


    Oh, how nice would it be to just get it over withto have her head lopped off right now!


    Carynne sighed. Nheless, she climbed the steps.

 Chapter 139

    Chapter 139


    <i>Ta-dak, tadak.</i>


    Carynne climbed up the towers spiral staircase, which seemingly went up and up and up endlessly. Still, rather than a ce of execution, it seemed to serve as a steadfast marker in the middle of the woods.


    It was quite high. Her legs were starting to ache from all her climbing. She stopped.


    Its filthy


    There was blood on the walls of the staircase. It seemed like they didnte in to clean this ce often. Judging the height of the old bloodstains here, which were all brown and dried up, Carynne tried to make a guess on the height.


    That is, the height of the person who died in this ce earlier before herself. By her estimate, perhaps he had been a man of great stature. And he seemed to have struggled a lot before he kicked the bucket. Up top, there were quite a few messy marks left behind.


    If she were to be told to die neatly, then so she shall. Its fortunate enough that Verdic Evans wasnt going toe to this ce. She hated his presence at this time the most. Because she knew for sure that hed deliberately bring a rusty, blunt axe to off her.


    Wonder if its through hanging again this time.


    As she was still on her way up the stairs, Carynne eventually came across a small window. Well, its rather generous to call it a window since the breadth of barely one arm could pass through it. Even so, there was enough space for a person to look through.


    Carynne stared out the window.


    Called it. Yep, hanging this time.


    What she didnt expect though was that there were more people here to witness her death. The barracks nearby seemed to have been erected for a much longer stay. Still a lot less peoplepared to downtown though.


    Carynne thought of it in a good wayhow great was it that this huge crowd hade here especially to see her corpse? Truly, the bodies of women on death row could be used in various ways, not only as a spectacle.


    Ha, haa. My legs hurt like hell.


    Finally, she reached the top. Carynne stood in front of the top floors sole door. There was just one room here. Was she going to get executed after staying here? The door was utched. Carynne entered the room. And she scowled.


    Why are <i>you</i> here?


    There was a man in a room.


    One with an ever so familiar face.


    Dun.


    Something felt off for Carynne here.


    As Dun was sitting inside the room until now, he rose to his feet and walked towards her.


    I, Im here as the p-priest in charge of of your final confession.


    Then, he untied the ropes on Carynnes wrists. She wrapped a hand around one of her tingling wrists. Was it a good thing that <i>he</i> was here and not someone else? But, in any case, what meaning would there be that its not just some acquaintance, but Dun himself?


    Ha. Sure. Whatever.


    I got dragged here as soon as I was sentenced to death. Its driving me nuts.


    Yes.


    Carynne sat down in the chair, still touching her tingling wrists. Dun remained standing as there was only one chair inside the room. She looked up at Dun.


    Theres something Im curious about.


    Are executions usually conducted like this? Ive watched a few other people get executed, but its my first time experiencing it myself. From what I gather, the more known the criminal is, the bigger the audience would be so that the criminal can be made an example.


    Carynne looked out of the window as she said this. This top floor was bigger and brighter than she had expected.


    I dont think this is how its usually conducted for those sentenced to death.


    T-Thats what youre curious about?


    Yeah.


    Dun graciously answered her.


    I-I asked Mister Verdic to organize this.


    To have my execution done here?


    T-Thats right.


    Why?


    So So I can t-take it out on you be, before you d-die.


    Carynne blinked.


    Wow.


    You volunteered to do that?


    Dun nodded.


    Th, Thats right.


    Carynne was dumbfounded.


    Mmh, so what youre saying is, before I die Ah, I got it.


    She knew it all too well. Carynne was well aware. Unlucky young women were always in danger of this method. And among all unlucky women, she was one of the unluckiest.


    But of all people, for Dun to say such a thingCarynne was furious.


    So what are you going to do to me?


    Carynne tore a hand through her hair. An amalgamation of anger and irritation rose within her, and it was difficult to suppress.


    She did not know why Dunwho knew the truth behind her situationwas being like this to her. If he were to just let her die roughly, wasnt she going to hell anyway?


    Then why dont you take off your clothes now? Ah, seriously. Im tired enough with Sir Raymond. Mister Verdics annoying, too. Im going to be executed soon. Why are you all irritating me so much until the bitter end?


    Carynne jumped out of her seat and grabbed Dun by the cor.


    Hey, just y with my corpse after I die. Im too tired to do it right now. Why the hell are you doing this to me? Huh?


    Carynne was furious. Thus far, Carynne had not felt such anger at Dun because of the many eventful things that had been happening one after another until now. And because Carynne was in a situation where she really cant get all too angry.


    L-Let go of me.


    But after everything that Dun did to her, Carynne could not help but get angry.


    You sent me to Crown Prince Gueuze, you brought Ise back to life, you put me on death rowyouve just been dragging me here and there. Why are you so annoying? Huh? After this, what? You wanna relieve your lust before I die?


    <i>SLAP!</i>


    Carynne grabbed Dun by the cor and pped him hard on one cheek.


    From the beginning From the very beginning! I, I told you that Id spread my legs for you if you want to sleep with me! Youre the one who didnt want to! Its all over! Youre useless! Just let me die already!


    N-No.


    Dun grabbed Carynnes wrist. His strength overpowered her. He pressed Carynne down by her shoulder.


    You, you havent answered me yet.


    As Dun looked down at her and she red up at him, she tried to calm her wheezing breath. She wanted to lop off Duns head here and now. If only she could.


    What.


    True love.


    Carynne red viciously at Dun, but he merely stared at her with those ck eyes, like endless chasms.


    D-Does Sir Raymond love you?


    You havent answered yet.


    Our wager is not yet over.


    * * *


    What do I do


    Ise bit her nails anxiously. She paced back and forth inside one of the tents in the barracks. Too much happened while she was in thata. Ise still could not believe that she had slept for seven months.


    Lily! Lily!


    Y-Youre not there?


    Ise became discouraged when she realized that her maid did note. Its ufortable. Its really ufortable in this tent.


    Ise really didnt want toe here, but going out of her way to watch was her dutyher duty to carry out the revenge that her father spoke of. Ise had to take revenge against Carynne, and she would see the culmination of her revenge here.


    Ise was not ready yet. Ise couldnt bear to see injuries, let alone a corpse. However, Verdic refused to allow any more childishness from her. After all, she had be an adult already.


    Ise, stop biting your nails. Its not a good look.


    Verdic rebuked her from the moment he stepped into the tent.


    I-Im sorry.


    Ise took her thumb out of her mouth. Its not long ago when Verdic had vowed to stop scolding his daughter, but it didntst long.


    Ise looked around and asked.


    Father, what about Mother? Shes noting?


    That womans good at leaving the house, in any case.


    Verdic replied curtly.


    Shes noting


    Rather than her father, Ise wanted to see her mother more. She felt so anxious. Ise usually relied on Verdic more, but ever since she woke up from hera, her father had be so frightening, and so unfamiliar.


    Were going back home soon, too.


    Okay


    With tears welling up in her eyes as she looked up at her father, she answered.


    Ises scared. Shes scared now, and shes scared of whats toe.


    Were going back as soon as its over.


    Verdics voice was gentle, but his words were certainly not. He never once suggested that his daughter could go back and rest up first.


    As soon as its over.


    Verdic said this once more as he stared at the tower. His eyes contained firm resolve. Ise wiped off her sweaty palm on her skirt. Whenever her father had that expression on his face, something bad always happened.


    Look over there. Our revenge has already begun.


    Inside that tower was Carynne. Ises legal sister. Ises nemesis. A murderer who killed several people.


    Ise and Verdic were waiting outside the tower to see that young woman get hanged.

 Chapter 140

    Chapter 140


    Im scared


    Verdic clearly had no intention of going back home until hed get to see that girls neck hanging on a rope.


    Ise nervously observed her fathers expression, then she eventually tried to bring up what shed been thinking all along.


    Father


    What, snapped Verdic as he was still ring at the spire.


    I-Im scared.


    Theres nothing for you to be scared of. Its all over now.


    Ise shook her head. The one shes afraid of was the man in front of her.


    But hes her father. She shouldnt be scared of him. There was something scarier than him.


    Father, I Did I see it correctly?


    Ise was not confident with her own memories.


    Did I Did I surely see those things?


    What are you thering on about now.


    Verdic raised his tone. Ise hesitated before she replied.


    I dont even remember the fire Surely, I Then Carynne with Lord Hare. I saw her in that room with her father. But I didnt see the exact moment she killed him.


    Verdic jabbed a finger into Ises shoulder and said,


    You had an injury. Didnt you say that it was Carynne who did that to you?


    Y-Yes, it was her.


    At this, Ise nodded vigorously.


    But that was the only thing she was sure of.


    As soon as she had woken up, she heard the news of her broken engagementthat Raymond Saytes was now betrothed to Carynne, not herself.


    So, with a frantically high-pitched voice, she recounted the events of that night.


    Carynne ran after her along a dark hallway, red hair flowing behind her. Endlessly, endlessly, the chase went on. She wasughing. The hallway was too dark. It wouldnt end.


    Surely that girl didnt


    Ise finally woke up from her nightmare. She hugged herself, hands on her trembling shoulders. Even after she had woken up already, fear had yet to leave her.


    A new fear instead dawned upon her.


    I didnt see with my own eyes that she killed What if I What if I saw it wrong?


    Things had grown out of proportion.


    At that courthouse, Raymond was staring at her, when those countless aristocrats had their full attention on her she felt utterly devastated.


    Did she really tell the truth and nothing but the truth?


    Really?


    Ise, Ise.


    Verdic took a step closer to his daughter. Then, he wrapped his arms around the girls quivering shoulders. Verdic gentlyforted her.


    Youre being much too kind-hearted to the point that its an illness.


    B-But, Father


    Her tremors would not stop. Ise had been under pressure to speak. She hated Carynne. She loathed the girl so much that she wanted to kill the girl for stealing away her fianc.


    And shes scared of Carynne. She wishedprayedthat the girl would disappear from this world.


    Im scared


    However,ing personally to the site of Carynnes imminent death, just waiting for her neck to be hanged This was another matter altogether.


    For her to wait here, twiddling her thumbs, toy her own eyes upon a real corpseits something she never thought of.


    I-Its still too much for me to handle, Father.


    This entire situation was too much. Ise felt that she was still too young for this. Things had gotten out of hand.


    Even so, Verdic remained adamant.


    Youre old enough to see your enemys corpse and check whether shes really dead. Youre already an adult.


    Ise could not stop trembling. Verdic continued speaking.


    Ise.


    Yes, Father.


    What are you so scared of? It is the truth that Carynne had killed before, just as much as it is the truth that she had hurt you. Take revenge for thatrip her flesh apart. After all, you are my daughter.


    Ise shook her head.


    What if I saw it wrong?


    Thats possible, yes.


    Verdic nodded. Ise was astounded. Its possible?


    He repeated it once more.


    Its possible that you might have seen it wrong, yes. Its not an easy feat for a teenage girl to kill her fully adult father.


    Had he taken this under consideration from the beginning? He already expected it?


    B-But If thats the case


    Enough.


    Verdic sternly replied.


    Does that change the fact that she caused <i>you</i> harm?


    I can forgive you, my daughter, for making mistakes. But I cannot ever allow anyone else to harm <i>us.</i>


    Father!


    Verdic was unyielding. But Ise had to say what she needed to say. In the pastno, even now. Her father had always been like this. But she had to say it.


    Because shes terrified.


    I, I Thest thing I saw before I fell unconscious was a man not a woman.


    Yes, its clear that it was Sir Raymond Saytes.


    Blue mes erupted in Verdics eyes.


    He didnt save youhe saved that red-haired wench. He must have left you there on purpose.


    <i>No, Father.</i>


    Ise knew thats not what happened. Even after everything, Raymond wouldnt abandon her there. Ise was certain that he wouldnt be able to do so.


    Raymond was the kind of knight whod walk up to his enemy and say, You paid the wrong price.


    I just dont know! What if What if Father, Im just asking <i>what if.</i>


    Ise gulped nervously. Shes horrendously anxious. Shes utterly terrified.


    What shes afraid of was not Carynne.


    What if Dun Roid was the man who strangled me?


    Ise was terrified of <i>that.</i>


    She vaguely recalled the voice of that man.


    I warned you. Dont pay attention to useless things.


    Wasnt it Dun who strangled her?


    T-Then.


    Ise was terrified of this doubt festering within her. And she was even more afraid because she couldnt get a read on that man.


    Raymond was rather easy to understand. Hes not happy with Ise because of Verdic. She knew that. She <i>already knew</i>.


    But with Dun If the one who had strangled her was that hunched, sickly pale priest


    Didnt this mean that he was the one who kept her unconscious and also willed her awake, all due to his own agenda?


    Why are you bringing up Dun Roid?


    Ise was terrified. Because she couldnt even form one single guess.


    Ise.


    Verdic embraced his daughters trembling shoulders. His hold on her was firm. And, at the same time, his hold on her was cruel.


    He gradually raised his hunched daughter and said,


    Do you think that Dun Roid, that priest, would have been able to manipte this father of yours?


    <i>Hup.</i>


    Ise was terrified because that man had been next to her father far too long. And she was terrified because that man was the one who tended to her all this time.


    By no means could that man possibly be a good man. So, she despised him.


    Ise, theres nothing for you to be scared of. Isnt it obvious what Dun is doing to Carynne inside that tower?


    One thought passed through Ises mind, that her fathers hands felt disgusting. If her mother was here in front of her, she wouldnt have chosen tofort her in this way. Any woman would not use this method for revenge.


    But this was what Verdic chose.


    You think Dun manipted me? Really?


    Verdic chuckled. Then, he looked at the spire.


    Now that youre awake, I dont need him.


    Id like to see him try.


    * * *


    Carynne stared at Dun, speechless. Its impossible to figure him out. Hes always been so maniptive.


    Just what are you talking about right now.


    Tell me.


    Its alreadye to this, but what kind of drivel are you spouting now!


    Carynne was furious.


    Are you kidding me? Why the hell are you saying such bullshit <i>now?</i> The truth Isnt it clear what the truth is? I repeat the same life over and over again. I thought I had fallen into a novel, but thats nothing but mere delusion. To put an end to these never-ending loops, I have to give birth to a child and pass on the curse to them. But its impossible for all this to end because Im barren. This is a fact that you, Dun, admitted to me before the trial.


    You speak of love to <i>me?</i> SHUT UP! Just why the hell are you doing this to me until now!


    But Dun kept looking down from above at Carynne. He did not waver.


    T-The wager is not over yet.


    Was there hope? Carynne stared at Dun. Was there a way for her to get an answer? Carynne mulled it over.


    Ah, I should have killed Dun at the start. No, I wouldnt be able to get an answer if I killed him first.


    Dun, Dun.


    What should I do with you?


    <i>Tak.</i>


    I love him.


    But she must answer first.


    Carynne replied, schooling her features into a serious expression.


    I love Sir Raymond. Youre a witness to it, too.


    You saw it. Look at how much he had given up for me after the few months that we were together. He sacrificed all that, only to be left with nothing. Even now He told me to wait no matter what until the end. He said that he would definitelye get me.


    Carynne dug through her thoughts.


    What else was there?


    There was nothing I could offer him in return, but he did all that for me. How could it <i>not</i> be love when he did that much?


    N-Not that man, Dun countered. Y-You. How do you feel?


    Carynne clutched her skirt tightly before answering.


    I love him back, of course. How can I not love a man whos wholly dedicated to his sacrifice to me


    But Dun did not answer.


    He got up. Carynne clung to him.


    Wait, wait. No. Dun. I love <i>you.</i> I was wrong. I dont love Sir Raymond. I love you, <i>you.</i> Help me.


    Duns face became distorted. Carynne took one look at that expression and decided to cut with the bullshit that wasnt even funny.


    Everythings wrong from the start so why. Why did she keep trying to find hope. Why was she so foolish.


    Fine, I get it.


    Carynne lowered her head.


    I dont have the ability to love. Maybe. Its just Whether the other persons good or bad, its just not right, so I have not loved.


    Carynne admitted it. No other man who loved her that much would ever show up. Her time was limited. And, not only in this life, but didnt she confirm it over and over before? How many times. Oh, how many times was it.


    Raymond never ended up hating Carynneit was like that, again this time. No matter what she did. Even if she had killed.


    So, she did not choose. Its for this reason that she took this whole world for granted. All this time, hadnt she been thinking that this was all just a novel?


    Raymond did his very best, always. To the point that she thought its fascinating to watch.


    Her knight. Her male lead.


    But I cannot love him.


    In just a little while, he would forget Carynne.


    Whats the point int doing that


    Yet again, the narrative would scatter. Time would rewind itself and bring her back to the beginning.


    None of those efforts, none of those affections, none of those duties, and none of that hatred.


    Everything would disappear. All of the rtionships she had built would copse.


    So, Carynne could not love.


    Never.


    Her time did not continue. In the end, no one would be able to understand her. No one would live this resetting life with her. She would be alone evermore.


    Love is something that happens between two human beings. It cant happen between a human and a fictional character. Ive been told that the notion that this world is a novel is false. But what? That changes nothing. No one can share this worldthis experiencewith me.


    From the very beginning, this wager between them was inapplicable.

 Chapter 141

    Chapter 141


    Verdic slipped a letter to Dun, there into the tower. He did not know whether the priest would read it or not.


    His patience was running out.


    I cant wait any longer than this.


    If he could not see Carynne Hares neck being hung any time soon, he would go to her and lop off her head himself.


    And so, he told the soldiers to stand readyto break down the towers front door.


    * * *


    If youre here to persuade me, you should just give up.


    This was what Raymond was met with the moment he opened the door.


    Marquis Penceir.


    Ive done enough.


    As if he had eaten rotten food, there was a sour look in the marquiss eyes as he eyed the younger man. Raymond was already expecting his reaction.


    The marquis waved one hand and sincerely advised him.


    And <i>youve</i> done enough as well. Forget about her now.


    Marquis.


    Im not angry with you now only because I believe youve been deceived.


    Raymond did not answer. He did not know what to say to him. Despite what he said, the marquis looked quite angry.


    Not only you, but I, too, had gone too far. I kept the fact that shes Catherines daughter in my mind. I upheld my friendship with her mother. But I cant do more than that.


    No, to be precise, theres truly nothing that can be done about it The death sentence has already been handed down, so what else could be done? Its all over now. You know who the members of the jury are. Theyre all prominent aristocratssome of them members of the Assembly as well. I talked to all those high nobles beforehand, but then what? Im the only one whos be aughingstock in the end.


    With a severe scowl donned upon his face, Marquis Penceir walked up to Raymond and jabbed a finger at the young mans shoulder with much force.


    Go back to the military again for a year. Theres something I want you to do.


    No, youre <i>obligated</i> to do so. Just disclosing Crown Prince Gueuzes hobbies had put me in a difficult spot with His Majesty.


    <i>But it would benefit you as the new king anyway. </i>This was what Raymond thought as he listened to Marquis Penceir speak as though he had suffered a great loss to grant a favor for Raymonds sake. In the end, the marquis was a politician. He would no longer invest more into Raymond.


    Dont even think about it. I can practically read your mind right now.


    But what more could Raymond do here? The future king himself was saying that there was no hope left.


    Marquis Penceir patted Raymond, who was still standing, on the shoulder.


    I was wrong about you. You dont have an eye for women at all.


    ..


    Really. Youve done enough.


    With a rather carefree expression, the marquis turned away from Raymond.


    But as he walked away, behind him, Raymond spoke up.


    I understand, Marquis. But theres still something that I must do before I return to my post.


    Immediately after, Raymond turned away as well, but the marquis hastily looked sideways to face the young man. It felt unpleasant that he wasnt listening to his advice.


    What are you going to do? It would be better for you to just stay still.


    I shall go there independently.


    Where?


    The gallows.


    Thats terrible. Do you <i>want</i> to see your own fiances neck being hung?


    No.


    In his mind, Raymond calcted the amount of gunpowder he could get his hands on.


    I shall go there. Independently.


    Youve gone mad. Do you think Ill let you? Shes on death row now.


    Marquis, its for that precise reason that Im telling you in advance.


    Then, after a pause, Raymond asked.


    How many people are on death row, sir?


    Did you not hear a single word I told you just now?


    Thest time I checked, there were a lot of people gathered there, but the official state executioners were nowhere to be found.


    Sir Raymond.


    Even if ites to a point that I might face my own death, I will take care of it in a way that you will not be implicated, Marquis.


    Youre still young, Raymond. Just calm down for now.


    I wonder, Marquis. Would there be a single soldier there?


    <i>BANG!</i> The marquis hit the table forcefully with both hands. Raymond was being too hasty right now.


    I dont know what youre even talking about. Why would soldiers be sent there?


    Then, even if I kill everyone there, you will not be swept into the mess, Marquis.


    Raymond!


    The marquis bellowed, but Raymond continued.


    Isnt it strange that a woman was dragged there to be executed, yet its a troop of mercenaries that are standing guard?


    Raymond absolutely despised Verdic. He couldnt help but think, why did Verdic go there? Why would he drag Carynne to that ce to kill her?


    It is my responsibility.


    Raymond recalled what had happened to Carynnes backthe open wounds and gashes that had been inflicted upon her, clearly with malice.


    Right now, Carynne was his responsibility. If Raymond had instead been involved with another woman, Carynne would have married another man normally, even if her household had just fallen to ruin.


    It was a truth that Raymond knew very well.


    Raymond harbored within him the very reasons why he <i>must</i> go there.


    Its out of your hands now.


    She is my fiance.


    <i>Shes his choice.</i>


    What do you n to do all alone? Think about the life ahead of you. Think about just how short of a time its been since you first met her. Isnt your goal to see through Verdics demise? Just what the hell are you nning to do now? Its impossible. You cant even sneak in.


    Raymond bowed to the marquis.


    Truthfully, sir, Ive already decided.


    Then why did you evene here.


    Raymond pointed his finger out the window and dered,


    To borrow some gunpowder.


    The marquis hurriedly went to the window and opened it. The first thing he saw was a carriage that was carrying something through the gates.


    Raymond had long since rushed out of the door before the marquis could even turn around and shout,


    SIR RAYMOND!


    Ive worked quite a lot without receiving anypensation thus far, so please allow me to be paid this much in advance.


    STOP WHERE YOU ARE!


    But Raymond did not listen. From the very beginning, he already knew that it would be impossible to persuade the marquis.


    How could Raymond persuade others when he could no longer persuade himself?


    Xenon, lets go!


    Raymond was well aware.


    There was no benefit to doing this. There would be no honor. Everything he had built up would be blown away.


    Whats worse, even Carynne had not told him toe.


    I killed them all.


    This was what Carynne confessed, but Raymond did not believe this.


    Raymond never bribed Dun with money. Dun lied, Verdic manipted the situation. This was the absolute truth. Carynne was a victim to Verdic, who did everything in his power to make sure that she would be handed down the death penalty.


    So, no. He did not believe Carynne. He did not believe that confession.


    And, because he didnt believe it, Raymond was able to move ording to his own will.


    * * *


    At dawn, Carynne woke up to a loud noise. The sun was rising.


    Ah, its time for me to die. How much time had passed? Where will it happen this time? How old am I now?


    She was so utterly exhausted that time idled away, but someone was jostling her awake.


    WWake up, Carynne.


    What now.


    Carynne rubbed her eyes. Dun shook her shoulder. It was still so early in the morning.


    If youre going to kill me anyway, cant you just do it while Im sleeping?


    need time.


    Dun mumbled something vague. Carynne sat up on the bed. The sky hadnt even lit up yet.


    Unlike Carynne, Dun did not sleep a wink. His pale face was almost as dreadfully horrid as a corpse. While sitting up now, she asked him.


    Are you the one wholl execute me?


    I-Im meant to do it, yes T-Thats what I told Mister Verdic.


    Then why dont you just do it already? I really dont like Mister Verdics axe.


    T-The wager.


    Carynne tugged at Duns hair.


    I lost, didnt I?


    Its all over now.


    Carynne admitted that she did not love Raymond. She did not have the capability of loving <i>anyone</i> at all because love was between two human beings. She vowed to try harder to trick Dun next time, but in this iteration, she could not.


    Her initial n was to kill people and run wild, but this life of hers made a mess out of everything.


    But I dont regret killing those people though?


    To be honest, I feel that its a shame how I couldnt kill more. Why am I so weak. Next time, I gotta try killing Verdic.


    Carynne grumbled. However, she flinched when Dun pulled her nket away.


    Hey, its cold?


    Get up.


    Why.


    V-Verdic ising.


    Right then, Carynne heard a faint thumping sound. Her face turned as white as a sheet.


    The time hase. Already? <i>Already?</i> Im going to die now. Its over now.


    G-Get up and move to the window.


    At Duns instruction, Carynne hurriedly opened the window. The bitingly cold, morning air pierced through the room. As she looked out the window, it felt as if she was standing on a cliff.


    She heard the wildly roaring wind around her. She looked at Dun, who was pulling the bed towards the door to block it. From a distance, she could hear the faint sound of the towers front door being forced open.


    Carynne could not understand Duns actions.


    What are you doing?


    B-Buying some time.


    To escape from Verdic? Do you think thats even possible? No, in the first ce <i>Youre</i> the one who dragged me here.


    Carynne observed Duns unreadable expression. She could not figure out what he was thinking.


    L-Look out the window.


    So she did. As she took a step closer to the window, she saw that Verdics barracks had been set aze. Carynne held her fluttering hair and tossed it behind her. She could not figure out how it hade to this.


    Then, Carynne saw him.


    Her knight.

 Chapter 142

    Chapter 142


    Raymond raised his gun.


    He stood here alone, an army by himself.


    He began by sniping. Then, Raymond detonated the bombs at dawn. Zion helped him in that regard.


    I cant go on anymore, sir.


    Zion grumbled the entire time, but in the end, he still went on to nt all that gunpowder, retreated, then started blowing them up. Slowly but surely, the fire began to spread, and people woke up screaming. Raymond aimed his gun at all the people who rushed out of their burning cots.


    One, two, three down.


    Stop! <i>Stop!</i> Theres a sniper!


    People floundered and lowered themselves. The heads that he was about to shoot hurriedly disappeared. He clicked his tongue. He shot down seven, but he was still a long way off. Raymond observed those peoples faces and clothes from a distance.


    They were wearing civilian clothes, but just as he had expected, their movements were clearly that of trained soldiers. Even though no soldiers had officially been reported to havee here.


    I knew it, His Majestys enraged.


    It looked like the current reigning king told them all to make absolutely sure that Carynne woulde out of this dead.


    Raymond loaded his gun.


    He had enough ammunition.


    * * *


    Sir Raymond came.


    Carynne could tell.


    She could just tell.


    He must be crazy.


    Carynne stopped hanging out of the window. She could notprehend why he was here. No, scratch that. She knew exactly whybecause he loved her. Why. Why did he say he loved her. Carynne could not figure out the reason behind this.


    She thought hed bete again this time.


    In this iteration, somehow, all the events happened a little too fast.


    Carynne murmured to herself.


    Perhaps its because she killed people in this iteration, but its undeniable that everything was happening a bit too quickly than any other time. She entered Ises household early, Raymond started to sympathize with her early because of the abuse she had received, and even his confession of love arrived earlier than it should have.


    But.


    But whats the point of that? Shes going to die again this time anyway.


    Even so, Carynne wanted to uphold her courtesy towards him again. At one point or another, she became resolved about the intention to die next to him in this iterationif she really was meant to die.


    Carynne turned to face Dun. He was still piling up everything in the room in front of the door.


    Dun. Sir Raymond is here.


    Yes.


    Sir Raymond is here. I told him not toe.


    Carynne felt depressed again. This time again, he came to her side. This time again, he had fallen in love with a woman who would drag him down to hell with her, a woman who would do him no good at all.


    And Carynne could not give anything back to himnot even emotions.


    But this was new and this was burdensome.


    She could never return the same weight of emotions she was given.


    Still, one things for sure.


    There was one single emotion that remained true. One emotion that she couldnt let gonot when she had pointed a knife at Tom, now when she pointed a knife at Donna, not when she tried to surrender herselfpletely to madness.


    I pity him.


    She would never be able to think of him as a human being. Thus, she felt pity for him as she watched him make all these meaningless efforts.


    This shallow pity was the single, undeniable truth she held onto.


    He would forget everything once she resets. Thats what Carynne really, really hated the most.


    I wish that Sir Raymond will remember me.


    Right.


    Dun replied to Carynne.


    Strangely enough, Duns voice was peaceful. It was her first time to hear such tranquility from him.


    <i>Thu-dud, crack!</i>


    Open up!


    At that moment, she heard the rooms door being broken apart. Verdic was now standing outside the door, axe in hand.


    Once that door was pried open, she would die.


    Carynne asked Dun.


    Why are you here, doing this?


    Why was he here? Carynne wondered.


    But he did not answer. Contrary to what he told Verdic, he never touched Carynne. All he did was ask questions.


    Dun nced at the door and told her,


    I-Im estimating the time.


    What time.


    Carynne asked Dun.


    And Dun answered Carynne.


    The time for you to die.


    * * *


    That pair of wretched mongrels.


    Verdic gnashed his mrs. Its obvious just who was pointing his gun at this ceRaymond Saytes, that goddamn son of a bitch.


    All around him were the civilian-clothed soldiers that the current king had deployed at this ce, so it was absolutely ridiculous that this was happening. If not for them, all of Verdics own private soldiers would have been killed.


    I shall make sure to take care of the matter, just as you have ordered, Your Majesty.


    Of course he should. Senile and on the verge of death as he was, the current king still held much influence. Verdic was a foreign merchant who had no roots in this country, but he sympathized with the old man who had lost his children.


    So, he would make sure that the one whos been dragged here would <i>not</i> die in peace.


    What do you think is the situation like now?


    When Verdic asked, the soldier answered briefly, discontent apparent in his tone.


    Mister Verdic Evans, you should have cut her throat the first chance you got and sent her head to His Majesty.


    So its not good, it seems.


    As they both gauged the situation, the soldier was somehow trying to pass off the me to him, and Verdic nced at him once, thinking that he was pathetic. Right after, he shouted at the coachman.


    Take Ise and escape! Im going to wrap this up!


    Ise ran out, her face deathly pale. Verdic grabbed Ise by her forearm.


    The situation has gone downhill. Ill just show you that wenchs headter.


    F-Father. What in the world is going on?


    I said <i>go.</i> Raymond, that son of a bitch. Looks like hes here.


    That jackass should have loved his daughter. He must pay back what he owed. Verdic gritted his teeth.


    GO!


    Verdic pushed Ise into the carriage, but she begged him.


    Father, escape with me, please!


    Ise clung to Verdic by the sleeve, but he merely pped his daughters hand away.


    I will not leave until I hack away at her neck myself.


    Verdics eyes werepletely bloodshot. He did not sleep properly at all, and some gunpowder had flown into his eyes.


    Verdic felt as if she had been born for the purpose of ughtering that girlthat red-haired wench.


    He would never leave until he had cut off her head personally.


    Father, lets just go back. Its too dangerous!


    Start the carriage and set off!


    Verdic closed the carriage door roughly.


    Mercy was not an option.


    Raymond, Carynne, Dun.


    Verdic did not tell his daughter, but doubts about Dun had also started to fester within him.


    Its alreadye to this, but why isnt Carynnes neck hanging just yet?!


    Why hadnt that man killed Carynne yet? Why, when Raymond had arrived at this ce already?


    Verdic picked up his axe. At that moment, the iron doors were sessfully broken.


    Get out of the way! Ill take care of this myself!


    Its dangerous!


    Do you even hear yourself?! The only people inside are a skinny, worthless priest and a goddamn wench! Just block the entrance properly!


    Verdic ran up the spiral staircase. It was dark inside, but he was not afraid. Anger dominated him entirely. He ran, and ran, and ran up the stairs. With his axe firmly gripped in one hand.


    <i>I will ughter that wench with my own hands.</i>


    * * *


    The wind was blowing hard. It felt as if the tower was being swept away.


    She could not understand any of what Duns saying. Carynne asked once again.


    What did you just say?


    Dun looked towards the base of the tower. And, he answered.


    J-Jump down. I-If you dont jump right now Verdic will ce in.


    Dun, of course, was not saying that there was some sort of safety device that would catch her should she jump. Carynne looked down.


    Hes telling her to die.


    But Sir Raymond hes here.


    However, Dun urged her hastily yet again.


    C-Carynne.


    In j-just a little while, y-you will also understand. This is my constion, t-to you.


    Hurry.


    Carynne just stared at him. And she grabbed the window frames. She could not understand why Dun was telling her to jump now. She could not understand why they all wanted her to die. If she could just get even the smallest hint, she vowed that shed do anything. At least, thats what she thought.


    But here and today


    Youre u-used to this already, right?


    Duns counterargument was correct. Death was a humdrum routine for Carynne. The death thaty ahead of her was not particrly special either. The middle of the road to get here was a bit different, but the conclusion was not. Verdic had acted like this before, too.


    <i>SLAM!</i>


    Why are you demanding me to do something like this?


    What does this have anything to do with you?


    Carynne wanted to ask. But Dun would not answer. On and on, this cycle went. Hes always been so maniptive.


    But now, there was no time to ask.


    What gives you the right to do this?


    As if to hurry her, Dun pushed her shoulder.


    Because of the wagers oue.

 Chapter 143

    Chapter 143


    What?


    This, w-will help you.


    Carynne looked down at the dizzying height below her. Its not as if she heard him wrong. <i>Time to die.</i><i>Jump right over and die.</i> Thats what Duns saying right now.


    As Carynne hesitated, Dun urged her once more.


    A-A-Are you a-afraid of dying?


    No, its not that.


    She shook her head.


    I mean, it really isnt that Today isnt the day Im supposed to die. Dun, its not today.


    Everything just kept happening so quickly in this iteration. Was it due to the deviation in Carynnes actions? Or was it, as he said, because Dun was estimating the time? But Carynne could not imagine herself falling all the way down there.


    Im not going to die. Ive fallen from a simr height before, and I didnt die.


    Carynne recalled the terrible pain. She recalled the pain of every single bone in her body being crushed. She had fallen from a simr height. She knew that the oue would be the same.


    Just as she didnt die back then, so too would she not die right now. Its not her designated time to die. Even if her limbs were to be twisted, even if all the bones in her body were shatteredit was impossible for her to die before <i>that</i> day.


    Its not today.


    I-It will be different this time.


    <i>THUD!</i>


    Hes close. Carynne turned her head. Hesing.


    Why cant I open this door right now?!


    <i>SLAM!</i>


    She heard Verdics shouts. He was pounding at the door with his fists. Carynne felt a strong sense of dj vu from hearing that mans voice.


    So many variables differed in this loop, yet the ending was, without fail, still Verdic. This time again. This time <i>again</i>.


    But


    CARYNNE!


    Then, she heard another voice. It was Raymond. Before she knew it, he was already near her. He gestured for Carynne to stay as her upper body was sticking out of the window. With a bright red face.


    Just a little while, stay, just


    Then, he turned around and pointed his gun somewhere. <i>Bang!</i> Another person died yet again. Outside the door, Verdic hacked away to break it. Under the tower, Raymond was running straight to her.


    Carynne watched Raymond.


    But Sir Raymond is here.


    Carynne murmured. Hes here, this time, in a simr situation. Hes alwayste. But hes here now.


    I promised a certain courtesy to that man.


    What kind of courtesy.


    The wind blew at Duns short hair. Carynne answered him.


    That Ill try until the very end. To live, I mean.


    Carynne pointed towards Raymond with one finger.


    Like him.


    Duns eyes followed the direction at which her finger pointed, where the knight was moving urgently.


    R-Right That man.


    Look, look. Hes there, isnt he? In this situation still You know, there was not a single time that he arrived on time.


    Carynne wrapped her arms around her. The wind roared. Dun was next to her. Outside the door was Verdic, breaking the door piece by piece with his axe. Despite it all, she felt a strange sense of serenity.


    If Im going to die anyway, it shouldnt matter if I wait a little longer, yes?


    Carynne watched. She watched Raymonds efforts. <i>Even if my head gets lopped off, I want to wait a little longer.</i> Carynne did not want to die right now. She did not want his efforts to be wasted. Once she died, everything would go back to the beginning yet again.


    Memories were not carried over. Time did not build up. This version of Raymond would cease to exist. Even if the people around her remained the same, they had no memories. The moments of doubts, ofpassion, of making a choicethey would all disappear. Again, <i>again.</i>


    Carynne hated that.


    But Dun didnt seem pleased. Behind her, he spoke.


    You have to help me. You won the wager.


    One brief moment passed wherein Carynne did not know what happened.


    The world turned upside down.


    The sound of the wind howled against her ears.


    Her head spun and spun and spun.


    And, pain.


    Dun had pushed Carynne from behind her.


    It was quite literally only a coincidence that Carynne did not plummet to the far ground right away. The hem of her sleeve had caught on the window frame. Her legs were dangling in the air.


    You You, right now


    Carynneboriously reached up and managed to grab the window frame. However, she did not manage to get a solid grip on it, and as the wind blew, her slender body followed.


    She gasped.


    Right now. Just what are you doing.


    Dun climbed up the window frame. He was much too high up. Dun leaned out of the window and reached down. Then, he grabbed Carynne by the wrist.


    She clung to Duns arm.


    A-Are you afraid of dying?


    What the hell are you doing!


    Youve been like this since you were a child.


    Carynne felt herself getting furious. She loathed Dun. Without even answering anything properly, hes trying to kill her now.


    So, her ending in this life would be neither Raymond or Verdic, but Dun?


    While looking down at her, Dun slowly stepped on her fingers.


    Y-You wont be afraid from now on.


    What?


    <i>SLAM!</i>


    Of course Right now Im not saying youre going to live. E-Even if you do right now, in the end, again


    <i>CRACK!</i>


    Mister Verdic is going to kill you.


    Carynne could not breathe. She didnt know what he was talking about. Her free will was limited to choosing only between dying by Verdics hands, or dying by Duns hands. Why was he even asking her to choose? Why was he saying that as if it was such a magnanimous thing?


    You won the wager.


    What?


    Because t-that man Sir Raymond is here.


    Dun was looking at Raymond, not the air beneath Carynnes feet. Raymond was running towards her. He was stepping on the soldiers heads, leaping forward. An arrow was shot from the entrance, but it did not hit its target. Raymond drew nearer and nearer to the tower. He started to scale the wall. Made eye contact with Dun.


    While keeping his eyes on Raymond, Dun said,


    Truthfully, I no matter who it was maybe it didnt matter. I understand now.


    Dont act like you know, you goddamn bastard! Carynne cried out.


    But soon after, she saw something strange.


    L-Lets stop now. Just fall.


    Dun smiled.


    It was a smile that went from ear to ear, as if his mouth was about to be ripped apart.


    You, you <i>know.</i>


    Carynne thought.


    Maybe.


    Maybe.


    Because itse to this.


    All of a sudden, Carynne thought.


    She had never been so angry at Dun. She felt annoyed and frustrated because he refused to talk to her properly even after he hade all the way to this cebut here, now, Dun was eliciting a kind of resentment in her that was a bit different from before.


    It was different from how it was with Raymond, due perhaps to his personality or attitude. This time, Dun was giving off something like the camaraderie of sharing a secret.


    Because, unlike Raymond who did not believe Carynne, Dun <i>does.</i>


    But was there any guarantee that this was not just another mere delusion?


    Just, nothing. Maybe Dun No, just nothing.


    It will be different this time.


    Did this mean that she would really die this time?


    Perhaps even living again was all in her head?


    If she were to die this time, would she <i>stay</i> dead?


    Thats fine. Thats a good thing.


    Was it still a good thing, even now?


    If she were to just die like this Was she certain that shed be alright with it? Wasnt it frightening? Was it going to be okay even if darkness coulde to her, if death would find her?


    For her to just go back to nothingness, for all the incidents thus far to disperse, for none of her questions to be answered at all, for her to just return to the earth and to the ashes


    Could she ept that?


    Truly?


    Youll be fine now.


    Dun stepped on Carynnes fingers.


    * * *


    CARYNNE!


    Raymond gritted his teeth. He had to move. <i>He must.</i>


    The moment he saw Carynne dangling from the window, he estimated the height of the tower. He bent his legs, immediately leapt forward, and started scaling the wall.


    The towers outer walls werepletely vertical, but that did not matter to Raymond. He used the gaps in the bricks of the old tower to jump up. This wall was like a t surface to him. An arrow grazed his ear.


    <i>I can catch you, I can catch you!</i> Raymond jumped on the wall. The wall was vertical, but <i>it did not matter.</i> He reached out to Carynne.


    Their eyes met.


    But the only thing he caught was air.


    Carynne went down. <i>Down.</i> Much too easily.


    Then.


    A terrible sound.


    The most terrible thing happened.


    <b> End of Volume 3 </b>

 Chapter 144 - 00. Resetting Lady

    Chapter 144 - 00. Resetting Lady


    The beginning was always the same.


    The gray sky, the drizzling rain, the muddy, barren garden. The chill in the air, the mud-stained nightgown. The gashes on her throat that stung. If she didnt go back to the mansion soon, the gardener would find her. She kicked the rope near her feet and headed to the passage used by maidsshe failed again this time. Its cold. This time, once again. She gritted her teeth. What went wrong this time.


    Unlike the damp hallway, the room inside was warm. The temperature was better due to the thick fur quilts that blocked out the cold and the fire that burned in the firece.


    She took off her dirty clothes and threw them into the firece, at which, the fire died because her clothes were wet.


    Cursing to herself as she turned on themp at the foot of her bed, she poured oil into the firece so that the fire would burn once more. She stared at the woman in the mirror. She failed again this time.


    <i>Again!</i>


    Yet again, she was revived like this.


    All efforts were meaningless. Time itself was futile. Rtionships held no weight. There was no such thing as love, no such thing as resentment, no such thing as sympathy. Regardless of how hard Raymond had tried, regardless of how much Verdic despised her, everything just kept going back to the beginning.


    Hah!


    Carynne turned around. The piece of paper on her desk was all crumpled up.


    There was no more need to write on that piece of paper. She absolutely hated this. Maybe, she had thought, maybe shed live more in that life. Maybe she was desperately frightenedat the thought of actually dying.


    As Carynne opened her eyes once more, she let out a long exhale. She felt a sense of relief, but it was only for a moment. A terrible sense of boredom started setting in. Shes disgusted with herself for even letting out a sigh of relief.


    Again. This time again, she was alive. This time again, she was revived.


    Its the same. Dun lied.


    Carynne hunched forward and slumped on the desk. Its hard. This time, again.


    No.


    Something <i>had</i> changed.


    Carynne sat up and straightened her back. As she sat in that chair, she stared nkly into the empty air.


    Its weird. No. Something <i>definitely</i> changed. Even in the midst of excruciating pain, theres one thing thats certain. This time.


    No Its different


    Carynne was aware.


    The very moment she died that very moment!


    It was different. Carynne had <i>never</i> died before the appointed day. This time, however, she could clearly discern her previous death.


    Carynne had died before the appointed day.


    I died early.


    Thats what changed.


    Carynne got up from her seat. She had to get out. She needed to check something. Clutching one single item in her hands as she ran. Though iplete, her memories wereing back little by little.


    She recalled what her mother had given her. Her mother, a red-haired woman who looked just like her, soothing her as she gave the item.


    Perhaps this can be of help to you.


    But it could also <i>not</i> help me.


    Carynne never remembered until now. She stared at the gun as though shes been entranced. She never thought of using a gun when she had killed Nancy. That notion had beenpletely buried in the depths of oblivion.


    Why did she never think of looking for the gun thats hidden in one corner of her room? Could more of her memories starting back to her?


    Anyway, thats not the point right now.


    Still wearing a thin dress as she ran out in a hurry, Carynne delightedly skipped as she crossed the hallways. It was dark and she was barefooted. Carynne could feel the cold ground of the corridors beneath her feet.


    This time as well, the setting was the same. The mansion had not been burned to rubble. The hallways were clean. Through the many windows of the hallways, she could see the drizzling rain, ever-falling. The thin clothes she was wearing right now did nothing to protect her from the chill of the air around her, but it was of no consequence to her.


    Right now, something has changed.


    Ha, haha.


    And she <i>must</i> check it out right away.


    Carynne now stood in front of a door. Panting, she straightened herself up.


    She needed to confirm it.


    Carynne knocked on the wooden door.


    <i>Knock, knock.</i>


    No other sound answered her back. It was still before the break of dawn. The person inside should still be asleep. It would have been right to go back and wait until morningbut, no. Carynne could no longer wait. Clenching one hand into a fist, she hit the door.


    <i>Thud!</i>


    She pounded on the door vigorously. However, the door still remained shut.


    <i>Thud, thud, thud, thud, thud!</i>


    She banged her fist against the hard surface over and over and over again. And she would keep at it until this door would open. Need to check it now. Come on, <i>now!</i> Carynne banged on the door relentlessly. She did not want to wait. In the end, she shouted.


    Wake up!


    <i>Thud, thud, thud, thud, thud!</i>


    I said wake UP!


    Finally, bustling noises could be heard inside, and the door was soon opened by a crack. There, a woman with disheveled hair stood, rubbing her eyes as she checked who exactly was making such a ruckus. The moment she saw that it was Carynne, the woman sighed.


    Mdy, its still nighttime.


    She was evidently tired and irritated.


    Whats wrong?


    It was the face of the dark-skinned woman Carynne knew oh so very well. She could still clearly remember how that face had changed when its owner stopped breathing.


    Carynne beamed.


    <i>Its you. My maid. The first person I had strangled to death.</i>


    Nancy!


    Carynne hugged Nancy right away. Nancy was puzzled, but returned the girls hug nheless. She patted Carynne on the back and spoke, still with a tired voice.


    Did you have another nightmare, Mdy?


    Yeah.


    Shall we get inside?


    And Carynne replied with a smile.


    Oh, right. Are you going to erase my memories again?


    The hand that was patting Carynnes back halted. Nancy pushed Carynne out of her embrace.


    What?


    As Nancy asked back, it looked as if cold water had been poured over her head. Any and all drowsiness she should have still felt disappeared in an instant.


    Watching as the woman reacted in that manner, Carynne asked again.


    How much money do you earn from erasing my memories?


    Mdy. Right now, what What are you talking about? It seems like youre still half-asleep


    But Nancys tone betrayed that she, in fact, knew what Carynne was talking about. Carynne could tell. Nancy was clearly flustered, and just the tone of her voice was asking her, How did you know that?


    Carynne clutched the shoulders of the befuddled Nancy.


    How long did you think Id stay ignorant?


    Mdy, thats not true.


    Should she continue pressing Nancy now? There were a lot of questions that Carynne wanted to ask, too. However, Carynne recalled that there was something more important than that.


    Ah, gosh.


    No, no. Not yet.


    Carynne also needed to confirm <i>that</i>, but first, theres something else she needed to do.


    She handed over to Nancy the thing that she brought. Nancy bewilderedly held that item. It was a good, nice weight to hold onto. Carynne smiled brightly.


    Before that, I have to keep my promise.


    Carynneughed. She had to give this as a present to Nancy.


    She had promised, after all.


    Here.


    Huh?


    Carynne brought Nancys index finger to the trigger. The gun had already been loaded.


    Go on, press it.


    Then, she led the barrel to her forehead. Its cold metal felt good against her skin.


    Carynne closed her eyes.


    O-Oh my god, Mdy? What is this? Wait


    While listening to Nancys flustered voice, Carynne helped her pull the trigger.


    <i>Bang!</i>


    The beginning was always the same.


    The gray sky, the drizzling rain, the muddy, barren garden. The chill in the air, the mud-stained nightgown. The gashes on her throat that stung.


    I knew it. Back to the beginning right away.


    Carynne stared at the sky while touching her aching neck. Before the break of dawn, the sky was dark and gloomy. However, Carynne could see hope in it.


    Something that never changed <i>had</i> changed.


    Then, there should be more things that <i>could</i> change.


    Carynne walked through the corridors. And, she shook her head. Her memories were scattered. They still hadnt returned to her properly.


    In the previous life No, in the life before that, her memories were in that state even though she waspletely away from Nancy for about a year.


    What would change once she could regain her memories?


    She didnt know the answer to that either. Just as the stars and the sun couldnt be seen past this downcast sky.


    Her enemy was constant, but also, her time was infinite. She could eventually find the answer.


    <i>Screech.</i>


    Carynne opened the door. There was a fire going in the firece, and there were thick fur quilts hanging on the walls to stave off the cold, thus, the room was warm. She changed out of her wet clothes. Even as chills kept running down her spine, she could feel that she was being enveloped with hope.


    Same, but different.


    In exchange for all the murders she hadmitted, she managed to find out many truths.


    Carynne picked up her pen.


    <b>My name is Carynne Hare.</b>


    Her name had meaning. Its fine. This time, next time, or even the one after that. Whether it would take her ten years or thirty years, she <i>would</i> persevere until the end. She would do her utmost best to die.


    She had not fallen into a novel.


    She had been deceived for 100 years.


    But she would no longer be deceived from now on.


    My name.


    Her name was Carynne Hare.


    It was through this name that she remained whole.


    Carynne swept her fingertips over her handwriting.


    Beneath her touch, the ink was smeared, and the words soon became blurred.

 Chapter 145

    Chapter 145


    Carynne retrieved the gun once more and put a coat on herself. Then, she stood up straight. Its still before the break of dawn. And she still needed to be on the move. The sooner she took action, the better. The corridors were empty at this time of the day.


    So First, the study.


    Carynne recalled the notebook she had caught sight of in the study that time the fire broke out in the mansion. It was stuck between books that had the same spines (likely volumes of an encyclopedia), and so the notebook looked clearly out of ce.


    She stared at the door of the study.


    Fucks sake.


    It was still locked. Carynne remembered that the key was located at Duns room, but at this point in the timeline, Dun hadnt even arrived yet.


    Then, her father should have the key. Or at the very least, Helen, the housekeeper, should have a spare.


    The time now was before the break of dawn. She would have to wait. No one else was awake yet.


    Carynne sighed and turned around. As expected, she had been too hasty. Wasnt it just recently that Carynne killed Nancy? No, the previous time, Nancy killed Carynne.


    One death was enough for tonight. It wouldnt hurt to try again tomorrow.


    Ehh


    Yeah, no. She didnt want to wait. If anything were to go wrong, Carynne knew that she could just die right away. There was no need for her to hesitate. Its entirely probable that ones patience would grow ever so thin as one grew older.


    <i>Click.</i>


    Carynne took out the gun. She pointed it at the doorknob and, in her mind, counted down. Gotta get this over with in one shot.


    <i>Bang!</i>


    She felt the brunt of the recoil on her shoulders. Staggering, she tried to keep herself steady. Then, she rubbed her tingling hands.


    Wow.


    Carynne got startled by the too-loud echoes that were now wracking the hallways. The noise was much too big. Someone must have heard that.


    Even so, no one seemed to being even after she looked around. Indeed, even though she had repeated this same part of her life over and over, not one single person was awake at this time. It seemed as if this witching hour of this particr day was just a time that people were especially deep asleep.


    Actually, it didnt matter to her now. Carynne examined the doorknob. If its still not broken after everything, shed definitely get mad.


    Phew.


    Fortunately, thetch was broken. Carynne let out a sigh. Shes always been a good shot throughout the years, shooting those people well enough. Carynne picked up the fallen piece of the knob. Its notpletely broken, but its broken enough that she could open the door.


    Breaking a doorknob seemed to be much more difficult than shooting a person to death. Should she sincerely practice shooting next time? While next to Sir Raymond. Shes sure that hed teach her well.


    Alright. She decidedshe would learn how to shoot properly.


    What would he say once shed tell him that she wanted to learn how to shoot? <i>Are you going to kill someone?</i>


    Where was it again


    Carynne walked inside. She took amp and held it up. It was dark in the study. She straightened her back.


    And, inside that dark study, she saw Catherines portrait.


    Hi, Mom.


    Carynne looked up once, then went further inside. Eventually, she would die just like Catherine. Since there was a change, there <i>must</i> be an end.


    It was definitely high up, enough that shed need to use adder. So, while thinking of a different version of this study that was being engulfed by mes, Carynne firmly gripped thedder and climbed. She had to climb slowly because she was still holding themp with one hand.


    She suddenly got nervous for no reason. Where was it? What if one of the changes this time was that it did not exist here?


    Ah, its here.


    So Carynnes regression did not mean that certain things would be lost. She reached towards the notebook and picked it up.


    It was clearly distinct from the books of a simr design that were around it. It had a ck leather cover, yet had no indications of a title or anything outwardly.


    Carynne remained standing on thedder as she opened the notebook. It was a bit ufortable to flip through it because she could use only one hand.


    Someones handwriting filled the notebook. Fortunately, it wasnt just an empty journal.


    Carynne slowly went through the pages.


    <b>[ Im pregnant. Now, the end. ]</b>


    Pregnant. The end.


    It seemed like Carynnes theory was correct.


    She closed her eyes once, then opened them again. No. Dont think about it yet.


    Her mother got pregnant and passed on the curse of regression to her, it seemed. But perhaps theres another reason. Really, maybe theres some ce she could go to break the curse, or some item she needed to retrieve to act as a spark.


    Carynne skipped to thest few pages.


    <b>[ Ive lost my appetite. Im craving for fruits. ]</b>


    Its just a mundane ount of a womans pregnancy. Seeing as theres nothing of note, Carynne let out a groan. She flipped through the pages again.


    <i>Flutter.</i>


    <b>[ Crown Prince Gueuze is here again. That damn son of a bitch. Just die. ]</b>


    <i>Flutter.</i>


    Nothing.


    Carynne flipped through the pages over and over. Then, she arrived at thest page of the notebook.


    Still nothing.


    Ugh, seriously!


    Carynne threw the diary to the floor. It had nothing. Catherine was quite obviously such azy woman. She pertained to what truly mattered only in those few pages in the beginning, then <i>nothing</i>. Why did she even keep a diary.


    <i>Mom!</i>


    Carynne grumbled and indignantly descended thedder. The diary she had been looking forward to with such excitement ended up having <i>nothing.</i>


    Youre too much, ugh!


    ring at the haphazardly thrown diary, she stomped her feet on the ground. What a disappointment. When the thing caught her eye when the fire had broken out, she thought it would be something significant, but it turned out to be useless.


    Shi


    Picking up the diary from the floor, she began to stab at it anywhere and everywhere. She suppressed the urge to rip it apart. And, with an especially sour pout on her lips, she gave the stink eye Catherines portrait, hanging high up in one wall of the study.


    Youre just too much.


    Shouldnt her mother have at least tried to help her or at least tried to live longer for this purpose? Catherine treaded a life that was no different than Carynnes, and so it was only natural to expect that shed keep records that were as detailed as possible.


    But theres nothing of the sort. As Carynnes motheras Carynnes senior of sorts in lifetheres just no sincerity from Catherine at all.


    Carynne exploded in anger. If it was her, she wouldnt have done that. If it was her, shed have done her best to make an effort.


    If it were me


    But it didnt take long for Carynne to remember that she gave up on keeping a diary and writing on it regrly. If she were to die as soon as shed give birth to a daughter, her daughter would likewise curse at her for being indolent, too.


    No, but Im in a different situation


    As she was right now, its a meaningless task to keep a record since she died each and every year anyway. No traces would be left, and the only thing that came with her was her coin.


    Carynne defended herself just like that. She was a little embarrassed, but she still couldnt stand that her fury was being tempered.


    Even so, getting angry at a portrait still took a lot of energy from her.


    She slumped to the floor. It must be teeming with dust, but it didnt bother her. Shey down on the groundpletely. It was so dark that she couldntpletely see the portrait.


    While lying down, she thought. What would be the best move? What should she do now?


    Still as ever, the house remained serene despite the gunshot that rang out earlier. Perhaps because today was just meant to be that kind of day.


    After all, it was the first day where nothing much would change.


    The diary was a dead end. Theres nothing substantial written in it.


    So, what should she do now?


    Of course.


    Carynne got up. At the recollection that something had changed, she got so excited that she seemed positively buzzing.


    Dun.


    Now, the real sce will start.


    During her final moments in that iteration, Carynne thought, <i>Maybe I can die for good this time.</i> But that wasnt the case. The only thing that changed was the date of her death. Something changed, yes, but it could hardly be calledfort, constion or sce.


    What is it supposed to mean anyway?


    Carynne fiddled with her gun. She had witnessed this very mansion burned down to embers, yet it now stood intact once more. Thats why, as soon as she had fulfilled her promise to Nancy, she had set off to find the diaryto no avail.


    She didnt care about sce or whatever. This was the first day, and Dun hadnt even entered the mansion yet.


    She had to think about what else she could do. Since the diary proved to be useless, then


    Me too though, seriously


    Though there were no records, there was one person she had in mind. She reloaded the gun. She would have to get information from someone else.


    Actually, she should have just done this from the very beginning


    Carynne was so electrified that she became self-aware of just how chaotic her actions were. But thats alright. She did not have to be conscious about any mistakes she might makeafter all, she would not need to stay for a long time.


    If she were to make a mistake, all she had to do was shoot a bullet through her head and kill herself.

 Chapter 146

    Chapter 146


    Surely the first time of course.


    Carynne went to Nancys room once again, which she had visited only a moment ago. Having kept her promise, its now time for her to do what she needed to do.


    Oh, right. If I kill her this time, should I let her kill me again next time?


    Turning the gun in her hand, Carynne mulled it over. In the end though, she shook her head. She had already died a lot before this, shes sure Nancy would let it slide.


    <i>Knock, knock.</i>


    It was different from when she had stricken the door loudly before. Now a little calmer, Carynne knocked on the door normally for a long time instead of pounding on it roughly. <i>Knock, knock, knock, knock,</i> until it would open. Quite some timeter, the door slowly opened, and a murmur from inside leaked out.


    Mdy, its still dawn


    Nancy opened the door, evidently irritated and tired. Then, she rubbed her eyes as she peered at Carynne. It was the same reaction as before. So, too, did she say the same thing.


    Did you have a nightmare?


    <i>Yes, I had a nightmare. Actually, Im still in the middle of one. But now, I am going to experience a new morning. And youll have to help me.</i>


    Yes, can we go back to my room?


    U-Um, Mdy whats that?


    Nancy asked with a shaky voice. Carynne found the maids question to be a little funny.


    You know what. If you try screaming here, Ill shoot you in the face right away.


    With a sweet smile upon her lips, Carynne shoved the pistols barrel at Nancys forehead. Nancy shut her mouth right then. Carynne brought a finger to her lips and slowly led the maid out of her room.


    We have a lot to talk about, dont we?


    .


    .


    .


    The story that Nancy recounted, trembling voice and all, was just as Carynne had guessed beforehand.


    Catherine introduced Nancy to Carynne, who had been constantly depressed as a child. Then, Nancy made her think that she was inside an illusory fairytale world.


    Why?


    She wanted you to experience something new, not just get pregnant and have a child. I guess the Madam wanted you to live a more pure and more beautiful life.


    Her mother seemed to have spoken more frankly and in more detail to someone who wasnt her father. Carynne chewed her lower lip and said,


    I dont understand.


    Carynne mumbled as she fiddled with the gun. She couldnt understand it herself. Why did her mother urge her to take this path that repeats over and over again? Why did she make it like that? In Carynnes eyes, what Catherine had done to her was of no regard to her at all.


    But at that time, Mdy, you had already heard the story, and you were extremely anxious and depressed.


    So the only things Ill do in my life is get pregnant, give birth and then die? Thats it?


    The childs cries urged Catherine to take action. And, thus, Carynnes life turned upside down.


    Thats all it took.


    Catherine was not supposed to do that. Carynne was filled with the urge to cry. Her mother shouldnt have twisted the truth, even if she said that she didnt want to hear it. Catherine should have just allowed Carynne to hear the truth.


    But now, Carynne could vaguely guess why Catherine had done that.


    Catherine must have gotten so worn down by Crown Prince Gueuze, too. Carynne was pissed off about the abandoned diary that was extremely insincere, but even with the few words that Catherine had left behind, the anger she had against Crown Prince Gueuze was evident.


    <b>[ Gueuze is here again. Damn son of a bitch. Just die. ]</b>


    Carynnes great-grandmother was a grand duchess, her grandmother was a countess, and her mother was the wife of a bar. Their peerages had dropped exponentially throughout the generations. This was what happened as these women had chosen men for themselves on their own terms.


    Her great-grandmother married a grand duke, but Catherine settled for a bar.


    It didnt ur to Carynne that the crown prince must have proposed to her mother properly before. She knew well enough that Crown Prince Gueuze was not a romantic, as the public would say. Even when he was trying to win Catherine over, he must surely have done it through violent means.


    Maybe her mother didnt love her father either. No one would have loved a man she had just been set up to marry. Its just that, perhaps her father was the best her mother could have.


    It was a no-brainer that Crown Prince Gueuze must havee to Catherine even after each of their marriages. And Catherine must not have been d about that. She thought of him as a nuisance. Courtship from a member of the royal family was violence, not love.


    Catherines one and only choice was to flee. Perhaps seeing her daughter, Carynne, crying like that was what pushed her off the edge.


    Perhaps she really, truly just wanted to choose love.


    Everything until now was just Carynnes guess. However, Carynne thought that Catherine must have projected herself unto her daughter and inscribed her wishes into her.


    The perfect love story that she could not have for herself.


    But from the start, it was a misguided effort. Carynne was barren. Catherines n was as terribly structured as a sand castle built in front of aing wave.


    Carynne, for now and forever, would just No, Carynne shook her head. This time, something had changed. It could be different from now on.


    I believe it no longer matters what my mother once had in mind for me.


    Nancy seemed a little surprised to hear Carynnes answer.


    I see. The Madam will be disappointed if she could hear this.


    <i>Who cares.</i>


    Carynne ignored the maids slight reprimand and went straight to the point.


    Can you bring back my memories?


    Maybe? Nancy answered.


    How?


    Please unfasten this first.


    <i>Rattle.</i>


    Im being sincere


    Nancy spoke tearfully as Carynne took a moment to think. Some of her memories wereing back to her from time to time. Nancy was pleading with tears in her eyes like this, but as a matter of fact, Carynne was a frail young woman and Nancy could very well overpower her. After all, Nancy had killed Carynne before, too.


    Dont do anything strange to my body anymore.


    Carynne was sick and tired of it all. Shes sick of this darkness, sick of trying fumble her way through the abyss just to find the truth.


    I haventpletely regained my memories, but some fragments keeping back to me from time to time.


    Instead of waiting more, wouldnt theye back faster with my help?


    If anything at all could help, should she just get whatever she could from Nancy? She could die as soon as possible now anyway.


    I still wont release you though.


    But that really wont work, Mdy.


    Why should I believe you?


    Nancy pondered for a moment, then soon gave out a suggestion.


    You can give me more money.


    The nerve of you.


    As if Carynnes words were the signal, it seemed like Nancy was henceforth determined to act shamelessly. She conveyed her true feelings and spoke clearly.


    My only motivation is money. If you give me more money than His Lordship, I will cooperate with youpletely.


    That sounded usible.


    Carynne knew that Nancy had itchy fingers somewhat. In her own way, Nancy was efficient with both her work and her bad habit, but because thetter outweighed the former, she couldnt stay long wherever she worked and tended to get kicked out before long. Furthermore, her bad habit couldnt totally be covered up by her hypnosis, thats why Nancy would just cram anything she wanted into her pocket.


    Now that Carynne thought about it, was it perhaps because House Hare needed Nancys hypnosis that theyd been turning a blind eye to her actions all this time?


    You stole Ises ne, too, huh.


    <i>Why didnt I ever suspect Nancy,</i> Carynne thought. That day, when Ise had a tantrum, the girl had pped Nancy, too.


    Whos Ise?


    She hadnt appeared yet? Carynne ignored Nancys recent question and answered another one.


    Fine, Ill give you ten silver coins first.


    Nancys eyes went wide. Ten silver coins was her sry for three whole months.


    How will you pay that, Mdy?


    I stole Dads key.


    I couldnt do that either, so how


    If you seed in this, youll get ten gold coins in the end.


    Hearing this, Nancys gaze burned with a strong, fiery determination.


    The contract was thus established.

 Chapter 147

    Chapter 147


    Nancys eyes cooled down soon enough and was reced with a panicked look as she murmured,


    N-Now Please trust me, Mdy


    Carynne listened to the hypnotists words repeatedly, inhaled some incense repeatedly, but everything was to no avail. No other memories came back to her.


    Still nothing?


    Carynne fiddled with the gun in her hand.


    Ill try it again, Nancy said.


    However, nothing changed.


    <i>Knock, knock.</i>


    Who is it?


    What are you both doing all day in there?


    The strict voice that came from beyond the door was owned by Helen, the housekeeper. Carynne answered back in a hurry.


    Theres just something I have to discuss with Nancy!


    Mdy, Lord Dun ising in a few days, and so there are many things that must be prepared. Pleasee out, as I said.


    Nancy told Carynne in a quiet voice as well.


    I have a lot of work to do, too.


    At the same time, Nancy made a gesture saying that she should go over to the door.


    In utter disbelief, Carynne muttered, And where do you think youre going?


    Uh, I also wish to bring back your memories, Mdy. But if we cant Maybe theres no answer


    Fed up, Carynne cocked her pistol. She didnt know why this woman was being so unhelpful. She should just kill her and start again.


    M-Mdy, wait.


    Nancy spoke urgently. As expected, people would cough up what they knew when given enough <i>reason</i> to do so. Though Carynne remained expressionless on the outside, she was willed with mirth on the inside.


    What?


    I believe you!


    So what if you do.


    No, no. Um, lets say Im inclined to believe you.


    Carynne watched as Nancy frantically tried to squeeze out an answer. It was so obvious on her face that she was wracking her brain.


    Mdy, if you really are 117? Or 118? At that age, its going to be difficult to bring back your memories.


    Why?


    I can only assume that you cant remember because that much time has passed. No one can unravel more than a hundred years of repeated brainwashing.


    Thene up with a way.


    Carynne spoke through clenched teeth, but Nancy shook her head.


    Theres no way but to wait and try other methods slowly and gradually, like with the treatment of real old people.


    If Carynne were to kill Nancy here, would she be taken to court again?


    She held back her rising annoyance. It hadnt been long since she had reset.


    In the end, youre of no help at all.


    But if you give me money, Ill do whatever I can to help.


    Carynne let out a very long sigh but soon untied Nancy from her bounds. Kill her or whatever next time. Theres nothing she could do now, was there?


    Besides killing, Carynne decided to think of something else for now.


    Nancy rubbed her previously tied wrists then reached for Carynnes hair.


    What the?


    I have tob your hair, Mdy.


    Carynne sat still. Seeing the gun still in Carynnes hands, Nancy sighed.


    Will you be holding onto that the entire time?


    Do I look like I trust you right now?


    Mdy, what good would it do me to threaten your life?


    <i>But you killed me before.</i>


    Even so, theres no need to say that. Carynne kept her mouth shut. It didnt look like Nancy had any intention to kill Carynne now, even though a guns been pointed at her thus far.


    I do feel quite an attachment to you, too, Mdy. After all, I fed, dressed and raised you throughout the years.


    Then why did you spin such a tale like a dark-skinned person being a countrys queen?


    Well wouldnt there <i>someday</i> be a country like that in the future? You could say that its a fairytale, kind of.


    <i>Stop daydreaming now like I said or Ill seriously be your enemy right here and now.</i>


    Carynne no longer said anything back to Nancy.


    She was a thoroughly brainwashed person. All those days that Nancy spun her tales eventually became the basis of Carynnes worldview. She knew that it was this eras norm to look at Nancy unfavorably because she was dark-skinnedjust like how Ise thought of herbut Carynne could not imbibe the same notions.


    In my own way, I also like you, Mdy.


    Sure.


    Nancy skillfully styled Carynnes hair, tightened her corset and dressed her for the day. When Carynne stood up, Nancy got ready to go out of the room again.


    Come to think of it, Mdy, do you have a coin?


    What kind of coin.


    A gold one.


    What?


    For a moment, Carynnes heart raced. It became that way even though theres no real reason for it to have reacted like this.


    Because Nancy had asked her about something that Carynne herself hadnt talked about with someone else. Ever.


    Was Nancy talking about the gold coin that Carynne always held before she died?


    W-What kind of gold coin?


    If you dont have it, never mind.


    Just tell me.


    No, its really nothing of consequence?


    Ill be the judge of that. Tell me. Now.


    Feeling threatened, Nancy immediately answered.


    Lord Dun ordered me before. If youre holding a gold coin with a number on it, Mdy, he told me to report it to him right away.


    Dun talked about the coin, huh.


    Carynne murmured. Nancy was getting restless because it was time for her to work, but Carynne held her back and spoke.


    First of all, as soon as Dunes, tell him that you saw a number.


    Y-Yes.


    Nancy nodded many times in a row. Carynne thought of what number it should be. How old was she? How many times had she reset? No. Carynne didnt have to count just to know.


    The number is 117.


    It would be more advantageous for her to use the same number as before.


    Got it? Say that.


    Yes, I understand. Ill tell himter.


    After Nancy left, Carynne sat alone in her room and stared at the floor. She thought of the coin, which had been her only sce during her repeated life.


    My coin


    It was the coin that had apanied her throughout her one hundred years of life. She thought about the coin that had always been with her.


    Where did it go?


    Carynne pulled off her beds nkets. She looked through her desk. She crouched down and scoured the floor. Not there. She retraced her memories. No clue. Where was it?


    Its not here


    Even after she had looked for it for a long time, she couldnt find it anywhere. Even after checking every nook and cranny of her room, it didnt turn up.


    Now that she thought about it, she didnt think it was in the garden either. She must have left it in a previous life.


    Carynne slumped down on her bed. Its not with her here. No. Since when? Did she lose it when she fell from the tower back then?


    No.


    Carynne recalled what happened in the iteration before this, when she went straight to Nancy and let her pull the trigger to keep the promise between them. Both of Carynnes hands had been upiedone at the barrel, the other at the trigger.


    She had been so tremendously excited at the discovery that one condition in her resetting had been overturned, and she couldnt care less about the coin at that time. It was her own mistake.


    I lost it


    The very coin that she had been carrying for one hundred years was now lot. At this, Carynne felt depressed. However, after a while, she got up. Just because she couldnt find it didnt mean she should just remain in the same ce.


    Its fine.


    <i>Im fine.</i>


    That coin was nothing much. It was a fact that she had died without holding that coin in her hand before but something else. The coin itself was nothing special.


    It was unfortunate that the coin in itself held not much significance. Its only use was for Nancy to tell Dun about the number, as she apparently had been doing until now.


    The coin was not important.


    The fact that Dun knew about it was whats crucial.


    Shes been telling Dun the numbers?


    Carynne thought that shed continue having that coin in her hand now and in the future. But she couldnt remember it clearly At what point did she start holding it? She had no clue. But if Dun was aware of the coins existence, it could only mean that he was involved one way or another.


    Whats up with that guy?


    How much did Dun know?


    How far had he schemed?


    Why did he know about the coin that she had never told a single soul?


    What the hell was going on in his mind?


    So many questions were swirling inside her head.


    How many do I have?


    Carynne counted the number of bullets in her gun.


    And, she thought about Dun.


    First, she should catch Dun and torture him by cutting off his fingers one at a time. That guy would surely confess then. How should she corner him, she wondered. Would she have to make him ingest a few drugs to incapacitate him? Besides that, Dun weighed more than he looked. When Carynne had personally dragged Thomass body into the basement back then, she had quite a difficult time. Where and how best could she abduct Dun.


    He hadnt arrived at the manor yet. Dun wouldnt remember her again this time. Then, she could lure him back into her room again.


    Thinking about all the various ways she could get rid of Dun, Carynne slowly raised her hand. The true sce he told her about had, in fact, <i>not</i>e to her as he promised. He would have to pay the price.


    Youre dead.


    With a snarl, murderous intent leaked out of her.


    Aftering back to life, Carynne found one motivation to keep her going.


    Thats right, I should work hard and ride this momentum. If I give myself the chance to think deeply, Ill only fall into despair. So, lets hold onto hope and move forward.


    As Carynne encouraged herself, she tugged up the corners of her lips.


    <i>Lets smile.</i>


    Even so, Carynne felt a hollow pain in her chest as she mourned the loss of her coin. She felt a slight sense of grief over its disappearance. It was an emotion that was as small as the coin itself, but it was difficult to ignore.

 Chapter 148

    Chapter 148


    Once again, the same birthday celebration. The birthday of the daughter of a fief lord, whose estate was far from the capital, wasnt a grand event. The same people, the same food, the same music.


    However, theres one thing thats differentCarynne herself. She was waiting for Dun impatiently, keeping her eyes wide open for his entrance. Beneath her dresss skirt, one leg was strapped with a dagger and the other with a gun.


    She had seeded with Nancy before, so Dun wouldnt be a problem. In her own way, Nancy wasnt cooperating with Carynne. But with Dun, on the other hand, Carynne believed that he would cooperate with her.


    If it wouldnt work, then she had a gun to help her.


    Are you really going to do it, Mdy?


    Just focus on putting it on properly.


    As she was told, Nancy strapped the weapons to Carynnes legs with a half-scared, half-bbergasted expression.


    Are you sure these arent going to fall?


    Yeess


    Carynne reached down and tried to shake off the weapons, and they didnt budge. Carynne and Nancy had taken quite an arduous time to secure the gun.


    I cant breathe


    It cant be helped. We have to fasten the corset properly so that it wont fall off.


    Uugh


    Even now, the corset was tight around her. Nancy had acted a little different from the usual, perhaps because she was nervous. The gun on her leg also felt cumbersome, and she didnt like the hairstyle Nancy did for her. The corset was also over-tightened.


    She made a mental note to add this to the list of things she had to pay Dun back for.


    Ill cut off your neck the moment I catch you.


    And then, a familiar voice reached her ears.


    C-Carynne Hare. Y-Your h-husband hase to you, yet y-you make that face?


    <i>Youre here!</i>


    Carynne inwardly cheered. Its been a hundred years since she had been so happy. <i>Yes, yes, you did well to meet me!</i> Pressing down the urge to shout these words, Carynne answered.


    Not yet.


    F-Fianc.


    Either way, not yet.


    Whos Dun? Hes Carynnes fianc.


    It was his betrotheds birthday, yet he was dressed in his ck priest robes as if he was attending a funeral instead. Everyone around him whispered behind his back, staring tantly without a hint of hesitation.


    There wasnt any such secret behind his appearance. Hes just in ugly.


    W-What are you doing?


    She pulled at his clothes, which smelled of the rain yet again this time, and the ends were as muddy as always. He also smelled faintly of wine. Did he drink?


    Carynne stared at Dun, who also stared down at her. Their eyes met.


    I-I dont know what youre t-thinking, but


    The current Dun couldnt possibly know what Carynne was thinking.


    Hes the assistant who Catherine had attached to Carynne. Catherine wished for Carynne to find true love. Nancy said that this man had been giving Carynne sedatives. Most of the food she had been eating all this time were made from his recipes.


    I want to drag you away and kill you now. I want to torture you and make you spit out the truth. I want to let everything unrestrained, to scream it all out.


    This was what Carynnes thinking: hes suspicious.


    Let go


    Carynne was aware that she was holding Dun by the cor right now.


    Excuse us.


    Carynne was aware that people around them were watching them. However, they couldnt help but feel conflicted.


    The song had begun. Carynne gnashed her mrs together and grabbed Duns hand.


    It will be true sce this time.


    It was the samefort he mentioned before. But right now, he doesnt remember that. Carynne led him to the proper position.


    In what manner am I going to die this time.


    What do you mean by sce.


    Raymonds first appearance wasnt until another month. Dun was here again with the same face. Carynne wanted to rip off that same face.


    The song was over.


    I w-wont ask you to l-love me, Carynne Hare. But were not strangers at all.


    Its your sole handiwork why weve had to look at each others faces for such a long time.


    Carynne kept staring at him. Every single word he uttered bothered her. Now that she thought about it, Dun seemed to be doing this to try and gauge whether she could remember.


    In her mind, Carynne was ripping off this mans face to examine him. This man, who had such a self-conscious expression due to his all-consuming inferiorityplex.


    It was as if bugs were crawling all around her, and she couldnt help but feel unpleasant.


    However, she had to put up with it.


    A-At least smile.


    Why should I smile for you? Sometimes, you just


    Carynne grinned as widely as she could, revealing her teeth. And <i>she</i> uttered what <i>he</i> was about to say.


    I cant stand being treated like a fool.


    Dun said nothing back.


    Its not him who was truly being treated like a fool.


    Carynne recalled the time when she thought that marriage with Dun might be the answer. But no, that was not the answer. And she didnt know how much he knew.


    He never told Carynne the whole story. He stuttered as always, he pretended to have not known anything, he put that girl in aa, he had dead bodies removed, he dropped Carynne from the tower.


    <i>Who the hell are you?</i>


    Carynne endured the pressing urge to ask all the questions swirling in her mind. Instead, she focused on what she had to do right now. Just do what she could do at the moment.


    Come to my room tonight.


    Then, Dun frowned. Its not that he was angry, nor was he about to curse at her.


    Are you going to lock the door after letting the hounds loose again?


    Ha.


    Damn it, you did that during your tenth birthday.


    Just look at this abominable priest. He knew that Carynne couldnt remember, so hes trying to pry. He had full awareness. He knew, so.


    Lets go right now.


    But Carynne knew his true nature. He was a lustful man. Regardless of how he saw Carynne, this was an unchanging fact. So, he would surely follow Carynnes lead.


    I dont, understand.


    Carynne clung to him. And, she checked her leg.


    Thisdy had a trump card.


    * * *


    Right now, Dun was all tied up and Carynne was sitting on top of him. As soon as they had entered the room, Carynne pointed the gun right at his head.


    Below her, Dun red at Carynne as though he was going to bite her.


    Youre c-crazy. G-Ge Get off.


    There had been a brief struggle between them, but it was easier than she had expected to catch him. Carynne grabbed the hair of the man underneath her.


    Why do you think Im crazy?


    What should she do with this man? Hes still insisting on keeping his mouth shut even after all this.


    I know you made a deal with my mother.


    <i>Thud!</i>


    Still grabbing him by his hair, Carynne hit Duns head against the floor forcefully. His forehead was now bleeding. She heard his weak groan, but it didnt look like he was too hurt. Carynne really wanted to make him feel <i>pain.</i>


    Heres the thing. Let me tell you about one seriously annoying assumption.


    U-Untie me.


    Carynne gripped his hair tightly. She wanted to see this man cry and suffer. Murderous intent and malice were boiling over inside her. However, there was something she had to confirm before that. She needed to get an answer from him.


    Listen here. Im the one whos asking, and youre the one wholl answer. Get it?


    Crazy.


    I told you to <i>shut up.</i>


    Carynne dug her nails into his scalp. Dun went quiet.


    You know, Im guessing that the way my mother stopped this damn repetition is through getting pregnant.


    But Ive never been pregnant. Ever.


    Im barren, and because of that, I I thought Id just live like this forever.


    Ive never once been pregnant. Even after fucking all those men.


    Frustration. Despair. Grief. She was ovee by such negative emotions. But at this very moment, she was determined not to let it consume her.


    Carynne shoved the gun at Duns temple. And, she thought.


    How far was he involved? Why did he know about her coin?


    What did she get from Catherine in exchange for his involvement? And if the assumption Carynne had right now was correct, then hes


    You know Theres this thing.


    suspicious.


    About me being barren.


    Carynne pressed the guns tip hard against his skin.


    If youre the one regrly giving me sedatives, isnt it also possible for you to slip me drugs to make me barren?


    After a while, Dun looked up and spoke. However, his answer was just terrible.


    I-I dont know what youre talking about.


    Hes going to evade it like this?


    Carynne was enraged. Rather than pulling the gun off him, she aimed for his neck. She wanted <i>so much</i> to pull the trigger, but the only thing stopping her was the fact that she wouldnt hear anything at all from him if she killed him now.


    Gritting her teeth, she told herself, <i>You have to put up with it.</i>


    And about how I die and live again. Theres no way you dont know.


    Carynne found out because of what Dun in the past iteration told her. Back then, too, Dun looked like he wasnt afraid of dying. That version of Dun was her basis. However, the current Dun was denying it.


    Y-Y-You suffer from hallucinations. Thats why I studied medicine.


    You admitted it to me before!


    Nothing worked. Dun kept denying it one by one.


    Thats nothnothing but your illusion.


    Keeping the gun aimed at him, Carynne used her other hand to pull out the dagger and stab it right into the back of Duns hand.


    <i>Shluk!</i> Apanied by the loud sound, the dagger prated his hand as she stabbed it with all her strength. Blood gushed out. Duns eyes were wide open.


    Kuh, a-ak!


    Next time, Ill cut off a finger.

 Chapter 149

    Chapter 149


    Ha, haa


    Dun exhaled roughly. As he was breathing heavily underneath her, Carynne thrusted her face against his.


    Dun Dun, darling?


    Crazy.


    Furtively, she drove the dagger deeper into his hand. At this, she narrowed his eyes and red at him.


    Ive married you before, and Ive also broken my engagement with you before, you know?


    Their bodies were so closely pressed together. While he was gasping and bleeding beneath her, it was as if she had taken advantage of him here. What an interesting sight.


    Ha.


    And yet you did nothing at all.


    Then, she wrenched the dagger out. Dun flinched badly. However, Carynne pressed him down with her whole body.


    Until I started killing people.


    Mmh, you think it isnt like that? In any case,st time you told me this and that.


    C-Carynne Hare. Youre crazy. L-Let me go


    <i>Thwack.</i>


    Carynne stabbed him again. This time, she covered his mouth with a pillow because he might scream. She watched as the man between her legs writhed.


    Even in this situation, he still wouldnt speak. Carynne twisted the embedded dagger. She enjoyed the mans convulsions beneath her. As she thought about the past him, she felt refreshed by this.


    But still, until the end, he wouldnt divulge anything.


    Dun. From now on, instead of just stabbing you, Im going to cut your body to pieces little by little.


    Instead of mere groans, something else might slip through your lips sooner orter.


    Will you still keep your mouth shut even when youd just have one or two fingers left?


    I guess well find out once theyre chopped off.


    In her previous life, this man knew about Carynnes repeated lives. Also the coin. Carynne brought the dagger to Duns fourth finger. He struggled even harder.


    Kgh, ah


    Dont be too loud.


    Carynne prodded the gun against his neck. The tremors of his throat passed through the gun. He writhed violently.


    Duns eyes were fixed upon Carynne. She pulled out the pillow that was covering his mouth.


    Y-Youre sick.


    <i>Thwack.</i>


    There was an inaudible scream.


    Do you really think Im an idiot?


    The fleeting thought passed through her mind right then. It would be so funny if someone saw them in this position. Shed look downright crazy in their eyes. Shed look like a madwoman torturing a poor doctor, her pitiful fianc.


    Dun still admitted to nothing. All he said was that Carynnes crazy. He seemed like a normal priest who truly didnt believe anything shes saying.


    Answer You have to answer me. Why arent you telling the truth properly? Why?


    Carynne rammed the gun further under Duns chin. But that did not work either. He continued to deny it.


    Dun.


    She clutched his hair tightly and forcefully brought his head up. His expression became distorted and his mouth opened naturally.


    <i>Wow.</i>


    <i>Seriously.</i>


    Carynne was genuinely <i>furious.</i>


    She knew what she looked like right now. She knew how this situation would turn out. Shes going crazy with anger because she knew damn well just how she looked right now.


    This guy wasnt like Nancy. No matter how scraggly he was, Dun was a young man in his prime.


    Its different from how she had handled Crown Prince Gueuze. Donna had been holding him down, so that lechs focus was elsewhere when Carynne had dealt with him.


    It was difficult for her to subdue Dun. She realized several times that she had made mistakes.


    At the door. When she was tying him up. While she was above him.


    Dun had several chances to overpower Carynne. But he did not.


    You


    Carynne knew well enough. What hes doing right now was no better than ying with her right now. Anything she did to him was not a real threat to him. So, hes allowing her to act like this. Its as if shes his toy.


    And now, here, he looked like the victim. Like a good doctor.


    For a hundred years.


    Her eyes were about to turn white from rage.


    Ive lived for a hundred years now. You think I <i>cant</i> shoot you?


    T-This isnt good for you.


    That was the end of her patience. It felt as if something in her mind broke right then and there.


    <i>BANG!</i>


    A roar echoed. Carynne had put the gun in Duns mouth and pulled the trigger. Blood sttered inside the room. She looked down at the fallen Dun.


    You son of a bitch.


    Dun was still not dead. His eyes had overturned. There was a hole in the roof of his mouth where blood was flowing out constantly. She tapped his lips.


    What? What did you say?


    She leaned down and brought one ear near his lips urgently. Duns mouth was opening and closing. She had to hear it.


    As she drew closer to him, he grabbed her by the neck. For a moment, she thought that he was going to strangle her.


    But thats not it.


    Dun grabbed Carynne by the neck and pulled her close to his lips. Blood flowed constantly. He spoke through his mouth.


    See you next time.


    Then, Dun copsed. The corners of his lips were eerily raised.


    Carynne shoved off his hand and stood up.


    Hah!


    The mans body, now lifeless, rolled back. As he was now, he really wouldnt be able to give her any information.


    Fuck.


    Ah, fuck. I should have tortured him more before killing him.


    Carynne tied her loose hair.


    Im going out of my mind. I need to sort this out.


    Fuck


    What is it about this iteration? I thought Id hear an answer from Dun this time because he mentioned sce to me. But then  the current Dun  was different from thest Dun.


    Nothing about this gave her any sce at all. This iterations Dun just yed her like a fiddle through and through. He didnt even say any of what he knew or didnt know.


    Was Dun the culprit behind all of this? Starting when? Why? And besides that, whats the right thing to do in this situation? How could she find any hope in this? Whats she going to do with this man who ran away through death?


    Let me vent my anger first.


    Carynne picked up the dagger on the floor. She didnt know what to do with her anger. But anger was not good for ones health.


    Before I die, I should vent my anger on Duns corpse.


    But then, at that moment.


    Reverend!


    Carynne felt something hitting her headhard.


    Her vision went ck. Something warm flowed down her face profusely.


    * * *


    The beginning was always the same. The gray sky, the drizzling rain. As she was in the muddy, barren garden, Carynne blinked.


    What the hell.


    Carynne died.


    Its rather fortunate that she could start right away after dying. Carynne knew that she had been killed by someone right after she had killed Dun. She couldnt believe how futile it was.


    Haha


    Out of nowhere,ughter leaked from her lips.


    To the point of absurdity, she was rendered absolutely speechless by her rapid death.


    She killed Dun this time. But soon after, another man killed her.


    Reverend!


    It was a familiar voice.


    How heavily entangled was the connection between those two when she had no idea about it?


    Whats the rtionship between Borwen and Dun?


    Nancy answered calmly as she looked at Carynne, who was pointing a gun at her.


    Reverend Dun healed Borwens mother, so I heard that guys loyal to the priest.


    Carynne thought that he was just a normal attendant. Had she been toocent?


    Sighing, she asked something else.


    Whats his upation before?


    A butcher.


    Birds of a feather, huh.


    Somehow, that would exin why he wasnt surprised when he found out Carynne had killed Missus Deere. She was focused on having fun at that time, but in hindsight, she realized that his behavior back then was not so normal either.


    If youre going to be like this, Mdy, were the only ones whod get exhausted.


    She wondered, would an ordinary servant grumble in the way that he did? Would an ordinary servant clean up dead bodies and make up lies?


    If he had been normal in the first ce, he would have yelled, he would have been at a loss, or he would have reported her to the officials. Carynne was just a daughter of a fief lord, not a princess of the kingdom.


    But then, Borwen took it all in stride. As if he had expected Carynne to do something like that.


    If Donna was the one who saw her that time, or even Nancy, they wouldnt have taken it in such a stride.


    How far does Dun know?


    I-Im not sure?


    Regardless of whether that man was hired and ordered to clean up whatever action she took, it shouldnt have been in the scope of his expectations that Carynne wouldmit murder.


    Have I been too kind all this time, more than I thought?


    Im being serious here. Ive put up with this for much too long.


    Didnt she put up with it for an entire century? Carynne prided herself on surviving all those one hundred years.


    It was not the same one hundred years of an old woman. Its one hundred years for a seventeen-year-old girl.


    What the hell should I believe. Just how far has that guy predicted that he knew Id act like that?


    It became difficult for Carynne to sense just how deeply entrenched Dun was in this. But what she had to do was clear to her.


    She had a goal in mind.


    Maybe, its the same goal from the start.


    As expected, Im gonna have to kill Dun.


    She could try and then die. She torture him all she wanted, and shed eventually get an answer one day.


    Carynne did not lose hope.


    * * *


    Subsequently, Carynne killed Dun three times.


    And, thereafter, she died by Borwens hand three times as well.

 Chapter 150

    Chapter 150


    Where the hell did it go wrong?


    WW-What are you talking about?


    Nancy asked back nervously, eyes fixed on the gun thats pointed at her forehead.


    Ah, sorry. I mixed it up.


    Carynne recalled that she was already done talking with  this iterations Nancy  so she retracted the gun. Since the duration before her deaths had decreased, her memories were all the more jumbled up. Carynne coaxed Nancy, caressing the womans trembling shoulders.


    Dont be so nervous. Its just that Dun crossed my mind, thats why I got a bit irked.


    Y-Yes


    In any case, Carynne didnt like Nancy very much. Its because of Nancy and Dun that her memories were so muddled like this.


    Even so, apart from Nancy, she had no other people to share this with. Carynne shook her head and said,


    Ive been killed by Borwen three times now.


    Ah Yes


    The answer was rather suspicious.


    Didnt you say you believe me?


    I believe you. I solemnly, <i>solemnly</i> swear in the name of God.


    Youre good at saying just anything, arent you.


    Carynne mmed Nancy down on the bed and threw a silver coin at her. Nancy quivered terribly, but quickly snatched the coin nheless.


    I want to kill Dun.


    Is it because Lord Dun knows the truth?


    Yeah. I finally went as far as cutting off Duns fingersst time, but he still refused to say anything.


    I must have truly miseducated you. I didnt raise you like this, Mdy.


    My dear Nancy.


    When Carynne called her, Nancy let out a silent Ack! but soon schooled her features once more.


    Yes, you tried to kill Lord Dun but failed. Then?


    Carynne held back her sigh. She could feel that Nancy was inwardly looking down on her.


    Listen properly.


    Yes.


    Considering that she was the same person who had the ability to dull Carynnes wits, perhaps it was only natural for Nancy to think she was on higher ground. Thats why she was being casual about all this.


    However, Carynne didnt have enough patience to watch Nancy just behave in that way.


    If it sounds like a joke to you, very well. I can just go ahead and cut off one of your fingers. Do you think my father will punish me for that? Or do you think hell cover for me instead?


    Do it right.


    Yes, Mdy.


    Correcting her subordinates attitude was something that a master should naturally do, but she was sick and tired of having to do it each and every time like this.


    Its be routine at this point. Shed threaten Nancy with a gun, wait a few days until Dun would arrive, trap him in her room, try to kill him, but would eventually get murdered by Borwen in the middle of it.


    Oh, maybe itd be easier if I kill Borwen first before Dun?


    How are you going to kill him, Mdy?


    Ill think about that from now on.


    Nancy shook her head at what Carynne said.


    Please dont do that.


    Go ahead and tell me that murder is bad, I dare you.


    No, its not that.


    Nancy spoke more realistically.


    Mister Borwen has a really nasty personality. And hes gotten his hands dirty before.


    You did say that he was a butcher before.


    Yes, but rumor has it that he didnt just kill animals, but also dealt with humans. You know that the attendants and the maids dont get along very well, yes?


    Uh-huh.


    One of the reasons is Borwen. Hes so guileful towards people. Hed be so meticulous with the smallest things, like with ironing clothes <i>very</i> neatly, but he used to be a lot worse.


    From then on, Nancy startedining about Borwen nonstop.


    ording to her, Borwen didnt listen to others properly, except for Dun and the fief lord, but then he persistently admonished others around him if they werent working properly. Its even said that he sometimes went out while inebriated and would take out his anger on the hounds. Besides that, he also went to the bathroom often and handed over his work to other servants.


    After hearing waves upon waves of variousints going around amongst the servants, Carynnes conclusion was simple.


    These guys really dont get along, huh.


    Carynne recalled the way Borwen skillfully chopped up Nancys corpse into pieces without a single ounce of hesitation. Later on, her parts had (probably) been stitched back together so that Dun could perform a simple funeral for her, but the way she had been hacked through clearly held malice in it.


    Carynne couldnt really understand why these people had so much resentment for each other even though they were working together, but she listened as Nancy took a long time to borate on just how much of a jackass Borwen was.


    Alright, so in the end, what is it that you want to say?


    If you want to kill Borwen, Im all for it. You must know that, first, its going to be physically challenging. And second, its Borwen whos been reporting to Lord Dun about your behavior, Mdy.


    You werent the only one?


    At the very least, its the two of us. It caused a lot of friction. That scoundrel pretended he isnt a pervert, but he persistently observed things like your underwear.


    Now, Carynne even found out something that she didnt want to know. Besides that, after being struck in the head by Borwen four times in a row, she just didnt want to get involved with the guy anymore.


    I guess the easiest way to go about it is to kidnap Dun first.


    But so far, its been of little use to do that.


    Carynne bid the end of her pen extender again and thought it over.


    Mdy.


    Hm?


    The goal isnt to kill Borwen.


    Right. Thats not important. Its Dun.


    She just wanted to torture Dun and make him cough up the truth. But none of her methods had proven fruitful thus far.


    That man was not afraid of death. As such, Carynne was certain that this was the mark.


    Killing Dun was not difficult in itself. But it was difficult to wrench out the truth from him.


    Is it that you dont want to die right after killing Lord Dun?


    No, thats not the problem Its just that Im frustrated about not being able to take it out on Duns corpse because I have to restart everything right away, Carynne replied.


    Then, for now, please bear with it. Its not the right time.


    Saying this, Nancy implored for Carynne toy low for now.


    Should I tell you about a story of the past? Nancy suggested.


    Ive had enough of your brainwashing.


    Yes.


    Watching as Nancy left with a bitter smile, Carynne pulled her nket to the top of her head.


    And thats when she knew it.


    Nancy did not believe her.


    Nancy was still trying to stop her from killing people.


    Theyre just going around in circles.


    In the end, was it truly only Dun who believed her?


    Carynne absolutely abhorred that fact.


    Why was that guy refusing to talk?


    * * *


    Hey, just sleep with me once in exchange for telling me the truth. What do you think?


    A w-w-woman of loose morals shall p-plunge to hell


    Wow, seriously.


    Carynne had led Dun to a different ce. It was not her birthday. It was a day when Borwen wasnt herehe went on an errand far away. From the very beginning, the biggest risk factor had been eliminated.


    Please be patient. Its not the right time.


    Thats what Nancy said, but the right time was <i>now</i>.


    Carynne had no clue where exactly Borwen had gone, but she had a pretty good grasp of the servants schedules. So, she went to Dun the day Borwen was far away.


    Youre the one who followed me here though?


    Carynne had been thrilled to watch how Dun followed her after just a word.


    T-T-The victim of temptation is different from the woman who started it


    Come now, this is the fifth time.


    Carynnes patience waspletely gone. Borwen truly wasnt the problem. The man who was both the cause and the effect was the problemDun himself. Regardless of whether she tortured him, slept with him or killed him, he really wouldnt fess up.


    Would things go differently if she were to cut off this thing here thats dangling from his lower body?


    Carynne red at the spot where Duns member was. And, with a knife, she slowly tore through his religious robes. It was exceedingly unpleasant to look at. With a body like his, its better to look at him when hes wearing clothes.


    Let me just cut this off and put it in your own mouth, hm? Really, its not fun for me to do this either.


    I-Ive told you nothing but the truth, so


    This time again.


    Still, she might be able to take her anger out on Duns corpse after killing him this time.


    Carynne raised the knife over her head.


    <i>Creeeak</i>


    Carynne! What are you doing right now!


    As the door was opened, Carynne made eye contact with the man who entered.


    The man who she never would have expected to see here.


    Father.


    Its the first time in a long while that Carynne saw Lord Hare. A strange feeling swept within her as she saw his face.


    When was thest time she looked at his face properly? No, when was thest time she saw his face, period?


    She recalled his face as his corpse was dangling on a noose.


    Please leave, Carynne said.


    What are you going to do if I leave now?


    <i>I will kill Dun, of course.</i>


    However, Carynne knew that she shouldnt say that. The words were stuck in her throat.


    Carynne agonized. In a situation like this, what should she say? Should she say something embarrassing in front of her father? But that wouldnt be a good enough excuse either way.


    We were Well, weve been ying with swords since we were young, so


    A pathetic excuse spilled through her lips. Carynne knew it herself that she sounded stupid. Nevertheless, with how strange it was that she had died many times, the reality that should have grounded her instead escaped her.


    Carynne decided.


    Once the fief lord would leave, shed just go ahead and put the gun to her head and kill herself.


    <i>Thud.</i>


    However, the gun slipped from Carynnes pocket and dropped to the floor.


    I mean, um, we yed with guns as well


    This couldnt go on. Rolling the knife in her hand, Carynne wracked her head. What should she say?


    M-M-Milord, please please save me.


    At once, Dun uttered just one line to convey the entire situation. And, watching as he did this, Carynne was so baffled that she tightened her hands over the knife. <i>Just die, will you?</i>


    <i>Taak.</i>


    Stop it.


    Yeess.


    As the fief lord firmly gripped her wrist, Carynne answered him with a sigh.


    Failure, once again.


    * * *


    Sess.


    Dunughed.

 Chapter 151: The man who doesn’t read books

    Chapter 151: The man who doesn��t read books


    Do you like reading books?


    You must like it, yes. I, too, read books from time to time as well. However, I do not partake in the activity quite a lot.


    As book-loving dreamers would always point out, I have quite unusual habits. I agree with that as well.


    I do not read books until the end.


    The more I like the book, the more this is true.


    As a matter of fact, I have one favorite book.


    It is fun. I love the cover. I like its content as well. I read and stop, read and stop. Read, but never to the end.


    Because Im afraid.


    Hm? Oh, not at all. Its not because I do not like it. Rather, I like the story very much. Neither do I fear that I will not like its conclusion.


    I just do not wish to read the ending.


    Many other people will sympathize with my sentiments. I am not unique.


    As you read books, you inevitably be attached to the characters, support them, and go on an adventure with them. And, once they ovee their trials, you will cheer for them. However, whates next?


    The ending shall draw near. Yes, some people may feel satisfied with this, but then, itll be over? Other people may want the story to continue instead.


    I am of thetter.


    Its for this reason that I do not read to the end. The ending of a story will likely just be ordinary. In all honesty, my favorite book is not a masterful piece of literature. Its just a popr novel. So, I already know the ending. All popr novels must end with, And so, they lived happily ever after. Still, just because the conclusion is already something Ive predicted, it doesnt mean that I want to read the ending with my own two eyes.


    I do not read the ending; I go back to the very beginning of the book. And, I will start reading again from the first page. It doesnt matter anymore to me what the ending is.


    Thus, the story starts anew. Its not the end, but the beginning again. Its the first encounter again, the characters shall go through their trials again, they will build trust and love between them again, and they will ovee it all <i>again</i>.


    Like that, I read the story over and over and over again. Then, within that small story, the illusion that eternity exists shall arise.


    Perhaps, there wille a day that I will not see the end.


    I am not the only one whos like this. In this wide world, it will be difficult to find a unique individual who seems like an ordinary person.


    How many people will be satisfied with a trifle matter like that? Ah, I believe that you will, too.


    Human beings dream of eternal life, but why is it that they cant attain such a thing?


    Love, hatred, ethics, sanctuary. All shall fade of guiltless time. The overwhelming beauty of eternity, in itself, is noble.


    Why look the other way when eternal life is right in front of you?


    Eternity is a beautiful thing.


    Im sure you think so, too.


    * * *


    Catherine asked Dun for a favor.


    Dun stared at her as she was bedridden. Her beautiful face became more and more beautiful. Struggling to open her ashen lips, she asked him. And, a withered hand took Duns hand. Tears flowed down from her purple eyesthe same purple eyes that her daughter had. Desperate wishes whispered through her dry lips.


    I wanted true love. Both my mother and my maternal grandmother said that there was no such thing.


    Thats what I thought as well. Even so, I found true love. And I was able to love him so.


    However, what I thought was love was violence. What I thought was sanctuary was much too short.


    I was wrong.


    But, truly, I hope that Carynne finds true love.


    Can you help me?


    Thank you.


    * * *


    Dun had drugged Carynne.


    Ever since she was fourteen years old. Ever since she started menstruating.


    * * *


    Dunughed.


    117.


    This was the number that the maid told him.


    For one hundred years, he seeded.


    It did not matter that he could not remember.


    It did not matter that he did not know.


    Dun hadmitted a sin.


    However, the day of his punishment will note.


    Carynne shall live forever.

 Chapter 152: 01. The lady on the book

    Chapter 152: 01. Thedy on the book


    Dun and her father caught her and pinned her down to the bed. Then, Lord Hare called Carynne to his office separately. The fief lords eyes on her felt burdensomeas if she was a child who had been caught doing something wrong. And in truth, that was right.


    The wrongdoing she hadmitted wasnt just to the degree of breaking a flowerpot or anything simr, but the act of stabbing someone with a knife.


    What should I say?


    Carynne felt burdened by the fief lords eyes. Should she have insisted that it was a conversation involving no clothes with Dun? She might have seeded with that assertion. However, Carynne had a knife in her hands, and a gun had rolled down from her skirt back then. It would be a bit too much to say that it was a mundane conversation between a future married couple.


    The fief lord looked at Carynne. Heavy silence stretched between them in the office.


    Carynne.


    Yes.


    Its been a long time since the two of us talked like this.


    Yes, it is.


    However, the fief lord couldnt speak easily either. More silence ensued.


    In the end, it was Carynne who started talking again.


    Im sorry. I wont fight like that with Dun Roid again from now on.


    <i>From now on, Im going to torture and kill him without getting caught.</i>


    Ah, no no. She needed to get an answer. Carynne corrected the order of things in her head.


    Seeing as she had failed, it seemed impossible to make a move in  this iteration . Then, shed have to be patient for a little longer. When would be the best time to call Dun?


    Should she take him to the woods or somewhere else, not within the manor? Or, should she try doing it at the cathedral? As expected, shes going to have to cut off that guys prized appendage.


    Carynne.


    ..Im really sorry.


    Shes sorry for being caught.


    Carynne lowered her eyes. Lord Hare sighed.


    Fortunately, there werent any serious injuries. Apologize to himter.


    Yes.


    Whether or not she said sorry, its not such a simple matter that could be solved by a mere apology. Even so, Carynne replied reluctantly. She could never be satisfied with just killing Dun. She could never be satisfied even if she were to hack away at his entire body. If she were to tear him to pieces, she wouldnt stop until she could get the answer she wanted. Shed see until what point that crafty miscreant wouldst.


    Carynne.


    Yes.


    Why do you hate Dun so much? Hes someone dependa Well, hes quite alright.


    Its impossible to call that guy a good husband, even if they were just empty words. Carynne could somehow understand the fief lord now. With a shrug, she replied.


    I already know that hes my doctor.


    Right Hm?


    The fief lord was taken aback. Ah, right. She hadnt yet talked properly with her father in this iteration yet.


    Carynne was frustrated. She had to start from scratch yet again.


    Mother said she fell into a book. I thought I was the same.


    Carynne went on to say one thing after anotherall the things he couldnt bring up. She was sick and tired of it, but she had to do it eventually. This was her task. Just as she did with Nancy.


    Do you believe that I live repeated lives, and that Mother was the same?


    Of course I do.


    But he did not stake his life on that belief.


    Nevertheless, Carynne did not intend to question her father anymore.


    Is true love equivalent to pregnancy and childbirth?


    I dont believe so, no.


    If not, then for people like me and Mother, is it the belief that everythings going to be okay after starting a family?


    <i>Do you believe that having a normal family will solve everything? Are you that nave?</i>


    Lord Hare looked at his daughter. He got up from his seat and took Carynnes hand.


    I always carry that belief with me. I believe that, in the end, you will fall in love and be happy.


    I dont think Dun is the true love that will solve my problem.


    His belief was not to the point of risking his life.


    Carynne couldnt understand herselfwhy did she keep trying toy me on her father? Perhaps Catherine didnt love Lord Hare. Perhaps she just found the right man to get her pregnant.


    Then what is the point?


    The question brought more shock to her mothers face rather than her own.


    Though not all of them, my memories areing back little by little.


    That must be why youre in shock.


    No, that was a small thing. Rather than herself, it looked like her father was the one whos more shocked.


    Father, its all over once I get pregnant and give birth to a baby. But Ive heard that Im barren. So, Im going to live this repetitive life forever.


    But isnt it strange? What if Dun, the man next to me who said hell help me, is the one who has made me infertile? Are you not suspicious?


    Carynne swallowed all the questions she couldnt ask. She didnt know how much she could tell Lord Hare. Even if she were to say everything, how far would he go to help her?


    Do you believe me when I say that Ive lived repeated lives?


    I believe you.


    Letting out a deep sigh, the fief lord touched his forehead.


    Carynne.


    Yes.


    You have not liked Dun very much ever since you were a child.


    I didnt?


    Yes. It had gotten to a point that you locked him in a room where you had let the hounds loose.


    Despite what he said, there was a slight smile on the fief lords lips.


    I can see that you still dislike Dun. Ill dissolve the engagement as if it never happened.


    Lets slowly find you a suitable groom.


    Before she knew it, time passed once again.


    In this iteration, this was how her break-up with Dun would go.


    Let me tell Dun about it.


    Yes, Carynne answered.


    Documents were piled up like hills on the fief lords office desk. Carynne looked at the papers and thought about the time ahead that shed have to repeat. Ise and Verdic woulde again.


    Shed meet Ise, and the estate would fall into Verdics hands. Such a year would be repeated once more.


    She was so tired of it. She just wanted to get an answer as soon as she could, even if she had to die several times in the beginning. Expediency didnt seem to prove fruitful.


    Yet again, time marched on.


    In this iteration, Carynne eventually did not get an answer from Dun.


    Then, what should she do with Ise this time? Were they supposed to be friends? Carynne fumbled with her scattered memories. What should she do with Ise?


    Carynne.


    Yes, Father.


    Why dont you go on a trip? Youve been cooped up at home for too long.


    Carynnes eyes went wide open. What was her father talking about now?


    With you, Father?


    It will be difficult for me toe with you because I have a lot of work.


    Then, with whom? Carynne mulled it over.


    Dont tell me its with Dun


    No. In a situation like this, I wont force you to improve your rtionship with him. Just go on a trip and rest. And see new things.


    Ah, now she understood. Thats how its going this time. Carynne was convinced. It didnt happen a lot, but there were times when she stayed in a vi with Ise. It wasnt bad there either.


    With Miss Ise?


    Carynne recalled the trip she went on, apanying Ise. She went on that trip as Ises maid, and while taking care of the girl, she was persecuted as usual. Was such a routine going to be repeated once again? Ises arrival was right around the corner. Would she wear that ne again this time?


    If Nancy was next to her, it would be fun to watch Nancy steal Ises ne. Ah, now that she thought about it, their entourage should have arrived by now. Were they a littlete this time?


    Miss Ise?


    Yes. Then, please inform me when well be leaving.


    The fief lord asked with a strange expression.


    Who is Ise?


    Huh?


    nkly, Carynne asked back.


    Ise. Ise Evans. Her rival. Verdic Evanss daughter.


    Those people will be taking our estate. Father, its impossible that you dont know those people.


    Why was her father saying this?


    Carynne was a little scared.


    She tried to speak urgently, but instead, her voice trembled.


    V-Verdic I mean, Evans''s daughter.


    No way.


    Her heart was pounding. Was Ise just a figment of her imagination? Was she actually mentally ill? Was it all just her own delusion, that girl who abhorred her ugly fianc?


    Once again, anxiety held her with a vice grip. This repeated fear and curiosity surged. What if her father would say that there was no such person in the world?


    Ah. That mans daughter?


    However, the fief lord nodded the moment he heard the surname.


    He did send a letter saying that helle with his daughter Right, it seems thats her name. But how did you know it?


    Well.


    Its just, she had been with her all this time.


    I just heard it by chance.


    As the fief lord saw Carynnes expression, he decided not to ask anything more.


    She wont being with you. Ill assign a maid and a coachman to you, so go to a rtives residence in the meantime.


    Yes.


    Something was off.


    Carynne asked again.


    But our households financial situation Isnt it precarious right now?


    This entire situation was strange. Carynne had never traveled alone before. Their households finances were in dire straits. Besides that, women rarely traveled alone. Whenever Carynne went on a trip, she always had Ise next to her. If not her, then either Dun or Raymond.


    We shouldnt be able to afford a solo trip for myself, right?


    Yet the fief lord shook his head. His expression looked bright.


    The business that I was trying to expand has beenpletely canceled. Were alright for the time being.


    Huh?


    Come to think of it, theres something Id like you to do for me on your way.


    Ise did note.


    This had never happened in one hundred years.


    A huge change was urring.

 Chapter 153

    Chapter 153


    Mdy, how much longer?


    Not yet. Just finish organizing things a bit more over there.


    Carynne was reading the documents her father had entrusted to her.


    And let me finish reading this.


    Everythings ready.


    Nancy came forward with three big bags in her hands. As expected, she was strong. Shes robust and talented. Shed have been an impable maid if not for her itchy hands. Oh, and also if not the asional brainwashing. Thatst parts a huge dealbreaker.


    Setting down thest of Carynnes luggage, even a small purse atop the other bags, Nancy asked.


    What must be done?


    Ill have to pay Verdic Evans a visit and make him sign all necessary documents regarding his relinquishment of the business.


    The immediate change that urred in this iteration was that Ise and Verdic Evans were noting to this residence. But of course, this didnt mean that Carynne wouldnt be meeting them at all.


    Still, this alone was such an enormous change that it puzzled Carynne.


    Go directly to Verdic Evans, have him stamp and sign it. Were already done discussing it, so all you need to do is go there and have him do that.


    Despite everything, it would be unwise not to read through the contract properly. Maybe in this iteration, Verdic intended toy a bigger business trap.


    But I cant find anything.


    Though she had scrutinized every single word, Carynne couldnt find anything wrong with the contract. It was just a neatly written document.


    Why the hell?


    Carynne knew everything about how the business would go. Its quite unthinkable that Verdic was pulling out now. Testament to this was how the man had gone on to adopt Carynne for the mere sake of continuing the business.


    Even if it wasnt a ce where money grew on trees, the Hare estate was renowned in its own way. And considering just how much Verdic had already invested thus far, its just too unlikely.


    After all that, was he really going to throw it all away?


    Has Verdic gone mad?


    This move would just put him at a deficit. By all ounts, theres absolutely no sensible reason for him to do such a thing. Hes been preparing for this business even far before the point of time that Carynne would start the loop anew.


    Mdy!


    Fine. Iming.


    Carynne put away all of the papers that she was reading. Its impossible to understand. And besides, its not as if she could do anything about it.


    Has everything been packed?


    At Carynnes question, Nancy nodded as though she was waiting.


    Ive packed your clothes and belongings, Mdy. It even seems like <i>most</i> of what you own has been packed But anyway, please check it.


    You already did it personally so its fine. Did you pack enough socks?


    Yes. Mdy, Shall I pack the chestnut-colored dress as well?


    No. Its too outdated so I dont like it. Ill get new dresses in town.


    Carynne put on the fief lords si ring on her finger. She herself was the proxy. It would be ever so simple to go to Verdic, stamp the documents and formally discard it.


    I heard a rumor that the clothes there are nice.


    This was a good thing. Carynne knew not only Verdics mansion in the capital well, but also Verdics vi in the countryside. The seamstresses and the fabrics they had were pretty good.


    Just the thought of being able to get fitted for new clothes made Carynne feel better. She wouldnt have to grovel in front of Iseshe had the ability to purchase things through her fathers money.


    Good.


    Ill buy it <i>aaall</i> with money.


    Thats swell and all, Mdy, but will you be the one doing the signing? Not Lord Dun?


    My birthday has already passed. Im an adult already. Im qualified to be Fathers proxy. Its not like me and Dun got married. Borwen, load that over there.


    Carynne pointed out therge trunk to Borwen, who was standing by the door.


    Dont say anything to Dun.


    Why would I do such a


    If you dont, then good.


    Carynne hit Borwen lightly. The mere sight of his face was giving her a headache.


    * * *


    The carriage ran for a long time, and Carynne gazed at the flitting scenery out the window. She had gone this road many times before, but it was the very first time that there was no one by her side. Not Dun, not Raymond, not her father.


    Mdy, please bring your head back in. Well be entering the forest in a little while.


    So?


    Its dangerous because of the branches, of course.


    Carynne leaned back again.


    Its been a while since Ive heard your nagging.


    What do you mean?


    It wasnt youst time, but someone else.


    You hired a maid other than me? When exactly?


    In a past life.


    Ahh.


    Nancy had been in high spirits until now, but her mood soon dampened.


    Carynne chuckled. Staring at Carynne for a moment, Nancy asked.


    Theeen Why did you hire someone else?


    <i>Because I killed you. I got bored in that past life, so I tried to see what would change if you died. And really, the beginning changed quite a lot. What would change again if I killed you one more time?</i>


    Of course, Carynne didnt say that. She wasnt in the mood to do so right now. She chose to say the partial truth.


    You died.


    How?


    Nancy asked back in a slightly shocked tone.


    An ident.


    What kind of ident?


    Just something that happened. Why are you asking so much? You said you dont believe me.


    When Nancy kept prying, Carynne replied nonchntly.


    <i>Anyway, you dont even believe me. I wont give you the answer you want to hear.</i>


    Nancy grumbled back.


    Even if I dont believe it, its still unsettling. I cast divinations as well, but I dont put my faith in it. But I do cast it once in a while out of curiosity.


    If you dont believe it, why bother with the divinations?


    Say, I eat tomatoes on one particr day and have a nightmare that night about dying, thatll be the reason why I wont like eating tomatoes the next day.


    Carynne blinked. As expected, she couldnt understand.


    It was Donna.


    Donna who?


    One of theundry maids. Brown hair, one year older than me The one who braids her hair into pigtails.


    When Carynne exined in detail, Nancy tilted her head to the side and soon remembered.


    Ah, her. But why her? She cant possibly be better than me at this job.


    Who knows.


    Theres not much reason behind it. Carynnes father and Dun knew that she had killed Nancy.


    They assigned a slightly less capable, weaker young woman who was around her age as her personal maid. Probably a kid who just wouldnt be looked for if she ever disappeared and died one day.


    Of all people, its Donna from theundry area. It hurts my pride a little.


    Why?


    Everyone who works with her really dislikes her. Shes a good kid, but a bit tactless.


    <i>But shes braver than you think.</i>


    Even when one leg and one arm had been hacked off of her, she persevered until the very end to crawl forward and sink her teeth into the crown princes legwithout fear of guns and swords.


    I see.


    At that moment, Carynne felt a little lonely.


    She felt that she wouldnt ever meet <i>that</i> Donna again, not unless shed repeat the same things as before. Kill Nancy, chop Thomas to pieces, watch her father die in a fire.


    Is Donna still aundry maid now?


    Yes. If youd like, Mdy, should I have her reassigned to you? Ill send a telegram to Helen when I go back.


    No, never mind.


    She didnt want to act the same way and see the same things. If she did that, the novelty would just fade. She wanted to leave that life to that iteration.


    If it gets too hard, I can erase your memories.


    Nancy reached out to hold Carynnes hand.


    Because thats what Im here for.


    However, Carynne pulled her hand back.


    Dont. I just want it to stay this way.


    Closing her eyes, Carynne folded her hands together.


    Even if she was exhausted, even if she was sad, she wished to be intoxicated with sorrow.


    * * *


    Verdic Evans met Carynne as his hair was very disheveled.


    Its nice to meet you, Lady Carynne Hare.


    Its the first time Carynne was seeing him with his hair so messy. He <i>always</i> had it neatly sculptured with grease.


    But now, his hair was disheveled, his clothes were crumpled.


    Lady Hare, are you here as His Lordships proxy?


    Yes, Ivee here on behalf of my father. Is it an inconvenient time for me to havee?


    Ah, no. Its alright.


    The current Verdic didnt even seem to notice that Carynne was staring at his hair.


    You really do get to see all sorts of things the longer you live.


    Carynne, who was staring at him, slightly pinched up the skirt of her dress and followed after him with a steady gait. <ul ss="abh_tabs"> <li>Author</li><li>Recent Posts</li><section ss="vcard author abh_about_tab abh_tab" itemscope itemprop="author" itemtype="http://schema.org/Person"><a href = /trantor/yonnee" ss="url" target = "_nk" title = "yonnee" rel="nofollow" > <img /wp-content/uploads/gravatar/c43puniweaardlc-2.jpeg?w=250&ssl=1" ss="photo" alt="yonnee" data-recalc-dims="1" /></a > yonneeSole trantor of Subliminal WayfarerAlso affiliated with BR and PD </section><section ss="abh_posts_tab abh_tab" ><img /wp-content/uploads/gravatar/c43puniweaardlc-2.jpeg?w=250&ssl=1" ss="photo" alt="yonnee" data-recalc-dims="1" /> Latest posts by yonnee (see all)<ul></ul> </section>

 Chapter 154

    Chapter 154


    Sign here, here and here.


    Carynne scanned the documents once more. And it was as she thoughtthere werent any problems.


    Carynne signed as well and received the documents that Verdic had signed.


    Then, now our ties with each other have been severed.


    Yes, Carynne answered.


    Kindly tell your father that Ill have the minor equipment removed by next month.


    I will.


    It was so swift and simple that it was almost chilling.


    Carynne stood up. The attendant by the door opened it in a polite manner. As Verdic followed her, he spoke.


    Since the sun is about to set, will you be staying?


    No, I have my own amodation downtown.


    She did not want to stay in the house of the man who had killed her several times before. She didnt know what the reason behind this progression was, but its not as if he would tell her if she asked.


    Ah, um Is that so? Then, have a good evening.


    Yes. Farewell.


    Despite everything though, wasnt it only polite to insist for about three times? Why was he being so rude?


    Carynne was expecting that she would have to say no a few more times. She frowned. Right now, she was neither his maid nor his adopted daughter.


    Even so, Verdic didnt even notice her change in expression.


    Lets go.


    As Carynne walked to the waiting carriage, she spoke to Nancy and Borwen, who were still engaged with a war of nerves with each other. Caught in between, the coachman was visibly happy to see Carynne and hurriedly prepared to set off.


    Leaving so soon, Mdy?


    Seems so.


    I thought youd be staying here.


    It looked like the household head had too much on his hands. Lets go downtown, there should be an inn there.


    Yes.


    Then, Carynne elbowed Nancy at her side. The maids expression was severely crumpled.


    Whyd you fight again?


    We didnt fight.


    But whats with you and Borwen now?


    It felt like Borwen got in touch with Lord Dun, so I confronted him about it. Did I do a good job?


    Yes, good job


    Where was this brazennessing from? Was it because she was a hypnotist, an immigrant and a maid with no money?


    Carynne recalled how Nancy had been decapitated by Borwen. Sure, it was Carynne who killed the maid, but it was Borwen who chopped her to several pieces.


    Still, dont be so forward. You might just get stabbed by a knife one day.


    Im not like that


    As Nancy replied, she nced at the coachman. Carynne knew that the coachman was into Nancy before, and was still into her now.


    That reminds her, why did he like Donna back then, not Nancy?


    Aha.


    Carynne soon found out the answer.


    The coachman was the easiest guy amongst the servants. It seemed like he had tested Nancy and also a few here and there, all except Carynne.


    * * *


    What a predicament.


    Borwen came back. While ignoring Nancy, he talked to Carynne.


    What is?


    All the inns are closed right now. Its a mess.


    Why is that?


    I heard that Verdic Evans daughter has disappeared.


    Was the biggest change in this iteration Ise Evans? Carynne was stunned. The story just kept going down such strange paths.


    So thats why he was so unkempt. Ise Evans disappeared.


    Yes. I suppose so. It might be difficult for us to stay here because theyre searching through the whole town right now.


    If Carynne hade here alone, she would have stayed here though, and even helped find Ise. She wanted to see with her own eyes exactly what things had changed.


    <i>I want to kill them all.</i>


    However, Carynne looked at Nancy and Borwen. And also the coachman. Her gun had already been confiscated from her.


    In the end, all she could do now was to make the proper call as these peoples master. Carynne didnt want to, but she gave this suggestion.


    Then, should we go to the next town?


    If we can move quickly, we may be able to arrive before nightfall, the coachman replied.


    Theres no other way. Lets go.


    Even as Carynne had given this order, she continued to look around town as the carriage ran forward, gazing towards Ises vi.


    Ise Evans had disappeared.


    What changed? How did it change? Carynne was so curious.


    Ise Evans had disappeared and Verdic Evans had pulled out of the business venture.


    Just how exactly would things progress from now on?


    * * *


    The coachman groaned.


    Im so, so sorry.


    I know its not your fault.


    Carynne sighed. Strangely enough, they had encountered many obstacles on every streettrees knocked down, rocks scattered everywhere. There was even luggage right in the middle of the street, dropped by the owner. Out of curiosity, Carynne wanted to check it out, but Nancy stopped her.


    Its dangerous to go out when were in the middle of the woods like this.


    Before they knew it, the moon had already risen to the middle of the sky, even as the carriage was still going down the forest path.


    Would a bear appear? Carynne raised her head and counted. Now that she thought about it, there was a time when such dangerous things happened often. Perhaps in this iteration, shed be mauled by a wild animal.


    Mdy, I think we might need to stop for the night at the open clearinging up soon. Theres a watchtower at that ce.


    Sure.


    But the moment they arrived, Carynne could only blink. She didnt expect this at all.


    Is it here?


    Of all ces.


    Carynne looked up at the tall tower in front of her.


    It was the tower where she fell to her death at the age of 117.


    * * *


    It felt quite strange to sleep in a ce where she had once died. Well, she did also die many times in her own home, but she had a fairly striking death in this particr tower. It seemed like this would be a sleepless night.


    The doors locked. Will it be alright? Wont the owner be angry? Carynne asked.


    I think itll be fine though? Its Verdic Evans private property anyway, Mdy. It doesn''t make sense for us to sleep in the woods, and its only right for people to make use of a ce like this, Nancy answered.


    I heard its also used as a ce to enact the death penalty.


    If you get any nightmares, Ill erase them.


    Even as a joke, quit saying that.


    Carynne and Nancy entered the room at the top of the tower. The entrance of the tower itself had been locked, but it took only a few shimmies of a hairpin for Nancy to unlock it. She recalled how Verdic Evans, the owner of this tower, had to have this door broken down before he could even go up, but it seemed like it wasnt much of a lock anyway.


    In any case, we can just give some money to the custodian if hees, Nancy said flippantly.


    There were bloodstains all over the ce when she had been here in her previous life, but theyre nowhere to be found now. So, when did those get sttered?


    Carynne pulled up the nket that Nancy had ced over her. Thinking about how someone else was going to bleed in this tower before her death, she felt a bit ufortable.


    Still, you cant sleep in the carriage, Mdy. You cant sleep out in the open either.


    Fine.


    Yes, this was the best way to go about it. Carynne didnt bother to voice her stance. She knew that it would be dangerous to go back to the woods anyway. Doing this wasmon sense.


    Ah, Carynne really wanted to go on a trip to a ce where no one was.


    A trip where none of the main characters were present. No father, no Dun, no Raymond, no Ise. She did not want to give up on this trip. No matter how the tides turned, Carynne was willing to enjoy the changes happening around her.


    Well be setting off as early as daybreak. Please hang in there.


    Life has changed, so it will have meaning.


    Carynney back down, snug beneath the nket. She couldnt sleep right away. Again and again, she was arrested by the feeling of gravity pulling her down. Again and again, she heard the auditory hallucinations of someone banging on the door relentlessly.


    But no, its alright. In this life, Verdic Evans had no interest in her. In this life, she and Ise Evans didnt even meet.


    However, Carynne still dreamed.


    She dreamed that Dun was here, that he stepped on her hand and drove her to a plummeting death.


    .


    .


    .


    Then, someone woke her up.


    Get up.


    It was still before daybreak. Carynne had to open her eyes to a rough touch, shaking her awake violently.


    Cant I sleep a little longer?


    But the hand continued to be harsh. Feeling irritated at the rising pain, Carynne opened her eyes. She couldnt see properly because it was still too dark.


    While rubbing her eyes, she looked up at the person in front of her.


    Who are you?


    It was a man. A man she was seeing for the first time.


    Not just in this life, but in all her repeated lives thus far.


    The man roughly pulled her up, and she looked around in bewilderment. There werent just one or two people here.


    Clutching Carynnes hair, the man spoke in a ruthless tone.


    Who are you and whats your connection to Verdic Evans?


    Then, he raised Carynne to her feet.


    What exactly are you Foreigners?


    The thick ent was that of thend beyond the White Mountain Range. Carynne looked at the man who was detaining her.


    Hes not alone in this room. One, two Theres at least six of them in this room, both old and young. Its like a family trip.


    However, their expressions didnt look good at all.


    Answer.


    She was sleeping up until a few seconds ago, but these people suddenly came in and were doing this. What exactly was going on right now?


    Still half-asleep, Carynne shook her head. She needed an exnation.


    Nancy?


    Mmph mmmph


    The maid was here. However, she was gagged. Borwen and the coachman were nowhere in sight.

 Chapter 155

    Chapter 155


    The man looked at the people behind him. The old man there shook his head. It seemed like he didnt know either. Seeing that answer, Carynne figured that these people were clueless about this ce.


    Verdic Evans and hisnd was not very close, though it was still only just one day away by carriage. These people looked like they hade from far away, especially judging by their foreign ent.


    We are in the middle of our journey going back, Carynne exined. It got dark out, so we took shelter in this ce to avoid the wild animals.


    I dont believe you. How are you connected to Verdic Evans?


    We arent very connected.


    This forest is part of hisnd.


    He tried to buy my fathers estate, but he canceled the deal. Thats why Im hereto sign the necessary documents in lieu of my father.


    Shes already saying everything meekly like this, wasnt she? But the metal against her neck was still persistently there. The man looked back and spoke.


    Just mere words.


    No, wait a second.


    One of the clueless men behind spoke up. He looked down scathingly at Carynne with a scowl. That man, who Carynne did not know.


    I remember seeing that face before.


    I recently celebrated my seventeenth birthday.


    Who is your mother?


    So thats how he recognized her. Carynnemented her fathers lowly name and reputation. <i>Father,e on. You have to at least make an effort.</i>


    My mother was Catherine Nora Hare. Her maiden surname was Enide.


    Ah, that woman is the great-granddaughter of Grand Duchess Ca.


    Those people started talking for a moment. The old man, who had been behind everyone until now, walked forward with his cane and approached Carynne. This was a pretty tall tower, but they did a good job dragging this old man all the way up here.


    Why are you here?


    We were trying to go somewhere else, but we got lost in the woods.


    I repeated the answer that I already gave them before.


    Pardon me, but may I ask your name? Carynne asked.


    It would be better if you dont know. Do you really want to hear it?


    Then, I do not wish to hear it.


    That is wise.


    The old mans cane met the floor with a <i>thud.</i>


    What should we do with you?


    We have to kill her. It wont do us any good to keep her captive, said the man who had recognized Carynne.


    Do we really need to do that?


    I heard a rumor that shes an illegitimate child of Crown Prince Gueuze.


    Theres a rumor like that?


    In her surprise, Carynnes mouth gaped open. It was the first time she heard this unpleasant rumor.


    So, Crown Prince Gueuze called her like that even though he knew that she might be his daughter? No matter how long she had lived until now, <i>that</i> was so messed up.


    As she was inwardly boiling with anger while thinking about Crown Prince Gueuze, the others talked about whether to keep Carynne alive or not.


    Verdic and Prince Gueuze are quite connected.


    That man is a merchant. Its no wonder hes trying to reach out to other countries.


    Ive never heard of that family having a daughter, but if shes Crown Prince Gueuzes child, this will definitely reach his ears.


    <i>Daughter? </i>That very word sent a jolt through Carynne. She refuted the mans im in an instant.


    I am not Crown Prince Gueuzes daughter.


    At the very least, she <i>must</i> deny that. Perhaps she would have more leverage when negotiating with them if she did not contest this, but she loathed the idea. Utterly.


    However, nobody listened to her.


    I dont know why Verdic hasnt sent a messenger yet. You guys wait here, Ill go to him alone.


    Its probably because Ise Evans is missing, thats why hes been so out of sorts, Carynne interjected.


    At this, they finally listened to what she had to say. The old man replied.


    How do you know that?


    I told you. I went there for business on behalf of my father, and Im on my way back.


    Are you talking about Crown Prince Gueuze?


    Carynne held back a sigh.


    And as I told you earlier as well, no. Please do not disparage my mothers honor.


    But this time yet again, they still didnt listen to Carynne. They talked amongst themselves fervently and anxiously. They were a foreign family, extremely wary of royalty, and had joined hands with a merchant.


    Ah, Carynne remembered. She heard that there were some aristocrats who crossed the border to escape war. Carynne was amazed to see the people she had only heard about before now right before her eyes. Besides that, theyre connected to Verdic.


    Hi?


    There was a little girl peeking from behind the old man, and Carynne waved at her. She looked just a little older than Lady Lianne. However, what Carynne was answered with wasnt a smile like Liannes, but an anxious look.


    She took a step back. Carynne lowered her hand, feeling slightly awkward.


    As expected, it wont work.


    The old man approached her once again.


    Miss Carynne Hare, you must die. Were in a difficult situation, too. We cant afford any factors that could affect us badlyter on.


    I was just passing by, and this was a stop over I made by chance. Let me go and I wont say anything.


    I apologize.


    Carynne watched as the old man apologized to her. His clothes were of high quality. Unlike the man who had shaken her awake, there was no awkwardness in his ent. Then, she looked at the granddaughter.


    Perhaps she knew who they were. Raymond once told her about a noble family who had entrusted themselves to Verdic.


    Carynne blinked.


    Is that so?


    This time again, hardship and threats came to her.


    Whenever a chance would arise in front of her, its always like thisthreats always found her. That was the case again this time.


    Carynne looked at the old man, and the child, and the man, then the woman. Their eyes carried desperation. Beyond their rugged cloaks, clothes made of the finest fabrics could be seen.


    She wondered if she should just die this time and start over. It wouldnt be bad to die quickly unless she had another choice.


    I was just sleeping. Nothing would have happened to either of us if you hadnt woken me up. You know that, right?


    I apologize.


    The old man got up. Carynne looked at him. The other man handed something to Carynne.


    Whats this?


    Please understand that we have no other choice either. Please hang yourself, or well do it for you.


    Wasnt this too fast?


    Carynne smiled as she looked down at what was in front of her. These people were serious. Carynne looked at Nancy, who was all tied up and slowly falling unconscious. Borwens probably dead now.


    This time, Carynne felt a little sorry for Nancy. The servants werent even given a choice. Carynne just so happened to be wearing better clothes, and that was enough for her to be given a choice of how to die.


    She wondered if she should consider herself lucky.


    Carynne grabbed the fabric with her hands.


    I understand. Then, please go out, Duke Luthe.


    She didnt care that he was surprised.


    How.


    Carynne did not hang herself. Nevertheless, she didnt have much of a choice left.


    She looked outside. Thats where she had fallen before. Then, the door. They woulde inside right after to confirm whether she had hung herself. There were no guns.


    However, she was not scared.


    Death was so familiar to her now. And, there was something else thats more important. She was curious about it.


    She counted the days that she was left all alone. Even if she wasnt inside a novel, certain things happened repeatedly on some particr days in these repeated lives.


    Carynne was well aware that hardships always followed at around this time. Today was that day. Sometimes, she was in danger of being r*ped. Sometimes, she would get mauled by a beast. Sometimes, she would fall. She was met with various kinds of danger.


    But that was not what mattered.


    Carynne was well aware of what day she was set to die. But after the number 117, she found out that she could die before that predetermined day.


    What about today? Who were these people? This iteration had gotten twisted.


    What was the probability of her meeting her demise today? And likewise, what was the probability of her surviving to see another day? Which was higher?


    But if she waited a little longer, she would know the answer.


    So, she waited.


    She waited for the answer.


    <i>Knock, knock.</i>


    She heard someone knocking on the door.


    And, Carynne seemed to know who it was on the other side. It was an intense sense of dj vu.


    Who was it that always came to visit her on this day?


    Between hanging herself and finding out who it was, standing outside that door. What Carynne found more frightening was thetter.


    Without saying anything, she stared at the door. She had a strong feeling of who it was just outside.


    The man who always came to her rescue.


    Raymond Saytes.


    Her knight.


    However, Carynne was afraid to confirm it.


    It might not be him. Maybe it was just Duke Luthe and the other people in his group,ing here to see whether or not she had already killed herself.


    Rather, she preferred that oue. In Carynnes perspective, Duke Luthe was no different from Thomas, the alleyway r*pist.


    Hardships always found her around this time. She was not scared of death. She woulde back to life anyway. Then, in the next iteration, she could just choose not to stay in this tower. She would just continue traversing through the forest.


    But.


    If its him <ul ss="abh_tabs"> <li>Author</li><li>Recent Posts</li><section ss="vcard author abh_about_tab abh_tab" itemscope itemprop="author" itemtype="http://schema.org/Person"><a href = /trantor/yonnee" ss="url" target = "_nk" title = "yonnee" rel="nofollow" > <img /wp-content/uploads/gravatar/c43puniweaardlc-2.jpeg?w=250&ssl=1" ss="photo" alt="yonnee" data-recalc-dims="1" /></a > yonneeTrantor </section><section ss="abh_posts_tab abh_tab" ><img /wp-content/uploads/gravatar/c43puniweaardlc-2.jpeg?w=250&ssl=1" ss="photo" alt="yonnee" data-recalc-dims="1" /> Latest posts by yonnee (see all)<ul></ul> </section>

 Chapter 156

    Chapter 156


    He always came at around this time. Always. <i>Always.</i> The ce was different now and then, but the chance, the necessity, and the intention. None of those changed. He <i>always</i> met Carynne.


    Until now, it had been within the bounds of the Hare estate, even when the actual ces differed. Still, it would not hinder the fact that he would meet Carynne, no matter the setting. Just as ever.


    But what about this time?


    She knew it in her head. This time would be the same yet again. Shes in danger, and Raymond would save her. Ise would be jealous, and Verdic would get mad. Just as ever, these instances would repeat themselves. It was at the beginning of this cyclical year that she was already so sick and tired of. This cyclical year without any smidgen of stimtion.


    <i>Knock, knock.</i>


    Once more, someone knocked from outside the door. Was it him out there? If he was, nevertheless, it would not surprise her.


    But even so, Carynne found herself afraidafraid to confirm it.


    Carynne had not spoken to Donna since she was 117 years old. She did not wish to meet her again. She only saw the maid from a distance, being bullied by the other maids, but Carynne no longer wished to have a close rtionship with Donna. She just wished to recall <i>that</i> life as it was. She wished to preserve it. She wished to leave behind sadness as sadness, and frustration as frustration.


    If such things were to repeat, then the novelty of the experience would not be impactful anymore. Even if she was not from outside the novel, it still felt like it.


    Shes getting sick of everything. Including Raymond.


    Hes someone who could not remember all the years before. For Carynne, all the people here besides herself were characters made from ink. Even if there was no world outside the novel, nothing had changed.


    Carynne knew.


    Originally, she would have weed the unexpected presence of the aging Duke Luthe rather than Raymonds appearance. Raymond was a man she continuously saw each and every year, whereas Duke Luthe was someone she had never met before.


    But now, Carynne was distressed about confirming Raymonds imminent appearance. Just like how distressing it was to see Donna. It was the same bitter feeling that she would have as she recalled how she had failed in the end in that iteration.


    She had a strong feeling that she would fail again this time.


    Donna could not remember. Nancy could not remember. Dun, who she had tortured to death numerous times, also could not remember.


    It was an established fact that no longer needed to be confirmed.


    Raymond would be the same.


    Carynne did not want to see his face.


    If they were to meet again this time, she would have to apologize to him, thank him, fall in love with him. Or maybe this time, she could tell him the whole truth once more and propose that they be on the same side. Perhaps this time, they would be able to stab Crown Prince Gueuze on the back, or perhaps they could eradicate Verdicpletely.


    There was also the option of revisiting her mothers history, or participating in the conflicts and wars between the great aristocrats and the royal family, which involved Duke Luthe, Crown Prince Gueuze and Prince Lewis.


    But Carynne loathed to think of all that.


    She did not want to be acquainted again. She did not want to repeat it again and again and <i>again</i>to act as if she was being saved by him for the first time, as if she did not know who he was in the first ce. She despised living. She despised being in love. Shes so sick and tired of even breathing.


    So, Carynne did not open the door. She did not want to answer. All she wanted to do was this: run away. If it was not Raymond on the other side of the door, she was going to die anyway. And if it was Raymond, it was no worse than death itself. Perhaps its because that iteration was the first time she had done her best to extend such courtesy towards Raymond. There were so many reasons. Carynne wanted to lock the door. If not that, she wanted to just hang herself.


    <i>Creak</i>


    But regardless of her will, the door opened. The man outside no longer waited for Carynnes answer. The door was not locked. Unlike how it was before, the door now opened much too easily. No one had locked the door.


    For a moment, it felt to Carynne as if time had slowed down tremendously.


    The first thing she could see was the mans hand. Just with that, she already knew who it was. Then, whats revealed next were his arms, his clothes.


    With the sunrise behind him, he appeared.


    This time again, it was just as Carynne had expected. Her knight hade to her rescue. Even his clothes were the same. Yet again, it was the same dark military uniform. Too dark to tell whether or not there was blood sttered on it. From his hand, <i>thunk,</i> his gun slipped and hit the floor. It was the same one he always used.


    There was no plot twist.


    This time again, he came to save Carynne. Or, perhaps he was swept away by some other force and happened to face Carynne.


    Whatever it was, Carynne did not doubt him. Even as she hadmitted murder, he remained to be on her side. This time again, he would be on Carynnes side. This would never change.


    Carynne thought.


    <i>What should I say this time? Thank you? No, who are you? If not that, please save me? I dont know which one will sound more natural.</i>


    The rays of the rising sun shone from behind Carynne. Before she knew it, the sun had risen from the horizon, and morning had alreadye. Yet again, another terrible and tiresome day hade. Yet again, she met Raymond.


    Raymonds hair and his face were revealed. Carynne lowered her gaze. She did not know what kind of expression to make. Shed rather close her eyes.


    She gritted her teeth.


    <i>I cant expect anything. I cant.</i>


    Though she could not speak of it, she felt miserable. She didnt have to feel this way, but this was how it was.


    She heard footsteps.


    Hes approaching.


    <i>What should I say?</i> Carynne thought. <i>I dont know. I dont know.</i>


    Nevertheless, she had already lost the chance to run away. She needed to talk to him. She needed to ask who he was. As if its her first time meeting him. She needed to give him a natural answer.


    She raised her gaze. Raymonds chin, his lips, his nose. Then, his eyes became visible. His face was as beautiful as ever. However.


    Carynne could not say anything.


    And Raymond did not say anything either.


    There was once a time, during the first few years of her repeated life, that Carynne had spoken to him about the terror of death. <i>Im afraid of dying. Im afraid you wont remember me again.</i> But he smiled and stroked Carynnes head. <i>Ille to you again. Then, lets make a code. I dont know how Ill ever remember, but Im certain</i>


    She would never forget, but he never remembered even once. He was the one who said that they should make a code, but it was like a farce of sor.


    Raymond was a rational person. He never truly believed what she had said. That iteration, too. Until the very end, he did not believe Carynne.


    Even so, he had bet everything.


    This was the reason hes Carynnes male lead. Carynne had told Dun about this without hesitation. How would she be able to deny a man who did his best, even when he had no trust in her? Even if she could not love him, he was a man who did his best for her. Who else would she choose?


    Shall we make a code?


    <i></i>


    No. Theres no need for that kind of thing.


    Raymond stepped forward, closer to Carynne. He ced a hand on Carynnes shoulder. Carynne looked up at Raymond.


    For the first time, Carynne looked at him properly.


    Raymond was crying.


    Carynne was aware that she was truly holding him with her own hand. Raymond opened and closed his lips a few times, but eventually, he drew her into an embrace without saying anything. She felt her shoulder getting soaked by the second. Raymonds hands were shaking.


    She had always been curious about what his crying face would look like. Throughout all the years she knew him, she had only ever seen his smile, his wrath, his surprise. But never his tears.


    Carynne vaguely thought that, if he ever cried, he would only quietly shed tears. But that wasnt the case. Raymond was not crying quietly and gracefully.


    What left through his lips were akin to the pained howls of a beast. And Carynne noticed a simr sounding from her own throat. She felt suffocated.


    How did he know? How much did he remember? Who was he now? Why here, and why now?


    But Carynne forgot all of those questions swirling through her mind. She ced her arms around Raymond, who was embracing her. They embraced each other so tightly that their bodies might break.


    No words were needed. The dizzying sadness and emotion permeated through their bodies like the sh of a de.


    There was no need for a code. There was no need for any probing. There was no need for a confirmation. Love was not a test. Time could not be hidden by anything.


    There was no need even fornguage. No words at all were needed right now. One nce was enough to know. Only tears existed in this moment.


    Now, in this world made of ink, there existed two human beings. <ul ss="abh_tabs"> <li>Author</li><li>Recent Posts</li><section ss="vcard author abh_about_tab abh_tab" itemscope itemprop="author" itemtype="http://schema.org/Person"><a href = /trantor/yonnee" ss="url" target = "_nk" title = "yonnee" rel="nofollow" > <img /wp-content/uploads/gravatar/c43puniweaardlc-2.jpeg?w=250&ssl=1" ss="photo" alt="yonnee" data-recalc-dims="1" /></a > yonneeTrantor </section><section ss="abh_posts_tab abh_tab" ><img /wp-content/uploads/gravatar/c43puniweaardlc-2.jpeg?w=250&ssl=1" ss="photo" alt="yonnee" data-recalc-dims="1" /> Latest posts by yonnee (see all)<ul></ul> </section>

 Chapter 157 | 02. The lady & the gentleman

    Chapter 157 | 02. Thedy & the gentleman


    Raymond went on to blurt out many different things that didnt make sense, so filled with emotions. With tears trickling down as though time had stopped, so tired that he couldnt even stand anymore, Raymond raised his head to look at Carynnes face. Still, he was hugging her tightly with one arm.


    Using his other hand, he reached up and caressed her cheek. And with a hoarse voice, he spoke.


    Carynne, first, we need to move. We cant stay here for long.


    Yes, okay.


    As Carynne nodded, Raymond hoisted her up and carried her in his arms. He nced out the window once, but soon turned away and headed for the stairs.


    Its better to descend slowly.


    Youre stating the obvious.


    Carynne thought about the consequences of plummeting down with such speedst time. It hurt like <i>hell.</i> It wasnt even an instantaneous death. Although she had died soon after, Carynne still trembled at the recollection of how every single bone in her body had shattered.


    Even for someone like her, who was much ustomed to death, pain was still something she couldnt get used to.


    Carynne. Carynne?


    Yes.


    Are you alright?


    But right now, Raymond was holding her. Carynne blinked. Shes fine. Right now, theres someone who remembers her, even after she has died.


    She looked at the man who was holding her in his arms. This man, who knows herwho loves her and understands her.


    The only one in the world.


    Sir Raymond. Theres something Ive been wishing I could do.


    Go ahead, whatever it is.


    Can I pinch you whenever you make a boring joke?


    Were my jokes so boring?


    He sounded a bit taken aback. She replied firmly.


    Yes.


    Ill try harder.


    Yes, please do so.


    Carynneughed, but somehow, her throat was closing up. Raymond was carrying her in his arms, but it felt like she was much too high up.


    Um, I can walk.


    Cant I just carry you all the way down?


    Its not like youre not allowed, but


    She thought it might be better for her to walk on her own two feet. While in his embrace, Carynne felt the vibrations of his every step while walking down the spiral staircase. Carynne didnt say anything more.


    Though Raymond was smiling, his eyes were contrastingly reddened and swollen. She decided just to let him carry her. He looked eager to do so anyway.


    Ive always wanted to do this.


    Raymond hugged her tighter as he said this.


    With you, alive.


    The sound of his footsteps continued. But it didntst long. It didnt seem like the case when going up, but time seemed to pass by faster when going down together.


    The walls around the spiral staircase conveyed only darkness, and going around and around was a little dizzying, but none of that mattered right now.


    It was only at the end of the staircase that Raymond opened his lips to speak again. He sounded slightly hesitant.


    Carynne.


    Yes.


    I think it would be better for you to close your eyes.


    Why?


    Carynne turned her head. There wafted a distinctly metallic scent. She knew instantly what he meant by those words, given the bloodstains on the walls.


    It was impossible for Raymond to have negotiated diplomatically in the first ce. The smell of blood was overwhelming.


    Raymond gently pulled Carynnes head close to his chest.


    Im sorry.


    However, his apology wasnt directed towards those who had been init was for Carynne. <i>Im sorry for the smell. It must be bothering you.</i> Just that.


    The distinct stench was everywhere. All the people here were dead. Among them must be the duke or the child. It would have been natural for her to ask, <i>How could you kill a child?</i> But really, did she have the right to say that?


    No.


    Burrowing deeper into Raymonds embrace, Carynne replied.


    Its fine.


    Raymond was always on her side. And vice versa for Carynne. Right now, Carynne no longer had to think about how Raymond would react to different scenarios that mighte. Whatever it was that shed do, he would understand her. Whatever it was that hed do, she, too, would understand him.


    In all honesty, Carynne was far more sinful than Raymond. She was the one who had killed for her own pleasure. Raymond knew that as well. Nevertheless, here he was, apologizing to her about killing people because the smell was upsetting her.


    Here and now, Carynne needed only one thing.


    She closed her eyes. This was her courtesy to him.


    As Carynne was still nestled in his arms, Raymond walked past the dead bodies strewn on the ground.


    She could hear the blood sshing indistinctly beneath his shoes.


    Im fine.


    Her knight was not going to be the same as he was before. Something must have drastically changed because of her. The Raymond who couldnt remember anything about the past couldnt possibly be the same as the current Raymond who had retained his memories.


    But whoever he was, Carynne couldnt help but love Raymond. The more he sacrificed for her sake, the more she loved him.


    Raymond lowered Carynne to the ground in front of the waiting horse. Actually, theres something thats been bothering her since they were going down the stairs.


    Here. Theres something on your cheek.


    Thank you.


    When Carynne handed him a handkerchief, Raymond took it and roughly wiped his cheek. What had been bothering her were those faint smudges on his face.


    Hold on.


    Carynne reached up and wiped Raymonds cheek once more with her fingers. At this, Raymond closed his eyes and epted her touch. It was no big deal, yet for some reason, the sensation was stark. Carynne took back her hand immediately.


    Right now, even just looking at him felt a bit strange.


    Did I get some on my face, too? she asked.


    No, theres nothing. Well be traveling on horseback, not by carriage. Are you feeling well enough for it?


    Carynne looked down at her ankle and waist. There didnt seem to be any problems.


    Im alright, but where are we going?


    To my house.


    Wow.


    Raymonds home was by no means perfect, but it was pretty nice. Its exactly what youd expect a barons historic mansion would be like.


    Although it wasnt as extravagant as the pce, it was at least more splendid than the guest house that the countess had offered to her before. And most of all, Raymond was perfect in the way that he did not impose any sanctions on Carynnes expenditure.


    The days spent in that house were filled with peace and tranquility. Until now, the period she was allowed to stay there had only been short, but this time, shed be able to enjoy her time there starting from spring.


    So, shes going to his house at this time of the year. So many changes hade to Carynne thus far, and it was nothing short of amazing. Of course, a miracle had happened, so it wasnt strange for this to ur as well.


    Go up first, Carynne.


    Raymond lifted her onto the saddle. She pulled herself forward, and he climbed on behind her.


    As they were seated together like that, Carynne asked.


    I wish to go on a trip. Cant we travel a little first?


    Carynne was a little disappointed that her ns had beenpletely thwarted. In this loop, she had been so set on going on a trip, one that she had never gone on before.


    Ah Im sorry, Carynne. Ill have to ask for your understanding first.


    Understanding for what?


    Lets reschedule that trip to next year.


    Whats the point of rescheduling that far with a life as short as mine?


    Just as she said, her life was truly short.


    I want to go see the ocean this summer. Cant I?


    She was a bit surprised to hear herself whining. Wow. Shes acting like a real kid. Carynne felt a little embarrassed as he soothed her gently.


    Carynne.


    While urging the horse forward, Raymond spoke with an affectionate tone.


    I would like it if you can stay at home for about a year. Its something that Id need your understanding for, but even if youre against it, I wont listen. And Ill have to think about contacting your family as well.


    Yes, my father must be worried.


    But Im afraid that youll go back and die while youre out of my sight.


    Well, even if Im in front of you, Ill still d Oh, dont cry. Gosh.


    Carynne looked behind her casually, but she had to stop herself mid-sentence because Raymond was about to cry again.


    People say that tears were every womans most powerful weapon, but its just the same with men as well.


    In any case, Ill have everything prepared this year. Please be patient for only one year. Lets go anywhere you want after that. Whether its the sea, the mountains, or even a foreign country. Wherever you want. But not before this one year ends.


    Good heavens, Sir Raymond. Dont you know that obsessive men arent popr? Are you perhaps thinking about locking me up in your room?

 Chapter 158

    Chapter 158


    Hearing what Carynne said, Raymond stiffened for a moment. And after a while, he stammered through his words.


    Its, well, um No I just first want to make sure that you wont die in a years time, so


    Im joking. You dont have to take it so seriously. I already guessed what you had in mind when you said it.


    Yes


    Carynne pinched Raymond on the back of his hand. His grip on the horses reins lurched, but he soon straightened himself up.


    Sir Raymond, you must have aged. I surmised that youd be no fun once you get older, but youve exceeded my expectations.


    Carynne, youre joking, right?


    Im serious this time.


    Ill hit you as a joke if you want. But anyway, even with your obsession, Sir Raymond, Ill let you off. Because youre handsome.


    The obsession that Raymond had was different from Crown Prince Gueuze. Rather than a dark dungeon, his was a greatly expansive greenhouse. It was not to monopolize, but to protect.


    Carynne knew the full extent of this mans love. And, of course, appearance matters in this equation.


    Its an honor.


    But I wont pardon the same thing once you get older.


    Itll be alright. Im still handsome even when I get old.


    Raymond answered, quite sure of himself. His conviction in that statement was borderline shameless.


    Wow Such confidence.


    Its true.


    Raymondughed. Carynne could feel hisughter behind her.


    Heughed for a long time, then he spoke again.


    And, I must ask you. Please dont take your own life again. My life span is too long, I dont think Ill be able to hold out any longer. All I could think about was how excruciating it would be to live for a long time once more if I waste this time again.


    What?


    Promises are meant to be kept. And it doesnt mean you can coerce someone else into ending your life either.


    Carynne thought to herself for a moment, then she understood what he was saying.


    After she had plummeted from the tower and died, she had ended her own life several times through Nancys or Borwens hands.


    It was just as Raymond said. Carynne deliberately tried not to think of him ever since she came back to life.


    But if she just hadnt acted hastily back then, she would have reunited with him sooner.


    Ah, that I think I died about five times I didnt know that you retained your memories, Sir Raymond


    Carynne trailed off.


    Until now, she was vaguely thinking that Raymond was the same Raymond she met at the age of 117. But after what he said just now


    Sir Raymond. How much do you remember?


    Carynne raised her head and looked at Raymond. His face was as beautiful as ever, and there was not a single sign of age on his skin.


    However, as soon as Carynne looked at him, she could recognize that the years had passed by for him.


    He was not the same man she met when she was 117.


    Raymond could remember not just one life.


    He was also speaking of his past self.


    How old was this man now?


    Raymond tightened his embrace around Carynne.


    Everything.


    While in his arms, Carynne saw Raymonds expression. It felt as if she was looking down from the edge of a huge cliff.


    A great deal of years had passed for him.


    I remember everything.


    Exhaustion was palpable in his voice.


    Right now, I dont want to think about anything else, other than loving you.


    * * *


    Carynne.


    Raymond stepped closer to her. His fiance. He knew. Its already toote. Shes dead. He saw that height. He heard the sound.


    <i>No, I dont know yet. I need to check.</i>


    Carynne.


    Raymond stepped closer to Carynne. He looked at the girl who he lovedwhat <i>seemed</i> to be the girl he loved. He ced two fingers on her neck. Theres a pulse. She was breathing.


    But it was much too faint.


    Everythings alright, Carynne.


    <i>It cant possibly be alright. Its already over. Shut up.</i>


    Take my hand. Carynne? Please keep your eyes open. Dont drift off to sleep. Can you move your eyes for me?


    Sir Raymond


    Behind him, Zion feebly called his name. Raymond turned his head to look at Zion, whose expression was disastrous.


    At the soldiers expression that seemed like he was consoling him, Raymond roared out with a bitter cry.


    Call a doctor! Shes not dead yet!


    However, a terrible sound slowly came from behind him. The sound of feet dragging on the ground. The sound of holy robes being dragged.


    That man. He was the only doctor in this ce. Raymond was ovee with the pressing urge to kill that man.


    However, there was something else that man needed to do before his death.


    Re Reverend Please Please


    I-I-Its Its already hopeless.


    <i>And theres only one thing that <strong>you</strong> can do for her.</i>


    * * *


    The forest was dark and wide. Carynne was sitting in front of Raymond. The horse wasnt running fast, but it still kept enough speed.


    Ack.


    Be careful.


    Yes.


    As Carynne wasnt very good at horseback riding, she focused on bncing herself on the horse. But as the speed gradually slowed down, she could afford to let her mind drift to other things.


    Sir Raymond, what are you thinking of doing from now on?


    I intend to be by your side from now on.


    The answer he gave was firm. But, little by little, Carynne couldnt help but be aware of their reality.


    Just as it was ufortable for her to ride a horse even if shed try, what you cant do just cant be done.


    I truthfully Well, realistically speaking. Isnt it impossible for you to keep being by my side, Sir Raymond?


    No matter how hard she thought about it, it was impossible. Even if Raymond would quit everything, he was not the king. And its impossible for him to be king. There was a ce where he belonged, and there were many people he was involved with. Even if he was living his life anew, it was just impossible.


    It was for the same reason that Carynne, too, never failed to be a maid in the Evans household several times, and she always entered high society at around the same time. Furthermore, Raymond was involved in many more things than Carynne.


    But, perhaps.


    Carynne thought about how Raymond had lived quite a long time. On her part, after she had lived for 117 years, there was nothing to do, so she started killing people. It didnt matter to her if shed be jailed and executed for her actions.


    Was Raymond of the same mindset now too?


    Was he acting recklessly and without a second thought now?


    Carynne gulped. If he hadmitted any crimes, this time, the one whod be on death row was going to be Raymond.


    By any chance, you didnt desert the military, did you?


    I did no such thing, Raymond answered immediately, then added. Once we go home, theylle for me, not you.


    But I havent done anything wrong in this life yet, have I? Carynne retorted with a smirk.


    Ah, thats true. Um, in any case, I didnt desert. I decided to use all of my vacation days since Im about to retire anyway. And my retirement will automatically be processed through paperwork.


    The exnation was more mundane and more anchored onmon sense than she previously thought. Carynne sighed slightly, perhaps because of a sense of relief.


    Thats possible?


    I filed for a leave thats as long as possible. Ill be fine for about three months. Ill have to do one thing throughout those three months, but its nothing big.


    Are you sure?


    Yes. I confirmed it twice.


    Confirmed how


    In my previous life. I dont think itll make a vast difference even if Im not there. Well, actually, its more of a hopeful guess.


    He added thest part a little pessimistically. But still, it sounded convincing enough.


    Was it because of hisck of confidence in that regard?


    Then, Id rather disappear from the social scene, too.


    Yes, thats possible as well.


    Are you being considerate towards me?


    Yes. Im sorry.


    No, youre doing great.


    Thats what she said, but it was actually hard for Carynne to take this in stride. She was holding back from asking too much, but it was better to ask him about the elephant in the room for the sake of their future and their rtionship.


    Carynne raised her head. She looked straight into Raymonds green eyes.


    Sir Raymond.


    Yes.


    How old are you right now?


    Raymond pondered for a moment before replying.


    I dont quite know. I didnt keep track.


    Carynne balked at his answer.


    By any chance Umm I, well, I lived for over a century And from when I fell from the tower, I was 117 years old, so I remember that I regressed 100 times.


    Yes, thats right.


    And since then, Ive died five more times in quick sessions.


    Yes. Please never do that again. I thought I waste again this time.


    Raymonds tone was gentle. However, Carynne was ovee by a sinking feeling.


    A huge number was vaguely encroaching on her mind.


    Sir Raymond I have to ask Did you go back to the past 100 times while remembering everything that happened in your repeated lives since then?

 Chapter 159

    Chapter 159


    Carynnes breathing stopped. Its not a number that should be associated with human life. Her own lifespan was just one year. If Raymond would live another seventy years after her, he would have had to live those seven decades 105 times over.


    That was more than seven millennia.


    Should he still be able to move and talk? Could a human being be able to endure that kind of life?


    Seven millennia was just short of an eternity.


    Carynne was frightened. Selfishly, rather than fearing the time that Raymond had endured, she feared the possibility that she herself might have to live through that period of time.


    Not to that extent.


    <i>Haa.</i> Thats a relief.


    Carynne let out a relieved sigh. She dreaded that great deal of years. Seven thousand years was too long.


    Much too long.


    But it was long enough.


    Raymond kissed Carynne on the forehead.


    As though he, too, felt a great amount of relief.


    * * *


    After Carynne Evans had died on death row, Raymond had thereafter been summoned by Marquis Penceir, who was about to be crowned king. The soldier thought that the iing monarch would be livid with him, or that hed be faced with a cold expression due to his bold defiance, told to die right then and there.


    Im assigning you your next mission. I wont ept any objections.


    Of course, Marquis Penceir.


    Theres not much time left before the coronation.


    Congrattions.


    Raymond answered calmly. While handing over the briefing documents to Raymond, Marquis Penceir asked.


    Are you alright?


    The implication of his question was clear. Raymond nodded.


    Yes.


    About the funeral. What should be done?


    A death-row convict cannot be granted a funeral.


    As Raymond answered, he carefully leafed through the documents detailing the targets that Marquis Penceir had tasked him to kill.


    Shouldnt you rest first?


    No, sir.


    As a matter of fact, he could not possibly be alright. However, the marquis wasnt truly sincere in his generosity, just that he was intoxicated by the role of a generous man. He didnt think that Raymond should rest.


    Right, since its like this, it would be better that you go straight to work. I think so as well.


    As the marquis said that, they both knew that his job was more than just killing people firsthand. But Raymond just bowed his head.


    <i>Im going to be fine.</i>


    I had known her for only a few months.


    Raymond replied repeatedly.


    Im fine.


    His own circumstances were not perfect. His seat on the parliament had beenpletely revoked, and Verdic was still on a roll.


    Laughably enough, Verdic was the only one who had lost nothing. Rather, he even gained more for himself.


    Soon after Carynne had fallen from the tower and died, Verdic approached Raymond, who was then the target of several soldiers guns.


    My daughter is dead.


    His words were grim, yet Verdic looked so refreshed. While looking down at Carynnes corpse, he continued.


    After everything that happened, it ended like this.


    Raymond looked up at Verdic. Would killing this man bring him peace? Would killing Dun bring him closure? Would killing <i>everyone</i> do anything?


    However, dozens upon dozens of soldiers had surrounded Raymond. If he were to move even a single inch, they would shoot. They all kept him at gunpoint.


    Raymond looked around, counting the number of guns around him.


    Its impossible. Its already hopeless.


    However, I am a generous man.


    Now that the convicted criminal has been executed, I find no problem anywhere.


    Verdic pressed down a finger on Raymonds shoulder. Raymond red at the wretched man, yet rather than flinch from his vicious gaze, Verdic gave Raymond a toothy grin.


    It is due to my grace and kindness that you will not die right here. Carry that shame with you as you live.


    After calcting it all, Verdic thought he made the right choice in doing nothing to Raymond. By killing Carynne, he achieved his purpose. He fulfilled his personal revenge, benefitted many things from the old king, and gained a moral justification to use against Marquis Penceir.


    He lost nothing throughout all this.


    Raymond lost money, but he was still alive.


    Alive.


    Carynne had died, yet he continued to live. He, who always had much work ahead of him. Time passed by in a blur. The new king needed him, and there was still work for him in this world.


    Raymond back at the corpse that once had been Carynne. He did not even deserve to recover her body.


    Its going to be alright.


    Thats what Marquis Penceir said.


    Time would be enough to solve all the joys and sorrows of the world. Raymond, too, knew this to be fact.


    His parents had died, his older brother had died, hisrades had died.


    However, the heart-rending pain never failed to disappear and dilute over the years. The dull pain would eventually subside, and a new life and new rtionships would begin anew.


    So, no matter how much sadness and despair gued him now, he would forget Carynne.


    Would he be able to?


    Raymond closed the door behind him and covered his nose with a towel.


    Ah, damn.


    His nose was bleeding. It would not stop.


    Raymond looked in the mirror. He washed his face. Cold water touched his skin and told him to return and face his reality.


    Once again, Raymond looked into the mirror.


    Im fine.


    He repeated those two words so many times that he had forgotten their meaning. Wasnt it inevitable that hed have to continue living?


    I will live well.


    But, could he truly?


    In the mirror, his eyes met with the gaze of a woman.


    <i>You will forget me, Sir Raymond.</i>


    I wish I could, Carynne.


    Carynne is dead.


    The girl he loved died. Even now, he wasntpletely sure whether he truly loved her. The time he spent with her was just so short.


    <i>Youre fine.</i>


    <i>Its just trauma.</i>


    <i>The grief brought upon by losing your beloved and letting her go is only just catching up to you.</i>


    This was how people consoled him.


    However, Raymond knew that it couldnt be. After having lost his family, his friends, hisrades, he was already well ustomed to grief and tragedy.


    Regardless of any kind of grief, he found it in himself the ability to stand back up again. Thats how ustomed he was to misery.


    <i>Look at that. I told you so, didnt I? Youll forget.</i>


    I dont know about that.


    Was it even possible?


    The most terrible thing that happened to him was not Carynnes death.


    It was what happened afterwards.


    Carynne.


    After she had passed away, unforgettable memories continued toe in droves upon his mind.


    Improbable memories.


    Carynne died.


    Carynne, dead.


    Carynne, hanged. Poisoned. Trampled on by horses. Strangled by men. Pushed down to the ground.


    Those cascading, never-ending memories began to weigh heavily on Raymond.


    This was the beginning of the curse.


    * * *


    Once upon a time, during a quaint day when shining lights sparkled and the pleasant sweetness of desserts filled the air, Carynne looked up at Raymond. Tension was visible in those wide purple eyes.


    Raymond waited to hear what she would say.


    Sir Raymond, I know this will sound strange, but I dont think Im from this world. I feel like this world is inside a novel. No, to tell you the truth I think we really <i>are</i> in a novel.


    It was an interesting story, yet nheless childish.


    Youre the male lead, and Im the female lead. If the two of us fall in love, there will be a happy ending.


    In that tale of hers, there was no input on the worlds societal structure, no consideration on how the lives of countless other people went on. However, as she spoke of that tale, he could feel the shyness in her confession.


    That alone was enough.


    Raymond took Carynnes hand.


    And I love you, so we must be having our happily ever after now.


    Then, he suddenly thought. <i>Does Carynne love me?</i> But, no matter. It was of no great concern to him. They had a lot of time ahead of thema lot of time to foster their love.


    Raymond brushed it aside, thinking that Carynne might just be having wedding jitters.


    Yet, the very next day


    Carynne died.

 Chapter 160

    Chapter 160


    Once upon a time, the wind was bleak as it grazed upon their bodies. Ise Evans pped Carynne on the cheek and cussed at her, and the rest was history. Even that small thing did not go past inventory in the revenge reached by Raymonds hands. Today was the day that Verdic Evans wentpletely bankrupt, and Raymond won.


    Countless people congratted Raymond and told him that they would attend his wedding. This would add to his honor and glory, they said. Raymond leaned forward and kissed his beautiful fiance.


    Carynne looked up at Raymond. Raymond looked down at Carynne. Her wide purple eyes were full of fear. Raymond wrapped his arms around Carynnes shoulders and soothed her.


    There is nothing for you to be afraid of. Verdic has now lost all of his power.


    It was more than what Raymond had expected. One of Verdics main businesses had gonepletely bankrupt. Raymond concentrated on one part of Carynnes story, which was quite the spection.


    Sir Raymond, I


    You helped me, and I will be with you for the rest of my life.


    I am afraid. I dont think Im from this world. I know it sounds incredibly strange, but this is not my first life. It truly feels like a world inside a novel.


    Unlike all the realistic and sound advice that she had given him before, this dreamlike story flowed from her lips. Now that he thought about it, the marquis once talked about Carynnes mother. She lived in a dream, he said.


    However, Raymond was willing to respect Carynne and her dreams. He would make sure that she could keep dreaming.


    Even if reality was cold and bleak, as long as this beautiful girl, who herself was like a dream, could continue to be immersed in her fantasies, everything would be alright.


    However, Raymond recognized that the emotion behind Carynnes eyes was a little too drenched in resignation.


    Still though, how could he believe what she was saying?


    Sir Raymond, I know that you dont believe me.


    Carynnes eyes seemed to be saying so.


    But what difference would his act of believing make?


    Then, the very next day, Carynne died.


    * * *


    Once upon a time, it was a fine spring day. Raymond had to find a suitable excuse to break off his engagement with Ise Evans. Couldnt there be a beautiful woman whod pass by right now? Grumbling inwardly, Raymond flipped through his notes. Really, he was so pathetic.


    Hello.


    Yes Good day to you, Your Ladyship. Are you feeling well?


    Im fine. You saved my life. Thank you.


    It is the right thing to do.


    Raymond nced down at the red-headed girl named Carynne Hare. She was a chubby, round girl. Raymond wanted to poke her plump, ball-like belly just once, but he had to push down the urge to do so. He was sure that shed hate that quite a bit.


    I thought it would be okay if I just gained weight.


    Carynne Hare sat next to him and spat out these words. Raymond pondered what to answer, but he soon remembered that Carynne had been in danger just now.


    During the festival, he came across the daughter of the fief lord, who was surrounded by hoodlums who clearly had ill-intentions toward her. He rescued her from them and that situation.


    They were about to r*pe Mmh. I apologize for the crude phrasing. Those men arent the type of people whod look only at outward appearances.


    Yeah, but I thought itd go differently at least. How disappointing, my life.


    Raymond heard here and there that Carynne Hare was quite a beauty when she was younger. Perhaps thats why she gained weight? Raymond recalled that Carynnes father was a fool for his daughter.


    I thought that getting bigger meant getting stronger. That no one could kill me anymore.


    I am a man and a soldier, but even Im scared to go into battle each time.


    But its not the same case for me. I cant even walk safely on these streets.


    I suppose so. It cant be helped.


    I guess.


    Really though, why was this woman talking to him at length? Was it because she hade to be infatuated with him? Raymond glimpsed sideways at Carynne.


    What is it?


    However, going by the expression that was on her face, what she felt for him was far from infatuation or any type of liking. Rather, she gave off the impression that she was secretly preparing for battle.


    Noticing his gaze, Carynne looked back at Raymond.


    No, well. I was trying to gauge whether you have a crush on me, Raymond spouted.


    I have no such intentions of doing that, so turn your gaze forward, if you please.


    Embarrassed, Raymond turned his gaze forward, just as she said.


    For some reason, his pride was wounded. With that childish pride, Raymond set down his notebook and turned to Carynne.


    But Im handsome.


    I know. And I told you to turn your gaze forward, didnt I?


    Do I need permission to take a look at what Im looking at?


    Yes.


    I see.


    And Raymond thought, of course, its rude to give people unwanted looks. As he agreed with her sentiments, Raymond turned his head again.


    Shes quite alright though.


    She was chubby, but her features still shined through, and her eyes were clear. What kind of face would Ise Evans make if he would say that hes going to marry this girl?


    She might be a good partner in life. Perhaps Ise would blow a fuse and everything would turn into a mess.


    My goal in life is to live for a long time. But why is that simple dream so hard to do?


    Umm Stay strong.


    You too, Sir Raymond.


    Carynnes eyes held within them firm resolution.


    The moment Raymond saw this, he knew that she would reject him if he were to propose. Raymond himself had the upational hazard of <i>not</i> living a long time.


    But why are you telling me about your lifes goal?


    Dont fall for me. And just in case, dont propose. Im here to tell you in advance because I have an inkling youre going to propose to me this time.


    Bearing witness to that confidence of hers, Raymond couldnt help butugh.


    She sounded ridiculous, but she was fun to be around. Thats why he felt even more that it was unfortunate. She would never be safe by Raymonds side.


    When ites to women, I only look at their faces. You dont quite fit my standards.


    Was she going to cry? Raymond nced sideways to see Carynnes reaction. With her head bowed, teeth gritted for a long time, she then got up from her seat.


    More than I thought Sir Raymond, youre that kind of person.


    Please take a look at yourself before saying that. You suddenly appeared here, and youre saying these things.


    Carynne stomped her foot once and spoke again.


    Lets agree to never see each other in this life, capiche? And once this is done, lets continue the same agreement.


    What are you talking about?


    However, Carynne was already stomping her way down the hill, huffing all the while. Raymond watched her retreating figure with a smile tugging up on his lips.


    Shes quite fascinating, though a bit entric. He wished she could live a long life.


    But then, this territory would soon fall into the hands of Verdic Evans.


    Raymond sat down again, sighing as he arranged his schedule. Even such a wacky rural girl would fall apart, be depressed andpletely miserable once Verdic would be part of her life. Just like Raymond.


    This was what he thought as he gazed upon the fief lords mansion in the distance.


    And then, Raymond was told that Carynne had died.


    She failed to fulfill her lifes goal.


    * * *


    Once upon a time, it was a stormy day. Raymond rescued a girl from a river.


    I really thought I could die this time.


    Its not your time to die yet, so strive to live longer.


    Raymond looked at Carynne Hares ashen face. She was the daughter of the fief lord.


    Please dont cry.


    God damn it Im alive again


    Carynne was crying, swearing as she did. It looked like she hated the fact that she was alive.


    Have I interfered with your suicide attempt?


    Yes. Then, can you help me?


    I dont feel inclined to do so.


    I knew youd say that.


    As Raymond refused, he wrapped a nket around Carynne Hare. He wanted her to live. For a long time. To be happy.


    My fianc is here.


    Still with the nket around her arms, she stood up. Now from a distance, Raymond stared at the girls retreating figure.


    Th-Thank you.


    Stuttering, the priest expressed his gratitude. Receiving his thanks, Raymond responded to the priest.


    Your fiance seems to be having a hard time, so pleasefort her.


    I-Its none of your business.


    Good grief. Raymondughed bitterly. The priest was looking at him with the same gaze hed see all the time amidst high societya gaze that was constantly keeping him in check.


    Those two werent a happy couple, but thats none of his business, just as he was told. If those two were just another ordinary couple, then what about himself and Ise.


    There were times when Raymond would nearly wish he could kill Ise. Just because her father was a criminal.


    Those two would live a good enough life together. Its none of his business. Even if Verdic was nning to take over this fiefdom and take away all their rights to it, that girl would be able to continue living with minimal food, clothing and shelter.


    However, the look in that girls eyesthe despair over the fact that she was alivecontinued to be ingrained in Raymonds mind for a long time.


    And, a yearter, Raymond was told that Carynne eventually seeded in dying.


    * * *


    Once upon a time.


    Carynne died,


    Right in front of his very eyes, falling


    to her death.


    Raymond ced a hand over her eyes and closed them.


    * * *


    Love, lust, sympathy, camaraderie, from feelings that tread the lines of friendship, to feelings that cross over to the lines of burning devotion.


    So many of those emotions started swirling.


    Emotions, too many to count, weighed down on Raymond.


    Weight that was equivalent to one hundred years.


    Raymond had to suffer from constant nosebleeds every morning, and insomnia every night.


    Carynne.


    Yet the owner of all those emotions was no longer in this world.


    Shes already dead.


    <i>Will I be able to die this time?</i>


    Raymond cocked his gun against his temple. The cold metal and the pressing weight gave him a sense of stability.


    Would he die and give himself repose? Would he be able to remember everything in the next life? All the memories that came back to Raymond were about Carynne. Not the next life. With uncertainty staring back at him, he could not possibly throw away the opportunities of today.


    Not now.


    One hundred years of pain was not enough to kill him right now. Raymond had too much work to do. If he wanted to find out anything more, he needed to live. Raymond <i>had</i> to live.


    It was a tragedy, and it was aedy.


    Raymond wanted to die because of Carynne, and Raymond wanted to live because of Carynne.

 Chapter 161

    Chapter 161


    Sir Raymond?


    Yes.


    I called you because you were so quiet.


    Sorry.


    Raymond apologized. Carynne felt like she could understand why Raymond sometimes got lost in thought like that. She experienced it herself, after all.


    Once you let down your guard for even a moment, memories would flood into your mind relentlessly, as though a dam had burst.


    Raymond said that he had lived longer than her. Considering his position and the older age he might have reached, its likely that he had varied choices and experiences.


    But that also meant that he lived far, far longer than her. With something like that, there was only one way to handle it.


    Focus on the present moment and do your best.


    Carynne ced a hand over Raymonds hand, which was holding the horses reins.


    Dont think.


    Yes.


    Her hand was warm.


    It felt real.


    Its nice to see this ce in spring, too.


    Itll be even better when the flowers start to bloom soon.


    Carynne looked at the stream, then raised her head to see the mansion beyond the meadow covered with green vines. The sound of water flowing under the arch bridge could be heard.


    Were almost there now.


    In the distance, the Tes Manor was visible. Carynne liked that mansion. Sitting on a slight slope, the Tes Manor was a historic and elegant building.


    I always onlye here in the fall or winter, so Im looking forward to spending the summer here. Is it okay to go out to the garden?


    She had never died in the garden before, so it would be too difficult for her if hed tell her not to go there.


    Yes, but when that day approaches, you should stay only inside the room.


    Carynne nodded in response to Raymonds words, then next, she asked.


    Okay. How about the rose garden? I heard thendscaping is nice, and Ive always wanted to see it myself. But every time I came, the roses were already withered.


    I hear its quite alright.


    Although it was his own house, it was a somewhatckluster and unsure answer. Carynne tilted her head to the side and asked.


    Youre not sure?


    I never had much interest in the rose garden except for when I was a child.


    Do you not like flowers?


    Its not that I dislike them, but Im usually at the capital or deployed for work, so thats how it is. And I usually buy flowers from the kids selling them rather than caring for the ones at home.


    Flowers grown from your own garden might be better than the ones just bought.


    I just do it as a form of charity for the poor. I enjoy the hypocrisy of giving alms.


    Dont undermine yourself. Direct charity can be a greatfort to them Ah, havent we had this conversation several times?


    Raymond chuckled.


    Yes, its a conversation weve had many times before.


    At the repetition of a simr conversation, they talked as if they had nned it together. It was a ridiculous thing to recognize. Raymondughed and then asked Carynne.


    By the way, was that rose garden really famous?


    Carynne hesitated for a moment before answering.


    Ise used to brag about it a lot.


    Raymond, too, stayed silent for a moment before responding.


    I see.


    The mismatched conversation ended somewhat awkwardly. Carynne then nced at Raymond for a moment. Raymond was focused on handling the horse, and the horses pace quickened slightly.


    She wondered what happened to Ise.


    Carynne waited for Raymond to say something else, but he remained silent.


    So, even when she was curious, Carynne didnt probe further.


    Ise was an important person in Carynnes life, and also in Raymonds life. She had always been there by their side, along with Verdic. Those two were the people who urged Carynne and Raymond to meet and have their beginnings.


    Even if Raymond had married someone other than Ise, the fact that Ise would appear never changed. But this time, she didnte. She disappeared. Even her father, Verdic, didnt know where his daughter was.


    Raymond, what have you done to Ise?


    The fact that Raymond was keeping silent about Ise made Carynne suspect that he had done something. But she didnt ask him further. If there was a need to talk, she would do so at the right time. It would not be polite to ask further right now.


    Is Emily in the mansion now?


    Carynne changed the topic. Emily was Raymonds elderly housemaid. Raymond asked in a puzzled voice.


    No, shes not. Why do you ask?


    She was teaching me the embroidery method from her hometownst time, but we got interrupted. I was wondering if I could learn it this time.


    Carynne thought about what she would do from now on. She remembered that in one of her past lives, she had struggled to master embroidery, pricking her fingers multiple times but still getting it wrong. Perhaps this time, shed be able to perfect it.


    Im sorry. I fired all the staff to keep you from meeting other people as much as possible.


    I see.


    If you want, Ill make certain preparations.


    In response to Carynnes somewhat sulky answer, Raymond made a suggestion.


    With Emily?


    Ill have her teach <i>me</i> embroidery, Raymond replied.


    Hearing Raymonds serious proposition, Carynne nodded in response.


    Now thats a funny joke.


    I didnt mean it to be a joke, but


    Raymond responded still with a serious expression, but Carynne couldnt help butugh when she imagined him diligently embroidering with a stern face.


    Anyway, I need to think about what to do. What would be fun to do in the mansion?


    Carynne liked this mansion.


    In terms of size, it was not inferior to the royal familys vi, and above all, the scenery was beautiful. There was a mountain behind the building, which made the mansion shine even more, and a shallow stream ran in front of the beige-colored mansion, perfect for leisurely ying in the water.


    Carynne especially enjoyed lying in the vast meadow that stretched out in front of the mansion, basking in the sun.


    The garden had various beautiful trees pruned diligently by gardeners, and in the summer, many nobles would visit. Peacocks and swans roamed the garden, and the rose garden was Carynnes favorite ce.


    Its been a long time since Ive been here.


    Surely one of the reasons Verdic Evans coveted the Saytes family was the grandeur of the Tes Mansion.


    Verdic Evans also had several mansions, but owning a mansion like this was another matter.


    A noblemans mansion was not just a single building; it included the entire estate that had been managed and upied for decades or even centuries. It epassed everything from gardens to historic buildings, hunting grounds, and the ssical decorations within.


    Verdic might have owned elegant and splendid buildings, but that alone might not have satisfied himas was the case with most wealthy individuals.


    Carynne, take my hand ande down.


    Carynne took Raymonds arm and descended from the carriage. Her back hurt. Carynne stretched a little then looked up at the mansion. The mansion revealed its grandeur under the bright noon sun.


    Carynne walked slowly beside Raymond. It was a ce she had been to many times, but the thrill was always new.


    Come to think of it, the rose garden seems a bit dangerous, Raymond said.


    Why?


    What if you get pricked by a rose thorn and get tetanus?


    Sir Raymond, be serious.


    Carynne yfully pinched Raymond, but his face remained stoic.


    Im always serious.


    Anyway, Ill stay inside the mansion for now. The flowers havent bloomed yet anyway.


    Yes, Im sorry about that.


    No need to apologize when you already know the reason.


    If this mansion was any smaller, she might have said no. Carynne thought about the Hare manor. It was undoubtedly arge mansion whenpared tomoners homes, but living inside even that manor felt stuffy at times.


    However, staying at Raymonds mansion would be enjoyable for at least a year. The mansion had over one hundred and seventy rooms spread across four floors. Each area was so spacious that it was difficult to feel cramped.


    Carynne walked up to the front gate.


    However, despite her using the lion-shaped door knocker several times, the door remained closed. Raymond walked up to her from behind and took out arge key.


    Since we dont have any servants right now, Ill have to open it myself.

 Chapter 162

    Chapter 162


    Raymond opened the door. It creaked open slowly. He must have really reduced the staff here. Carynne nodded and entered the mansion.


    <i>Huu.</i>


    It had been so long since shest visited. Carynne looked up at the chandelier in the hallway, ovee with nostalgia. Was it entirely made of crystal?


    Hmm


    Something was off.


    There were no candles on the chandelier. Were they taken out because its too difficult to maintain the chandelier with less people now? But without the candles, it would be quite dark at night.


    Sir Raymond, over there.


    When she turned her head, it was even stranger.


    Carynne saw a broken window above the front entrance.


    Whats going on? The window above the front entrance had been broken, but why was it still like that?


    Carynne turned to Raymond.


    Raymond, theres a broken window up there.


    Oh, there was a strong storm a few days ago. It seems the window got damaged. Ill call in a repairman soon.


    And the chandeliers missing candles


    I had them removed because theres no need to maintain them. I can put them back if youd like.


    <i>Youre going to do it yourself, are you?</i>


    No way.


    Carynne fidgeted with her hands and looked at Raymonds face. She had to ask. She really had to.


    Raymond, you mentioned that you reduced the number of maids and servants, right?


    Yes.


    No way.


    Really, no way, right?


    Carynne tried to calm her racing heart and asked calmly.


    How many people are left in this mansion?


    Raymond blinked and casually replied.


    Two.


    No way, just two servants? Carynne felt that if what was standing in front of her was not this soldier but that worthless priest, she might have resorted to violence.


    No. Really. It couldnt be.


    Two servants?


    Ah I answered it wrong. There are none.


    Not a single one?


    Carynne felt like her hair was turning white. What exactly was this man saying now.


    However, Raymond continued to smile, as if he couldnt understand what Carynne was thinking.


    Yes. We are the only ones in the mansion. A carrier brings supplies once a week, so you dont have to worry about that.


    Calm down. Stay calm.


    Carynne steadied her trembling voice and asked again.


    For a mansion of this size, its typical to have around one hundred people living here permanently, right?


    Yes.


    Then, are you saying that we should maintain everything ourselves? Preparing meals, managing the estate, the gardens, and everything that those one hundred or so people used to do Just you and I, Sir Raymond?


    Raymond nodded.


    Yes. Theres plenty to do, so we wont get bored. Fortunately, Ive learned cooking and cleaning while I was serving in the military.


    Cooking <i>Military</i> cooking


    At Carynnes response, Raymond proudly nodded.


    My subordinates couldnt stop praising my cooking. They devoured everything I made.


    And cleaning What exactly do you mean by that?


    Carynne, you dont have to worry too much. I can handle it all. I can clean a hundred sets of military uniforms in a day <i>O-Ow!</i>


    Its supposed to be a joke.


    Carynne brought her index finger and thumb together, tightly. The corridor ahead was pitch ck.


    <i>Ouch,</i> why did you do that?


    Carynne pinched Raymonds side hard, but Raymond just looked at her with a puzzled expression, as if he couldnt understand.


    What a funny joke. Really, how entertaining.


    <i>Tell me its just a joke. Please.</i>


    But Raymond continued to be bewildered.


    If you need anything else, we can pay for it with money


    Thats not the problem. Carynne bit her lip.


    Do you want to die?


    Huh?


    Sir Raymond. Wanna die?


    Carynne clenched her fists, her frustration evident, but Raymond tried to calm her and pleaded with her.


    I wont lift a single finger.


    Yes. I will take care of everything.


    Raymond replied without much difort. This only made Carynne more anxious. She had hoped Raymond would say he would hire more servants again, not that he would personally handle everything.


    Really?


    Yes.


    In Carynnes perspective, it was simply unrealistic. She stared at Raymond with narrowed eyes and asked again.


    Youre serious about this? Youre sure you want to handle everything yourself?


    <i>Even if youd die doing it?</i>


    If you work and somehow die, wouldnt that defeat the purpose? Just rx and stayfortable, Raymond soothed.


    Could anyone really rx in this situation? Carynne had never been so uncertain while looking at Raymonds confident face.


    Rest in your room. Ill tidy up and go upstairs.


    Might as well give it a try. Carynne sighed and asked as she climbed the stairs,


    Which room should I use?


    There were far too many rooms in this mansion. Carynne pondered which one out of the one hundred and seventy rooms would be in the best condition. As Raymond headed towards the storage area, he replied.


    How about the one we used to share?


    The one on the third floor? Did you clean it up?


    Its clean Not by me, though.


    Then, I find that more trustworthy.


    As Carynne said this, Raymond waved a hand.


    Carynne, Im confident in this. Ill wake you up when our meal is ready, so just rest.


    <i>Whatever.</i>


    Grumbling under her breath, Carynne put up with his smirk and pped away Raymonds hand.


    * * *


    I dont know anymore Rx, he said.


    She sighed and made her way to her room, leaving Raymond to bring out adder and arrange the candles on the chandelier one by one. Carynne knew hed have to extinguish them all before going to sleepter, too. It was just so tedious.


    Do whatever you want.


    She muttered to herself as she settled into her room. She didnt even feel like telling Raymond not to do it. It wasnt an easy task, yet Raymond seemed determined.


    With her experience of overseeing Ises chambers before, Carynne knew that managing a mansion of this scale was nearly impossible for just one person.


    From opening all the doors and windows in the morning and closing them again at night, changing the broken windows and changing the beddings every day, there were so many tasks that needed ones personal attention andbor.


    Carynnes family manor alone was just about a quarter of this mansion, but the Hare family at least had more than twenty maids. Other than them, there were attendants, coachmen and cooks. There were over fifty employees in total.


    Raymond must not be aware of it because hed been entrusting most of the internal affairs of the mansion to the butlers or housekeepers. Carynne shook her head. <i>Men.</i>


    Carynne predicted that Raymond would likely raise the white g within a month. Even if he was physically capable, this was a battlefield of a different kind. Carynne excelled in social circles and dancing, not household tasks. Thats the battlefield theyre facing now.


    Even if Carynne had taken care of Ises chambers, it wasnt something she had done entirely on her own. Her responsibilities were limited. Carynne knew that personally managing a mansion of this size, even for a brief period, was an impossible task.


    Raymonds unwavering confidence in himself astounded her.

 Chapter 163

    Chapter 163


    Its still clean.


    Carynne climbed the stairs.


    Despite the servants leaving, or rather, being forcibly dismissed, it seemed they had tidied up in their own way. Carynne thought back to her time at Ises house.


    I remember I used to hide plenty of tar under the carpet. Wasnt this only normal?


    She may have been a naughty maid, but Raymonds servants had evidently done their best right to the end.


    Such a shame.


    ces with overall skilled servants like those in this mansion were exceedingly rare. Carynne was on the verge of tears at the thought that her much-anticipated rxing vacation was slipping away.


    <i>Creak.</i>


    Carynne opened the door to the room she had shared with Raymond in the past. The door was not locked.


    Haa. I knew it would be like this.


    There was a draft inside.


    Carynne sighed as she saw the open window. The white curtains on the window fluttered, weing Carynne as they waved.


    He said that a storm had passed. Was this window open back then? Carynne approached the window and tied the curtains. A few twigs and some early spring petals had blown into the room.


    A soft, rosy petal touched her face.


    Carynne plucked the petal away.


    The dazzling afternoon sun greeted Carynne.


    Carynne gazed out of the window at the garden below.


    It was still a beautiful and peaceful mansion.


    This was the ce that she could have had when she chose Raymond.


    A vast meadow and asional herds of grazing sheep could be seen in the distance. There was a stream near the mansion, and it was nice to read a book on the wooden raft there and fall asleep.


    Across the bridge over the stream, there was a fountain. It hadnt started flowing yet, but in the summer, water would surely spout from there. In the rose garden, beautiful roses would bloom, and below the arched walkway made of wisteria, a lc-colored promenade would shine.


    The gardeners must have all been dismissed, too. Itll be chaos in the summer


    Carynne couldnt imagine how messy the garden would be without proper care. The romantic image of the mansion was shattered. She vowed to make sure that the gardeners would return.


    We definitely need to hire a cook.


    Carynne had zero expectations for Raymonds cooking. The more she thought about it, the more her head hurt.


    She shook her head. She hadined enough, so it was time to rest. She was tired from the unfamiliar experience of horseback riding.


    She turned towards the rooms interior.


    Therge bed could easily amodate six people.


    Shey down on the bed. With a sigh, she sank into it. The bed was soft andrge. Instead of a mattress with springs inside, she only felt the softness of the bedding.


    Carynne buried her face in the pillow and kicked her shoes off onto the floor.


    Raymond said he would take care of it, so he would.


    Rest was what she needed.


    She closed her eyes. The pillow smelled faintly of flowers.


    The scent of peace.


    * * *


    <em>Carynne, what about dinner</em>


    Raymond woke her up a couple of times, but each time, she gestured for him to leave. It had been a long time since she had slept peacefully.


    * * *


    Mmh.


    When she finally opened her eyes, it was midnight.


    She had slept for too long.


    Carynne was momentarily disoriented upon waking up. She had slept for too long, making it difficult to grasp the situation. A headache surged from her extended slumber.


    Haa.


    This time again, her dream was a nightmare. Carynne had died again in the dream. No, it wasnt just dyingshe had dreamed of being drowned while still alive.


    She couldnt do anything as water slowly filled the coffin, where she felt the water rising from her toes as she sank endlessly beneath the sea.


    She got up and wiped the sweat from her forehead.


    Carynne sensed a persons presence and turned her gaze. She momentarily tensed up, but it was Raymond. She sighed in relief as she looked at Raymonds golden hair and the body below it.


    There was nothing to fear. Raymond was with her. Raymond remembered her. He was the one and only person who would step into the coffin and be buried with Carynne.


    The fear of death never disappeared, but there was warmth in waking up from a nightmare.


    However, that was that, and Carynne shook Raymonds shoulder.


    Sir Raymond.


    Raymond.


    Yes.


    Raymond barely managed to answer. His voice was mired with drowsiness, but Carynne didnt stop shaking him.


    How can you get into bed without changing? Get up, change your clothes first, and then go to sleep.


    Raymond frowned, then turned his body towards Carynne. However, his eyes remained closed.


    My clothes are really dirty right now.


    No matter how much she pinched him, he didnt get up.


    Raymond opened his mouth in a voice that was close to crying.


    Cant you just let me? I fell asleep just a little while ago


    No. Youre all dirty.


    If Raymond had been cleaning all day, Carynne could only imagine what was on his body.


    You lit all the candles You didnt even see them.


    She wanted to smack him. She shook Raymonds shoulder as he rambled in his sleep.


    I told you Im going to bed first. Raymond, at least change your clothes first before going back to sleep.


    Im so tired right now Just five minutes


    How about I sleep in another room?


    At Carynnes words, Raymonds eyes shot open.


    No. Dont go, Carynne.


    Then he tightly pulled her body towards him.


    Sleep next to me.


    Carynne grimaced as her face buried in Raymonds clothes, which were covered in dust.


    Then change your clothes already.


    Toote. The sheets are dirty now.


    With that, he closed his eyes tightly.


    Give me a pass for just one day I really couldnt sleep well for so long


    His whining voice was like a sulking childs, and he didnt finish his words.


    Haa.


    Carynne sighed and began unbuttoning Raymonds vest to help him change clothes.


    But she didnt seed.


    Ugh


    Raymond tightly pulled Carynne into his embrace. With her face buried in his chest, she eventually gave up on undressing him. He had said he would do theundry himself anyway.


    Grumbling, Carynne closed her eyes again. She already slept enough, however, she couldnt bring herself to move away from Raymond. In fact, she didnt want to. She just wanted toin a little.


    She turned her head slightly and tugged at Raymonds arm, urging him to move it.


    Still, there were some advantages to this situation. She could feel warmth all over her body. It was still just the early spring, and it was chilly.


    She listened to Raymonds breathing. She found it strange that both of them were lying on the same bedalive. It felt like they were lying together for the first time.


    If she were to be buried alive, she hoped it would be in this bed, not in a coffin.


    Even if her entire body turned cold from freezing water, she would probably wake up if she kept hearing breathing. This warmth would protect her from any fear.


    Carynne nestled further into Raymonds arms. If she were to die, she would rather sink into the bed with him than into a coffin.


    She didnt fear the dark or death as long as she had him. Raymonds body felt sturdy and safe.


    Hes her sanctuary.


    Did Raymond suffer from insomnia too? Did he stay awake all night waiting for death, just like Carynne?


    It didnt take long for her to fall asleep again.

 Chapter 164

    Chapter 164


    Raymonds handling of the mansion wasnt exactly smooth, but it wasnt the worst either. Since the two of them werent using most of the mansion, there wasnt much to take care of.


    The servants quarters were mostly empty, and there were no guests, so he only needed to tidy up the areas that they regrly used. However, the luxury of their life had significantly declinedpared to before.


    The first problem was clothing.


    Im truly sorry, Carynne.


    Carynne knew she just had to ept Raymonds apology, but when she saw the pile of fabric in front of her, she couldnt say a word.


    It was her best dress, the one she usually wore when she first met Raymond, a dress withyers of frills underneath. It wasnt just about its appearanceit was lightweight and provided good instion, so it was one of Carynnes favorite dresses.


    However, she would never wear this skirt again while she was alive.


    It had already turned into a pile of fabric that couldnt even be called clothing.


    How exactly did you wash it?


    Just like the other clothes I soaked it in soapy water and washed it.


    With your working clothes, Sir Raymond?


    Yes. Thats right.


    Carynne wasnt aundry maid, but she at least knew that you shouldnt wash clothes like this.


    Unlike work clothes, which could withstand tough treatment, delicate fabrics like womens dresses should be handled with care.


    Most clothes were only lightly cleaned and then disposed of when they got dirty because damaging delicate fabrics was usually irreversible.


    Did you wash it with the clothes you wear while working?


    Yes.


    Washing such a dress with working clothes in a makeshift washing area resulted in a terrible oue. The dress waspletely distorted, and the dull color of the work clothes water had seeped into it.


    Ill buy a new one soon.


    She had to say that its okay, that its not his fault.


    Not knowing something wasnt a mistake. He immediately acknowledged his mistake and promised to make amends. She should answer, Its fine, and move on.


    Carynne couldnt bring herself to answer so easily. If he was her attendant, she would have scolded him, and if it was Ise instead, she would have fired the servant right away.


    But the person in front of her was Raymond. Carynne opened her mouth, but no words came out.


    Im very sorry.


    Never mind.


    That was the best she could do.


    In the end, Carynne couldnt bring herself to say that it was okay. She understood it logically, but her emotions were still slighted.


    Loving Raymond and dealing with this situation were two separate matters.


    That night, Carynne turned her back to Raymond and fell asleep.


    Im sorry.


    I know, Raymond.


    Raymond remained silent.


    Carynne searched all one hundred and seventy rooms in the mansion, but she couldnt find any clothes that suited her taste. When the employees left, they took everything with them.


    Its okay


    Carynne reassured herself as she looked at herself in the mirror wearing the in and ck attire of amon maid. She wasnt wearing an apron over it, but the rough fabric remained the same.


    Carynne felt a creeping, ominous foreboding.


    The second problem was more serious.


    It was about their meals.


    Carynne loved delicious food. She much preferred gourmet food and appreciated the pleasures of gastronomy. One of Raymonds greatest charms was his house, the Tes Mansion, which had in it its kitchen staff.


    They worked wonders with the grains and livestock from the rich, fertile soil of this territory. Their skills were superb, but the ingredients were of such high quality in this region that Carynne hade to adore thisnd itself.


    The grand dining hall could amodate dozens of people, but now, it was a space reserved for Carynne and Raymond alone.


    The dazzling sunlight streaming in from therge windows enveloped the entire dining area warmly, and dining together alone at the long andrge table had its own charm.


    Furthermore, the person sitting in front of her was someone with whom she could share a mealfortably regardless of the conversation. That was an essential condition for a delightful mealtime.


    However, Carynne couldnt bring herself to pick up her fork and knife.


    Does it not suit your taste?


    No, its fine. Thank you for your hard work.


    Carynne answered quietly as she silently sliced her meat. The tes pleased her. The tes, made of cast iron, and the meat were maintaining just the right temperature. It was hot, but the meats doneness was perfect.


    As she cut through the meat with a satisfying sound, the red center revealed itself, cooked to perfection.


    Im d.


    Carynne cut a piece and put it into her mouth. It had been cooked with a youngmb.


    In truth, it could hardly be called cooking. It was simply boiled and seasoned with salt and pepper. But the meats quality was so good that there was no hint of gaminess, and it was tender.


    It might be a simple preparation, but it was still enjoyable


    It tastes good.


    If only it hadnt been served for breakfast.


    But, Sir Raymond, Im worried that youre working too hard. You dont have to go this far from now on.


    Carynne rarely ate breakfast. If she did, it was usually just milk or tea, and a few snacks to tide her over. She wasnt an exceptional case with this, and most of the breakfasts served in noble mansions were quite simple, even for the servants.


    Its okay. My satisfactiones from seeing you enjoy your meal.


    How touching.


    Raymonds offerings consisted solely of meat, meat, and more meat. Even then, it was simply boiled, roasted, or poached meat.


    Carynne found it rather grim that the only side dish that apanied the meat was baked potatoes at best. This made her feel like she was in a monastery rather than a grand mansion.


    Sir Raymond.


    Yes, Carynne.


    Do you usually have meals like this in the military?


    Usually, its much worse than this.


    Its delicious. I appreciate it.


    Thats not what she was actually getting at. Sighing quietly, she continued to cut the meat.


    When Carynne didnt respond, Raymond suggested again.


    I had to prepare everything in a hurry, so all we had for bread was some stale baguette. I thought it would be better to focus on the meat instead.


    Dont we have any flour?


    Raymond stiffened at Carynnes question.


    Ill make sure to learn how to bake soon.


    So he had some more ingredients, but he couldnt make anything else.


    Carynne looked at the meat without looking at Raymond.


    Raymond himself was a nobleman, so he must know what ordinary meals for the aristocracy were like. However, since he wasnt in a position to entertain others on a regr basis, he was putting forth his best efforts based on his own standards.


    <i>Why dont you just call the chefs back in?</i>


    Carynne bit back the words that were right at the tip of her tongue. She stared hard at Raymond without speaking.


    Next time, Ill have the porter bring biscuits and bread.


    But the porters arrival was still far off. Carynne felt disheartened at the thought of continuing to eat such meager meals for a few more days.


    Please and thanks.


    Carynne forced a smile and replied to Raymond. Her smiling face seemed like it might twitch at any moment. But Raymond was the one making everything, cleaning everything, and even paying for everything, so it was hard toin.


    If theres anything you find ufortable, please tell me right away. Ill do my best.


    Carynne had to swallow the scream rising from her throat as she looked into Raymonds earnest gaze.


    It was a quiet meal in the ptial mansion.


    The third problem was that Raymond was too busy.


    Raymond forcefully made sure to spend at least two hours a day with Carynne, ying chess or having conversations while strolling in the garden. But anything beyond that was a stretch.


    Cleaning the house, preparing meals, spending time with Carynne, and handling the estates paperwork already filled his entire day. After dinner, he continued to receive and organize documents, send missives to different ces, and even more.


    I thought you retired?


    I didnt only handle military affairs.


    You had other duties, too?


    Yes.


    He gave a brief answer and then surprised himself by opening up a little more.


    I still have to oversee some matters rted to the Marquis.


    Living in seclusion within the mansion did not mean they had beenpletely disconnected from society. However, Carynne herself was detached from society, and Raymond was her only tether.


    Please, endure it for just one year.


    But for Carynne, that period felt like it would never end.

 Chapter 165

    Chapter 165


    Its not that I want to cause any trouble, but.


    She understood that Raymond was doing his best. How could she not? While she wasying in the meadow like this, Raymond was handling everything inside the mansion.


    But Carynne was dissatisfied. It was frustrating being in a position where she couldntin.


    Why am I still lonely?


    She had always been lonely. Until now, there was no one in the world who understood herno one who remembered her. But finally, she had someone who understood her and loved her, and yet her empty heart remained unfilled.


    Was it because of the unsatisfying meals? The simple clothes? It had to be those reasons. But Carynne found it challenging to admit her desires.


    Its peaceful but why


    Lying on the grass, she looked up at the mansion. Even though she and Raymond were alone in this vast space, Carynne kept feeling like her desires werent being fulfilled.


    Her desires were growing into greed, perhaps uncontrobly.


    <i>I want to be by your side. I want to spend more time together with you. I want us to talk about our future.</i>


    Once someone who understood her appeared, her desires seemed to grow endlessly. The world had felt like a text in a book to her, but now it felt like a realistic, enormous greenhouse. As reality began to sink in, her list of wants continued to expand.


    One year seemed longer than she had thought.


    Carynne, our meal is ready.


    The sun had already set. She must have taken another nap. Carynne looked at Raymond, who was sitting next to her.


    Her clothes were probably damp from the grass. Carynne nced at her attire. But soon, she realized that it didnt matter. All of her own clothes had been discarded, and she was now wearing a simple ck dress like a maid. It didnt matter if these got damp.


    Carynne continued to lie down and asked Raymond,


    Is it another greasy meal?


    Just eggs, no meat this time.


    Are we eating boiled eggs?


    No, omelettes.


    Wow.


    Carynne was pleased. Omelettes would be quite nice. Its enjoyable to see potatoes and diced bacon flowing out from a golden omelette when you cut into it. Those ingredients should be readily avable here.


    Fortunately, Carynne was content with the fact that she was finally having a proper meal without meat.


    Ill make various dishes for you next time.


    Okay.


    Carynney on the grass and looked up at Raymond.


    Raymond held Carynnes hand.


    She needed to make an effort, too. Raymond was working so hard, so she should, too.


    Raymonds hair fluttered in the wind. Thanks to the sunsets light, Raymonds hair had a fiery glow. Carynne liked that it was a color simr to her own. The spring breeze swept her cheeks.


    Carynne stretched out her arms.


    She wrapped them around Raymonds neck.


    Shall we go have our meal?


    Just a moment.


    Carynne pulled Raymonds neck closer.


    Ah.


    S-Sorry. I didnt mean to.


    Why did he have to be so strong at a time like this? She failed to pull Raymond in.


    Carynne instructed Raymond,


    Rx your muscles.


    This time he rxed his tense muscles too much, and their noses bumped into each other. It was strange how their noses seemed to be in the way.


    They bothughed, and slowly, their lips met.


    And that was how another day passed.


    * * *


    Carynne still knew that something was missing. She understood that effort alone wouldnt solve the issue.


    Significant desire and significant dissatisfaction.


    Human desire. Human sin.


    Pride, gluttony, greed, sloth.


    Most of Carynnes desires remained unfulfilled. She was undoubtedly staying in a splendid mansion, surrounded by a breathtakingndscapeand with the one person who understood her. Theplete peace that she had not experienced in a hundred years was right here.


    But it was not enough.


    Carynne knew of the extreme pleasures once could feel, and she knew of the desires that could reach even higher. She was aware of the joys of conversing with people in society, the pleasure of being praised, and the indulgence that came from savoring food, not as sustenance, but for enjoyment.


    Up until now, Carynnes only sin had been sloth. But even that did not suit her. She had worked diligently for far too long and had tried to give up, but even giving up felt like a challenge. She had tried to die in any way possible and to kill herself, too.


    She had lived a life where her very existence was at stake for more than a hundred years.


    This current life was far too dull for her.


    This was not a world inside a novel. This was reality. The two of them were here. Theyre together.


    As that thought crossed her mind, one year felt like an impossibly long, drawn-out time. Little by little, Carynne began to feel restless.


    And there was another issue that caused anxiety in her.


    Why isnt he doing it?


    Carynne sat on the bed with a pillow in her arms. She couldnt understand.


    Why?


    Raymond was her lover. In this life, he might not have proposed, but he was her husband. They were the only ones who truly understood each other. His affection for her was beyond doubt. It oozed from his eyes, his gestures, and every word he spoke.


    Thats why Carynne was even more confused.


    Why isnt he doing it?


    Why wasnt Raymond taking her to bed, in another sense?


    Man and woman. Husband and wife.


    There were no issues with affection.


    There were no issues with their health.


    There was no one else aroundjust the two of them.


    Isnt there only one thing that we <i>should</i> be doing?


    Carynne naturally thought that would be the case. They were a man and woman at the height of their youth, and further, Carynne and Raymond had already shared a bed on numerous asions in the past. Physical intimacy between herself and Raymond was not a distant fantasy from some old novels closing chapter.


    Carynne looked at the empty space beside her in the bed. Raymond had gone out again this morning.


    Just as he always did every morning.


    They were still sharing the bed, but contrary to her expectations, Raymond had never undressed her. They slept together quite literally. They were just sharing this bed for sleep.


    Sleeping next to someone elses breathing was peaceful, but as the days went by, it felt increasingly strange.


    The more she dwelled on the thought, the more she realized that there was utterly no reason for him not to engage in an intimate rtionship with her.


    <i>Griiit.</i>


    Carynne bit her nails. She was annoyed because she felt restless.


    She couldnt understand why she was feeling this way. Raymond had made proud derations that he would take care of everything, yet even the meals were just like before. The housekeeping, cleaning, andundry all felt devoid of enthusiasm.


    Most importantly, he wasnt staying close to Carynnes side. Carynne could only count the time they spent together throughout the day on one hand, and even when she tried to help him with tasks, he dissuaded her, as if it made him unhappy.


    Could it be?


    Carynne recalled one unpleasant possibility that she didnt want to consider.


    <i>Is he sick of me?</i>


    That cant be right?


    Even though they were a young man and woman, even though they were married, even though there was no issue with either of their affection or health


    Raymond wasnt doing anything.


    Age and physical exhaustion weremon reasons why intimacy dwindled in many couples lives.


    Even though Carynne and Raymond had youthful bodies, could it be that his desire for her had vanished when all the memories rushed back to him?


    This was not something she was expecting. Even if such a future were toe, it wasnt now.


    Her grip on the pillow tightened.


    Im not satisfied.


    Carynne was far from content with just holding hands and sleeping.


    If her restless feelings could be resolved through an intimate rtionship, thats all the more reason why she felt this way.

 Chapter 166

    Chapter 166


    Carynne opened the closet door. She had changed her clothes, but, as always, the attire didnt quite satisfy her.


    She wanted to wear something even a little pretty, but in the end, all she had were the simple ck dresses that the maids wore. She changed into the same-looking clothes every day and ate the same food.


    When would the new clothes arrive? Carynne didnt want to count the days in anticipation. Moreover, a few new clothes wouldnt be enough to satisfy her. When buying clothes, she had to personally touch and select hundreds of fabrics, decide on the garments style, choose which sewing line to use, and then have them tailored to fit her body.


    Though she was the daughter of just a countryside noble, Lord Hare, she still used to wear custom-made clothes from the seamstress. Carynne couldnt expect much from clothes that werent even measured to fit her body.


    Carynne closed the closet door and went in search of Raymond.


    She thought he might be in the dining room, but he wasnt there yet.


    Where could that man have gone


    Carynne passed through Raymonds study, but he wasnt there either. It was early in the morning. As she walked down the corridor towards the central staircase hall, she heard the sound of someone moving.


    It was Raymond. As sunlight streamed down the windows of the first to the fourth floor of the central hall, the illumination hit him just right. As always, he was working diligently. He always worked hard at everything.


    Except for one thing.


    Sir Raymond. Good morning.


    Upon Carynnes greeting, Raymond looked up and saw Carynne. His lips curved into a faint smile.


    Did you wake up just now? Please wait a moment. Breakfast hasnt been prepared yet.


    Why are you cleaning here?


    Because you pass through this hall every day. Wouldnt it be nice if it were clean?


    Do you clean it every day?


    Yes.


    Raymond was cleaning, as he always did, and everything was immactely neat.


    Carynne was disappointed that she couldnt wake up early enough to see what he looked like just after he got up from bed.


    Raymond rarely appeared disheveled, even when they had lived together before. Except for the first night they stayed here, when he overexerted himself from cleaning, Raymond always woke up earlier than Carynne and went to bedter.


    You dont have to work so hard.


    Im just doing whats necessary.


    Maybe he worked so much that his sexual desire had disappeared?


    Raymond took care of everything by himself including but not limited to: cleaning, feeding the remaining chickens and ducks, doing theundry, preparing their meals and even managing his own chastity.


    Carynne, who was unused to it all, eventually tried to help, but Raymond didnt even want her to move. He thought it was too dangerous for her.


    Yes. I will take care of everything.


    Was that a good thing?


    Men who do housework are the sexiest.


    She recalled how the maids used to enthusiastically exim about their ideal type in the past.


    Most of the male servants didnt try to do their best, and the mothers of the maids alsoined about the fact that women who retired from work at home never got a break and worked all day long.


    Thats why men like Raymond, who were willing to do housework themselves, were seen as the epitome of charm and consideration. A man such as him would be regarded as a man who would never be found again.


    But


    Was it really that charming for a person with enough wealth to dismiss all his servants and do everything himself? Wasnt he just creating more work for no reason?


    Carynne hoped that he would entrust all the tasks that could be done by hired help to other people and just spend more time with her in the present, rather than worrying about the uncertain future. It seemed like a waste not to use the money he had.


    Ill be done soon.


    She wasnt sure if this was sexy or not.


    Carynne observed Raymonds movements. His arms, revealed as he rolled up his sleeves, were well-built. His clothing was ordinary, but underneath, there was something out of the ordinary.


    She already knew how the muscles beneath those clothes moved.


    Even further down.


    <i>Flutter.</i>


    Carynne licked her lips with her tongue.


    Whats the matter, Carynne?


    Raymond, who was cleaning the floor, noticed Carynnes gaze and stopped. He usually continued whatever he was doing during their morning greetings, but he must have sensed that something was unusual with Carynnes demeanor.


    Why are you looking at me with such scary eyes


    Raymond asked Carynne in a nervous tone, a voice that seemed to suggest he had done something wrong. Of course, he had done many things wrong.


    Like the sin of neglecting his duties as a husband.


    Sir Raymond.


    Yes.


    Stop what you''re doing ande here.


    Raymond hesitated for a moment, then pushed the broom aside and approached Carynne. Carynne watched as he climbed the stairs.


    There was no sign of his steps faltering, and his exposed biceps were well-defined. Despite his simple attire, his bodys proportions and shape were perfect. He looked even better in his military uniform, but he also looked good even in these work clothes.


    Raymond now stood a few steps below Carynne, and looking up at her, he reached up with one hand to touch Carynnes cheek.


    Are you feeling ill? You dont seem to have a fever, but your face is red.


    Oh, yes. Theres heat, alright.


    Sleep with me.


    You woke upte today. It may sound like nagging, but you tend to sleep too much.


    Was he doing this on purpose?


    Carynne grabbed Raymond by the cor. Since he was a few steps below her, it wasnt difficult to grab him.


    Raymond looked bewildered as Carynne grabbed him like this. Carynne looked down at him and said,


    I cant stand it any longer.


    Ill try harder. The porter will arrive tomorrow. The things we need


    Carynne interrupted him and spoke again, looking Raymond in the eyes.


    I wont beat around the bush. Lets go to bed right now.


    Pardon?


    Raymond froze.


    Carynne briefly wondered if he just heard her say that he should drop dead, given the way his face had changed as if he couldnt believe what he heard.


    Raymonds face turned pale at first, then bright red.


    Even his ears turned a deep shade of crimson.


    Carynne We havent Were not even married yet


    Whats he saying now? Carynne looked at Raymond with disbelief.


    How many times do you think we should get married?


    Ah, um. Carynne, I mean


    Raymond stuttered without properly looking at her.


    Right now In this ce I know its just the two of us, but


    But?


    Its just, well. With your situation We shouldnt be too unrestrained. Theres still a lot of time left So for now


    Listening to all this, Carynne felt like she had be the most shameless woman in the world. It felt like all the strength in her body was being drained entirely.


    What could she possibly do about Raymond when hes being like this?


    Yes, yes


    Carynne?


    Carynne let go of her hand that was holding onto Raymond. Right. Once again, Carynne had to suppress her desires. Just like how one would abstain from indulgence, from gambling, or from an adventure.


    Fine.


    Thank you for understanding.


    For a moment, Carynne entertained the thought of hitting Raymond, but that thought soon disappeared as she instead grabbed Raymond by the cor again and kissed him.


    It was a kiss filled with frustration. She forcefully pressed her lips against Raymonds hard jawline and unyielding lips.


    And before parting from him, she bit Raymonds lower lip.


    I get it, so Ill leave first. You can endure the pain. Lets just say that I let off some steam.


    She backed away, but Raymond still seemed stunned. He nodded his head nkly, looking like he had lost his presence of mind.


    Yes


    Sir Raymond.


    Carynne spoke to him several times in session.


    Yes.


    Okay, I understand, so Ill leave first.


    Carynne let go of Raymond, but this time, he didnt release her. Carynne tried to pull away from his grip, but she couldnt.


    She endured his touch, irritated by his behavior. She didnt want to see his face any longer, honestly. But Raymond seemed to have many excuses, and he didnt let go.


    Sir Raymond?


    Raymond looked into Carynnes eyes, took several breaths, then grabbed her face and kissed her again. It was a rough movement, almost the opposite of what he had said earlier.


    The abrupt kiss left her breathless, and she pushed Raymonds shoulders away. She was angrier with his rushed actions than anything.


    What is this now?


    Carynne wanted to rebuke these actions that were in direct contradiction to his words, but she couldnt say anything more.


    Raymonds eyes were fixed on her with such intensity, his gaze so deep that it would send shivers down anyone who looked into them.


    Carynne.


    Raymond pulled Carynnes waist closer.


    <i>Carynne.</i>


    Raymond called her name again.


    There was no need for an answer.

 Chapter 167

    Chapter 167


    Carynne was regretting it.


    At the very least, nobody saw them doing it furiously in the hallway. The entire mansion was like their bedroom, after all.


    It started on the stairs in the hallway.


    And then, by the window.


    She had begged him to go to the bedroom several times, but it was a long time before he even heard her. She couldnt even calcte how much time had passed.


    Ugh


    It felt as if her entire body had been bruised. The reality wasnt any different.


    How much time passed?


    She stared nkly out the window. The sun was up, but she couldnt tell if it was twilight or daybreak.


    Her whole body felt sore and sticky. There were even some bruised areas.


    Sir Raymond.


    Carynne called out to him softly.


    He didnt get up. She looked at him. His eyes seemed swollen, and he was covering his eyes with one hand. His breathing seemed steady, and it seemed like he was still asleep.


    Raymonds body wasnt entirely unscathed either, but due to the significant difference in their physiques, the only marks left on his skin were a few nail scratches.


    His skin was so resilient that there were hardly any marks even when she bit his shoulder. She was amazed by his unblemished shoulders. Even though she was in so much pain herself. At most, he had a few nail marks on his back.


    Carynne looked at Raymond, who was sleeping heavily next to her, and wanted to take a shower. She wished hed let her go. His behavior was so extreme that it was hard to keep up with him. She didnt think he used to be like this.


    Its heavy


    His arm on top of her felt heavy.


    Raymond, please move your arm.


    Mm Okay


    She pushed his arm away, finding it too heavy to lift, but he still didnt open his eyes. He must have been exhausted as well.


    At least two days had passed, and during that time, they both couldnt leave the room, not even for meals. Apart from briefly tending to their bodily needs, they had been in bed for the entire time.


    Ugh


    She couldnt tell if she had fallen asleep or simply passed out from exhaustion. During this time, she couldnt eat properly. She had thought Raymond was busy with his work, which was why he spent so little time with her, but as the days passed, she desperately wished he would do something else.


    For a person to move, they needed to consume something for energy, but he had far more stamina than her, which meant he moved at different intervals.


    She began to fear that she might die of a heart attack at this rate. She had heard that if a man were to die while having sex, it was called dying on top, but could a woman die too? Dying underneath?


    Carynne contemted such thoughts and blinked. She had wanted to get out of bed for so long because of her stiff body. She was parched and wanted a sip of water from the canister someone had put just out of reach.


    Realizing this, she finally noticed how dry her throat was. She reached out for the water canister, but she couldnt reach it. She needed to get up.


    Dont go.


    Carynne almost got startled by Raymonds voice. She turned back to look at him, but he was just sleeptalking. He, too, had fallen asleep, exhausted.


    Finally.


    She felt the emptiness of the ce, realizing that a space devoid of people could be scary in this sense as well. She heaved a sigh.


    Just let me go


    She managed to pry his hand away from her ankle with a kick and left the bed. Unlike the sturdy Raymond, she had an ordinary persons body. Merely standing up was too much exertion for her now.


    Stepping onto the floor for the first time in a long while, she stumbled.


    Her vision spun.


    Carynne stood up and took a drink from the water canister beside the bed. The cold water flowed down her dry throat. She coughed, her hand touched her throat, and her face contorted in pain. Her throat hurt, but it wasnt just her throat.


    Her whole body ached terribly from the strain.


    Why did she engage in such activities for no reason when she could have just enjoyednguid idleness? Why did she demand such a thing in the first ce?


    Now that she thought about it, this was the first time that she initiated intimacy with him. In the past, she always died before she could get used to being with him, so Raymond always saw her as a shy and inexperienced virgin.


    But maybe that made things morefortable. Carynne might be onto something regarding why he had been holding back until now.


    He meant it when he said that he wasnt confident in controlling himself because they were alone together in this ce.


    She could also see how much he had been considerate towards her during their many honeymoons. Raymond, who could move around on his own, wasnt the kind of man Carynne could handle.


    He hadnt even allowed her to fall asleep in peace. This level of torture was unbearable.


    Making sure he was asleep, she snuck out of bed. She wanted to go downstairs, eat something, and soak up some sunlight.


    <i>Haaa</i>


    Carynne sighed as she looked at the appetizing dishes in the kitchen. She had no idea how many days she had spent lying in bed. Most of the food was smoked meat, so it wasnt a big problem, but the fowls that Raymond caught had started to rot.


    Do I have to clean this up?


    She felt nauseous. But she didnt want to wake him up since he had just finally fallen asleep. She craved to do things together, and it seemed that human desires were the real issue. So, she piled up the spoiled food in one ce and started to clean up. However, she had no idea where to dispose of the carcasses.


    This was something she had never done before. Cooking was for chefs, and cleaning was the job of the servants. She tried to rationalize it that way, but she eventually gave up and plucked a ripe tomato from the corner and bit into it.


    Im hungry


    Carynne felt the need to eat the monotonous meat again. As expected, fruits and vegetables alone wouldnt be able to provide the energy she needed. She took some tomatoes and ced them in a small basket before leaving the kitchen.


    She headed back to their bedroom. It was time to stop this and get up to resume their daily lives.


    They really needed a chef, and they should hire at least five housekeepers. Living with just the two of them was exhausting, and there was no restraint. She also longed to converse with other people.


    Just two people is too few.


    At first, she thought having just one person around would be fine, but it wasnt. Two people werent enough. She needed more people around her.


    She craved social interaction. She had initially thought theirck of intimacy was due to not having enough physical closeness before they built their rtionship, but after enduring nights that nearly broke her, she realized the importance ofpanionship.


    We need people here.


    Carynne needed people. One person wasnt enough. She needed someone to talk to,ugh with, and even argue with.


    She had always considered the individuals in this world to be mere characters in a novel, and so she kept her distance from them.


    But those meaningless connections she had thought of them as were what made up her life.


    She realized that she had always been surrounded by people. From the moment she woke up in the morning, through meals, work, and until she fell asleep, maids and servants were always by her side.


    No matter how much Raymond loved her and took on all the tasks himself, there was only so much one person could do. This was inevitable because Raymond was just one person.


    Just one year.


    All she had to do was endure for one year.

 Chapter 168

    Chapter 168


    Carynne walked down the hallway. Before that, she took out another tomato and bit into it. There were still plenty of tomatoes left, so it was okay. If they ran out, they could always get more.


    As she felt the burst of pulp in her mouth, she thought about people.


    Though they incite anger, disappointment and pain, she still needed all those countless people. Ise, Verdic, Nancy, Bowen, Donna, Countess Elva, even Crown Prince Gueuze.


    As Carynne walked, she looked down into the main hall. There, a few days ago, Raymond had left arge broom, a bucket and a rag while cleaning up. He hadnt even finished clearing up here Carynne felt her face turning slightly red.


    Seriously, this is too much Mm


    Regardless of their circumstances, it was just too much. Carynne ran her hand over her cheek and descended the stairs. She should clean up at least this much while Raymond was still asleep.


    She put down the basket of tomatoes beside her and picked up the bucket and broom.


    Ugh, its filthy.


    After leisurely surveying the area, it was clear that some time had passed. Carynne sighed as she looked at the dirty broom. It had dried up without any moisture, but it was covered in dirt. Carynne picked up the bucket and broom and headed towards the garden where the water source was located.


    Why is it so dirty when theres no one else around? Having just the two of us here is simply impossible.


    The mansion was so spacious that it didnt get dirty this quickly. Carynne grumbled while turning on the tap and filling the water jug. As the water began to fill, she rinsed out the dirty contents.


    Oh my.


    <i>Whats this?</i>


    Carynne picked up the dirty rug that plopped to the floor. Something was sparkling.


    If she were a little younger, say about twenty years younger, she would have screamed.


    She knew what this was. She picked up the shimmering object and examined the bucket with her other hand.


    It was dirty.


    She could tell what this was.


    It had turned brown over time, and there was no mistaking what it was.


    Carynne stared nkly at the object in her palm.


    How unexpected.


    It was someones fingernail.


    * * *


    <i>Dont think about it.</i>


    She couldnt exin how she had returned. Somehow, she stumbled back to the bedroom. Carynney down next to Raymond again.


    Animal blood? Raymond always prepared meat. Likemb or beef. Raymond would never bring back an animal dripping with blood like this.


    But it wasnt just blood.


    Why was there a fingernail?


    Carynne wondered if there was any animal with nails resembling human fingernails.


    Sheep, cattle, horses, chickens


    No matter how much she thought, she couldnt think of an animal with nails resembling human fingernails.


    What could it be?


    No, <i>who</i> could it be?


    Carynne.


    Yes, Lord Raymond.


    Carynne almost screamed for a moment. Raymond asked in a hoarse voice.


    When did you wake up?


    She had to smile naturally. Fortunately, it wasnt that difficult.


    Dont get up, Raymond.


    Okay.


    And, you know shouldnt we have a meal now?


    Alright.


    Raymond took Carynnes hand.


    Its nice having you beside me.


    She couldnt pull her hand away from him. But she didnt ask any more questions.


    Why were you cleaning up bloodstains?


    Whose fingernail was that?


    She didnt want to hear lies. She had to ask, but I didnt want to hear the answer. She was afraid of being disappointed. She needed to be considerate.


    Carynne felt Raymonds face descending onto her lips again and closed her eyes.


    She had no doubt about Raymonds love.


    So, she couldnt ask.


    * * *


    Really, who owned this fingernail?


    After Raymond just left, Carynne sat alone in the room, staring down at the object she had picked up.


    It had glinted at first, but upon closer inspection, it was just an ordinary piece of fingernail. It had simply sparkled in the sunlight and water.


    It was hard to make any guesses, unlike when she had seen Donnas severed hand. It was difficult to determine whether it belonged to a man or a woman. It had even been immersed in dirty water.


    Judging by the size of the nail, it wasnt from a thumb, but it looked like a mans ring finger or a womans index finger.


    The tip was damaged, but that alone couldnt guarantee its origin in the socio-economic hierarchy.


    On the flipside, there was a tooth-like mark on it. Although it wasnt covered in flesh or blood after being washed in water, there was still something that could be discerned.


    This fingernail wasnt broken. It had been pulled out.


    It must have hurt.


    Carynne raised the fingernail and examined it in the sunlight, but even then, it was difficult to deduce anything more from it.


    She had only grown older, but shecked knowledge. Its for this reason that she couldnt possibly deduce anything from this small little fingernail.


    Who could it be?


    She buried herself deeply into the bed again. It was still warm from Raymonds lingering presence. And he was probably in the kitchen right now, preparing a meal for the two of them.


    She didnt doubt Raymonds love. He wasnt the kind of man who she would doubt.


    There was no one else like them in this world. Only the two of them could truly understand each other.


    Raymond loved Carynne even when she had murdered people. But back then, he was the one to keep an eye on her, not someone suggesting, Shall we live our lives together by killing people?


    Now, Raymond was older than Carynne. Much older.


    Old geezer.


    Youre not calling me that, are you?


    Once again, she almost screamed for a moment. Raymond looked at her with a puzzled expression.


    Even if its true that Im old, you shouldnt make fun of my age. Were both in the same boat.


    Raymond extended his hand to Carynne with a smile. She took his hand, and he helped her up.


    Would you like us to have our meal here?


    She shook her head.


    No, Ill go downstairs Here, too Wed have to clean up.


    She didnt want to eat in bed. They would have to change the bed sheets. When Raymond saw Carynnes expression, he turned away, looking embarrassed.


    He genuinely seemed like an ordinary man.


    She stared at the meat. Raymond always served meat. This time as well, it was meat.


    Meat.


    Carynnes mind conjured up a horrific image, and she closed her eyes. What an excessive imagination.


    That couldnt be the case. The meat in front of her was <i>beef.</i> It was a taste she was familiar with.


    But human flesh What did human flesh taste like? Did she know what human flesh tastes like? In reality, even if human flesh was in front of her, she probably wouldnt be able to distinguish it.


    Carynne, it might be best to stop eating. There are plenty of other things we can eat, so you dont have to force yourself with that expression on your face.


    Only after hearing Raymond call her name did she manage to break free from her imagination. She lifted her head to find her knight looking at her with concern. Her face had been tense, and she realized that she had been caught in her anxiety.


    Raymond got up and poured water into Carynnes cup. It was warm water. She watched as the dried lemon slice in the cup swelled in the water and then lifted the cup to take a sip. The warm water eased her throat.


    I knew it, youre not feeling well.


    I guess not.


    Carynne replied with effort.


    <i>Im feeling disturbed because of what you were cleaning up.</i>


    She muttered silently to herself. Suddenly, the indigestion weighing heavily on her stomach felt like nothing.


    Stop being on my case, will you.


    That, well Im sorry.


    Carynne knew that Raymond had heard her muttering, given the way he bowed his head heavily when he sliced the steak for her. However, she had no energy to correct her delusions. She had endured quite a bit of his tormenting for the past few days, both physically and mentally.


    Theres no way that Raymond would serve her anything strange.


    Nevertheless, she refrained from touching the meat and instead reached for the tomatoes she had been eating earlier.

 Chapter 169

    Chapter 169


    As liquid flowed from beneath the crunchy red sphere, Carynnes unpleasant thoughts resurfaced. This was serious. But still, it was better than meat. She continued to chew on the tomato.


    She couldnt understand why she was so surprised.


    Why was she feeling so confused?


    Yesterday, while you were asleep, the delivery carriage came and went, Raymond said.


    She took the tomato out of her mouth in response.


    But why did you only bring this?


    You cant eat anything properly right now anyway.


    Even so, does that mean our choices have now been limited?


    She red at him, but he just shrugged and replied matter-of-factly.


    I thought you might need meat. Your face has looked too pale since earlier.


    Do we have any sweets?


    Yes.


    Give them to me right now.


    If you eat sweets, itll only spoil your appetite. Ill give them to you after the meal, once your digestion has settled.


    Carynne was shocked and opened her mouth wide. She gripped a firm tomato in her hand and gave Raymond a stern look.


    Youre not going to suggest that I skip even my dessert, are you? Do I have to be restricted so much that even my meals are being policed?


    Its just a suggestion.


    Trying to control me, arent you?


    Thats not it. I just


    Raymond stopped talking. And eventually, with a sigh, he caught the tomato that she had thrown at him.


    Should I have let it hit me?


    I threw it because I knew youd catch it, so dont bother.


    Raymond ced the tomato on the dining table and sighed.


    I probably still should have gotten hit and pretend to act pitiful in front of you. Anyway, fine, I understand.


    Raymond raised his hands in surrender.


    He seemed much too amodating. It was hard to think of him as the same man who was preventing her from meeting other people.


    So, Carynne threw another tomato. Raymond, once again, did not let it hit him.


    A quiet meal finally came to an end, and he brought some sweets for her. Seated on a mint-colored, long sofa, She examined the sweets he had brought for herchocte-covered biscuits and apple pie.


    Lance made these, didnt he?


    Her face lit up. Lance, who used to be the pastry chef at the Tes Mansion, had a distinctive touch that was instantly recognizable. Since Raymond wasnt particrly fond of sweets, she praised him to encourage Lance to improve his skills. Consequently, she had to pay more attention to her figure as time went on.


    The generous sprinkling of almond powder and the crispy outeryer of the pie seemed slightly overdone, but she preferred it that way.


    As she bit into it, the sweet taste spread in her mouth. She closed her eyes and savored the sweetness. It wasnt incredibly luxurious, but for her, who had been deprived of sweets for a long time, it was enough. She wanted to eat something other than meat. While Carynne enjoyed the snack, her eyes closed in bliss, Raymond asked.


    Are you satisfied?


    She wasntpletely satisfied. She opened her eyes and looked at him.


    A little.


    People were so simple. Once their desires were fulfilled, their tension and depression disappeared. Nothing had changed, yet her body had involuntarily be happier. She couldnt help but smile at herself. It wasnt a bitter or mocking smile, but a content one.


    Would you like one?


    Thank you.


    Well, youre the one who brought them anyway, Sir Raymond.


    Raymond epted a piece of pie from her and ate it. While watching Raymond chew, Carynne asked him a question.


    How is Lance doing?


    Hes mentoring bakers in the city.


    I thought hes already retired.


    Hes not old enough to retire yet. Lance still hasnt gotten married.


    Oh my.


    She was surprised by the unexpected remark. Lance was older than Raymond, and it was unusual for him not to be married yet. Typically, by his age, someone would already have a couple of children.


    I didnt know that. Well, its not really important, she answered. We didnt really have the time to discuss that. Does Xenon also fall into that category?


    No, Xenon he got married a long time ago.


    I seem to have missed out on a lot.


    As she talked about people who were no longer here, she felt a sense of regret. She realized that this wasnt the life she had wanted. She said to Raymond,


    Sir Raymond, dont you ever feel like you need more people around?


    When she asked this question, he looked somewhat awkward.


    Carynne, as you know the first time you died was inside this house.


    Was it?


    Yes.


    How did it go again?


    Carynne averted her gaze and reached for another snack. As the sweet taste filled her mouth, the memory came back.


    The first time she died, it was through poison.


    Id like to avoid anything risky since we dont know how things will be within a year.


    Raymond sighed and got up. She realized that he was going back to work. Due to their excessive indulgence of each other for the past few days, the work had piled up and had to be postponed.


    What kind of work was he taking on right now? She was curious. Even though Raymond and Carynne shared the same space, they were constantly missing out on what was important to each other. They were dying the present to a year from now.


    Endure. Dont ask. Its not what matters.


    I hope you can be patient for a little longer. Lets do whatever and go wherever we want after a year.


    But how much did he really know? She was curious. She tried to hold it in.


    Raymond got up and turned to leave againto go to his office, where he was doing things that he wasnt telling Carynne.


    Maybe he wasnt staying in that office at all. Maybe he was doing something in another ce that she didnt know about.


    But, whatever he was doing, Carynne didnt need to worry about it. Theres no need to know. He wouldnt harm her.


    But still


    So, who owns the fingernails that youve pulled out?


    Raymond stopped in his tracks. Carynne regretted asking the question. Raymond turned around. Carynne lowered her head.


    It felt a bit ufortable to look at him. Would he get angry? Or would he feel awkward? She just remembered that she already decided not to ask him.


    But she just couldnt bear not to.


    Carynne.


    Raymond approached her and knelt down on one knee. He looked up at Carynne from beneath as she had bowed her head. He ced one hand on hers.


    His face looked so incredibly gentle and so incredibly affectionate, showing no signs of dirtiness or cruelty.


    Is that why you were ufortable all this time?


    She unclenched her fist. Inside it was the fingernail she had found. Raymond took it from her and put it in his front pocket. Looking into Carynnes face, Raymond spoke.


    Its necessary work, so theres nothing to be scared of.


    Necessary?


    It was a very clear answer. Raymond didnt get angry, nor did he seem flustered. It was because it was something he considered perfectly natural.


    Yes. Its to gather as much information as possible. Theres nothing for you to be scared of.


    He gave Carynnes shoulder a firm squeeze. Then, Raymond got up.


    So please dont think about such things.


    He was willing to handle the dirty and unpleasant tasks himself.


    * * *


    Raymond brushed his disheveled hair nervously and picked up the pliers.


    Damn it.


    He didnt want to show any dirty business to Carynne, but he had made a mistake. Raymond felt pathetic about himself and nudged the thing in front of him with the pliers.


    Its been dead for a long time.


    But he had obtained everything he needed, so it didnt matter.


    Raymond knew well that even if Carynne tried to kill someone, she would do it very clumsily. With her feeble arms, she wouldnt be able to do it properly.


    Such rough tasks were up to the husband.


    Raymond began to clear away the mess in front of him to finish his work.

 Chapter 170 | The others

    Chapter 170 | The others


    Carynne loves Raymond.


    But as time passed and she started to be disconnected from everyone except Raymond, Carynne had more time to think.


    Did love mean that they had to be alone together?


    Would things really change after one year?


    There was no such thing as a world inside a novel.


    But Carynne still felt like she was inside it.


    This time, however, there were now two people trapped inside the novel.


    * * *


    The catalyst was a fingernail.


    Raymond didnt say who the owner of that fingernail was. He seemed like he might tell her the truth if shed just push him, but Carynne didnt want to.


    Discovering her fingernail didnt change anything.


    Raymond casually epted her question and said it was necessary, then cut it off.


    After that, Carynne couldnt find anything strange, and Raymond didnt give himself away. Even without talking about it, their conversations flowed smoothly, and the scenery around them was peaceful.


    There were many things better left unspoken.


    Right now, they were lovers who were madly in love with each other, but a year from now, they might be people separated by death again. They didnt want to make things ufortable with unnecessary conflicts.


    Carynne felt that way, and so did Raymond.


    Time flowed as it always did, neither too fast nor too slow.


    The early summer had arrived. The roses at the Tes Mansion bloomed magnificently, just as Ise used to boast.


    It was a radiant summer.


    The lushly blooming roses remained beautiful even in the owners indifference, and there were still various breeds like a tribute to the deceased mistress.


    Among them, the prominently blooming roses stood out. The outer petals were white, and the inner petals were red.


    It was the first time she was seeing this kind of rose. After making a wreath out of the roses, from a distance, it resembled a crown in its beauty.


    The harmony of pale pink petals, not bright red, and gentle white petals was incredibly beautiful. Carynne plucked one of the roses and shook off a small insect that clung to it.


    Despite the beauty of the roses, theirck of care was evident. Faint traces of leaves being nibbled by insects were visible, and there were many weeds mixed in. The branches were also untrimmed.


    Still, this touch of wildness added to their charm. It wasnt bad at all. For now.


    With insects present, old-fashioned clothing, and limited cosmetics, this ce still exuded peace. So, there was no need to worry.


    But Carynne kept thinking about one person who continued to gnaw at her mind, no matter how much she tried to shake it off, like the bugs in this rose garden.


    <i>Is Ise Evans still missing?</i>


    Carynne didnt like Ise, but she didnt hate her either. After all, what was the point of getting angry at a fictional character? That was her creed.


    Even when her father got swindled by that man and lost all his property.


    Even when she became a maid for a young woman who was, hierarchically speaking, supposed to be Carynnes maid instead.


    Even when she got pped for mere soup getting cold, or when she had to endure the sticky hands of middle-aged men, or when she worked day and night until she copsed while walking.


    Its okay. Its okay.


    She didnt hate. She didnt love. She wasnt afraid. She wasnt sad.


    Everything was a part of the story. She had the conviction that, as time passed, she would eventually reach the end and return to her ce. That was the only thing she sought.


    She would repeat the cycle. She wouldnt regret. She thought that this was natural.


    Right now, everything hase alive once again.


    Donna was once again aundry maid who couldnt do her job well, and Tom was probably getting a beating from Thomas right now.


    But Carynne couldnt understand why Ise kept bothering her so much.


    No, maybe this, too, was only natural.


    If Carynne were the heroine of a romance novel, wasnt Ise just a supporting character?


    The supporting character who causes trouble for the heroine until the end and then exits disgracefully. An ending that suits her.


    Do you like my ne?


    Youre my maid right now!


    How dare you How How dare


    Ise was jealous of Carynne. It was tant. Starting with trying to capture Raymonds attention, then drawing peoples attention in social circles, and just moving around and smiling.


    Carynne couldntprehend it.


    In the end, it was just about outward appearance. Just because she had the tendency to draw peoples attention.


    Carynne had no money, and she had no powerful parents. Even if she became Verdics legitimate daughter, nothing changed. Verdic ruthlessly whipped her, his non-biological daughter, and when Ise woke up, he eventually led Carynne to her death.


    All that remained for Carynne was Raymonds sympathy. Because of that, Verdic killed Carynne dozens of times more.


    Carynne thought about the fingernail.


    She looked at her own fingernail. It was hard to tell. Someone had pulled out that fingernail.


    Raymond had pulled it out. To obtain information. Or perhaps to vent his frustrations.


    Ise was missing.


    Was Ise the owner of the fingernail?


    But, whats wrong with that?


    Even if Raymond loved Carynne, needed her, and pulled someones fingernail for that reason, why should Carynne me Raymond? Why should she be surprised by it?


    However, Carynne found the idea that Ise might be the owner of that fingernail strangely ufortable.


    Why was this thought so unsettling?


    She was okay about being inside a novel.


    She was okay withing back to life.


    She was okay about having died several times.


    However


    Ise never once killed Carynne.


    The offspring are also guilty, Carynne. Everyone is influenced by their parents. They inherit wealth and a name, so why do you think they shouldnt inherit crimes? And if they grew up under such a person, its obvious. That child will be a criminal too.


    Ise looked at Carynne pitifully as she said this. Carynne had this thought back thenWould Ise ept the same fate if the same situation happened to her?


    Ises father, Verdic Evans, killed Carynne Hare several times.


    So, did Raymond kill Ise? Would Ise ept the death thats brought upon her?


    Of course not. Just like everyone else. Raymond was the exception, and Carynne thought that was enough.


    But the idea of Ise Evans being tortured and killed by Raymond was something she was unexpectedly ufortable about.


    If Carynne had personally killed Ise, she wouldnt have felt bad. She would have felt even more thrilled if she had done it in front of Verdic, too.


    And yet, the assumption that Raymond had tortured and killed Ise was strangely ufortable to her.


    Whats the difference? Carynne continued to ponder. All she could do, in this mansion where there were only two of them, was think.


    Then, she reached an immature conclusion.


    Shed been dismissing so many things due to the premise that this world was inside a novel, yet she herself had already admitted that the world was, in fact, <i>not</i> inside a novel.


    This was about <i>real</i> people now.


    She was a human being, and Ise was a human being, too.


    And Ise, in the end, was one rare human being who had never killed Carynne even once.


    <i>Haa.</i>


    But Carynne sighed with her eyes closed. She couldnt make heads or tails of this at all. Who was she sympathizing with?


    Ultimately, this was also merely unnecessary and cheap sympathy, or perhaps her own amusement, which was something she didnt need to think about. This was a luxurious surplus of emotion.


    Carynne sighed.


    She had spent too much time with Ise, that was clear.


    But her contemtion was very brief. In this life too, there was peace for a while, but eventually time would pass, and events would unfold.


    She listened to the song of a mockingbird. The scent of roses wafted in the air. The poetry book she had been holding was lying beside her.


    Carynne realized that she was lying on a bench in the garden, having apparently dozed off. Her mind was foggy, and she slowly opened her eyes.


    She sensed someones presence.


    And it wasnt just anyoneit was still Raymond. His golden hair glistened in the sunset.


    However, he wasnt acting quite normally.


    Carynne wondered if she had fallen asleep and he might not have been able to wake her up. But even if that were the case, Raymond seemed to be acting too strange.


    Whats going on with him?


    Raymond either didnt notice Carynnes gaze or was preupied elsewhere.


    But he wasnt doing anything in particr. He wasnt speaking, and he wasnt watching. Raymond was just restlessly pacing around Carynne.

 Chapter 171

    Chapter 171


    There was a sense that he needed to say something important to her but couldnt, and he appeared indecisive. Anyone whod watch him like this would feel increasingly uneasy.


    <i>Hm, ahem.</i>


    Carynne cleared her throat. However, Raymond continued his hesitant steps without stopping. He seemed deeply lost in thought.


    Sir Raymond.


    Carynne, are you awake?


    He halted his steps, but his expression was awkward, and his fingers fidgeted.


    Did you manage to ruin dinner, or did you tear my clothes again?


    No.


    Then why do you look so distracted? Your buttons are even misaligned.


    He grumbled.


    Well, there are only two of us anyway I apologize.


    As she beckoned Raymond toe, he approached the bench. She sat up straight and unbuttoned and rebuttoned his shirt.


    I can do it.


    Your mind seems too scattered right now. Whats going on?


    Something hase up that I cant postpone any longer.


    What could it be?


    Carynne sensed a slight tremor of curiosity. Procrastinating, anxious. It was something rarely seen in Raymond.


    Why dont you just say it instead of being so indecisive? Just tell me.


    When she looked at him, he answered with a slight frown. It seemed like he didnt like saying these words.


    Carynne, how well can you handle a gun?


    It was an unexpected question. She was slightly taken aback but replied.


    Just I know at least how to put bullets into the barrel of a pistol to load it.


    Ill give you a rifle. Can you snipe a persons head from the third floor of the mansion to the garden?


    Is that even possible for me?


    Carynne looked at him with a bewildered expression, but he remained serious. He rubbed his chin and asked again.


    Then lets assume you have an axe.


    I dont have one.


    But he continued speaking while drawing a long axe in the air with his hand.


    Assuming you have an axe, well, not to that extent, but someone like Xenon If a regr adult man were to charge at you, could you strike his neck with an axe?


    If someone else restrained or drugged the man to make him unable to move properly, then I could do it.


    How did you kill Crown Prince Gueuze?


    Watching Raymond put on an expression like, You can do it! she jabbed her finger into his chest to snap him out of it.


    Donna helped me. And hitting someone from behind while theyre distracted with other things ispletely different from confronting someone whos rushing straight at me. Why are you asking this? You know better.


    He pressed his forehead with his hand.


    He realized he had been saying a series of foolish things.


    Its easy to throw a hand grenade.


    It seemed he still hadnt fully grasped it.


    Carynne stared at him, getting too exasperated to continue speaking. As silence lingered, Raymond finally bowed his head, intertwining his fingers together. His expression was grim.


    Im getting old. I think Im going senile.


    No, its a relief, Sir Raymond. But why are you acting like this?


    Because I think you should stay alone, Carynne.


    Time had passed without her noticing. She had finally understood why he was acting so strangely. It was time for her to be alone in this mansion. That time hade. Three months had passed.


    It was the day Raymond had to leave for work.


    * * *


    Raymond held a grenade in his hand and enthusiastically exined. In summary, all she had to do was pull the pin and throw it. Then, he handed her a decorative item of simr weight.


    Lets start by testing throwing this. Its dangerous inside the house.


    Carynne stared at it silently.


    What if I throw a grenade and it causes a wildfire? Whos going to put it out?


    I will


    Despite answering like that, he soon realized it was impossible and fell silent.


    In the end, the only thing she could handle was a pistol simr to the one he used. He gave her the pistol with a not-so-pleased expression.


    I guess Im still uneasy about this. If bandits or wild animals attack, youll be defenseless.


    Thats why I said we shouldnt be without servants.


    How can we trust the servants?


    In life, there are things that cannot be avoided no matter how hard one tries. He was no exception to this. The butterfly effects that had umted before the repetition created the events of the present. Raymond had no choice but to leave Carynne at this moment. Just as he had no choice but to report for duty when Crown Prince Gueuze had approached her.


    She had listened to him for a long time about how to effectively wield a hand axe and how to load a rifle and advance in a firing position, but in her eyes, it seemed like an impossible task.


    Youre leaving in a few days, so how effective is all of this now? Why didnt you say anything until now?


    I thought Id be able toe back in just one day.


    But has the n changed?


    Yes, the target is in a different location than before.


    I see.


    After struggling in the garden and the hall for a while, they both decided to have a cup of tea in the drawing-room.


    I even considered taking you with me, but that seemed more dangerous.


    Me?


    Raymond shrugged casually, saying it was just a hypothetical situation.


    Carynne thought about arguing with him as he was talking nonsense, but she just sipped her tea quietly though it was too hot. She was too tired, and she couldnt even taste the vor of the tea.


    If you at least had the physique and strength like Xenon, I would take you with me.


    Raymond, Xenon is stronger than most men, isnt he?


    Its a meaningless assumption. Besides, even if you gained weight, you wouldnt grow taller.


    He sighed and said, making a face that looked like he was wishing things were different.


    Ah I remember that too


    <i>Just forget about it.</i>


    Carynne blushed, thinking about a time when she had gained weight but wasnt satisfied with her appearance.


    By the way, why didnt you try to build muscle? Its better to have a strong body than a weak one. It might be a bit challenging in just a year, but how about seriously training your bodyter? Ill help you.


    Hearing him say that, she couldnt help but imagine how her thin arms would be if theyd be the same size as her waist.


    I dont want to, she replied firmly.


    Think about it, Carynne. If you have a strong physique, no one will underestimate you wherever you go. It would certainly be convenient.


    Thats because youre a man. What use do I have for getting stronger? And I cant suddenly be as tall or muscr as you.


    It would reduce the chances of you dying.


    Raymond, stop it with the unfunny jokes.


    Im being serious though.


    <i>Stop.</i>


    When Carynne pinched Raymonds side hard, he made a sound like <i>ouch</i> and finally stopped. Then, he chuckled to himself, as if he realized how impractical it all sounded. He sighed.


    Its certainly making me feel uneasy. Youve never been in danger in this iteration.


    Well, most of what I did was just work. Back then I guess I moved a bit aggressively because of the bacsh.


    Carynne had always been scheduled to die in a years time, but she hadnt died before that designated time. Even when faced with life-threatening situations, she wouldnt die.


    However, after 117 years, this unspoken rule changed, allowing her to die before the designated time. But still, if she wouldnt push herself too hard, she felt like she would live reasonably well until a year passed.


    Nothing major will happen.


    In reality, even if she died and started over, it wasnt as terrifying anymore. It was because Raymond remembers.


    She didnt have to be scared about starting all over again, because even if she would, theres someone who could remember her.

 Chapter 172

    Chapter 172


    Well, anyway, even if I die, Ill start over anyway.


    Dont talk like that.


    Still. Dont be so afraid. Its not just this timewe can start over again. Even if I die, Ille back to life.


    Raymond and Carynne had plenty of opportunities. She could die several times, and he would remember it all.


    By the way, Raymond, youre probably not scared of dying now either.


    What?


    You used to be scared before.


    Did I?


    He looked slightly puzzled. She just chuckled softly.


    Do you remember when you used to wake up in the middle of the night, frightened?


    Yes.


    His eyes slightly wrinkled as if he were probing the distant past.


    The conversation fell silent again. She regretted bringing up death so casually. Recent short deaths, which were aedy to her, were probably decades of repetition for the one who was left behind.


    To avoid seeing his darkened expression, she would have to try not to die this time too. It seemed that Raymond was more afraid of Carynnes death than Carynne herself. Those who watched someone elses death would feel more tormentpared to the one who had died.


    He was the one who initiated the conversation again.


    First, Ill set up traps in the forest and at the entrance.


    Thats fine. But can I go out during that time?


    Ill exin everything properly, so please remember it well.


    Alright.


    As she sighed, he stood up and gently pulled her by the nape of her neck. His lips brushed hers briefly before he retreated.


    Finish your tea first.


    Just a moment.


    Raymonds breath became slightly uneven. The taste of tea lingered on his lips, but it seemed to have a sweeter taste than the tea in the cup, even though it was the same tea. She pulled him closer. Their tongues intertwined, and their breaths mingled.


    Physical intimacy between them now feltpletely natural. He must have really been quite bored during her absence. She thought about this while looking up at him.


    His eyes curved, and she liked the vibrant emerald hues in his irises. It was a rare expression that she only asionally saw, especially in the very end.


    Raymond pulled away slightly and spoke.


    Ill stop by the capital on the way back and bring some clothes for you. What do you think?


    Its just ready-made clothes, anyway.


    She didnt have high expectations for clothes from there. He petted her head reassuringly in response to her grumbling.


    I <i>am</i> old, you know, he said.


    Yes.


    Ill be the first to bring clothes that will be in fashion in a few decades.


    That actually sounded quite amusing. Carynne wrapped her arms around Raymonds neck.


    * * *


    In two days, she would have to spend time alone without him. She dipped her feet into the creek and pondered what to do.


    Should she search through the mansion and investigate what he had been up to until now? Or perhaps indulge in some primalziness that she hadnt done while Raymond was around? Just stockpile snacks and stay in bed without taking a single step outside. That also sounded quite appealing.


    But no matter how long they had been together, Carynne knew she had to maintain her daily routine of bathing, grooming, and staying active while she was with Raymond. Perhaps while he was away, she could indulge in extremeziness for a change, since she would be truly alone.


    Ah, never mind.


    At the very least, she had to feed the livestock. Cleaning might be optional, but there were still responsibilities for her to do. She sighed. Perhaps it would have been better to have hired help, even if it meant risking her life.


    And then, the wind began to blow strongly.


    Oh, goodness.


    Carynne sighed as she watched her hat, which she had ced on her head, fall into the water. It was a new one, so she didnt want to just discard it. She looked at the mansion.


    Raymond was busy preparing for his departure in two days. She looked at the creek. It wasnt very deep, barely reaching her waist.


    And the clothes she was wearing were the rough garments worn by the servants. They were much cheaper and lower in quality than the hat. She stood up and waded into the water.


    Then she grabbed the hat.


    Carynne shook the water off it. The creek wasnt very deep. And as she stepped out of the creek.


    AH!


    She slipped on a rock at the creek bottom and fell into the water. Water filled her vision. Leaves and petals that had fallen onto the surface of the water swirled around.


    Carynne tried to regain her posture. It wasnt a panic-inducing situation. But she continued to slip on the rocks, and the skirt she was wearing felt heavy as she struggled.


    Ugh. Damn it.


    She realized that she was wearing an underskirt she had ordered, which she had forgotten about. It wasyered withce, making it quite heavy.


    Could it be that shell die like this in this iteration?


    Carynne was somewhat amazed at herself. How could she die in such a ridiculous manner? Well, there had been a time when she drowned in a te of water. idents happen, dont they? Its not always easy to die. Sometimes, you just identally end up drowning.


    She felt her strength gradually draining away.


    The sky seen from underwater was beautiful. Even as her breath was being cut off, oddly enough, it didnt feel painful.


    It was a silent and peaceful ce. She faintly smiled while looking at the sky. This time, it was fine.


    This time, she was okay. Raymond would remember her, and even if she died, he woulde find her again. She waited for death to find her once again while submerged in the water.


    But she worried that Raymond would be sad.


    <i>Look at this, Raymond.</i>


    <i>Hiring servants would have been better.</i>


    Next time, she had to make sure to say that.


    However, Her wish wasnt immediately fulfilled. As she was drowning, someone strongly lifted her out of the water.


    <i>Saash!</i>


    Carynne clung to that arm and was weed by the world, which was weing her back abruptly once again.


    Returning to the surface was painful. She was lifted out of the water, and the world outside the water brought her pain. She was pulled up, and she copsed on the waters edge, coughing.


    <i>Cough, cough! Ugh!</i>


    Water came up from her throat. Liquid, whether tears or water, flowed from her eyes.


    Damn it Are you crazy? Huh? What are you doing right now?


    Carynne looked at the person who had pulled her out. And, she blinked. Its not Raymond.


    Come back to your senses, the man said respectfully.


    She initially thought it was someone she hadnt met before. But the voice was familiar. And this person absolutely shouldnt be here. He was someone who should never act like this. It felt like her throat was closing up. She thought she had vomited all the water, but her throat still felt blocked.


    Thank you.


    It was Verdic Evans.


    * * *


    Carynne couldnt recognize him at first. She was shocked twice when she finally did.


    First, she was surprised that she didnt recognize Verdic Evans. And second, she was even more surprised by his appearance. Human beings were not always unchanging, but Verdic Evans had always been consistently the same for a hundred years.


    He always wore expensive suits, always neatly slicked back his hair with just the right amount of oil, always had his mustache neatly groomed. He kept his beard neatly trimmed, maintaining a sharp and clean jawline that defied his age. His beard was always cleanly shaven, and his perfectly tailored suits entuated his slightly plump figure in an aesthetically pleasing manner.


    He always had stylish sses, gloves, a cane, and a smooth voice. He appeared even more aristocratic than some nobles themselves. Still, those who wanted to knock him down a peg would say that the rings and nes that he liked wearing made him look vulgar.


    Nevertheless, he had never shown a disheveled appearance from head to toe. Even when he would rush at her to hack away at her neck. Even when his one and only daughter, Ise, had copsed.


    He <i>always</i> had an immacte appearance.


    However, the current him was entirely different.


    He wore no jewelry. His face was adorned with an unkempt stubble. Most importantly, his demeanor hadpletely changed. Perhaps it was because his hair was wet, sticking to his face.


    But clearly, that was not the only reason.

 Chapter 173

    Chapter 173


    His body, which usually looked fit, now seemed rather swollen. And his skin, which had always been smooth and had even color, was now blotchy. Verdic now looked his age, really. He was a middle-aged man.


    Water dripped down along his unmanaged beard, making him look quite disheveled. Verdic scolded a bewildered Carynne with a stern expression.


    Heavens, damn it Why were you drowning in such shallow waters when its not even that deep? Are you crazy?


    Verdic angrily removed his soaking wet clothes and wrung them out like a rag. Dirty water sshed from his mouth.


    Verdic. Him getting angry at Carynne was something she was used to, but this time it was entirely different.


    Have you gone so crazy that you want to die at such a young age?


    Miss, at your age, shouldnt you know how to live modestly? Starve yourself tonight.


    Why on earth were you in the creek?


    Did I not tell you to follow Ises whims?


    Carynne remembered what Verdic used to say when he got angry with her. It was something he often said. To him, Carynne was Ises servanta thief who stole from him.


    Cant you hear me? Why the hell were you here in the first ce?


    When Verdic asked again, Carynne finally snapped out of it. It was then that she realized how she had just stood there dumbly without responding.


    The creek isnt even that deep.


    Verdic seemed to think that Carynne was scared and intimidated by him, and so he softened his tone. His changing attitude was a strange sight. Perhaps when a person lives for a hundred years, they naturally encounter things.


    However, even during that 117th year when he killed people, he hadnt changed. That he had changed so much <i>now</i> was truly astonishing.


    Thank you sir.


    But what needed to be done now wasnt reminiscing about the past. Carynne imitated a cowering posture and replied softly, as if she was in shock.


    She considered whether she should acknowledge that she could recognize Verdic, but for now, she chose to act as if she didnt know himto dy any interactions as much as possible. She needed to avoid getting entangled with him.


    My hat flew away I was just trying to get it, but I slipped and fell into the water.


    She truly looked like she was cowering because he had been shouting at her. Carynne felt her body trembling weakly, perhaps because she hade out of the cold water. Even in the summer, the water was cold.


    My skirt got tangled, so I couldnt get out properly. Thank you, sir, for your kindness.


    Why was Verdic here? Of course, Carynne had a guess at the answer. This was the first time he was like this, but it wasnt hard to deduce why he was here.


    Why was he here? Why was he in such a miserable state?


    Carynne had gone to find Verdic only a few months ago.


    The time for Verdic and Ise to appear had passed, but they hadnt arrived. And he had given up his business at a loss. It wasnt just that Raymond had refused to marry Ise.


    He still hadnt found Ise Evans.


    So, he came here.


    * * *


    Ise.


    At first, Verdic Evans thought it might be his daughter. When he saw the hem of a dress fluttering in the water, he thought it might be her. Perhaps its Ise. Perhaps it was his own daughter in the water. His legs were practically immobile, but he jumped into the water immediately.


    However, it wasnt her.


    As he ran towards the water and lifted the woman up, Verdics tension soared when he realized it wasnt Ise. The girl was the same age as his daughter, but her hair was vivid red, unlike Ises golden blonde locks.


    It wasnt his daughter.


    Seeing the young woman coughing and vomiting water, Verdic was furious. The first emotion that surged through him after seeing the girls hair was anger. Since she had already entered the water, the force that brought her out was purely inertia, but Verdic couldnt find any joy in watching the girl breathe and cough up water.


    Why are you here like this when youre not my daughter.


    Verdic felt like tears were about toe. However, he couldnt distinguish whether the liquid running from his eyes was just the streams water or his own tears. It had been so long since he had cried that he couldnt sensitively recognize the muscle movements of shedding tears.


    But this was not the time to shed tears.


    Verdic Evanss one and only daughter, Ise Evans, disappeared, and time passed.


    Before he knew it, the seasons had already changed.


    One day, on a cold spring day when flowers hadnt even bloom yet, his daughter disappeared out of the blue.


    Ise left no words or traces behind and vanished from the world. Ise had never done something like that before. So, it was as if Ise had never existed in the world from the beginning.


    But Verdic had no idea why Ise had disappeared.


    Why did Ise vanish?


    It was just like any other day. The piano teacher had arrived for Ises regr lesson, and in the afternoon, as usual, she begged him to go downtown, and she then went with her maid.


    It was a typical, ordinary day.


    Verdic was preupied with the possibility of receiving the money he had lent to Crown Prince Gueuze on that day. He hadnt even eaten dinner and was holed up in his room, pondering over documents, bills, and consulting withwyers.


    Is Ise still asleep?


    M-Master Mdy is still


    She hasnt woken up yet? Shes excessivelyzy. Hurry up and wake her and bring her here.


    However


    The maid confessed to Verdic, trembling.


    Mdy hasnt returned home yet.


    Where did she go without saying anything?


    Verdic scowled at the thought that his daughter was causing a ruckus now. She went out without asking permission from him?


    Especially with the recent mess in his business, his head was already aching. She must learn some discipline once shed return.


    But why didnt you go with her? Who did she go with?


    Master, Miss Ise, she She left on her own.


    Verdic felt his head turn white for the first time.


    Why didnt she say anything? Why didnt she speak in time? Why were these stupid things in his house?


    And Ise, right now


    What on earth is going on here?!


    When Verdic snapped out of his thoughts at his wifes cold voice, Ises maid was clutching her stomach and kneeling. Foam was forming around her mouth. Verdic raised his boot and kicked her again.


    Aaargh!


    Evans!


    Rage could take its time. Verdic took a slow, deep breath.


    On the first day, both worry and anger arose simultaneously.


    On the second day, he couldnt do anything all day.


    From the third day onwards, Verdic began to negotiate with people. He could trust no one.


    Where could Ise have gone?


    Verdic negotiated with people, and at the same time, he waited. Ise was Verdic Evanss daughter. Many people held grudges against Verdic. But at the same time, Verdic also owned many things. Verdic expected that whoever had taken Ise away would contact him in some way.


    Ransom or revenge?


    Verdic prepared a significant amount of cash first. This was the first time Verdics daughter, Ise, had been kidnapped, but Verdic had seen such cases many times before.


    People like Verdic knew how to thrive on grudges.


    People like Verdic always had to pay attention to their security. For the wandering tribes they belonged to, cash and jewelry were the only weapons to protect themselves. They despised the many people who kidnapped family members, friends, used legal pressure, and seized property.


    Whoever took Ise would receive a price, along with money.


    Verdic swore it.


    But there was no contact.


    Verdic waited.


    There was no way there wouldnt be any contact. Verdics fortune was by no means insignificant. Moreover, Ise was Verdics one and only child. Verdics fortune would undoubtedly pass on to Ise.


    It couldnt be true. Verdic waited. He trusted and waited. It was a firm belief in human desires. Verdics fortune would never, ever be wrong.

 Chapter 174

    Chapter 174


    However, no one contacted him at all.


    Verdic locked Ises room with bloodshot eyes. It had been a month with nomunication, indicating that there was no room left for negotiation. Verdic released more manpower.


    And because he couldnt wait any longer, he started to take action himself. But no matter how hard he tried, he couldnt find Ise anywhere.


    If its not money they want, it must be revenge.


    At some point, Verdic began to wait for news of Ises corpse. If someone held a grudge, they would want that. They would want to see him suffering. Most people with a thirst for revenge were like that.


    But news did note from anywhere, reallynot from anywhere at all. No, there was plenty of news, but they were all mere lies from those who were after his money. There was no news from the real culprit. There was absolutely no concrete evidence left behind either.


    As Verdic started wasting manpower, money, and time to find Ise, his business began to waste away.


    The businesses that Verdic didnt personally oversee started showing signs of weakness and began to crumble, and strangely, idents happened more frequently. Mining explosions increased, andpetitors in the same industry multiplied. Verdic had to cut many businesses to minimize his losses.


    And after searching for his daughter for three months, he was now considering giving up.


    He had done what he could. It was time to give up.


    Verdic looked at his daughters closed door and thought so.


    He had opened his eyes to what kind of man he truly was: he was more of a businessman than a father.


    His sense of self was more fitting for a money-chasing dog, he thought. He had done everything for Ise. What couldnt be done was simply impossible.


    This came in for you.


    But his wife extended an item. Verdic looked at the package for a long while without saying a word. He had to open it. He had to confirm it. But he couldnt bring himself to open it.


    The package had the name Ise Evans written on it.


    Why now.


    * * *


    Short or long, it was a period that felt like an eternity. For five months, Verdic went through what felt like madness. It took him that long to grieve, get angry, and finally ept the situation.


    But it was precisely at this moment, as Verdic tried toe to terms with reality, that the package arrived, as if it had been waiting.


    What did they want? What could it be?


    Verdic trembled as he opened the package.


    Inside, there were strands of hair.


    Hair that was exactly the same as Ises, slightly disheveled, with a lemony hue.


    And besides that, there was nothing.


    Verdic traced the origins of the package, and eventually, it led to documents.


    The culprit had sent the package through multiple means, but trails were bound to be left behind. The culprit sent the package through multiple means and messengers, but even so, money had a way of tracing things.


    All of the packages and letters were collected in the central region before being resent, which meant Verdic would have to visit the nobles in that area to dig deeper.


    Annoyingly, Raymond Saytes, Ises former fianc, and his brother owned territory in that region.


    This is strange.


    Verdic scratched his chin and looked at the map. Was all of this just a coincidence? Lord Saytes had a somewhat strained rtionship with him.


    And further, the barons younger brother had once been engaged to Verdics daughter, which made matters even moreplicated.


    Of course, there was no direct evidence. The package had just passed through that area. But Verdic felt an uneasy hunch.


    It was the same intuition that had helped him more aptly than logic throughout all these years.


    And now, as Verdic saw this redhead, that uneasy feeling grew stronger.


    You there. Are you Carynne Hare?


    * * *


    It was fortunate that Carynne had her back turned. If Verdic had seen her face at that moment, he would have read a lot from it.


    You seem to have mistaken me for someone else.


    No, I seem to be right. A few months ago, you came as a representative of Lord Hare to terminate the contract with me, didnt you? Seeing your face, I know Im right.


    Verdic was adamant. What would be better? Carynne didnt know that he would remember their brief encounter, even in a rush.


    Her face was unforgettable, and the path of honesty might be the best to take in front of Verdics sharp senses.


    Carynnes thoughts went a mile a minute. What should she do?


    She contemted. Should she answer like this? <i>Yes, I am Carynne Hare. Hello, Mister Verdic. Have you found your daughter during this time? Oh, Im sorry to hear that youve yet to find her.</i>


    But there was no need for her to lie. The more she would, the more she was likely to reveal her ws.


    And when Carynne saw Verdics face, she could easily recall the scene of her disembodied head rolling on the ground.


    Raymond might have done something to Ise, seems like.


    That was the problem.


    Carynne thought about the fingernail she had discovered.


    Ise and Verdic were enemies of Carynne and Raymond. When Carynne imagined Raymond killing or torturing someone, the first people she thought of were Verdic and Ise.


    It was a natural assumption that the owner of that fingernail might be Ise. If Verdic found out about this, Raymonds fiance, Carynne, would likely meet the same fate as before.


    This iterations Carynne had no connection to Verdic.


    For now, that is.


    And that was the problem.


    Just because there was no connection between Carynne and Verdic now didnt guarantee it would stay that way in the future.


    No, Carynne remembered how his expression would be as hed strike her neck several times with his blunt-ded axe.


    He had killed her multiple times in the past. No matter how she thought about it, she and him were connected by dark fate. Even if they moved on from this, Carynne couldnt be sure when the story would revert to its original state.


    Why are you here?


    It was because of her history with Raymond.


    Carynne couldnt bring herself to speak. Confessing her rtionship with Raymond was one thing, but what came after was another problem.


    Raymond was the man Verdic had given to Ise. Since Raymonds rtionship with Ise had ended, it could be easily predicted that sparks would fly with Raymonds fiance, Carynne, afterwards.


    Would she die in the same manner again this time?


    Carynne felt a headacheing on. There were things that couldnt be avoided no matter how hard you tried.


    But this time, too many things had changed, and something like a miracle had urred, so Carynne thought that this would change as well. In fact, it was changing little by little.


    Still, Carynne couldnt help but think that perhaps the same life would repeat itself again this time.


    I.


    Carynne licked her lips slightly.


    I I work at this mansion.


    You dont seem like someone of that ss.


    No, she had done it a lot before. Carynne recalled the various tasks Verdic had assigned her while she had been a maid. But it wasnt ordinary work. Carynne had made up her mind.


    I I dont know what youre talking about, sir. My job is


    Are you not Carynne Hare?


    I I dont know who you are, sir. My name is


    No, am I asking for your name?


    <i>Hiic</i>


    Carynne started sobbing.


    Verdics face showed annoyance as he watched Carynne act like a coward. But this had to be done, even if it seemed absurd.


    I <i>hiic huff</i>


    Haa.


    Even the muttered curse of crazy could be faintly heard. It might sound strange, but this was the best approach. Verdic didnt have any concrete evidence right now.


    Furthermore, Carynne wasnt an immediately important figure to Verdic. He needed to talk to Raymond first.


    Carynne sobbed for a while before speaking.


    Right now, Mister Raymond is at the mansion Would you like to meet him?


    Fine. Lets do that.


    Verdic nodded with a somewhat impatient expression. Carynne led Verdic towards the mansion, water dripping from her as her body grew cold. She needed to get inside quickly, hand Verdic over to Raymond, and change her clothes.


    Is this really the ce?


    Yes, sir.


    Verdic impatiently followed Carynne with a scowl. As he observed the poorly maintained garden and the stone steps with weeds, he muttered,


    Looks like there arent many people around.


    Verdic spoke from behind Carynne.


    Yes Mister Raymond is busy, so he reduced the number of servants as much as possible.

 Chapter 175

    Chapter 175


    How many servants are here right now?


    Im the only one.


    Thats strange.


    Its not a big problem because there arent many people to serve.


    Ha.


    Verdic seemed to be growing more suspicious as time went on.


    Even to herself, it didnt sound entirely normal. Carynne was relieved that she was at least wearing her maids uniform. If she had been wearing something more extravagant, the situation would have been even moreplicated.


    So, did Sir Raymond officially hire you, Young Miss?


    Well I dont really know.


    Do you think its reasonable for you not to know about it when its your own issue?


    I dont have any memories of signing a contract.


    So, we cant even say youre a maid. Youre just a ve.


    After all, Carynne wasnt originally employed here. Carynne made an effort to appear as insignificant as possible. She had to divert as much attention away from herself as possible. Verdic seemed to be getting increasingly irritated, but she had no choice but to avoid giving straightforward answers.


    Do you think it makes sense for two adults to live together in a ce like this without a contract? No one would do that if theyre in their right minds.


    Well, Raymond was a bit like that. Carynne initially agreed but then hesitated and countered.


    Lord Raymond is my benefactor. Please dont speak ill of him.


    A person with a sound mind wouldnt handle things this way. If you want to show kindness, you should do it properly and take her back to her home. Just leaving her at home like this


    Verdic was criticizing Raymond in terms of morality. Carynne had to stifle augh at how absurd the situation was.


    He seemed to have the predilection for meddling in everything ever since Ise disappeared.


    Since when have you known Sir Raymond? And have there been any strange incidents or other women involved?


    I dont know.


    But Carynne understood Verdic. She was also very well aware of the weight of the axe he wielded.


    Should I kill him?


    Carynne thought about the traps at the entrance. Raymond had set numerous traps in the mansion.


    Verdic and Carynne had never had a positive rtionship.


    Since they had already met, excising him from the story might be the way.


    Before Verdic could kill her, she should kill him first.


    Its possible.


    She hadnt done it before because of fear. She hadnt done it before because she didnt have the opportunity.


    Carynne looked around. Verdic was following her.


    He was a well-built middle-aged man, but if she used traps instead of going into directbat, even someone rtively weak like herself might seed.


    This time, she might seed in her revenge.


    Carynne looked at therge front door before her.


    She took a shallow breath.


    <i>Lets try.</i>


    The door doesnt open properly. Could you help me?


    Carynne turned around and asked Verdic.


    There was a trap set on the door. It opened by pulling the lion-shaped door handle, but if you pulled it without untying the knot inside the handle, the rope would catch the person entering. If she was lucky, she could strangle Verdics neck at once.


    Please push this door open for me.


    Fine.


    Verdic frowned. This wasnt his job.


    Carynne inwardly rejoiced as she watched Verdic walk closer to the door. This time, she was a bit nervous, but if she killed him decisively from the beginning, both herself and Raymond would be safe.


    <i>Ba-thump.</i>


    Verdic reached the door. He adjusted the scarf around his neck. Carynne imagined herself strangling his neck right there. She could do it. Deal with Verdic and dispose of the body. She would have to clean up thoroughly.


    She couldnt do it in her past lives. Her first and foremost priority back then was to survive.


    But Verdic didnt touch the handle. Carynne waited impatiently and decided to speak up. Why was he just standing there? Had he noticed something? That couldnt be true, right?


    If you just pull this


    Lind! Come here and open the door!


    Verdic turned around and shouted. Whats going on? Carynne was taken aback, so she turned her head in the direction Verdic shouted. <i>Damn it</i>, Carynne cursed. From a distance, Verdics aide, Lind, wasing.


    Mister Verdic! Slow down, lets open the door, <i>gaaasp,</i> together


    Youre too slow, you idiot!


    Verdic yelled and gestured to his aide. There were more people. In fact, it wasnt just one person. Carynne was too tense to notice that there were others besides Verdic. <i>Damn it.</i> Carynne quietly cursed to herself once more, teeth grinding together.


    There are many guests.


    Verdic looked at his watch with a grimace as he replied.


    Who woulde all the way here alone? My watch is ruined, damn it. This was expensive Lind, open the door. It looks like there are hardly any servants at the Tes Manor right now.


    Who is this youngdy?


    The btedly arrived chubby aide looked at Carynne.


    She fell into the water, so I pulled her out. She says shes Raymonds maid.


    Please open the door.


    Carynne interrupted Verdics words. Verdic gestured with his chin towards the door. Clearly, he had no desire to even go through the trouble of opening it.


    She then counted the people behind Lind. Its not just the two of them. One, two, three Roughly six of them. There was no way that such a man as him woulde alone like this.


    Carynne hastily spoke to the aide who was about to open the door.


    You have to untie the knot inside the doorknob.


    Its quite an unusual method.


    I know. Its very different from before. It wasnt like this back then, Verdic quipped.


    There are fewer people here now.


    Carynne replied to Verdicsment, hoping it wouldnt sound like an excuse.


    Carynne felt her palms getting slightly sweaty.


    With a creaking sound, the door opened. Verdic looked inside from behind and spoke slowly.


    The inside of the house seems quite different from before.


    The n to kill Verdic in one go was a failure.


    She had expected her toe alone, and she seemed nervous as well. What could she do? With aposed face, Carynne addressed Verdic.


    Sir.


    Im Verdic Evans. I dont know how long youll pretend not to know, Young Miss.


    Ah Yes Mister Verdic. If you wait here, I will inform Lord Raymond.


    Very well. Ill wait.


    Verdic stood in the hallway and replied. There was not just one trap. And when dealing with many people, there was a certain way to handle them. Carynne sped her hands together and asked as if she were a real maid.


    Shall I bring you some tea?


    Please do.


    The aide replied willingly, staring directly at Carynnes face and smiling brightly. Carynne also smiled back at him and turned her head to Verdic.


    However, Verdic did not smile. He shook his head with a displeased expression.


    No, I dont need any.


    Mister Verdic.


    Lind, be quiet. Just notify Sir Raymond of my arrival first.


    Yes Understood.


    Mister Verdic, its not advisable to act like this. You came here without even informing Sir Raymond Saytes


    Lind.


    The aide fell silent.


    She turned and walked away. She needed to inform Raymond and figure out what to do. With Raymond, they should be able to easily eliminate three or four people. They <i>had</i> to be eliminated.


    Carynne couldnt understand why Raymond hadnt dealt with Verdic first. She needed to vent her frustrations somehow.


    * * *


    Strange.


    Verdic red at the redheaded woman.


    Theres just the two of them alone in this barons residence? Did that even make sense? It was clear they were hiding something.


    Verdic Evans clenched his fist. Doubts started creeping in.


    His daughter had disappeared. Without a trace.


    Raymond Saytes was supposed to be attending a schrly conference hosted by Countess Solia right about now.


    <i>Dont think about strange things. Dont. Youre not sure yet.</i>


    Mister Verdic Evans, isnt it? Its been a long time.


    Raymond Saytes was looking down at him from the staircase, wearing a casual smile.

 Chapter 176

    Chapter 176


    <i>Knock, knock.</i>


    After Carynne led Verdic to the hall just a moment ago, still soaked to the bone, she knocked on Raymonds door. Her head felt like it was about to explode as she thought about Verdic waiting below.


    <i>Knock</i>


    Yes.


    When she opened the door, she saw Raymond cleaning his bag and gun. It was two dayster that he was scheduled to leave the house for work. No matter how many times she died and lived again, his work always remained the same.


    He put down the items he was holding when he saw her. Then his expression changed. He realized that her entire body was drenched.


    Carynne, why are you wet?


    But she cut off his words there. That wasnt important right now. She didnt want the conversation to veer in the wrong direction. Verdic was directly below them. Time was of the essence.


    Sir Raymond, we have guests.


    Who is it?


    Mister Verdic Evans. Hes yet to say why hese to visit, but he must havee to see you.


    His eyes immediately became calm. Carynne herself wasnt worried about her being wetthat could be addressedter.


    Raymond took a moment to look at the bag and belongings he was holding and then answered.


    I see. Ill go out to meet him. First, Carynne, you should change out of those clothes.


    Yes. And he remembers me.


    Right. Youve already met before?


    We did. You and I reunited in that tower, not at my house, right? Thats because I was on my way back from canceling the contract between him and my father. I was Fathers representative.


    He nodded in response. His expression wasnt particrly positive but also not gloomy. He just seemed to think, Oh, so that man arrived.


    Raymond had certainly mentioned going to work, but he had never mentioned anything about Verdic. However, his face wasnt showing the kind of surprise youd expect from an unexpected incident, which made Carynne a bit anxious.


    Mister Verdic arrived, Raymond.


    She repeated it once more to make sure he was fully aware of the situation. Nevertheless, he remained surprisinglyposed, to the point where she felt a bit flustered herself.


    Why?


    Yes, Carynne. I will go downstairs. I didnt think that youve already met before, but it shouldnt be a big problem.


    But why would hee here.


    But she couldnt be asposed as him. She couldnt fathom his calm demeanor. She couldnt understand why he was so unflustered. <i>Why are you so unphased?</i> She was bewildered by his nonchnce, watching him check his clothes first in the mirror before leaving the room.


    Verdic had killed Carynne dozens of times before. Verdic showing up in front of her was definitely not a good sign.


    She felt like her mouth had gone dry. This timein this lifeshe thought that she finally wouldnt have any connection to Verdic.


    Now that Raymond remembered her, she believed that she hadpletely severed ties with Verdic.


    But that wasnt the case.


    She recalled the fingernail. She recalled the people panicking when Ise disappeared. She recalled the face of the haggard Verdic.


    If Raymond had truly, towards Ise If that was the case, wasnt it just a matter of time before Carynnes death would once again be triggered?


    But still, he seemed calm.


    Theres nothing much to it. I guess he has his reasons foring, but its not something you should worry about. <i>Mmh,</i> well, what can we do? Even if he recognizes you, I have no intention of sending you outside right now.


    At least, I repeatedly insinuated that I didnt recognize him. But he doesnt seem to believe it at all.


    What if you use a fake name and say that youre suffering from memory loss?


    Would he even believe that?


    Carynne didnt think Verdic would believe the fake name shed use, let alone the convenient excuse of having amnesia.


    Even if he doesnt believe it, it shouldnt be a big issue. Thats not the most important thing. But please, be careful from now on. What startled me the most was when you came in.


    When Raymond saw Carynne, who was dripping wet, his face lost color instantly. However, as she spoke about Verdic, he seemed to regain hisposure and his bewilderment vanished. He scrutinized his reflection in the mirror and straightened his attire.


    Carynne, why are you soaked?


    I fell into the stream.


    <i>Flinch.</i>


    Raymond stopped fixing his clothes and walked towards her. It seemed like that was the only thing that mattered.


    I thought you had gone swimming.


    Then, he ced both hands on her shoulders.


    But clearly, you were in danger even if you shouldnt have been.


    He started to speak, but he clenched his teeth midway. Right now, the most crucial thing to him wasnt Verdic.


    And ironically enough, the fact that Verdic was waiting outside was whats still anchoring down Raymonds rationality.


    If Verdic hadnt been there, Carynne was a bit scared of what Raymond might have said. His expression was that serious.


    Im d youre not hurt, but from now on, please refrain from going outside alone. Especially when Im not here. You must stay inside the house at all times. Verdic, he No, in fact, it would be best if you just stay here and dont go out from now on. Just act like youre a maid.


    Sir Raymond.


    As for Verdic, Ill handle it. Dont worry too much. Change out of your clothes.


    He asked her to change her clothes and exhaled a sigh. Then, he finished packing his bag and ced it under the bed.


    * * *


    Its been a while, Mister Verdic Evans.


    Verdic looked at Raymond and felt an unfamiliar, odd sensation. The Raymond in front of him was undoubtedly the same young man he had been acquainted with all these years, but His attitude, the look in his eyes, and his voice


    Everything felt oddly disquieting.


    Why?


    Verdic was skilled at reading people.


    He had watched Raymond since he was very young, even when Raymond was still just at the height beneath his chest.


    Raymond was a man akin to a doll that his daughter wanted to have for herself. Being excessivelypetent was also a problem, but the young mans youthful, rebellious spirit always glimmered in his eyes. That part of him was charming, but it was also his weakness.


    However, the Raymond before him now was strangely unsettling. Verdic did not know how to express the unfamiliarity that he was feeling.


    Youre soaked. Arent you cold?


    You dont need to worry.


    Verdic replied and regretted it slightly. He should have said that he performed an act of goodwill by saving the maid just a moment ago. Was he here to gain Raymonds approval? No.


    However, the mans gaze, truly, felt eerily ufortable. It was the same sensation that Verdic felt the moment he took a step into this mansion. No, rather, it started when he had first seen that redhead.


    Carrie, please prepare enough tea ording to the number of people.


    Raymond looked at Carynne as he gave this order, calling the name as though summoning her over.


    Verdic watched them with a pitiful expression as they engaged in a ridiculous act. Carynne to Carrie. Wasnt this quite the pointless charade?


    Looking at the red-haired woman who still wouldnt meet his gaze, Verdic pointed at her with his finger and said to Raymond,


    Is her name not Carynne instead of Carrie?


    Raymond replied with an unabashed smile.


    Ive been calling her Carrie.


    Even though Ive met that nobledy before, and she introduced herself as Carynne Hare?


    If youre going to lie, its better to change the name to something more usible. Verdic thought he might need to learn more about Carynne Hare.


    Ise Evans, his daughter, had disappeared. Yet here, why was Carynne Hare now with his daughters former fianc?


    Verdics mind began to spin rapidly.


    Raymond. Carynne Hare. Baron Saytes.


    Is that so? Well, Mister Verdic, is that the reason youre here now? If you want to conduct a thorough investigation regarding the youngdys name, youre more than wee.


    When Raymond led with this, Verdic said nothing in return.


    He didnt expect Raymond to counter like this.


    Raymond had no intention of making proper excuses right now. His attitude seemed more like, So what if you think so?


    Verdic thought of Ise, the reason he hade to this ce. The hair of Ise Evans was sent through the post that passed by this ce, and he was here to find more clues.


    He didnt have the time to dig deeper into Carynne. It might lead him off track, and he was at risk of getting lost down a fork in the road rather than sticking to the main path.


    Continuing to talk about Carynne would veer him off his main purpose.

 Chapter 177

    Chapter 177


    However, that sharp response needed to be remembered. Verdic nced towards the still wet-haired Carynne, or here, Carriewhich Verdic thought was quite an uninspired pseudonymbefore turning his head towards Raymond. The woman wasnt his priority. She could potentially be a clue, but not the most crucial one.


    Never mind. I received a letter at my home


    Lets discuss this inside.


    Raymond interrupted Verdic and turned towards the inside. His behavior was rude, yet his expression was anything but harsh. Just by his face alone, he was clearly not hiding his lingering resentment toward Verdic. It was too overt, making it suspicious.


    Then, lets go. Shall we go to the drawing room first? Im sure youre already quite familiar with this house, Mister Verdic.


    It wasnt to Verdics taste, but the mansion had its own charm, mainly due to its history. However, the current state of the house didnt appeal to him. Verdic nced around the mansions interior.


    Its been a while since I visited, so I can hardly remember anything. Id appreciate some guidance.


    With pleasure.


    There were several peculiar aspects. Why were they alone in this grand mansion, and why was the woman concealing her real name? But the most crucial issue was Verdics daughter, Ise Evans, who had gone missing. To uncover the truth, he needed Raymonds cooperation.


    Two separate cups, please.


    Yes.


    Raymond nodded to Carynne, or Carrie as she appeared to be, and she lowered her head and withdrew, behaving like a maid.


    For now, lets head to the drawing-room to discuss. I have some business to attend to shortly


    Shall I provide you with dry clothes?


    Raymond looked over Verdics wet attire, a look that was hard to decipher, whether it was kindness or ridicule, and Verdic felt a sense of humiliation for his recent actions. Why did he do something he didnt need to do.


    Im fine.


    * * *


    Carynne stared down at the teacup.


    She needed to think about what she could do.


    * * *


    But I worry for your health, Mister Verdic. Keeping wet clothes on can sap your energy. Please allow me the opportunity to extend some kindness.


    I told you already. Im fine.


    Cleaning the floor can be strenuous, Mister Verdic.


    Raymond ced his hand on Verdics shoulder. It wasnt a forceful gesture, but it carried enough pressure. While Raymond said this suggestion, he was looking down at Verdic all the while.


    <i>Such sarcasm, this scoundrel! </i>Verdic pursed his lips. But he knew what was important now. He hadnte here to be at odds with Raymond. He hade to inquire about Ise. His pride could wait.


    Verdic nodded.


    Thank you for your kindness.


    Verdic felt ufortable. The fact that he felt ufortable was ufortable, especially in front of Raymond, of all people.


    What was even more disconcerting was that Raymond seemed to be aware of Verdics difort and yet did not appear to be concerned at all. Rather, its as if Verdics difort gave him pleasure.


    Have you changed your clothes? Pleasee in.


    Verdic followed Raymonds guidance. The atmosphere of the house was different from before. Quieter. Morea deste.


    Have you dismissed all the other staff except for that one woman?


    Well, yes. I dont really need that many people. Thanks to you, I learned a lot in the military. Ah, the clothes fit you.


    Raymonds words were evidently barbed. Verdic was once again reminded that he and Raymond did not have a particrly good rtionship. Ise was the link between them, but they could never be a normal family. Not that they wished to be.


    Verdic thought about the number of people he had brought with him. He shook his head. It was useless to think about.


    Verdic changed into the dry clothes provided by Raymond. However, there was no sense of goodwill in this gesture. The clothes fit Verdic as if they were tailored for him, but they were clearly not meant for him.


    This was a servants uniform.


    You can continue wearing those clothes when you leave.


    It was humiliating, but he hade here for his daughter.


    Verdic stood there, shifting his weight from one foot to the other, then nced at Raymond and even that seemed pointless.


    Right now, he was in a position of utter weakness in front of Raymond.


    The reason I came here is for nothing else but


    I forgot. Please take a seat.


    Verdic sat in the chair Raymond pointed to and waited until Raymond took his own seat.


    May I smoke a pipe?


    I dont like the smell of tobo. But if you wish, we can open a window.


    No, its alright, Sir Raymond. Since Ive already changed my own clothes, lets talk.


    Verdic urgently spoke as he looked at Raymond. There was still something he needed to ask for from him.


    I came here to investigate a delivered package, and I need your permission.


    Is that so?


    Raymond stared intently at Verdic, who then continued to exin.


    Sir Raymond, as you are aware, your fiancemy daughter, Ise, has been missing for several months.


    Indeed, Im sorry to hear that.


    There was no trace of regret on his face. Raymonds expression remained remarkably stoic. Further, it even looked like he was feeling refreshed.


    To avoid expanding these thoughts further, Verdic bit his tongue. Striking Raymond in the face right here would only get him nowhere andplicate matters. Cooperation in the investigation would be out of the question if he were to sumb to impulse.


    However, I havent heard the reason why I should grant you the authority to investigate the package. I believe our rtionship has already ended.


    Not long ago, hair that appears to belong to my daughter was delivered to me.


    Verdic retrieved an envelope from his pocket and handed it to Raymond, who epted it and opened it.


    Just because its blond doesnt guarantee anything. My hair is blonde too. Its not that umon.


    Are you saying I wouldnt recognize my own childs hair?


    In my opinion, it just looks quitemon.


    Verdic gritted his teeth. Theres no way he wouldnt recognize Ises hair. Common blond hair, he said? No, theres no hair like Ises. Theres no person like Ise. In this whole world, theres only one Ise Evans, Verdics daughter.


    Mister Verdic, you seem exhausted. You are wee to rest here if you like.


    Baron Raymond Saytes.


    Just Sir is fine.


    Verdic stared at Raymond deliberately. He did it to convey his feelings towards him.


    I know that the package passed through this area.


    I see.


    I hope youd be willing to cooperate with the investigation.


    Raymond locked eyes with Verdic and slowly drew a line with his lips.


    I dont want to.


    Why?


    Ive been quite busytely.


    If Verdic had a gun in his hand, he might have shot Raymond then and there.


    Verdic stared at Raymond with a piercing, bloodshot gaze.


    * * *


    Carynne continued to gaze down at the teacup.


    Verdic had killed Carynne dozens of times before. That experienced, wealthy, and relentless manCarynnes arch-nemesis.


    He was shameless, openly driven by desire, and persistent in his vengeance. Knowing all of that didnt make it any less challenging.


    Carynne felt a dryness in her throat and a phantom itch between her shoulder des whenever she thought of him.


    Verdic saved Carynne? But what did that matter. Even a murderer could pick up a crying child. Its possible for them to throw a coin to a beggar on the street.


    A singr action cannot be enough to pass judgment on a person.


    Besides, Verdic was the kind of man who had set up a charity foundation for the purpose of tax evasion rather than actually help the needy.


    When Carynne earlier looked at the man, brieflyif only for a momentshe felt a flicker of bitterness as she thought of Ise. But soon, self-reproach washed over her, paired with the overwhelming instinct of self-preservation.


    She had died countless times at the hands of that despicable man.


    Raymond had killed people for Carynne. Perhaps quite a lot. Perhaps Ise as well. Ironically, feeling guilty about that now could be considered a sin.


    Did everyone drink it?


    As she stood up, she looked at Verdic and his servants. All of them had dropped unconscious.

 Chapter 178

    Chapter 178


    Raymond brought Verdic here undoubtedly as an attempt to deal with him.


    So, shouldnt she help with the rest?


    The effect of the sleeping pills was substantial.


    Verdics servants all drank the tea Carynne offered without a second thought. Afterward, they began toin about various things.


    How Verdic had gone insane after Ises disappearance, how he had been raving for months until he finally calmed down after the arrival of a strand of hair, and so on. They said they tried to dissuade him froming here, but Verdic made persistent orders that they shouldnt miss a single detail, going on an endless rant.


    But those things didnt matter.


    What mattered was that Verdic was Carynnes enemy, and they were Verdics subordinates.


    She pushed the empty teapot aside. Then she stood up.


    <i>Creak.</i>


    She scoured the kitchen. What would be the best way?


    The first thing that caught her eye in the kitchen was a kitchen knife.


    Carynne thought back to her own experiences of death. Could that be used to slit their throats? Where should she stab them? The neck, perhaps. But it seemed like it would be too difficult to finish everything in one go. Killing in one stroke was impossible.


    These people would stay in deep slumber for several hours more, so why not take them one by one? They seemed a bit heavy, but if she exerted all her strength, it might not be impossible.


    Lets put the meat in the warehouse in the kitchen. Tie them up first and then kill them one by one. Stabbing the throat should be fine.


    However, could she properly sh their throats with the kitchen knife?


    Carynne looked at the knife in her hand. It wasnt a bad item, but it didnt seem reliable.


    <i>Creak.</i>


    She opened the door to the warehouse. Drying meat was in view. These were the ones with all their skin removed.


    <i>Thunk.</i>


    As a test, she tried to stab a dead deer in the throat. Even after its outer skin was already removed, she couldnt manage to drive the de in properly. It was a matter ofcking strength.


    If she were to stab someone at this rate, she would surely just wake them up in the middle, making it more difficult.


    Perhaps it could work if those people were properly hooked like this deer here, but she wasnt confident. She was clearlycking. She needed something that she could properly wield with the strength she had now.


    As expected.


    Carynne now understood Verdic. Among items other than a gun, that particr one was his favorite.


    With an axe, there would be enough force.


    To properly sever a persons throat while they were lying down, an axe was the perfect tool for the job.


    Kitchen knife, saw, axe wheres the axe?


    There. She found it.


    A kitchen knife wasnt a good tool at all. If she stabbed a thigh with a kitchen knife, the person would undoubtedly wake up and scream. She had definitely fed them enough drugs that would keep them sleeping, but not to the point that they wouldnt feel a knife being driven into their body.


    Carynne agonized over this decision.


    Kitchen knife or axe?


    But in the end, she decided that using the axe to cut peoples throats was definitely the better choice.


    Above all, if she herself had first-hand experience with the axe. Several times before, an axe had been used to hack away at her throat, to sever her head from her body.


    Wasnt it poetic justice for her to use an axe on Verdic and his subordinates?


    Raymond would undoubtedly kill Verdic. It was necessary. It couldnt be anyone else, it had to be him.


    Carynne returned to the kitchen where Verdics subordinates were sleeping.


    <i>Screech, screeeech.</i>


    No one woke up even while they were being dragged across the floor. The effects of the sleeping pills were better than expected.


    She hoisted one of the rtively lighter subordinates and carried him. He was heavy. The mans legs dragged on the floor, but he didnt wake up. Then, she brought him into the adjacent warehouse, ced him on the ground, and held up the axe.


    What was this mans name?


    Carynne suddenly had that thought. He was one of Verdics men. He was the most fragile-looking one among them.


    She didnt know his name. He was a thin-faced man who somehow reminded her of Dun, but that was it. He wasnt an important person, and she had never encountered him properly all of her lives, all 100 years of them.


    Why was she having such thoughts?


    She shook her head. There were many people to kill. She should do what she <i>could</i> do.


    If Raymond had forsaken morality for her, she should do the same. What did it matter if Verdic was in agony over losing his daughter? What did it matter who the man under this axe was, regardless of what kind of person he might be?


    It had finally be a world where not just one human being existed, but two.


    Theres nothing else that mattered other than that.


    Aspanions, they should be for and only for each other.


    Carynne raised the axe high up.


    Then, she swung it down.


    It was an attempt to strike the mans head.


    However, the attempt failed.


    The axe got caught on something. No matter how much force she exerted, it wouldnte down. Someone was holding it. A quiet voice reached Carynnes ears.


    I asked you to fetch some tea, but I wonder why you went here instead.


    Of course, it was Raymond.


    But she couldnt understand his actions. Why was he holding the axe now?


    Carynne looked at Raymond, and Raymond looked down at Carynne. Their eyes met. His green, affectionate eyes smiled warmly, like they were saying he could die for her. He kissed her forehead and whispered. He smelled like the forest.


    Let go of the axe, Carynne.


    Why? She truly couldnt understand. Why was he telling her not to do it? Was it because he didnt want her to get her hands dirty? She gripped the axe. <i>I could do it too.</i> This was something they should share. She didnt want to leave it all to Raymond. Just as he did things for her, she wanted to understand him too.


    Please.


    She let go.


    If he wanted to kill the man in her ce, he was more suitable for it. She thought he might be dealing with Verdic right about now, but Raymond was instead here.


    Had he already killed Verdic? Was that why he came down to handle the others?


    Its not a good ce for this. The smell is disgusting. We should go outside.


    Raymond picked up the man. Ah, so was he thinking that it was better to do this elsewhere? Had she chosen the wrong location?


    She stared at him. He was now carrying the man back to the kitchen andid him down on the sofa where the others were sleeping.


    Hmm, I dont like the look of this man. I dont appreciate this type of face.


    Surely, Carrie, this isnt your type of guy, is it?


    Raymond, thats not funny.


    It was a serious question. I cant change my face, you know.


    Raymonds nonchnt banter didnt seem to indicate that he had even a single ounce of intention to kill these people.


    She asked him in a hushed tone.


    What are you doing right now?


    Why, Im releasing these people.


    Arent you going to kill them?


    <i>Shouldnt we kill them?</i>


    Why are you saying such gruesome things?


    Raymond!


    Hush, Carrie.


    Raymond replied yfully and pressed his finger to her lips. Astonished, Carynne red at his shameless face and bit his finger.


    Ouch.


    I asked what youre doing right now.


    While holding Raymonds hand, she asked again. Raymond, in one fluid motion, took Carynnes hand with his other hand, removing her grip from the weapon.


    Since Verdic is still waiting, Ill take the tea to him upstairs. Just wait quietly for now and wake up these people in about thirty minutes. Thats when I n to let Verdic go.


    What?


    Ill exinter.


    Carynne stared nkly at Raymonds back as he went to deliver the steaming tea himself.


    She could <i>not</i> understand Raymond.

 Chapter 179

    Chapter 179


    May your journey back be safe and well.


    Verdic didnt respond and threw his coat on the ground.


    Lind, give me your jacket.


    Yes.


    When he extended his hand to Lind, who was one of his attendants, the aide handed over his upper garment to Verdic.


    Compared to the clothing Verdic usually wore, it was of lower quality, but it was certainly better than the clothing Raymond had provided him.


    Even though he was an aide, Lind himself was awyer. What Raymond provided was suitable for servants in charge of menial tasks.


    Above all, regardless of the quality, Verdic was repulsed by the mere idea of wearing what Raymond had provided.


    I cant stand it at all. It feels like my body is going to rot.


    M-Master Verdic! Baron Raymond Saytes is still


    Raymond was seeing Verdic off, standing not far behind from them. Unlike Verdic, he had a smiling face.


    To disregard my favor this much It hurts, Verdic Evans.


    <i>Hah. </i>Thats not even funny.


    While Raymond picked up the piece of clothing thats been thrown haphazardly onto the ground, Verdic didnt even look back.


    Verdic couldnt tolerate the humiliation any longer. Back there, inside the mansion, Raymond hadughed at him and disrespected his request.


    How dare that scoundrel do this to him. Everything that he didincluding the fact that the fiend gave him a servants uniformwas all to humiliate him.


    Verdic made his way out of the mansion with furious haste.


    M-Master!


    The servants scurried after Verdic. He got on the carriage and said absolutely nothing for a long time.


    Are we going straight to the Evans estate, sir?


    No. Take a huge detour around the estate first. I need some time to think.


    As Lind was the man who best understood Verdics temperament, he asked Vercic about this as soon as he got on the carriage, and he also expected the resulting answer.


    Lind continued to walk on eggshells, more so after watching Verdic throw aside the upper garment he had just received.


    After losing Ise, Verdic had gone half-insane for a while.


    It was only natural for a parent to go mad when they had lost a child but the problem was that Verdic unhesitatingly resorted to violence against his subordinates whenever he felt frustrated.


    Servants like Lind, who were always by his side, constantly bore bruises on their legs, and the butler suffered from illness. Verdic had wielded a whip on the old man, ming him for not properly managing the household.


    The people around Verdic hadnt had a proper nights sleep for several months.


    Does he think we all have the same physical well-being as him?


    At least the others were physically active, but it was the worst situation for someone like Lind, who considered using a pen as his primary work.


    Verdic had particrly good physical condition, and he believed that people should keep up with him at least. He couldnt tolerate people taking a break, and neither could he stand people discussing anything other than Ises whereabouts.


    If the maids cleaned Ises room, he pped their faces. If they didnt clean it, he berated them for neglecting their duties.


    He stared threateningly when they ate, making them eat hurriedly, and cursed at them if they made any noise due to hunger.


    It was a constant cycle.


    Even so, as the days passed, the time for Verdic toe to terms with it had finallye.


    Bring the documents I let slidest time. It seems like Ive postponed work for too long.


    Finally, it seems like our master has regained his senses!


    The servants exchanged relieved nces, heaving heavy sighs of relief.


    The attendants and maids were paid workers, not family members. While some were genuinely concerned about Ises disappearance, the pain they endured under Verdics rule far outweighed any sympathy.


    A few chose to quit their jobs, and work became even harder due to the gaps left by these departures.


    Just when things were starting to return to normal, a lock of hair presumed to be Ises arrived, and the servants screamed.


    Some, filled with sympathy, hoped she was alive, while most, driven by money, expected that hell was about to unfold.


    <i>Rattle, rattle.</i>


    The carriage was quiet. The attendants exchanged meaningful nces. Verdic gripped his cane with bloodshot eyes. It seemed the matter was not resolved properly.


    The servants exchanged nces.


    It doesnt seem to have been resolved well, does it?


    Someone try talking to the master.


    Lind, why dont you ask?


    Damn it.


    Lind cleared his throat and cautiously asked Verdic a question.


    Master, how did things go with Baron Raymond Saytes?


    Why is your tone like that?


    Verdics response caught Lind off guard. He thought his master was venting his frustration unnecessarily because things werent going well.


    Uh, if I made a mistake in my words


    No, not that. Your pronunciation sounds a bit odd.


    Sir?


    Lind widened his eyes in response to Verdics unexpected remark. Verdic was staring at Linds mouth intently. Lind swallowed nervously.


    Oh Im sorry, Master. You see, the conversation between you and Baron Raymond became quite lengthy, so it seems that I fell asleep for just a little while


    Lind squeezed his eyes shut. He thought Verdic might grab onto anything and hit him on the head.


    But even so, it felt unjust. They had been too exhausted, and Verdic had been overworking his servants.


    After a brief nap in a warm ce where a beauty treated them to tea, Verdic was eyeing them as if he wanted to kill them.


    Truly pathetic. To think that you ingested whats been offered to you in that ce.


    Whats wrong, Master?


    Never mind. Lets go down to the vige first and keep an eye on things.


    Verdics words were unexpected. He hade to trace the cargo, undoubtedly granted authority by Raymond to retrieve crucial documents to find his daughter, Ise.


    Did you obtain permission from the Baron, sir?


    Lind had been expecting that Verdics request would be rejected because his expression didnt look so good. But fortunately, it seemed he got permission.


    However, Verdic shook his head.


    No, he refused. And not only that


    Refused?


    We should wait a bit longer. Lets not leave immediately.


    If you havent gotten the Barons permission, it will be difficult to investigate.


    Verdic gave the obvious answer.


    Use bribery.


    As ofte, anti-corruptionws have been strengthened.


    Youll figure it out.


    Master Evans!


    Verdic simply waved a hand at Lind, irritated by the noise, then opened the window. He looked at his subordinates with a contemptuous gaze andmanded.


    For now, stay in the vige. Keep your heads down and dont kick up anymotions.


    Verdic turned around and red at the imposing mansion afar. His subordinates remained silent.


    They didnt know what went on during the conversation between Verdic and Raymond, but they could tell that something wasnt right.


    Whatever had happened, it didnt seem like it was good news for them either.


    * * *


    Carynne sighed as she watched Verdics group move further away. She wasnt pleased.


    Is there any way to lighten up your expression? Ill be leaving tomorrow, and Id like to see you smile.


    Do I look like Im in the mood to smile right now?


    Isnt there something in life that can make you smile? Just having you by my side makes me want to smile <i>Ouch.</i>


    Carynne elbowed Raymond.


    Why did you do that?


    What are you talking about?


    She red at him.


    You should have just killed them all.


    * * *


    Verdic unpacked his luggage at an inn in a nearby vige, not at his mansion. It was a dirty ce meant for travelers to stay temporarily, but he couldnt stay at Raymonds mansion.


    Master Evans, are you all right?


    Yeah.


    But it was quite squalid. Verdic caught sight of a rat scurrying into a corner and scowled menacingly.


    As he approached a table, another attendant hurried over and spread his coat over a chair.


    Verdic slumped into that chair.


    Tell me your ns.


    After Verdic said so, Lind cautiously nced around him, then he sat across from Verdic and pushed up his sses.


    First of all, conducting an investigation without Lord Raymonds permission is difficult. Even the tax evasion incident fromst time


    Goddamn it, then rece the tax ountant we have now.


    Mister Caiman has been working for a long time and is considered trustworthy.


    Finding a trustworthy person among the tax evaders, what a joke. That guys just sitting around. Isnt it natural to rece ipetent workers?


    Lind could almost hear the echoes of Mister Caimans sobs.


    However, Lind valued his own job security more, so he no longer defended Mister Caiman.


    I understand. First, conducting the investigation without the Barons approval will limit our movements.


    Deal with it yourself. Remember that Im paying you for it. You probably dont want to be in Caimans shoes, yes?


    No, sir.


    Three days.


    I will do my best.

 Chapter 180

    Chapter 180


    When Lind responded, it looked like he was about to cry. Verdic took out his pipe again and began puffing on it.


    It would have been much easier if it were the previous Baron Saytes.


    Lind recalled the former baron. As the eldest son, it was only natural for Raymonds older brother to have be the household head of the barony. However, he had be so unwell that he had to be admitted to a nursing home, and eventually, the younger brother, Raymond, had to take up the mantle in his ce.


    It would have been much better if it were him But theres no point in talking about hypotheticals.


    How about requesting a proxy signature from the former Baron at the nursing home?


    However, even that was not a clear solution, and nor would it be certain. In the first ce, heading straight to Raymond and asking for his permission was supposed to have cut down time for the investigation into Ises whereabouts.


    Yet today, Raymond had openly mocked Verdic and refused. The former baron would not have reacted in such a waynot in the slightest.


    That mother*cking bastard.


    Sir?


    Not you.


    How could he deal with that wretch, Raymond? Verdic had essentially raised that scoundrel. He was a mere toy that Verdic had purchased to please his daughter.


    When Raymond was young, he had been a boy full of a sense of justice, and he had even confronted Verdic when he tried to take over the barony unfairly.


    That person. Hes like a knight.


    Verdic agreed with his daughter. It was clearly in the nature of the boy to pursue that line of work, and it was something that remained constant in him even as he had been educated and had evolved in other ways.


    And, true enough, this had not changed in all the years that Verdic had raised thed. Even if the boy had no money, even after his family had diminished, even after he entered the army and went to war.


    A persons very essence was not so changeable.


    Raymond had, for all his life, failed to shed itpletely. He never spoke a harsh word to Ise and had remained diligent in the army.


    But now How could it be possible for the boy to disy such a mocking attitude?


    Verdic leaned back in his chair.


    Well, it was possible, of course.


    Verdic knew that Raymond didnt have the fondest regard for his marriage to Ise. So he might have seized Ises disappearance as an opportunity.


    But could that Raymond do such a thing?


    Could a persons character, attitude, and essence change so dramatically, seemingly overnight?


    Maybe. Possible.


    But Verdic was determined to grasp at any straw.


    Once you begin to doubt one thing, there are too many other things to doubt.


    The woman Raymond was with. Perhaps he was infatuated with her. A man in love could easily be a puppet. In Verdics eyes, Raymond was still young, after all.


    Then, Ise?


    No. That thought was going too far. Verdic shook his head. That idea was out of the question. Raymond wouldnt do anything to Ise.


    Even if he wanted to get back at Verdic, he couldnt have gone that far. The fact that Verdic was so sure that Raymond wouldnt do any such thing was the very reason that Verdic chose Raymond for his daughter.


    Even if he were a man in love, Raymond would not have thrown away his morals so easilythe boys essence would not have changed so drastically. Though Raymond harbored a sense of revenge against Verdic, he wouldnt


    But he was acting so suspiciously.


    Raymond had left the military rather abruptly. ording to him, its because he had to take over as the new baron when the former barons health had rapidly declined.


    Verdic had considered waiting a bit longer to make Raymond a member of the assembly, but suddenly, three mines exploded consecutively. After Verdic had to deal with that, Ise went missing.


    Because of that, the engagement between Raymond and Ise had been nulled, and Raymond had repaid the entire principal during that time.


    Seemingly in a blink of an eye, Raymond had bepletely independent of Verdic.


    Then, could it be?


    Could all of that be just a coincidence?


    Raymond didnt even appear in high society. It wasnt like he was pouring all his time into the estate as the new baron either. The Tes Manor, which Verdic had visited for the first time after a long while, looked utterly different. The countless servants it once had all vanished.


    An empty manor.


    Living there with only that red-haired maid.


    What happened to House Hares daughter?


    Pardon?


    With that out-of-the-blue remark, Lind looked at Verdic confusedly. Verdic was annoyed by the subordinate who didnt immediately understand.


    Although the man was usually quick on the uptake, the drowsiness that had been pressing upon him seemed to render him helpless.


    Verdic restrained his temper and continued.


    Lord Hares daughter. That fief that was supposed to be thest stop on the southern railway expansion proposal.


    Ah, yes. The Hare estate.


    The fief lords daughter met me a few months ago as her fathers representative. Do you remember?


    Lind thought for a moment, then nodded.


    I remember leading her to the drawing room at that time. Even amidst the confusion, a significant beauty


    Never mind that. Anyway, didnt she look exactly like that maid at the Tes Manor earlier?


    Lind cleaned his sses and shook his head. Verdic didntment, as he understood Linds actions were to wake himself up. With his sses back on, Lind continued.


    Now that you mention it, Master, she does bear quite a resemnce. She was dressed as a maid and was soaking wet at first, but its true that her features and hair color match.


    Exactly.


    Of course, it could also be someone else who only looks simr.


    True, there should be no reason for that girl to be in that ce anyway But I need to consider all possibilities.


    Verdic scratched his chin. It felt strangely itchy.


    He could feel the unease creeping up at him. He didnt know what he should focus on.


    He couldnt ignore the suspicious person in front of him. While conducting the investigation on the package, he also needed to look into this woman.


    What was her connection to Raymond, and why was she alone with him?


    First, we need to confirm if shes Lord Hares daughter. Send someone out to their territory to check if Carynne Hare is there right now.


    * * *


    Carynne red at Raymond. He was shamelessly smiling. She didnt like his face.


    She asked in a sharp voice.


    Why did you spare that mans life and let him escape?


    Do you want to kill him?


    Verdic Evans recognized me the moment he saw me. He needs to die. Ive already gone through this several times before. That man mighte back after sniffing around for clues again. We never know.


    Carynne grabbed Raymonds arm as she said this.


    Really, she couldnt understand Raymond.


    Verdic wasnt an easy man. His cunning nature frequently caught them off guard.


    Carynne could still remember that time, during her 117th year, when Verdic had been so hellbent on hacking away at her neck. He coulde back any time.


    If Raymond had killed Ise, Verdic was the kind of man who <i>would</i> return the favor tenfold, even if it meanting back up from hell to take revenge.


    Kill him right now Kill him. Its not toote yet. Go after them and kill them all.


    But Raymond simply ced his hand on her shoulder, reassuring her. His hand wasrge and warm.


    Theres no need to do that to Verdic.


    Hes killed <i>me</i> so many times!


    Raymond smiled sadly.


    I know, Carynne.


    But how


    But, Carynne, Im always thinking of you. You are the only one who matters.


    I know.


    Then its okay, isnt it?


    Carynne gnashed her teeth. Yet even as she tried to suppress them, the strong emotions swirling within her seemed to surge upward, and she could taste the bitterness lingering on her tongue.


    If you wanted to torture Verdic yourself, Im sorry. But it will be okay.


    Thats not it.


    How easy life would be if it could be solved with just that. But resorting to torture wasnt Carynnes intent. Thats not the point here.


    Neither was her intent to kill the man driven by some drive to enact her revenge. That was a trivial thing.


    The greater problem was something else.


    Carynne <i>could not</i> understand Raymond.


    And Raymond wouldnt tell her a single thing either.


    Why was his behavior so inconsistent? He pulled out someones fingernails and killed all the foreigners that Carynne had never met before in that tower. Yet why did he leave her enemy aloneunscathed, alive?


    Wasnt it only right to kill them <i>all?</i>

 Chapter 181

    Chapter 181


    Of course, when taking a calcting approach to this, he might be right. It would be unreasonable to kill everyone when there were so many to be dealt with. Verdic hadnte alone, and he was apletely different person from Nancy or Tom, whom Carynne had killed before.


    Verdic was a middle-aged man with a prominent social position. Killing him might lead to uncontroble consequences, just like the incident with Crown Prince Gueuze a few loops ago.


    Maybe its better to just let Verdic continue living


    However, <i>however</i>


    Carynne did not want to be understanding.


    Its frustrating.


    Carynne.


    Yes.


    Raymond bowed his head. Carynne met his eyes.


    What I meant to say is Im sorry for that. There are many things that I cant help but be ashamed of.


    Carynne responded with an expressionless face to that not-so-funny remark.


    Yes.


    I told you that Id make you smile.


    Needless to say, Carynne was not smiling. It wasnt a situation to smile about. She was genuinely upset with Raymond. He didnt say important things and behaved in an iprehensible way.


    Your jokes are not funny.


    Raymond chuckled with a slight hint of bitterness. There was a somewhat embarrassed expression on his facesomehow, his appearance right now reminded her of an expression an adolescent boy might make.


    Raymond gently stroked Carynnes cheek.


    There are parts I dont want to show you, and there are things I want to do on my own. But it seems like I kept too much of it to myself.


    Raymond pursed his lips as he stared into Carynnes eyes. Then, he brushed her hair behind her ear. He looked like he didnt know what to say.


    After staring like that for a while, Raymond finally lowered his eyes.


    And slowly, he said to Carynne,


    Verdic wontst long. You dont need to be so impatient.


    The voice that whispered in her ears


    It was as gentle as it was cruel.


    * * *


    Verdic wont ever find his daughter again.


    Until the day he dies, he will search tirelessly, endlessly for his beloved daughter.


    He will not eat or drink, and he will not be able to sleep.


    Because if he does, then he may fail to find his daughter.


    Shes possibly suffering somewhere, alivethats what he must be thinking.


    He will keep living a life in which he can do nothing but keep searching.


    And he wont be able to give up.


    To ensure that he wont give up, I n to help him. Just a little.


    He will continue to hold on to hope. He will never give up. He will continue searching.


    Forever.


    Even so, he will never find her.


    Dont you worry, Carynne. He will be trapped in a true, genuine living hell.


    Ive already confirmed it.


    Death is too much of an easy respite for the likes of him. Dont you agree?


    * * *


    I knew it. That woman was Carynne Hare.


    Its not certain yet.


    Even with Linds negating words, Verdic shook his head. There was no need to be more cautious at this point. This part needed a decisive conclusion to move his work forward.


    Carynne Hare has gone missing, and a woman who cant properly state her identity has appeared elsewherea woman that looks like the spitting image of Carynne Hare. Wouldnt it be better to just think of them as the same person?


    But why would she be in this region instead?


    Do you think I know?


    Verdic immersed himself in thought while looking at the report. He had to think. Why was that woman in Raymonds mansion?


    He didnt know where they mightve missed something.


    Raymond and Carynne.


    The only one entangling them was Verdic himself. How did they get involved?


    Its suspicious, but whats important is Ises whereabouts. Even if this woman is rted to Raymond, thats a problem forter.


    The clock was ticking.


    Verdic recalled what Raymond had saidthat there was some business he needed to attend to.


    But Verdic knew most of Raymonds schedule. He usually took on unofficial tasks when Verdic and Crown Prince Gueuzes ns were aligned.


    Most of the time, its because there was a need to test out a new weapon, and Raymond was the suitable experimental rat for the job. But this time, Crown Prince Gueuze hadnt mentioned anything to Verdic.


    Who, then, gave him the task? Marquis Penceir, perhaps?


    Regardless, the point was that Raymond wasnt in the mansion at the moment.


    For that matter, why did he leave his house empty?


    The Tes Manor was normally staffed with at least fifty servants.


    But why was there only one woman?


    What was he hiding?


    Baron Raymond Saytes mentioned that hell be away for a while.


    Verdic informed his subordinates. The men exchanged nces. Only one woman was left in the barons mansion. There was no reason for them to be concerned.


    Understood. Then it should be enough for just one of us to go.


    One man was enough to deal with just one woman. And with six armed men on their side, there would be no problems at all.


    However, Verdic shook his head. There could be an unknown variable somewhere.


    Send a telegram to my mansion. Tell them I need five more men herethe ones who can keep their mouths shut.


    How do you n to proceed, Master?


    Ill be searching the Saytes mansion personally. Of course, Ill investigate that woman who calls herself Carrie, too.


    Verdic was determined to investigate <i>thoroughly</i>.


    No matter what hed find there.


    Even in the worst-case scenario, Verdic had to take action.


    There might be more people other than just Raymond and Carynne in that mansion.


    Contact Prince Gueuze as well. Tell him Ill provide a chest of gold and all the artifacts and artworks Ive been talking about. Ask him to lend us some manpower.


    Are you sure about this?


    Verdic grabbed Linds cor. <i>Sure about what? Sure about spending that money? Or sure about Ise?</i> Each question that the aide uttered angered him to the degree that it was unbearable. How could any of this be fine! But these damn idiots were nodding off in front of Verdic.


    In the end, no matter how much money he gave them, no matter how much he threatened and intimidated them, since the person involved now was not part of their families, they were iparably more indifferent than Verdic.


    Verdic could not bear to see it. How could these damn mongrels act so nonchnt with a straight face? Why were they fine?


    You Never open that yapper of yours without thinking about it first. Got it?


    Lind nodded.


    Verdic had to find her.


    His eyes were bloodshot, and a bitter taste lingered in his mouth. It had been so long since he had slept a full night.


    But even so, he couldnt fall asleep. He didnt know where his daughter was waiting for him.


    * * *


    Carynne had a duty to be moved by Raymonds love.


    No matter how intense that love might be.


    To Carynne, he was always kind. But to others, he was cruel. That made him the perfect male protagonist. A man who was kind <i>only</i> to her.


    Whatever he did, it was all for Carynne alone, even if she didnt understand, or even if she tried to keep him away.


    His love was absolute. His love was perfect.


    Carynne had an obligation to reciprocate his love.


    But sighs and sorrow didnt cease. It wasnt because Carynne was a forgiving and loving saintess even to her enemies.


    The image of the knight Carynne loved was consistent yet upside-down. It was heartbreaking.


    The knight Carynne loved was now insane, all for the sole reason of Carynne herself. She bemoaned the fact that his methods didnt seem right.


    If Carynne could remember all her deaths


    Then, Raymond could remember them all, too.


    Carynne died even on the day she had beenpletely confined to a single room.


    Back when she was exactly 117, something went wrong. Before that loop, the day of her death was absoluteit could not happen a day early or a dayte. But of course, when this absolute rule was broken right after that, she had started to move recklessly.


    In this life, if she were to hold on and endure until that predetermined day, would everything be different? Unlike all the other times, would she be able to survive past that day?


    She was anxious because there was no answer to her questions. She couldnt be sure.


    She desperately wanted to seed, but the only certainty she could cling onto was the fact that her mother had escaped from the curse of a repeated life only after giving birth to her.


    But Carynne was barren. Since Dun made her barren, the end for her would note. Even if she married Dun, the answer would note. That guy could remember nothing. And even if she were to change anything, no one knew what exactly would change.


    All she could do now was wait until <i>that</i> day.


    But this time, could it possibly be a different day?


    Even if it was, theres just one thing she had to do now.

 Chapter 182

    Chapter 182


    Going against her mood, however, the sun was shining brightly, birds were chirping, and the summer roses and carnations were in full bloom.


    Raymond carried arge bag, prepared to leave.


    Cant you tell me the exact date of when youll be back?


    There are various matters I need to tend to though. I cant give you a definite answer because some of those matters are new to me in this life. But for sure, Ill be back before that day.


    Dont forget to bring back tailored clothes for me when youe back.


    Yes. Ive clearly written down the measurements. But wouldnt it be better to gain a bit more weight? It might be better to be more generous with your sizes.


    Dont admonish me about my clothes.


    Yes.


    Also, you need to buy the shoes as ordered. I dont like cowhideit has to be sheep leather.


    But sheep leather is weak and fragile


    Its pretty though.


    Yes, I wont argue. Ill buy exactly what you wrote, so dont worry too much.


    Carynne hasnt been sleeping welltely. Her mind and heart were a mess. But unlike Carynne, Raymond had an endlessly bright face. He casually discussed clothes and shoes and went on primming himself up. And before getting on the horse, he looked at Carynne.


    Youve got no horse, so its better not to think about going downtown.


    I know.


    Once everythings done, lets go anywhere you want. Whether its a snowy in or a vast beach, it doesnt matter. Do you have a ce you want to go?


    Lets talk about itter.


    It was a conversation for another, distant day. And Carynne felt that future was truly too far away. Carynne sighed and then grabbed Raymonds shoulder, kissing his lips.


    They briefly touched and then separated. It was a brief kiss, reminiscent of a sigh.


    Carynne looked up at Raymond and said,


    Have a safe journey.


    When Carynnes face didnt brighten, Raymondperhaps intentionally pretending to be cheerfulgave a slightly forced smile.


    It would be nice if you can send me off with a smile.


    Dont wanna.


    At this rate, wont it torment you for the rest of your life if I donte back? You might think, Oh, I should have smiled at Raymond back then!


    Sir Raymond, if you donte back, I can just kill myself right away.


    At that, Raymonds face changed into aplicated expression as he immediately corrected his posture. He gently stroked Carynnes head and hunched over her. A slightly groaning voice followed.


    Mmh I want to get angry and tell you not to say that, but I have nothing to say because I also think thats the right course of action.


    Isnt it?


    Death was no longer a tragedy between them.


    As long as Carynne knew that she could start again at any given time after shed die, death was no different from a small hindrance. At least that was how Carynne saw it.


    She was more afraid of waiting than her own death.


    At the back of her mind, Carynne had already decided to immediatelymit suicide if Raymond were to die. There was no need to wait since she could die any day before <i>that</i> day.


    Ill be back in a weeks time.


    If you donte back by then, Ill kill myself. Waiting is annoying.


    Still, I hope I can live until the end.


    <i>You should say it more romantically,e on.</i>


    Do I really need to endure more in a world without you?


    It touches me to hear you say that, but shouldnt you think about the fact that Im trying right now for you, Carynne? For you to live?


    It seems like romantic words dont work that well. However, when she didnt say anything back, Raymond shrugged and reached out his hand to her.


    It was clear that he was asking for her hand. Carynne sighed for the umpteenth time and extended her hand to him.


    My lifespan is quite long, so it wont be short this time either.


    I envy you for that.


    Do you? Why dont you try living longer than me for once?


    Raymond kissed the back of her hand and stepped back.


    Anyway, Ill be back.


    Although they werent all that bright, they exchanged somewhat awkward smiles before parting ways.


    The sight of them like this was amusing, making Carynneugh again. In the end, Carynne sent Raymond off with a smile, just as he wished.


    See youter.


    His blonde hair beneath the breaking sunlight was dazzling. Carynne closed her eyes. The wind was fresh, and flower petals fell on her cheeks. The sound of flowing water and birdsong mixed in her ears, creating a peaceful scene.


    May he seed.


    The one who strives deserves to reap the harvest.


    * * *


    And then, night fell.


    Carynney alone on the bed, contemting time.


    Raymond was not home.


    She got up from the bed. Half a day had passed. He wouldnt be back for a long time. Should she go downtown by walking since there were no horses left? Should she wait until morning?


    No, thats not it. She suppressed the desire to leave the house.


    If she rashly went out and encountered a bear or got attacked by robbers and died, she wouldnt have the face to see Raymond in the next life. She decided to endure this time. Should she wait until morning though?


    But anyway, Raymond didnt say anything against wandering around the house.


    She got up.


    <i>Huu.</i>


    The bed, when alone, was incredibly cold.


    As her mind became clearer, she blinked in the darkness before getting up.


    Sleep simply wouldnte. Lying still felt suffocating after just half a day. It was challenging to endure. She needed to move her body to make herself tired.


    <i>Haa.</i>


    Carynne got off the bed, picked up a smallmp, and lit the candle inside. As the me flickered, a dim light filled the room. She held themp up and rose to her feet. There was no need to dress properly when she was alone.


    She looked in the mirror. A faint light shone through her disheveled hair. The candlelight added a sense of gloominess. Even though it was her reflection, it felt unfamiliar.


    A bit eerie.


    Carynne ran her hand through her hair. Strangely, it sent shivers down her spine.


    Why was she scared? She had killed people and wasnt afraid of death. Yet, when she opened her eyes alone in the mansion, fear crept in. Was she ultimately a weak person? She wondered if Raymond felt any fear when he was alone. He probably didnt fear much.


    She chuckled. It was difficult to imagine Raymond being afraid of anythingnot even being alone. Under normal circumstances, he would just say that its more dangerous to have people around.


    She could never imagine him being scared of thisof the same thing. Or otherwise, if he did fear it, he would think that its nothingpared to the threat a real, breathing person could pose.


    Carynne turned away from her ghostly reflection.


    In truth, her essence wasnt much different from a ghost. A wandering being, endlessly lost without finding any rest. A specter that roamed the ces where she shouldnt be mingling with people.


    Carynne shook her head.


    Its different now. Raymond was here. The fluid running through her veins is not inkits crimson blood, and they would inevitably venture out into the world together.


    Its really vast when youre alone.


    She walked through the corridors.


    The Tes Manor was truly massive. Carynne strolled through the corridors at a leisurely pace. It felt like an evening stroll.


    It was somewhat thrilling, like going on an adventure. Despite this being her home, it felt unfamiliar, like she had just arrived. In the past, countless servants were always bustling around, but now, there was no one.


    No matter how hard Raymond tried, he couldnt fill the void left by those people. However, the sense of loss from having no one at all beside her was much greater than the emptiness felt when there was once many. Going from 100 to 1 was easier to handle than having 1 to 0.


    Carynne walked through the empty corridor, closing and opening her eyes. The corridor was dark, but as she progressed, arge main hall appeared.


    The main hall had many ss windows, allowing the moonlight to stream in. Even in the dark night, the moonlight illuminated it directly, making it not too dark. Nevertheless, it was still night.


    The hall had a smooth marble floor. Since Raymond polished and cleaned it every day, it glowed even at night.


    Do I have to clean this entire ce myself now?


    Raymond had emphasized several times that there was no need to clean during his absence. It would be meaningless if she slipped and died while cleaning. She didnt have to cook either, as there were meals pre-arranged for her alreadylike jerky, military-style rations, and other foods that required no special cooking.


    However, if she truly did nothing, dust would settle, and Carynne wasnt sure if she could endure the sight of gradual filth.


    When she had been working as a maid, she had learned the basics. Although her main task was to serve as Ises emotional punching bag, she had notpletely avoided the other chores. If she were to tidy up this mansion every day, alternating betweenziness and diligence, time would pass quickly.


    <i>I just need to wait for the day I die.</i>


    And Carynne closed her eyes.

 Chapter 183

    Chapter 183


    This time, its possible that she wouldnt. As Raymond said, she might be able to enjoy the grace of heaven.


    A miracle already happenedRaymond remembered, and before that day arrived, Carynne could have died.


    Perhaps she wouldnt die now, and she might face the day after that, and the day after. That day could be her true birthday.


    Lets go anywhere. Whether its a snowy in or a vast beach.


    Carynne recalled Raymonds words. Thinking of him brought a smile to her lips. Her mood improved considerably.


    Any ce would do, of course. They should celebrate once they seedter.


    Gather everyone together to mark Carynne and Raymonds true beginningcelebrate that they were not people who would eventually disappear somewhere, but true members of society among human beings.


    Blessed be their own deaths. Just like they congratted their marriages of long past.


    Even if they couldnt utter it, the couple would receive their congrattions.


    She remembered the wedding that took ce here.


    Once upon a time, when her father was alive. At that time, things mostly ended well. When was it again?


    asionally, there were such times. In the beginning, Carynne demanded love from Raymond, and he seemed to be the answer she was seeking. And because Raymond truly showed usible love to Carynne, the end was always a happy ending.


    Despite challenges from Verdic or other enemies, Raymond always returned to Carynne.


    So, he was her knight, and he remained so until that day.


    What if Raymond had been a bit less exceptional? Could she have given up quickly?


    Carynne suddenly had that thought. Believing her life was a romance novel for a hundred years and epting it from the beginning was because Raymond was so damn extraordinary.


    She chuckled. If Raymond had been more ordinary and a dirtier man, would she have been more suspicious sooner?


    She remembered their wedding.


    There were so many times, she couldnt remember exactly how many.


    When receptions were held here, the sound of shoes hitting the floor was loud yet cheerful. Carynne spun around.


    <i>Tak.</i>


    But what she wore now were not shoes but leather slippers, so only a quiet sound could be heard.


    Carynne, holding amp, sat on the central staircase.


    Being alone left her with nothing to do but think. It became tiresome to stand or move. She thought she might just lie down and consider the possibility of her own death. She should get up, though.


    The moonlight was bright, and the mansion, though quiet, was splendid and luxurious. If she closed her eyes and listened carefully, she could hear the sounds of crickets, owls, and distant weeping.


    Huh?


    Suddenly, Carynne shook her head at a strange sound. Why did she hear sobs?


    She opened her eyes. The strange sound was no longer there. Perhaps she had misheard.


    <i>Hiic</i>


    Silence hung in the air.


    A world where only she existed.


    Really?


    Was she truly alone now?


    Carynne suddenly had that thought. She closed and opened her eyes. No sound. Auditory hallucination? Carynne sighed at her own vulnerability.


    Because Im alone.


    But maybe it was a bit frightening because people had died here. Carynne stood up again.


    Who was the owner of that fingernail? Where was that person now?


    Maybe it would be good to investigate while Raymond wasnt around.


    Perhaps theyre already dead. However, the thought that there might be <i>only one</i> didnt cross her mind. It might not be just one.


    Carynne disliked the fear she felt.


    This sensation was familiar. Nights of trembling in terrorit was familiar. At times like this, anyone should be there. Raymond should be there, and at the very least, a maid like Nancy should be called. But even that was sometimes not enough.


    So she killed people.


    If something is too frightening, intentionally make it familiar.


    If looking at the darkness is frightening, step into the darkness. If dying is frightening, be a murderer. Then it feels somewhat better.


    But what if being alone is frightening?


    If she searches the house, could she find someone else?


    Would discovering a more frightening corpse make her feel less scared?


    Truly, why should she even be afraid of ghosts? Why would the fact that a person could remain sentient after death be a source of horror for someone like her?


    Suddenly, one thought led to another.


    God damn it.


    Once again, she needed to move with a gun. Even if its just a small handgun, shooting someone in the head from point nk would kill them. Even someone as weak as her could kill a person as long as shes armed with a gun. She needed that solid weight as an anchor.


    Carynne went back up the stairs, ncing around below. Thest time Raymond was cleaning, it was the floor of that hall. And what she recalled about the fingernail was something stuck to the mop used to clean that hall.


    Was someone here?


    He must have extracted that nail from somewhere in this house. Then, did someone bleed on the floor of that hall?


    Where did they go, and where did theye from? Did Raymondpletely dispose of the body? Was there only one victim? Was Carynne truly alone now?


    Her head was spinning. At a time like this, what she needed was confirmation. When darkness is frightening, step into the darkness. When ignorance is frightening, set off and find out.


    Carynne descended the stairs once again.


    <i>Ta-dak, ta-dak, ta-dak.</i>


    Her footsteps echoed loudly.


    Carynne looked down at the floor. Did Raymond scrape off blood from here? If so, did he drag a person down to the basement? Even if Carynne was alone together with Raymond in this manor, they werent always at each others side. He did various things alone.


    Could the strange sound be someone else making noise?


    She looked around. The hall was spacious, but behind the central staircase was a passage leading to the basement.


    Carynne stood in front of the basement door. It was locked.


    It reminded her of a fairy tale. A wife sneaking into her husbands room and discovering a body there. The wife, shocked, dropped the key, and the blood on the key wouldnt wash off no matter how hard she tried. And when the husband returned, he killed the wife.


    Not me.


    Carynne denied the story. It wasnt her story.


    She was doing this to understand Raymond.


    Raymond wasnt prohibiting her from going to this ce, and neither did he test her. If hed tell her something simr, its only because hes always thinking about her safetynothing more.


    In the story, the wife didnt know the husband. The husband didnt know the wife. He chose the wrong wife. If it were her If it were her, she would willingly pick up an axe with her husband, grasping love with both hands.


    <i>Rattle.</i>


    It was then. Carynne dropped the lock she had been fiddling with.


    A strange sound grew louder. However, it wasnting from the basement. It was from outside.


    Darn it.


    Carynne hastily extinguished the me of themp she was holding. It was to hide the fact that someone was there. But the sound didnt stop.


    <i>Rattle, rattle.</i>


    Carynne bit her lip and silently cursed at Raymond.


    Certainly, she shouldnt have been alone here. Raymond had misjudged.


    Urgently grabbing the hem of her skirt, she climbed up the stairs. She needed to grab the gun. The reason she couldnt sleep was due to anxiety. And she should have thought about the impending anxiety from the day Raymond left.


    <i>Bang!</i>


    Where are you rushing off to now?


    A familiar voice came from behind.


    There was no need to check who it was.

 Chapter 184

    Chapter 184


    Verdic broke through the door with dozens of stalwart men.


    What is the <i>meaning </i>of this?


    Carynnes voice, sharp and usatory, challenged Verdic.


    Indifferent to whatever Carynne might say, however, Verdic made his way in.


    Dont we have much to discuss?


    At this hour of the night? What audacity! Leave at once!


    Of course, Verdic paid no heed to Carynnes words. Pointing at Carynne with his finger, hemanded the men standing behind him.


    Carynne or should I say, <i>Carrie</i>. Take that woman away. Bind her so she cannot move.


    Yes, sir.


    Let me go! How dare you invade a home without its master Youre no better than bandits!


    And gag her as well.


    Yes.


    The men approached the struggling Carynne. Rough hands bound her, and soon, her mouth was also gagged with cloth. Carynne was forcibly seated on the sofa in the parlor, and Verdic pointed at his men.


    The first five of you, start from the ground floor, and Mister Sailun, begin from the upper floor. Search every corner.


    Should we start with ces like the attic and boiler room?


    Why was that man here? Carynnes eyes widened in recognition. She had seen his face before.


    He was a subordinate of Crown Prince Gueuze. Were Verdic and Crown Prince Gueuze more deeply connected than she thought? Was Raymond aware of all this?


    That man instructed Verdics goons.


    No, first perform a general sweep of the regr rooms, then move to the special chambers.


    Do we have blueprints?


    No.


    Then well have to search manually.


    The men dispersed. Verdic moved with them. Verdic Evans literally ransacked the house. Numerous men scoured every nook and cranny. Looking for any trace of Ise.


    * * *


    Its been a while Well, only two days, but still.


    Mmph.


    You must be missing him terribly during this time.


    Verdic gazed down at Carynne. It was hard to think of her as any other woman. And the reason a young woman would defend a young man alone was obvious.


    His own daughter had lost her senses over Raymonds face. Young girls often fell for whatever shone brightest, regardless of whaty within. He didnt know how far this woman had fallen.


    Even if you dont speak, theres much that can be done. Stay quiet.


    Verdic looked down at Carynne, then ascended the stairs himself to join the search. The library was his first stop. The men who entered before him were rummaging inside. They were sent by Crown Prince Gueuze. One of them noticed Verdic and raised one hand to halt his approach.


    Mister Verdic Evans, you should not move any further.


    Whats the issue?


    Theres a trap set up.


    What?


    Verdic halted and peered down. The darkness of the night obscured his vision. However, as he squinted, he slowly discerned something twinkling.


    What is this?


    Its a wire saw. Well, its not like itll immediately slice off a leg, but its perfect for tripping someone.


    Whats with these childish tricks?


    Perhaps its because its dangerous for a woman to be alone? Had we not been here, you might have been injured.


    Im thankful, then.


    Verdics eyebrows twitched. Raymond was indeed dripping with suspicion,ying traps in his own estate, almost as if he had anticipated their intrusion.


    Can we not move a bit faster?


    Yes, since weve found a wire saw, we dont know what else might be there. Thats why Im preventing the people working under you from moving too.


    Baron Saytes might return at any moment.


    Verdic was feeling jittery.


    He didnt know when Raymond would return. He wanted to search the house thoroughly before Raymonds return, but these childish pranks by Raymond were dying them.


    It would be more dangerous once Raymond returned. But the crown princes subordinate remained nonchnt, as it wasnt his problem.


    Verdic gnawed on his lip.


    * * *


    Carynne, bound, thought to herself.


    <i>There was nothing I could do now.</i>


    Raymond had set various traps, but they werent thoroughly prepared.


    Hell never find his daughter. Ive already checked everything.


    But that was when Carynne was away.


    In the past, Carynne had tried to kill Dun and died early. Raymonds experiments, his revenge, seeded after that. It seeded because Carynne wasnt in the house.


    Damn it!


    From a distance, Carynne heard Verdic, unable to contain his anger, shouting. Had he been caught in one of Raymonds traps?


    When entering a room, avoid the study and the kitchen Ill organize them separately, so dont enter those areas.


    Whats this?


    Just a little prank. I didnt set up anything lethal in case you identally get hurt by the traps, but theyre still dangerous.


    I see.


    However, the traps were really quite simple. In some rooms, needles would spring out, pricking a hand, and in others, a desk might topple over and bruise a foot, but there were no traps where guns would spring out or axes would suddenly drop.


    Why did Raymond set up such things?


    Verdic was not a man to be taken lightly.


    He was persistent and experienced. He would grab any minor evidence and return to seek revenge on Carynne. He would find Raymond through Carynne, and Ise through Raymond.


    And then, he would return to exact his revenge on them. Carynne thought about that fingernail. If the owner of the nail was Ise, had Raymond dealt with her sufficiently? Had he ended it perfectly?


    Sir Raymond, youre not really good at cleaning, are you?


    Carynne sighed.


    Raymond spoke with confidence, but sometimes he was careless. Under normal circumstances, over fifty servants should be managing this manor. As Raymond was just one man, he inevitably had to focus on just the more noticeable areas, sweeping and cleaning them.


    Like how she discovered the nail, he might have made a slight mistake.


    But he should have at least disposed of the body properly.


    Carynne worried that Raymond might not have done a thorough job.


    And she mulled over whether Ise was the only concern.


    But what could she do now?


    Carynne felt a bit pathetic, bound and helpless as she was, but she knew there was nothing she could do.


    More than twenty strong men hade.


    Whatever Raymond had done, subduing all these men was something only Raymond could achieve. No matter what she did, some things were just not possible.


    Her thoughts turned into dissatisfaction with Raymond.


    What on earth was he thinking?


    Carynne Hare!


    Verdic Evanss angry voice calling her from above made her stomach churn. It seemed Raymond had been up to something.


    * * *


    Verdic red at Carynne Hare and hurried down the stairs. Carynne stared back at him intently.


    What exactly is your rtionship with Sir Raymond? What are you doing here?


    But Carynne couldnt answerafter all, her mouth was gagged.


    Realizing he had asked a foolish question, Verdic roughly tore off the cloth covering her mouth.


    <i>Cough, cough</i>


    Tell me what you are hiding in this mansion. Now!


    Carynne grimaced and coughed. The position was ufortable. Her throat hurt.


    Suddenlying to the Tez Manor when the owner is absent What are <i>you</i> doing here, sir?


    Dont pretend you dont know me, Carynne Hare.


    I am not Carynne Hare.


    Carynne recalled the name she had given previously.


    My name is Carrie.


    Drop that insincere alias, Carynne.


    I cant admit to something thats not true. I am Carrie.


    She almost tripped over her words. Clearing her throat, she spoke again.


    He Lord Raymond saved me. I encountered bandits in the forest, lost my family, and was about to be killed, when he rescued me and allowed me to live in this mansion.

 Chapter 185

    Chapter 185


    And your family?


    Carynne, thinking of Nancy, tried to sound affectionately nostalgic. She was like family, after all. And shes already dead, too.


    I lived with wandering gypsies. Theyve all passed away.


    Hah!


    Verdic scoffed and grasped Carynnes chin. Her cheek was pressed in his hand. Verdic red at her, almost trembling with rage as he spoke.


    You think Im aplete fool.


    Its true. Ie from a nomadic background and owe a great debt to Sir Raymond


    Take off her shoes. And untie her.


    One of his men, confused, asked,


    Sir?


    Hurry up. Dont tell me you think this woman alone is dangerous.


    Ah, yes. Yes, of course, Master.


    His master was impatient.


    What are you doing?


    Regardless of Carynnes confusion, the man removed her shoes.


    And the socks too.


    Yes.


    What What exactly are you


    Her bare, pale feet were revealed. And so were Carynnes delicate, unblemished hands. Carynne realized why he had done this. It was immediately apparent that her lie wasnt well-crafted.


    A wandering gypsy servant girl? With hands that look like theyve never lifted anything heavier than a book? And feet without a single callus?


    Verdic pointed at Carynnes hands and feet as he spoke.


    Lord Raymond has been very helpful to me.


    A noble helping a maid!


    Hes different from the likes of you.


    Carynne raised her head and stared directly into Verdics zing eyes. Thinking about it, she had nothing more to fear. And she didnt want to fear. Whether he believed her or not didnt matter.


    And she somewhat understood why Raymond had done this.


    Carynne found it amusing to see Verdic so helplessly furious. And she had no intention of telling him the truth.


    Yes. I was a wanderer, with no one to rely on. Only Lord Raymond showed me kindness.


    <i>Hold back yourughter, Carynne.</i>


    Verdic was desperate to kill her but couldnty a hand on her. Carynne responded calmly. <i>I dont know.</i>


    Carynne, Carynne Hare. Its not good to keep this up.


    Lind, adjusting his sses, began to speak to Carynne in a softer tone. Was this an attempt at ying the carrot after the stick? How unamusing.


    Youre being deceived. The daughter of Master Verdic Evans here, Ise Evans, has been missing for almost half a year now. The prime suspect is Baron Raymond Saytes.


    She knew. Carynne closed her eyes. She didnt want to hear it.


    Suspect, you say.


    That was a lie.


    What they were saying wasnt about a legitimate suspect. She was sure of that. Because, in this ce, Raymond held an aristocratic position, and they were intruding without permission while pressuring Carynne.


    They had no right to do this. But as Carynne was ying the role of a maid named Carrie, the best she could do was to keep insisting on her story.


    However, thinking she might have understood, Lind continued talking.


    Think about it. Living alone in such a grand mansionit doesnt look right. This isnt normal.


    Lord Raymond doesnt like people.


    That was a lie, of course.


    Carynne chuckled inwardly and answered. But Lind, unaware, earnestly continued to speak to her.


    A ce like this needs at least a hundred people to be managed properly. And as a baron of this region, hes not fulfilling his duties properly. Carynne Alright, Carrie. I understand your desire to trust Sir Raymond, but you should not.


    Whether Carynne stayed silent or spoke, he continued. His words seemed more for Verdic behind him. If Lind wasnt speaking to her, it looked like Verdic, losing patience, might p Carynne any moment.


    Lady Ise was his fiance. And then she suddenly disappeared. Shortly after that, all the servants of this mansion were dismissed. Among them were his rtives and the gamekeeper who had looked after him since he was young. How can you trust a man who shuts himself away alone in a house after driving everyone out?


    Raymond did that entirely for Carynnes sake.


    I believe you are Carynne Hare. You disappeared, and you look exactly like that Carynne.


    I already told you. I am not Carynne. My name is Carrie.


    Enough.


    Verdic growled from behind. Lind urgently spoke to Carynne again.


    Gentlemen, as Ive said several times, I cannot agree to something thats not true. I am not the person you think, and neither is Lord Raymond.


    Though she knew they wouldnt believe her, Carynne had no choice but to repeat those words like a parrot.


    Carynne, you must be Carynne.


    I cannot give you an answer, so theres nothing I can do. Your Lordship, you should go back and seek the truth.


    Lind looked back at Verdic with a troubled expression. Verdic Evans nodded.


    Tell her. That woman is definitely Carynne Hare.


    Understood.


    The man lowered his voice.


    Miss Carynne Hare, your father has passed away.


    <i>Lord Hare couldnt ovee the grief of your disappearance. You must return.</i>


    Miss, please answer. Are you Carynne Hare? We believe that you are. And you must leave this ce with us. You should see Lord Hares face onest time before his burial.


    Carynne was taken aback by this unexpected news.


    After such a long time, here was a familiar dilemma.


    She had to think about what expression to wear, what reaction to choose. It was hard to know what she was feeling at the moment. It was a sense of detachment from the world, once again.


    I am.


    To maintain her response so far, Carynne had to only show the mask of Carrie, not Carynne.


    No matter how much Verdic disbelieved and rebuked her, she had to stick to that attitude.


    She had no father. She was raised by nomadic gypsies. Her only family was Raymond.


    But Verdic did not believe her. He was convinced she was Carynne. She knew it too. But she had to continue with this lie that he wouldnt believe.


    Without Raymond here, she didnt know what else to say. She could only repeat the same thing over and over. Should she now reveal herself as Carynne?


    But was she sad now? However, Carynne wasnt sad. It was difficult to suddenly mourn her fathers death for the nth time. He had died too often. To her, the father was just a character in a book. It had been so for too long. Mourning his death felt too unnatural.


    You will fall in love, and all your hardships wille to an end.


    She was never someones child but always someones lover, enemy, or the scorned. Carynne felt more familiar with Verdic than her own father.


    What meaning did her fathers death hold for Carynne, suddenly? His death was merely another plot device to more easily gain sympathy from Raymond.


    But these men did not know the kind of woman Carynne was.


    So, they were treating her like a normal, love-struck, somewhat reckless, maybe even slightly mad teenage girl.


    Carynne looked at Lind, who was trying to soothe her. He was speaking as if he were addressing Ise.


    Lord Hare wandered in search of you, weary from sorrow, and passed away. This is not a lie. If youe downtown with us and send a telegram to the Hare estate, they will respond. Or, by tomorrow, this news will likely be published in the local newspaper. We can bring that to you.


    Carynne shook her head.


    Im not saying that youre lying. Im just saying that I am <i>not</i> the person you think I am. I am not Carynne Hare. I am Carrie. And the only person who matters to me is Lord Raymond.

 Chapter 186

    Chapter 186


    Rather, when Carynnes father was murdered by Tomst time, she felt more of a pang of regret then, realizing that his love for her mother was smaller than she had thought. This time, its hard to suddenly feel sad that her father had died again.


    It was a strange feeling. Usually, he passed away from an ailment following his businesss failure, but this time, he died because Carynne had disappeared.


    <i>So, hes someone who could die because of me.</i>


    Someone who couldnt evenmit suicide for his child had seeded in doing so when she went missing.


    Just thats how it was.


    It was the end of her feelings. The end.


    <i>Did Mother marry Father only for the sake of having a child? Or did Mother choose him for some other reason?</i>


    But, either way, it didnt seem to matter.


    Carynne repeatedly denied it.


    I dont know who that person is. Im not his daughter.


    Carynne answered calmly, without faltering.


    Youre joking.


    Mister Evans. Youre under the wrong impression.


    But no matter how calmly Carynne responded, looking at Verdics face, it was clear. He didnt believe her words. He was convinced that Carynne was Carynne.


    Youre utterly infatuated with a man.


    Please refrain from such rude remarks.


    Verdicshed out at Carynne.


    Why lie? Your father is dead. Do you not understand that?


    Miss, please look at this.


    Lind handed Carynne a rolled-up picture. Carynne took it. It was a portrait of herself. Of course, it looked exactly like her.


    It was a missing person flyer.


    She resembles me. But Im not this person.


    The more you deny it, the more youre putting yourself in a predicament. We can just bring in more people who know you.


    Whoever you bring, my answer will be the same. I am not the person named Carynne.


    Carynne answered with an expressionless face. Her continued denial drove Verdic to the edge of his sanity. Verdic grabbed Carynnes shoulders tightly.


    Mister Gentleman, it hurts.


    He was already far from being a gentleman.


    Verdic, breathing heavily, clutched Carynne.


    Your father died because of you! While youve been here, dazzled by Raymond! Every day he worried and cried until he finally hung himself! How could you even act like this.


    Carynne was speechless. And it even seemed absurd. Who was lecturing whom? What was Verdic even saying to Carynne now?


    Arent you even feeling sorry for your father? How could his daughter


    Mr. Verdic!


    If they had been alone, Verdic might have beaten Carynne. But suddenly all the servants, including those not belonging to Verdic, hade down and were watching them.


    How can a child


    <i>How can a child do such a thing to their parent?</i>


    But was he, of all people, in a position to lecture her now?


    Right now, whos supposed to judge who?


    Carynne knew Verdic well. She knew his malicious nature. He had strangled her several times before.


    Thats not all. He was inherently selfish and only interested in his own gains.


    Countless times, Lord Hare had been driven to hang himself because of Verdic, and innumerable people had died because of him. Verdic made his money through arms brokering, and she knew he deliberately stirred up conflicts in various ces.


    One of the reasons the war beyond the White Mountain Range never ceased was that there were more than a few nobles funded by him, and the reason the Saytes Barony fell into his hands was that he sold them defective seeds for thend.


    The number of people who died indirectly because of Verdic could be in the hundreds, thousands, even tens of thousands.


    Yet now, this man was questioning how she could act this way as a child to a parent why wasnt she concerned about her fathers death?


    Speak Carynne Hare.


    I am not Carynne.


    Carynne decided to continue pushing the narrative that she was Carrie. Whether he believed it or not didnt matter. Verdic would not get more out of her.


    She silently stared into space.


    And this was the best Carynne could do.


    * * *


    It seems she wont open her mouth at all.


    Lind came out from the room where Carynne was bound, shaking his head repeatedly. Verdic had to walk around the hall more than five times to calm his anger. It seemed futile to get any information about Ise from Carynne. She wouldnt even acknowledge she was Carynne and kept insisting Raymond was a good man.


    Make her admit it. By any means at all.


    Any means


    Linds voice lowered. He tried to handle things more smoothly than Verdic, but that was onlyparatively speaking. Lind was also getting fed up with Carynnes silence. He made a throat-slitting gesture, but Verdic immediately rejected it.


    No. Not that.


    Verdic retracted his words. His temperament inclined him to use violence to force the woman, who denied being Carynne, to say anything.


    But she was clearly Carynne, and Raymond might return and exploit this situation.


    I just want to kill her.


    But there were too many people involved. Keeping his own men quiet was one issue, but because he had borrowed someone elses manpower to make the job smoother was another problem.


    Mister Verdic.


    Gale, Crown Prince Gueuzes subordinate, called out to Verdic. Surprised at his sudden appearance, Verdic was a bit startled. Gale spoke to him with a frown.


    Mister Verdic, it seems it will take some more time.


    Searching the mansion, you mean? Even with all these people, do you think it makes sense that it would take this long?


    To Verdics reproachful tone, Gale nodded and then responded.


    Apologies. However, the owner of this house has yed a few tricks in each room. Nothing lethal hase up so far, but if youre suspicious of Sir Raymond, then we need to investigate even more thoroughly.


    Youre saying you think we should investigate as much as possible before he returns?


    The man looked down at Verdic as he spoke.


    Should we risk so much just based on suspicion? We werent informed that it would be this risky.


    Verdic felt rising anger but couldnt express it further.


    These men werent his own subordinates. They were lent by Crown Prince Gueuze.


    While Gueuze had lent them, if they were injured or killed, it would mean owing a debt to Gueuze. All this was based on mere suspicion, and besides, Raymond was not anymore a child Verdic could manipte at will.


    Damn.


    It was difficult to make a move. Verdic fiddled with his beard. People were watching him.


    He had to make a decision.


    So, Verdic decided.


    Then we shall stay here until Baron Raymond Saytes returns.


    Are you crazy?


    Carynne opened her mouth in disbelief. But Verdic, without looking at Carynne, spoke to the men.


    Hosting guests is the duty of a noble. We returned coincidentally and had no choice but to stay. In fact, when he returns, he should be grateful. After all, we will have taken good care of his house while hes away.


    That seems like a reasonable idea.


    Isnt it?


    Youre <i>insane.</i>


    How could he say such shameless things? Carynne looked up at Verdic with such an expression, but Verdics familiar subordinates nodded.


    Understood. What shall we do then? The original deadline was a week.


    I would appreciate it if you could ask him to extend it.


    The men nodded.


    And Carynne felt an ominous premonition.


    She had almost always been under Verdics control during this time of the year. And soon, the period when Verdic posed a danger to Carynne would return.


    Could she survive him in this iteration?


    Truly, would she be able to avoid that day?

 Chapter 187

    Chapter 187


    * * *


    Verdic had made his choice.


    Once he had decided, there was no hesitation in his actions. Verdic shamelessly nned to actually live in Raymonds mansion. Until Raymond returned, he intended to continue searching his mansion.


    Carynne was speechless, but there was nothing she could do about it. Verdic had called people in, and they were thoroughly searching the mansion. He even brought documents stamped with the royal seal to make it difficult for Raymond to object upon his return.


    This ensures that my stay here is not an issue.


    Shouldnt you consider it a breach of etiquette rather thanw?


    Well clean up afterward. If suspicions are cleared, it will be good for Baron Raymond too. And for you.


    Verdic dismissed her words.


    Carynne was incredulous, but she had no means to rebel against Verdic. And she thought it better toply rather than resist vehemently, hearing the conversation between Verdic and the other men.


    Just in case, I have to say that you shouldnty a hand on thatdy, Mister Verdic.


    Id appreciate it if youd stop entertaining unpleasant thoughts.


    Verdic retorted, and the manughed.


    Thats not what I mean. Im saying that you shouldnt leave any marks.


    And the man nced at Carynne and said,


    His Highness has a deep interest in Catherines daughter.


    Carynne sighed.


    So, her mothers leftovers also had its uses. In her past life, if Crown Prince Gueuze had shown interest in her earlier, maybe she wouldnt have suffered as much under Verdic. Verdics eyes now showed such eagerness to bring out a whip andsh Carynne multiple times, but he refrained due to being conscious of Crown Prince Gueuze.


    Whether being in the crown princes favor was good or bad was hard to judge at the moment. But now, Carynne knew his favor was precariously on the favorable side.


    Verdic couldnt touch Carynne right now. Either because Carynne might know clues about Ise, or because the crown prince was paying attention to her.


    The crown prince also couldnt abduct Carynne right now. This was because Verdic was frantically searching for Ise, and Carynne was considered a key clue to the girls disappearance. Even if the crown prince wanted to summon Carynne, Verdic was also an important cash cow for him.


    As a result, Carynne, amidst various vested interests, managed to live quietly in the mansion.


    Like her previous life, peace hade even though she was under the same roof as her enemy.


    * * *


    Miss, wake up. Your meal is ready.


    Thank you. But I am a maid, too. You dont need to do this.


    Carynne rubbed her eyes and got up. Ironically, Verdic had even assigned a maid to her. Verdic seemed to have decided to lure her with kindness since whipping didnt work.


    As Carynne got up, another maid came with a basin so she could wash her face, and yet another followed with a tray of food.


    Would you like to eat in bed?


    Yes.


    Carynne gestured from her reclined position. She remembered saying she was also a maid, but since it was a lie no one believed anyway, she decided it was better to indulge in a bit moreziness.


    Would you prefer tea, milk, or water?


    Lets start with milk, and please also brew some tea. Ill have milk tea after my meal.


    Understood.


    She looked down at the meal and chuckled softly.


    It wasnt bad. In fact, it was quite good. The simrity to her past life amused her.


    The breakfast consisted of thick pancakes drenched in maple syrup, blueberry scones, and toast topped with fruit.


    I might gain weight.


    But Verdics maids said nothing. Carynne smiled bitterly as she picked up the cutlery and began to eat slowly. The taste was indeed good, and she was satisfied with it.


    * * *


    What are these clothes for?


    We thought these would suit you, Miss Carynne.


    My name is not Carynne. Its Carrie.


    My apologies, Miss Carrie.


    Trying to test the waters, Carynne thought. She looked at the maid and then at the clothes.


    Ironically, the dress was a sky-blue one, simr to what Ise used to wear. It was certainly luxurious and fitted her perfectly. But dressing her in such clothes was either Verdics or the maids choicea rather distasteful inclination.


    * * *


    Carynne lounged in the garden, sipping orange juice.


    Verdic was diligently searching for traces of Ise, and whenever Carynne passed by, he tried to engage her in conversation about Ise. It seemed he had changed tactics, now attempting to appease and awaken guilt in Carynne.


    But Carynne was much too tired to feel any semnce of guilt towards Verdic. The only person she felt any guilt towards was Raymond.


    Therefore, Carynne simply enjoyed the various conveniences provided by Verdic to the fullest.


    I wish theres some ice in this.


    Im sorry, Miss. Its a bit difficult to bring ice all the way here.


    Thats alright.


    We shall try our best to amodate.


    The maids spoke cautiously and began to squeeze more juice from oranges taken from the cold stream.


    And the bird you broughtst time flew away. Could you let me know if you find a new canary?


    Yes, Miss.


    Carynneughed.


    I told you, dont call me Miss. Im a maid just like you.


    Would you prefer a red canary?


    I like yellow ones. Or rather, gold.


    Yes, understood, Miss.


    I told you, Im a maid.


    Sarcasmced her tone.


    This conversation would also reach Verdic. Carynne smirked, picking up the book she was holding. Cold revenge was a very tasty thing, and it was good for killing time.


    * * *


    What is this?


    These are gold coins you will receive if you cooperate with me.


    Verdic sat Carynne down and spoke in a serious tone from across from her.


    Baron Raymond Saytes is definitely hiding something.


    Youre mistaken. There must be some misunderstanding.


    Dont say another word. If you want me to stay rational.


    It seemed like too insincere a lie.


    Carynne looked down. She knew it herself. She had been continually telling lies even she herself didnt believe. If Carynne hadnt been Verdics long-time enemy, in such a situation, she might have divulged at least a little of what she knew. Verdic had people clean daily, provided meals, and even brought various jewelry for her.


    Carynne hadnt touched the jewels, but she could tell Verdic was desperate in trying to persuade her. If she really were an amnesiac Carynne, a simple girl who fell for Raymond and became his aplice, she might have already sumbed.


    Raymond Saytes was my daughters fianc. And then one day she disappeared Thest ce she was seen was with Raymonds subordinate.


    And my daughters hair was sent to me in a parcel. It was sent by someone from this region.


    How could Verdic so faithfully move ording to Raymonds n?


    Verdic was persistent, had initiative, and moved more flexibly than expected.


    I ask for your sympathy Your father truly took his own life. That you have no concern about his demise I just dont understand.


    Every night, I dream of my daughter returning. Her birthday passed recently, and whilest year I pondered what gift to give her, this year I couldnt think of anything Why.


    Verdics voice trailed off.


    I wish to find any clue. Anything at all, please.


    And Carynne realized that his misery was also a gift Raymond had given her.


    Ah.


    <i>Look at Verdic.</i>


    <i>Killing him would be too easy a revenge. We will carry out your revenge in the most fitting way.</i>


    Carynne smiled bitterly.


    Raymond was truly a man who would do anything for Carynne.


    And as she had an obligation to dly ept the gifts he gave her, she slowly opened her mouth.


    I dont think I can help you, Mister Verdic Evans.


    Tears slowly rolled down Verdics eyes.


    Carynne stood up and turned to open the door.


    Wait!


    Ill take my leave now.


    Verdic called out to Carynne.


    Ill give you the entire budget for a years business investment!


    After I die, Ill make you my heiress! How about that? Your father has died, so Ill make you my adopted daughter! If you just find If you just help me find my daughter!

 Chapter 188

    Chapter 188


    Carynne sighed.


    So, whats the point of bing his daughter? And there was no chance Ise was still alive. Her death was merely for Carynnes sake.


    Ill pretend I didnt hear that.


    Carynne Hare!


    Thud.


    Verdic stood up from his seat. Once again, persuading Carynne was impossible. Clues were scarce within this house. The subordinates of Crown Prince Gueuze grew increasinglyckadaisical, and his own men feared active involvement lest they get hurt.


    What should he do.


    Where could Ise be at this moment? Was she still alive? And if shes alive, was she suffering?


    If only she hadnt died. If only she was still alive


    Verdic bowed his head, tears streaming down.


    He would find his daughter.


    No matter what state she was in.


    * * *


    Miss, heres the newspaper you requested.


    Bring it here. Is it from the capital?


    Yes.


    Carynne received the newspaper from the maid.


    Lately, Carynne felt truly alive. Being alone with Raymond had its romantic moments, but she had to live a life while mingling with others. Solitude wasnt enough.


    The conveniences provided by Verdic made her feel more human.


    Meals, cleaning, entertainment. Verdic even provided her with the pleasure of revenge! Carynne realized anew how suffocatingly she had lived until now.


    Hmm


    The newspaper was filled with all sorts of stories.


    The world kept turning without Carynne. The world she had been in was far too narrow. Carynne felt a tinge of regret for once thinking this world was just a romance novel. If one set out to explore, the world was this vast.


    The world was overflowing with sorrow, tragedy, andedy. Carynne first devoured the cultural section, her favorite.


    But today was just like the today she had seen before, and she quickly lost interest. News she had already read wasnt exciting.


    Carynne flipped through the pages, skimming the news quickly.


    <i>Father.</i>


    She wondered if her fathers death might be mentioned, but the death of a rural lord wasnt significant enough. Maybe in a local paper, but not in one published in the capital. His funeral was already over, so it was even less likely to be mentioned now.


    But Carynne couldnt take her eyes off the obituary section.


    It wasnt the person she was thinking of.


    But at this time, someone who shouldnt have died was dead.


    <b>[ The Demise of Prince Lewis ]</b>


    Why did Prince Lewis die?


    Carynne was taken aback.


    Prince Lewis wasnt supposed to die at this time. Its true that on Carynnes 117th yearher 100th loopPrince Lewis had died, but usually, that boy would survive and live a longer life.


    Both Crown Prince Gueuze and Prince Lewis were people who lived longer than Carynne did until her 116th yearor, the 99th iteration. Only the 100th loop was an exception.


    At the age of 117, as Carynne began tomit murders, events started to go awry, and the confrontation between Crown Prince Gueuze and Prince Lewis intensified. Eventually, Prince Lewis was killed by his own father. However, that was a peculiar and unprecedented event, something that only happened when Carynne was 117 years old.


    Why?


    Carynne read the newspaper frantically. Something she hadnt anticipated had happened. And it wasnt a pleasant event. Why did Prince Lewis die?


    <b>[ In the early morning of the 7th of the month, Prince Lewis was critically injured by a gunman during a street parade and was rushed to the hospital. However, he passed away on the 17th, entering Gods embrace. ]</b>


    Why?


    Carynne couldnt understand. It was entirely normal for Prince Lewis to participate in a street parade at this time. It was amon urrence Carynne wouldnt even need to wrack her head for.


    The boy would just smile and wave at people on the street. There was no reason for him to die young.


    Except for one person.


    His father, Crown Prince Gueuze.


    Crown Prince Gueuze hated his son. In front of Carynnes very eyes, he had killed his own child. But, again, the events that transpired when she was 117 years old were born out of very special circumstances.


    Now, Carynne was confined to the mansion. She knew this kind of life. She had such experiences. Even then, living modestly in her home, tended to by Nancy and other maids, she could still be aware of high societys movements. Even then, Prince Lewis had lived till the end.


    So, why did Prince Lewis die this time?


    Thinking about it, Carynne felt she might know the reason.


    Carynne didnt know the world a year ahead. Verdic was a financial backer for Crown Prince Gueuze. However, he also funded nobles who werent on good terms with the crown prince and tried to build connections with them. But he didnt pay much attention to Prince Lewis.


    After all, Crown Prince Gueuze had no intention of making Prince Lewis king.


    His son was merely apetitor for the thronehe did not consider him his child. Carynne realized it then. And Verdic knew of the crown princes intentions.


    He might not have known when, but someday Prince Lewis would die, and there was no need to invest much in that young boy


    But at the same time, Carynne felt she understood why that boy, the supposed future king who admired Raymond, had died.


    If only she had been there, Prince Lewis would have lived.


    At least this year, that boy wasnt meant to die.


    The death of Prince Lewis was an event that only urred when Carynne, at the age of 117, had resolved tomit murders. Even when Carynne was confined to the mansion like this, the boy was still alive.


    He was supposed to live.


    But this time, he died.


    Perhaps because not only Carynne but also Raymond had returned to the past.


    Raymond being tied to Carynne had undoubtedly altered the course of events. And apart from that, he had experienced all sorts of situations that Carynne did not know. It was impossible that he hadnt foreseen the event of Prince Lewiss death.


    Even if the boy, Prince Lewis, didnt matter to him.


    The only thing that was important to him was Carynne.


    Did you know about Prince Lewiss death?


    Yes, Miss. It was about ten days ago


    You knew?


    Yes it was in the newspaper. Why do you ask?


    No, its nothing.


    Carynne asked the maid, but the maid simply answered calmly. Carynne wanted to ask how she could be soposed, but she couldnt. The answer was obvious. Verdic didnt consider Prince Lewis as important as Crown Prince Gueuze.


    It just saddens me that a young child died.


    Carynne had no choice but to reply like that. She worried her voice might crack, but it came out perfectly normal. It was a relief. Carynne then turned the page of the newspaper.


    This was the reaction of a normal person.


    Whether Prince Lewis died or Crown Prince Gueuze lived, it was none of her business. It was just news in the newspaper. A story from another world.


    Theres just one thing that mattered to heronly one person important to her.


    The only thing that mattered was Raymond and herself.


    Im thirsty. Could you bring me some water?


    Yes, Miss.


    * * *


    Should I call you Sir Raymond, or Baron Raymond now?


    Marquis Penceir asked Raymond in a strained voice.


    Since Ill officially be appointed as the household head tomorrow, Baron is fine, Marquis Penceir.


    I see. Youll be attending the funeral and then heading down there. It might be better for you to stay down there for a while. The situation isplicated right now.


    Yes.


    Raymond responded briefly. His voice didnt contain much energy. He was about to receive a barony and a major military distinction, but the mood was too somber.


    The marquiss nephewthe future kinghad died. Was he also grieving?


    Marquis Penceir sighed.


    Prince Lewis had died suddenly. Someone had killed him. The announcement of his death was dyed for an appropriate time, but Prince Lewis had died instantly at the scene.


    I truly loathe my cousin.


    Marquis Penceirs lips twitched before they were then closed. His thin lips quivered. He turned his head towards the window.


    It waste summer. The sound of crickets and chirping birds was at its peak, but the one who should have died lived, and the one who should have lived died.


    It was a day far too beautiful for someone to die.

 Chapter 189

    Chapter 189


    Prince Lewis is dead.


    Now, the sole heir to the throne is Crown Prince Gueuze.


    However, Marquis Penceir had no intention of letting him ascend to the throne. It was clear who had killed Prince Lewis.


    All sorts of people were striving to smoothly pass the throne to him. The current king, even past his nies, was forcibly clinging to his crown, and the nobility were still interacting with the young Prince Lewis.


    But with the young princes death, all ns were dashed.


    With the trained king dead, they must now ept Crown Prince Gueuze as their king. But Marquis Penceir was unwilling.


    He needed to meet the old king.


    It seems a bloody struggle will ensue.


    .


    Raymond, for now, you should stay home. I will call you when the timees.


    Do you not need my help now?


    Raymonds green eyes gleamed in the sunset. He was known to be an excellent marksman. Marquis Penceir shook his head. Being too well-known meant his presence here might raise suspicions.


    Everyone knows you and Prince Lewis were close, so your presence in the capital now is definitely not good.


    I really wish to meet His Highness the Crown Prince Gueuze.


    Marquis Penceir shook his head again. If Raymond met Crown Prince Gueuze and would kill him, it would spark another conflict.


    I understand how you must be feeling. You probably want to take revenge immediately.


    But now is not the time.


    Go down and perhaps conduct your brothers funeral. Live quietly as if youre indifferent to everything.


    Raymond was silent for a long time, as if he couldnt possibly rise.


    I will surely call you again. But not now. I also have preparations to make.


    Understood.


    And Marquis Penceir felt he knew who the culprit was. In fact, there could be no one else but one.


    Marquis Penceir clenched his fist. Prince Lewis was his king and his nephew. Marquis Penceir had no intention of sitting by and watching Crown Prince Gueuze ascend to the throne.


    Then, Ill see you next time, Marquis Penceir.


    Yes, Ill send a contribution for your brothers funeral.


    Thank you.


    Raymond bowed his head and left. His stern face was worrisome.


    <i>Poor fellow.</i>


    Marquis Penceir watched the younger mans back and thought so.


    Despite the blessings given to him in terms of abilities, that young man had always been unlucky. He lost his parents early and was forced into an engagement with a debtors daughter. Then, his fiance disappeared, and now the only remaining familyhis older brotherhad died, too.


    And now, the Marquis felt a tightening in his chest. The young prince he had cherished more than anyone, the boy who looked up to Raymond with eyes of admiration, had died.


    Crown Prince Gueuze must pay for his crimes.


    * * *


    Raymond closed the door of the Marquiss chambers.


    <i>Haa.</i>


    Prince Lewis was dead.


    Marquis Penceir was burning with intense vengeance towards Crown Prince Gueuze. Now that Prince Lewis was dead, the next in line for session was Marquis Penceir. Until now, the marquis had been working to ensure the throne would rightly go to Lewis, but things would be different now.


    The real battle for the throne henceforth begins. Crown Prince Gueuze will have to put all his effort into suppressing Marquis Penceir. At least for a year, he wont even have time to think about women.


    Are you the famed Sir Raymond Saytes?


    Is it true that you can take down a hundred men all alone?


    The voice of the boy who used to look up to him seemed to echo, but he shook his head. That wasnt what mattered. The difort settling in his chest was ignorable. The only important thing was one person.


    Ah, the boutique should be closed by now. Ill probably have to leave the day after tomorrow.


    He looked up at the sky. The sun was setting.


    A burning sky appeared. The edges of the blood-red sky were gradually turning purple, weing the night. It reminded him of the only person who mattered to him, the one he loved.


    The sunset, like your hair. The purple sky, like your eyes. The moon, like your fair features Hmm, is this expression too cheesy? Im not sure whats appropriate. But I suppose I should try it. If its too cheesy, I can use it as a joke.


    Raymondughed.


    Marquis Penceir will openly console Crown Prince Gueuze in his grief.


    Crown Prince Gueuze will have to devote all his mind to dealing with Marquis Penceir.


    And Verdic will do everything to protect Carynne, who he believes holds clues to Ise.


    I need to get some fitted clothes before going back.


    I hope Im not toote and that she wont be angry. But it should be fine, right?


    Raymond picked up his bag. It was quite heavy, but not beyond his ability to carry. Raymond looked down at the bag and smiled.


    It will be fine. Carynne will love me no matter what.


    She will be safe till then. Raymond stepped forward lightly.


    Only one person mattered.


    That was enough.


    * * *


    Raymond had returned.


    His arrival was quite sudden.


    Since Raymond hadnt specified his return date, everyone scrambling on the day of his return was an inevitable sequence.


    The first to greet him was Verdic.


    Alerted by the distant sound of horse hooves, Verdic sprang up from his bed and hurried to the door faster than any servant, desperate for any news.


    Raymond Saytes.


    It was him. Verdic felt a wave of detion.


    Raymond Saytes had finallye back to his home. Inevitable, yet Verdics heart was heavy with a sense of loss.


    Not yet I havent found anything yet.


    The thought gnawed at him.


    Time had flown much too swiftly. Despite his exhaustive search, no evidence surfaced, and Carynne had remained as tight-lipped as ever. He couldnty a finger on her, and his pleas for her sympathy were in vain.


    Time had slipped through his fingers, and now, Raymond had returned.


    Why are you here? Raymond asked.


    His Highness Crown Prince Gueuze wrote to me, sympathizing with my situation.


    Verdic spoke through clenched teeth. Raymond simply raised an eyebrow and let out augh, one that seemed to mock the entire situation.


    I see. Have you been well?


    How can I be, when I havent found my daughter?


    Thats unfortunate.


    Raymonds casual manner irked Verdic further as he bypassed him, carrying arge bag, heading inside his own home.


    G-Goodness.


    LLord Raymond.


    Verdics servants and maids scrambled to their feet and dashed out. Raymond chuckleda cold, dispassionate soundas he surveyed the disheveled lineup.


    He then turned to Verdic.


    Ah, Mister Verdic Evans Inviting so many people into my home during my absence, youve been rather presumptuous.


    Verdics face flushed then paled. Interactions with Carynne had taught him to control his anger better, perhaps even to ept defeat more readily.


    Verdic spoke again, more slowly this time.


    I just wanted your maid to have somefort.


    Carrie is merely a maid. For what reason have you gone to this extent?


    Shes Carynne Hare.


    No, she is not.


    Raymond countered almost yfully, then continued upstairs, still carrying his bag. ncing down at Verdic, he remarked,


    Ill overlook your impudence this time, for Crown Prince Gueuzes sake.


    Raymonds expression turned nk.


    But Id appreciate it if youd leave soon.


    What do you know about Ise? What have you done?


    I know nothing of it.


    His tone was icy.


    And then he moved on, disappearing down the corridor to his room, leaving Verdics gaze behind.


    Verdic brought a hand to his forehead.


    God damn it!

 Chapter 190

    Chapter 190


    A voice as gentle as a dream floated through the air.


    And something warm touched her face.


    Carynne, eyes closed, weed the sensation. Theres only one person who would awaken her this way. Raymond always came with a warm towel to gently cleanse her face, slowly, tenderly.


    Have you returned?


    Yes, Carynne. Im back.


    But I thought Im Carrie?


    Thats only when Mister Verdic is around.


    Raymonds eyes crinkled into a smile. Her vision still blurry, Carynne smiled back towards the twinkling green hue of his eyes.


    Raymonds hair was a mess, falling forward, making him look more like a boy than a soldier.


    <i>A boy. My boy.</i> Truthfully, he always smiled like that when in love. After all the memories resurfaced, his smile always seemed tinged with fatigue, aging him slightly. Time had etched into hisughter.


    But now, his face seemed more rxed than ever. Carynne smiled anew at this unexpected joy.


    Was your trip sessful?


    Yes. Theres no need for me to leave anymore. Until that day Mmh.


    Thats good.


    Carynne pulls Raymond closer, initiating a passionate kiss.


    * * *


    When will Mister Verdic Evans leave?


    Some timeter, while sitting on the bed now, Carynne asked Raymond, whos lying down.


    He answered in a slightly drowsy voice.


    Hell be leaving soon.


    That day is not far off


    Carynnes anxiety was slowly creeping in, but Raymond sat up and embraced her from behind. Her heart fluttered against him.


    Holding Carynne close, Raymond spoke.


    Theres no need to be afraid.


    I want to believe that But honestly, my situation is a bit you know?


    Carynne couldnt help but be doubtful.


    Its the first time Raymond has all the memories, and she desperately hoped this would be the end.


    Yet the situation, with both Verdic and Raymond under one roof, was unnervingly precarious.


    Verdic never failed toe swinging an axe to sever Carynnes neck on that day.


    The way things are going, its almost too perfect for a tragic end at Verdics hand.


    To die at Verdics hand now would be too fitting.


    It was all but confirmed that Raymond was guilty of killing Ise, and Carynne, under the flimsy alias of Carrie, seemed to be his aplice. Further, they were also lovers. For Verdic, not killing Carynne would seem to be more of a challenge.


    Carynne fidgeted with her fingers, fearing this time too, she might die. She hoped for a quick end by Verdics axe.


    Does it seem that way?


    After a moment of silence, Raymond replies.


    Yes, it does. Anyway, you neednt worry about Verdic Evans anymore. And hell be leaving soon.


    I find it hard to believe What did you do?


    Carynne, men have their secrets.


    His tone is solemn yet teasing.


    Not funny.


    Carynne pinches Raymonds nose in response.


    Ouch.


    Seriously, its not funny. Anyway, thanks to your antics, things have beenfortable. Verdics maids were quite amodating. And hes surprisingly simple in some ways.


    What did he offer you?


    The usual stuff money, adoption, clothes, foodall that jazz.


    You mustve had a good time.


    Yes.


    Too good, in fact.


    Its astonishing how devoid of guilt she was, exploiting the grief of a parent whos lost their child. Eating his food, ordering his maids around, not feeling sorry but incrediblyfortable. Really.


    I had a great time.


    Isnt it better when I do things alone?


    Carynne shakes her head vehemently.


    Thats not true.


    And she leans heavily against Raymond, who, feeling her weight, reclines back onto the bed. Carynne rests her head on his chest and continues speaking.


    Indeed, more people are better.


    Is that so?


    Yes. Even if Baron Raymond works hard alone, he cant do the work of one hundred people by himself. For convenience, its definitely necessary to have servants.


    After that day, well hire more.


    Be sure of it.


    Yes. Carynne, by the way, I bought some clothes for you. Let me just unpack them and show you.


    Okay.


    Raymond stood up, and after returning from his room, he presented Carynne with the clothes.


    These designs were from the boutique that Carynne had mentioned to him. However, there was an issue.


    Although the material and patterns she had described were used, and the fabric was luxurious with clean stitching indicative of first-ss craftsmanship, the design was the problem.


    The clothes were entirely different from Carynnes usual style, and she wasnt keen on them. Seeing Carynnes displeased reaction, Raymond hurriedly rified.


    But this will be very fashionableter.


    Really?


    Yes.


    Carynne wasnt convinced, but she considered herck of knowledge about the future. Not knowing what might be in vogueter, she thought it wise to consider his opinion. Perhaps in about five years, it could be leading the trend. Then wouldnt she be a trendsetter?


    However, after putting on the clothes and looking in the mirror, Carynne couldnt suppress her sinking tone of voice.


    It was an overly simplistic design. Not even as a maid had she worn a dress without a single frill. Nor was it a design that entuated her figure. To Carynne, it didnt even qualify as clothing. The dress revealed too much of her calves as well.


    Not even streetwalkers wore such designs. It was worse than undergarments. It neither exposed her chest nor tightly wrapped her upper body, but tantly disyed her legs. It felt perversely revealing.


    Are you sure thisll be fashionableter on?


    Yes, its not only active but its simple elegance is very appealing. Its also practical for the summer. People arent wearing it yet, but soon


    Raymond had averted his eyes as Carynnes voice soured.


    How soon are we talking about here?


    About twenty years


    Carynne despaired for the future generation. She knew herself to be not overly upright and full of morals. However, she still held the shame instilled by society and religionthe decency not to expose oneself sexually to others. Exposing ones legs could directly suggest ones reproductive parts. How could women of the future wear such revealing clothes without shame?


    Carynne sighed.


    How can such clothing be fashionable


    Carynne, think about it. You havent seen the future yet, but such clothing will undoubtedly make women morefortable.


    You didnt even bring the corset I asked for


    Carynne shook her head at the bundle devoid of a corset.


    She had no corset, and the dresscked any bustle, so nothing at all enhanced her figure. Overall, it was dreadful.


    But Raymond, even as he looked away, continued to advocate for his choice.


    Corsets will soon go out of fashion and, more importantly, theyre not good for the body.


    Uh as I said that will happen.


    Carynne, not wishing to be a trendsetter of two decades prior, quietly took off the dress. Raymond nced at her then fell silent.


    From now on just buy what I ask for. Understood?


    Yes, Carynne.


    And acknowledge that you cant do it all on your own.


    Yes.


    Carynne sighed deeply.


    Even if the future would truly, finallye to her, she firmly resolved to never wear such clothes.

 Chapter 191 | 04. Wouldn’t it be enough?

    Chapter 191 | 04. Wouldn��t it be enough?


    That woman. Is she not Carynne?


    Thats right. This is Carrie, not Carynne. I met her by chance in the forest, and weve been cohabiting ever since.


    And youre saying theres no one to prove Carries past as she has no family.


    Her family has departed from the world, so what can we do?


    They were in front of the dinner table, having a meal, yet for everyone around them it felt like theyre about to choke from this intense pressure.


    Verdic and Raymonds voices were firm, unrelenting.


    Carynne watched them while sipping her water. The cold water infused with floating lemon slices was refreshing.


    Verdics voice had remarkable projection. It didnt tire easily.


    Look at the portrait! That woman has the exact same appearance!


    Verdic pointed usingly at Carynne, his voice even rougherpared to when he was addressing Raymond.


    Are you still going to deny it despite that woman being exactly identical to Carynne? And can you prove that this woman existed before the day Carynne went missing?


    Why should I prove anything to you?


    Carynne watched Verdics face contorting as Raymond replied as such. It seemed like Raymond was also sticking with the Carrie pseudonym.


    And to add, this meal is fine. However, Mister Verdic, judging by the freshness of the meat, it seems youve used my hunting grounds. Thats quite troubling.


    The food youre eating right now has been prepared by <i>my</i> chef. What are you trying to say?


    Then I shall stop eating, and you may leave.


    So immature


    However, Raymonds petty and illogical sarcasm seemed to have affected Verdic greatly. The mans face wentpletely red with anger.


    Breathing heavily, he struggled to respond.


    Then, Raymond added something unexpected.


    Fine.


    What?


    Mister Verdic Evans. I will grant you permission to investigate my domains postal service.


    Now, of all times?


    Carynnes eyes went wide. The permission Raymond was granting was clearly just bait. There was no real intel to find there.


    By now, Verdic should know that he wouldnt be able to glean anything from it.


    But this house, I still


    Still what?


    When Raymond nonchntly replied, Carynne realized what he was purposely doing.


    He was saying, Youve already illegally searched through everything yet found nothing. Might as well let you finish your quaint little investigation, yes?


    Verdic could not object to Raymond granting him permission to investigate.


    No. Its nothing. Thank you.


    Verdic had no choice but to say that. He wanted to say I still havent thoroughly searched this house yet, but thats not something you say in front of the house ownerespecially towards a nobleman.


    Verdic swallowed his curses.


    Seeing Raymond so readily agree to investigate the cargo, it was clear that any and all clues had likely vanished. Verdic had already covertly investigated using bribes through Lind, but no substantial clues were found.


    The only thing known was the area from which his daughters hair was sent, but that was insufficient to link to Raymond.


    Verdic needed to search <i>this</i> house more than he needed the investigation rights for the postal service.


    And he needed information from that woman.


    But Raymond had already returned.


    Verdic swallowed a groan. Clues seemed to tantalizingly appear, only to vanish. He couldnt cleanly forget about it all, even if he tried.


    Verdic felt tortured by hope.


    The well-cooked meal before him was going cold. Verdic realized he was exhausted from grief and fatigue.


    Wrestling with Raymond and Carynne for answers was draining, and the situation with Crown Prince Gueuze had grown increasinglyplex. Moreover, the business matters he had put off were now relentlessly demanding his attention.


    Regardless, Raymond casually tapped his fingers on the table, addressing Verdic.


    Please, finish your meal.


    Verdic lowered his head to his te. Carynne and Raymond slowly finished their meal, watching the anguished man.


    And in the end, Carynne had a stomachache.


    * * *


    Mister Verdic.


    What is it?


    Verdic looked at the subordinate of Crown Prince Gueuze who hade to him. They were useless, only squandering money. Verdic disliked both the crown prince and his menbut the crown prince was the future king.


    You must be aware that Prince Lewis recently passed away.


    I am well aware.


    Prince Lewis died young. Verdic had anticipated the boys death.


    While the current king and young nobles bet on Prince Lewis surpassing Crown Prince Gueuze to be king, Verdic saw it as an impossible feat.


    Crown Prince Gueuze had perverse tendencies and didnt shy away from gambling or drugs, but such traits weremon among the nobility and royalty. Many who came to Verdic shamelessly exposed their dark sides. Dealing with them, Verdic often felt like he was facing monsters.


    He was just another piece in their games, a mere bag of money. Thats how they treated him.


    This made Verdic cautious in dealing with people. Many nobles who despised him in public would send letters asking for loans. And despite being drug-addled, Crown Prince Gueuze was surprisingly healthy.


    He was in his prime, virile, and thews regarding royal session were extremely hard to change. It was unrealistic for the current, ailing king to amend them.


    That old king clung to power with a near-delusional stubbornness, but changing the future set for Crown Prince Gueuze was impossible.


    Verdic had thus bet on Crown Prince Gueuze.


    He provided women, money, and services to the crown prince, asionally making deliberate requests. More often than not, these efforts were of little help, but it was necessary to create opportunities for the crown prince to unt his superiority.


    Crown Prince Gueuze was young, healthy, and killed only those whose deaths wouldnt cause much trouble.


    His cruel and bizarre tendencies didnt significantly concern Verdic. The crown prince was the most likely candidate for the future king, and it made sense to align with that future. Taking unnecessary risks was out of the question.


    And his choices proved to be right.


    In the end, the crown prince killed his own son.


    Should I offer my condolences or congrattions to him?


    Tears by day, congrattions by night, please.


    Verdic snorted in derision.


    As the funeral is likely to be a simple affair, I presume theres no need to attend?


    Yes, but he has sent a messenger desiring a congrattory gift.


    Tell him Ill sponsor the exhibition he ns to organize.


    Understood.


    As someone who deeply loved his child, Verdic couldntprehend Crown Prince Gueuze. But then, understanding the crown prince was likely impossible for most people.


    Verdic sighed, penning a letter to his estate.


    The crown prince nned to inaugurate a world exhibition immediately after the funeral. Naturally, a significant portion of the funding was expected toe from Verdic. He felt a headacheing on, thinking of ways to minimize losses.


    And one more thing.


    Whenever those words were spoken, it rarely boded well. Verdic looked at the messenger.


    His Highness wishes to see the woman presumed to be Carynne Hare.


    This isnt the time for that.


    He had just killed his son, yet Marquis Penceir remained a formidable adversary. The marquis had defended the borders for many years,manding a substantial military force.


    He believes it might assist in your confirmation.


    But that woman is currently with Baron Raymond Saytes. And since hes formally retired from the military, extracting her from him wont be easy.


    His Highness isnt demanding immediate action. He mentioned that things might be settled by next spring.

 Chapter 192

    Chapter 192


    Quite confident, isnt he.


    Even though Crown Prince Gueuze was the primary heir, the king had not yet passed the throne to his son. Nheless, the crown prince was somewhat popr among the people who were unaware of his true nature.


    Rather, his drug use and drunkenness, along with rumors of his devastation over the death of his first love, oddly endeared him to the public. The current king was under pressure for not relinquishing the throne to his first son.


    With Prince Lewiss death, the king would have to make a decision even more swiftly.


    Verdic scratched his head, pondering how to hand over Carynne. Dozens of methods and schemes crossed his mind, most requiring considerable time.


    Its difficult at the moment.


    Yes, Ill convey that. And


    The man hesitated again, causing Verdic further unease.


    * * *


    As Raymond had predicted, Verdic couldnt stay much longer.


    After hearing the news, Verdic slumped down on the spot.


    He had clung onto hope until the very bitter end. It was thest thing he wanted to hear.


    He cursed himself for wishing he had no hope just moments ago. He should have acted differently. He should not have just searched this house. He should not have focused on the postal service. He should have gone elsewhere.


    A body presumed to be Ise Evans has been found.


    And the location was far removed from this ce.


    * * *


    Now, only the two of them remained.


    Verdic left immediately upon hearing that a body presumed to be Ise was found, not even bidding them farewell.


    Raymond.


    Yes?


    Did you know that Verdic Evans would leave soon because of the news about Ise?


    Yes, I did.


    Carynne looked up at Raymond. He seemed slightly thinner, but his face still bore an unchanged smile.


    The look he gave her was always that of a young man in love.


    Carynne smiled back, grateful for everything this man had done for her.


    If she felt pity for Verdic, it would have been the most bothersome luxury in the world.


    What had <i>he</i> been doing all this time?


    To her, the people around her seemed like characters moving on paper.


    But now, they felt like wandering ghosts.


    And most importantly, as her love for Raymond grew, the guilt that had been gnawing at her slowly rose to the surface. It engulfed her like water.


    Carynne, you dont look well.


    Its nothing Im fine.


    Is something bothering you?


    Raymond asked. He seemed to have lost sleep by now. But Carynne justy facing him.


    I wish you would just tell me. You never say everything either.


    If you want I will tell you.


    Raymond hesitated in his response. But Carynne didnt want to trouble him. She just reached out and gently swept his disheveled hair back. She already had an inkling of the truths he held close.


    No matter what Raymond did, who he killed, or who he made to suffer, its all for her.


    Carynne found this thought no longer troubling. The guilt, love, and everything she felt, Raymond alone was enough.


    Raymond didnt need to feel guilty for her.


    But <i>she</i> had to.


    Because <i>she</i> was the one who drew him into this.


    Its not that. Its just I feel apologetic.


    You dont need to feel that way for me.


    <i>But its because of me that you fell to my side.</i>


    Carynne couldnt speak.


    It was undoubtedly her choice that brought Raymond into this paper world.


    She dragged him down here with her.


    Thats why Carynne felt breathless whenever she looked at Raymond.


    * * *


    And then, that day arrived.


    * * *


    Within just two days, Verdic arrived at the capital. He didnt know how fast the carriage had traveled.


    For two days, he couldnt utter a word. Stepping out of the carriage, he was greeted with, Youve arrived, and led inside. Verdic, trembling, followed into the interior.


    He was taken to a morgue. Initially, Verdic almost protested, thinking he was in the wrong ce. But seeing Inspector Albert standing rigidly, he approached closer.


    His hand shaking, Verdic reached for the cloth covering the body. He needed to confirm, but feared to do so. Yet, it was necessary.


    Verdic pulled back the cloth and looked down.


    Ise.


    The body inside was unmistakably not that of a living person. Nor did it seem like a typical corpse.


    For a long while, he couldnt say anything. It looked more like a decorative piece. A man from behind spoke.


    Wepared it with the hair you provided earlier, and the bodys height and physique closely resemble your missing daughter.


    But that was it.


    Verdic wanted to immediately deny, saying This is not my daughter.


    However his mind, gone cold, couldnt simply reject reality.


    Nothing else?


    Thats why we need your confirmation, Mister Evans.


    It looked more ghastly than dreadful.


    Most of the corpse was preserved like a doll. It appeared more like a doll made of human parts than a person.


    The head was shaved, and a red wig was ced on it. A crown adorned the wig. The face was concealed with a mask. The hands were so intricately arranged, making it difficult to tell if they were real or a part of a doll.


    The hair was cut short, but we were able to do a color match with the hair left for securing the wig.


    My daughter wouldnt wear such clothes.


    The perpetrator must have dressed her.


    The body wore a slightly outdated dress. Theck of any decaying odor suggested it had been embalmed. A mask covered the face. Verdic reached out, but Inspector Albert stopped him.


    Its better not to take it off.


    How can I confirm without seeing?


    The face had already skeletonized.


    What about the hands, still intact?


    They had been surgically removed.


    Verdic had to think.


    <i>I can recognize my daughter by her hair!</i>


    He wanted to shout, confident he could recognize her just by her hair.


    But could he, really?


    Verdic was uncertain. Acknowledging the body would be easier, but he struggled to ept that the corpse in front of him was truly his daughter Ise.


    What if the hair in the parcel wasnt Ises, but just simr? Could he be certain his memory was urate? Was he just convincing himself because he wanted to believe? Verdic couldnt be sure. Yet, he longed to make a decision, right or wrong.


    Inspector Albert spoke.


    The skin the moles or scars on it are mostly intact. Mister Verdic, can you recall any distinctive features on your daughters body?


    Im not sure.


    Verdic answered with difficulty.


    He couldnt be certain if it was Ise.


    The body Verdic sighed. How could he know the details of his grown daughters body? He had rushed here, but such knowledge was likely more familiar to Ises maid. The girls body before him, too altered from the living Ise he remembered, left Verdic unsure.


    Verdic lifted the corpses hand. It was frigid, no longer resembling a human hand. Nor did it feel like flesh.


    Drained of blood, dried, and powdered, it was difficult to recognize its true nature.


    I should send a telegram to the mansion to summon her maid.


    Yes. Mister Verdic, will you stay in the capital for now?


    I will.


    Verdic answered briefly and adjusted his hat.


    What will you do, sir?


    Ill stay in my townhouse in the capital. And theres much to prepare.


    Verdic clenched his teeth.


    He had been so nervous before arriving, but now, seeing the body, he felt oddlyposed.


    He knew too little now, even uncertain if the corpse was his daughter. Verdic acknowledged anew his shorings as a father. The misery and bitterness only made his mind colder.


    One thing became clear.


    This corpse was the doing of Crown Prince Gueuze.

 Chapter 193

    Chapter 193


    Crown Prince Gueuze was deeply financially entangled with Verdic Evans. The crown prince required more flexible funds than other nobles, and Verdic had no reason to refuse him. Gueuze, despite his ws, was exactly the type of man Verdic appreciated.


    Gueuze had loanedrge sums of money from Verdic, helping him pass numerous documents andws. With the current king aging, much authority alreadyy with Gueuze. The final decisions were still made by the king, but Gueuzes influence was undeniable. The old king was merely holding out to pass the throne to Prince Lewis, against the odds.


    Verdic was aware of Gueuzes hobbies.


    Only a few knew of them: some direct nobles, a handful of servants, and people like Verdic who provided him with money.


    Verdic had supplied him with countless funds and women, including some who wouldnt be missed if they disappeared. He ensured these transactions were discreet, involving several intermediaries. Once in Gueuzes hands, neither the money nor the women ever seemed to leave the pce.


    To most, like the current king or Marquis Penceir, Gueuzes excesses were abhorrent. But to Verdic, they were a wee weakness. Gueuzes scandals, though worrying to his immediate circle, didnt seem so severe to Verdic.


    Enjoying murder or being a sexual deviant wasnt a significant problem. While most deviants couldnt hide their nature, Gueuze at least knew how to conceal it. His victims were often foreigners, prostitutes, or catamites. If he found their appearance appealing, hed turn them into objects of pleasure.


    To Verdic, this was irrelevant.


    Gueuze maintained a reasonably good rtionship with Verdic. Most royals and nobles wouldve liked to trample him for his money, but Gueuze at least reciprocated the financial favors.


    Thats why Verdic wanted to deny the truth.


    It couldnt be Gueuze.


    Why would he kill his daughter?


    Holding a pen, Verdic felt at a loss. He didnt know whom to speak to or consult. But he needed to sort things out.


    Ise had vanished without taking anything or leaving with anyone. Who had taken her? Verdic had thought it was Raymonds doing, given his motives and behavior.


    But the discovered body was unmistakably Gueuzes handiwork. He had two methods for dealing with corpses: either gutting the abdomen and groin in a brutally standard fashion or turning them into decorative objects.


    Although the methods varied, his penchant for stitching, knots, and adornments was evident. He believed an artists characteristics should be visible in their art. In either case, he never severely damaged the face.


    So why was the face removed this time? It seemed almost as if it was done to avoid detection.


    God damn it.


    Verdic cursed, gripping the pen tightly. He had seen enough corpses to recognize Gueuzes work. Verdic had even facilitated that mans perversions.


    He never once considered that his own actions could impact his daughter, Ise. He always wanted to give her the best. That was his way of livingit was his duty to his daughter.


    He couldnt believe that Crown Prince Gueuze would do such a thing to Ise, to treat him in this manner. The crown prince knew he was desperately searching for his daughter. How could he


    <i>Crack.</i>


    The pen nib shattered on the paper, ink spreading like blood.


    Verdic couldnt stop his bitterughter.


    Why would Crown Prince Gueuze show favor to him alone? In the eyes of the royalty, he was just a moneybag.


    * * *


    Inspector Albert sighed. His father, the superintendent, had repeatedly advised extreme caution. The nation was in turmoil.


    Prince Lewis had died.


    The king was in aatose state due to the shock.


    Crown Prince Gueuze was about to be the King.


    Verdic Evans business was widely known to be entangled with Crown Prince Gueuze. People thought Verdic would be more sessful now, but in reality, he faced a higher risk of being discarded.


    Once the hunt is over, the hunting dogs are often the first to be consumed.


    Never speak the name of the suspected perpetrator. You must extract yourself from this case. Stall for time until things settle.


    I understand, Father.


    Albert changed the location where the body was found and the name of the informant in the records.


    In truth, the one who made the report was a close ally of Crown Prince Gueuze.


    Soon after, the maid from Ises residence, who was supposed to meet with Verdic, disappeared as well.


    Disappearances were bing rminglymon in the capital.


    * * *


    Raymond stood by the window, looking down outside. It must be Verdic and his entourage leaving. Karen had asked if he wouldnt go and see them off, but Raymond just smiled lightly and said nothing.


    Yet now, there was no trace of a smile on his face as he gazed out the window.


    Nor was there any hatred, anger, relief, or emptiness.


    It was the face of someone who had just done what needed to be done. More akin to a tree or a stone than a person.


    Death is too easy a revenge, isnt it?


    When he said this, his words seem to be intoxicated with a sinister joy. It was as though he wanted to share that pleasure with Carynne.


    But in reality, he didnt look joyful at all. Thats why she found it difficult to talk to him.


    They have all left now.


    However, Raymonds face began to regain its vitality as soon as he turned towards Carynne. The darkness disappeared, and his face started to glow again. Life began to swirl around him.


    But Carynne had seen his face just moments before and felt a nagging difort, like a misprinted page in a book. It was not a major issue, and it didnt hinder understanding the content, but it was persistently troubling.


    Thats right.


    Carynne looked up at Raymond. He seemed a bit thinner. But his face still wore an unchanged smile. The face looking down at her was, as always, that of a young man in love.


    And so, she smiled back.


    Towards this man who had done everything for her.


    If she had sympathized with Verdic, thenpassion would have been the worlds most annoying luxury.


    Lets smile.


    As if there was nothing to be unsettled by in this world.


    * * *


    Once Verdic was gone, Carynne and Raymond reverted to their routine of being alone together. Carynne had thought that with Verdic gone, the two of them would get along better.


    However, that wasnt the case.


    Gradually, that sense of unease umted.


    There were many reasons, but what bothered Carynne the most was the guilt festering inside her.


    For Carynne, there was only one person who mattered.


    Raymond Saytes was the only one for her, and she affirmed everything about him. He would do the same for her. They were the only real people in this fiction-like world.


    Raymond had always tried his best, even during the moments of those one hundred years when he still couldnt remember, even when Carynne was on the brink of execution.


    She had seen Raymonds face for a hundred years.


    From the moment they were reunited in that tower, she could perceive the passage of time in that facein those eyes.


    It was something that couldnt be hidden by mere movements or manners. How could one possibly stop the emotions and tears overflowing from those eyes?


    Even if their story repeated like a never-ending novel, the beginning was always with Carynne. Raymond was caught up in it. She knew that the reason he regained his memory, the reason for his transformation, was because of her.


    Raymond had changed.


    No matter how much he spoke of love, recited revenge, or acted cautiously, she couldnt deny that he had fundamentally changed.


    Of course, this didnt mean Carynne didnt love Raymond. How could she not love him? His change was because of her, so how could it not be dear to her?


    But this realization only increased the growing unease within her.

 Chapter 194 Full

    Chapter 194


    Carynne felt no need to feel guilty towards anyone, but she felt it towards him.


    ��Make a wager with me.��


    ��If you fall in love sincerely, I will help you.��


    What had Dun done to Raymond? Carynne confessed to Dun that Raymond was her true love and that she wouldn��t choose anyone else to love. She couldn��t think of anyone but him.


    Carynne had made her choice back then, and since then, Raymond remembered everything. And he changed because of her. It was both a joy and a sorrow.


    ����Is there a problem?��


    ��The taste is off. I guess I got used to the meals prepared by the chef in the meantime.��


    Carynne replied as she finished her soup. Raymond lowered his head with an embarrassed look.


    ��I��m sorry.��


    ��It��s fine.��


    Carynne felt bitter that a conversation she intended to keep light was bing heavy again. Raymond was genuinely sorry. With someone else, it could have been a simple exchange of ��Eat what��s given�� and ��I��ll eat it then,�� but not with the two of them.


    ��I will learn to cook better soon.��


    ��It��s really okay, Sir Raymond.��


    Carynne reiterated it, but the mood just grew heavier. She wanted to say something but didn��t know what to say. She also didn��t know what could be a light topic.


    ��Just speak your mind.��


    ��Excuse me?��


    Raymond looked at Carynne with a slightly sorrowful and apprehensive look.


    ��If you don��t tell me, I won��t know, Carynne. There��s a limit to understanding through just gauging. Just ask me.��


    ��You won��t tell me everything even if I ask.��


    ��I��ll try to tell you everything I can.��


    ��������


    ��No, I will tell you everything.��


    Raymond corrected himself. Carynne didn��t want to hurt him.


    But their attempts to not hurt each other were causing more pain. Carynne felt like crying a little.


    ��Sir Raymond, no�� Not ��Sir�� anymore. Verdic called you ��Baron��, didn��t he? Are you a baron this time?��


    ��Yes. One of the reasons I went to the capital this time was to receive the title of baron.��


    Raymond answered candidly. Carynne nodded.


    ��I suppose your brother, the previous Baron Saytes, wasn��t supposed to die yet, but he passed away early.��


    ��That��s right.��


    Carynne bit her lip.


    ����Did you kill him?��


    ��Yes.��


    His answer was too decisive. Raymond had decided to reveal everything to Carynne rather than hide it. He was no longer ashamed. It was just a matter of stating what had happened. Carynne nodded too. She couldn��t avoid him either.


    ��When was it?��


    ��It was as soon as my memories returned.��


    ����Why did you do it?��


    ��To have you safely in this mansion as soon as possible, taking control of the barony was necessary.��


    ��I�� see.��


    Carynne��s voice trembled slightly. She had to steady herself.


    A hundred years ago, Raymond did not believe that Carynne had beening back to life. One reason was his older brother.


    For over a century, Raymond��s brother was always destined to die. The timing varied, but the oue was constant. Unlike Lord Hare, who had asionally lived, Raymond��s sick brother always ended up dying, passing on the barony to him.


    ��You didn��t know my brother would die.��


    ��He was just ill.��


    As the death sentence was handed down to Carynne when she was 117 years old, she had been able to sense from Raymond��s words that he believed her.


    Before, Raymond concluded that Carynne would, of course, tell him about the future if she truly lived over and over again.


    If she had, she wouldn��t possibly let his one and only family to die.


    And yet, his brother would always die. That��s what he found horrible.


    But now, he had be someone who took the initiative to kill his older brother, who was bound to die anyway.


    This content is taken from f��ee??eb?ove?.c?m.


    Her tongue felt leaden.


    ��Thest time you left, was it to kill him?��


    ��That was a different matter, Carynne. My brother always died before that day, historically. I merely hastened the inevitable. He had been dead for a long time already.��


    ��I see.��


    ��Do you find me repulsive?��


    Raymond looked directly at Carynne. There was a heaviness in his voice. Carynne shook her head.


    ��How could I?��


    ��������


    ��I��m just afraid that your efforts won��t pay off again this time.��


    Carynne remembered the moment she fell from the tower. Raymond hade, abandoning everything, for someone unworthy of being saved like her.


    That��s why she told Dun that this man was her true love.


    But even then, Carynne died.


    ��Sir Raymond, I feel remorseful because you changed because of me.��


    Raymond looked as if he had been struck.


    ��Why do you feel remorseful?��


    How could she not?


    Carynne needed to speak slowly. She felt as if her throat would close up if she spoke too fast.


    ��You could have lived a life independent of me. You know that. This is not a world inside a novel. I was just born this way, like my mother�� And����


    Carynne��s breath hitched. Until now, she hadn��t told Raymond that Dun was the key to this problem. And she realized why she felt guilty towards him.


    Dun, who did not fear death. The only ce to find answers was with Dun, but she couldn��t even extract them through threats or torture.


    ��I��ve thought about it. You could have just lived your life, but why did you fall into this hell with me, crawling at the bottom�� It��s because of my choice, in the end.��


    Carynne fell silent.


    Ultimately, Raymond had fallen to such wretched depths because Carynne had chosen him. Because she dered to Dun that he was her male protagonist. It wasn��t his fault for being handsome, nor for fitting the role of a romance novel��s hero so well.


    She tried to pass it off lightly, but looking at the changed Raymond took her breath away.


    ��Now��, Carynne truly loved Raymond.


    Raymond seeking revenge on Verdic had be a trivial matter. Too many things had happened. Raymond��s brother died, Prince Lewis died, and Ise died. Even to Ise, who he usually hesitated to harm, Raymond seemed connected to this series of events.


    For over a hundred years, Carynne had watched Raymond. Loved him. Loved every aspect of him. She always believed he would be by her side. Even after giving up the idea that he was her knight destined to rescue her from eternal life, deep down, that belief never changed.


    As a result, she turned Raymond��s life into one like a life in a fictional book.


    She recalledher more na?ve self from the past.


    Despite the repetition and the tedium that led to despair, one always remembers the first time.


    Carynne, brainwashed by Nancy, believed she was in a book and trembled in fear of dying if she couldn��t fall in love.


    Dun was endlesslycking and unresponsive. Raymond was the knight from a fairy tale who approached her at that time. He was the one who approached her first.


    ��I keep having the same nightmare. It all feels like a terrible dream�� like a novel.��


    ��You seem like my male protagonist.��


    The start, the very first love, was truly simple, na?ve, and inexperienced. That Raymond, who she vaguely remembered, smiled awkwardly but didn��t say anything to Carynne. He just smiled, saying it was an honor.


    But what about after that?


    It was only a year. In fact, if they considered the duration, it was less than a year of love.


    They had only repeated cautious first meetings and tensions. They barely had any trivial arguments in reality, and their love always ended at the perfect moment it was supposed to happen.


    Just a few months of interaction.


    Carynne clung to that. She thought love was the only solution to escape from this world. As more time passed, she even wondered if that brief period could really be called love.

 Chapter 195

    Chapter 195


    Carynne had always dreamed of a world beyond the book after her repeated deaths. But she had never hesitated about the idea of leaving Raymond.


    Her love for Raymond was just that shallow. Initially, she thought it was love, but as her life repeated, he became merely a means to escape the world of this book.


    That shallow love hardened over a hundred years, making Carynne wish for Raymond to remember her, and this choice dragged him from a normal life into wandering the pages like her. And now, Carynne truly loved him. Yet, the answer remained elusive.


    Just eating, drinking, and sleeping together in this mansion wouldnt end their lives.


    They would forever be people walking on paper, alone together.


    What exactly is the true love that Dun spoke of? If she couldnt be pregnant, this loop would go on forever and ever.


    Carynne was happy yet saddened that Raymond joined her in this life. He changed and made all these efforts solely to save her.


    Because of me.


    Still, her death would repeat. Raymond would live another life, and they would meet again, all their memories intact. Unless they could find an answer from Dun, this was inevitable.


    Carynne knew she should tell Raymond this, but she couldnt bring herself to speak.


    Time passed amidstplex emotions. It was Raymond who broke the silence.


    Carynne, you dont need to feel any remorse for me.


    Raymond looked at Carynne and smiled. It was a calm and confident smile.


    But Carynne shook her head.


    No, I need to. I must apologize.


    Now she really had to tell him.


    Theres something Ive been too scared to tell you.


    Carynne admitted that, while she had demanded Raymond to tell her everything, she herself had been too scared to speak up.


    Ill start with what Ive been thinking. I believe childbirth might be the answer to end this repetition. My mother also experienced this repetitive life. And she sought Duns cooperation with my case. And


    Carynne bit her lip. It was painful to talk about her past rtionships to the man she had only juste to love.


    Surely, those experiences were meaningless to her and were merely experiments that had to be done. But would Raymond think the same?


    Though he had given her unconditional love, she wasnt sure if it was going to be alright to reveal that she had been with many men.


    She didnt want to remind him that there had been other men. Even if he remembered, it was differenting from her own lips.


    But at this time, her own shame seemed truly trivial.


    Until now, I Ive never been sessful in getting pregnant with anyone. I might be barren. And


    Despite trailing off, she finished her thought.


    I think Dun made me barren.


    She was afraid to say it because it all but confirmed that Raymonds efforts were in vain.


    She didnt want to admit it.


    Carynne.


    As he stood up, she lowered her head.


    He took her hand.


    I already know about your deaths while you were trying to kill Dun. And I am aware of your past lives, too.


    Moreover, I had some of my own guesses as well.


    How?


    Because you once told me that your mother also went through this. I considered the possibility of it being hereditary. And Ive aged quite a bit since then too.


    Its alright.


    Raymond gave Carynne the words she wanted to hear. This made her feel even more miserable. Would his efforts ever be rewarded?


    I see.


    Raymond gently lifted Carynnes chin. Their eyes met. There seemed to be a me in Raymonds eyes. Carynne, slightly scared, backed away.


    Thats why I was afraid of being intimate with you.


    His directness was overwhelming. The intensity in Raymonds eyes wasnt anger.


    Avoiding his steady gaze, Carynne asked.


    Why?


    Whether you truly cant conceive, whether theres absolutely no chance of pregnancy. I was worried that asking you to confirm it through intimacy would be unpleasant for you.


    Their lips brushed lightly. Carynne, wanting to hear more, gently pushed Raymond away, but this seemed to fuel him more. She felt breathless.


    If thats the only issue, then theres only one thing left for us to do.


    * * *


    Having done it this much, shouldnt she be pregnant by now?


    Carynney on top of Raymond, thinking this. She had lost track of time. It seemed like a long while had passed.


    Lately, Raymond clung to her as if he knew nothing else. Even during meals, they were in constant physical contact, moving almost together. He held her even while working or when she slept.


    He quickly prepared their meals, then they spent all day together. There was nothing to distract them.


    From a human perspective, hygienically speaking can we just bathe separately?


    Carynne seriously requested this while pushing away Raymond who clung to her even in the bathtub.


    Raymond reluctantly moved away. The bathtub filled with bubbles was cramped for two.


    Carynne was astonished, beyond admiration, at Raymonds inexhaustible energy. They ate the same food, so why was there such a difference in stamina between them?


    Carynne, you really should eat more meat.


    Other than pheasant, rabbit, and bird, what else is there?


    Theres beef andmb.


    Not the smoked ones.


    Fresh meat, then Should I catch the horse?


    Carynne thought of the beautiful white mare tied up in the stable and shook her head. The very thought made her lose her appetite.


    She was truly fed up with meat. Raymond seemed eager to increase her stamina, but if that was the goal, it would be better to exercise outside. She had had enough of bloody meat.


    Speaking of clothes. The ones you bought with that design


    Ill make sure to buy only what you want from now on.


    Dont cut me off. Anyway, thinking about it now, they seem suitable for pregnant women.


    Carynne thought of the dreadful-looking clothes. They were strange, but if considered as undergarments or loungewear, they werent so bad.


    The skirts were short enough for good venttion, and the lining was soft. They werent designed for tightening corsets. The belly area was spacious, and without decorations, it was easy to move in.


    In many ways, the clothes suited a woman with a growing belly. Maybe Raymond bought them while hoping she would get pregnant this time.


    But I still dont like the design.


    You find it so because youre still young.


    <i>Hah</i>


    Carynne was baffled by such an ill-fittingment. Then she yfully sshed soap suds on Raymond.


    <i>Ack</i> My eyes.


    Serves you right for saying that.


    Better than being too old, right? This


    Carynne used a towel nearby to wipe around Raymonds eyes. It was annoying to be the one causing the mess and then cleaning it up.


    Carynne, lets just bathe


    Raymond made a stifled groan. Their naked bodies were close together. Carynne quickly pulled away, feeling the prominent object pressing against her from below.


    Not here, please.


    This is torture.


    Raymond frowned as he pushed his hair back.


    If I do get pregnant, I guess I could wear those clothes. But theyre too radical to wear outside.


    Understood.


    Raymond sighed.


    While other matters seemed more pressing, he still kept his promise to Carynne.

 Chapter 196

    Chapter 196


    Back then <i>Haa,</i> trying to kill Dun and continually failing


    Carynne spoke to Raymond, who had buried his face in her chest, making her tremble with pleasure even as they conversed. There was no hesitation in their physical union. Raymond moved slowly and continued speaking.


    I looked into various ounts after you died.


    Did you find anything?


    Like you mentioned before, theres such a legend saying that its passed down maternally. But they were orally transmitted and not recorded anywhere, so its hard to consider them authentic sources. Theres no leading family, and the stories varied too much.


    So, the cycle ends with childbirth? <i>Ah,</i> it hurts.


    Carynne gripped Raymonds hair as she winced in slight pain, but even that pain transformed into pleasure. Raymonds groans grew rougher.


    After calming down a bit, they continued their conversation more seriously.


    The lineage wasnt from this country but from beyond the White Mountain Range.


    Hmm, really?


    Yes, supposedly a saintess is born in each generation. The legend says that they atone for humanitys sins through death and give birth to the next sacrifice.


    Thats so simplistic that its infuriating.


    The stories essentially boil down to that. But theyre too ancient and not well-organized.


    Indeed, if Carynne could have borne children quickly, she might have just passed everything to the next generation and ended it all with that simple exnation.


    The stories of Carynne, Catherine, Ca, and countless other women in their line werent meant to be shared with others. Their memories dont transfer, only repeat in their offspring.


    But how did Raymond remember?


    Carynne pondered this as Raymond climbed off her.


    And shortly after, she forgot about it.


    * * *


    Indulgent yet diligent days continued.


    I really want to go out to the garden today.


    Dress up properly, then.


    Yes, yes.


    Carynne finallyyered herself in clothes, acknowledging her civility. For too long, she hadnt worn clothes, or only wore thin garments. She turned her back to Raymond as she dressed in the clothes Verdic had left behind.


    Dont tighten the corset too much, just tie the knot.


    Perhaps there might be a child in her womb now.


    Carynne swallowed the rest of her thought. Even to her, it seemed like a fanciful idea.


    But despite their frequent intimacy, Carynnes body showed no change.


    * * *


    Time passed, but there was no physical transformation. Carynne and Raymonds conversations were less in words and more in pleasurable moans. If that could be considered conversation.


    Its already autumn.


    The garden will look wonderful in winter.


    You hardly ever look at the garden.


    I did enjoy snowball fights. Never cared much for flowers, though.


    Raymond handed Carynne a fur shawl, saying this. It was too early for such a thick garment, but she draped it on, appreciating the gesture. Then she linked arms with Raymond.


    Ive never seen snow falling over this ce.


    The Tes Manor was located in a warm region, so its winter was very short. Carynne had never spent a single winter here.


    She looked up at the clear autumn sky, imagining a snowyndscape. It would undoubtedly be beautiful.


    It would be lovely to see a child running around in such a ce.


    Carynne found it hard to imagine herself as a mother, but the thought of having a child didnt seem so bad.


    Sir Raymond.


    Yes, Carynne?


    Im curious about something.


    When Raymond responded, Carynne looked up at him and asked.


    What was it like for you after I died?


    Carynne had always wondered about this. She knew nothing of Raymonds future after her death. For her, she would wake up the next day in the rain-soaked garden, as if nothing had happened.


    What life did Raymond lead after her death? Revenge? Suicide? It couldnt have been suicidehe said that he had a long lifespan.


    So, what did he do? Carynne had always been curious.


    The truth is, I lived well even after you died.


    Raymond said, looking down at her with a smile.


    Carynne felt a mix of emotions and loosened her grip on his arm.


    I really did.


    Theres no need to say it again. Im envious.


    Keep being envious. That way, maybe youll live longer than me and have your revenge.


    His yfulughter blended with the wind.


    Time passed.


    And that day continued to approach.


    * * *


    Carynney in bed.


    Wrapped in Raymonds arms, she felt warm and sleepy. Was theundry done yesterday? She suddenly thought of this, smelling a faint scent of soap. A tingling sensation, like being in water. She moved her fingers. They still responded. Carynne looked out the window. Leaves were falling.


    She thought about what a terminally ill girl might say.


    <i>Will I die once those leaves fall?</i>


    Would Raymondugh or cry if she told him that? Could theyugh together at death, considering its not a big deal for them? Or would they cry again at the thought of dying?


    Carynne shook her head, dismissing the thought as a dull joke. She preferred to hear someone elses story than tell her own.


    Tell me a story.


    Carynne.


    Im sleepy.


    Raymond pondered which story to tell. He had to say something, she wanted it. After a moment, he spoke.


    I dont know what kind of story would be good.


    Carynne looked at him disapprovingly, then started herself.


    Well Ill tell you one instead then. Honestly, Ive been with many men.


    What are you saying now.


    Raymond responded bleakly. Carynne asked again. It seems people be curious about everything when death approaches. She couldnt bear not to ask.


    So, after I died did you live well with another woman?


    Carynne opened her eyes to an unfamiliar emotion.


    Even after opening up about her own circumstances, she hadnt dared to ask Raymond the same. But now, she was curious about everything.


    Until now, Carynne never felt possessive over Raymond or other men. To her, they were, no matter how dazzling, merely characters in text. Meaningless, brief encounters.


    Yet now, Carynne felt jealousy. It was a base emotion for someone whose life was independent of hers. But Raymond took Carynnes feelings in stride, unfazed and at ease.


    Carynne, as I said before, I really did live well after you died.


    In the midst of all this thats great for you.


    Sofortable, so easy.


    Carynnes voice grew soft. She didnt know Raymonds future, his life after her death.


    Raymond looked amused at her expression, chuckling softly. Carynne didnt like hisughter but didnt want to retort either.


    She didnt want to hear about other women, but seeing Raymonds amused face made her even less inclined to speak.


    But isnt that good? You dont have to feel guilty about me.


    Oh, wow. What a relief.


    Who should feel sorry for whom? Carynnes tone was sharp, prompting Raymond to ask again.


    Why are you upset about me living well?


    Cant I be?


    Carynnes face looked displeased.


    Jealous.


    Envious.


    The thought that he lived well even after her death was bitter. She should be purely happy about it, but her heart still felt this way.


    Did she wish for him to live miserably forever after her death? At least he could have pretended so. Carynne felt ufortable.


    Did she want Raymond to be ruined? But the Raymond in front of her seemed already far removed from his past self. Should she be happy about that?


    Shes conflicted. And she felt slightly disgusted with herself.


    Raymond,ughing in front of such a Carynne, eventually got hit.


    * * *


    It waste autumn.


    Carynnes death was approaching.


    Her belly had not swollen at all.


    Carynne and Raymond never talked about that day. They were unaware of thest of thest days.


    But slowly, the assumption that it would happen again lingered in the silence.


    It was time to talk about it.


    Carynne spoke with a hint of resentment in her voice.


    I thought about a double suicide once.


    Carynne, that Whats the reason for that?


    You know, Ive always wanted to kill you. At least just once.


    As Carynne said that with a bright smile, Raymonds expression grew bleak.

 Chapter 197

    Chapter 197


    Um, I mean Perhaps I did wrong you in some in many ways, Carynne.


    Too many to remember?


    Carynneughed. Raymonds face was serious, but it wasnt what he thought.


    Back then, she was just so bored she could have actually gone batshit insane, and killing Raymond seemed like a grand purpose for her. Physically and in the scale of her life, the idea of killing Raymond was a tantalizing goal.


    When I decided to be a murderer, life turned upside down. I thought if the hardest person to kill was you, Raymond, killing you would be incredibly satisfying.


    Thats profoundly touching.


    Raymonds voice was tinged with sarcasm. Then he embraced Carynne again, as she shivered.


    Raymond, Im a bit cold. Could you pull the nket up more?


    Alright.


    Raymond nced at the roaring firece. The nkets were thick. There was no more room to increase the warmth. Embracing her tighter, Raymond murmured.


    Winter ising.


    But Carynnes body was getting colder.


    Raymond bowed his head to whisper to her. He had to keep talking. She wanted it. What should he talk about?


    When it snows, it will be really beautiful.


    Can we sled in the snow?


    Yes, the grassy meadows are great for ying. I used to y there often as a child. This winter


    This winter will see record-breaking snowfall.


    Next summer, the monsoons will be severe.


    And


    * * *


    <i>Truly, I had lived well even without you.</i>


    Just like that. Despite aching hearts and tears, despite vows of vengeance, time flows. We cannot destroy our lives clinging to mere months of memories.


    The sky is blue, the air clear, flowers abound, and hatred, anger, and wars continue.


    Good music and great books keeping. Unexpected things happen. Friends die or stay, and new ones appear. As you age, there are so many things to do.


    Good things happen in unexpected ces. Unforeseen malice is seen. And sometimes, miracles. Storms turn to spring rain, wars end, and watching the next generation grow is meaningful. You would probably like it too. Amidst uncertainties, beauty is still found.


    I knew youd be jealous.


    Thats why next time, you should live longer and have your revenge. Live longer than me, boast about what I havent seen. That would be more equal.


    Life is, sadly, worth living.


    You meet countless people, rejoice, part, and feel grateful. If you live longer, you might meet better people, schrs, and individuals than I did.


    But still, there is only one woman for me.


    <em>You.</em>


    Frankly speaking, I dont want to say it was because of the few months we spent together. Our encounter was brief, and that was it. Many people move on from a separation and meet others without diminishing their past rtionships.


    Carynne, you spent your life seeking love and facing death repeatedly, but in the world, there are so many things happening that one doesnt need to cling to such short-lived passions of men and women.


    Oh, alright. Ill be honest.


    I set my standards too high after you, and no other womanpared. Youre partly to me for that. Are you satisfied? So, after that it was enough. Even if it was a brief encounter, there was no need for more. Passion, youth, guilt, perhaps deception all these things left their mark on a corner of my life, and that was sufficient.


    So, you dont have to feel any remorse.


    I lived quite well without you.


    Carynne.


    Theres one thing I lied to you about.


    Theres something Ive been too scared to tell you.


    I remember everything.


    All your 100 deaths and the lives I lived after that. Then, the five deaths and five lives after those as well. I remember it all.


    The year you fell from the towerthat year you turned 117


    After you died, all my memories came flooding back. There was no stopping them. And the hundreds of years before meeting you again in this life felt like I was walking through hell.


    I am over 7,000 years old.


    You asked how I could still talk and move, but still, one goes on living. The reason I could stay sane, perhaps, is that my life after each of your 100 deaths was the same.


    Before you turned 117, my life without remembering you was always the same. Mourning the same period, moving on the same way, always living the same time. It wasnt such a bad life. So now, I really dont need to think of anything other than loving you. Ive had my fill.


    But still, I think it would have been better if you were by my side all those years.


    * * *


    Raymond closed Carynnes eyes.


    There seemed to be a visitor.


    * * *


    Verdic finally found his daughter.


    The wet nurse who came up to rece the missing maid remembered Ises physical characteristics.


    The corpse was indeed his daughter.


    Ise had be part of Crown Prince Gueuzes collection.


    Verdic cried for only one day.


    Then, he rose to think of what he had to do.


    Having been tired and sad for too long, it became clearer what he must do.


    Why did Crown Prince Gueuze kidnap Ise? Looking at the results first, there were many reasons.


    For Crown Prince Gueuzenow kinga merchant who knew his secrets was a nuisance. While there might have been ways to win him over, Gueuze chose a cleaner method.


    Just getting rid of everything.


    Prince Lewis, Verdic, Marquis Penceir, even his own father.


    Over time, Gueuze umted tasks he needed to perform.


    Such are the deeds to be done as a king.


    However, Gueuzes ns were much shorter than expected.


    Because he was fortunate.


    People said,


    The gods were doing everything to elevate him to kingship quickly.


    Annoying money-grubbers like Verdic also had to be dealt with promptly.


    Gueuze had his eye on Verdics daughter for a long time. A man like Verdic knew well how to flee and hide, but his only weakness was his daughter. She didnt exactly suit his taste, but a young and healthy seventeen-year-old girl held considerable value.


    Have you finally found Carynne Hare?


    We found a woman who resembles her. I think it must be her.


    Gueuze leaned his chin on his hand, lost in thought. The daughter, said to resemble Catherine, intrigued him.


    But now wasnt the time.


    Things he nned to do over five or ten years were happening all at once.


    But it was also a matter thats troubling to put it off.


    Gueuze shook his head.


    * * *


    It was during one night in springtime, the pouring rain drumming down heavily.


    Raymond came to visit Crown Prince Gueuze.


    Gueuze intended to call people to throw him out. He disliked this man. And above all, he was the henchman of someone who stood against him.


    Initially, Gueuze thought Raymond hade to assassinate him. But as he was about to call people, Raymond showed his empty hands first.


    So, Gueuze wondered what this man was plotting.


    Rubbing his head aching from a hangover, Crown Prince Gueuze asked Raymond while holding a handgun in one hand.


    Gueuze wanted to kill this man if possible, and he was ready to shoot if Raymond said just one single word wrong. He had to find some pretext to kill him.


    But his initial restraint was due to curiosity.


    A man who should never havee was here empty-handed, so there must be a reason.


    This man had always, without fail, looked at him with contempt.


    Yet here he was, now putting forward an unbelievable proposition.


    I intend to make you king.

 Chapter 198

    Chapter 198


    * * *


    Indeed, it seems now isnt the right time. And since Sir Raymond has done a favor for me, Im fine with leaving it at that.


    The servant stayed silent. Truthfully, he knew that if Gueuze had gotten close to Carynne, he would be so overwhelmed by desire that he wouldnt know what to do. But, well, he was in no position to say such a thing.


    I shall take my leave.


    Very well. By the way, what did Verdic say? How did he feel about his ten chests of gold bing property of the state?


    He did not say anything.


    He must be very proud, working for the state. How rewarding that must be.


    Gueuzeughed heartily, delighted beyond measure. He liked this kind of thing. Seeing a trusting face twist into despair.


    Whispering into the ear of his dying son that Sir Raymond has betrayed you was a very enjoyable thing to do.


    Smiling and saying You only have one son left now to a grieving father was incredibly satisfying.


    And the fact that his aplice was none other than Raymond himself was, truly, almost happiness.


    Well, I thought Sir Raymond no, Baron Raymond resembled Prince Lewis more.


    The taste of power he felt after a long time was exhrating. He enjoyed manipting the fates of others, finding it much more fulfilling than toying with powerless prostitutes or foreigners.


    But it turns out he resembles <i>me</i> more. When I looked closely, his face is quite simr to mine when I was younger.


    When Gueuze had raised a ss for a toast, his subjects bowed their heads, congratting him with such reverence.


    He disliked his own son. And naturally, he also disliked Raymond, whom his son favored. But after understanding why Lewis liked Raymond, he found no reason to hate him anymore.


    Lewis admired Raymond. But people who were simply capable and handsome were plentiful in this country. The reason the prince was so fond of Raymond was because Raymond resembled his father.


    Or rather, his older brother.


    So, thats why Lewis liked him so much.


    <i>What a pity.</i>


    Hisughter was unstoppable.


    * * *


    Verdic had spent his entire fortune.


    Marquis Penceir was a noble who could have been apetitor to Crown Prince Gueuze. The next in line for the throne was far down the session and a foreigner. As long as Gueuze remained powerful, there was no chance for him to be king, but Prince Lewiss murder created a huge scandal.


    Rumors were rampant that Marquis Penceir had schemed to be king, but these did notst long.


    Shortly after Prince Lewiss death, Marquis Penceirs carriage overturned, paralyzing his lower body.


    Its been a long time since west met.


    Marquis Penceir looked sharply at Verdic, who hade to see him. They did not hide their dislike for each other.


    I didnt expect you toe looking for me.


    Marquis Penceir, do you think that the carriage ident was a coincidence?


    If you know something, its better to speak directly rather than beat around the bush.


    Verdic shared everything he had discovered.


    When a wealthy merchant, rich enough to be envied by royalty, spends almost his entire fortune gathering information, stories start to emerge from everywhere.


    It wasnt easy to find the truth, but Verdic was driven by the heart of a parent who had lost his child.


    When Verdic handed over the chests of gold, one of Gueuzes subordinates inevitably opened up.


    <i>Ill use everything I have for vengeance.</i>


    Verdic wanted revenge.


    But there was something more pressing he had to do first.


    Where are you going! We havent even properly conducted Ises funeral yet!


    His wife cried out in anger. Verdic patted her shoulder once and stood up.


    * * *


    I didnt expect you toe today.


    Come out right now And it would be wise to take your hands off her.


    Verdic was pointing a gun at Raymond, not an axe. Behind him stood numerous soldiers, Marquis Penceirs troops.


    Raymond smiled bitterly.


    Hmm As expected, Carynnes presence created such variables. I didnt expect you toe.


    Take your hands off her, ande out.


    Verdic aimed the gun.


    No matter how agile Raymond was, it was impossible to dodge a bullet at this distance.


    And even if he was a sharpshooter, the difference between a person with a gun and one without was clear.


    Currently, Verdic hade with dozens of trained soldiers.


    Release Carynne Hare right now!


    * * *


    The inconceivable happened.


    * * *


    Verdic held Ise in his arms and cried.


    <i>How could you do this to Ise? Why must my daughter suffer such a fate? A young, innocent girl with no grudges against anyone. The sinner should be me, shouldnt I be the one to bear all this?</i>


    Then he realized.


    The sinner was himself.


    Verdic had never felt guilt before. The opulent life of a wealthy merchant oppressed by nobles and royalty was exhausting, barely able to breathe unless he wed and bit for everything. Everything was a means to an end. There was no need for reasons to increase the familys wealth. For the value of the Evans family, he, his father, even his wife, had strived.


    People hanging themselves after being ruined by usury, daughters unable to repay debts being sold to brothels, unending conflicts, outbreaks of epidemicsnone of it mattered much to Verdic.


    Ise ended up like this because she was born his daughter.


    Verdic vowed revenge against Raymond and Crown Prince Gueuze.


    But there was something he had to do first.


    If that woman is still there.


    Marquis Penceir spoke as if it was obvious. He knew Crown Prince Gueuze well.


    Raymond must be keeping her to hand over to Crown Prince Gueuze. Ill send people to watch. If the momentes when Raymond Saytes hands her over, we can catch solid evidence.


    Verdic remained silent. Marquis Penceir seemed slightly surprised by his expression.


    You dont mean to say


    Ise died while chasing after Raymond.


    Raymond had handed her over.


    Then the woman whos there now


    Verdic recalled that girl who was his daughters agethe one he had rescued from the water.


    Saving her life was one of the few good deeds he had done in his life.


    He thought of how Carynne kept desperately defending Raymond with unbelievable lies.


    Her actions were simr to how his daughter Ise had been, helplessly in love with Raymond.


    Let that woman go, you bastard.


    * * *


    He could not cry. Now was not the time to weep. Now was not the time for regrets.


    Raymond embraced Carynne.


    Look, Carynne.


    Miracles happen in life.


    That Verdic never once before haha.


    Verdic came to save you. Life is truly unpredictable. Even after living seven whole millennia, Ive never seen anything like it. To find kindness in someone you never expected, truly, how joyous


    Carynne.


    Verdic came to save you.


    Such miracles <i>do</i> happen.


    It would have been great if you could see this.


    * * *


    Cleaning is indeed not an easy task.


    Raymond spoke while mopping the floor and wiped the bloodstains off his face. He also needed to open the windows. The stench of blood was overwhelming.


    One, two well, the marquis underestimated me too much. Just thirty men?


    How could Raymond die in his own house? Having returned, Raymond had set up numerous devices in the house.


    Raymond piled up the bodies neatly. Even for him, cleaning such arge quantity was not easy.


    After a long cleanup, Raymond opened a bag. Inside, a person was stored.


    Do you know?


    Torture, you see, is actually impossible to endure. The hero of all those epics, the unyielding soldier who doesnt answer to any torture He doesnt really exist. My superiors dont trust me, and I dont trust my subordinates either. Its not because the person is weak, but because thats the nature of torture.


    Raymond held a hammer in his hand.


    Thats why apetent superior must manage the distribution of information well.


    Carynne was too soft-hearted to conduct proper torture. That task should have been left to Raymond from the start.


    Thus, he made his way towards Dun.


    And saw his own reflection in the priests ck eyes.


    The visage of a demon.

 Chapter 199 | The man who doesn’t read books II

    Chapter 199 | The man who doesn��t read books II


    Youre trying hard, I see.


    But not quite in the direction I expected.


    Still, such methods wont be of much use.


    Even if you cut off my limbs and gouge out my eyes, its impossible.


    No, youre right.


    Torture is torture.


    If you cut off a persons fingers, anyone would spill their secrets.


    Im well aware of my own weakness.


    Ill undoubtedly cry, scream, and beg for your sympathy.


    I am such a weak person.


    But you wont get any answers from me.


    Because the future me will know nothing and remember nothing.


    I will be able to confirm eternal life in the next life.


    You wont understand what Im saying now.


    But soon, you will.


    Sir Raymond.


    Then, goodbye.

 Chapter 200 | 05. Beginning to ending – This is not the beginning: Carynne

    Chapter 200 | 05. Beginning to ending �C This is not the beginning: Carynne


    The beginning is always the same.


    The gray sky, the drizzling rain, the muddy, barren garden. The chill in the air, the mud-stained nightgown. The gash on her throat that stung. If she didnt go back to the mansion soon, the gardener would find her. Near her feet, she picked up the rope.


    That version of me a hundred years ago. I wonder if I wanted to die back then, too.


    She held up the noose and muttered, <i>I failed. Again.</i> Judging by the gash made by the rope on her neck, she failed to die all those years ago as well, even before this perpetual repetition started happening.


    Unlike the damp hallway, the room inside was warm. The temperature was better due to the thick fur quilts that blocked out the cold and the fire that burned in the firece.


    She took off her dirty clothes, but did not throw them into the firece. Instead, she ced them by the hearth. So, the mes continued to burn, it continued to be warm. She looked at the naked woman looking back at her from the mirror. And, she shrugged her shoulders.


    Failures happen in life, dont they?


    She sat in a chair, looking at paper and ink. Dipping the pen in ink, she wrote on the paper.


    <b>[ How old am I? ]</b>


    Carynneughed at herself for a while, dotting the question mark. Its hard to count how many times she died because of Dun.


    Well, after everything that happened, did it even matter now how many times itd been?


    <b>[ My name is Carynne Hare. ]</b>


    She pressed the pen firmly. The writing was neat and elegant. There was no anger or madness. Carynne smiled. Failure again. This time again. But its okay. She was not starting from the beginning. She was waiting for Raymond, and they would take on this challenge together.


    She was always herself. <i>Her name was Carynne Hare.</i> But now its not the beginning. Her life isnt a repetition. Now Raymond remembers. Carynne got up and walked to her room.


    She looked at the coin. She didnt want to engrave a new number. She didnt need evidence. No need to struggle desperately. Now they can try together. Life can move forward with just one other person. <i>I am not starting from the beginning.</i>


    Ugh.


    it was no longer needed. Carynne threw the coin into the fire.


    Slowly, its edges began to melt. Carynne watched it calmly.


    A bit regretful, but relieving. Its a meaningful act in its own way. What matters was not the remnants of the coin but the person, Raymond, with her. So, she wasnt scared anymore. She didnt need to be anxious. She knew she could wait for him even if hes not here now.


    How should she live this time? What would be a good way to go about this?


    She felt light. It seemed good to think slowly before Raymond arrived.


    Carynne changed her clothes and fell asleep.


    Afortable and sound, deep sleep.


    * * *


    Youre up now?


    Oh my, Miss, you woke up early. Are you alright?


    Notpletely alright, honestly. I know that my memories have been erased, so


    <i>tter.</i>


    Uh, w-what?


    Carynne chuckled. She probably didnt need to threaten Nancy. She could just ask, and Nancy would answer. Nancy was softer and more fearful than she seemed.


    We have a lot to talk about, dont we?


    * * *


    Whats the point of living a life like that?


    Catherine looked at Carynne with tearful eyes.


    I wish you would find true love. I wish you wouldnt live like us, like me and our mothers. Its nothing. This is Carynne, Carynne. Listen to me. Youre going to live very, very long. Mom and Dad are just for a moment, and your life will be fixed at seventeen, choosing someone to be the father of a child for a long time. Youre a princess. You have to wait for your prince.


    I dont need that!


    Youre young. Youll understand Mom as you grow older. This is the gift I can give you. I had no other choice. But you can choose. Its just our fate. And someday youlle to see it as a blessing.


    As Carynne aged, her seizures increased.


    Who am I? Where is this? Where did my mother go?


    The brainwashing became more perfect as time repeated. It started when Dun began bringing in tranquilizers to the Hare mansion.


    <b>[ It is all thanks to Your Lordship that Ive been studying well. Enclosed with this letter is some medicine that can help Carynne. ]</b>


    That bastard Dun.


    <i>I should have fed you to the dogs.</i>


    Carynne gritted her teeth. But her anger didntst long. Her memories sporadically faded away.


    I need to remember


    Every time she tried to recall her memories, Carynne desperately wrote something down. Even if the memories were lost, perhaps the records could remain.


    My name is, my name is Carynne Hare.


    Carynne repeated to herself.


    If I lose it, I can read it. Even if the memory is gone, the record remains. Read the letters. Just read, and itll be okay.


    She ingrained this strongly. Even if she forgets, she can read her book. She became obsessively convinced of this. Just read the book. Read my writings. <i>I exist within these pages</i>. The writings will help bring back the memories.


    Carynne clung to her book every night, muttering to herself.


    To live again? So, Im supposed to die on my seventeenth birthday? I dont believe it!


    True love will break the spell? Dont make meugh.


    Carynne trembled. She didnt want to die. She didnt want to forget.


    Remember and run away.


    But where? How? She couldnt even go to the vige without a carriage. Carynne cried in frustration. But her crying didntst long either. <i>Mom is too much.</i> But Catherine was already dead.


    Carynne desperately wrote, beginning to identify herself with her books. They were her only means of salvation, the only channel that wouldnt betray her. She mustnt forget to read. Carynne clung to that one thing. The book, the book, the book. <i>The words Ive written.</i>


    I am as much a book.


    This is as much my life.


    Whats this?


    But when the maid found it, that too ended.


    Milord, the Miss wrote this


    Give it back! Thats my diary! Its private!


    The fief lord slowly flipped through Carynnes diary, seeing the raw anger and hatred within. He sneered bitterly.


    Catherine, she Child, your mother didnt want this. The more you do this, the more I am convinced of my actions.


    Dad, Dad, you know I sometimes want to kill Mom.


    Carynne, you forgot again.


    Then, the lord threw the diary into the firece. <i>No!</i> Her scream was swallowed by the fire. The fief lord spoke to Carynne, who was in tears.


    Your mother already died years ago.


    With a grim expression, the fief lord instructed Nancy.


    Tell her brighter, happier love stories instead of such dark tales. Let my daughter yearn for love.


    Yes, Milord.


    Nancy ordered various romance novels and read them to Carynne every night. Initially, Carynne fiercely resisted.


    Dont tamper with my memory!


    But even her shouting was short-lived. She soon forgot.


    Once upon a time


    Lying in bed, Carynne asked Nancy with a tired voice. Her hands and feet were tied to the bed. She was exhausted. Carynne couldnt understand her maid.


    Did you prefer living like this? Werent you a free gypsy before?


    <i>Why give up your freedom to torment me?</i> But Nancy shook her head, giving Carynne a kiss of pity on her forehead. <i>Miss, you dont understand anything. What its like to live outside. The uncertainty of life. I prefer restraint. Restraint brings protection.</i>


    I dont starve, and living in this mansion is enough for me. And Miss, dont be too scared. You have nothing to fear.

 Chapter 201

    Chapter 201


    You dont even believe what <i>youre</i> saying.


    Thats not important.


    A dark hand swept over Carynnes hair. Funnily enough, the touch feltforting. And then, Nancys voice began to seep into Carynnes ears, slowly but mercilessly.


    Its okay, its okay.


    Just ept it. Live simply. You are truly beautiful, after all.


    Now go back to sleep.


    Its okay.


    Everything frightening is just a part of a dream.


    All the sadness belongs in a book.


    You are dreaming, Miss.


    This world is almost like a dream to you.


    Soon, you and the knight will fall in love.


    And all your hardships will end.


    * * *


    I am me!


    Mom has gone mad, Dad too! Even in death, Mom tries to control me!


    Carynne, clutching a rope, ran out to the garden. She couldnt live like this. It couldnt end this way. It had been a year since she regained her memory. Until yesterday, she believed she was the protagonist in a book, insisting in her diary that she must escape to find her real self somewhere else.


    A crumpled diary page from the back of a drawer brought back painful memories, but she feared they wouldntst. If she lost her memories again, who knows how long it would be. Carynne was utterly sick of it all. She wanted to die while she still remembered who she was.


    Carynne didnt believe in a life after death. It was unthinkable. But her parents incessantly believed it, iming it was inevitable that she would die, and that erasing her memory would help. The more she expressed her resentment, the more they were convinced they needed to erase her memory. Taking drugs and listening to lubies made her calm and obedient.


    Every time Carynne recovered her memories, her rebellion grew more violent, leading to self-harm and suicide attempts. If she forgot this time, she might truly be lost to herself.


    Lets die.


    While Im still me.


    <em>Argh!</em>


    Carynne slipped, mud sshing everywhere. Tears streamed from her eyes.


    <i>Hiic hiic</i>


    Carynne tied the rope to a tree, forming a noose. This should do it, she thought, recalling illustrations from melodramatic novels the maids read. Even without her own identity, such memories remained. It was a relief. Carynne ced her head inside the loop.


    Take that, all of you!


    Why


    But Carynne fell. The knot wasnt tied tightly enough due to herck of knowledge. The rope left a gash on her neck as it fell to the ground. Carynne stood and cried. She was now sixteen years old. Years had passed since her mothers death. Her memory was fragmented, mostly spent in ignorance.


    She looked up at the mansion.


    How long can I remain myself? Does turning seventeen mean its my birthday? Would it be a sess if I die today or tomorrow?


    But after another failure, she was afraid to die again. Her throat hurt.


    How long can I be me?


    I fell into a novel.


    To escape this book, I must fall in love. True love. And then I will be happy. This book is a romance novel. If I find true love, I will have all the happiness in the world.


    Its okay.


    The garden was wet with rain. Carynne shivered with cold. Home, I must go home. Its cold. She almost tripped over the rope at her feet but managed to get to her room. Strangely, she knew which one was hers.


    * * *


    I think Mom wasnt quite right in the head.


    Miss, dont talk about Madam Catherine like that. She was a good person.


    Nancy, who had received a home, sry, and respect from Catherine, wanted to repay her kindness in her own way. But Carynne replied with a voice tired of Nancys loyalty.


    So, you think my mother was normal? Drugging and brainwashing her daughter like this?


    See.


    She thought she knew the reason.


    Catherine, too, had been entangled with a powerful and insane man like Gueuze.


    But back then, Prince Gueuze was the most eligible bachelor in the country. He was the future king, handsome, and he loved Catherine. Perhaps Catherine wouldnt have been satisfied with any other man.


    Carynne knew all too well that choosing a man based solely on character was foolish.


    But Gueuze was much too insane.


    Catherine suffered at his hands, and like Carynne, she had repeatedly faced death. She must have been disillusioned with the endless fear of death and the idea of escaping through pregnancy.


    Carynne understood why her mother acted the way she did.


    That didnt mean she approved of it as another victim herself, though.


    How many times had Catherine died trying to escape him? Carynne wondered.


    How many times did Mom say she died?


    She never said anything about that.


    I see.


    How many times have <i>you</i> died, Miss?


    Nancy asked. Carynne frowned, thinking. How many times was it?


    Maybe a hundred and six?


    Such a delusion Thats very specific.


    Carynne sighed, looking at Nancy who still didnt believe her.


    Nancy had her own kind of affection for Carynne, evident in her meticulous care. But she also harbored arrogance, the product of inferiority from her origins and the pride of being able to manipte Carynnes mind. Thats what led her to subtly look down on her.


    It wasnt pleasant, but Carynne was too tired to engage in another life-and-death struggle with a pistol. Nancy wouldnt betray her as long as she was wellpensated.


    Carynne had tried to approach things this way and that, but at the end of the day, it was enough to just tolerate it and move on. Age seemed to have made her more lenient.


    <i>Haa</i>


    Carynne flopped onto her back. She rolled around in bed. What should she do first this time? She wanted to live more leisurely before Raymond arrived. Just knowing someone remembered her changed her so much. What if she couldnt seed again next time?


    Dying in Raymonds embrace, likest time, didnt seem so bad.


    Miss, acting so childishly at your age?


    ying caterpir.


    Carynne wrapped herself in the nket and retorted. Nancy gasped and then unwound the nket Carynne had curled into.


    Dont act so childishly. I didnt raise you like this.


    You entered this house when I was already grown. Who exactly did you raise?


    <i>I know that my nanny was Missus Deere when I was young.</i>


    Carynne replied, and Nancyughed awkwardly.


    Remembering even that, are we?


    Anyway, I wont cause trouble anymore, so dont try to brainwash me. As I said, Ill pay you more.


    Alright, alright.


    Nancy nodded. For her, seeing Carynne so stable, it made no sense to force brainwashing and forcefully feed her medication during her cries and screams.


    Though Carynne was still talking about her delusion ofing back to life after dyingwhich Nancy couldnt believeshe was showing a stable side that Nancy hadnt seen in a long time. And with the promise of extra money, Nancy was more than willing to betray the fief lord and side with Carynne. After all, she had grown more attached to the Carynne she had cared for.


    So, what are you going to do? Your birthday ising up, Miss, and Lord Dun will be here. You have an engagement ceremony nned.


    Should she meet Dun? Carynne felt like a lead weight had lodged in her chest. <i>That bastard.</i> She gritted her teeth. The biggest problem was that he couldnt even remember.

 Chapter 202

    Chapter 202


    And because he blindly believed in repetition and immortality, no threat or torture worked on him. It was frustrating, and she didnt even want to see him. Torture would do nothing and would just tire her out. After five consecutive failures, she had to think of a different approach.


    Am I barren?


    Pardon?


    Ah, that was too sudden.


    Carynne spoke to Nancy again.


    Do you think Dun made me barren? Did Mother have something to do with that?


    I dont really know


    Not much help there.


    Its sad to think that way


    Im the one who wants to cry, so dont even start.


    Oh my, my.


    Had Dun made Carynnepletely barren?


    She had been with Raymond for months, yet no pregnancy. She had eaten only the meals Raymond prepared during that time. She suspected Dun had tampered with her food to force contraception. But having spent that much time with Raymond at the Tes Manor, she thought she should have conceived.


    Perhaps what Dun did to her body was further back than she thought.


    Carynne twirled her hair.


    If Dun had indeed made herpletely barren, then there was no solution. Carynne and Raymond were trapped in this perpetual time loop.


    Neither of them wanted that. It wasnt that they were desperate to die right away, but being only the two of them was not enough. They wanted to live in the world together, not be forever suspended in a world of their own.


    But really.


    How did Raymond manage to remember her?


    Carynney down, swinging her legs and resting her chin on her hands.


    There were much too many mysteries.


    For starters, Im not getting engaged to Dun.


    Oh my, really? Wouldnt it be better to get engaged first, even if you n to break it offter? The invitations have already been sent out.


    Send out notices postponing it. Im not getting engaged to that guy.


    Um


    Nancy looked troubled, not knowing what to do. Carynne realized that Nancy was just a maid, and she ultimately wouldnt be able to convey Carynnes decision to break off the engagement.


    So, she got up from the bed.


    She had to speak directly to the fief lord to settle this.


    * * *


    Dad!


    Carynne burst open the door and deliberately shouted. It was a childish way to seize the initiative. The fief lord, sitting in his study, looked up, his expression awkward as he watched Carynne stride in.


    Uh, yes, Carynne. Its been a while.


    Why has it been a while? We live in the same house.


    Milord, the Miss she


    Nancy tried to speak to the lord with a hesitant nce. Carynne looked at Nancy and put her finger to her lips. <i>Shh, just stay quiet.</i>


    I remember now.


    I see.


    As the fief lord signaled the attendants behind her, Carynne raised her hand and spoke out. <i>Absolutely not.</i> If she lost her memory again, everything she had umted would vanish. That was uneptable.


    Im fine now. My mind is very clear and stable.


    People watched. Carynne smiled broadly and spoke again.


    Im serious. Im really fine.


    It took a while to convince the fief lord.


    * * *


    First of all, Im not getting engaged to Dun.


    The fief lord shook his head.


    Dun isnt a bad choice. Your mother and I chose him after careful consideration. And with his age and family connections, hes likely to be my sessor. Marrying him is the most suitable option. Besides, he took care of you since you were young, and you dont know how actively he supported Catherines ns.


    He knows too much, and thats the problem. Thats why he fed me tranquilizers and contraceptives. Maybe he even made me barren. Once, he even tried to drop me from a tower.


    Carynne felt a headacheing on just thinking about all that. Should she just kill that guy one more time?


    He promised to willingly break off the engagement if you said you loved someone else. Such understanding is rare in a young man.


    <i>Understanding?</i>


    Carynne struggled to stay calm. Losing her temper here would be the end of her. Men ready to subdue her lurked behind, and Nancy, who would ultimately obey the fief lord, stood beside her.


    Calm down.


    Not getting engaged to Dun is more important.


    She hated even the thought of seeing that assholes face.


    Well, tough luck.


    Carynne responded with determination.


    * * *


    The fief lord was at a loss. Carynnes demand was, in a way, reasonable. But he and his wife had long-nned something else. Catherine liked Dun because she believed he trusted her, but the fief lord had more pragmatic reasons to favor him.


    Dun was the next in line to be the lord of this domain. It was a natural session byw. Since the fief lord had no other children besides Carynne, the position would naturally go to Dun, a close male rtive. While Carynnes husband would have some rights, the lordship was always meant for Dun. The fief lord doubted whether Carynne could marry any other normal man.


    Shes my daughter, but isnt she sick?


    Carynne was beautiful, but at the same time, she was prone to crying fits, seizures, and memory loss. She also relied heavily on medication. Thats why the fief lord preferred Carynne marrying Dun, who knew all about her situation and could take care of his daughter.


    Most daughters in Carynnes position married the next lord to remain in the house. For future lords like Dun, such marriages solidified their position. It was a mutually beneficial arrangement.


    But Catherine had wanted Carynne to find true love.


    Will you grant my request?


    Of course.


    Catherine had no reason to choose him, the fief lord thought.


    If it wasnt for love, there was no reason at all. She had many prestigious suitors. A kings consort was always better than a peasants wifethis was a universally agreed truth.


    Father. If you respect Mother, and if you respect me, please postpone the engagement.


    Carynne was adamant. The fief lord sighed deeply when his daughter brought up Catherine. She was right. As much as it made sense for Carynne to be engaged to Dun, his priority was Catherines request. Carynnes true love.


    I wont force the engagement.


    The fief lord replied. Even in Carynnes eyes, she could see that her father also seemed reluctant about Dun. He was a useful rtive but not the ideal son-inw.


    Please cancel mying-of-age celebration too.


    Is that necessary? Its an important event marking your adulthood. Many important rtives will be there. And


    Carynne shook her head.


    There was no one importanting to her birthday. She knew that from repeating it so many times. The rtives who came were just rted to her father, critiquing her appearance and gossiping about her being with Dun. They were of no help to her, merely important to her father. They werent people who would be beneficial to her in the long run. Carynne didnt want to spend time with such people this time.


    I dont want to. Father, you might not believe me, but,


    I believe everything. I believe all your mothers words.


    The lord hastily said. Carynne smiled inwardly.


    So youre saying that you <i>really</i> believe everything that I say?

 Chapter 205***https://www.patreon.com/subliminalwayfarer

    Chapter 205***https://.patreon


    G-Goodness! Whats going o W-Who are you?


    This is the Fief Lords daughter. Dont make a fuss,


    Borwen admonished the startled bakery owner. <i>Wow, I cant believe how he talks</i>, Nancy whispered.


    Carynne poked an elbow at Nancys side and then approached the man.


    Is there a boy named Tom here?


    Her purpose foring here was to see that boy.


    But Nancy and Borwen, who hadnt heard about this boy before, had the same baffled expression as the man in front of them.


    Yes?


    He helped me out some time ago. I want to see him. Where is he?


    The bakery owner looked at Carynne with a puzzled face, then turned to Borwen behind her, who was equally clueless.


    What do you mean someone helped you, Mdy? Youve hardly ever um been out before


    Nancy also tried to ask, but Carynne did not respond.


    Call him out.


    As Carynne stood waiting, the man went outside to call Tom. Then the door opened again, and a small, scruffy-haired boy entered. He was dirty and skinny, with big eyes. He didnt resemble his father at all. But Carynne knew how venomous those eyes could be.


    While thinking briefly about the past, she smiled broadly.


    Hello, Tom.


    <i>Its been a while.</i>


    And Carynne was d to see the boy. As she smiled with delight, the warmth-starved boy approached her, hesitatingly speaking.


    Did you call for me?


    Yes, thanks for helping me outst time.


    Tom looked bewildered. It was natural. The time he had pleased Carynne had been five deaths ago. But that fact didnt change the past where he had brought joy to Carynne. Thats why she purposely sought him out. She did not forget the past.


    She was the kind of person who kept her promises. And now, the easiest act of kindnessy right before her.


    Carynne, still smiling, took off her gloves and extended her hand to Tom.


    Wont youe with me? Im grateful towards you, and I want you to work at the mansion.


    Pardon me?


    Toms eyes widened in surprise. Borwen and Nancy beside her were startled and tried to dissuade her, but they couldnt change Carynnes decision.


    Dont you want toe with me? If not, I cant force you.


    No, no! I want to go! But I


    Tom was slightly scared by the unforeseen fortune.


    I really want to go.


    Tom looked frightened but didnt miss the opportunity presented to him. Even if Carynne was mistaken, it was fine for him. He dly epted her offer.


    * * *


    Nancy kept babbling.


    Mdy, do you know how much I wanted toe to the mansion?


    Youre working there now, so thats good.


    Do you know how hard it was to even get in?


    No, I dont.


    Nancy seemed discontent with Carynnes decision to bring Tom into the mansion. Now that she thought about it, it was the first time she had brought Tom to the mansion so early. Usually, she took Tom in after she found herself in danger, after the dead Thomas had concerned her.


    Mdy, you wouldnt understand, but for someone like me, a wanderer, someone like Tom who has his own home is an enormous fortune. People like us cant settle down. So, when Lady Catherine took me in at the mansion, it was really a huge fortune. And I worked really hard.


    Nancy continued to grumble, seemingly upset about bringing Tom in without any good reason. She thought she had grabbed an immense fortune after much hardship, while this boy Tom had just effortlessly grabbed his fortune. Nancy disliked that even her fortune seemed diminished.


    Carynne saw through Nancys feelings. Indeed, Nancy was a bit selfish.


    Are you jealous of that boy?


    I just cant ept it. Mdy does His Lordship know about this?


    Father will have to agree.


    Carynne knew well that her father was a person who would relent when pushed.


    Nancy, if we leave that boy here, hell end up dying at the hands of that man we just saw. Do you think thats right?


    .


    Nancy didnt say anything more.


    And Carynne had to clench and unclench her hands at the womans audacity. Her hands were tingling.


    So dont be jealous of that boy.


    <i>He has already lived miserably enough.</i>


    It was a mere whim. Carynne knew her actions werent purely altruistic. Just as when she startedmitting murders, this was another lifes choice she was making. But this time, she actually wanted to do it.


    The coin was gone now. Carynne had to think and decide for herself.


    * * *


    Trying to live kindly after havingmitted murders?


    In fact, it wasnt so drastically different. The life of a decent and kinddy was something Carynne had attempted several times. But thinking of it as a real life and not a life inside a novelthat there were others apart from herselfmade her heart flutter as if she had trulymitted murder.


    This seems good, too.


    Carynne pondered with the bottom end of a quill pen against her mouth. The days awaiting Raymond were thrilling, and she nned to live fully until he arrived. Every day was new. Although it had only been three days, she tried to live each moment diligently.


    Tom was receiving plenty of affection as a carriage pageboy. He wasnt around her much, but the older servants, appreciating his sociability and quick-wittedness, adored Tom, and he, in turn, knew how to cater to their preferences. His survival-honed charm was shining. It had only been three days, but Tom had adapted as if he had been working in this ce for a long time.


    Carynne remembered Tom getting sick. But this time, since she brought him in right away, he didnt seem to be overstrained yet. Maybe this time Tom could defy fate and live. Carynne thought so. Maybe this time Tom would live. And maybe this time she would seed, too.


    Mdy, what are you doing?


    nning. Hows Tom doing these days?


    Hes only been here two days.


    I cant believe its only been three days since I woke up.


    Indeed


    Nancy was still grumbling. Quite different from Donna, who had been genuinely concerned about Tom. Carynne chuckled. In this life, Tom wasnt the son of a convict but just a boy from the slums. The fief lord had sent someone to inform Toms father, Thomas, that his son was working at the mansion and had him brought over. Unlikest time, this start was smoother.


    So that bringing that boy Tom to live at the mansion was part of your n?


    Yes.


    To be honest, I dont like it


    I know. But what are <i>you</i> doing now?


    Nancy was bending over, looking into the firece.


    Looking for gold pieces <i>Cough, cough</i>. Seems like theres none.


    She must have inhaled some dust while talking. Nancy pulled out her head and said to Carynne.


    Mdy, youre too kind-hearted to understand. Kids like him dont know how to be grateful. Bringing in that boy with such falsehood <i>Haa,</i> yes, yes. Whatever you did to him in the past, theres no need to do it in this life.


    Carynne replied with a smile.


    I want to live differently.


    Really, dont believe it. Trusting people isnt good.


    Can she be so openly distrustful? Carynne couldnt help butugh looking at Nancy.


    As a fellow woman, let me tell you. Carynne, arent you crazy.


    Carynne recalled someone she was actively trying not to remember.


    She shook her head. Shes not someone she can handle.


    But as Ise Evans was already at the forefront of her mind, what should she do now?

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    Chapter


    Saving Tom was also part of such endeavors. She intended to be more proactive in a different waypared tomitting murders.


    Carynne had saved Tom and brought him to the mansion before, but it didnt prove to be particrly helpful. Tom was just a powerless boy, and his significant change in the story only urred when she was 117 years oldthe 100th loopwhen she hadmitted murders. It seemed difficult to expect anything significant from Tom.


    However, Carynne intervened anyway, as this time she wanted to try everything again, in a more different way.


    What other good deeds can I do?


    To distribute all your wealth to the poor. Wouldnt everyone praise you if you did that?


    For that, Dad would have to die.


    All the wealth of the household belonged to the fief lord, not Carynne. The only time she could distribute the entire wealth to the poor was when the fief lord had died early that time in the past. His death was necessary for that to happen.


    However, Carynne thought that doing a good deed by killing her father didnt seem right. Nancy, seeing Carynne seriously contemting this, shook her head and said,


    Stop making such morbid jokes. I only said that in jest.


    <i>I</i> wasnt exactly joking though. Besides, I cant be the fief lord anyway.


    Carynne sighed deeply.


    What good can I do within a year?


    Love thy neighbor as thyself, so just be a good daughter to your father, and a good person to the people around you.


    Hmm


    Carynne reviewed the various lists she had made.


    To be a phnthropist, one must first be wealthy. If not by inheriting her fathers wealth, Carynne could enter high society. She could win money through gambling or exhibit her paintings at Countess Elvas salon.


    Carynne had developed top-level skills in various fields due to her long life. If Raymond cooperated, such tasks would be much easier, too. She could help a painter whomitted suicide due to poverty, or save women from Crown Prince Gueuze, the serial killer.


    There were various things Carynne could intervene in over a year.


    Which should I start with?


    However, all these ns required bypassing the uing challenge of Verdic Evans.


    Suddenly, the biblical verse Nancy recited came to Carynnes mind, but she dismissed the thought.


    No, thats not


    She felt ufortable with the idea and didnt want to follow through with it.


    <i>Rustle.</i>


    Carynne crumpled the paper and threw it away. She was making nonsensical thoughts. Why was she even considering such a thing?


    Love thy neighbor.


    Forgive thine enemy.


    Forgive Verdic Evans?


    Forgive Dun?


    Whats the point of forgiving them? They couldnt even remember their sins! They <i>hadnt</i> evenmitted them yet! Was it necessary to forgive in advance for things that had not urred yet? They did not know what their sins were, had yet tomit them, and their future actions wouldnt change.


    Forgivenessy with the giver, but Carynnecked that authority. She wasnt in a position to forgive. Forgiveness usuallyes after resolution and apology. Even if Carynne wanted to forgive now, it was impossible.


    Mdy, youre making a mess, and theres someone to clean it up right behind you


    To get pregnant, theres something else I need to do first


    Nancy made a crying sound as she looked at the piled-up paper and spilled ink, and Carynne finally stopped wasting the paper.


    Ultimately, with the prioritization of survival and the goal of pregnancy, Carynne needed to explore methods she hadnt tried before.


    Including Tom in her ns, openlymunicating with her father, and avoiding Dun were part of her new strategy.


    But what next?


    Carynne decided.


    She wanted to stop Verdic froming to the Hare estate.


    She wanted to change the oue for Ise, who was destined to die by Raymonds hand.


    She resolved to seek out a new path.


    * * *


    Carynne, can you exin to me why youre doing this right now?


    The fief lord asked Carynne with a restrained voice.


    Carynne looked at her father resolutely. Her lips were tightly sealed, and she was dressed impably from head to toe. She wore a hat and a thin spring coat, and beneath it, a dress adorned with frills and pearls. Although she wore elegant earrings and makeup, her shoes, made of cowhide, gave a slightly rugged feel to her attire.


    I hope its not what Im thinking.


    It probably is what youre thinking, Father.


    Lastly, Carynne firmly grasped arge bag in her hand. Her appearance suggested someone ready to travel far.


    The fief lord, noticing Nancys anxious behavior in the background, asked her instead.


    Nancy, exin to me why Carynne is acting this way.


    I apologized, Your Lordship I tried to stop her, but Mdy insisted on going.


    Dont think you can sway my daughter just because you lived freely. Ive paid you enough already.


    I havent done what youre thinking, Milord.


    The fief lord thought Carynne was acting on Nancys influence, developing a longing for the outside world. Carynne smirked bitterly at his assumption that she was merely Nancys puppet.


    It was the fief lord who had brought Nancy into her life. His reprimanding Nancy instead of addressing Carynne was a form of disregard.


    Father, talk to me directly. Its my own decision.


    The fief lord hesitated for a moment before giving up and turning to Carynne.


    Where do you intend to go?


    There was only one ce Carynne could be thinking of. The people who had not yet arrived, but who would soon. The tedious ones.


    I wish to meet Mister Verdic Evans.


    To stop his business dealings.


    The fief lord sighed deeply.


    Carynne wanted to halt the business. She wished to end her ill-fated connection with the Evans family.


    It was more than just a financial issue. She needed to confront a more unpleasant and sticky rtionshipshe had to focus on just one thing.


    Verdic and Ise Evans must now walk a different path, away from Carynne.


    A different life from before.


    Ultimately, Carynne had to actively disrupt Dun, who was silently watching her from behind the bookshelves, unaware of anything. To do this, she first wanted to eliminate Verdics interference. It would surely be a good deed, not only for herself and her father but also for the Evans family.


    Carynne resolved that Verdic and she must part ways.


    There was a time before when Mister Verdic Evanspletely halted his business here. Its not entirely impossible.


    Stop talking nonsense and return to your room. Carynne, you didnt have youring-of-age ceremony at home, but Ill talk to our rtives in the capital about arranging your debut into high society. Im sure someone will be willing to introduce you. You should focus on finding a suitable husband instead of meddling in business matters.


    Father.


    This isnt something for you to stick your nose in. Just go back to your room.


    Carynne bit her lip.


    Last time, the fief lord allowed her to travel because Raymond had intervened first, causing the business to be entirely canceled. This time, Carynne wanted to act before Raymonds intervention. If Raymond were to interfere with Verdics business first in this life, it would greatly deviate from the direction Carynne wanted to achieve.

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    Chapter 209***https://.patreon


    Upon opening the window, the chilly early spring breeze brushed against the tip of her nose. Until just a few days ago, not a single nt had sprouted, but now, a hint of green was beginning to show at the tips of the branches. As Carynne gazed at this, Nancy approached and started a conversation.


    ��Miss, do you really think you can stop the business once you get there?��


    ��No, it seems difficult. What kind of money and power do I have right now?��


    Carynne answered Nancy withplete honesty. There was no need to put on airs in front of Nancy. It would take months before Carynne could have any significant power.


    Nancy seemed somewhat incredulous at her response.


    ��Then, really, why are you going? What benefit is there in going to meet those people?��


    ��Do people only move when there��s something in it for them?��


    ��Didn��t you say you were tired of staying at the mansion? It would have been better to just travel to a rtive��s house. That would have made His Lordship more readily agree.��


    ��That won��t do. I��m going to meet Verdic Evans and Ise Evans.��


    This was not a simple trip. Going to the Evans�� mansion was not out of mere curiosity. If it were for curiosity, a new ce would be more attractive. But Carynne��s journey to the Evans�� mansion was to meet those people.


    ��I keep telling you already. I��ve already lived this life before, so try and think about it again with that in mind.��


    ��Um�� I��m getting more confused. If you��re not going for some benefit, then�� Ah, is your lover there? That man you mentioned, uh, Sir Raymond?��


    ��Yes. Probably.��


    Carynne nodded. Raymond was likely to be around there now. In thest iteration, Raymond dealt with Ise right away��but it wasn��t right after the loop restarted.


    During this time, Raymond would be on the battlefield. Therefore, Carynne had to meet Ise before Raymond could.


    ��I��m going there partly to meet him, but that��s not the main reason. I��m going to meet Ise.��


    ��Ise Evans, not Mister Verdic Evans? Aren��t you going to meet him to stop the business? At least to plead with him to stop the business����


    ��That��s just a superficial reason, honestly. The business is�� not my main concern.��


    ����That��s shocking. Miss, aren��t you going to help your father?��


    ��It would be good if the business could be stopped as well. But that��s not the biggest reason. I just needed a usible excuse to tell my father. If I don��t go, Sir Raymond will kill Ise Evans, so I��m trying to prevent that.��


    Carynne smiled at Nancy.


    Nancy looked at Carynne for a long while without saying a word, her face utterly bewildered.


    ��To be quite honest, I really don��t understand. If Sir Raymond is going to kill her, why are you stopping it? At least regarding the Evans�� business at the fief, wouldn��t it be better if she died? If his daughter suddenly dies, Mister Verdic would have a hard time focusing on his business, wouldn��t he?��


    ��Sometimes I think you jump to quite cruel thoughts, kiddo.��


    ����Is that something <i>you</i> should say, Miss?��


    Not exactly.


    But Carynne didn��t know how to exin herself. She shuddered at the thought of the slightest association of forgiveness and love with Verdic Evans. Yet, thinking of Ise in a roundabout way made the aversion slightly less.


    ��Were you friends with her?��


    ��No, we were almost always enemies.��


    Carynne reached out and plucked a branch. A tender pink petal was caught in her hand. It was an early blossom. Carynne toyed with the petal, thinking of a certain foolish girl.


    ��Lord Raymond!��


    That girl, who harbored feelings for Raymond.


    Ise and Carynne were never friends. Even when Carynnepletely submitted as Ise��s maid, Ise always despised Carynne.


    Ise disliked that Carynne��s family had a more prestigious lineage than her own, and she even envied the way Carynne walked or the ent with which she spoke. It wasn��t just about looks and Raymond.


    Despite having a lot, Ise always craved for what she didn��t have and didn��t hesitate to act rudely without a second thought.


    ��So, what do you want to do when you get there?��


    Carynne sighed as if to vent. It was something she didn��t look forward to, but it was worth a try this time.


    ��I want to try being friends.��


    ����Even though you said she��s your enemy?��


    Carynne murmured as she fiddled with the flower.


    She wanted to try something hadn��t done before. And that included things rted to Ise and Verdic. Even though loving or forgiving Verdic might be hard, saving Ise could be somewhat less burdensome.


    ��I��m thinking of putting into practice the saying ��love thy enemies�� in this lifetime.��


    <i>����Haa,</i> I just can��t understand you, Miss. You��re talking about your enemy.��


    ��Yes, but after tugging at each other��s hair for about a hundred years, you somehow grow attached.��


    Carynne shrugged her shoulders and continued, even as Nancy looked at her disapprovingly.


    ��And promises are meant to be kept.��


    Carynne thought of a past Nancy couldn��t remember. She had killed Nancy. And she had made a promise to her.


    ��Next time, I��ll die by your hand.��


    Carynne had kept that promise with Nancy. As she strangled Nancy, she made that promise. And in the next life, she indeed died by Nancy��s hand, with a bullet lodged in her head. Even if Nancy didn��t remember, the promise was kept.


    Somehow or another, it was pride built over a long time. She had to make goals to live by, even if it meant having no one but her own self to hold ountable.


    ��Ise, next time�� shall we really be friends?��


    Perhaps this time, the proposition of bing friends with Ise was worth trying.


    Until now, they had grabbed each other by the hair, covered each other��s heads with trash, and testified falsely in court. Several people were involved between them. There was Verdic, and there was Raymond.


    Because of Raymond, Ise was jealous of Carynne, and Verdic killed Carynne because of Ise, and again, Raymond killed Ise because of Verdic.


    But what if Carynne and Ise became friends?


    Until now, bing friends with Ise seemed nearly impossible. Ise was only satisfied when Carynnepletely ignored Raymond and submissively entered into servitude as her maid. They were never truly friends.


    Love thy enemy.


    It was a remarkably new endeavor.


    Carynne decided to try it in this life.


    * * *


    Verdic Evans sipped his coffee and closed his eyes.


    He enjoyed this rich and bitter taste. Tea was the trend in the capital nowadays. Verdic also had been involved in the tea business until now, but he was keen on introducing a new beverage. Above all, he personally preferred coffee over tea.


    The coffee��s unique heaviness overwhelmed his tongue and throat. Verdic looked at his wife and daughter with satisfaction.


    ��What do you think, Dear? And you, Ise?��


    However, Verdic��s wife, Selena, looked unimpressed.


    ��I don��t like it much. It��s too bitter. How about adding some sugar and milk?��


    ��What do you know to say that?��


    ��Not everyone is like you.��


    ��Ordinary people can enjoy this drink as well. And sugar and milk? I think people in this countryck dignity for adding milk to their tea.��


    ��You��re one of the people of this country now too. There��s still unpleasant things being said about the Evans family precisely because of that attitude.��


    Verdic turned his head away from his wife to ask Ise.


    ��I can��t trust your mother��s opinion. What do you think, Ise?��


    Ise was startled.


    ��P-Pardon?��


    Her mother quietly urged her from the side.


    ��Ise, it��s okay to speak honestly. It��s ridiculous to distribute this as is. And who would drink such dark water? Itcks dignity even in color, doesn��t it?��


    Both Verdic and Selena looked down at Ise, their faces saying, ��Agree with me, quickly.�� Ise, holding the coffee cup, swallowed hard.

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    Chapter 210***https://.patreon


    After a long moment of tension, just staring at the cup, she finally spoke.


    ��I, I don��t really�� know.��


    ��Ise.��


    ��������


    Selena clicked her tongue, but it was clear from the expression on Ise��s face as she drank the coffee that she didn��t enjoy the taste. Verdic scoffed and took another sip from his cup.


    ��These two really have no taste.��


    Both Selena and Ise shook their heads at the bitter beverage, but Verdic, who loved gourmet experiences, was different. Not only sweet and greasy vors are considered gourmet. Bitter and harsh tastes can also be stimting and bring happiness. Verdic loved his identity as a gourmet. It was something more pure and beautiful.


    The downside was that it was hard to sleep after drinking it, but for someone like Verdic, who drastically reduced his sleep and worked day and night, even this side effect was a blessing.


    ����Good.��


    Verdic savored his morning coffee, pondering when to introduce this beverage to the countess��s salon. Countess Elva was an annoying woman, but she always drew crowds and loved gossip. Her salon was always busy.


    ��After I meet Lord Hare, I��m thinking of passing the estate to you, Ise.��


    Verdic discussed his ns.


    * * *


    ��Please tell Ise Evans that Carynne Hare hase to visit.��


    * * *


    After all, most of the rights had already been transferred to Verdic. Formally, the fief lord remained seated, and the next fief lord would be a rtive, but that was merely for show.


    Ise would marry Raymond and be the realndowner there. She would get a feel for being andowner and then if, ��unfortunately��, Raymond��s older brother were to die soon, Ise would naturally be integrated into a noble family.


    ��Isn��t it too early for her to be thedy of the house?��


    ��That��s why it��s suitable. Even if one estate goes to ruin, it��s not a big problem, right? The next fief lord is said to be a clergyman, so telling him to live in the abbey will be enough.��


    One estate could be managed by Ise without causing any major issues. Although Ise was still young, Verdic had enough resources to bail her out if she ever went bankrupt. In a way, Ise would be given thend as a form of business.


    Selena nodded.


    ��That sounds like a good idea. But you��ll hold the wedding in the capital, right?��


    ��Yes. But I n to have the engagement ceremony there as well. It��s necessary to inform the locals who the new owner of thend is.��


    Ise��s eyes sparkled as she spoke up.


    ��Am I finally having an engagement ceremony with Lord Raymond?��


    ��Yes. Then, Dear, I��ll continue to choose a seamstress in the capital and send her directly to the Hare estate.��


    ��That sounds good.��


    <i>Knock, knock.</i>


    Ise��s face hardened. It was a rare moment of conversation between her mother and father, and to have it interrupted. Selena also frowned in displeasure. However, Verdic, seemingly not as bothered, stood up. An attendant quietly opened the door.


    ��What is it?��


    ��Master, a visitor has arrived. Ady calling herself Carynne Hare.��


    Selena and Ise exchanged nces.


    It was the daughter of the estate they were about to go down to. It wasn��t likely to be a good rtionship, rather it was bound to be unpleasant.


    Verdic asked with a sigh in his voice.


    ��Why has shee? Did Lord Hare send her?��


    ��Actually, a telegram arrived a few hours ago.��


    ��Whether it��s a few hours ago or now�� she��s in quite the hurry. The daughter of Lord Hare�� Did she say why she came?��


    ��That��s����


    Verdic and the attendant exchanged a few more words. Selena was slowly getting ready to leave for her room.


    ��Ise, it��s about time we get up.��


    Ise clenched her skirt in her hand.


    That girl had shattered a rare moment of family time.


    Verdic didn��t love Selena, and Selena didn��t love Verdic. But because of Ise between them, they maintained the form of a family. Once Ise would get married, such moments would be even rarer. <i>How dare she.</i> Ise bit her lip.


    ��Ise.��


    Verdic called out to Ise.


    ��Yes, Father.��


    ��What should we do since Carynne Hare hase to visit? Since we��ll be going to the Hare estate anyway, it seems right to let her into the mansion now that she��s here. Selena, when are you nning to go to the capital?��


    ��I��ll be leaving soon. Then, it would be okay for Ise to entertain thatdy.��


    Verdic nodded and continued to ask Ise.


    ��And it seems she wants to see you. She��s waiting in the reception room. She��s about your age. Would you like to meet her?��


    Though he asked for her opinion, it meant she was expected to go to the reception room.


    ��I don��t want to.��


    Ise answered truthfully nheless. At her brief reply, Verdic raised his eyebrows in surprise.


    ��Though she is the daughter of a fallen noble house, she is still the granddaughter of a Count. Even the great-granddaughter of an Archduke. It��s a connection worth noting. It would be good to meet her.��


    However, Ise shook her head.


    ��Father, how many times have you seen such people? She��s just trying to charm her way into weaseling some money for herself.��


    ��Charm, huh.��


    Verdic nodded. Many hade to the mansion asking for debt forgiveness, for terms to be renegotiated, for eptance of this or that. In the end, it was all the same. They would just say they couldn��t pay back my money.


    Of course, Verdic had no intention of being generous to Lord Hare, but he thought this girl who could add to Ise��s debutante might be useful.


    However, Ise did not want to see Carynne.


    ��Send her away. What does it matter how noble her predecessors�� blood is now?��


    * * *


    Carynne waited for a long time.


    Nancy and the coachman were not allowed into the mansion, so Carynne had to enter alone.


    ��How much longer must I wait to see Mister Verdic or Miss Ise?��


    ��Please wait a little longer.��


    They wouldn��t say Ise was unavable or what had happened. Fortunately, it seemed Raymond had not yet gone to Ise.


    ��Then, I��ll wait.��


    Carynne leaned back on the sofa, observing the interior.


    The mansion here was different from Ise��s residence in the capital. The building in the capital was avish and grand summer vi, but this mansion was more practical.


    It allowed movement with minimal pathways, and the materials inside were simpler. It felt more like a business establishment than a luxury mansion.


    Nheless, it was much more luxurious than the Hare mansion. The dark marble on the floor was something even the countess couldn��t afford.


    However, the overall neat style was contradicted by the furs on the floor and the abundance of animal heads on the walls, revealing Verdic��s hobbies.


    Carynne looked at the decapitated deer and tiger, feeling her own neck itch. She remembered the past when Verdic hade at her.


    Verdic and Prince Gueuze were somewhat simr.


    A slight chill ran down her arms.


    ����Excuse me, but the Miss seems to be unwell. It would be better for you to leave.��


    ��Leave?��


    ��Yes. There��s an inn in the vige where you can stay for a day or so.��


    ��Oh my����


    Carynne covered her mouth with her hand and thought.


    Would you look at that girl.


    * * *


    <i>Who��s</i> supposed to be sick?


    Carynne knew Ise��s physical condition well. In a while, Ise woulde down to the Hare residence in good health. But to say she��s too sick to meet someone who came to the mansion? It��s definitely a lie.


    ����Why?��


    ��Why, you ask. There��s no reason for her to want to meet you, is there, Miss?��


    ��But to dismiss me right to my face like this without any reason?��


    Carynne sulked and sat at an outdoor table in the vige with Nancy, sighing deeply. The coachman had gone to buy cigarettes, and Nancy and Carynne sat with gloomy faces, drinking water.


    ����I didn��t expect to not even be let inside.��


    Ise was more immature than Carynne had expected.

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    Chapter 211***https://.patreon


    Carynne would need to be here to persuade Raymond when hees looking for Ise. Ultimately, the reason she came here was to protect Ise, but Ise, clueless as she was, doesn��t even want to see Carynne.


    Why was that girl acting so unreasonably when they��re inevitably going to meet once they went down to the estate?


    It was difficult for Carynne to understand.


    Ise was always like this. She got angry, and Carynne couldn��t understand her. She��d get jealous over trivial things, and she��d blow things out of proportion.


    ��Shall we be friends in the next life?��


    It seems so far-fetched. How can Carynne be friends with a girl who didn��t even want to meet her? Especially when that woman was in love with Raymond?


    ��In love with Raymond����


    ��Why do you say that?��


    ��Now that I think about it, bing friends seems impossible������I told you so.��


    ����I thought it would be possible if I saved her.��


    Carynne drank some water and wiped her mouth.


    If Ise wouldn��t meet Carynne now and would get kidnapped by Raymond, then Verdic might suspect Raymond again. It was a repetition of events that Carynne didn��t want to see. She wanted to prevent that. In this life, she wanted to be somewhat cordial with Ise.


    But it��s not like Ise was likable at all.


    Carynne wanted to save her and aimed to be friends, but the path seemed distant and motivation was hard toe by. Even if she consoled herself that it was a new attempt for a new life, it was inevitable that she felt ufortable.


    Carynne gripped her cup tightly.


    ��I��m�� trying�� to save her����


    But Ise wouldn��t know that.


    Even trying to understand Ise��s position didn��t make Carynne feel any better.


    Carynne handed her empty cup to Nancy. Nancy refilled the cup with water.


    ��But I��ll seed. There hasn��t been a man I couldn��t charm. Would women be any different?��


    Ise would be no exception.


    Carynne kept drinking the cold water, making a promise to herself.


    <em>I will make it happen. Friends.</em>


    * * *


    Carynne awoke with a sore back in an unexpectedly worn-out bed. She had thought she might not be weed, but she never imagined she wouldn��t even be provided with a ce to sleep.


    ��It��s a pity. Even if the Evans mansion made me ufortable, at least the meals and beds were top-notch.��


    ��Really? I think this is pretty good.��


    ��It��s different when you have a point ofparison.��


    Even if the inn��s meal wasn��t luxurious, it was greasy and edible enough. There was roasted chicken, boiled eggs, peas, and tea. Looking at the innkeeper winking at Carynne, it seemed he did put in some effort.


    Carynne sighed and grumbled as she had breakfast at the inn.


    ��It seems the problem was that I went there empty-handed.��


    ��That might be it.��


    Ise pretended otherwise, but she was materialistic. If Carynne had shown up bearing gifts, Ise surely would have met with her. Carynne thought so.


    ��How can I be by Ise��s side in a good way? Can you imagine what kind of gift would be good?��


    ��Cash is the best gift. The best gift is always cash.��


    ��Ise Evans? To make enough cash to her liking, I��d have to sell our house and all ournds, wouldn��t I?��


    ��Ah�� That��s true.��


    Nancy pondered, but as a gypsy, imagining a gift that could win over the immensely wealthy Ise seemed hard. Carynne felt the same, and Nancy likely didn��t have a better idea.


    ��Maybe we��ll find a good gift as we wander around.��


    ��I hope so.��


    Carynne decided to first look for a gift as she started walking the streets quickly. She needed to be by Ise��s side. It was highly likely Raymond would visit her. And to meet Ise, bringing a gift seemed the most likely to seed.


    The weather was nice.


    Late morning, nearing lunchtime, the streets were bustling. Carynne set off towards a more sophisticated small town than the capital. The capital, being an old city, had its traditional charm, but this ce had been cultivated by the Evans family for hundreds of years as their support base.


    The buildings�� walls were stark white, and the roofs were uniformly red. Overall, it was a vibrant small town. Merchants on the streets solicited Carynne as she passed by. She stopped next to one of the shops.


    ��Fruit for sale! Juice, too! Take a ss at a cheap price!��


    ��Do you have orange juice? We��ll have a ss please.��


    Carynne observed a street vendor selling fruit, and Nancy quickly asked. After only having nd tea this morning, she craved something sweet. However, when Nancy tried to pay the price listed, the merchant smiled awkwardly.


    ��Oh, you have to buy two sses.��


    ��No, only one.��


    ��It��s a bundle deal, cheaper for two. If you want one, you��ll have to pay more.��


    ��What? Oh, forget it. What a cheap trick.��


    ��What did you just say?��


    As Nancy gestured aggressively at the merchant, Carynne stopped her. She didn��t want to ruin the good mood over something trivial.


    ��Just buy the two cups.��


    ��But, Miss!��


    ��It��s fine. You can drink one.��


    ��You need to save your money!��


    ��I��ll just pay for it.��


    ��Oh, thank you. Once you try it, you��ll see it��s worth every penny.��


    ��Miss, if you keep this up, those hawkers will take all your money!��


    ��It��s just two sses of juice.��


    Though Nancy grumbled, she disliked raising her voice over something so minor. The merchant began squeezing oranges into a juicer and handed Carynne a thin ss of juice. As she drank, walking away, the sweet pulp refreshed her, improving her mood.


    ncing at Nancy, who seemed to enjoy the taste, Carynne then noticed a shoe store. Stopping, Nancy asked,


    ��Are you thinking of buying shoes? As a gift for Miss Evans?��


    ��Well, I doubt Ise gets her shoes from ces like this.��


    And gifting shoes made little sense. Shoes were one of the most sensitive aspects of a woman��s attire. Ise was the kind of person who even ordered each pair of gloves from her preferred seamstress, so she likely wouldn��t appreciate shoes as a gift. And even if Carynne knew Ise well, she couldn��t remember the exact size of her feet.


    ��Then there��s no need to stay here. Let��s go somewhere else.��


    ��But I want to buy something for myself.��


    ��Miss�� your money����


    ��Ah, wee! What are you looking for?��


    ��Have you got good quality leather?��


    Carynne entered the store.


    She bought a pair of shoes made from fine sheepskin and wore them. It was rare for Carynne to buy ready-made items, but the desire to wear them immediately outweighed the wait for custom-made ones after a slight adjustment to the heels and fit.


    ��Shall we look for jewelry next? Or is there something else you��d like?��


    ��Miss Carynne!��


    Behind her, Nancy worried about herdy��s light wallet, but the immediate joy overshadowed her concerns. Carynne thought if she was in a hurry, she could always win money through gambling, so she didn��t hesitate unless it was about buying jewels at a luxurious level.


    Carynne continued to buy various items. The pleasure of spending itself lifted her spirits. Even without great value, new items, first-time conversations with merchants, and the spring weather on streets she rarely visited made her happy.


    ��It��s peaceful.��


    Walking down the street, Carynne felt light-hearted, enjoying the bright midday. The new shoes weren��t high-end but fit her perfectly. She might have spent a small fortune, but the satisfaction she felt as a result was significant.


    She had never walked these streets with such a light heart before. For decades, she had either rushed towards death or despaired and shut herself away. How narrow had her world been?


    But now, in the midday sunlit street, it was crowded with people Carynne didn��t know, except for Nancy beside her. Surrounded by unfamiliar streets and strangers, she felt a sense of peace wash over her.

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    Chapter 212***https://.patreon


    Thest stop was the jewelry store.


    Perhaps this would be something Ise might like. Moreover, this jewelry store did business with Verdic. Carynne had seen Ise conversing with the jeweler asionally in the past.


    As Carynne, with Nancy in tow, approached the door, an employee opened it and bowed politely.


    ��What brings you here today?��


    ��I��m looking for a gift for ady of my age, something suitable for a woman before her marriage.��


    An elderly gentleman adjusted his sses and examined Carynne.


    ��For someone young like you, Miss, a light ornament should suffice.��


    ��I��m looking for something for Ise Evans.��


    ��Oh, my apologies.��As soon as Ise��s name was mentioned, the man��s expression changed to one of understanding. He went inside the disy and returned with several boxes.


    ��For Miss Evans, most items are chosen in advance. However, these items have not been seen by her yet.��


    He opened each box one by one.


    ��Emerald is one of Miss Evans��s frequently chosen stones. Its green hue matches well with blond hair.��


    It was a box containing emerald earrings and a ne. Despite being minerals, the emeralds appeared vibrant with life. They were adorned with gold and silver, but the cutting specific to emeralds seemed somewhat dull to Carynne. She hadn��t seen Ise wear emeralds much when they were together. Had Ise��s tastes changed after meeting Carynne?


    ��What else do you have besides emerald?��


    ��She also greatly appreciates sapphires. And rubies as well.��


    ��She liked rubies?��


    ��Rubies are her favorite.��


    ����She liked rubies, huh.��


    Carynne held a ruby ring extended by the merchant. It was red, clear, and beautiful. A top-quality pigeon��s blood ruby. The gemstone, as radiant as the sun, wasrge and brilliant, with the small, clear diamonds on the side enhancing its red glow.


    ��Would you like to try it on?��


    ��Yes.��


    It fit perfectly on Carynne��s finger as if made for her. She thought it suited her very well as she looked down at the ring. However, what she was buying wasn��t for herself. Although Ise might have liked rubies before, the Ise that Carynne knew did not.


    And Carynne felt odd as she surmised the reason. Ise really disliked her. So much that even her favorite red gems became detestable to her.


    ��What else is there?��


    ��We have a new diamond ne that just came in.��


    ��Show me, please.��


    The ne the merchant presented was familiar to Carynne.


    ��This����


    ��It��s made entirely of top-quality diamonds. It��s overly luxurious, but there��s nothing better for a gift.��


    It was familiar.


    It was a gift from Raymond to Ise.


    Carynne lifted the ne adorned with dazzling small diamonds. Nancy��s eyes widened beside her. Carynne remembered the state in which Nancy had worn this ne before andughed.


    ��Don��t covet it. You might die.��


    ��Yes, but�� it��s incredible.��


    ��As luxurious as the previous one was.��


    ��But such an item would be good for cashing inter����


    ��Our goods are not meremodities. Each piece is infused with the artisan��s soul. This will surely create a special bond with Miss Ise.��


    The owner curtly interrupted Nancy��s words and ced the ne around Carynne��s neck. Then he held a mirror up for her. The ne was still beautiful, seemingly perfect for hanging around one��s neck. Carynne thought about the countless times through the ages as she looked at herself wearing the ne.


    And then another hand appeared in the mirror. Someone had ced their hand on her shoulder.


    ��That ne doesn��t suit you.��


    A familiar voice, a familiar shape of the hand, and a familiar scent��gunpowder.


    Carynne didn��t need to turn around to know who it was. And the person behind her could recognize Carynne without even seeing her face, too.


    ��It��s not for me. I n to give it as a gift.��


    Familiar voice. Familiar scent. But an unfamiliar ce for their meeting. It was slightly surprising but also wee. Carynne looked up to see the man��s face.


    Her golden knight, her leading man.


    ��Has it been very long?��


    ��Yes. But I��d be more than happy to say, ��It��s been a while��.��


    It was an unexpected meeting, but not an unforeseen one. Hence, the joy and happiness preceded the surprise. Carynne locked eyes with Raymond, and his gaze in his one eye softened as well.


    ��It��s been a while, Sir Raymond.��


    ��It has been, Carynne.��


    Raymond��s hand caressed Carynne��s face.


    And then he embraced her from behind.


    It was a new beginning for their meeting in a new ce.


    It felt as if the fragrance of flowers was vibrating.


    ����But, Sir Raymond.��


    After a brief hug, Carynne detached herself from Raymond, noticing Nancy and the jeweler staring wide-eyed, and scolded Raymond. She had no choice but to scold him.


    ��What happened to your eye?��


    The initial meeting required no words due to the joy, but what followed was Raymond��s face. Raymond��s eye was covered with an eye patch.


    ��I made a mistake.��


    Raymond avoided Carynne��s gaze as he spoke. The ck eye patch covered Raymond��s right eye, and a long scar was visible where the patch didn��t fully cover. Carynne whispered quickly upon seeing his appearance.


    ��Should wemit suicide and start over?��


    ��It��s not so inconvenient to necessitate that.��


    ��It seems too inconvenient if it��s permanent.��


    It might be better for her to die quickly and restart rather than starting with Raymond injured. And since they met quite early this time, it would be easy to set up the next promise. However, Raymond didn��t take up Carynne��s suggestion.


    ��We need to observe the situation a bit longer. And Carynne, as I said before, all of my efforts are for you�� you should try a bit as well.��


    Suggesting another death would be somewhat disheartening for him. Raymond scratched beside his eye patch as he spoke. Carynne sighed involuntarily. He kept telling her not to die, yet here he was, getting injured so early on, and not just anywhere but in his eye.


    ��How can you get injured at your age��! Where exactly is your mind wandering?��


    As Carynne��s voice grew loud with anger, Raymond whispered softly, aware of their surroundings.


    ��Let��s go outside to talk. It��s not good to speak too long in the store.��


    ����Alright. I��lle back for the itemster.��


    Carynne and Raymond exited the shop, feeling the jeweler��s sharp gaze. And Carynne told Nancy, who was following them,


    ��I have something to discuss with Raymond, so Nancy, let��s meet at the innter. I��ll return before nightfall.��


    ��Ah, the gentleman next to you��?��


    ��Long time no see, Nancy.��


    ��Raymond, it��s useless. Nancy doesn��t remember.��


    ��Ah, I see. Well, take good care of her in the future.��


    Raymond awkwardly turned away after trying to acknowledge Nancy. Clearly, Raymond had been a bit off since his memories returned all at once. Carynne whispered quickly to Nancy as they headed to the door.


    ��This is the man I told you about.��


    ��My goodness�� you must be kidding����


    She really didn��t believe Carynne till the end.


    Carynne shook her head once and then ced her hand on Raymond��s arm. They stepped out into the midday street.

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    Chapter 213***https://.patreon


    Walking the streets in broad daylight with Raymond was refreshingly new for Carynne, especially since they had only stayed in the mansion for the entire year prior.


    And above all, an injured Raymond was extremely fresh. His beauty couldn��t be hidden by a mere eye patch.


    However, if that essory signified a real injury, it was a serious problem. Carynne kept ncing at Raymond with dissatisfaction. After leaving the jeweler��s, heading into a deserted alley, and ensuring they were alone, Raymond stopped.


    ��I hurried out and ended up getting hurt. The doctor said I don��t need to have it removed, but it��s still uncertain how much of my vision will recover.��


    ��To think you��re making mistakes now that you never did in your youth����


    ��I��m <i>still</i> young.��


    ��That��s not the point�� Ah, seriously.��


    Frustrated, Carynne stomped on the ground. She didn��t want to berate Raymond any further, but her emotions spilled over into her actions. After stomping around with her newly purchased shoes, Raymond looked down and said,


    ����I��ll be more careful in the future.����Have you been injured before?��


    ��Yes, when my memories first returned, I stepped on andmine and was severely injured. So, this is nothing.��


    Raymond intended to downy the injury, but Carynne��s expression only grew darker. Before she could be more suspicious, Raymond reassured her again.


    ��Really, losing an eye is nothing.��


    ��It��s <i>not</i> nothing. I��ve died from a splinter leading to tetanus before.��


    ��Ah�� yes, that happened.��


    ��And before dying, my vision narrowed and I got hurt over trivial things.��


    ����It must have been painful.��


    ��Dying from tetanus was agonizing.��


    ��������


    Still, Raymond felt it was unfair. idents like these were unavoidable. Unlike thest time, where he emerged from a war zone unscathed, this time he failed.


    The haste from his immediate return and the desire to leave quickly after reliving his past life might have contributed to the failure.


    Perhaps, he thought, the n failedst time because he waste, making him rush even more now.


    Raymond hastened, and unforeseen variables led him into danger. Though he injured his eye,pared to the injuries from the shock of regaining his memories, it was minor.


    As Carynne was unaware of the scale of Raymond��s past injuries, she found the current injury shocking. But for Raymond, Carynne��s readiness to die over such injuries was more shocking.


    Carynne gave up looking at Raymond��s eye and finally said,


    ��Be careful.��


    ��I will.��


    ��See another doctor in the capital.��


    ��Yes.��


    Eventually, Carynne ran out of things to say and, looking at Raymond disapprovingly, sighed and changed the subject.


    ��How did you know I was here?��


    ����Actually, I came to buy Ise Evans a ne.��


    ��I see.��


    Raymond being here at this time wasn��t strange. Rushing a bit might have led to mistakes, but it wasn��t unusual for him to be here now. What was unusual was Carynne being here now, supposed to be in the Hare estate.


    ��Why are you here at this time?��


    ��I wanted to be friends with Ise Evans.��


    ������.��


    Carynne had to reconsider if she had made a mistake, seeing Raymond��s face harden into an expression of utter disbelief.


    ��What are you talking about����


    ��Friends. With Ise Evans. You seem surprised. It��s not like I said something impossible.��


    ��Carynne, you often tell me my jokes aren��t very good, but yours are quite something too.��


    Raymond groaned as if in pain.


    ��I wasn��t joking.��


    Raymond was at a loss for words.


    Carynne saw all sorts of expressions sh on Raymond��s face, one after another. Waiting for him to collect his thoughts, she observed as his gaze fell to the ground, then skyward, then to a wall, before finally settling back on her.


    ��Friend.��


    ��Yes.��


    Raymond asked Carynne with a face that clearly couldn��t understand.


    ��Why do you need a friend now?��


    Carynne looked at Raymond as if he had said something absurd. What was he talking about?


    ��Are you saying I should only look at you now?��


    ��Carynne, I have no one but you. And I don��t think you need anyone but me. Aren��t I enough?��


    The look in Raymond��s eyes was indescribable. It was a look of jealousy or possessiveness�� but different.


    Carynne couldn��t understand why he made such a face. Why was Raymond looking at her like that?


    ��You��re being selfish. After enjoying everything by yourself.��


    Raymond and Carynne were in different positions. While Carynne had to repeat her life for just a year, meeting the same people over and over, Raymond experienced whole lifetimes.


    As Carynne stared hard at Raymond, he frowned.


    ����That��s not what I meant.��


    ��After your advicest time, I tried staying confined in the mansion till the end. But it still failed. Is it so strange to want to live differently this time?��


    ��It wasn��t perfectst time either! Maybe this time, we could stay more perfectly just within the mansion.��


    ��Keep your voice down, Sir Raymond. This is a residential area. Is it so infuriating that I want to be friends with Ise?��


    ��Carynne!��


    ��Hush.��


    Carynne raised a finger. Raymond breathed heavily, apparently shocked by his own loud voice. He exhaled deeply as her finger brushed against his lips.


    Then, Carynne pulled Raymond closer. A slightly rough kiss followed. Both Carynne and Raymond��s emotions became intense.


    After seeing Raymond��s eyepatch, Carynne thought��so, he intended to deal with Ise this time as well.


    After they broke the kiss, Raymond asked Carynne.


    ��Why Ise Evans of all people? There are manydies of good nature in the world who could be friends. Bing friends with Miss Evans doesn��t seem like a good idea.��


    ��Isn��t there a saying, <i>love thy enemy?��</i>


    ��It��s not wise for a butcher to get attached to the livestock.��


    He deliberately chose his words with malice. Carynne was taken aback by what Raymond said, but his expression remained unchanged.


    ��Miss Evans is the best bait to divert Verdic��s attention. I don��t want to look for another method now.��


    ��Didn��t you realizest time that my death and rebirth have nothing to do with Verdic?��


    ��That doesn��t change the fact that he��s your biggest threat. Carynne, stop thinking about him. This time, I��ll send you abroad. Meanwhile, I��ll keep Verdic out of the events rted to you and look for another method.��


    Raymond bit his lower lip.


    ��If you need a friend, I��ll select well-reputeddies from society for you.��


    ��Is that how <i>you</i> made friends?��


    ����I overstepped. I apologize. But choosing Miss Evans is unwise. For your safety.��


    ��I get it. But I want to try a different way this time, and I don��t want to give up on bing friends with Ise. Other women are different from her. What��s the problem with wanting to get closer to the woman who��s been around me the longest? Will you continue to obstruct me if I want to persist?��


    <i>����Haa.��</i>


    Raymond sighed as if the ground beneath him had caved in, but couldn��t persist further and raised his hand.


    He really didn��t like it, but Raymond couldn��t break Carynne��s stubbornness. More than anything, the fact that he had insisted on his wayst time and still failed made him lose his justification.


    ����Alright.��


    Raymond couldn��t imagine Carynne being friends with Ise. Carynne herself wouldn��t have thought of it from the start, it��s only until she had to die a hundred times that the idea came to her.


    But still, she wanted to live that way this time.


    Because she had made a promise.

 Chapter 214***https://www.patreon.com/subliminalwayfarer

    Chapter 214***https://.patreon


    ��But how exactly do you n to be friends with her?��


    ��You asked the right question.��


    Carynne responded with a bright face.


    ��That��s the problem. How does one usually be friends?��


    ����Should I think of a way?��


    ��I don��t have any female friends.��


    Carynne had to admit that she had never had a female friend before. There simply hadn��t been enough time.


    The few women she met after debuting in high society weren��t exactly friend material. Carynne was, after all, somewhat of a rival, having debuted less than a year ago.


    And most noblewomen, like Lady Lianne, had known each other since childhood. Even those who came from the countryside like Carynne had their own cliques. Carynne had almost no interaction with other nobles, partly because of Catherine and Nancy, and everyone was too wary of Verdic to approach her.��I had no friends at all.��


    In a sense, she hadn��t had a real lover either.


    Carynne quickly changed the subject, not liking the look Raymond was giving her.


    ��First off, I��m nning to prepare a bribe�� No, a gift.��


    Raymond��s expression conveyed his conflict yet again.


    * * *


    ��Ise, Miss Carynne Hare hase to see you again.��


    ��Why does she keeping to see me?��


    ��She wants to be friends with you.��


    Verdic looked amused.


    He had seen many people cling to him, begging to lessen their losses. He had seen beggars cling to Ise too.


    But it was the first time ady of noble blood, albeit impoverished, hade to Ise wanting to be friends.


    Above all, <i>to be</i><i>friends</i>. Verdic couldn��t help butugh at the notion.


    Who would be friends with whom? Even if they were called friends, Carynne would end up serving Ise. The idea was quite appealing to him. He very much wanted to see Ise ordering Carynne around, just as he wanted to order around the nobles himself.


    ��As I said before, Carynne Hare has the blood of a Grand Duke. It will be helpful when you make your debut.��


    ��I don��t want to.��


    Ise turned her head sharply away.


    ��But she��s brought a gift? And it��s quite a luxurious item.��


    ��I don��t need to see it. If she��s prepared something luxurious, it only means she wants something else even more. I dislike such women even more.��


    Verdic put the ne he had been holding back into its ce.


    * * *


    ����What happened?��


    ��She didn��t agree to meet me.��


    ��I see.��


    Carynne gulped down cold water one after another. Ise��s refusal was rude, but there wasn��t much else Carynne could do except drink cold water to soothe her burning insides. Raymond looked at her anxiously.


    ��What about Nancy?��


    ��She went to the jeweler to see if it could be refunded.��


    ��Ah, will that work?��


    ��I��m not expecting much, but seeing how assertive she was, maybe it��s worth hoping.��


    Raymond, who had paid the remaining amount on Carynne��s behalf, sighed.


    ��I��ll pay you backter.��


    ��You don��t need to pay me back. Everything I have is yours.��


    ��That��s touching. I��m going to lie down for a bit. I��m exhausted.��


    Carynne limped to the bed and flopped down. Dust sparkled in the air. It was still too early to sleep in the afternoon. Since Ise hadn��t agreed to meet her, there was nothing to do. Carynne murmured while lying down.


    ��Why won��t she meet me����


    Raymond had paid more so they could move to the most expensive ce in the vige, but even so, he was not satisfied with the state of the room. The floor creaked slightly, and the bed was clean but narrow. Raymond sat down beside Carynne.


    ��Do you really want to be friends with Miss Ise?��


    ��Yes. It��s my goal for this life.��


    ��Carynne, you don��t even like her that much, so why go to such lengths?��


    Carynne turned her head to re at Raymond.


    ��That��s for me to decide.��


    ��I don��t understand. I get that you want to make friends. But why does it have to be Miss Ise?��


    Raymondpletely despised Verdic. He did not direct his anger towards Verdic��s daughter, Ise, but neither did he have any intention of whispering words of love to her.


    Every time he saw that girl, Raymond had to suppress his emotions, striving not to unleash his irrational anger.


    And after his memories returned, Raymond had to continually check whether his actions towards Ise were driven not by necessity but by a projection of his own hatred.


    Carynne��s situation was even moreplicated. Carynne and Ise could never be true friends��their rtionship was primarily defined by business interests. There was Verdic, Lord Hare, and Raymond between them, too.


    Carynne had been abused by Verdic, robbed of her birthright, and sometimes even killed by him. If Carynne had not been reborn, her life would have ended with her having been murdered by Verdic. Ise was his daughter. Why would she want to be friends with her?


    Those people were far too detestable.


    The idea that bing friends with an enemy might be beneficial was something Raymond found hard to understand. He knew Carynne��s previous life. Even when Carynne had tried to amodate Ise, Ise had never treated her as anything more than a maid. The initial attraction Raymond felt towards Carynne was born out of sympathy and guilt.


    ��I don��t want you to kill Ise.��


    Carynne responded, lying down.


    Raymond stopped in the middle of caressing Carynne.


    ��Do you dislike me because I kill people?��


    His voice seemed to tremble slightly.


    Raymond was a soldier. He had killed countless people. And Carynne had killed people in the past as well. Naturally, he hadn��t thought she would be repulsed by such actions. She hadn��t shown any signs of it before.


    So why was Carynne saying this now?


    Raymond felt himself getting anxious. What mistake had he madest time? Was it because of something trivial like a fingernail? Was she disgusted with Raymond out of sympathy for Verdic and Ise? During the times when Carynne had killed, she thought everything was justified. Had she developed a revulsion to killing after epting reality, to the point of being burdened by Raymond?


    Raymond bit his lower lip.


    The thought of Carynne rejecting him was unimaginable. He loved Carynne as much as she loved him, or so he believed. And that was a matter beyond doubt. They were the only ones who could understand each other.


    Carynne said just him alone wasn��t enough. What did that mean?


    Initially, he thought it was a matter of convenience. But it was more than that. Carynne said she also needed friends. Raymond thought Carynne alone was enough for him. It wasn��t fair.


    ��Have I disappointed you?��


    ��What are you talking about?��


    Carynne frowned and turned her body to the side. Raymondy down beside her, feeling Carynne��s skin. He wrapped his arms around her shoulders and embraced her tightly.


    ��Sir Raymond?��


    He wanted to return to their world alone. There was too much to think about in this world.


    The idea of Carynne dying over and over terrified him. But lying close together like this, the anxiousness that threatened to kill his heart seemed to subside.


    Maybe next time, they could escape more quickly. Perhaps he had acted too excessively thest time, making Carynne ufortable. Until ��that day��es, he would ensure she was surrounded by servants anddies of good character.


    Maybe this was also alright.


    Even if it was an endless eternity, if they were together, a few hundred years would pass in no time. Even with others around, only Raymond could understand Carynne, so she would always be by his side.


    ����Ah.��


    Raymond realized why he had been afraid to hold Carynne in his past life.


    Deep down, he thought it might not be so bad if Carynne lived forever.


    Carynne kept dying, but she always came back to life. Unlike the centuries when Raymond didn��t know Carynne properly, she wouldn��tmit suicide anymore, and they would continue to meet like this.


    ��Right now�� in broad daylight.��


    Carynne blushed but didn��t stop Raymond from advancing. They were still practically newlyweds. The heat they were experiencing was not just from Raymond alone. He embraced Carynne, and when she grimaced in difort, he stopped moving.


    ��Draw the curtains at least,�� Carynne grumbled.


    ��There��s no building adjacent to ours, so no one will see.��


    <i>��Ahh,</i> wait����


    Carynne grabbed the back of Raymond��s head, and their tongues entwined. Their clothes were hastily removed.


    Raymond stopped thinking further. The mind is governed by the body.

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    Chapter 215***https://.patreon


    After some time had passed, Carynney next to Raymond and looked up at him.


    ��This doesn��t seem like a good approach.��


    ��Am I not enough?��


    ��No, it��s not that. When our conversations get interrupted just to do this�� the really important things get glossed over. Do you really think we can resolve things with our bodies?��


    ����Yes. I was wrong.��


    Raymond seemed a bit flushed. Carynne poked his chest and continued speaking.


    ��Anyway, there��s no way I could hate you over something so trivial.��


    But perhaps that was because there was no one else for Raymond to love besides her. In Carynne��s world, there was no one else either. Just the two of them.


    ��Wow, Sir Raymond. Your age is showing, huh?����W-What?��


    ��People say that as one ages, one bes more cunning. Speak clearly. Why are you so uneasy? Why do you hate the idea of me wanting to be friends with Miss Ise? You��re being too much.��


    ��Is this because I harmed Miss Ise before��? You��re disappointed in me, aren��t you? Your wanting to protect Miss Ise feels like that to me.��


    Raymond felt this was somewhat unfair.


    He had never let his personal feelings towards Ise cause problems. He restrained himself because his position made it all too easy to unleash his hatred for Verdic on her. But for Carynne, his morals or beliefs seemed to hold no value.


    But if Carynne was disappointed in him, did that mean she hated him?


    Raymond avoided Carynne��s gaze, feeling a bit miserable. Carynne shouldn��t be like this towards him. She hadn��t shown such an attitude before.


    But people��s feelings aren��t formed by courtesy or obligation. Just as he couldn��t help but feel repulsed by Ise despite his attempts to be polite, if Carynne felt revulsion towards his cruelty�� If she was inclined to feel that way��


    ��I��ve killed people too, you know? Why are you digging yourself into the ground?��


    ��It��s not a matter of logic or reason.��


    ��Sir Raymond.��


    Carynne climbed on top of Raymond. He let out a slight moan but it��s not like her body held a crushing weight.


    Carynne��s eyes sparkled in the afternoon sunlight. Looking down at Raymond, she said,


    ��Think about it. Do you really think I like Ise more than I like you? That there��s someone more important to me in this world than <i>you?��</i>


    ��I can��t help but think that way. I understand you need a lover as much as you need friends. There are those for whom friends are more important, and your wanting to be friends with Ise feels to me like�� rejecting our previous lives.��


    ����You��re more than a lover��you��re apanion. That��s why I��m doing this.��


    Carynne continued, looking down at Raymond.


    ��Because I hate forcing you to do things you don��t want to do. Sir Raymond, you don��t want to kill Miss Ise. You don��t like killing people.��


    Carynne��s hand caressed Raymond. Soft emotions were evident in her voice. Then, she bowed her head. Her cascading red hair enveloped Raymond like the sun. Their lips touched and then parted.


    A gentle affection fell from Carynne��s gaze as she looked down at Raymond.


    ��I want you to do what <i>you</i> want.��


    <i>Because I love you.</i>


    At this, Raymond had to admit that his love was still somewhat immaturepared to Carynne��s.


    ��Now that you know, you feel relieved, right?��


    ��Yes. I��m sorry.��


    ��Now, think carefully about how I can be friends with Ise.��


    But that wasn��t an easy question to answer. Raymond also found it hard to imagine how Carynne and Ise could be friends.


    ��The ne didn��t seem to be the right choice. Should I consider a different gift?��


    ��It appears difficult to win her heart with a gift.��


    ��Why does Ise like you anyway?��


    ��Because I��m handsome.��


    ����Wow. Right, well, I��m pretty too. Why doesn��t she like me as much?��


    Carynne looked at Raymond somewhat skeptically. Indeed, men as handsome as Raymond were rare. Moreover, a man who was handsome, of noble birth, wealthy, and not a libertine like Raymond was even rarer.


    ��Miss Ise likes men and doesn��t care much for women.��


    ��Ah, no. I know why. It was a rhetorical question.��


    Carynne nodded, acknowledging the obvious reason.


    Ise saw Carynne as a rival. And it wasn��t just Carynne who didn��t have friends, Ise was the same.


    ��You can always abandon that goal if you dislike it. Honestly, I��d prefer it if you did.��


    ��I have to keep a promise once I��ve made it.��


    ����Did you make such a promise to Miss Evans?��


    ��I did suggest it once when I was about to kill her.��


    Carynne remembered the words she had shouted while chasing Ise through the dark corridors.


    ��What did she say?��


    ��She called me crazy and said she has no friends either. How typical.��


    ����I see. I don��t know her all that well, but she doesn��t seem like the kind of person who needs friends.��


    ��I know.��


    The biggest reason might be her father being Verdic, but from what Carynne observed, that wasn��t all.


    Ise did not need friends. She always held her nose high in front of the nobledies and had no qualms talking about money.


    What Ise needed was a maid to pamper her.


    ��But I don��t want to be a maid, even if I could be her friendter.��


    ��Of course.��


    ��Friends�� Oh, Sir Raymond. You haven��t met Miss Ise yet, have you?��


    ��That��s correct.��


    ��Well first, make sure to break up with her once and for all.��


    ��Now?��


    ��Yes.��


    Carynne advised Raymond. At the outset, Raymond must not stand between Carynne and Ise. Things could get messy if this turned into a love triangle. Carynne vividly remembered Ise��s jealousy when she saw Carynne with Raymond. To be friends, the issue of men must be clearly resolved.


    ��Maybe if Ise gets dumped by you and bes heartbroken, I could swoop in and be good friends with her?��


    ����That doesn��t seem like a good idea.��


    Raymond shook his head.


    ��Or what if you torment Ise, and I save her? I think you look coolest when you��re saving me.��


    ��Don��t you think that��s a bit far-fetched, even for you?��


    ��That could make it even more magnificent!��


    ��Please stop.��


    Raymond sighed.


    But Carynne was right. If Carynne wanted to be friends with Ise and killing or kidnapping her was off the table, then Raymond needed to break up with Ise properly first.


    <i>����Haa.��</i>


    Still, that seemed unlikely.


    Raymond felt a headacheing on just thinking about how to break things off with Ise.


    Ise had never let go of Raymond before.


    * * *


    As soon as Raymond��s memories returned and a new life began, he knew he had to go to Carynne first.


    Initially, he had no intention of being a threat to Ise. She was Verdic��s daughter, but that was all. Until then, Raymond had clearly distinguished his targets of anger.


    ��Carynne.��


    After parting ways with Ise as soon as possible, the first thing he knew he needed to do was be reunited with Carynne.


    So, Raymond set off to buy the ne again, but this time it was a parting gift for Ise.


    Here, in front of her, he watched as her face lit up in unbridled happiness as she received the ne.


    However, her expression soon hardened as Raymond spoke.


    ��What did you say just now?��


    ��There is a woman who I love. Therefore, Ise, I cannot marry you.��

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    Chapter 216***https://.patreon


    Raymond spoke with nothing but utmost sincerity.


    After enduring many years��growing old, dying, and then being given another chance��he knew he needed to find Carynne quickly. To him, Ise Evans seemed naively young.


    Raymond hoped Ise would find a different life. Verdic, however, had to be killed.


    ����Who is that woman?��


    ��I cannot tell you.��


    ��If you don��t tell me who she is, I cannot let you go.��


    ��Ise!��


    He couldn��t bring himself to utter Carynne��s name.


    He remembered Carynne being killed by Verdic dozens of times. If he spoke up, Carynne would be in danger.Raymond tried to hold Ise��s hand, however she violently pulled her hand away. mes of anger flickered in her eyes as she red at him.


    ��It seems promises are a joke to you, Lord Raymond.��


    ��She��s someone I truly love, with my life on the line.��


    ��And I have no intention of letting you go, even if it kills me.��


    What he experienced at <i>that time</i> was the worst.


    When Raymond couldn��t persuade Ise and arrived secretly at the Hare mansion, Carynne had alreadymitted suicide by shooting herself in the head.


    It was the first time she had ever seeded in taking her own life.


    Raymond stood silently by Carynne��s grave, repeatedly whispering her name.


    He had rushed his entire life to reach Carynne, only to find that she had already moved on to the next life.


    ��You belong to me.��


    Ise would not let Raymond go.


    It always took a longer time, and after Carynne��s death, even greater vengeance took hold of Raymond��s heart. The Saytes estate was hit by another epidemic, and Verdic did everything to cut off Raymond��s political influence.


    Raymond eventually seeded in his revenge, but without Carynne by his side, happiness eluded him.


    He had to die to meet Carynne again.


    * * *


    iming to have someone he loves and asking to be let go only fueled Ise��s anger further. So, in his second life, Raymond chose a different approach.


    When Raymond woke up in this life, he became even more anxious. Carynne mightmit suicide again. If Carynne had immediately attempted suicide with a gun upon waking upst time, she might try to verify her death multiple times. He had to hurry.


    Raymond moved at once.


    Then a loud explosion shook the ground. <i>BOOM!</i> A deafening noise followed. A sharp ringing sound rang in his ears, but the severe pain that came was even worse.


    <i>��Kuhh�� ugh�� aaagh!��</i>


    He had stepped on andmine. One of his ankles was blown off. Raymond gritted his teeth, tears and blood streaming from his eyes. Due to the severe injury, Raymond was forced into early retirement.


    A soldier losing a foot was not something that could be brushed off as ��fine��. For the rest of his life, he would have to live with a prosthetic leg. The myriad lost opportunities, endless pain, and severe suffering hit him hard.


    What kept him going was Carynne. Because she was there, even if only as a ghost by his side, Raymond could focus on Carynne more than his missing part.


    ��I��ve died ande back to life multiple times.��


    ��So have you.��


    Would Carynne be disappointed in him? Would she turn away from him, seeing him as less for not being able to help? He <i>must</i> meet her. The woman who filled his thoughts, more than the shame or pain, was someone he <i>needed</i> to meet.


    This injury would hasten his retirement. At least there was some sce in that. And Ise, in front of him, was an obstacle. Raymond red at the woman who had dragged Carynne to the gallows with false testimony in his past life.


    ��L-Lord Raymond.��


    ����Miss Ise Evans, this is a warzone. Please go back. I will soon return to my homnd. Why are you here? For someone like you to be here could lead to great harm�� ugh����


    Raymond clenched his teeth. The pain surged again. No amount of medication could help. Ise covered her mouth with her hand, repulsed by the smell of blood, then removed it to breathe and asked,


    ��Are you okay?��


    ����It��s tough.��


    Raymond responded as if chewing on his words.


    ��I saw Carynne Hare kill someone.��


    It was her words that led to Carynne��s death.


    Raymond, looking at Ise��s slender neck, thought about how good of a position he was in to take his revenge right here and now.


    However, he knew it wasn��t right to bring it up at that moment. Raymond clenched his teeth. Ise flinched in surprise.


    ��Do you�� dislike mying here?��


    ��Go back, Ise Evans. Mister Verdic Evans already called off our engagement.��


    Verdic did not want Raymond, now disabled.


    He didn��te in person and ended it with a brief telegram. But that was for the best. Although Ise hadn��t seen the extent of his injuries yet, she wouldn��t want a ��defective�� product like him, missing a leg. However, Ise shook her head vehemently.


    ����I don��t want that! I-I will not break up with you over such a trivial reason!��


    ��You will find a better man.��


    Above all, Raymond didn��t want to be with her. He wanted to ensure his anger and desire for revenge didn��t spill over onto her. Raymond was intent on killing Verdic. What use was keeping his daughter by his side?


    Moreover, he couldn��t suppress his growing ferocity towards her.


    But Ise repeatedly shook her head, tears welling up in her eyes.


    ��Lord Raymond! You don��t need to force yourself to say such things for my sake��!��


    ��I truly do not want to marry you.��


    ��I know. But I will stay by your side and help you.��


    Words would not work. There was no getting through to her.


    * * *


    ��A clean break����


    ��Pardon me, sir?��


    ��It��s nothing. Where is Mister Evans?��


    ��He said that Your Lordship can see him after you spend some time with Miss Ise.��


    ��Alright.��


    Unlike Carynne, as soon as the servant ryed the message that Raymond had arrived, he was able to meet Ise immediately.


    ��Lord Raymond! Are you hurt?��


    ��It��s nothing. Just a minor injury, don��t worry about it.��


    ��My goodness��! It��s been so long. I didn��t expect you toe straight home, pleasee in.��


    Ise hurriedly ran towards Raymond, clutching her skirt. It had been over a year since shest saw Raymond.


    Raymond bowed his head towards Ise.


    ��Good day, Miss Ise Evans.��


    How could he break things off with her without issue?


    Raymond broke into a cold sweat.


    * * *


    Even after saying he had someone he loved, even after asking to be let go because he was disabled�� It was all useless.


    Ise had far more money, and all he had were his lineage and honor. Still, it wasn��t about what he could offer to her.


    Raymond felt his head might explode trying to figure out how he could properly part ways with Ise and how Carynne and Ise could be friends.


    If he asked to borrow money, Ise would give it all to him, and if he met another woman, Ise would direct her anger not at Raymond but at that woman.


    Why did Ise look at him so blindly while showing not a single ounce of sympathy towards Carynne?


    As Ise led Raymond to the greenhouse, boasting of the fully bloomed roses, various flowers were blooming inside, despite it being early spring. Ise pointed to a double rose and said,


    ��The gardener created this new variety. Isn��t it beautiful?��


    ��Indeed.��


    Now inside the greenhouse, Raymond looked down at the crown of Ise��s head while engulfed in thought.


    Carynne had been considerate of him, but for Raymond, it would have been easier and morefortable to simply kill Ise and Verdic. He couldn��t throw away the kindness that his wife��his god��had shown him, but he had already be a person who found murder easier.


    Taking someone��s life was hard the first time. The beginning of sin was always going to be heavy. Once you begin not to mind the means, everything else follows quickly.


    But this time, Carynne pushed him back onto a brighter path. If she wished, Raymond would have to walk a different path again, no matter what.

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    Chapter 217***https://.patreon


    ��Miss Ise Evans.��


    Ise turned towards Raymond, her eyes sparkling with anticipation. Raymond remembered another girl with such hopeful eyes. But he could not fulfill Ise��s expectations.


    ��I will not marry you.��


    He had to say it.


    Raymond looked at Ise silently.


    ����Why?��


    Ise��s voice cooled significantly. Raymond thought of various reasons he had given before. Another woman, wealth, his injuries��none had helped in breaking off their rtionship.


    ��After my injury, I��ve given it a lot of thought.��


    ��An injury like yours isn��t serious. It��s very considerate of you to worry about such things����<i>But I��ll never let you go.</i>


    Ise��s eyes seemed to say that.


    ��No, this isn��t out of consideration for you. I��ve decided I cannot waste my short life on you.��


    ����I, I don��t quite understand����


    ��Miss Ise Evans, I dislike you.��


    Raymond spoke calmly.


    No other excuse had worked. And no matter what he said, Ise interpreted it in a way that suited her.


    What exactly was the reason Ise liked him? Raymond thought it was because of his appearance. And his lineage. Those were things that Raymond could not change. But if it involved tarnishing his honor or proper etiquette, that he could do.


    Raymond cleared his throat.


    ��I despise Verdic Evans. Your father is who I consider to be the worst person in this world. He ruined my family.��


    ��Do not speak ill of my father! Don��t you recognize the favor he��s done for you?��


    ��Why must I repay Verdic? The outbreak of the gue in the Saytes estate was caused by thend development project of the Evans family.��


    ��Don��t make baseless usations!��


    But it wasn��t a baseless usation.


    The suspicions that Marquis Penceir had about Verdic Evans�� activities had be more apparent over time. Verdic��s main business was arms dealing, but he dabbled in various fields.


    He did not shy away from experiments on human bodies. Even if Verdic had once moved to save Carynne in a previous life, at the core of that many evil. He would stop at nothing for the sake of umting more and more wealth.


    ��Soon, Duke Luthe will visit. Mister Verdic Evans had promised him asylum. But isn��t it ironic? The royal family would want Duke Luthe assassinated. They covet thend he owns. The one who started the dispute was your grandfather, and the one who took theirnd was your father.��


    ��If you speak ill of my father, even if it��s you, Sir Raymond����


    <i>Please, you are forsaking me.</i>


    But Ise took a deep breath again.


    ��Be serious. You must have heard rumors while meeting people in high society. How can you say such things when you��re notpletely certain about them? I didn��t think that you were so narrow-minded.��


    ��Miss Ise Evans.��


    ��I told you already! My father did not do those things!��


    Ise seemed like she wouldn��t let Raymond go this time either.


    ��You��ve been in the army for so long��you don��t know any better. Once you marry me and start living as an assemblyman, you��ll understand how the world works.��


    ��I already understand enough.��


    ��You don��t!��


    Ise Evans shouted irritably. Raymond looked down at her.


    Ise must be aware of the various illegal activities that her father, Verdic, was involved in. But stating that reason didn��t work on Ise because Verdic, and the Evans family name, was all she had to stand on.


    ��What do you know!��


    Raymond was at a loss.


    But then again, he recalled how he had been called shameless and immoral.


    So, perhaps.


    ��I know that I��m handsome.��


    ����What?��


    ��When I look in the mirror, how can I not know? There has never been anyone as handsome as me in high society. Wherever I go, I receivepliments, so it��s undeniable.��


    Ise��s eyes widened as she listened to Raymond��s self-praise. She seemed unable to grasp the situation. It was unclear whether Raymond��s boasting about his beauty was serious or a joke. Then, Raymond concluded.


    ��And in high society, numerous women have clung onto me. Much more beautiful than you.��


    ����Which women? Lady Cecilia? Or Lady Beatrice?��


    ��Who knows.��


    Raymond smilednguidly.


    ��There were too many to remember.��


    Ise��s face gradually turned colder.


    Raymond found her expression amusing. For the first time, he thought this might work. So, he added another line, one that even Carynne would find absurd when she heard it.


    ��Therefore, your face is not enough for me. I��m the kind of man who only looks at faces.��


    * * *


    Ise was furious. While she had gone red in the face when Raymond had spoken ill of her father, the direct criticism of her appearance almost made her roar in anger.


    ��What did you just say!��


    ��Die!��


    Raymond rubbed his numb face with something cold. One of the Evans family��s servants had brought him a cold water bag. Ise had maliciously aimed for Raymond��s injured eye. It was the first time the servants had seen Ise get so angry at Raymond.


    ��Why did you say such a thing?��


    Raymond sighed.


    What was this servant��s name again? He couldn��t remember.


    ��Still, you did well. It was quite refreshing. Miss Ise, she�� Um, to be frank, her face isn��t that pretty, is it? But seeing how arrogantly she behaved just because of your standing was quite unbearable.��


    Raymond smiled bitterly and returned the water bag.


    ��Thank you for this.��


    ��Don��t mention it. Then, is Your Lordship leaving without seeing Master Evans?��


    ��I��m not sure what Miss Ise will think about that.��


    Raymond stood up.


    He wanted to see Carynne. Indeed, Carynne��s face has been and will always be his preference.


    ��And you should be careful with your words.��


    ����M-Miss?��


    Ise Evans was ring daggers at Raymond from behind a nearby bush. Raymond moved on, silently mourning for the servant.


    ��Goodbye, Miss Ise Evans.��


    ��Go and die.��


    Ise spat out a curse.


    But to Raymond, her words were like a blessing. He moved on.


    ��I��m sorry.��


    For the first time, Raymond apologized to Ise.


    But the words were too soft to be heard by anyone.


    He had never seen Ise as Ise herself. To him, Ise was always a byproduct of Verdic and a means for his revenge.


    For the first time, Raymond truly saw a selfish girl throwing a tantrum. He didn��t like her, but he harbored no hatred towards her either.


    Raymond left the greenhouse.


    * * *


    ����You said that to Ise?��


    ��Yes.��


    Carynne covered her eyes.


    She told him to break up with the girl, but she hadn��t expected him to be that harsh. What if Ise would spread rumors in high society?


    But Raymond smiled brightly, with a lightness as if he had done his duty.


    ��Maybe now you can go andfort Miss Ise.��


    <i>��Ha,</i> I hope so. Wish me sess.��


    ��I will. Have you prepared a gift? Are you going to take that ne back to Miss Ise Evans?��


    ����That��s the thing.��


    Carynne closed her mouth, unable to look at Raymond. Her behavior was strange. Carynne fumbled with her words, then wrapped her head and groaned.


    ��Carynne? Are you ill?��


    ��������


    ��You don��t have a fever, what��s wrong?��


    As Carynne remained silent, Raymond turned and called for someone.

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    Chapter 218***https://.patreon


    ��Nancy!��


    If Carynne had been with her maid, that maid would know the reason.


    However, the inn was quiet.


    They had booked an additional room for the maid, but the next room was empty. Strange.


    There was enough time after Raymond had left. He had definitely informed Nancy of the change in inns. And she had left in high spirits, saying she would return the ne for a refund.


    It had been more than enough time for her to return.


    When Raymond came back from checking the next room, Carynne said in a small voice,


    ����She��s gone.��


    ��What do you mean?����She ran away with the ne and all the money.��


    ����What?��


    Nancy had sumbed to temptation once again.


    Carynne handed Raymond a note left by Nancy.


    <b>[ To my deardy,</b>


    <b>Congrattions on meeting Lord Raymond! But I too have my own life to live, right? The difference between the amount you promised and the ne was too much, so I had no choice. I wish you happiness and a long life!</b>


    <b>I will use the ne and the money to fund my new life as well.</b>


    <b>Please don��t be too angry, Mr. Terris loves me too. Please bless our future.</b>


    <b>With all my love,</b><b></b>


    <b>Nancy ]</b>


    ����Who��s Terris?��


    ��The coachman. He��s been Nancy��s favorite�� and the most dependable man working at my family��s manor.��


    <i>��Hahahaha!��</i>


    As Raymondughed, Carynne added,


    ��Just so you know, she took all of your money too.��


    ����Oh. That��s not good.��


    ��Right.��


    Now, they didn��t even have enough money to pay for the inn, let alone a gift.


    Their faces turned grim.


    ��I left the cat in charge of the fish����


    Carynne sighed and pressed her forehead. Nancy was greedy enough to steal ��Ise��s ne��. Even when she knew of Nancy��s materialistic nature, Carynne had still hoped to trust her this time, but she was betrayed so quickly.


    ��Sir Raymond, how much do you have on you right now?��


    ��As you can see.��


    Raymond shook his empty wallet. Only dust came out.


    ��It seems impossible to bring a new gift to Ise now.��


    ��How about writing a heartfelt letter instead of a gift?��


    ��With what kind of heart?��


    ��Just express your sincere desire to be friends����


    He must be joking.


    Carynne shook her head. If she were the recipient of such a letter, she would dislike it.


    ��Even if a handsome man gives it, Ise won��t ept such a thing.��


    ��I suppose you��re right.��


    Ise was ustomed to receiving only luxurious gifts from Raymond. There was no need to even ask if it was from Carynne.


    The two of them sat side by side, deeply sighing.


    ��I never imagined she wouldn��t even meet me����


    They had thought bing friends would be difficult, but it was a matter of degree. Even if Ise disapproved of Carynne, Carynne had some expectations of spending time together at the beginning, chatting as they had done before because that was the proper etiquette.


    However, this time Ise continuously refused Carynne��s visit.


    Now that Ise was greatly disappointed in Raymond, could Carynne have seeded by visiting and gifting her the ne she loved the most? Of course, that too could have failed, but Nancy had run away with the one method that might have been worth trying�� leaving only regret.


    ��What should we do about the inn fee?��


    ��We might manage by pawning something we have, though staying here any longer would be difficult. How about returning to Hare estate first and then trying to meet Miss Ise again?��


    ��It would be nice to go together with Ise on the way����


    ��Since she won��t meet you, there��s nothing we can do.��


    Carynne felt a bit down as she saw Raymond pulling out his wristwatch to look at it. She was expecting to apany Ise and Verdic back to the Hare estate, but that n had fallen through.


    ����And thinking about returning to my father without having seeded in anything makes me feel a bit depressed.��


    ��You haven��t even started yet. Life is a series of frustrations, so don��t get too down about it.��


    Ignoring Raymond��s less thanforting words, Carynne felt ashamed imagining herself returning to her father to admit she hadn��t seeded.


    She had boldly gone forth proiming she would persuade Verdic, at least foster a friendly rtionship with Ise, but in reality, she hadn��t even met Ise, and Nancy had betrayed her trust and run off.


    Perhaps she should kill Nancy one more time just to blow off some steam?


    ��Carynne, I��ll be leaving first then. Get your things ready and prepare to board the carriage.��


    ��Hold on, Sir Raymond. It seems too wasteful to return just like this.��


    ��But what else can we do?��


    ��We have to try. I must go see Ise Evans again.��


    * * *


    ��Carynne Hare is back again, Master.��


    Verdic was amused by Carynne Hare��s persistence, visiting yet again without getting tired.


    However, Ise��s condition wasn��t so good. Verdic put down his newspaper and adjusted his sses.


    ��Father! I want to call off the engagement with Lord Raymond! I won��t do it!��


    ��Ise. What are you talking about?��


    Ise was sprawled on the bed, sobbing.


    Verdic had ordered a servant to call Raymond, but Raymond had long since left the mansion. Listening to Ise��s cursing and crying, Verdic had a headache learning the whole story from the nervous servant.


    Raymond and Ise had argued, and Raymond had insulted her appearance.


    It was unbelievable to Verdic that Raymond would say such a thing, but for now, he had tried to console his crying daughter. Ise then red at Verdic from the bed.


    ��It��s all your fault! Why didn��t you make me prettier! And to choose a man like Sir Raymond. You really have no eye for people!��


    ��How is that my fault? And you were the one who liked Sir Raymond!��


    Attempts were made.


    But Verdic wasn��t generous enough to tolerate his daughter��s immature tantrums. The reason for her outrage being her appearance was ridiculous.


    The money spent on Ise��s hair, skin care, body shape maintenance, clothes, and essories was enormous. Not even Ise��s mother had spent that much.


    Verdic said Raymond wanted to break up over her appearance, but Ise seemed not to listen properly. The aspect Raymond pointed out was something Ise had always been sensitive about.


    ��You��re pretty enough.��


    But Isey there, pretending not to hear. Irritated, Verdic mmed the door. He hadn��t thought Raymond would actually break off the engagement.


    ��Let Ise decide on the matter.��


    Verdic was tired of hearing Ise��s whining. Anything that could divert Ise��s attention would be good. It might even be beneficial for her to spend time taking out her frustration on Carynne Hare.


    With Verdic��s permission, the servant bowed.


    ��Understood, Master.��


    * * *


    People be fond of others for various reasons. Therefore, Carynne decided to try a method she had never attempted before.


    ��It might just work.��


    ��Carynne, honestly, I find it hard to agree.��


    ��It��s worth a shot.��


    ��It would actually be <i>worse</i> than doing nothing.��


    Carynne decided to borrow money from Ise.

 Chapter 219

    Chapter 219


    ��Even if I fail, the worst I��ll get is being called a beggar or sshed with water.��


    ����Just wait a few days and I��ll gather enough money. It��s better to trust me and wait. I��ll think of something else Ise Evans might like.��


    ��Sir Raymond, stop doing unpleasant things and just watch.��


    ��Unpleasant����


    ��Lord Raymond, it��s <i>your</i> actions that are unpleasant. I mean, I know that you did it for me, but�� You went as far as kidnapping and killing her, but that method failed. I��ll handle it my way this time, in this life.��


    Raymond was not at all in favor of the idea of borrowing money, but Carynne thought it might be a solution.


    People feel more positive when they give help than when they receive it. That��s probably why parents love their children more��they give more.


    Carynne, who had never had children, wouldn��t know, but it��smonly the case. Maybe Ise would prefer being able to give something rather than just receiving gifts.


    ��Wait, Ise <i>did</i> give me gifts a few times before to show off, but.��Carynne shook her head. Giving something as a show-off and feeling gratified by helping someone in need are different. Maybe Ise would find a new sense of fulfillment in helping Carynne.


    If things worked out, this could be an opportunity to be friends with Ise.


    And if not, well.


    It was still better than doing nothing at all.


    Carynne thought so.


    * * *


    ����So, what gift did you bring this time?��


    In the bright drawing room, Ise asked with a locked voice, seeming to have cried. What kind of personal attack did Raymond unleash that the girl was left in this state?


    Perhaps listening to Raymond��s advice would have been better. Carynne gulped dryly.


    ��Actually, I couldn��t prepare a gift, Ise.��


    ����You��ve been bringing gifts continuously, and now you��re trying a different method? It��s not some nonsensical gift of the heart, is it?��


    ��To be honest, I came to ask for a favor.��


    Ise��s voice became even colder, and Carynne felt slightly tense.


    ��Could I borrow some money?��


    Carynne asked, closing her eyes tightly. Would Ise throw water at her? Scream?


    But unexpectedly, the reaction was calm, and Carynne slowly opened her eyes. Ise was looking at her with a disinterested expression. It was a face Carynne hadn��t seen before.


    ��I��m curious about the reason.��


    * * *


    Carynne borately narrated her plight with a dramatic tone.


    A maid, almost like a nursemaid to her as she had been taking care of Carynne since childhood, had eloped with the coachman, taking all her money and the ne. Carynne pitifully added that a considerable amount of money was spent on buying that ne.


    ����My goodness.��


    Ise looked at Carynne with disdain when she mentioned her financial struggles because of the ne, but she was displeased about Nancy.


    ��The maid ran away with all my money with the coachman�� Now I don��t even have money to go back.��


    ����Such people should all be killed.��


    Ise started cursing Nancy and the coachman.


    Any employer who starts keeping several servants inevitably faces friction with them, ranging from them not doing their jobs properly, taking the employer for granted, to running away with money or having affairs.


    There were many ways to be closer to someone, and talking badly about others was one of them.


    The two young women spent the time eagerly bad-mouthing the servants. The conversation dragged on as more snacks were served. Ise bit into the cookies.


    Instead of dignity, her chewing was filled with anger. In the past, Ise would not eat such fattening cookies.


    ��If you treat them well, they always stab you in the back�� I won��t let them get away with it.��


    ����Right.��


    Carynne hoped the target of Ise��s non-forbearance wasn��t Raymond, but��


    Looking into Ise��s eyes, it seemed Raymond was included.


    After a long conversation and snacking with Carynne, Ise wiped her mouth and looked at her.


    ��Fine, I��ll lend you the money.��


    ��Pardon?��


    ��I said I��ll lend it to you.��


    Ise still had a rough tone in her voice.


    ��Really? Oh, thank you, Ise.��


    Carynne��s face brightened. The light in the greenhouse illuminated Ise��s face. Her eyes were puffy, and her face had some pimples, probably fromck of sleep, but still seemed to shine.


    Life really was long and full of surprises. Could this lead to a friendship-like rtionship?


    But Carynne��s thoughts were interrupted by Ise��s next words.


    ��But there��s a condition.��


    <i>Of course.</i>


    Carynne felt bitter. Obviously, Ise wouldn��t just readily agree. Thinking that one conversation would create a sense of camaraderie, leading to friendship and a loan, was too much even for Carynne.


    However, things were different this time, so maybe it could turn out better. It was the first time Ise had paid such close attention to her story. Carynne was willing to meet whatever condition Ise might have. Carynne looked at Ise with hope.


    ��What��s the condition?��


    ��I��m nning to run away. Help me.��


    But this was unexpected.


    Carynne felt a chill go down her spine.


    * * *


    The issue wasn��t buying a carriage, but finding someone to drive it. Even with Ise��s wealth, no one in the vige was willing to incur Verdic��s wrath by doing something <i>that</i> bold.


    Everyone in the vige knew Ise��s face, and they all refused, fearing any dangerous undertaking. Verdic was known for his thorough retaliation, so no one wanted to get involved with him.


    And Raymond couldn��t escort them himself��Ise would definitely refuse. Raymond considered wearing a wig, but he couldn��t hide his body, height, or voice.


    In the end, he had to ask someone he knew��the most skilled person who woulde running for money.


    ��He��s skilled enough.��


    But Raymond��s expression wasn��t all that bright.


    It was after Carynne met Zion that she realized why.


    ��Zion Electra, at your service.��


    ��Pleased to meet you, Miss Carynne Hare.��


    ��Good day to you, Sir Zion.��


    Raymond introduced him. A young knight. Carynne could recall seeing this young man at her wedding.


    He was Raymond��s direct subordinate. They had shared a room. But in her memory, he was always severely injured, with half his face torn or burned off.


    Unlike the memorable past, Zion��s face now could be called handsome. Was it because Raymond was injured? Carynne felt strange. It��s as if the two men��s roles had been reversed.


    ��You��re Sir Raymond��s subordinate?��


    ��Yes. And you must be Sir Raymond��s secret mistress.��


    ��Zion!��


    ��Ah, whoops. My apologies.��


    Carynne blinked.


    She was thinking about whether she should be angry or not, but before she coulde to a conclusion, Raymond had already grabbed Zion by the neck.


    ��I wasn��t trying to insult anyone. Really. It��s just that meeting you in person, I can see why Sir Raymond called off the engagement. ��Mistress�� might not be the right term. Then, you are lovers, aren��t you?��


    ��Be careful with your words.��


    ��Ohh, is it one-sided?��


    ����Shut up. Miss Carynne is�� well, she��s just entangled with Miss Ise this time.��


    ��Sir, yes, sir.��


    Raymond considered punching him in the stomach but stopped himself when he saw Carynne staring at them. The slick, dark-haired man kept smiling despite the threat.


    ��Sorry, Carynne. I couldn��t find another coachman.��


    ����No, it��s okay.��


    After answering Raymond, she turned to the other man.


    ��Thank you, Sir Zion.��


    What mattered was Ise. There��s no need to pay any heed to other people.


    Carynne thought this as she firmly shook Zion��s hand.


    It was a tight grip, but that was all.

 Chapter 220

    Chapter 220


    A few dayster, Ise snuck out of her house at dawn. Her face was flushed with excitement as she climbed into the carriage Carynne had prepared.


    ��It��s my first time leaving home. It��s really thrilling. What about you, Carynne?��


    ��I feel the same, Ise.��


    <i>So thrilling I could die. I hope Verdic doesn��t use this as an excuse to behead me.</i>


    Carynne swallowed hard, looking at Ise��s excited face. It seems they really <i>must</i> be friends now��there was no other choice. Otherwise, Verdic might kill her.


    ��Firstly, let��s head to the Grand Cathedral in the capital first. I n to request protection there.��


    ��Protection?��


    ��Yes. All churches have the duty to protect the sanctity of marriage. I��m nning to say I��ve run away from an unwanted marriage.��


    Ise��s destination waspletely unexpected to Carynne. While it��s true that all churches had the duty to protect people, most women seeking refuge from their own fathers or brothers went to secluded monasteries deep in the mountains��not the grand cathedral that��s smack in the middle of the capital.That ce was more a seat of power than religion. Arriving there would immediately alert Verdic.


    ��Must the destination be the Grand Cathedral? Wouldn��t it be harder for Mister Verdic to find us if we went to a secluded monastery? What about going somewhere far away?��


    Apletely new ce would be a fresh adventure for Carynne.


    A new ce, perhaps an endless sea or surrounded by dense forest. Carynne wanted to run away as far as possible.


    However, Ise shook her head.


    ��Carynne, I��m not simply running away to hide from my father. The Grand Cathedral should ensure my father can��t forcibly take me back. Plus, what��s there to do in a secluded ce? I want to have fun in the capital.��


    Ah, to have fun.


    ��I see. You��re�� thoroughly prepared.��


    ��At the very least, it should take a year before I get sent back.��


    <i>And I just hope my head remains attached until that day��that I won��t die before then.</i>


    But no matter what Carynne felt, all Ise felt was pure excitement.


    iming she was nothing but a puppet of her father, Ise expressed her ambition to see the world without him.


    Listening to her, Carynne felt an itch in her throat.


    Raymond��s rejection seemed to have had a significant impact on the girl.


    * * *


    After riding for a while, night fell.


    Zion, rmended by Raymond, handled the carriage roughly. The carriage, obtained secretly, was small and ufortable.


    Carynne and Ise felt like dough, exhausted and battered.


    ��I feel like I��m going to die����


    Fortunately, the carriage stopped. Sir Zion announced from outside.


    ��It would be best to stay here for the night.��


    ��This ce����


    Carynne looked outside and grimaced.


    This ce was no good.


    This tower again. The one where she died.


    What day was it today? This tower was dangerous.


    Carynne recalled the day she had met Raymond in the past��they had encountered Duke Luthe��s men here.


    She felt that staying the night in this tower was a bad omen.


    ��We should stay the night here before heading up.��


    ��No, let��s go.��


    Carynne tried to remember if today was the same date as that time but couldn��t recall.


    Her past lives were too jumbled, and she had only encountered Duke Luthe once. Was today that day? It seemed too early yet. Carynne clenched her fists with tension.


    Raymond wasn��t with them now.


    They needed to go far, far away from this tower.


    ��Wouldn��t it be better to arrive in the capital as soon as possible? Ise, that would be better.��


    ��I want to rest. My back hurts.��


    Ise spoke with a sullen face. Riding in the small, ufortable carriage that was driven roughly had evidently worn her out.


    However, Carynne felt uneasy about staying in this tower.


    ��What if we get caught by Mister Verdic before we even reach the capital because we stayed here? Sir, wouldn��t it be better to just keep going?��


    ��No, it��s impossible. The night forest is more dangerous, and the horses are too exhausted to move any further after running all day. We might all die if we encounter a bear in the forest.��


    ��Yeah, Carynne, he��s right. Continuing on would be too risky.��


    Carynne bit her lip in anxiety. But Zion made sense. Her opposition to this ce was due to her memories from a past life.


    Generally, if the timing and ce match up, life flows simrly to the previous ones. How could she exin this to them?


    ��I actually have prophetic dreams.��


    ��Let��s depart early tomorrow morning, shall we?��


    ��������


    No one��s listening.


    Carynne red at Sir Zion, appointed by Raymond, but he pretended not to notice.


    He was an incredibly slippery man. And regardless of what Carynne said, Ise seemed thrilled at the idea of stopping to rest, so there was nothing to be done.


    ��It��s been a while since I��ve been to this tower! I asionallye around this area for summer hunting, but we rarely use the tower.��


    ��Wouldn��t it be better to rest below rather than going up?��


    ��It��s more dangerous in the carriage, so let��s just go up.��


    ����Alright.��


    Since no one listened to her anyway, Carynne reluctantly agreed.


    Carynne found herself missing Raymond all the more. Without anyone to listen to her, she felt somewhat deted. Where could Raymond be at this moment? Although they had agreed to deal with their respective matters and meet again in the capital, Carynne already felt the absence of his presence. But she couldn��t follow him.


    Carynne, adjusting her throat, followed Ise up the tower.


    ��Why are you following us?��


    Ise stopped midway up the stairs and looked back at Sir Zion, who was following them.


    Pointing at himself, Zion asked,


    ��Me?��


    ��Yes, there��s only one room up there. You stay downstairs.��


    ��You want me to sleep alone in the carriage?��


    The coachman, pointing at himself incredulously, looked up at Ise as if the idea was absurd. Ise nodded and pointed at him,


    ��Isn��t that obvious? Carynne, you agree, right? How can a coachman anddies sleep in the same space?��


    ��Of course.��


    Carynne smiled faintly as she looked down at Zion, the coachman. She had decided to always take Ise��s side. Satisfied with Carynne��s answer, Ise didn��t bother to listen to the coachman��s response and went up.


    ��You��re telling me to fend for myself?��


    Carynne approached the coachman and whispered quietly,


    ��Isn��t that why you were rmended by Sir Raymond?��


    ��������


    The man scratched the back of his head, grimaced, and went down.


    Carynne didn��t like the man��s disrespectful attitude, but considering Raymond��s rmendation, she resolved to try to get along with him.


    * * *


    Ise quickly fell asleep, snoring softly, but Carynne couldn��t sleep at all. She was worried about what had happened in this tower before.


    Getting up, she looked out the window to check on the carriage, then sat back down to gaze at Ise.


    Seeing Ise sleep so soundly reminded her of a day from the past.


    ����Ha.��


    What would happen now? Carynne felt a sense of d��j�� vu from Ise��s sleeping form.


    She had been Ise��s maid and nurse. Although she had decided to be friends this time, it wasn��t because Carynne felt any particr fondness for Ise.


    Carynne already felt weary. Approaches with intent are exhausting. The thought that Ise��s whimsical actions might lead her to death again drained her even more.


    ����Ise.��


    ��������


    So deeply asleep as she was, Ise didn��t wake up even when called.


    The sense of d��j�� vu led Carynne to a strong temptation she had feltst time��when she had looked at Ise��s neck while the girl was in aa.


    From that time��that life��when she tried to kill the girl, only for Ise to strike back.


    That time was so incredibly fun that it was difficult to put into words.


    And ultimately, hadn��t Carynne failed to kill Ise then? What would happen if she killed her this time?

 Chapter 221

    Chapter 221


    Clearly, there was a much simpler method avable to Carynne than bing friends with Ise. Surely, an unprecedented event might strike again. The changes that started with Nancy��s death that year were immense.


    Ise was the most notable person in Carynne��s life. No doubt, things would change dramatically.


    And it would really be interesting.


    ��������


    Carynne quietly pulled up the nket to cover Ise��s neck. She could feel Ise��s warmth beneath her hand. Carynne nced down at her fingers, staring intently.


    But in the end, she quietly exhaled and turned away from Ise after tucking her in. She needed to try and sleep, too.


    ����Everything��s alright.��


    Carynne decided to choose the joy of bing friends over the joy of killing. There were things more important than satisfying her petty curiosity.


    It wasn��t because she was suddenly feelingpassion for Ise.It was because she loves Raymond.


    And for his sake, she could even be a saint.


    Just as much as he could be the devil.


    * * *


    ��Wake up.��


    <i>Oh, please.</i>


    Carynne squinted her eyes shut again and pulled up the nket. She hadn��tined of being tired like Ise, but Carynne was exhausted all the same.


    And since she could guess who was shaking her so roughly, Carynne wanted to cry even more.


    Had the coachman rmended by Raymond already died? Should she have brought Raymond along? If he were here, he would take her away likest time. To kill all these people waking her from her sleep.


    No. Hadn��t she decided against that? Carynne opened her eyes.


    The people she was already expecting had surrounded her.


    She had hoped the dates wouldn��t match, but as always, anything that can go wrong, <i>will</i> go wrong.


    ����Who are you?��


    Although she asked, she already knew who these people were.


    Duke Luthe and his group.


    ��Get up right now.��


    ����Who are you?��


    Suppressing the desire to cry, Carynne repeated the question she had asked before.


    This time, there were more than just one or two people. An old man and a child. The ent from beyond the White Mountain Range. Definitely people from the Luthe Duchy.


    ��Who are you, and what��s your rtionship with Verdic Evans? Answer.��


    A man roughly pulled Carynne to her feet.


    Carynne looked around. Ise wasn��t in bed.


    <i>Could it be.</i>


    Carynne clenched her teeth.


    Was Ise already dead? Last time, Nancy was killed on the spot. Had Ise taken on that role?


    ��State your name.��


    ����My name is Carynne Hare, daughter of Catherine Nora Hare. My mother��s maiden name was Enide.��


    ��The granddaughter of Countess Enide.��


    ��Ah, the great-granddaughter of Grand Duchess Ca.��


    The old man leaning on a cane stepped forward again.


    ��Why are you here?��


    Repeating questions, repeating scenarios. But this time, Raymond wasn��t there. She had agreed to meet Raymondter because he needed to stay out of Ise��s sight. At his pace, he should be at his mansion now��far, far away from here.


    ��I was on my way to the capital.��


    After answering, Carynne closed her mouth. There��s no need to ask who these people are or reveal their identities.


    Keep quiet and end it as quietly as possible. Hopefully, they would just pass by.


    But Duke Luthe didn��t act as she had hoped.


    ��Aren��t you going to ask who we are?��


    ��������


    ��Wise.��


    ��We must kill her. It��s not good for anyone who has seen us to remain alive.��


    Damn, the conversation was flowing at a faster pace than expected. Carynne was already in an irreversible situation. She shouldn��t have stayed in this tower. No, she shouldn��t have even passed through this forest. Even if it took longer, she should have found another way. Or was the root of the problem visiting Ise��s house?


    Carynne tried to trace back where her choices went wrong.


    ��Is that really necessary?��


    ��There are rumors that this girl is the bastard of Crown Prince Gueuze. Information might leak.��


    How could those ridiculous rumors be erased? Carynne red at the man spouting the same tiresome rumors she wished she could forget.


    This time too, it seemed people had no intention of letting Carynne live. Where was Ise? Carynne pondered over what part she had failed in this life.


    The path to bing friends with Ise was too treacherous.


    ��It seems we have no choice.��


    The old man approached Carynne. As expected, Carynne was to die this time. Without Raymond, would it end quickly?


    <i>��Kyaaaaah!��</i>


    ��Better not move any further, or things won��t end well.��


    ��D-Don��t!��


    But at that moment, the situation reversed.


    One second and the old man was rushing towards Carynne, but the next, he abruptly turned towards the window when someone shouted.


    There stood the old man��s granddaughter and Zion.


    More precisely, Zion was the only one standing.


    The girl��s body was dangling outside the window.


    ��Who are you!��


    ��Grand�� Grandfather��! Please save me!��


    ��Oh, didn��t I say you shouldn��te any closer? If you move even a step forward, I might get too scared and lose my grip.��


    The coachman rmended by Raymond was holding the girl��s arm with one hand and swinging her outside the window.


    Did he sneak in while people��s attention was on Carynne? The man looked around at the people, smiling broadly.


    ��Let that child go!��


    ��You first. Let go of thatdy over there.��


    They hurriedly released Carynne.


    ��Fine! Done! Now bring that child here�� inside����


    ��Put down your guns, too.��


    ��How can we trust you!��


    ��Then don��t.��


    And he let go.


    ��A-Aaaah!��


    ��No!��


    But she didn��t fall. The man let go and then quickly grabbed the girl��s neck from behind. The girl��s face was contorted with fear.


    ��If you think I��m joking, keep doing that. Now, put everything down and leave naked through the forest. Otherwise, I really will let go. Well, the girl might live if she��s lucky. But expect her to be crippled.��


    ��Do you think you��ll be safe after this?��


    ��Would I be in less danger if I don��t do this?��


    Licking his lips, he clearly enjoyed the situation. Carynne felt the atmosphere growing more hostile. This wasn��t good. These people were ready to face death.


    ��If you don��t back off, this kid��s head might just burst, you know?��


    ��������


    <i>Stop.</i>


    The coachman��s provocation was too much. The people began exchanging nces, stepping out of panic. No matter how the coachman threatened them with the child, he was just one man against four men with guns. The oue was obvious. The situation was not good. But what could Carynne do to defuse it now?


    ��������


    Their eyes met. Carynne clenched her fist, looking at the coachman. Was he signaling her to escape alone while he distracted them? Carynne started to back away slowly.


    While the man bought time, she needed to hide. That was the best option for now. Slowly. Quietly.


    ����Oh my? Who are you people?��


    But the voice from right behind her signaled the end for Carynne.


    ��Huh? Carynne?��


    Ise was standing there, eyes wide open. She must have fallen off the bed, and that��s why hadn��t been visible before.

 Chapter 222

    Chapter 222


    Silence thickly nketed the group, and it shattered in an instant.


    Carynne urgently called out to Ise.


    ��Ise Evans.��


    ��Now, what�� <i>uh, umph!��</i>


    ��Shh, Ise. Don��t make any sudden movements.��


    Carynne quickly covered Ise��s mouth as she attempted to scream. The sudden appearance of ��Ise�� was unexpected for Duke Luthe��s group as well, preventing immediate disaster.


    Carynne covered Ise��s mouth and quickly exined.


    ��Ise, these people are trying to kill us because they found us while they were fleeing. And Sir Zion is confronting them to protect us.��


    Carynne swallowed hard as she watched Zion, who was ready to throw the duke��s granddaughter out of the window.��That��s too harsh a method.��


    While Zion��s skills weren��t quite up to par with Raymond��s, they were sufficiently good. Using a young child as a hostage for negotiation was extreme but it wasn��t the wrong move.


    The problem was how desperate Duke Luthe was.


    Carynne continued speaking to Ise after seeing a young man next to the duke fiddling with a gun.


    ��Got it? If you promise not to move unexpectedly, I��ll let you go.��


    <i>����Mmph.��</i>


    ��Okay?��


    Ise quietly nodded. Carynne slowly removed her hand from Ise��s mouth.


    ��Is the coachman a knight? You didn��t say that.��


    ��Is that important right now����


    ��How do you know him?��


    ������.��


    Carynne considered covering Ise��s mouth again.


    ��Ise Evans, right now, that��s not����


    Carynne then realized.


    ��No, I get it. It <i>is</i> important.��


    Precisely, other things weren��t as important to Ise.


    ��I asked my father to send him here. But I was told he��s not a very reputable man����


    ��The knight�� Is he single?��


    ��Yes.��


    The men looked at Ise disdainfully. Zion, too, from the window, listened to the young women��s conversation with a look of disbelief.


    ��Lady Carynne, you should keep your wits about you. And what did you just say about my reputation?��


    ��Sir Zion, please put the child down.��


    ��What?��


    ��There��s no need to go that far.��


    For the first time in a long while, Carynne��s memories from her past life were useful. She smiled and pointed at Ise while speaking to Duke Luthe.


    ��Do you know who thisdy is, Duke Luthe?��


    ��So you knew who I was all this time.��


    ��Yes. I know that you are Duke Luthe. But that��s not important right now.��


    In her previous life, Duke Luthe had revealed his name before attempting to kill Carynne.


    Carynne looked back and forth between the duke and Zion. If she had been alone here, if instead of Zion it had been Raymond here, the situation would have been the same asst time.


    Raymond would have killed everyone and left, but Zion didn��t have that level of skill.


    And there was another difference.


    Ise was here this time.


    ��This is Ise Evans, the only daughter of Verdic Evans.��


    The young man stepped forward to scrutinize Ise��s face, but even he seemed unsure. He asked Carynne.


    ��Can you prove it?��


    ��That��s for you to figure out. But if you touch thisdy, it��s over for you. She��s Verdic��s one and only daughter.��


    Carynne replied, staring intently at him.


    Ise Evans was here. Duke Luthe needed Verdic��s help.


    The duke groaned. They were in the midst of fleeing. They were supposed to meet someone sent by Verdic at this tower and then be guided to a hiding ce, but they encountered unexpected people.


    They couldn��t just pass by.


    But the duke��s silence was short-lived because Ise began speaking to him.


    ��I have my father��s seal. Wouldn��t that be sufficient?��


    ��You��re truly Verdic��s daughter?��


    ��Yes. I was on my way to the capital. Just let us go as we are and take my seal and letter to my father. Wouldn��t that settle everything?��


    ��Indeed, as you say.��


    When did she even prepare that?


    Carynne found herself almost admiring Ise, thoroughly prepared for her departure, or rather, her escape.


    Despite some disturbances, Duke Luthe and Ise reached an agreement.


    * * *


    ��Please deliver this to my father.��


    ��I understand. Do you have any other messages?��


    Ise spoke firmly.


    ��Tell him not to look for me until I return by myself. If he tries to take me back by force����


    Ise drew a line across her throat with her finger.


    ��It will only lead to death.��


    ��That��s not something a child should say to their parents. But, understood.��


    Ise handed Duke Luthe a letter she had written. The duke took it, carefully tucked it into his coat, and then took his granddaughter��s hand.


    ��May your journey be peaceful, Miss Ise Evans�� and you as well Miss Carynne Hare.��


    ��Thank you.��


    ��Let��s go, child.��


    <i>Thud.</i>


    ����You��re incredible, Miss Ise.��


    Carynne muttered, looking down at Ise next to her. Ise nced at Carynne and snorted.


    ��I had heard about it from my father, but I didn��t expect to encounter them here. Really, making a fuss over nothing.��


    It was truly astonishing.


    The situation was resolved astonishingly quickly. When the coachman threatened the duke with his granddaughter��s life, Carynne thought it was the end. However, once Ise revealed she was Verdic��s daughter, the situation turned around.


    Being famous due to her mother��s infamous association with the crown prince only added risks for Carynne. It was a stark contrast to Ise, who seemed quite pleased with her situation.


    ��Being from a famous family doesn��t help much, does it, Carynne?��


    ��You��re truly amazing, Miss Ise.��


    ��You��ve seen enough.��


    ��You really are incredible, Miss Ise.��


    ��������


    ��Really.��


    Carynne responded with a bright smile to Ise, who gave her a vague look. Then, she turned to re at Zion with displeasure.


    ��What are you ring at me for?��


    ��Because of you, we were almost in greater danger. Can��t you do your job properly? It was only because Miss Ise was here that we managed to live.��


    ��Had I not been here, both of you might have been dead while sleeping.��


    ��Enough talking!��


    ��It��s alright, Carynne. He��s right.��


    ����What?��


    ��I won��tin anymore. Let��s head to the capital now.��


    Carynne shook her head, wondering if she had misheard Ise. But Ise seriously answered and began to gather her clothes to get up.


    Did the sorrow of heartbreak truly change Ise?


    Carynne pondered, ncing at Zion, who merely shrugged his shoulders. In the end, he didn��t know Ise, so he didn��t know.


    Carynne felt suffocated by not having anyone to share how much Ise had changed.


    This was a big deal.


    Ise taking the initiative in resolving the situation and not throwing tantrums was unprecedented.


    Carynne took a deep breath and grabbed her flowing red hair, which was fluttering through therge open window.


    Ise��s golden locks seemed to sparkle more than ever in the morning sun.


    * * *


    It��s spring.


    Even without a gardener��s care, flowers have bloomed. The roadside was full of flowers.


    The weather was pleasant, and the scenery was beautiful.


    The journey to the capital felt both short and long.


    Due to the nice weather, the three of them were not inside the carriage but sitting side by side on the coachman��s seat, looking at the scenery and chatting.


    ��My goodness, that��s a story I��ve never heard before. Sir Zion, you really have a lot of experience.��


    ��Not at all. Stories from within the army don��t usually get out. Miss Ise, do you know?��


    ��Tell me, tell me.��


    ��������


    Strictly speaking, only two of them were exchanging stories.


    For the first time in her life, Carynne felt quite out of ce.

 Chapter 223

    Chapter 223


    ��Sir Zion, how much longer until we arrive?��


    Carynne had only been listening to the conversation between the two until now, but she finally spoke to Sir Zion.


    ��So that��s what Sir Raymond said.��


    ��Really? Did he say that?��


    ��������


    But it seemed Zion hadn��t heard Carynne at all.


    She thought about asking again but decided against it. She felt like a borrowed sack of barley, a feeling she rarely experienced even though she had lived for so long.


    Meanwhile, Ise and Zion were enthusiastically blooming in a conversation about various topics, but mostly revolving around disparaging remarks about Raymond.


    ��So when Sir Raymond did that, it was so funny you wouldn��t believe it. He isn��t all that great, you know.��<i>��Hmph,</i> I wish I had seen that.��


    ��Um, Miss Ise, are you alright with me talking about Sir Raymond like this?��


    Zion already knew that Raymond and Ise had broken off their engagement. Yet, he asked her about it like this anyway.


    After finding out that he was a knight, Ise had started showing interest in him. And since then, Zion hadn��t missed the chance to switch it up��the callousness of an insolent coachman had thus transformed into the splendor of a chivalrous knight.


    Carynne could only be amazed by his quick change of attitude. She stared at Zion with a hint of incredulity, but he just winked at her and continued talking ill of Raymond.


    ��I understand you were engaged to Sir Raymond�� I hope I��m not making a mistake here.��


    ����What nonsense.��


    Good heavens.


    Carynne had to pretend she wasn��t listening to the exchange between Ise and Zion. She couldn��t join in nor could she escape somewhere else while sitting in the carriage. Regardless of Carynne��s difort, Ise and Zion continued their conversation.


    ��What? Your engagement with Sir Raymond had been broken off?��


    ��That��s what happened. I would prefer it if you no longer speak of him in front of me.��


    Ise snorted disdainfully as she responded to Zion��s inquiry about Raymond. Zion looked at her seriously.


    ��But Sir Raymondcks discernment to hurl such abuse at someone like Miss Ise Evans.��


    ��I utterly despise such hypocrites.��


    Ise turned her head sharply and snapped back. Zionughed and said,


    ��Sometimes Sir Raymond seems that way. Ady with the honesty and great spirit like you, Miss Ise, wouldn��t suit him.��


    ��How do you know that about me?��


    ��A lot of people are curious about Mister Verdic��s daughter.��


    ��What do they say?��


    Ise asked with a tense voice.


    Carynne thought about the reputation that floated around Ise in high society. Naturally, the stories weren��t good.


    Verdic��s money-grubbing daughter. Rude,cking manners, and a woman who buys men with money.


    It was so publicly known that Ise herself couldn��t possibly have stayed unaware, and Carynne had to endure her hysterical outbursts.


    ��No rumor lives up to the real thing.��


    Zion chuckled as he responded.


    ��Are you talking about my face?��


    ��Everything about you.��


    <i>Good grief.</i>


    Carynne narrowed her eyes and red at Zion. Sir Zion, introduced by Raymond, certainly had nock in his security skills. But for him to flirt so openly with Ise��


    Carynne frowned as she looked at Ise.


    <i>��Hmph! </i>Everyone just starts spreading rumors after borrowing money from my father.��


    ��That seems likely.��


    <i>But this guy seems like he��s after your money, too.</i>


    Carynne was about to whisper that. As a friend, she ought to advise on whether the men approaching were good or bad.


    Carynne thought of the noblemen in high society who, though not as reputable as Raymond, were not rude <i>and</i> possessed considerable wealth.


    ��������


    The problem was that the men were all only interested in Carynne. Even if she tried to introduce Ise, it was uncertain whether they would like each other. Moreover, while talking to Zion, Ise looked like she was genuinely quite chipper.


    ��Should I just leave things as they are?��


    Carynne noticed Ise ncing at her while her voice grew louder. Ise seemed quite pleased that Zion was showing more interest in her than in Carynne. It felt a bit strange, but perhaps it was okay as long as Ise was satisfied. Ise was pleased with Zion, and Carynne would just be pping along at Ise��s side.


    ����Sir Zion, when are you meant to receive the promisedpensation?��


    ��You needn��t worry about that, Miss Carynne.��


    His deliberate distancing was too obvious. Carynne frowned. Was it really right to leave it at that?


    Zion ignored Carynne and asked Ise.


    ��Ise, will you continue to stay at the Grand Cathedral after we reach the capital? Isn��t that a bit dull?��


    ��I suppose so. My father won��t be able to enter anyway.��


    ��Ah, but I know some great ces, and it would be a shame to just stay there.��


    ��But if my fatheres looking����


    It was already clear from Ise��s face that she was thinking of changing her ns of staying indefinitely at the temple, and the following to-do list she had written before meeting Zion. At this, Carynne stopped herself from saying anything. Ise pretending to be a well-mannereddy didn��t suit her.


    Why did Raymond introduce such a man? Clearly, he was skilled, but Zion��s overt flirting with Ise was concerning.


    Ise was the priority.


    Carynne thought again about her goal in this life.


    <i>To be friends with Ise.</i>


    And as a friend, it was her duty to remove any unworthy men who clung to her. Carynne believed that. And as she red at the back of Zion��s head, she pondered how to separate the two.


    There are many men in the world. And Carynne knew plenty of men herself.


    Carynne clenched her fist and resolved to introduce other men to her friend.


    * * *


    ��Then, I��ll entrust this task to you, Sir Zion.��


    Raymond had to swallow his groan as he looked at the man before him. The guy��s smile was bright. He seemed quite pleased with thepensation Raymond had promised. After all, most of the tasks he took on were more dangerous than Raymond��s.


    With a background of being from the lowliest among themoners, Zion was always tasked with dirty work or fighting on the front lines. For him, this was no more than a light exercise he did every day.


    ��Just trust me, senior. Carrying twodies to the capital is no sweat at all.��


    ����I��m seriously relying on you this time, Sir Zion. I have things to do and can��t apany them�� but really, it should have been me going.��


    ��Just trust me.��


    Zion thumped his chest confidently in response, but Raymond was not reassured.


    ��I can��t just send the two of them alone.��


    It was impossible for Carynne and Ise to travel to the capital alone. They needed a carriage and someone to protect them.


    ����Sir Zion, I have a favor to ask.��


    Sir Zion Electra, while not as skilled as Raymond, was certainly capable and was one of the people closest to him that could be motivated by money. Others had power so that Raymond couldn��t move them, or it risked Ise or Verdic finding out about the n.


    Zion was the right choice. However, the problem was that Zion was a bit too good at wooing women. Raymond knew how much of a ��darling�� he was to many women, which was why he really didn��t feel like introducing him to Carynne.


    ��Well, so many people already say that I do anything for money. Do I look like someone who would touch your woman, senior?��


    ����I��ve broken off my engagement with Ise Evans.��


    ��What? Why? That cash cow�� <i>Ahem.</i> But wow, you��re really crazy, senior.��


    ��That��s why I want to help her achieve what she wants to do from now on. So, if you do anything strange to her, I won��t let it go.��


    ��What about the other woman? There��s one more, right?��


    ��Yes, it��s Miss Carynne Hare����


    <i>And actually, she��s my lover, and she and my ex-fianc��e are supposed to be friends.</i>


    It seemed excessively strange even to himself. How should he exin their situation to Zion?

 Chapter 224

    Chapter 224


    In the end, Raymond could not bring himself to say those words and could only continuously ask for the same favor while patting Zion��s shoulder.


    ��Anyway, I entrust their safety to you, from you too.��


    Zion responded to Raymond, who kept making anxious expressions.


    ��Don��t worry too much, Sir Raymond. I assure you, I won��t cause any trouble.��


    ��You��d make a move on even ny-year-old grandmothers as long as they��re wearing skirts, wouldn��t you?��


    The problem was Zion��s notoriously messy rtionships with women. Zion had no backing. Even though they seemed simr in situation, Zion��s status was worlds apart from Raymond because he was a noble. That��s why Zion wanted to be protected, wrapped in the skirts of various noblewomen.


    Raymond was worried about Carynne and Ise. He had never seen Zion involved with them over the many years he had lived through, so he couldn��t be sure of their safety.


    Seeing Raymond��s serious expression, Zion pouted unhappily and said,


    ��Are you not seeing me in a strange light?����Wasn��t yourst lover Countess Elizabeth? A noblewoman in her eighties?��


    ��She was a truly beautiful person. If only her darling children hadn��t switched the will at the end, by now I����


    Zion gritted his teeth as he reminisced about his deceased former lover.


    ��And before her, Baroness She was ny.��


    ��She was eighty-seven. Do not casually judge ady��s age, Sir Raymond.��


    ��I also know that you dated both at the same time.��


    ��There were three of them. Do not casually judge the number of a man��s lovers, Sir Raymond.��


    ��������


    Raymond felt sick thinking of the many noblewomen Zion had been involved with.


    Raymond was certain of Carynne��s love for him, but he was not happy about the famously charming socialite Zion being by her side. Zion was like a walking time bomb.


    There were youngerdies as well as older ones. Zion did not discriminate when it came to women.


    But now, Zion was the only person Raymond could entrust them to, as he also had his own tasks to handle. Raymond thought of his older brother, who was likely abusing the servants in his house at that moment.


    Since Carynne had chosen the path of love and forgiveness, shouldn��t he also try? Resigned, Raymond shook hands with Zion Electra and made a vow.


    ����I��ll trust you.��


    ��Yes, please trust me. There��s no need to worry. And one more thing,��


    Zion flicked his finger as he spoke to Raymond.


    ��I don��t deal with women without money. Thinking I��d go for a country lord��s daughter��you��re underestimating my taste. I don��t just look at age, alright? My standards are high.��


    Zion grumbled as if his pride were hurt.


    ��I only love women who have lots of money.��


    ��That��s the problem.��


    Raymond sighed, and Zion lightly punched his shoulder with a smile.


    ��Don��t take my love lightly, Sir Raymond. I��m always serious in the face of money, and my love is pure too.��


    * * *


    Carynne looked up at the Grand Cathedral.


    They had finally arrived.


    * * *


    After Ise had spent a long time arguing with the officiating priest in his room, she came out with a relieved expression. Carynne knew she had seeded.


    <i>��Huu,</i> that old man made such a fuss even though it��s clear he wouldn��t refuse.��


    ��I-I-Ise�� they��ll hear.��


    ��Ah.��


    Ise covered her mouth, but it was already toote.


    <i>��Ahem, ahem.��</i>


    The priest red at Ise from the slightly opened door, but that was the end of it. As Ise firmly closed the door, she said to Carynne,


    ��Well, anyway, it��s settled. I��ll be staying here for a while. I��d appreciate it if you could help me while I��m here. In the meantime, I��ll write to my father to ask him to halt our business��I��ll tell him I��m more interested in other ces than the Hare domain. This settles it, right?��


    ��Yes����


    In fact, Carynne had set her eyes on bing friends with Ise as a bigger goal than saving her family��snds. Carynne tried to continue the conversation with Ise by expressing her gratitude, but Ise turned and started walking away.


    Despite it being night, the faint sound of hymns being practiced could be heard in the corridor. Ise continued to exin what��s to be done from now on as she dragged her bag along.


    Since Zion, who wasn��t officially staying, couldn��te in at night, Ise had to carry her bag herself. In the past, she would have naturally thrown it to Carynne, but now the situation was different.


    ��I��ve paid enough money, so it��s okay to stay here for more than a year. Food included.��


    ��One year?��


    ��I don��t want to stay that long, but you know.��


    <i>It isn��t likely that they��d refund it, huh?</i>


    Carynne became really curious about how much had been paid as she could sense a hint of regret in Ise��s voice.


    ��She must have paid a ton.��


    Temples do take in fugitives and travelers, but they usually demand some amount of money in return. Otherwise, all temples would swarm with homeless people trying to use them as shelters.


    At arge establishment like the Grand Cathedral, money was always wee. Carynne couldn��t know exactly how much Ise had given, but she guessed it must have been at least a lump of gold.


    ��Maybe she gave even more?��


    Carynne followed Ise through the corridor to a separate building where their amodations were. It was time to sleep again. Ise handed Carynne arge key.


    ��I��ve donated enough, so we can have separate rooms. It��s better for you to have your own room too, right?��


    ��Is my room next to yours?��


    ��Are you dissatisfied?��


    Carynne quickly added, seeing Ise starting to frown.


    ��No, not at all. Why would I be? I��m very happy about it! Really! Have a good night, Miss Ise.��


    * * *


    Carynne unpacked her belongings.


    The room wasn��t veryrge, but it was tidy. A bed, a desk, a wardrobe. The only difference from an ordinary room was that this one contained sacred objects and scriptures.


    ��Maybe I should study theology in this life.��


    She had thought about that in the past.


    It��s worth considering positively.


    ����It��s cold.��


    However, due to the chill climbing the stone walls, Carynne couldn��t undress and had to wrap herself in more nkets instead. Her positive thoughts quickly vanished.


    Carynne felt a sense of d��j�� vu.


    ����This reminds me of when I was a maid before.��


    But that shouldn��t have been the case. This wasn��t Ise��s mansion��it��s a cathedral. And this time, she was clearly not a maid but an ally apanying Ise. Surely she would be friends with her this time. And so far, it wasn��t too bad.


    Besides, Ise had broken ties with Raymond and had left home. And they had ovee hardships together.


    She could surely be Ise��s friend. She wouldn��t be treated like a maid.


    Maybe their life together would be like that of students at a girls�� school. Girls�� schools were usually attended by middle-ss women who wished to pursue a career.


    Women from families like Carynne��s or with assets like Ise��s usually hired private tutors at home. Still, Carynne sometimes wondered what it would be like to live independently at a girls�� school, away from home for years, living only with peers.


    ��But the temple will be different from Evans�� mansion, right? It might even be simr to a school.��


    Even though the Grand Cathedral charged money, it was bound to differ in nature from ordinary amodations. Visitors were expected to live as devotees to some extent. This included attending mass twice a day, being satisfied with provided meals, and doing various odd jobs at the temple under the guise of volunteering.


    This time, Carynne wouldn��t just be serving Ise unterally. They could spend time together and establish a rtionship where they��re on equal standing.

 Chapter 225

    Chapter 225


    <em>Ding�� Ding��</em>


    The sound of the bell signaling midnight echoed.


    Carynne rolled her eyes and tried to fall asleep.


    How should she get along with Ise? She still couldn��t tell. But living together might make it easier to be closer. Hadn��t Raymond said the same?


    ��How exactly do people make friends?��


    ��Just�� by being together, you be friends.��


    ��Ah, really. Try to exin it with a bit more sincerity.��


    A life without friends throughout a hundred years of solitude.


    Carynne had earnestly asked Raymond how to make friends while holding her fountain pen, ready to take notes. However, Raymond struggled to exin it to her.


    He had always been popr, with both men and women. But fitting in wasn��t something you could calcte and encapste with words. People usually approached him first, not the other way around. So, he didn��t know what to say to Carynne when she asked how to make friends.


    ����Compared to the time I��ve spent with Ise, haven��t I been with you longer��?��


    Raymond groaned and rubbed his temples.


    ��It��s just that I lived with a group. When you live together, you naturally grow closer.��


    Raymond grabbed Carynne��s shoulder and reassured her again.


    ��Surely, if you live together, anyone woulde to like you.��


    * * *


    With what confidence was he basing that on?


    Carynne avoided the stern gaze of the vicar. His eyes were not kind. But it wasn��t really directed at Carynne herself. She at least was attending morning mass.


    ��Did Miss Ise Evans note today either?��


    Because Ise had no intention of participating in any of the cathedral��s activities.


    Ise had note today either. Days had passed quickly, but Ise had not once lived the life of a regr parishioner.


    Then the scrutiny should be on Ise, but since she didn��te out at all, Carynne had to keep making excuses for her every time. Today, Carynne concocted yet another excuse for Ise.


    ����She��s not feeling well.��


    ��Is that true?��


    No, it wasn��t. Ise was probably sleeping right now. She had gotten thoroughly drunk after meeting opera singers the night before. Zion had practically carried a heavy Ise to the front of the Grand Cathedral, but Carynne had to support her to her room.


    ��Miss Carynne. Is Miss Ise really that ill? Shouldn��t she see a doctor then?��


    ��It��s not that serious����


    ��Miss Hare.��


    Seeing the persistence of his questioning, it seemed he had caught theming in yesterday. The vicar��s gray eyes gleamed beneath his brows. Lying further seemed pointless. It would only fuel the fire.


    ��That��s what she told me to say.��


    ��������


    Of course, Ise hadn��t said that. Ise used the Grand Cathedral as lodging, but she didn��t attend mass. She also consistently broke curfew.


    Some priests gave her disapproving looks, but she ignored them. The heap of gold Ise had given to the bishop when she entered the cathedral was too significant to ignore, and they were mindful of her father, Verdic Evans. If they ousted her over her lifestyle and something happened, Verdic would surely wreak havoc on the clergy.


    ��Miss Carynne Hare.��


    ��Yes, Vicar Ciaron.��


    ��Just�� let Miss Ise Evans live as she wishes. I won��t encourage her toe to mass anymore.��


    The vicar, looking tired, entrusted this task to Carynne. He had several times chastised Ise��s indulgent andzy lifestyle like an old clergyman should, but Ise, with the defiance of youth, ignored him. In the end, the vicar was the one who lost.


    Here too, Ise could live as she wanted. And that direction was far frommunal living.


    Carynne was well-seasoned in ying the role of a maid by Ise��s side during the day, to the point that she was sick and tired of it. She knew which clothes Ise liked, which ys she enjoyed, in front of whom she made mistakes, whom she offended, and what kind of antics she was up to.


    It would be rare to find someone who knew Ise over the past year better than Carynne did. Not even her parents could know her that intricately.


    So, Carynne had some expectations about this situation.


    ��Ise, this dress suits you the best. It��s the finest here.��


    <em>Probably.</em>


    Carynne and Ise were in the midst of a lengthy argument while trying on various dresses in Madame Devinel��s boutique. Madame Devinel��s shop was one of the finer ones in the capital, and it was a ce where Ise had greatly admired the designs Carynne had chosen in the past.


    ��But I hate this dress.��


    ��Doesn��t it suit you? This dress would be the most fitting for your attendance at Countess Luce��s gathering. It��s an auction, but the Golden Lion Hall is so crowded that you need something this shy.��


    Carynne tried to cate a grumbling Ise while gluing some ornaments to her face. The mboyant corsage and the simrly designed skirt decorations were striking.


    ��It��s too heavy.��


    ��You used to like this kind of thing, so what��s wrong now?��


    ��I never really liked these.��


    ��������


    ��I really like this dress.��


    In the past, Ise would wear that peach-colored dress and twirl around the room in front of Carynne, showing off. Carynne had to p her hands in admiration dozens of times or else face Ise��s wrath, her cheeks flushing as she sped her hands in envy.


    ��It really suits you.��


    ��No touching. You couldn��t afford this dress no matter how long you worked.��


    ��The dress looks too tacky!��


    ��H-H-How can you say that about my design��!��


    ��Shouldn��t you give me a properly made dress? Bring something with smaller, more delicate decorations! And I don��t like the color either. It would be better if a different fabric were used around the neck.��


    ��Miss Ise Evans. For consistency, it would be better to use this fabric����


    ��Are you just beingzy now!��


    She was just throwing a tantrum.


    Where did thise from? Carynne turned her head and sighed softly, then caught the eye of otherdies in the dressing room.


    <em>��It��s tough, isn��t it?��</em>


    <em>��I��m alright.��</em>


    They briefly exchanged feelings through the shapes of their mouths and nces.


    Carynne was amazed by that brief moment of connection. They were strangers. And it was hardly a conversation, yet she could feel such a strong camaraderie in that one instant��it felt almost miraculous.


    Eventually, after much struggle, Ise had five dresses tailored.


    After exhausting herself in front of Ise, Madame Devinel looked relieved as if a throbbing tooth had been extracted, and she was about to write down when to deliver the dresses, asking for the address. Upon hearing it was the Grand Cathedral, her face turned awkward.


    ��Merchants are forbidden from entering the Grand Cathedral.��


    ��Why is that when I��m just getting what I need?��


    ��It��s the rule.��


    It was to prevent luxury goods that could be seen as bribes.


    ��If you were carrying the items yourself, perhaps it would be fine. However, for the store to deliver them directly is difficult because it would draw significant criticism.��


    ��How am I supposed to carry them if they��re heavy?��


    ��I apologize.��


    ��Look here! I��ve already paid for everything��!��


    Madame Devinel bowed her head slightly in apology, but her face didn��t look very remorseful. Instead, there was a slightly amused expression as if she found Ise��s frustration somewhat satisfying.


    ***

 Chapter 226

    Chapter 226


    ��I��m sorry. But carrying it yourself is the only way.��


    ��I have another appointment right now!��


    Ise had nned to meet Zion immediately. Carynne, standing a step behind, watched as Ise and Madame Devinel��s voices grew louder, feeling a bit drained by the esction.


    Nheless, Ise got what she wanted. Even though Ise grumbled for now, that dress was certainly her favorite, and Countess Luce, who was short on money, was one of the few nobles who would wee Ise warmly in that outfit. Ise would surely be satisfied with today��s choice.


    The Luce Countdom��s townhouse had quite decent tulips in the garden. Were they blooming now? Perhaps Carynne could see them if she visited with Ise. Had she taken a step closer to being a friend today?


    She had also thoroughly studied tulips. She could maintain a decent conversation. She clenched her fist.


    ��Then Carynne, you bring that over.��


    ��What, me?��


    ��Yes.��


    ��������


    ��It seemed she was one step closer to being a<em>maid</em>rather than a friend.


    * * *


    Dressesden with decorations were quite heavy. Five such dresses constituted a tremendous burden. Carynne, looking at the luggage ced next to her, was engulfed in contemtion. She could take a carriage up to the front of the Grand Cathedral. But could she carry it herself from there to the annex?


    She would have to ask someone else for help, but the vicar was the problem. He disapproved of young womening and going already, and he often reprimanded Carynne. He saw the hospitality extended to her as<em>excessive</em>indulgence.


    ����Should I just carry it all myself?��


    What was particrly bitter was the difficulty of bing friends with Ise. Initially, she thought there would be no obstacles after Ise broke up with Raymond. And when they had sessfully navigated a potentially major obstacle with Duke Luthe, hope had shone like gold.


    But that was then, and this was now.


    Bing friends was an entirely different matter. It was even different from dealing with men. Men instinctively showed a degree of fondness, but women of the same age, precisely Ise, were different. Carynne felt a sense of self-loathing as her maid-like behavior towards Ise naturally surfaced.


    ��Could it be that I just naturally have a maid��s instinct?��


    It was a genuinely servile instinct, it seemed. Carynne was usually in a position tomand maids and servants, not to bemanded by someone. No, it was not supposed to be that way. But those numerous memories of attending to Ise naturally flowed out.


    When talking, she would watch Ise��s mood and unterally cater to her whims, choosing things that Ise would like. The problem was that this did not endear herself to Ise. Perhaps it��s just that Ise had a twisted personality��she would not grow fonder of those who catered to her but instead regarded them as beneath her.


    Carynne sat on the luggage, closing her eyes as the noon sun shone much too brightly at her lids.


    ��I told you so.��


    There was no need to open her eyes because she knew who it was.


    With her eyes still closed, Carynne merely waved her hand.


    ��Don��t nag right now, I��m<em>thinking</em>. But Sir Raymond, did you have a good trip?��


    ��Yes. I took care of my business.��


    Raymond helped Carynne to her feet. He pointed to the carriage and took on Ise��s, specifically Carynne��s, luggage instead. Carynne couldn��t even think about lifting it herself, but in his hands, it��s as if she was as light as an empty box. Carynne tried to lift another one but gave up when it didn��t budge, leaving it to Raymond.


    Seeing the name of the boutique written on the box, Raymond asked.


    ��Are these yours?��


    ��They��re Miss Ise��s.��


    ��Why aren��t you buying something for yourself too?��


    ��I don��t have any money.��


    ��Miss Ise isn��t even paying for you? Hmm. That��s a bit too much.��


    ��I don��t expect much from her, really.��


    Carynne spoke cautiously, trying not to sound bitter in the girl��s defense, but Raymond shook his head disapprovingly and said as he walked beside her.


    ��Are you going to the annex of the Grand Cathedral?��


    ��Yes. You��re not allowed to enter though.��


    ��I��ve already spoken to the caretaker.��


    ��Will you also be staying at the Grand Cathedral?��


    ��Not officially. But since I��ve spoken to them, you won��t need to be too cautious. And.��


    Raymond handed the luggage to the coachman, then looked down at Carynne and said.


    ��Just say it��s under my name. I��ll pay for itter. My butler at the manor will handle it. It bothers me to see you just carrying luggage and not able to buy anything in front of Miss Evans. Feel free to buy whatever you like.��


    ��Oh, then.��


    Raymond��s meaning was clear. He lifted Carynne into the carriage, and said,


    ��Yes. I am now Baron Saytes.��


    * * *


    During Carynne��s journey to the capital with Ise, Raymond had gone back to his family��s estate to handle his business. Things turned out a little different than expected. Raymond had been considering a simr approach as before.


    Baron Saytes, his older brother, had been as good as dead to him for over a hundred years now. And he was soon to die again. There was no guilt in killing him prematurely.


    ��I��m going to try and be friends with Miss Ise.��


    ��I want to let you do what you want to do.��


    If Carynne had specifically told him that she didn��t want his older brother dead, then he wouldn��t have gone ahead.


    <em>��Haa.��</em>


    Raymond was not enthused. More than the repulsion ofmitting fratricide, he regretted the opportunities he would miss by not killing his brother immediately. But throughout the years as he aged, he realized just how useful and necessary a title of nobility was.


    And that title was needed to protect Carynne.


    ��Do as you please.��


    Carynne, all too naturally, said she disliked harming others and desired peace. But really? Raymond found that hard to believepletely.


    In fact, even a hundred years ago, he always felt this way. Even though Carynne, Prince Lewis, Ise Evans, and Verdic Evans thought him moral, he did not see himself that way.


    And even now, with Carynne pushing his back, he still held no sympathy for his brother at all. If anything, he rather thought that the servants and maids who suffered at his brother��s hands were those who deserved pity. Some had been beaten so badly they ended up with permanent disabilities.


    Over time, more certain rtionships could be affirmed. Such was his rtionship with his older brother. Their rtionship was like a flower on a single branch��but that branch was rotting with disease. Pruning the right branch could allow the rest of the tree to survive.


    It was an arrogant yet utterly realistic judgment. Through spilled memories and repeated lives, Raymond could be sure.


    There were just some rtionships that should not be held in expectation anymore.


    His older brother��s life had consistently ended within a year from now, if not in a few months��typically in an ident. Until the day before his death, he would be violent towards others, high on drugs, and predatory towards women.


    The first time Raymond killed his brother, it wasn��t guilt that overwhelmed.


    It was regret that he hadn��t done it sooner.


    ***

 Chapter 227

    Chapter 227


    ��Have you arrived, Young Master?��


    The butler bowed deeply as he greeted Raymond. There was a bruise on his temple.


    ��To beat James like this, who had served the family since their parents�� generation.


    Knowing James��s lifespan, Raymond felt a pang of sorrow. The old butler would die of a stroke in a few years. Suddenly, too many people he hadn��t thought about crowded his mind.


    ��Where is my brother?��


    ��Baron Saytes is in the drawing room.��


    ��Tell him I��ll go see him now. I��m heading there right away.��


    ��Understood.��


    A spark of resolve shed in him.��What about Xenon, Young Master? I thought he woulde with you.��


    ��As I gained experience, I found I needed Xenon��s help less and less. So, I asked him to do something else.��


    ��I see�� To be honest, we weren��t expecting you, so we��re a bit unprepared.��


    Bits of damage were visible here and there around the manor. The servants looked gloomy, and the maintenance was clearly neglected. With an invalid as the master and no mistress, the state of things was not good. Seeing James ashamed, Raymond lightly patted his shoulder.


    ��Don��t worry about it. This is my home.��


    ����Yes, sir.��


    Raymond took a fresh look around his own house. Each part, he had once intended to clean and maintain himself, seemed not as vast as it once had with servants around. As Raymond headed to the drawing room, the people inside opened the door with tense expressions.


    ��Brother.��


    ��You��re here, Raymond.��


    Baron Saytes, holding a bottle of liquor, looked at Raymond entering the drawing room.


    Raymond sat down in front of his brother.


    ��Aren��t you supposed to be in the army still? And what��s wrong with your eye?��


    ����I got out early.��


    ��Didn��t go blind, did you?��


    ��Not sure.��


    It bes easier with age. Knowing where to blow things up and whom to kill was the easiest part in war. The hardest part was saving people.


    Killing his older brother became easy, too. The version of his brother during Raymond��s childhood might have beenrge, but now, a single knife in his hands could end him in minutes.


    ��Brother, I broke off my engagement with Ise Evans.��


    ����What?��


    The massive body swayed. The baron��s face contorted.


    ��You�� crazy little�� Who are you to�� What about Verdic Evans�� Is it because of your eye?��


    ��That��s not it.��


    ��Then why! Damn it, <i>why?!</i> I need to meet Verdic right now. This is insane�� Even so, to break off the engagement����


    ��Brother.��


    Raymond met the baron��s eyes as he spoke.


    ��Ise Evans and I simply aren��t right for each other.��


    A long silence followed.


    But it was only a reprieve because the baron didn��t understand what he meant. As he began toprehend, his face grew redder and purpler.


    ��Did you�� say this?��


    ��Yes.��


    ��You goddamn�� idiot! You imbecile! You know nothing but how to shoot!��


    It would be easier that way.


    Raymond stood up as the baron approached him, his face red with rage.


    ��I absolutely cannot allow this! You fool�� You need a beating toe to your senses��!��


    ��Brother.��


    Subduing him was easy. Despite his size, with his body having grownzy and corpulent from an indolent lifestyle, the baron was slow, and Raymond��unusually fit even amongst military men��no longer needed to seek his brother��s permission.


    * * *


    Carynne looked up at Raymond��s side profile.


    ��With the Baron�� Did you resolve things well with your brother?��


    ��Yes, I resolved it well.��


    Carynne seemed concerned. She recalled something he said to her when he was 117.


    He once told her that he couldn��t trust what she said. That she knew nothing. That she didn��t even know his brother would die. That she didn��t even know herself�� So, at the end of the day, these were reasons why he could love her.


    After that, Carynne had been bothered that Raymond never mentioned anything about his family to her again.


    ��I sent my brother to a hospital.��


    Carynne��s eyes widened in surprise.


    ��Isn��t�� Isn��t that a bit too much?��


    Most hospital wards were in deplorable conditions. Therefore, it was natural for families who could afford it to keep their loved ones at home and have a doctor visit them.


    Perhaps she thought it didn��t align with his past behavior of considering others.


    But Carynne only knew one side of Raymond. Wishing for him to walk a better path, the method of simply bearing everyone��s burdens was not a better path for Raymond at all.


    ��This was the best way.��


    If left unchecked, Baron Saytes would cause someone��s demise. And the baron himself was going to die soon anyway. Raymond thought it would be more sinful to just leave him be.


    There was no way for him and his brother to fully reconcile. The baron had lived too long in a haze of drugs andziness. It was not better to let him keep his title of nobility intact.


    ��Carynne, maybe�� bing just friends isn��t the better option. You said you have plenty of time, but realistically, it��s not that much. The ovepping of time really only happens between us two, and Miss Ise probably doesn��t know much about you.��


    * * *


    ��Why did you say that?��


    Zion scratched his head as he watched Raymond sit down dejectedly.


    ��What��s wrong with what I said?��


    Raymond murmured gloomily, staring down at his drink in a dark tavern. Zion found it hard to adapt to the sudden change in Raymond��s demeanor and struggled to respond. He then asked him, while taking his share.


    ��Are you drunk?��


    ��No.��


    Raymond was known for his capacity to hold his liquor. Even when mischievous superiors made him drink crates at a time, his face remained unaltered. There was no way he was drunk after barely drinking a ss.


    ��It would be better if he <i>were</i> drunk.��


    Zion Electra found it ufortable watching Raymond��s gloomy state. He did not want to disy themendable friendship of consoling him.


    ��I need to meet Miss Ise quickly.��


    The cause of Raymond��s gloom was Ise Evans, who Zion was earnestly trying to impress.


    ��Um�� Sir Raymond, I should go now����


    ��Why does Miss Ise speak to Carynne like she��s ordering around a toon?��


    ��������


    It didn��t seem like he would let it go.


    Zion wanted to avoid Raymond��smenting grip but realized it was impossible. All he could do was sigh.


    Raymond had been very gloomytely.


    ��I��m going to be friends with Miss Ise.��


    While Carynne��s efforts with Ise didn��t please him, he tried to understand it. The reason she was acting this way was ultimately because of Raymond himself.


    And thinking of his enduring connection with Ise Evans, he somewhat agreed with her desire to get along better.


    ��Why����


    However, Ise��s obvious reluctance to be closer to Carynne saddened Raymond. While Carynne seemed only slightly dejected, watching her like this tore Raymond��s heart.


    He was on the verge of begging at gatherings of distinguisheddies in high society to help Carynne make other friends.


    Of course, he refrained, knowing Carynne would want to smash his head for such actions, but nevertheless, Raymond found Ise��s recent treatment of Carynne utterly unreasonable.


    ��Why does she do that when I��m not around?��


    Raymond could still remember the interactions between Ise and Carynne in the past.


    Ise always had her ws out for Carynne. No matter how much Carynne tried to amodate her and worked diligently, no matter how miserable she became, Ise never seemed satisfied.

 Chapter 228

    Chapter 228


    This all boiled down to Ise thinking that Carynne was the reason Raymond didn��t love her. Therefore, Raymond thought it would be okay if he broke up with Ise in a way that smeared his own reputation.


    ��Sir Zion, are you doing well with the task I assigned to you? Of spreading rumors about me?��


    ��I spend at least an hour criticizing you every time I meet Miss Ise, Sir Raymond.��


    Zion answered promptly.


    ��Do you want to hear the details?��


    ����No.��


    Zion Electra��s words must be true. Rather, it might turn out to be an eventual problem because he was trying too hard. Recently, even Marquis Penceir sent a letter. It was a letter advising that Zion��s behavior was too dissolute.


    ����Just continue what you��re doing.��


    ��Understood. I��ll keep working hard.������Alright.��


    The worse his reputation, the more it would help Carynne, in various ways. But Raymond was so displeased and worried about how Ise treated Carynne that he was nearly falling into depression.


    Even if he had broken up with Ise and even if Ise didn��t know about his rtionship with Carynne, and even though Zion yed along to his whims, the rtionship between Ise and Carynne was another problem. Removing himself wouldn��t necessarily make Carynne and Ise close friends.


    Fundamentally, Ise didn��t like women her age very much, and Carynne also had almost no friends around her. Moreover, possibly because of her long experience amodating Ise��s whims as a maid, Carynne continued to show such steadfast deference to Ise.


    But to Raymond, that looked more like she was entering a lower hierarchy, not bing friends. It seemed even more tantly hierarchical than his and Zion��s rtionship. When Ise left Carynne with her luggage and went out with Zion, Raymond was so angry he wanted to challenge Zion to a duel.


    ��What��s wrong with Carynne����


    ��That��s one thing, and this is another. Do you know what being overly self-conscious is? Sir Raymond, she might dislike you regardless.��


    ��Shut up, Zion.��


    ��Yes, shall I leave then?��


    ��No, don��t go, Sir Zion.��


    ��Ugh, seriously, what do you want me to do? Miss Ise and Lady Carynne Hare have to figure it out themselves.��


    ��Why does Ise Evans speak to Carynne like she��smanding a toon?��


    At the repeated line, Zion looked at Raymond, who seemed about to melt into the floor in his depression.


    Love may change people, but Raymond had changed <i>too</i> much in a short time. Was it because it was his first rtionship? He seemed to have be strange too quickly.


    Until just a few months ago, he was a very rational superior, but how had he ended up like this?


    Zion clicked his tongue.


    ��You��re drunk, Sir Raymond.��


    ��I��ve said before, I��m not drunk, Sir Zion.��


    ��You look no different from being drunk. Can you let me go now? I also need to meet Miss Ise.��


    ��Why does Ise����


    ��Stop it. And right now, Miss Ise is dating <i>me</i>. If you continue to speak ill of her, I won��t stay quiet.��


    ��If you won��t stay quiet then�� <i>Haa.��</i>


    Raymond straightened up. In the dimly lit store, his only eye shone.


    ��Sir Zion, are you really together with Ise now��?��


    ��Please consider my feelings too, seeing her ex-fianc�� right in front of me. Miss Ise isn��t necessarily a good person, but she <i>is</i> charming. There must be some reason for her actions.��


    ��That��s unexpected. Honestly, I��ve never understood your rtionships with women.��


    Raymond straightened his posture and looked at Zion with an unfamiliar gaze. Zion, with a displeased expression, handed him a bottle of alcohol.


    ��As I��ve mentioned before, my love is always genuine.��


    However, Zion��s wordscked credibility considering his history with women. Zion and Raymond got along well in some aspects, particrly inbat, but they did not see eye to eye when it came to interpersonal rtionships.


    ����Well, I��m not one to talk.��


    ��I��m d you realize that.��


    ��Then, as the person who saved your life, I have one request. Please help improve the rtionship between those two.��


    ��No. I refuse.��


    Zion was rmed by Raymond��s request.


    Ise and Zion had just started their rtionship. And he was supposed to talk to Ise about Carynne? Mentioning another woman in front of the one he��s dating waspletely out of the question.


    Zion, who was desperate to keep women happy and was good at it, firmly declined walking into that pit of fire. The problem was that the one making the request was none other than Raymond.


    ��Do I need to remind you of everything I remember?��


    ��Ahh, Sir Raymond! Why bring up that issue again? Issues between women should be resolved by women themselves. Why are you interfering�� I just don��t understand.��


    Towards the end, Zion��s voice trailed off. He owed his life to Raymond, and not just once. Raymond had not emphasized it, so Zion had forgotten. Zion acknowledged that he had to listen.


    But even so, Zion couldn��t understand why Raymond was going to such lengths. Not even married men concern themselves with their wives�� friendships to this extent.


    ��I just wish Ise would be kinder to Carynne.��


    A sigh escaped Zion at Raymond��s earnest expression.


    ����That��s between the two of them. Just let it be. Rtionships aren��t something others can meddle in. And they haven��t even known each other that long.��


    ��You and Miss Ise have had enough time to grow close, why haven��t Ise and Carynne by now?��


    ��People are different, you know. With time, you��ll see whether they get along or not. From what I see, they don��t seem to mesh well.��


    ��Then that��s a problem.��


    Raymond responded with a despondent voice.


    ��There��s not much time.��


    ��What are you talking about?��


    ��������


    He did not speak any further.


    * * *


    ��Isn��t arriving on time the least bit of courtesy?��


    Fortunately, Ise hadn��t left and was still at the fountain in the promised square, though her expression was icy. Zion inwardly clicked his tongue at his own blunder.


    Zion absolutely detested meddling in other people��s trivial rtionships. Knowing when to step out ofplex affairs with women was his creed. If you don��t know when to extract yourself, you could end up stabbed.


    Instinct screamed not to bother with unnecessary matters. What��s the point? It��s neither a love affair, a blood rtion, nor a friendship. Why should he get involved in other people��s business?


    There was hardly enough time to focus on Ise right in front of him. Zion bowed to kiss Ise��s hand. The courteous gesture seemed to please her, as her voice softened overhead.


    ��I won��t wait again in the future.��


    ��It won��t happen again.��


    ��Never again.��


    ��Yes.��


    Ise seemed about to say more but then stopped. Her cheeks were puffed in anger, but the sight of Zion��s smooth face seemed to soften her anger. Zion Electra��s straight nose brushed over the back of Ise��s hand, and his round eyes gazed at her.

 Chapter 229

    Chapter 229


    He gave off a different atmospherepared to Raymond. He had a more slender and youthful charm. And certainly, his favorable attitude towards Ise earned him significant pointspared to Raymond.


    ��Why were youte?��


    ��There was something I needed to handle in the army.��


    ��Oh dear, you must have had a tough time.��


    ��Thank you for understanding.��


    Technically speaking, he wasn��t lying��the army was the army. Zion recalled Raymond��s not-so-much-a-request. The frustration of why he had to do such things crossed his mind, but what could he do? Orders were orders. Even if Raymond wasn��t his direct superior, he owed him countless debts from the past.


    ��How have you beentely, Miss Ise?��


    ��Just so-so.��


    ��That��s good to hear. I was worried that the Grand Cathedral might not be a veryfortable ce. What about somewhere else? If you��re okay with it, I can find a ce for you to stay.��Perhaps her staying at the Grand Cathedral made her unusually sensitive. When she was with Zion, Ise wasn��t usually so particr. So Zion thought that being away from Carynne might actually improve their rtionship.


    ��No, I can��t stay anywhere else.��


    ��Why not?��


    ��I have to consider my father��s reputation.��


    Ise answered with a pout.


    It was an unexpected response.


    ����I thought you wouldn��t care about such things since you ran away from home.��


    ��Hmph, how could I not care? After all, my entire financial foundationes from my father.��


    It was harder for Ise not to know. When she ran away, she took Verdic��s seal and stamp, along with various jewels and cash. There was a bank ount in Ise��s name, but she couldn��t predict when Verdic might freeze it.


    The Grand Cathedral was one of the few ces where Verdic couldn��t easily reach, but it wasn��t impossible. However, Verdic hadn��t yete to take Ise back. Her bank ount hadn��t been frozen either. Even without directmunication, his actions spoke volumes.


    <i>��Have your fun ande back.��</i>


    Verdic hadn��t reprimanded Ise for her first act of rebellion.


    So she decided to maintain the minimum level of decorum despite her unease.


    Staying somewhere else, especially with a man like Zion, would negatively impact Verdic��s reputation. Even though she had run away, staying at the Grand Cathedral wouldn��t cause much scandal. Ise decided to maintain at least that much.


    ��Are you not ufortable staying with Miss Carynne?��


    Zion asked, considering Ise��s exnation.


    ��Why are you bringing her up?��


    ��It��s natural to feel ufortable living with someone you��re not familiar with. Actually, I suggested it because I thought you might be ufortable living with Miss Carynne Hare.��


    Zion emphasized that he had no interest in Carynne whatsoever.


    ��Why would I be ufortable with Carynne? It��s rare to find someone so easygoing.��


    Ise��s expression turned uneasy at the mention of Carynne��s name, but she quickly gave Zion the answer he wanted to hear.


    ��That��s why it��s even more unsettling.��


    It was a perplexing answer.


    ��Isn��t that a good thing?��


    Zion questioned, not understanding, but Ise shook her head.


    ��No! It definitely means she has deeper ulterior motives! She never shares anything bad about herself, always says nice things, and agrees with everything. That means she has much deeper and hidden motives than those who show their cards.��


    Carynne meticulously chose things that Ise would like and acted ordingly.


    That was the problem.


    Relying on her memories, Carynne did everything Ise liked, but it backfired because it was too perfect, raising suspicions. Carynne never got angry at anything Ise did, always amodating and trying to win her favor.


    But Carynne overlooked one thing.


    Ise��s life was different from most people��s and that romantic rtionships and friendships were not the same for her.


    Ise had seen too many people around her waiting for the crumbs to fall their way, so she couldn��t help but be suspicious of Carynne��s approach. Carynne was different from the men who were easily won over by her smile.


    She even deliberately put Carynne in ufortable situations, like making her carry luggage, embarrassing her in front of others, calling her during dates with Zion, or showing off jewelry Carynne could never afford.


    Every time Carynne endured these moments, Ise only grew more suspicious.


    ��Sheughs and brushes everything off. Is that normal?��


    * * *


    ����Even if I treat her well��.��


    Carynne��s face hardened at Raymond��s words.


    ��Isn��t it enough by now?��


    ��Anyway, thank you, Sir Raymond.��


    Carynne said thoughtfully while chewing on her pen. Raymond, sitting on Carynne��s desk, spoke to her.


    Raymond often snuck in while wearing a disguise, but it was only possible during times when there were fewer people around. Because he would soon need to leave again, Raymond wanted Carynne to focus on him.


    ��No, I want to hear you say it��s enough now.��


    <i>And maybe even a kiss.</i> But Carynne, with a contemtive look, brushed off Raymond��s arm.


    ��It��s not a man��s ce to meddle in women��s affairs.��


    ��������


    ��Just kidding. Anyway, I need to think about it more.��


    ��There��s no need to think about it.��


    ��I think epting Ise could be a step toward facing the world, rather than just staying in our own little world.��


    ��I��m perfectly fine staying in our own little world.��


    But Carynne quieted him by tapping his lips with her fingers and resumed writing her letter.


    ��Who are you writing to?��


    ��My father.��


    ��To Lord Hare?��


    Carynne nodded.


    ��Yes. He��ll be surprised to know how hard I��ve been workingtely. Sir Raymond, even though Nancy ran away, I��m doing my best to treat each person well. I want to find a better, more righteous path. And I think it��s worth trying for about a year.��


    Raymond sighed. Wasn��t it ineffective? Bing friends with Ise Evans was a tough road, and they weren��t a good match from the start. But Carynne still seemed unwilling to give up.


    Carynne finished her letter, tapped the paper to dry the ink, and spoke to Raymond.


    ��I��m going to confess to Ise Evans.��


    ����I hope it��s not what I��m thinking.��


    Raymond looked down at Carynne with a frown. What was Carynne talking about? Confess? To Ise? Carynne will? Even if it was to be friends, what kind of cruel joke was this?


    ��It��s exactly what you��re thinking. But no matter what you say, Sir Raymond, I won��t listen.��


    ��No, Carynne. I oppose this. How could you�� leave me��.��


    Raymond��s face turned pale. What was Carynne talking about? A confession? To Ise? Even if it was just to be friends, what kind of awful joke was this?


    ��We can��t live together just the two of us forever. Two is too few.��


    ��Absolutely not.��


    ns to move Carynne somewhere else rapidly formed in Raymond��s mind. It would be better for them to stay alone together for a while. Carynne, upset by Raymond��s firm answer, raised her voice.


    ��When have I ever needed your permission to act?��


    ��Even so, I can��t allow it.��


    ��Even if Ise doesn��t believe me, I��ll try!��


    ��Why are you lying?��


    ��What? What are you talking about? I��m trying to tell the whole truth.��


    ����The truth? Carynne, you��.��


    ��I know it sounds crazy.��


    Carynne��s demeanor did not change.


    ��Sir Raymond, are you crying?��


    ��������


    Her tone was outright disdainful. How could she?


    ��No, do you hate the idea of confessing to Ise that much?��


    ����What?��


    ��I know she won��t believe it anyway, okay? But�� fine. If you hate it that much, I won��t do it. Geez��.��


    It took a long time to clear up the misunderstanding.


    Raymond, his face flushed bright red, repeatedly apologized to Carynne, but the look in Carynne��s eyes did not soften for a long time.

 Chapter 230

    Chapter 230


    * * *


    Rtionships between people are exceedingly difficult.


    Nothing ever flowed as expected.


    But Carynne wanted to approach things more sincerely. She wanted to genuinely feel what it was like to take responsibility for living a real life. It was all the more important for someone like Ise, who was both close and distant.


    ��Ise, I have something to talk to you about.��


    Carynne knocked on Ise��s doorte at night. Ise, in her nightgown, opened the door and looked at Carynne with a face showing signs of considerable fatigue.


    ��If it��s not important, can��t it wait until morning?��


    ��It is important.��


    ����What is it?����Can we talk inside?��


    Ise stood at the door, reluctant to move, but not having a good reason to refuse, she opened the door.


    ��I have things to do tomorrow, so please make it quick.��


    ��Okay.��


    Carynne entered Ise��s room.


    ��������


    It was messy. There was nothing to be done about it.


    Ise had no experience with cleaning, so she lived surrounded by clutter. Yet, just two days ago, Carynne had cleaned everything while helping Ise get dressed.


    In just two days, the room was again cluttered with clothes, receipts, and magazines scattered everywhere. Even the bed was covered with magazines. Ise, seeing Carynne standing with no ce to sit, hurriedly pushed some magazines off the bed and gestured for her to sit.


    ��T-Thank you.��


    It was hard to believe how different things were in the same room. When Carynne worked at Ise��s house, she would have been scolded for even a speck of dust. But when Ise had to clean up herself, she seemed perfectly content with the mess.


    Sleeping in such a room and yet looking immacte and morous when going out was astonishing.


    As Carynne gingerly sat on the bed, Ise leaned against the desk and asked her,


    ��So, what do you want to talk about?��


    Carynne steadied her pounding heart and confessed to Ise.


    ��Ise, the truth is, I��m much older than I look.��


    ����That��s quite shocking.��


    ��In fact, I��ve died ande back to life over a hundred times.��


    <i>I want to tell someone. I want someone to understand my situation. I want to share my story.</i>


    This desire burst forth uncontrobly. The desire to speak out. It wasn��t enough that only Raymond knew the same situation. She wanted to confess to someone who didn��t know her.


    <i>I��ve died over a hundred times. You and I were never on good terms. I��m going to die again soon. Do you know why? Because I can��t get pregnant. The reasons for my deaths vary, but I can never escape this situation. I will live like this forever.</i>


    <i>I want to be friends with you.</i>


    <i>Because I��ve never seeded before.</i>


    Ise��s face changed in many ways.


    She looked pathetic, terrified, and even turned pale.


    Carynne carefully left out any mention of her attempts to kill Ise, focusing solely on her own tragedy. Ise might start by pitying her. Perhaps that��s where human rtionships begin. By showing mercy to each other.


    Carynne��s story went on for a long time, and finally, Ise responded.


    ����Alright. I understand.��


    ��Do you believe me?��


    Ise nodded.


    Carynne��s eyes widened. How could that be?


    Even Raymond couldn��t believe her immediately. Her father didn��t believe her until the very end. The only one who believed was Dun, who had nned everything. But Ise just believed her? Why? Carynne hade prepared to be pped, but now she felt deted. Why do you believe me?


    Ise, hesitating, ced her hand on Carynne��s shoulder, who was confused.


    Then, slowly, Ise spoke to Carynne.


    ��Yes. So�� um�� Carynne, let��s go to the hospital together when the sun rises tomorrow.��


    Ise��s eyes resembled those of Raymond in the past.


    The past.


    ����You think I��m crazy, don��t you?��


    Ise averted her gaze.


    ����Alcohol addiction isn��t something to be ashamed of. It��s a secret, but my father also received treatment for alcoholism in the past.��


    ��I��m not an alcoholic.��


    If anything, it��s a drug addiction.


    As expected. Carynne let out a small sigh. She had tried to get closer and even revealed her secret, but the reaction was like this. Maybe this was the normal response. Ise spoke seriously.


    ��Don��t be too ashamed. The hospitals supported by the Evans family are top-notch. Even the Avon Monastery is under our umbre.��


    ����I��m not crazy��.��


    Carynne raised her hand to cover her eyes. Was it a mistake to do this sote at night? She had hoped for some sympathy, but being dismissed as crazy was a bit bitter. Especially since she initially thought Ise believed her.


    ��But isn��t it better than nothing? Let��s at least go to the hospital and get checked out.��


    The cross-verification was already done by Raymond a long time ago.


    Carynne thought it might not be necessary, but seeing Ise��s serious face, she nodded. No matter the oue, going again wouldn��t be a bad idea.


    ����Yes, I will dly ept your kindness, Miss Ise.��


    * * *


    Ise Evans felt a bit creeped out by how detailed Carynne Hare��s delusions were. When Carynne mumbled and gradually became more passionate in her speech, she looked almost <i>mad</i>. The way she spewed out words without even pausing for breath was enough to exhaust the listener.


    ����So young, it��s pitiful��.��


    But it did evoke some sympathy. Though it was a sympathy that made her want to distance herself. Ise was shocked by what the doctor said.


    ����That can��t be.��


    ��It��s certain. Shall I tell her myself, Miss Ise?��


    The elderly doctor spoke to Ise as if it were no big deal. Doctors are so indifferent to everything. But for the listener, it was shocking. What he said was something she couldn��t believe.


    ��No, no�� Don��t tell her yet.��


    Ise clenched her fists, thinking of Carynne waiting outside. Ise had brought Carynne for various tests.


    ��Admitting she��s crazy might help her a bit.��


    Living next door to her, Ise was caught between sympathy and fear. Thinking Carynne was out of her mind turned her mild irritation into fear. But it was also true that Carynne had been kind to her, which is why Ise brought her to the hospital.


    Among Carynne��s nonsensical talks, Ise was especially ufortable with her obsession with pregnancy. In a country where religion dominated society, it wasn��t something a seventeen-year-old, who was practically still a girl, should be preupied with.


    ��Are you really sure?��


    ��Yes, I am certain.��


    * * *


    Carynne Hare is pregnant.

 Chapter 231

    Chapter 231


    <i>����Haa.��</i>


    Ise sighed deeply, feeling as though the ground beneath her was sinking. Shemented why she had to worry so much.


    In the cathedral garden, there was an early-blooming rose garden. It was a beautiful garden, driven more by capital than by praise for God.


    However, it did not meet Ise��s standards, and there were many other ces to visit in the capital, so she didn��t feel the need to visit the rose garden. At least, not until today.


    Ise felt pitiful, unable to go out to the city or enter the cathedral, nervously praying in the garden. She was even praying herself.


    ��God, what should I say to Carynne?��


    Staying at the cathedral, Ise had started praying to God for the first time in years. It felt awkward since she hadn��t done it in so long, but she couldn��t avoid it. It was that much of a headache.


    ��Donate only when it��s good for tax purposes, make the most noise when helping others, and never get involved in undesirable situations.��


    She should have followed her father��s advice to stay out of matters that didn��t bring benefits. Ise sped her hands together, looking up at the grand cathedral between the rose bushes.��Why did I do something I don��t normally do��.��


    She couldn��t bring herself to enter the main hall to pray. If she, who never usually prayed, were seen praying, any priest would ask her what was wrong, and Ise wasn��t confident she could answer naturally.


    Moreover, she wasn��t confident in talking to Carynne Hare, who would be in the main hall at this time. So, Ise had stayed up all night and came out to the garden early in the morning, wracking her brain.


    <i>��Haaa��.��</i>


    * * *


    Carynne had shared all sorts of stories with her. She said she was cursed by something passed down from her mother and that she was of saintly blood from ancient legends. Ise had to clench her fist to keep from reacting to what sounded like the delusions of a teenage girl.


    But that was the least of it. The more detailed the story, the stranger it became.


    ��I��ve lived for more than a hundred years.��


    ��������


    She imed she had died ande back to life numerous times, but Ise was a person ofmon sense. It was a ridiculous story.


    ��Oh, she��s <i>really</i> gone mad.��


    Ise was convinced that Carynne was suffering from some kind of mental illness.


    But there was consistency in her story. It was severe.


    She was particrly disturbed by Carynne��s obsession with pregnancy. They were still barely adults. Carynne imed that to break the curse, she needed to get pregnant, but she was barren. Because of her barrenness, she couldn��t escape the curse.


    From that point on, Ise felt more than just strangeness. She felt a chill.


    Carynne was seventeen years old. How could she be certain of her barrenness? What had she been doing all this time? With that beautiful face? Carynne was out of her mind. And she was far too pretty to be living in the countryside.


    Crazy, beautiful, living in the countryside.


    The implications were clear. She might have been driven mad by some terrible event.


    Ise had heard various things about people through her father. From Verdic��s drunken ramblings, from the gossip of servants, and from those who held grudges against Verdic and came to him.


    Thinking this, she felt goosebumps down her spine. She had to get Carynne to a hospital for an examination. Carynne was someone who shared meals and lodging with her most of the time. Having someone so far gone living right next to her was extremely unsettling for Ise.


    ��I need to take her to the hospital for an examination.��


    So, Ise tried to contact people connected to her father, whom she had been avoiding. She went directly to thergest hospital. It wasn��t too difficult, being in the capital. Ise sought out the old doctor she had seen when she was a child.


    ��Miss Ise Evans? What��s the matter? Are you feeling unwell? Ah, and it would be best for you to return home��.��


    ��It��s not me who��s sick. There��s a girl my age in the room next to mine�� I think there��s something wrong with her.��


    ��You mean the room next to yours in the Grand Cathedral?��


    ��Yes�� So please, as quietly and discreetly as possible.��


    ��Understood.��


    The doctor, having possibly received prior notice from Verdic, readily agreed to her request. Ise was in excellent health. She knew this well herself.


    The problem was Carynne. Again, Ise felt a chill. She had been living and sharing meals with a mentally ill person all this time. Carynne might need to be put in a hospital immediately. Who knows what a crazy person might do?


    After the examination, Ise, with a tense expression, asked the doctor.


    ��Please tell me exactly what Miss Carynne Hare��s condition is. And keep it confidential.��


    ��Yes, understood.��


    ��Is she really insane�� Should she be isted immediately?��


    But the doctor shook his head.


    ��She does not need istion. Her cognitive and thinking abilities are perfectly normal.��


    ��But she told me�� strange�� stories.��


    ��Ah, sheughed and said it was a lie to tease you, Miss Ise. She��s quite a charming youngdy.��


    ��Excuse me?��


    ��And that��s the problem. That youngdy is not in such a situation.��


    Carynne had perfectly pretended to be normal in front of the doctor. Sheughed off the stories she told Ise as mere legends and said she sometimes had nightmares because of them, but that was all.


    It��s unclear what the truth is, but she can behave normally as she did before.


    The real issue was Carynne��s physical condition.


    Carynne Hare was pregnant.


    ��But who��s the father?


    Carynne firmly believed she was barren. She hadn��t considered for a moment that she might be pregnant.


    The idea that Carynne might have gone mad because of some terrible event in the countryside solidified in Ise��s mind.


    If she was that obsessed with pregnancy, it was likely true.


    Should she tell her the truth?


    It might be better to tell her before it��s toote. Ise couldn��t help but be aware of the societal violence against unwed mothers. Even as Verdic��s daughter, an unwed pregnancy was terrifying. In a country where religion dominated society, it was inevitable.


    Should she tell Carynne right now that she��s pregnant?


    * * *


    ��It��s overwhelming��.��


    The sudden, extremely heavy reality crushed Ise.


    Come to think of it, Carynne had been almost like a servant to Ise, attending to her every need during her long stay at the Grand Cathedral.


    It was something Ise couldn��t understand. Even if she requested something from Verdic regarding the Hare estate, it was surprising that Carynne amodated her to this extent. Ise found such behavior unsettling. She was sure Carynne had some ulterior motive.


    Ise felt she was right. The reason Carynne was unsettling was that she was hiding many secrets.


    Perhaps Carynne found it difficult to return to her family. Maybe, after being vited by some scoundrel, she couldn��t go back and was staying willingly with Ise at the Grand Cathedral.


    Unlike Ise, who used the cathedral as a sort of lodging, Carynne attended worship and volunteer work diligently. She showed a deep interest in theology. Was it because her reality was so miserable?


    The more Ise thought about it, the more ces she realized Carynne was invited to in high society. But Carynne only attended a few gatherings with Ise.


    Ise felt increasingly burdened and weighed down by the situation.


    ��I��m not interested in such messy matters����


    Ise slumped under the rose vines.


    What should she say? How should she tell Carynne that she��s pregnant?


    If Carynne were her maid, she could deny it, p her, and throw her out. But Carynne was not her maid.


    Was she a friend? Ise didn��t think so either. Carynne was a strange woman and an ufortable presence in her life. Ise didn��t want to get involved.


    <i>Rustle.</i>


    ��Sir Zion, have you seen Miss Ise?��


    ��Oh, Miss Carynne Hare. It��s been a while.��


    <i>Eek!</i>

 Chapter 232

    Chapter 232


    Ise quickly ducked down. It was Carynne. She calmed her pounding heart and hoped they would pass by quickly. She wasn��t ready to face Carynne yet.


    But the two continued their conversation right above her.


    ��Miss Ise has been missing since this morning. I had something to discuss with her����


    ��Actually, I had an appointment with Miss Ise today, but she didn��t show up, so I came here.��


    ��What? She has an appointment with you, Sir Zion?��


    Oops.


    The person speaking with Carynne was Zion. Ise realized that she had forgotten her date with Zion because she had been so preupied with Carynne. They were supposed to visit an artist��s salon together today. Ise felt resentful toward Carynne.


    ��When did youst see her?��


    ��Well, we visited the hospital together yesterday�� Miss Ise said she would head back first�� When I came out, she was already gone�� Oh my, I haven��t seen her since.����Are you saying she didn��te backst night?��


    Zion��s voice grew urgent.


    Ise was flustered, wondering if she should stand up and announce her presence with ��I��m right here��. But she felt embarrassed about getting up now after hiding.


    ��Yes, it��s really worrying. Should we report her missing?��


    ��Maybe we should contact the Evans estate.��


    ��Oh dear, perhaps we should. I��ll send a telegram to the estate and head to report her missing.��


    <i>No!</i>


    Ise panicked but couldn��t get up even as she heard Carynne��s footsteps fading away. What should she do? What should she say?


    ��Ise, you cane out now.��


    ��������


    ��I can see you����


    ��Yes����


    Ise stood up, her face turning bright red. Zion looked at her with a mix of confusion and concern. She regretted not standing up earlier, but there was no turning back time. Zion moved with Ise to a more secluded spot.


    ��������


    ����Actually, Miss Carynne signaled to me with her finger. She could see you, too.��


    ��I-Is that so?��


    Ise��s face stiffened. She had been avoiding them, but they had both noticed. Carynne would surely ask her about itter. What should she say?


    ����Is something wrong?��


    ��Actually����


    Ise tried to speak but found herself at a loss for words.


    ��The thing is����


    She wanted to confess immediately and defer the decision. If it were a simple matter of a romantic rtionship, she would have told him straight away.


    But the issue was too big. No matter how much she liked Sir Zion, she couldn��t reveal that Carynne, an unmarried woman, was pregnant. It was too sensitive a matter.


    ��Ise,e here.��


    Seeing that Ise couldn��t speak, Zion took off his coat andid it on the ground. He then gestured for her to sit.


    When Ise hesitated and sat on the coat, Zion plopped down next to her on the bare ground.


    ��But the ground is dirty.��


    ��It��s fine. This coat is easy to wash.��


    ����Alright.��


    Zion plucked a rose from a nearby bush and handed it to Ise. When she epted it, he asked,


    ��Do you despise me?��


    ��What? Why?��


    ��Because I plucked this rose. Isn��t it strange to give something that isn��t mine?��


    ��No.��


    Ise shook her head.


    Zion smiled and skillfully ced the rose in her hair.


    ��I actually don��t have any money.��


    ����I know.��


    ��Before I came, I thought about what gift would suit you, but nothing came to mind. In fact, I��ve been thinking about it for a long time. But all I confirmed was that I have very little to offer.��


    Compared to Ise, Zion was just a poormoner. Ise��s affection for him was based purely on his appearance. He wasn��t like Raymond, who had noble blood and usefulness. It was an unstable and fleeting affection.


    ��But I want to listen to your story earnestly. Even if that��s all I can do, I want to give my best. I want to listen and think about it together with you. Will you allow me to do that?��


    * * *


    ��Sir Raymond, aren��t you being a bit too careless these days? Where were youst month? I had something for you to do.��


    Marquis Penceir sat in the restaurant, looking at Raymond with cold eyes.


    Raymond, who had not even taken a seat yet, stopped in his tracks. He had suspected something was wrong ever since the marquis contacted him, but to be spoken to like this before even sitting down meant the marquis was very upset.


    ��I apologize, Marquis. I had matters to resolve with my brother at that time.��


    Raymond answered in a slightly awkward voice, thinking about his brother. In the past, when he had no memory, he couldn��t give up on his brother for a long time. He had believed that his brother would someday return to his good self.


    However, after remembering his brother��s constant deaths over more than a hundred iterations, he could give up quickly. Thinking only of Carynne was enough, and more than anything, he thought it was better to quickly give up on those who needed to be given up on.


    ��If it��s Baron Saytes, I understand. Has his condition improved?��


    ����He��s gotten much better, thank you for your concern.��


    No, Baron Saytes��s condition would never improve.


    He always died early. Walking around drunk and high, he would fall into a creek and drown. His life was always violent.


    For Raymond, his wife was enough family. He had already epted that his older brother had died when he was still a child.


    However, Raymond saw Carynne folding a letter and writing the address on the envelope. This lifetime, Carynne was doing things she had never done before. She looked after each maid, thought of her family, and took care of Ise Evans.


    So Raymond decided to do his best within his limits. Baron Saytes wasn��t getting better, but Raymond still looked after him. Instead, he took away his authority as a baron.


    ��That��s good to hear. But that��s not the only reason I called you. You know that, right?��


    The marquis had not summoned him for just one reason. As he arranged his schedule, the marquis continued speaking to Raymond.


    ��There��s been some unsavory gossip about youtely.��


    ��I don��t pay attention to rumors that aren��t true.��


    ��It doesn��t matter whether they��re true or not. What��s more important is what kind of rumors are spreading. Don��t you understand the importance of maintaining a good reputation when needed? Prince Lewis is concerned about you.��


    Raymond thought about the rumors circting about him. It seemed Zion had been working hard, and the rumors had even reached the marquis. With a genuinely displeased face, the marquis spoke to Raymond.


    ��I can��t understand why you broke off your engagement with that girl Ise. She��s still a valuable asset.��


    ��There��s someone else who genuinely cares for her.��


    ��If that someone is Sir Zion, then I might actually buy you a decent lunch today.��


    ��No need. I��ll keep it light.��


    ����Really?��


    ��Yes.��


    The marquis stopped his writing and called for his attendant. When the attendant, who had been standing outside, entered, the marquis gestured to Raymond. He ordered only a cup of tea.


    ��It��s been a while since we��ve met outside the office.��


    ����It seems I��ve misjudged you. To break ties with Verdic over such a trivial reason�� and for Sir Zion, no less?��


    Marquis Penceir harbored resentment against Verdic. The conflicts had intensified, and weapon prices had skyrocketed since Verdic Evans began meddling with the distribution of military supplies.


    Raymond was merely a pawn to him. One of the links to Verdic.


    It would have been fortunate if someone among Ise or Raymond��s subordinates maintained ties, but if it were Zion, things would be different. Verdic would never be satisfied with Zion. He was far inferior to Raymond.


    Verdic would undoubtedly find it suspicious and might dig deeper.


    A brief investigation into Zion��s background would immediately lead to Raymond. Delving into their rtionship would naturally reveal their military and academy connections, and the marquis would not be far removed either. Using Zion as a recement for Raymond was not a good choice for the marquis.

 Chapter 233

    Chapter 233


    ��I didn��t know you��d keep making such poor choices.��


    The marquis��s eyes grew colder. Raymond knew that the man before him was already calcting and reassessing his usefulness. Having lived a long life, Raymond��s intuition had be sharper.


    But Raymond, having lived long, had more cards up his sleeve. It didn��t matter if Prince Lewis no longer admired him or if he had no ties to Verdic.


    ��May I tell you something else?��


    ��Trying to cover up momentarily won��t help, Sir Raymond. If you want to change the subject, you��d better have something substantial. Do you think you have any appeal to me without Verdic Evans?��


    ��I��m sure you��ll like hearing it.��


    ��Let me warn you, if you bring up the Crown Prince, you won��t be showing up in front of me for a while.��


    Raymond shook his head. He didn��t know what the crown prince thought of him now. But that didn��t matter to him. He focused on what he needed to do.


    ��Marquis, I��m sure you��ve noticed that the recent string of serial murders has stopped. I��d like to tell you more about that.������That��s not a pleasant topic for a meal. I��ll change my order from meat to something else.��


    The marquis switched to a different type of tea.


    Raymond took a map from his coat pocket. It showed the locations where the incidents had urred and the ces he had prevented them.


    ��The rumors about me frequenting the red-light district were because of this investigation.��


    ��What is this?��


    ��I need your cooperation regarding the serial murder cases.��


    Even without Verdic, Raymond had plenty of useful cards.


    The marquis would undoubtedly appreciate this information. Raymond knew what the marquis would find valuable.


    * * *


    Could survival be possible in this lifetime?


    This time, truly, could she survive?


    He hoped so. He loved her for trying to be a better person. This time, he had to seed.


    Raymond felt a grim sense of hope.


    * * *


    ����Alright.��


    Ise stood up abruptly and spoke to Zion.


    ��Not saying anything because it��s burdensome is more burdensome, so I��ll tell you. When in doubt, it��s better to say it. Money can handle the aftermath.��


    She hadn��t told Zion everything, but talking helped her make up her mind. Zion shook her hand and encouraged her.


    ��I don��t know what it is, but I hope it goes well.��


    ��Yes.��


    Ise had decided. It was best to tell Carynne.


    No matter how unsettling Carynne was, not telling her would keep Ise feeling uneasy. It was right to tell her the truth and give her the chance to make a decision.


    And she knew that she had enough allowance to handle the situation with Carynne. Ise tried to think lightly. It might not be such a big deal. She had a lot of money. She realized that the more she thought about it, the more it would bother her if she didn��t say anything, ultimately causing her more trouble.


    ��And Sir Zion, it��s okay that you don��t have money.��


    ��Thank you.��


    ��But it��s not because I like you immensely. I have enough to be generous.��


    ��I��ll make sure to like you more then.��


    Ise didn��t feel too bad even if Zion liked her money more. She started to understand why. She preferred someone amodating her rather than herself admiring someone else.


    Carynne was still unsettling. She couldn��t understand why. But she was clear about Zion. As long as Ise had money, he would listen to her and love her, or at least, pretend to do so.


    But Ise realized that this was enough for her. Men were meant to be controlled, not admired. What her father provided was not enough. Verdic didn��t understand Ise, and she didn��t understand herself.


    Raymond had been an object of admiration. She might have loved him. But he had always made her ufortable. It was like wearing ill-fitting jewelry or riding a horse that didn��t suit her.


    A good horse doesn��t always listen well. Verdic tried to give her a good man, but Ise realized she needed a man she could control. This realization came after breaking up with Raymond and meeting Zion.


    * * *


    She walked along a river tinged with golden sunset hues. It was more of a stream than a river, but it was perfect for a stroll and enjoying the breeze.


    Carynne enjoyed the wind tousling her hair as she walked slowly. Swans floated on the river, chasing the bits of bread people threw. The capital was indeed better. There were many more peopleing and going, and the variety of buildings and sights was abundant.


    ��What shall we do for dinner?��


    ��Well, how about we eat outter? I don��t particrly like the meals at the temple.��


    ��I see.��


    Carynne watched Ise, who had been fidgeting since earlier, and wondered how long their walk should be.


    ��Did you meet Sir Zion? He was looking for you all day.��


    ����Yes.��


    Of course she did. Carynne had told him where she was. But what was bothering Ise since yesterday? Carynne tilted her head, pondering. She hadn��t seen her yesterday, and the day before yesterday�� This had been going on since they went to the hospital.


    Carynne finally remembered that she had confessed her reincarnation to Ise. She had forgotten about it again.


    Ise must have thought she was crazy at the hospital.


    Carynne smirked as she guessed the reason for Ise��s unease. So that��s why she��s so tense. She must think she��s been living with a crazy person. It��s hard to tell a crazy person that they��re crazy. Raymond had been like that in the past too. So Carynne could immediately recognize Ise��s actions now.


    ��It��s okay. Even if I��m not normal, I won��t trouble you, Ise.��


    Even though it��s so hard to be friends with you, getting this far is something. Carynne thought it was significant progress that Ise had suggested she go to the hospital.


    In the past, Ise wouldn��t have cared if Carynne fell ill while working. If she did care, it was only because she was worried about catching something. For Ise to suggest going to the hospital was indeed touching.


    ��Carynne�� do you have any idea why?��


    ��Well, I��m not sure.��


    Carynne continued walking with Ise, who seemed to have something to say but found it difficult to speak up. Carynne didn��t press her, so they walked in silence for a while.


    As they walked, the golden light turned red and then began to slowly blend into purple. The early evening moonrise was beautiful. Carynne looked at the sky. It was time to go back. If they were toote, the vicar would be furious.


    ��Ise, how about writing a letter to your father?��


    ����Why?��


    ��I recently wrote to my father about various things, and it felt good. Mister Verdic is surely waiting to hear from you too.��


    ��Do you think so?��


    ��Yes.��


    Silence fell again. Carynne stopped walking.


    ��If we stay out toote, the vicar will be angry. Should we head back the way we came?��


    ��Wait. Let��s walk a little more.��


    Ise insisted. Carynne shrugged and continued walking. The breeze was cool, and the mix of crickets chirping, people chatting, and the smell of food being cooked was pleasant.


    Ise��s skirt hem had gotten stained with grass at some point. Carynne noticed but didn��t mention it, as Ise seemed preupied.


    Ise stopped walking, and so did Carynne.


    Ise turned to Carynne and opened her mouth to speak. She had to tell her, no matter how she might take it. The truth needed to be told.


    ��Carynne, you��re����

 Chapter 234

    Chapter 234


    Fief Lord Hare��Edward Dale Hare��was a romantic.


    And there was no other way to describe him except as a romantic.


    He was hopeless at business, repeatedly losing money. In his youth, he was handsome but too shy to make his looks known. Even during the social season, he never went up to the capital, preferring to interact only with his rtives on his estate. The only remarkable thing about him was histe wife, Catherine.


    Catherine was extraordinarily beautiful.


    But if beauty were all she had, she would have quietly faded into obscurity. She was famous because she was the granddaughter of an archduke, the daughter of a count, and had married Fief Lord Hare, passing over many suitors.


    To no exaggeration, those numerous men were no different from her adornments.


    A jewel��s true value lies not just in itself, but in who gifted it. This one from royalty, that one from a duchy, another from a foreign chieftain.


    Among her jewelry, Crown Prince Gueuze was the finest. The next king of this country. The only heir to the throne. Everyone knew he was Catherine��s lover.


    The question was whether he would propose to her or would take her as his mistress.Some people thought she would be the crown princess, and eventually the queen, but the older generation predicted the engagement would break not long after the engagement ceremony, or she would be given the position of ��concubine�� from the very start.


    ��She��ll be a mere mistress.��


    ��No way, he��spletely smitten with her.��


    A count��s daughter and the country��s crown prince. Though she was the granddaughter of an archduke, her father was a count. ording to the country��s system, which followed the father��s rank, she was nobler than most counts but could not possibly marry into royalty.


    ��You don��t know him. Have you ever seen him make a losing move?��


    And as expected, Crown Prince Gueuze married a royal from another country.


    But what no one predicted was that Catherine chose Lord Hare and lived with him for the rest of her life. It was a choice far more foolish than her mother��s. Who could understand her choice of bing the wife of a countryside fief lord over being a lover in the royal pce and among high nobles?


    Even Lord Hare himself could not easilyprehend his wife��s choice.


    He had no wealth. No title.


    ��It is <i>love.��</i>


    That was all there was.


    That ambiguous and uncertain emotion. But even that couldn��t be assured.


    The fief lord knew.


    Catherine certainly did not love him.


    ��It <i>is</i> love.��


    He knew it wasn��t true.


    Catherine never even nced at him. His proposal was merely one among many she had received, a fleeting moment.


    .


    .


    One summer day, he proposed to Catherine.


    Always surrounded by people, Catherine was alone that day. In hindsight, she might have been waiting for someone. But at that moment, he was simply amazed to be alone with her. So, he approached.


    ��The weather is nice.��


    ��Isn��t that usually a greeting for the day, Mr. Hare?��


    ��It��s a lovely evening.��


    ��Yes, a lovely evening indeed, Mr. Hare.��


    Catherine smiled and extended her hand, allowing him to kiss it.


    ��You left the banquet early. Is something wrong?��


    ��I����


    <i>She knows my name.</i> To Hare, it felt like a miracle. <i>She knows me. Surely, she must be interested in me.</i> This realization made his heart swell with joy.


    The breeze was cool, and the scent of flowers was strong. Catherine blinked. As her gaze started to drift away from Hare, he felt the urge to say something to keep her attention. So he did.


    ��Will you marry me?��


    ����What?��


    Hare was shocked to hear the words spill out of his own lips. <i>What did I just say?</i> He closed his eyes tightly. Even if she mocked him or got angry, he had no right to say anything back. It was already a miracle that she knew his name.


    There was no connection between them. She had countless admirers, and he was just one of the many faces in the crowd who barely had the chance to see her from afar.


    Now, that passerby had suddenly confessed to her. How bewildered she must be. His face flushed with embarrassment. When he heard Catherineugh softly, he wanted to jump into the river.


    ��Mr. Hare, you will find someone better.��


    It was a gentle rejection.


    Catherine was not greatly surprised. It was something she was very familiar with. She simply smiled softly and shook her head. Hare covered his flushed face with one hand and bowed his head.


    ��I��m sorry.��


    ��It��s okay.��


    Hare went to a quiet ce and, thinking about what he had just done, banged his head against a pir. Then, a friend approached him.


    ��Are you crazy?��


    ��Did you see?��


    ��I saw. It��s the royal garden, not your backyard��and it��s the social season, so the ce is packed. Are you out of your mind?��


    ��Stop talking. I know already.��


    ��Well, it��s good that you know.��


    The garden, which seemed empty, apparently had people all around.


    ��She��s out of your league.��


    ����I know.��


    Hare knew it too.


    He knew he wasn��t anything special. He knew hecked any qualities that might attract Catherine. Even after she rejected his proposal, he didn��t feel disheartened.


    It was only natural. He felt <i>embarrassed</i>, but the fact that there were others like him was somefort. Sometimes people were so captivated by Catherine��s beauty that they confessed just like he did.


    Forget it.


    Just making that confession would be something he could look back on in his youth.


    Making his first ever proposal to Catherine, of all people, was a bold move. It could even be turned into a tale of bravery. Hare simply decided to forget it.


    Or at least, he tried to forget it.


    * * *


    ��Mr. Hare.��


    That��s why he was even more bewildered when she came back to him.


    ��I will marry you.��


    But Lord Hare could not be happy about her eptance. There wasn��t a hint of joy on Catherine��s face as she spoke. She said it and then immediately turned away. He was left only with questions.


    <i>Why?</i>


    ��This is from Crown Prince Gueuze.��


    And that night, after receiving the message, he understood.


    Ah, so that��s why.


    Crown Prince Gueuze intended to take Catherine as his mistress. And he wanted to use him as a convenient cover. Just as previous kings had done, and other kings from different countries did.


    It was a bit disconcerting, but there was nothing he could do about it.


    A royalmand is a royalmand.


    If he epted the crown prince��s order, his life would flow reasonably peacefully. Like other husbands-in-name-only of royal mistresses, he would receive a title and his estate would prosper in return.


    And if he could even be friends with Catherine, wouldn��t that be enough?


    He would have a good friend.


    Hare epted this.


    * * *


    ����I said I would marry <i>you.��</i>


    ��What?��


    ��Are you the kind of man who shares his wife?��


    Catherine��s eyes were zing blue.


    Hare��s eptance mattered not.


    Catherine��s choice was what mattered.


    ��I don��t need it.��


    Catherine tore the paper with the crown prince��s summons into pieces and threw it into the fire. Hare reached out with a startled expression, but it turned to ash in an instant.


    ��Tell me you love me. Then I will love you.��


    Catherine had made her choice.


    It was Hare��s turn.


    Hare looked down at Catherine, who was extending her hand to him once again.


    If he took her hand, Crown Prince Gueuze would undoubtedly retaliate.


    Hare knew he was a boring man. He didn��t like crowds, was bad at handling money, and found it hard to be interested in anything else. He thought he would quietly breathe in his corner and eventually marry a woman from a simr background who needed to fulfill the duty of marriage as much as he did.


    He imagined his partner could be someone stronger who would guide him, or someone more timid who would share a sense of camaraderie with him. But he had never imagined a woman like Catherine.


    This was undoubtedly dangerous.


    ��Do you love me?��


    For the first time in his life, Hare wanted to take a risk.


    Just like when he proposed in the garden.


    * * *


    Until her death, Catherine was indeed a virtuous wife. She loved her daughter, cared for her husband, managed the estate, and closed her eyes.


    But the name she uttered before she died was not his.


    He undoubtedly loved Catherine.


    Even if she had never loved him until the end.


    * * *


    Some people suggested he remarry for Carynne��s sake. Because of the inheritancew favoring men, having no male siblings was disadvantageous for Carynne. If the fief lord died, the title would pass not to Carynne, but to Dun, a distant rtive but nheless the next closest male rtive.


    If Dun didn��t marry Carynne, she would have to marry into another family with very little wealth. If she had a male sibling, he might have given his sister a home, but with Dun being a distant rtive, he would likely just drive her out.


    Although Hare had arranged Dun and Carynne��s engagement, it was clear to everyone that their rtionship was not good. So people kept advising him to remarry. To have a second child and secure a stable future for his daughter.


    But the lord did not remarry.


    That��s why people called him a romantic. They said it was because he couldn��t forget his dead wife.


    It was true.


    And it meant his love was more precious to him than his daughter��s future.


    His love was his eternal and only glory. Even if it was a love that was already long dead.


    He didn��t want to give up his love. So he didn��t remarry. And he didn��t hesitate to medicate and brainwash his daughter.


    But despite that, he genuinely wished for his daughter��s happiness.


    It just was not more important than his wife or his love.


    .


    .


    ��Miss Carynne sent a gift along with a letter.��


    Helen, the housekeeper, gave him a letter from Carynne, which detailed her recent activities.


    It also mentioned Ise Evans, with whom she was currently living under the same roof.


    The letter exined that Carynne was staying in the capital, helping Ise after assisting her in running away. Naturally, business matters were indefinitely postponed, and Carynne was handling various matters in ce of Ise, who was avoiding contact with her father.


    ��And the Miss sent a gift as well. Would you like to see it?��


    ��Yes�� What is it?��


    ��It��s a music box.��


    It was something that young girls would like.


    It wasn��t a suitable item for a middle-aged fief lord, but he liked it. The music box featured a pair of figures dancing. When wound up, the melody yed, and the figures began to move.


    The pair of lovers continued to dance.


    The hair colors of the figures resembled his and histe wife��s. The lord kept winding and watching the music box.


    Hare acknowledged that he didn��t know his daughter well. He admitted it to himself.


    He tried to believe in Catherine, who spoke of living and dying repeatedly, and he tried to believe in his daughter as well, but there was still a corner of his heart filled with unease.


    <b>[ There is a man with whom I am in love. I shall introduce him to you soon. ]</b>


    He touched his daughter��s handwriting with his fingertips.


    It finally felt like his work was done.


    Now, he could remain immersed in his own love.


    Waking up in the morning with a sigh of loss, managing the estate, attending the temple out of duty, and visiting the grave of the deceased. It would indeed be a peaceful and satisfying routine for the rest of his life.


    He had done all he needed to do.


    .


    .


    ��It��s fortunate, isn��t it?��


    ��Y-Yes, my lord.��

 Chapter 235 | His Story II

    Chapter 235 | His Story II


    Three days of ash for atonement.


    Four days of water for prosperity.


    The first day is the day of atonement.


    The second day is the day of reparation.


    The third day is the day of absolution.


    The sin of the subconscious. The sin of the vulnerable. The sin of ignorance. These were all what needed to be atoned for, but the scale of the ritual varied depending on one��s ie and status.


    Those who have coveted their neighbor��s belongings, those who have defiled their offerings, those who have made false oaths��they must confess their sins, pay back the damages tenfold, offer blood sacrifices during the ancestral rites on the day of ash. This was in ordance with the divinew, which was separate from each domain��s governingw.


    * * *


    Blood flows during the festival.This is amonality not just in this country but also in thends beyond the White Mountain Range. With only a single mountain range separating them and no vast seas or deserts topletely iste them, races,nguages, and religions are bound to be simr.


    Religions have splintered into different sects, each calling the others heretics, but they share the same name for their god and very simr sacrificial methods.


    Themonality of religions in this world.


    Every nation offers many sacrifices.


    Sacrifices that involve bloodshed.


    Ewes, cows, and mares. These animals be food for the people after the sacrifices. The sacrifices have turned into festivals, but their essence is to atone for the people��s sins. To atone for the myriad sins of humanity, livestock are ughtered, shedding their blood. Especially when a new king ascends the throne or there is a great victory in war, the blood flows like a river.


    A thousand years ago, it was human blood that was shed.


    It is a very old story. So old that the original records are hard to find.


    In ancient times, people sinned.


    Under onenguage, one culture, and one god, people advanced rapidly and became corrupt. They enved each other, began to consume each other as food, and harbored deep hatred.


    Humanity��s sins were so profound that an enraged god decided to destroy the world.


    Earthquakes erupted, tsunamis engulfed thend, and gues spread. People went mad, endless droughts continued, and prophets foretold the end of humanity.


    ��God shall not forgive humankind now.��


    Terrified, people sought a way out. Hoping their god had notpletely forsaken them, they turned to mages and priests, crying out for help. They began to revive the forgotten sacrifices, praying to their god. They burned their most cherished possessions.


    But it was not enough.


    ��Find and offer what will satisfy God the most.��


    People pondered what this could be and eventually began offering the righteous to their god.


    ��We offer the righteous here. Please forgive our sins.��


    But God was not satisfied with the righteous.


    The righteous who met the god��s standards were too few.


    So the people began to sacrifice children.


    ��We offer these innocent children, please forgive our sins.��


    But God was not satisfied with the children. Those who knew nothing had umted nothing and were therefore insufficient.


    The people despaired. Their sacrifices, the righteous, and the children were all inadequate for their god. The number of people dwindled as they killed each other for sacrifices.


    ��Are you going to let us perish like this?��


    The people gathered and prayed day and night for a hundred days, wailing and weeping. Moved by their tears and cries, their god pointed them to one particr woman.


    ��Here is a woman who is innocent yet not ignorant.��


    And thus, destruction ceased.


    * * *


    <i>Kiiiiek!</i>


    Even rabbits scream. Animals that seem docile make unimaginable sounds in the face of death. Every time he heard such noises, Dun had to stop himself several times. Sometimes it bothered him so much that he couldn��t sleep.


    But that was only the first few times. As the number of animals he killed became uncountable, he got used to it. It was something he had to get used to since this was his lifelong duty.


    The process of ughter begins with subjugation. Knock them out with a hammer blow to the head. Some animals die from this, but life is tougher than one might expect, and most only get stunned.


    When dealing with sheep or cows, knocking them out was quite the task. Dun managed to seed with rabbits andmbs but not yet with cows. It would take more time to perfect his skill.


    ��������


    It became quiet. Then the bloodletting followed. Initially, he tried to slit the throat, but blood sttered everywhere, making a mess. Clean decapitation is reserved for convicts.


    As the blood drained, the convulsions subsided. Though using drugs would be easier, it was forbidden to use drugs on sacrificial animals. Additionally, all these steps had to be performed by a priest, not a butcher.


    ��Damn it.��


    Dun swallowed a groan. It seemed the rabbit had opened its eyes during the skinning process.


    And so, again��<i> thud!</i> If it moved again, then <i>thud!</i> once more.


    Dun looked down at the convulsing animal under the hammer. This time it was definitely dead. But he had struck too hard, making it a grisly sight. He grimaced and switched to a smaller, sharper knife for the next step.


    Normally, his task would end after draining its blood, but Dun took on all the subsequent tasks himself.


    He didn��t want to waste the flesh. He wanted to use the carcass more efficiently. While sacrificial animals are burned whole, including their innards and fur, there was no need to do that with practice animals. It would be a waste of flesh.


    After draining the blood, he skinned the animal. Since he wasn��t burning it, he could skin it more cleanly. Next, he removed and discarded the innards. The innards were boiled and fed to the hunting dogs. The remaining meat was split in half vertically and washed with water.


    And then it was time to cook.


    Only after mixing the meat with spices and medicine could Dun wash the blood from his face.


    At first, it made him nauseous.


    The smell of blood and the sight of the gruesome innards were enough to make him vomit, and his hands trembled. The animals in front of him kept moving or screaming, showing their resistance to the approaching death with their whole bodies.


    .


    .


    ��I��m not eating that.��


    The meat he offered to Carynne was covered in so many spices that its original form was unrecognizable. Seeing her push away the meal he had painstakingly prepared, Dun frowned.


    ����Show somepassion for the animals. They died for you.��


    ��Why don��t <i>you</i> eat it? Oh, right, you can��t because of the drugs?��


    ��Hmm.��


    He would need to work harder to mask the taste of the medicine.


    Carynne looked down at the dish and then red at Dun.


    ��Every time I eat the food you bring, my head feels foggy.��


    ��Good grief.��


    His young god did not seem pleased with the offering. Dun picked up the meal he had carefully prepared. If he left it now, Carynne would throw it in the trash. In the end, Dun gave up on the offering. Since his god did not ept his devotion, there was nothing more he could do.


    ��Well, then I suppose you��ll have to starve.��


    ��I��ll eat as long as it doesn��t have any medicine in it.��


    ����We��ll see.��


    ��I��m not eating anything <i>you</i> give me! Bring me something with nothing in it!��


    <i>But you��ll soon forget this, too.</i>


    Dun looked down at the furious Carynne and muttered to himself. And the next day, when Carynne didn��t remember refusing the meal, she silently shoved the same food into her mouth.


    The time she spent raging didn��tst long. Her periods of memory were bing shorter, and as Nancy whispered, Carynne began to feel increasingly distant from herself and others. She acted formally when seeing the lord and felt ufortable with the maids�� service.


    Soon, she would forget everything.


    ��Mydy believes shees from a better world.��


    Nancy told Dun.


    ��A paradise-like ce. People help each other, families are perfect, and there are plenty of friends. In that ce, status and rank don��t matter, and people live ording to their abilities. No one goes hungry no matter how ipetent they are. Does that sound right?��


    As if a deity had descended into the human world.


    Dun didn��t find Nancy entirely trustworthy, but that much was enough. Carynne would increasingly distinguish herself from the world and live blindly for one single value.


    That was what Catherine had wanted.


    For her daughter to find a more <i>perfect</i> love.

 Chapter 236

    Chapter 236


    Carynne lives again.


    Just like Catherine.


    After Dun swore to assist the weeping Catherine, she taught him many things. From history and theology to cooking. Catherine never mentioned how many years she had lived, but it was clear she had lived much longer than she appeared.


    And so had her mother. And her mother��s mother. They had enjoyed far more time than others, umting vast knowledge and sharing it with their descendants. The stories Catherine told were rted to her history and the stories of saintly sacrifices. These were stories not found in history books, but theology as recounted by the sacrificial victims themselves.


    But those memories would no longer be passed down. Carynne��s memories would bepletely erased. And she would be isted from the world.


    That is what Catherine wanted. She loathed the fate imposed upon her.


    ��These stories are no longer necessary. Carynne is not livestock��she is to find love. Not to bear children�� but to choose true love only.��


    Dun thought of the animals he had killed as he looked at Catherine. She had eyes like those of a cow. It wasn��t just the eyes. Their essence was no different from that of cows or sheep.


    They were wless sacrifices given to humanity by the gods. Their personalities were mere essories. What mattered was their perpetuity, their repeated deaths.She reviled it.


    Catherine loathed her recurring fate. God had bound them in a cycle of repeated deaths. The only way to escape this cycle was to give life to the next generation of sacrifices.


    <i>I am not livestock.</i>


    But what could she do? Without bearing children, she couldn��t escape the cycle. Catherine didn��t know a way topletely break free from the cycle. But at the very least, she wanted to prevent Carynne from bearing children as a means to her freedom. She wanted her to love wholly.


    <i>Knock, knock.</i>


    ����Yes.��


    There was a knock on the door. When Dun answered, the person he expected appeared.


    Carynne��s mother, Catherine.


    ��You��re working hard. Isn��t it too difficult?��


    ��W-What brings you here?��


    It was a space too filled with the stench of blood for Catherine, the wife of the lord, to enter. Dun put down his knife, removed his gloves, and stood up to wash his hands. But as he tried to leave, Catherine blocked him.


    ��It won��t take long.��


    ��B-But the smell����


    ��It��s a story that would be troublesome if others heard.��


    Dun closed the door again. He looked into her eyes.


    ��I am going to die soon.��


    Her tone was light, as if she were talking about going for a walk tomorrow. Dun was taken aback, but as Catherine continued, he couldn��t even find time to express his shock.


    ��Most things I will put in my will, but I find it inappropriate to write about Carynne in there. So, I wanted to tell you directly.��


    ����I-I suppose so.��


    ��There��s no need for you to cook anymore. Carynne is growing suspicious because you��re too skilled. Anyway, you��ll be leaving for the abbey soon, so just tell Nancy the medicine��s recipe.��


    ����The m-meals will taste worse.��


    ��It can��t be helped. Even when she has forgotten everything, she still sometimes refuses meals with your medicine.��


    ��Even without memories����


    ��Even without memories, decisions made repeatedly are hard to change.��


    Catherine pushed her hair back, revealing a glimpse of what Carynne would look like in a few years. Through her dark red eyshes, her striking eyes looked at Dun. Those eyes were the color one might see at twilight on a summer day. He saw his reflection in those eyes. Catherine closed her mouth and then spoke again.


    ��When are you leaving?��


    ��In a f-few days.��


    ����Yes. I see.��


    Silence once again filled the room. But it was a silence that indicated preparation for speaking, not the absence of something to say.


    Dun waited for her to continue. Suddenly, the smell of blood felt nauseating.


    He found it hard to understand. Catherine was healthy. There was nothing wrong with her body. Why was she talking about dying?


    ��Is s-something wrong with your body?��


    He couldn��t help but wonder, seeing her rosy cheeks. She didn��t look sick at all. Catherine shook her head.


    ��No, but there will be.��


    ��It��s not rted to an illness?��


    ��That��s right.��


    Her words were almost a confirmation. Dun knew about her unique situation. She had died ande back to life repeatedly. And he remembered that Catherine��s mother and her predecessors did not live long either. Although Catherine didn��t borate, none of them lived very long.


    Somemitted suicide, others fell ill, and some were caught up in wars. The reasons for their deaths varied, but none of them lived long. At least, none of the ancestors Catherine knew or were recorded had lived long. Was it not a coincidence? Was there something that controlled life beyond the period of its repetition? Dun cautiously asked.


    ��Is it rted to Carynne?��


    ��To some extent.��


    ��Will C-Carynne end up the same way?��


    Catherine smiled slightly at Dun��s question.


    ��I know what you��re thinking. It��s not that�� it��s not about blood lineage.��


    Her face took on a slightly pained expression as she continued.


    ��Crown Prince Gueuze sent another letter. I have to protect my family.��


    ��But I don��t think ending your life is a good solution.��


    ��You don��t know him. I do. If I die, Crown Prince Gueuze will lose interest in my family. That��s the kind of person he is,�� Catherine exined.


    Power-hungry individuals obsess over what they can��t have. For Crown Prince Gueuze, that was Catherine. She thought she had escaped him, but marriage was too fragile a refuge.


    Dun overheard the fief lord confiding in the butler about his worries.


    The estate��s taxes were higher than ever. The sudden increase in taxes left them short on money, to the extent that they had to borrow money now. Eventually, the lord had to borrow from the notorious moneylender, Verdic Evans.


    Dun being designated as the next lord wasn��t just because he was a close rtive. All other rtives had already refused to inherit the estate. The jewelry Catherine had given Dun was enough for his parents to live on and pay for his education, but the estate itself was bing increasingly worthless. It was a debt-ridden estate.


    Catherine said that if she died, Crown Prince Gueuze would lose interest in the Hare estate.


    ��If I die, my story ends. Carynne will live�� and that��s enough. Isn��t it like a fairy tale? The main character often grows up without a mother. The parents exit the stage. This is the end for me.��


    ��������


    ��My absence will be more beneficial to Carynne. What if I get weak-hearted and tell Carynne the answer? That��s why I need to die now.��


    Catherine smiled.


    ��Carynne will truly live her own life. Lord Hare will provide her protection at least. After all, he is�� a parent.��


    But as Dun looked at her face, he couldn��t shake a feeling of unease. Listening to Catherine, it didn��t seem like she was talking about dying to protect her family. While listing the reasons for her death, she seemed more relieved than anything.


    She didn��t look worried about Carynne��she looked pleased. Even as she spoke to Dun, she seemed to be suppressing her expressions at times. It was the face of someone who wanted to say something but couldn��t.

 Chapter 237

    Chapter 237


    ����I-If you have something more h-honest about it.��


    Dun made the sign of the cross and looked at Catherine. It was a gesture indicating he would not mention this as a servant of God. Though he was still a young priest not yet fully ordained, his gesture was skillful. Dun swore to God and asked Catherine.


    ��Are you telling the truth?��


    <i>Are you truly saying you will die to protect Carynne?</i>


    Dun looked up at Catherine. Their eyes met. Catherine hesitated for a long moment before speaking.


    ��The truth is�� I��m <i>tired.��</i>


    Catherine clenched her fists. Her face showed signs of fatigue. Looking at Dun, Catherine confessed her true feelings.


    ��I��m really tired of living. This much is enough. I don��t want to see the end. I don��t even care if Carynne seeds or not. Now I understand why my mothermitted suicide. I��ve prepared this much for my daughter, so I��ve done enough. Haven��t I?��


    Her eyes seemed to ask Dun if it was alright for her to die now. They were not eyes seeking the truth, but rather, eyes seeking agreement.��As a priest�� I cannot rmend s-suicide.��


    ��I can kill myself just fine enough without your help.��


    ��You will fall into h-hell.��


    ��That��s a funny joke. How many times do you think I��ve died so far?��


    Dun paused and then replied.


    ����I was saying it out of formality.��


    ��I see.��


    Catherineughed.


    ��That��s why I like you.��


    * * *


    In just a few days, Catherine��s illness became apparent. She was not omniscient, but she was well-versed in the methods of suicide. One such method involved using poison.


    Catherine prepared and ingested the poison herself. She pretended to be examined by Dun, but in reality, during their meetings, she was taking the poison. When he was not around, she did it alone. Her physician would be baffled by the unknown cause, but it was inevitable.


    ��To be h-honest�� it would just be better f-for you to go peacefully than painfully����


    ��But I don��t want that.��


    Catherine��s refusal was curt.


    Dun couldn��t understand. He could ept that she wanted to end her life because she was tired of repeated deaths.


    But why choose to die painfully?


    ��Dun, do you know the mindset of someone who does self-harm?��


    ��������


    ��They want to control their time of death. By poisoning myself�� I feel a sense of relief knowing I am managing my death. This is good not just for me, but for others as well. I need time to face my slowly approaching death, and my family and friends need time to say goodbye to me.��


    ��T-Thinking of others like that�� wouldn��t it be better to live longer?��


    ��That��s too much of a bother.��


    Catherine smirked.


    * * *


    Catherine looked up at Dun nkly. Her cheeks were sunken, and dark circles under her eyes had erased her original beauty. This was just the beginning. She would continue to weaken and then die. This was suicide.


    Her rough and raspy voice continued.


    ��What are we?��


    Is it a life to continuously bear children? Living in halted time makes you think strange thoughts. My mother did, and so did my grandmother. We are livestock offered to God, just living like this.


    Long ago, priests said we were endlessly blessed. That we could enjoy near-immortality if we knew the future and desired it. They said because we atoned for people��s sins through our deaths, paradise was promised to us.


    No one lives a repeated life without sinning. No one. Is everything resolved just because we��ve died? If time isn��t ovepping, does it mean nothing ever happened?


    Compared to other women, I might indeed be lucky. All women are expected to marry, bear, and raise children. It��s hard to have a career, inherit wealth, or even leave a name behind.


    But should we consider it a blessing to live a life where we bear children, die, and that��s the end of it? After all, for anyone, the goal of life inevitably bes having children�� It feels strangely miserable.


    If you��re royalty, you might take saving the country as your life��s mission.


    If you��re a man, you might aim for a career.


    But for us, whose only goal is to have children and reach death, we can only find value in love.


    So, at least, I wanted to die having loved.


    And I did my best yet failed.


    But my daughter will seed.


    ��So help me. Help ensure that Carynne doesn��t curse my choice�� Truly�� If she can find a man who makes her think she��s happy�� then let her conceive at that time.


    * * *


    The funeral was held simply.


    It was a lonely funeral, unlike what one would expect for someone who had once been surrounded by royalty and nobility. Because Catherine had died of an illness, only a minimal number of people attended. At that time, there was a gue spreading nationwide, so people were afraid to leave their viges.


    Since Dun had not yet been fully ordained, he observed the funeral as an assistant priest. However, he questioned the phrase ��the departed shall ascend to heaven�� in the eulogy.


    Would she really go to heaven?


    .


    .


    That day, Dun decided to be a heretic for his own god.


    * * *


    ��The youngdy cried herself to sleep.��


    ��How��s her memory?��


    ��She can hardly remember anything now�� But when I mentioned that it��s been a few years since Lady Catherine passed away, she suddenly copsed.��


    How long has it been since Dunst saw her? He tried to avoid seeing her as much as possible, and he nned to meet the fief lord and leave quickly.


    Yet, he encountered Carynne. By now, Carynne had reached puberty and grown into ady. He��s been told that her memory was bing more and more unreliable.


    The n was progressing steadily.


    Carynne��s instances of recalling memories were bing increasingly rare, and she often found familiar people to be strangers. Nancy said Carynne was starting to behave more like a fairy tale princess. A little more gentle, a little more kind.


    ��How ironic.��


    When she was young, Carynne was never known for her good temperament, even in jest. Dun remembered the times when Carynne threw tantrums. And he remembered when she locked him up and set the dogs on him.


    Dun opened the door and looked down at the sleeping Carynne. Her eyes were swollen, and her chest rose and fell slowly, indicating she was deeply asleep.


    She had grown enough to be called a ��woman�� now. Soon, she would be a stunning beauty who could turn heads. And among the many people she would meet, if she found a decent man�� she would reach death.


    ����Carynne.��


    ��������


    ��Carynne�� Hare.��


    He called her name, but she didn��t wake up. He felt relieved.


    No matter how much he thought about it, he couldn��t bring himself to ept it. Why should she die? Why must time pass? Under his hand, someone could enjoy eternal life.


    Carynne had the chance to live forever. Catherine had dismissed it as a cruel joke, but Dun saw it as a true blessing. This beauty could be preserved forever.


    Catherine��s face was wretched.


    The face of someone dying, worn out by life, is dreadful. It��s even more dreadful to think of Carynne living a normal life, finding a man, conceiving a child, and dying just like everyone else.


    Here lies eternity. The vast knowledge and history that Catherine had imparted to him were immense and profound.


    Why must eternity be forsaken?


    Why must people die?


    Catherine died.


    But Carynne will not.


    Eternally.


    Dun knelt down and prayed about the task he would undertake.


    And he confessed to himself that he had be a heretic.


    This girl sleeping before him is his god.

 Chapter 238

    Chapter 238


    ��Reverend. Reverend Dun.��


    He heard someone calling him. Dun realized he had fallen asleep while sitting. He opened his eyes and saw Borwen, who worked at the mansion, entering.


    ��I��m sorry. If you were sleeping, I cane backter.��


    ��N-No�� It��s fine.��


    Borwen used to be a butcher. Compared to the number of animals he had butchered, it was only very asionally that he butchered people as well.


    His mother still had to take Dun��s medicine to stay alive. Borwen tried to correct his behavior as much as possible, but even while quietly running errands for Dun, he sometimes used coarsenguage. It was not wise to show any disarray in front of him.


    Dun stood up and looked at Borwen.


    ��Miss Carynne has sent a letter. She says she is currently in the capital with Miss Ise Evans. His Lordship would like to have tea with you. Will you join him?��


    ����Yes.����Yes, very well. I will let him know you will be joining shortly. And before you go, it would be best to change your clothes. New clothes are in the wardrobe.��


    ��A-Alright.��


    Dun rubbed his rough, dry cheeks to clear his mind. It had been two days since he arrived at the estate, yet he still felt disoriented. He opened his eyes and looked in the mirror. A gaunt, stooped young man stared back at him.


    There stood a patient, captivated by eternity.


    .


    .


    There was only one thing he wondered.


    ��Of all people�� Why me?��


    * * *


    ��I heard there was a fire at the abbey. Are you alright?��


    ��I��m f-fine, Your Lordship.��


    Dun looked down at the tea before him, then raised his head to answer the fief lord. Even if Carynne rejected Dun, it didn��t change the fact that he was to be the next lord of thisnd. His return had only been slightly dyed.


    But in the meantime, various things had happened to him. From small incidents like objects disappearing and reappearing, to suddenly feeling sleepy, and almost causing a fire by falling over.


    ��It��s all over now.��


    Dun no longer had business at the abbey. He sipped his tea as he listened to the fief lord talk about Carynne��s departure to the capital.


    The fief lord cautiously spoke as he watched out for Dun��s reaction.


    ��I��m told that there��s a man she will be introducing to me soon.��


    ��I-I-Is that so.��


    ��Yes�� It may not be to your liking, but I hope you will still give your congrattions.��


    Dun understood why the fief lord was speaking so cautiously. Was he worried that Dun might think he was losing Carynne? Dun bitterlyughed to himself. The fief lord and Catherine were gravely mistaken.


    They were the ones who proposed the deal, so why were they afraid to carry it out? They found it hard to ept the process. They couldn��t treat Carynnefortably and assumed Dun harbored ulterior motives. Even now, the fief lord was watching him so warily just because Carynne had chosen some other man.


    But why would he be angry about that?


    ��Of course.��


    It was something to celebrate.


    Whether Carynne met someone or not, it was a blessing.


    Because what he had to do remained unchanged.


    Because what he <i>had been doing</i> remained unchanged.


    ��So, how about we pretend the conversations with Catherine never happened?��


    ��I don��t quite understand what you mean.��


    ��I mean, stop tampering with her memory�� Catherine, she����


    The fief lord��s face reddened slightly. His purpose in calling Dun was to discuss this matter.


    ��I lost my wife, but I��ve also lost my daughter over the years. I don��t want to lose the only family I have left.��


    Dun rested his chin on his hand and pondered.


    The fief lord��s words were meant to persuade Dun, but they only served to strengthen his resolve. Carynne herself had said she would live again. She told this to her father.


    .


    .


    Dun tossed a gold coin into the air and caught it again. <i>Clink. Clink.</i> The coin repeatedly rose and fell in the air. Dun thought. He had to think.


    Will Carynne live again? Dun believed she would. But the fact that she had regained her memory and yet held nothing in her hand confused him. Carynne should have been holding something. Hadn��t Catherine mentioned it?


    ��To be sure I will live again, firstes memory, then I can return with a mark.��


    Catherine had once told Dun.


    ��Whenever I die, I can start with what I held in my hand in the previous life. Something small enough to fit tightly in your palm�� In my case, at first, it was a finger.��


    A finger? Dun looked at Catherine��s white, slender fingers. She lifted her hand and bent one finger. <i>My finger. I cut it off and brought it back. It��s decayed now, so I discarded it.</i>


    ��Do you know? Human fingers have patterns.��


    Was she talking about the ridges on the skin of the fingertips? Dun looked at his fingertips, but they were smooth from all the medicine he��d concocted. Later, he learned, just as Catherine had said, that everyone has unique patterns that can be used to identify individuals.


    ��Is it because pregnancy is the answer? If you hold a part of your body, youe back. If it��s not part of your body, the most distinct thing that remains is this.��


    Catherine picked up a gold coin.


    ��This stays without much resistance. Other things tend to cause problems.��


    ��I see.��


    ��So,ter, to check if Carynne has lived and died again, you just need to see if she��s holding something like this.��


    ��What if she dies without holding anything?��


    Catherine poked Dun.


    ��Then you can ce it in her hand.��


    ��������


    ��Even right after she dies. As long as someone puts a gold coin in her hand after she dies��.��


    * * *


    <i>That is why you must be a priest.</i>


    <i>You must be the guide to her death.</i>


    * * *


    Carynne wasn��t holding anything.


    Could it be because this was her first life?


    At first, Dun thought so. But the fief lord��s request to leave Carynne alone made Dun suspicious.


    Carynne herself had persuaded the fief lord to let her leave the manor. And in the process, she mentioned she had lived several times.


    So, why wasn��t she holding anything?


    Dun couldn��t understand why he hadn��t ced a gold coin in her hand in the past. If Carynne had died, she would surely have been holding a coin. But this time, there was nothing in her hand.


    Dun felt a growing itch in his mind. He wanted to take his brain out and organize it.


    Carynne imed to remember. Yet, there was no coin.


    <i>The coin.</i>


    Dun thought about the object he had repeatedly considered.


    Carynne was no longer at the mansion.


    Could someone who had spent their entire life at the mansion, with unreliable memories, really exhibit such decisiveness? She hadn��t been gone long.


    Nancy, who had been taking care of her, had reportedly run away with the money. There should have been a strong bond between Carynne and Nancy. At the very least, Carynne should have been influenced by Nancy, having taken the medicine and been cared for by her. Yet, Carynne did not return home even after Nancy fled.


    Strange. So strange.


    Could a person really act that way? Was Carynne indeed living again? And she��s already dating a man who she��s ready to introduce to her father?


    Dun clenched the coin tightly.


    Carynne��s actions were not those of someone who had lived only one life. She did not seem like someone who had been virtually imprisoned in the mansion her entire life. Her decisiveness and resourcefulness were clear.


    Dun twisted his lips into a smile.


    He also realized why his final days at the abbey had been dangerous. He now understood why things had gone missing. Carynne had ordered someone to do it. She had undoubtedly been trying to find something out from him.


    This was not Carynne��s first life.


    She had likely extracted some truth from him to some extent.


    The past versions of himself had seeded.


    But no matter how much Carynne struggled, he had no intention of letting her go.


    Dun could feel the past versions of himself whispering from beside him.


    <i>Eternity.</i>


    Trying to escape?


    From eternity to death? To eternal rest?


    But she would not seed.


    No matter who it was that she chose.


    Dun stood up and began to shove items into his bag. It didn��t matter who the man was, what kind of person he was, or anything else. It didn��t matter.


    Dun��s actions would remain unchanged.


    <b>�� End of Volume 5 ��</b>

 Chapter 239 | This is not the end

    Chapter 239 | This is not the end


    Ise opened her eyes in the dark. She panicked. She wasn��t in her bed. She felt a hard floor beneath her. Where was she? Did she fall out of bed?


    No, her room had a wooden floor. This was stone. Ise hurriedly sat up. Her head was spinning.


    ��H-Huh��?��


    It was dark. Ise rubbed her eyes. But she couldn��t see anything clearly.


    Why? Her room hadrge windows. It couldn��t be this dark. She groped around hastily. She touched something.


    ��AHHH!��


    It was a human hand. Ise screamed in terror. But the hand covered her mouth. Terrified, Ise scratched at the hand with her nails. The person behind her groaned in pain.


    ����Ugh, Ise�� stay still.��


    It was a familiar voice. But Ise couldn��t calm down and struggled.��Ise, calm down.��


    The other person calmly pressed down with strength, and gradually, Ise��s strength waned, and she came to her senses. Even in the pitch darkness, the voice was clear. Soft yet firm. Before her eyes adjusted to the darkness, she knew who it was.


    ��It��s okay. It will be okay if you calm down. Alright? I��ll let go if you calm down.��


    Ise nodded. The hand covering her mouth slowly withdrew.


    ��Carynne? Where are we? Is this the Grand Cathedral? Why is it so dark?��


    Please, let it be. Ise voiced her hope. But Carynne immediately denied it.


    ��No, it��s not there. This is�� a ce we shouldn��t be in. I��ve been here before.��


    ��Where is this?��


    Carynne moved away from Ise. The sound of footsteps could be heard. Ise asked Carynne again, who was moving away.


    ��Where are we?!��


    ��Ise, I think it��s better to turn on the light, but promise me you won��t scream. And don��t ask about where we are. It��s better that way.��


    ��Tell me where we are!��


    ��It��s better if you don��t know.��


    Ise screamed in a fit, but Carynne didn��t answer.


    ��Where the hell are we? Why are we here? I was definitely����


    Where is this ce? It��spletely unfamiliar. The floor is cold and mmy. There��s not a single window, but it��s not a small ce. Ise groped the floor, trying to recall.


    <i>Where was thest ce I was at? Where am I now?</i> Her head spun. Ise held her head. Something was trickling down from her head, bothering her in the darkness.


    <i>����Hiiiek.��</i>


    Her head was wet and sticky. At first, it seemed like sweat. She hoped it was water, but it didn��t seem so. As she realized this, her scalp began to sting. Her arms and legs hurt. Pain was rising from all over her body.


    Why?


    Ise began to search her memory.


    * * *


    ��Shh, Ise.��


    Carynne raised a finger to her lips and locked eyes with Ise. Ise started to speak but stopped. Carynne seemed to be looking at something behind her. Her whole body was tense.


    Ise tried to talk to Carynne but stopped. The breeze was still gentle and the sound of water was quiet, but suddenly the atmosphere had be grave. Why was that, even though she hadn��t said anything yet? Ise was confused by Carynne��s sudden change in demeanor.


    ��Why����


    ��Just turn around quietly. Slowly. It��s okay, just move slowly����


    Her face was stiff. Ise didn��t understand. But Carynne��s firm attitude silenced her. Ise nced around.


    It was already getting dark. There was a faint smell of blood and a foul odor in the air. Ise grimaced. She couldn��t recognize this ce. They had walked too far along the cloth path. Ise was about to move when she saw something.


    Ise held her breath.


    ����Eek����


    There were people. They were allrge, young, and middle-aged men.


    Their clothes were shabby and their beards were unkempt, men of a status that Ise would hardly ever meet. They were cursing.


    ��Ugh.��


    ��Hurry.��


    Carynne must have seen them and decided to turn back. Ise hurriedly tried to turn back.


    <i>Ssh��</i>


    They grabbed something and threw it into the stream. There was a sshing sound as they threw it. They were dumping something. The foul smell seemed toe from there.


    Ise saw one of them yfully lifting and moving an arm. An arm? A human arm. Already severed from the body.


    ��Those men are disposing of a corpse.��


    They hade too far down. And there was no one around but them.


    When Ise couldn��t move, Carynne gently pushed her and whispered.


    ��Slowly�� we need to get out. Quietly.��


    Carynne moved slowly behind Ise.


    Ise couldn��t even scream and turned around. She had to get out of here, just as Carynne said. Immediately.


    Ise slowly took a step. She had to move.


    But then, maybe the grass rustled, or a footstep was heard. Rough shouts from the men reached them.


    ��Hey, over there! Damn it!��


    ��Catch them!��


    ��There are two women! Catch them now!��


    ��Don��t let them get away!��


    Damn, Carynne clicked her tongue. Carynne pushed Ise��s back.


    ��Run!��


    Ise ran frantically. The sound of their shoes echoed loudly. Ise ran with all her might for the first time in her life. But her clothes were too heavy, and her heels were too high. And there were too many men.


    ��No, no�� We��re going to get caught.��


    ��Damn, this is such a hassle.��


    ��At least it��s convenient. Thanks to this, we have less work. Should we use these women?��


    ��That would be best.��


    Ise hadn��t taken many steps before her hair was yanked violently.


    And that was the end.


    * * *


    They were taking a walk together. Ise, worried about Carynne��s condition, had gone for a check-up at the hospital and had been restless ever since.


    Seeing this, Carynne thought that perhaps the hospital had dered her insane or conducted some other tests.


    Dun had been giving her medication since childhood, so maybe the results of those drugs were showing up now. Whatever the result, it made sense. Whether it was her mind or body, something could be abnormal.


    Carynne was ready to ept any bad result, so she was at ease. Because of this, she found Ise��s restlessness somewhat endearing.


    ��C-Carynne�� I have something to tell you during our walk.��


    When Ise asked Carynne to go out with her, Carynne willingly apanied her. They walked slowly along the riverside, waiting for Ise to speak.


    <i>Could we possibly say that we��ve be something like friends?</i>


    Carynne thought this and apuded her own efforts. It felt as satisfying as murder. When she sessfully killed Nancy, she felt this proud, too. Indeed, attempting something that seemed impossible and seeding was very rewarding.


    The moment she was ready to listen to Ise��s words with a light heart, they ruined it.


    ��Damn it����


    When they left, the sun was still out, and the riverside park was filled with people taking walks. It seemed far from any danger. But as they wandered aimlessly, they had unintentionally walked too far.


    At the moment when Ise was about to speak, Carynne saw men disposing of a corpse in the river. Witnessing this scene, Carynne didn��t think about the danger first but rather about how she had just managed to get this close to Ise.


    Carynne was caught first, her mouth covered by the men, and she thought about the end of this life. Having seen them disposing of a corpse, they wouldn��t leave her alive. In the past, Carynne would have been confident that she wouldn��t die no matter what happened during this time of year, always managing tost a full year before dying. But now, it was different. She could die at any moment.


    Regrettably, it seemed this life was going to end like this.

 Chapter 240

    Chapter 240


    Raymond might already be searching for her, and if he couldn��t find her, he would probablymit suicide to follow her. Carynne thought about this absentmindedly and realized it was actually a good method. She decided to advise Raymond not to wait next time and justmit suicide. Waiting too long had made him cry too much.


    Thinking of Raymond, Carynne slowly closed her eyes.


    ��But when I opened my eyes, I found myself here����


    Carynne felt the walls of the room with her hands, trying to figure out the location.


    It seemed like she had been here before. As she felt along the walls, she slowly found the spot where thentern had been hung before. With a tter, she found the extinguishedntern.


    Fortunately, there was a matchbox right next to thentern. After several attempts in the darkness, Carynne finally managed to light a match.


    ��Where are we!��


    ����Ise, I��ll say it again�� Promise me you won��t scream.��


    ��Where exactly are we?��Where, indeed.


    The owner of this ce was obvious. The person who held the real power in this country.


    ��Haa.��


    Carynne sighed as she lit thentern. The small me illuminated the area. Ise stumbled toward the light. Her face was covered in blood. Damn. Carynne reached out to Ise, but she avoided Carynne��s hand.


    ��Where are we? And why are we here? Why haven��t you been telling me properly?��


    ����As I said before, it��s better if you don��t know.��


    Carynne answered calmly.


    The owner of this room was Crown Prince Gueuze. He probably wouldn��t kill her outright. As she resembled his mother so much, she would be more useful alive than dead. Though, for someone with Carynne��s weak constitution, she had no intention of ying along with him.


    ��Should I just kill myself and be done with it?��


    Carynne looked toward the wall where a decorative sword was hung. But it was too high. Her arms couldn��t reach it. Last time, Crown Prince Gueuze had killed his son and left the sword on the ground, making it possible.


    ��What a hassle����


    Carynne thought about ways to take her own life. She knew from her past lives that biting her tongue wouldn��t kill her. Would smashing her head against the wall work? She had never seeded in killing herself that way.


    She should have reced the ne with a sturdy rope likest time. That would have made it easier to seed. Carynnemented her inadequacy. How could she die?


    ����Carynne, b-blood�� you have blood�� on your face����


    And then there was Ise.


    Seeing Ise��s blood-streaked face in the dark, Carynne felt despondent. Ise had also been kidnapped and had blood on her face from being hit on the head with something.


    Carynne touched the back of her head and spoke to Ise. Fortunately, it seemed like her head wasn��t cracked open.


    ��Ise, your face is covered in blood too.��


    ��W-What? Really? Oh, so that��s why�� Wait, let me see thentern.��


    Ise snatched thentern from Carynne and hurriedly wiped her face with her sleeve. When she saw the blood soaking into her sleeve, she panicked.


    ��Ahhh!��


    ��Shh.��


    ��Ahhhhh!��


    ��Ise. Be quiet.��


    ��It hurts! There��s b-blood!��


    The blood had been flowing all along, but now it seemed to bother her more. Carynne approached Ise and examined her head. She was bleeding from what appeared to be a blow. But seeing her moving around normally, Carynne realized there were more pressing concerns.


    ��Ise. Calm down����


    ����Agh.��


    ��Ise!��


    And then, still with her mouth open, Ise fainted and copsed to the ground.


    Carynne quickly put her ear to Ise��s chest, but her heart hadn��t stopped.


    ����What should I do?��


    Carynne lifted thentern higher.


    The true nature of the room hidden in the darkness was revealed.


    The room still had corpses hanging on the walls. Fortunately, there weren��t as many asst time. At ater date, the room would be filled�� but for now, the grotesqueness was somewhat diminished due to theparatively fewer number of bodies hanging.


    ����Ise����


    It was still revolting, but given that it was her second time seeing this room, Carynne could look at it calmly without screaming. She sighed, noticing that the number of bodies, or what had once been bodies, was significantly fewer than before.


    ��What should we do?��


    Once again, she was entangled with Crown Prince Gueuze.


    * * *


    ��I still can��t believe it.��


    Marquis Penceir cut him off before Raymond could even mention the suspect��s name. He looked like he didn��t want to hear another word. Raymond pointed to the documents he had brought and began to speak.


    ��Marquis, I was very hesitant about whether to inform you of this.��


    ��Do you understand what you��ve just said? Do you realize how dangerous this action is?��


    The evidence, statistics, testimonies, and suspect sketches Raymond presented all pointed to Crown Prince Gueuze. Raymond had practically fabricated the evidence while knowing the answer from the very start, but to the unsuspecting marquis, it was disturbingly urate.


    Despite this, the marquis had no intention of epting it. He, too, was part of the royal family.


    ��All this evidence points to the royal pce.��


    Raymond said, staring at the Marquis.


    ��We must stop more people from dying.��


    ��You must think you have seven lives. I��ll pretend I didn��t hear any of this.��


    ��Marquis.��


    As Raymond spent more time with the marquis, he became aware of the marquis��s cold side. It was something he hadn��t noticed when he was younger.


    The marquis detested Verdic for developing weapons or managing conflicts, but he never actively opposed Crown Prince Gueuze either.


    The number of victims Raymond had identified reached the thousands. Outwardly, Marquis Penceir and Crown Prince Gueuze appeared to be quite close. The marquis couldn��t have been oblivious to the crown prince��s gruesome secrets��yet, he never opposed the man.


    In the end, he was just a pawn to the marquis. The marquis was someone who could discard him for political purposes. To ascend to the throne.


    Prince Lewis would eventually die, and the marquis would be king. Raymond had seen the marquis��s dirty side and had even be his scapegoat. As people moved to arger stage, the ease with which they used and discarded others increased.


    Marquis Penceir rarely wanted to intervene in this matter. He pushed the documents Raymond handed him aside and advised,


    ��Take care. Sometimes you have to endure.��


    ��People are dying even now. Look at the timing of the discovered corpses and the near abductions. The people are anxious.��


    ��Far more people are dying on the border right now. A few disappearing in the capital isn��t even noticeable. It��s still too early.��


    The marquis��s eyes were cold. To him, Raymond was still a naive youngster. Seeing Raymond with dangerous evidence made the marquis suspicious.


    In the past, he had held more information than Raymond, so he could handle Raymond��s actions with ease. But now, realizing Raymond had more information, he reacted sharply. The marquis was displeased with Raymond leading the conversation.


    ��Marquis.��


    ��More importantly, it��s not your business. Why are you so concerned about those missing people? Most of them are prostitutes, aren��t they? Don��t worry about it.��


    ��Do prostitutes deserve to die?��


    The marquis merely scoffed at Raymond��s provocative words.


    ��Isn��t it better than you dying? Don��t speak so arrogantly.��


    ��Marquis.��


    Nevertheless, the current marquis didn��t seem at all inclined to ept Raymond��s opinion.

 Chapter 241

    Chapter 241


    Raymond sorted through the intel he had brought. It was impossible to manage Crown Prince Gueuze through the marquis right now. He was too stubborn. Unless pushed to the brink, he wouldn��t move. Raymond sighed.


    ��What should I do?��


    Even though he was trying his best to prevent people from dying, corpses were still appearing. Whenever Raymond blocked one path, Crown Prince Gueuze would find another way to bring in victims. The power of the ruler had that much capability.


    The number of missing people had certainly decreasedpared to before, but that was only in the past that Raymond remembered. People were still disappearing bit by bit.


    ��What should I do����


    ��If that��s all, I��ll be leaving now.��


    ��Marquis.��


    Raymond considered just killing everyone. Indeed, living virtuously was difficult. Trying to follow the right path only made things more tangled. He knew a simpler way.


    If he sided with Crown Prince Gueuze instead of the marquis, the prince would leave Carynne alone. Perhaps it was better to choose that way this time as well.��Marquis.��


    But he left nheless.


    Raymond swallowed a groan. What should he say to Carynne? Was it right to ignore the murders?


    Couldn��t a better world be made?


    If only the world could be kinder to Carynne. Just that much.


    * * *


    ��I hope Sir Raymond doesn��t regret it.��


    Carynne sighed as she dragged Ise to a plush sofa andid her down. Ise fainted, foaming at the mouth and unable to regain consciousness. As Carynne looked down at her, she continued talking to herself. Memories of her past life resurfaced.


    ��What was the problem this time? It��s still too early to die.��


    ��������


    The only constion was that she could view things more leisurely than before. She lit the firece with thentern and looked around the now brighter room, then sank into the sofa next to Ise.


    Carynne slowly examined the room filled with Crown Prince Gueuze��s hobbies. It wasrger than she remembered. She counted the number of people, confirming there were significantly fewer than before. So, had Crown Prince Gueuze killed that many people in just a few months?


    ��Come to think of it, there haven��t been many murder cases recently, right? It seems his involvement has had this effect.��


    Such was the way of the world. Carynne clicked her tongue.


    She pondered the differences from the past. The number of murders had indeed decreased. Raymond must have intervened. She wanted to praise him for keeping his promise behind her back.


    But to do that, she had to get out of here. The likelihood of that was very slim, so it seemed it would only be possible in the next life. This realization made her scowl.


    He would definitely nag her. By now, he might not even listen to her.


    Raymond had constantly disapproved of Carynne��s actions this time. Whether it was trying to befriend Ise or live a more virtuous life.


    He truly didn��t like her attempts. He tried to match her as much as possible, but his true feelings were revealed in his asional actions.


    Raymond wanted to be locked up alone with Carynne in the mansion again. Although he didn��t force it because he loved her, he still longed for it.


    It was difficult to persuade him that turning his back on the whole world was not better. If Carynne died at the hands of Crown Prince Gueuze this time, his words in the next life would be obvious. He would say that new attempts were useless and they should lock themselves up in the mansion again. Carynne couldn��t help but pout.


    ��Haa�� What should I do?��


    Carynne looked around the room at the sleeping Ise, but she couldn��t find an answer, and it gave her a headache. She was frustrated by the fact that there was nothing she could do right now. Thinking she should have brought a ne so she could have at least hung herself, Carynne felt like crying.


    Should she just kill herself?


    She had neither a ne nor drugs, but there were still some ways. Carynne stared at the burning firece. It wasn��t an easy way, but burning to death would be quick. Although it would be painful, the moment would be brief. But Carynne couldn��t bring herself to stick her head into the firece.


    ����Haa.��


    She didn��t want to die.


    But no other good ideas came to mind.


    Carynne recalled her past lives but had onlye to Crown Prince Gueuze��s room once.


    Could this situation be resolved like when Ise shed with Duke Luthe? Carynne thought deeply, but Ise didn��t seem like a good solution against Crown Prince Gueuze.


    There was no one higher than Crown Prince Gueuze in thisnd. The old king was on the brink of death, and even Verdic had to bow before Crown Prince Gueuze. Duke Luthe and the crown prince were in entirely different positions. If Ise learned the true nature of the crown prince, neither of them would survive��they would both surely die.


    In the past, Carynne had been able to buy time because there were two more people. Crown Prince Gueuze��s hatred for his son, Prince Lewis, allowed her to divert his attention and gave her a chance to arm herself.


    And there was Donna. While Donna bit his leg, Carynne had an opportunity.


    But Ise was more of a burden than any help at all.


    <i>Crackle, crackle��</i>


    Carynne stared at the burning logs. There was still a chance. A chance to die quickly.


    ��Ise.��


    The only reason she wasn��tmitting suicide right now was because of that woman. She had just started to feel a bit of friendship, and it was a shame to have to start over.


    Most of all, she was too curious about what Ise was going to say to her.


    * * *


    Crown Prince Gueuze walked slowly. He was in a very bad mood. Recently, his hobbies had not been going well.


    He enjoyed ying with people. This extended to more direct areas. Even though he was soon to be king, he knew it was hard to get his hobbies recognized.


    So Crown Prince Gueuze had to indulge quietly. It was enough. He had enjoyed his hobbies quietly for a long time. Quietly, slowly, discreetly. There had been no problems. He also had the ability to hide them.


    But recently, things weren��t going right. With repeated failures, Crown Prince Gueuze was on the verge of madness with frustration. He red at the subordinate reporting histest failure and spoke.


    ��Tell me, what��s the point of keeping you alive?��


    ��I-I-I apologize, Your Highness����


    Useless trash watched his every move, but even that annoyed him. Crown Prince Gueuze considered whether it was time to rece his subordinates. Should he tolerate those who couldn��t even procure the proper materials? There was no need.


    ��Rud, looking at you displeases me.��


    ��Y-Your Highness! Your Highness!��


    ��Shut your mouth. I hate noise.��


    ��Please, please spare me!��


    Crown Prince Gueuze said no more. As he continued walking, a death cry sounded from behind him. Cain, the next inmand, must have beheaded Rud.


    He thought about dismembering that man to relieve his frustration, but work and hobbies should be kept separate. Crown Prince Gueuze moved on, suppressing his disappointment.


    What should he do? So far, he had avoided touching the people within the pce, but he was reaching his limit. He might be able to quietly manage if it was just the maids. Anyone would do for now.


    ��Your Highness.��


    A voice interrupted his thoughts, breaking his reverie.

 Chapter 242

    Chapter 242


    ��I am in a very bad mood today, Cain. Do you want to see me rece two people in a day?��


    ��I have something to show you.��


    Despite Gueuze��s words, Cain dared to continue speaking. When Gueuze stopped walking, Cain bowed deeply.


    ��Rud failed to do his job properly, but there were circumstances.��


    ��If others found out, you should have handled it properly.��


    ��I brought those who discovered us instead.��


    ����I clearly instructed you to choose those for kidnapping who wouldn��t cause trouble.��


    Crown Prince Gueuze looked down at him coldly. He had ordered them to quickly stage an ident and kill anyone if they were discovered. But kidnapping instead of killing? Crown Prince Gueuze was on the verge of madness with subordinates who couldn��t handle their tasks properly.


    As Gueuze raised his finger to issue a new order, Cain hurriedly continued.��It��s two women. Your Highness will definitely like them.��


    * * *


    Carynne finished sorting her thoughts.


    She had to do what she could. There was no possibility of getting out of here. And this time, she would die again. But it was fine. Even if it was a pity, she could start over. Raymond would be depressed, but this wouldn��t be the end. And besides, Carynne��s goal in this life was to be friends with Ise.


    ��Ise, hey. Wake up.��


    ��������


    Ise couldn��t regain consciousness easily.


    But she had to wake her up. Knowing where they were, Carynne had to talk to Ise before <i>he</i> arrived. Carynne raised her hand high. Would this be okay? There was no other way since Ise wouldn��t wake up. Carynne called once more.


    ��Ise.��


    ��������


    <i>Smack��!</i>


    Carynne pped Ise��s cheek. The crisp sound echoed through the room. Carynne felt a bit relieved.


    But this wasn��t for revenge��it was to wake her up. Carynne reminded herself of this as she raised her hand again. She had to wake her up. Ise groaned but couldn��t open her eyes properly.


    <i>Smack��!</i>


    ��Ow! It hurts! W-What��s going on!��


    ��Wake up.��


    Ise grabbed her cheeks and stared in disbelief at Carynne.


    ����Carynne?��


    ��Yes. Get a grip now.��


    ��You hit me?��


    ��Yes.��


    Ise gaped in astonishment but quickly got up before Carynne could raise her hand again.


    ��You crazy�� How could you����


    ��Look behind you.��


    ��Why did you hit me!��


    ��To wake you up. Try to understand where we are.��


    It took a long time to manage the reeling Ise. She almost fainted again. Carynne had to p Ise several more times to keep her eyes from rolling back. Ise trembled violently.


    ��W-Where are we����


    Carynne grabbed the crying Ise. Crying wouldn��t help here.


    ��Don��t cry, listen carefully. We��ve been kidnapped, and unless some extraordinary miracle happens, we��ll probably die here. I acknowledge that the chances of survival are low. Do you understand?��


    <i>����Hiic.��</i>


    ��But I��m going to try to find a way to survive.��


    Ise, still trembling, nodded.


    ��First, pretend to faint again. I��ll try to negotiate with the owner of this room, and if an opportunity arises, run away. And if����


    Should she tell Ise about Raymond? Should she tell him toe and save them? Carynne thought for a moment but shook her head. It seemed better for both of them to quicklymit suicide rather than wait for rescue.


    No, it��s fine. Let the people of this life live. She and Raymond can quickly start over.


    ��If you seed in escaping, live well. And if my fatheres looking for me, just tell him I went missing. Can you do that?��


    ��What about you, Carynne?��


    ��I won��t be able to get out.��


    Carynne shook her head. She wasn��t even sure she could safely get Ise out. This room was Crown Prince Gueuze��s domain. His people would be nearby. Still, there might be a way. For example, sending Ise out while staying behind herself.


    Alone, she could die quickly. Hoping that Raymond woulde to rescue her was less efficient than sticking her head in the firece and quickly moving on to the next life.


    Then, she heard footsteps in the distance. There wasn��t much time. Someone wasing.


    ����Ise. What were you going to say then?��


    ��What?��


    ��Weren��t you trying to tell me something?��


    ��Well����


    At that moment, a voice came from outside the door.


    <i>��Your Highness will definitely like them.��</i>


    It was toote.


    Damn. Carynne pushed Ise��s head into the sofa.


    ��Pretend to be unconscious and stay quiet. Don��t open your eyes.��


    <i>Clunk��</i>


    The heavy door opened. Carynne swallowed hard as she watched it.


    She felt a sense of d��j�� vu. She remembered when Raymond walked through that door. Of course, it wasn��t him beyond the door now��just one of her mother��s failed bookmarks.


    A middle-aged man.


    The true wielder of power in this country. Her mother��s former lover. A madman.


    Crown Prince Gueuze looked down at Carynne with an unreadable expression.


    ����What kind of scene is this? They aren��t even tied up?��


    ��I-I apologize.��


    ��This is ridiculous. Tie them up immediately.��


    ��Yes, sir.��


    The man tied up Carynne and Ise��s hands and feet. Ise, with her eyes closed, trembled slightly, but luckily no one seemed to notice because Carynne kept talking.


    ��Do you really have to tie me up?��


    ��I hate hassle.��


    Crown Prince Gueuze enjoyed seeing people crying, fainting, or screaming in his room. Sometimes, there were even those whoughed maniacally. Anyone who entered this room never left alive. The hanging corpses in the dark room made that obvious to anyone.


    But the red-haired woman in front of him was sitting calmly, looking up at him in a rxed manner. Crown Prince Gueuze tilted his head and asked Cain.


    ��Did you buy this woman?��


    That seemed the only conclusion. Had they paid a hefty sum and brought her with an exnation? But Cain shook his head.


    ��No. She witnessed it, so we had no choice.��


    ��This is just my nature, Your Highness.��


    <i>����Ha.��</i>


    Crown Prince Gueuze looked down at Cain beside him. A woman who knew who he was��a noble. Cain��s face turned pale. He had made a grave mistake in kidnapping. Cain almost envied the already dead Rud.


    The crown prince disliked targets that could cause trouble. He knew how to separate his hobbies from his public duties. But unfortunately. Cain gritted his teeth.


    He should have just let the women go. Even if they had reported finding those corpses, it would have ended there.


    ��Please let thedy beside me go. I have something to tell Your Highness.��


    Crown Prince Gueuze raised an eyebrow.


    ��You have guts, knowing who I am.��


    ��I��m not going to get out anyway. Are you perhaps afraid of me?��


    It was a provocation that felt almost trivial, but Crown Prince Gueuze signaled his subordinate to leave. The man left, bowing, but that didn��t mean there was an opportunity.


    ��Let me tell you, there are dozens outside the door.��


    ��Yes, and this is a dungeon.��


    ��Were you conscious when you were dragged in?��


    ��No. I��ve been here in a previous life, Your Highness.��


    ����That��s not a very amusing joke.��


    Crown Prince Gueuze turned away from Carynne and walked to the wall. He inserted a key into the furniture next to the firece. From it, he took out several rtively small hooks and knives. Carynne realized that the gap between the past and the present prince wasrger than she had thought.


    ��It��s definitely different from before.��

 Chapter 243

    Chapter 243


    At that time, Crown Prince Gueuze sought to satisfy his lust rather than kill Carynne. And further, he was more focused on killing Prince Lewis.


    However, the current Gueuze seemed to have no idea who she was. The reason Carynne and Ise ended up here was sheer bad luck. Unlike before, he saw Carynne as just another material for his work. He calmly prepared for his task without excitement.


    ��I��ll figure out who you are slowly.��


    Crown Prince Gueuze tapped Carynne��s head lightly, smiling slightly.


    ��I��ve been very frustratedtely because I haven��t been able to enjoy my hobbies. And your face�� it��s quite to my liking.��


    Crown Prince Gueuze��s eyes gleamed.


    Carynne spoke up.


    ��I suppose so. I look just like my mother.��


    ��Is that so? You have to thank your mother then. I��ll carve your face off.��Crown Prince Gueuze seemed in a hurry.


    Carynne blinked slowly.


    ��My mother spoke a lot about you, Your Highness.��


    ����Who is your mother?��


    ��Catherine Nora Enide.��


    Crown Prince Gueuze stood up.


    His face twisted strangely. It was a name he hadn��t expected at all.


    ����What a coincidence.��


    ��It is, isn��t it?��


    Crown Prince Gueuze covered his mouth.


    He paced around the room, trying to calm his thoughts and excitement. Though he covered his mouth, it was clear he was grinning widely behind his fingers. He looked extremely delighted. Small chuckles could be heard.


    ��I have a lot to say�� Catherine, Catherine. Yes, it��s been seventeen years�� This is delightful. <i>Ha, haha.</i> How amusing.��


    ��Yes. My mother, she����


    Carynne desperately tried to remember anything about Catherine. She needed to think of something to divert Crown Prince Gueuze��s attention. What had Catherine said about him?


    But nothing significant came to Carynne��s mind. While she was pondering, Crown Prince Gueuze stood in front of her, waiting.


    ��What did Catherine say about me?��


    ��If you want to hear more, I have a condition.��


    ��Sorry, but I have no intention of letting you go.��


    ��I expected that.��


    Carynne nodded.


    The only difference she could bargain for was between dying now or staying alive a bit longer. Crown Prince Gueuze wouldn��t let her go.


    ��Please spare this woman instead of me.��


    ��That��s not possible either.��


    Carynne bowed her head.


    ��Then I won��t say a word about my mother.��


    ��There are many ways to get answers from people.��


    Crown Prince Gueuze whispered as he brought a dagger close to Carynne. The fabric near her chest was sliced like paper by the sharp de. Her cleavage was exposed, and a trickle of blood ran down. It stung. Carynne frowned and spoke.


    ��I don��t expect to live, but I��m not afraid of dying either. I know I won��t get out of here alive.��


    Carynne took a deep breath.


    Let��s think carefully. The previous Crown Prince Gueuze had once said, <i>��I wonder if you also think you��re too old.��</i>


    <i>Also</i>, he said. Carynne recalled his words. Catherine must have told Crown Prince Gueuze that she could live again.


    ��Didn��t my mother ever talk about living again?��


    ��������


    ��You probably didn��t believe her.��


    Crown Prince Gueuze fell silent.


    His excitement subsided, and his expression twisted. Carynne looked up at his face.


    ��Don��t you think my mother refused you because she wasn��t afraid of death? My mother and I aren��t afraid of such things.��


    She dared to refuse a royal proposal.


    If a man was strong or wealthy, a woman refusing his affection often faced danger. The love professed by men with a need to show off often came with violence.


    For someone like Crown Prince Gueuze, it wouldn��t be surprising if he had killed both Catherine and her child for daring to refuse him. But in the end, he had allowed Catherine to marry and have a child. He didn��t kill her after all.


    ��In this life, I am prepared to end my days in this room. But please listen to this. Just throw this woman back where she came from.��


    ��I think having an ally would also benefit you.��


    ��I don��t want to share my mother��s story with anyone else.��


    And Carynne looked up at him with slightly teary eyes.


    ��To be honest, I am quite ashamed.��


    <i>����Ha.��</i>


    ��You wouldn��t treat me like a daughter, would you?��


    ��Struggle all you want.��


    Crown Prince Gueuze pressed on the wound he had made on her chest. Carynne let out a faint groan. The pain red up. She could feel Ise trembling behind her.


    ��I know the girl behind you is awake.��


    ��������


    <i>��Heh, haha.��</i>


    Only then did Carynne realize that Ise was not pretending to sleep properly. Despite being told to feign unconsciousness.


    * * *


    Zion scratched his head in contemtion.


    ��It seems like she��s pregnant, doesn��t it?��


    Ise hadn��t said it directly, but Zion Electra, who had lived a life loved by many women, could easily guess the situation with a little thought. The fact Ise couldn��t speak about Carynne was easy to deduce.


    They had gone to the hospital together, and Ise had been worried about not being able to tell her the examination results. The words Ise almost said before denying them. Zion guessed that Carynne was pregnant. There was no other reason for Carynne to have a condition she couldn��t easily disclose to others.


    The problem was what to do next. Should he tell Raymond or not? Whether Carynne was pregnant or not didn��t concern Zion much. Speaking about it would only create nasty gossip.


    But Zion scratched his head, troubled by the fact that the presumed father was his close friend, Raymond. Would it be better to tell Raymond in advance? Ise��s worry had transferred to him, but he couldn��t find an answer either.


    Maybe Raymond already knew.


    If so, his recent actions made sense.


    Raymond��s reluctance towards Ise, his care for the penniless Carynne, his awkwardness in front of her, his hasty retirement from the military, and his unprecedented emotional fluctuations could all be exined by that.


    But the idea that Raymond had touched a woman he wasn��t married to, and even got her pregnant, was hard for him to ept. Especially since it was someone like Carynne. Though poor, she was still a nobledy.


    Zion was worried that if he acted as if he knew first, he would get entangled in troublesome affairs. For now, it was important to see Carynne��s reaction after Ise spoke to her. He hade to ask about it, but��


    Ise was nowhere to be seen.


    ��Where on earth did she go?��


    Zion had been lingering around the Grand Cathedral where Ise and Carynne were staying since early on, but neither of them hade out yet. Priests came and went, but he didn��t want to face those who didn��t approve of him flirting openly with Ise.


    ��Did the conversation not go well?��


    He thought Ise would definitely tell him the result.


    ��Pardon me, Reverend.��


    Eventually, Zion stopped a passing priest to ask about Ise.


    ��Excuse me, I would like to see Miss Ise Evans, who is staying at the cathedral. Could you call her for me?��


    ����How should I know that?��


    The priest��s expression looked slightly annoyed.


    ��How far are we responsible for Miss Ise��s behavior?��


    ����I��m not sure what you mean����


    ��We have repeatedly advised her about the curfew. What can we say to someone who doesn��t attend worship or volunteer at all?��


    The priest was clearly averse to getting involved in personal disputes.

 Chapter 244

    Chapter 244


    Young men and womene to the Grand Cathedral in the capital with various problems. The bishop was already displeased with such people. Regardless of the problem, they had to follow thews within the cathedral.


    But Ise, who lived as she pleased, was nothing more than an unwee guest to them.


    ��Don��t ask me about Miss Ise.��


    ��I had an appointment with her, but she hasn��te out.��


    ��How would I know if she has other appointments or if she��s sleeping in her room?��


    His voice was clearly irritated.


    Whenever Ise went out, she was usually apanied by Zion. And if she had other ns, she always told him in advance. Even considering she might have forgotten due to being preupied with Carynne yesterday, Zion felt uneasy. Why hadn��t shee out yet?


    ��Could you at least check if she��s sleeping in her room? I��m just worried.��


    ��The Grand Cathedral is a sacred ce, not an inn.����Reverend.��


    Zion suppressed a groan inwardly.


    This strict-looking priest showed no intention of cooperating.


    ��Then could you at least tell me if Miss Carynne Hare is here?��


    ��I don��t know that either.��


    Suddenly, the priest avoided his eyes. The priest��s behavior was increasingly suspicious.


    ��Reverend.��


    Zion stared openly at the priest��s face and spoke.


    ��Mister Verdic Evans��Miss Ise Evans��s father��is worried. He wants to see her. I��m in contact with him right now.��


    ��������


    ��Reverend, I��ll ask you again. Is Ise Evans in her room?��


    The priest could not answer.


    * * *


    ��Your proposal is, well, not very appealing.��


    Crown Prince Gueuze smiled, his eyes narrowing. His gaze moved past Carynne to Ise behind her.


    ��Aren��t you curious about my mother?��


    ��Little girl, don��t you think I can get enough information just by torturing you?��


    Carynne looked at Crown Prince Gueuze and had to think desperately. How could she get him to grant her request?


    Crown Prince Gueuze looked down at the trembling, turned Ise with keen interest.


    ��Even if it��s a sudden ident, I have enough ability to cover it up.��


    ��Can��t you show a little mercy to that child at least?��


    ��Why would I take any risk?��


    ��That child is the daughter of Verdic Evans.��


    Carynne revealed Ise��s identity. Verdic had connections with Crown Prince Gueuze. It was Verdic who had captured Carynne and handed her over to Gueuze in the past. He must also know about Gueuze��s peculiarities.


    ����Hmm, that��s surprising.��


    Crown Prince Gueuze��s smile widened.


    ��But that doesn��t necessarily mean I have to let her go. Seeing how desperately you want to save her, it seems you��re cing your hopes on her. That makes me even more unwilling to let her go. Both of you, in fact.��


    ��If you show kindness to Mister Verdic, he would be more loyal to you.��


    ��He should be loyal to me anyway.��


    Crown Prince Gueuze watched Carynne��s continued pleas with the amusement of watching a parrot perform tricks.


    ��You don��t need to worry about me. I��m a man of many resources.��


    Crown Prince Gueuze lightly tapped Ise with his hook. Despite the situation, Ise kept her eyes closed. She couldn��t open them, trembling with sweat and tears.


    Carynne wished Gueuze would focus on her instead, but he was enjoying Ise��s reaction.


    ��You seem to be quite close friends.��


    ��I don��t think so, to be honest.��


    Carynne confessed. From her perspective, they still weren��t friends. Their rtionship had been rocky without much progress. Moreover, Ise was a burden to Carynne right now.


    ��Still, I don��t want that child to die.��


    Ise��s sobbing was faintly audible.


    Carynne was slightly moved by her own words. She thought her recent line was pretty good. She hoped Ise would be moved, but Ise seemed too terrified to even hear her. It was a bit disappointing.


    ��Hmm, then how about this, Your Highness?��


    ��What are you suggesting?��


    ��For instance, you could take me as your new mistress.��


    Crown Prince Gueuze still didn��t know about her rtionship with Raymond.


    This time was different. In the past, he chose to use Carynne, Raymond��s fianc��e, as a tribute, but this time he had obtained Carynne by chance. The daughter of Catherine, who had suddenly fallen into his hands. Carynne held the information.


    ��I��m willing to respect Your Highness��s hobbies.��


    <i>Unlike my mother.</i>


    Carynne fidgeted with her fingers.


    ��To be honest, I don��t really understand my mother. She called it true love, but I��m not sure if she loved my father that much.��


    ����Keep talking.��


    ��My mother�� she didn��t seem to care much about any man.��


    Carynne had to choose her words carefully.


    Her mother must have known that Crown Prince Gueuze couldn��t get her pregnant despite multiple attempts at life, so she didn��t choose him. But it wouldn��t be wise to tell him that. Carynne paused.


    ��My mother was�� more obsessed with pure love.��


    ��������


    ��She believed that my father��s love, without money or power, was more pure.��


    Carynne wondered if it was too obvious a lie, but Crown Prince Gueuze��s reaction wasn��t bad. He was quietly listening to Carynne��s words. Carynne continued.


    ��������


    ��But I��m different. I don��t mind if Your Highness takes me as a mistress. I��m satisfied with a few dresses and jewels. If you don��t want to make it public, that��s fine. But I��m just suggesting. Isn��t it a good deal? A woman who screams and resists under torture or a young lover whoes willingly, which do you prefer?��


    ����You are quite bold.��


    Crown Prince Gueuze stared at Carynne for a long time before standing up.


    He went to the door. When he pulled the cord with a bell attached, the door opened, and men rushed in.


    ��What is it, Your Highness?��


    ��Take that woman back to where she came from. Only the blonde one.��


    ��Pardon, sir?��


    Carynne and the men had the same shocked expression. For Crown Prince Gueuze to return a kidnapped woman was dangerous. Even an ordinary murderer wouldn��t do such a thing. Moreover, Crown Prince Gueuze was a man with much to lose. To do such a thing? Carynne found it hard to believe.


    ��You look surprised.��


    ����Yes. Actually, I am.��


    ��I am confident we won��t be caught.��


    Crown Prince Gueuze sat down beside Carynne and continued.


    ��Even if I have such hobbies, His Majesty will protect me.��


    Then he looked at Ise.


    ��Verdic must act properly if he wants to keep his daughter safe. Do behave properly, Verdic��s daughter.��


    Carynne felt a tickling sensation on her back.


    She felt a sneezeing but held it in. Ise��s fingers were quickly moving on Carynne��s back. She seemed to be trying tomunicate something with those wriggling fingers.


    ��Hurry and take her out.��


    ����Understood.��


    The door closed.


    Now it was just Crown Prince Gueuze and Carynne again.


    Carynne looked up at Crown Prince Gueuze, who was smiling from ear to ear in the dark room. Although he had seemed so grotesque before, he no longer felt as scary.


    ��Shall we continue our conversation?��


    Crown Prince Gueuze approached Carynne with a hook in hand. Carynne saw the object glinting in the light.


    ��What do you think about both?��


    ��������


    ��I��ll enjoy both options. Starting with your innards.��


    He pointed downward.


    ��Right down to here.��

 Chapter 245

    Chapter 245


    <i>What should I do?</i>


    Carynne grit her teeth.


    She had nned to die and start over again. Now that Ise was gone, there was no one left to hold her back. Carynne looked up at Crown Prince Gueuze, who was licking his lips, and pondered.


    She was supposed to be fearless. Dying shouldn��t have been scary, and Gueuze��s lust shouldn��t have mattered.


    But Ise��sst words.


    As she left, Ise had hastily written something on Carynne��s back with her finger.


    <i>��I will definitelye to save you.��</i>


    Such an emotional statement.


    Ise intended to save her. The same Ise who had always driven Carynne to death. Verdic��s daughter. Raymond��s original fianc��e. The day had finallye when she dered she would save Carynne herself.Carynne didn��t necessarily believe she would seed, but the word ��definitely�� conveyed Ise��s determination, which moved her.


    Carynne��s efforts had finally paid off. At least, they were no longer enemies. They had be allies, risking their lives for each other. This was more than enough to call them friends orrades.


    But Ise��s next sentence plunged her into despair.


    ��You��re pregnant.��


    * * *


    How could she be pregnant? Carynne looked down at her stomach. It wasn��t showing yet, and she didn��t feel anything inside. Her periods had always been irregr, so she hadn��t paid attention. She had thought she was infertile, so pregnancy had never crossed her mind.


    What was different this time? Was it because Dun hadn��te from the start? That was the only difference. Should she be happy now that she finally had an answer? But Carynne couldn��t feel any joy. Her mind was filled with doubt and anxiety.


    ��What happens if I die without giving birth?��


    She was confused.


    ��What happens if I die while pregnant?��


    This sudden news didn��t bring relief��it only increased her anxiety.


    Carynne bit her lip. If she carried the pregnancy to term and gave birth, she could pass on her fate and then die. But she didn��t know what would happen if she died in her current state.


    She might die forever this time.


    What if both she and the child died, and she never came back? It would be the ordinary death she had always longed for.


    If it had been in the past, she might have been happy with this news. A few years ago, she would have danced with joy. She would have willingly embraced death, ted by the sense of aplishment of finally reaching it.


    But now��


    Why now, of all times? In this ce? At this moment?


    Carynnemented. Despite all her efforts, she had failed so far, only to learn she was pregnant in the worst possible ce.


    Until a moment ago, Carynne had been calm. She wasn��t afraid of death because she was certain she could start over again.


    It was regrettable that the improved rtionship with her father and the progress with Ise due to Nancy��smotion would all be for naught, but it wasn��t a desperate enough situation to prevent her from dying.


    With Raymond, who also repeated lives, she had nothing to fear.


    Raymond.


    ��I don��t want to think about anything else but loving you.��


    ��That��s enough now.��


    Carynne thought of Raymond��s face. If she died, would he cry? Until a moment ago, her regrets in this life had been Ise and her father.


    But the thought of truly dying made her feel unbearably heavy-hearted. What if this endless cycle of life actually ended? What would happen to Raymond?


    Raymond had borne the weight of many years and came to her. If she went to eternal death alone, what would happen to him? Could he survive?


    Carynne felt breathless.


    If she were to die, they should die together. She couldn��t leave him alone in this world.


    ��What are you thinking about? Are you afraid of death now?��


    ����I��m not sure, Your Highness.��


    ��It seems you are afraid.��


    ��It seems so, yes.��


    A moment ago, she was ready to die, but now she had to live.


    She couldn��t die.


    At the very least, she couldn��t die here. And she couldn��t let Crown Prince Gueuze be the one beside her when she died.


    She had to dieter, beside Raymond.


    What should she do?


    Unlike before, the crown prince carefully tied her arms to the headboard of the bed. The fact that the restraints were made of blue silk and wouldn��t hurt her wrists was her only constion.


    But they were not loose enough to break free by shaking them. Though her legs weren��t tied, moving them wouldn��t allow her to escape either. He had left them free only to watch her struggle whenever he wanted to subdue her.


    Crown Prince Gueuze sat beside her on the bed, looking down at her and stroking her hand. Carynne looked up at him.


    ��Your Highness, what do you want to do?��


    ��I wouldn��t rmend provoking me. My patience isn��t that deep.��


    Carynne wanted to argue that she had only asked a question, but she kept silent, not knowing what might provoke him.


    ��What should I do with you first?��


    What would happen if she told Crown Prince Gueuze that she was pregnant? Carynne wondered how he would react to the news of another man��s child inside her.


    But he was a madman, making his reaction unpredictable.


    ��I would prefer something that doesn��t hurt.��


    ��Honesty is good. Yes, I��ll have to think of more varied ways with you.��


    Carynne watched his fingers slide from her chest to her stomach. Bing a sexual toy wasn��t what scared her. The problem was that he wanted more than just that.


    ��Do I look a lot like my mother when she was young?��


    ��You resemble her so much that you could almost be the same person.��


    ��Did you do this kind of thing with my mother too?��


    ��Well. Are you curious?��


    ��A little.��


    Who��s to say she wouldn��t end up as one of the corpses hanging on that wall? There was no guarantee of safety. She couldn��t be sure he wouldn��t suddenly want to examine her insides at some point.


    ��Are you scared?��


    ��Yes.��


    ��Good. Then would you like to scream?��


    * * *


    Ise panted.


    Her wrists and ankles were tied, and she was shoved into a sack. Someone was carrying her. With her mouth gagged, she could barely breathe.


    ��Hurry, hurry����


    She couldn��t stop crying. Was she alive? Her head spun. Where had it all gone wrong? What had she done wrong? She shouldn��t have gone to that ce. No, she shouldn��t have left home at all. Ise regretted everything she had done. Her head ached.


    As she was carried around like a piece of luggage, a flood of thoughts invaded her mind. Would she survive? If she ever got home again, she would never go out alone again. She would never leave without security again. And.


    ��What about Carynne?��


    Ise felt a lump in her throat. Had her final message reached her? Ise wasn��t sure if she had done the right thing. But at that moment, she had felt she had to leave that message. Without telling her, if Carynne died, she would regret it forever.


    Ise squeezed her eyes shut. She wanted to be freed quickly.


    ��Ugh!��


    Sudden pain hit Ise. She felt like she had been thrown somewhere.


    ��What, what is this?��


    ��Well, you were unlucky. Go to heaven.��


    She couldn��t breathe.


    She couldn��t breathe at all. Dirty water kept flooding into her eyes, nose, and mouth as she thrashed. Ise realized she was drowning.


    ��Mmfff!��

 Chapter 246

    Chapter 246


    ��Jesse, press it down with the stick.��


    ��Wouldn��t it be better to just let the sack float away? It��s all tied up anyway.��


    ��No, what if it floats back up? Press it down and make sure she��spletely dead before letting go.��


    ��Wouldn��t it be better to just dismember her?��


    ��It��s better to just make it look like a regr drowning. What if the girl��s father starts poking around? Tsk.��


    They shoved the struggling sack with a blunt stick. Bubbles were rising from within. Given time, she would drown.


    Cain knew that Verdic must not trace this back to Crown Prince Gueuze. Verdic asionally supplied materials that left no traces. If he found out his daughter had been brutally murdered, he would investigate thoroughly. If he discovered that Gueuze had ordered it, things would getplicated.


    ��Ah, yes, that��s right. Just make it look normal�� But shouldn��t we at least have a taste before killing her?��


    ��Maybe that would have been more normal. A prostitute who epts money is better than one who cries and resists.����You��ve never tried it. Once you do, breaking them in is fun. By the way, what should we do for dinner after this?��


    ��Not sure�� How about fried fish? Seeing them p around makes me want to eat fish.��


    ��Ugh. You��ve got a strong stomach. I can��t stand anything that smells fishy for a while.��


    ��This is clean enough, so what��s the problem?��


    ��Yesterday��s stuff was pretty disgusting.��


    The man grimaced. Lately, Crown Prince Gueuze had been hysterical due to theck of proper materials, making the work unbearable.


    ��Anyway, since Rud��s gone, that��s practically a promotion for me, right? Lunch is on me.��


    ��Hey, did you hear that? Cain��s treating us.��


    Calm and casual voices exchanged above the water��s surface.


    Looking at the wriggling sack, Cain sighed. He wanted to finish quickly and go have a meal.


    ��Take care of it properly.��


    It was inevitable. How could they possibly let a witness live? Though they imed to release the red-haired woman to deceive her, Crown Prince Gueuze had no intention of letting this girl live. Whoever she was.


    ��Is she still struggling?��


    ��Yeah.��


    ��Persistent. How about we bleed her out and then put her back in?��


    ��Forget it. I��ve told you a hundred times��Verdic��s gonna dig if we mess this up.��


    ��Are you talking about Verdic Evans?��


    ��Yeah, that��s right.��


    It happened in an instant.


    Cain thought his vision darkened.


    Night? Did night suddenly fall? Such absurd thoughts came first. But then the excruciating pain hit, and he screamed.


    <i>��Ah, aah, AHHHH!��</i>


    ��Shut it.��


    An unending pain filled his eyes. And then his vision cleared. Cain opened his eyes.


    Or so he thought. His vision was strange. His eyes were showing his thigh and other scenes. His vision was shaking wildly. His own face.


    Why can I see my face?


    ��Aaaaah!��


    By the time he realized his eyeball had been torn out and was dangling down, it was toote. The intruding man kicked him into the water despite Cain holding his torn eyeball in panic. Cain couldn��t even struggle in the water. He had to hold onto his dangling eyeball.


    ��Who are you?��


    ��Ugh, ugh.��


    ��Why don��t you just take a dip? Save us some trouble.��


    ��You�� you bastard!��


    Jesse pulled out a dagger from his coat.


    ��My own de��s pretty long too.��


    Zion drew his own sword. The man was startled by the length of Zion��s sword and his battle-ready stance.


    ��Spare, spare me����


    <i>Thunk��</i>


    But his plea was cut short. A stone flew at him, hitting his nose and mouth simultaneously, and he copsed.


    ��Leave this to me, will you?��


    ��One survivor is enough. The guy with the missing eye.��


    ��You need more than one for a proper interrogation, Sir Raymond!��


    ��First, pull the one in the water out. Looks like a person. I��ll take care of the rest.��


    ��What?��


    ��Hurry up.��


    Only then did Zion notice the bundle floating in the water. Damn it. Zion cursed as he jumped into the sewer. The moment he grabbed it, he realized it was a living person. It hadn��t stiffened yet.


    <i>Ssh��</i>


    Disgusted by the dirty water, Zion grimaced as he untied the bundle. Was this what the men had been pressing down with the stick earlier?


    Indeed, there was a person inside. But Zion was shocked to find the very person he was looking for.


    ��Ise?��


    How on earth did Raymond know that Ise was here?


    Zion looked up at his superior, the man he thought he knew well.


    Raymond was looking down at Ise with an unusually stern expression.


    * * *


    Ise woke from aforting sleep to see her parents�� faces for the first time in a long while. Their appearance felt so unfamiliar that she couldn��t easily speak. She couldn��t distinguish whether she was dreaming or had awakened from one.


    ��See, you only suffer when you leave home for so long.��


    ����Father, Mother.��


    Verdic sighed as he looked down at Ise. Her mother, Selena, also had tears in her eyes. Ise looked around at her surroundings.


    ��Is this�� our house in the capital?��


    ��Yes, Ise. Everything is fine now. You��re safe.��


    It was her room, made of cream-colored fabric and bright wood. It was afortable room, iparable to the small room at the Grand Cathedral. She had used it every summer since childhood, but strangely, it felt unreal. Was her room always this nice?


    ��Ah, <i>oww.��</i>


    ��Don��t move too much. You have injuries everywhere.��


    ��All this suffering�� What a mess.��


    The stinging sensation on her face reminded her of what she had been through. Ise sat up, clutching the nket. It was soft and warm. Tears fell onto the pure white fabric.


    <i>��Hic, hiic����</i>


    She had survived.


    She had survived. She had escaped that dark, terrifying room and the filthy water. Finally, she was alive, holding her parents�� hands at home.


    Selena hugged Ise. Mother and daughter embraced, crying and celebrating her survival. After a while, Verdic, with a hoarse voice, spoke.


    ��Let��s go home now.��


    Looking at their battered daughter, they realized anew that they were a family.


    When Ise roamed the capital, her mother, Selena, had always kept an eye on her reputation through people. Despite her worries, Ise hadn��t acted excessively.


    Verdic had been able to keep track of his daughter��s actions through his wife and had been helping her ordingly. The gold Ise sold had always fetched reasonable prices, and substantial donations were regrly made to the Grand Cathedral.


    But being together in a safe ce was different. The world was still dangerous for Ise.


    Ise looked at her parents holding hands, finding it strange.


    ��For the time being, your mother and I will be by your side. It seems we haven��t spent enough time together as a family.��


    ��We��ve realized that life is truly unpredictable.��


    ��Father, Mother.��


    Ise blinked.


    ��And we need to prepare for your wedding again.��


    ��What?��


    Ise spoke urgently. Verdic nodded.


    ��I know who you want to marry.��


    ��Marry?��


    ��Zion Electra. He��s not worthy of you, but�� since he saved you, I��ll allow it. He may still be immature, but I��ll see to it that he��s groomed into the position properly.��

 Chapter 247

    Chapter 247


    ��Sir Zion? Ah����


    Ise remembered herst thoughts. Just as she believed she could survive, she was thrown into the water. She remembered the torment of struggling in the endless flood.


    ��Yes, he saved you. He looked for you all over and, by sheer luck, managed to rescue you.��


    ��I see����


    Ise touched her neck. It was a miracle that she was breathing. Was it because Zion often walked by the water with her that he could find her? It was fortunate she had been found not long after being kidnapped. A little more time, and she would have died.


    ��And he killed the man as well.��


    ��Who?��


    ��Who else? The man who tried to drown you.��


    Ise realized the situation hadn��t been fully understood. Since she had fainted, everyone seemed unaware of what had happened before. Now wasn��t the time to lie leisurely and discuss other matters.��Father, no, it wasn��t�� it wasn��t just that incident.��


    ��What?��


    ��I wasn��t thrown into the water right away. I was kidnapped for almost a whole day.��


    Ise looked out the window. The morning sunlight was streaming in. It meant she had been kidnapped for at least a day longer. She urgently sat up.


    ��Yes, I understand you��ve been through a lot. Now, rest. I��ll handle the rest.��


    ��Yes, Ise. Listen to your father. Come with me.��


    ��No, I can��t go just yet! Wait, there��s�� there��s a real culprit.��


    Ise shouted urgently. Her marriage wasn��t the issue right now. Now wasn��t the time to speak so calmly. But Verdic looked at Ise with pity.


    ��Wouldn��t it be better to discuss bad newster?��


    ��Yes, rest first.��


    Why are they acting like this?


    The atmosphere felt strange. Ise looked up at her parents in confusion, but Verdic and Selena still had unclear expressions.


    ��We want you to restfortably. We hope you settle down soon����


    ��What?��


    It was absurd for Ise to hear such words from parents who openly kept separate lovers, but Verdic and Selena kept talking about different matters, exchanging nces.


    ��Father, what on earth are you talking about?��


    ��Haven��t you always wanted to get married quickly?��


    That was because she was anxious about where Raymond might go. But that was all in the past. Ise couldn��t understand why her parents were pushing for marriage in this situation. It was so sudden it was bewildering.


    ��Not just me�� there was someone else who was kidnapped too. She might still be alive. We need to save her immediately.��


    ��Besides you? Ah, you mean Carynne Hare.��


    ��You knew?��


    ��Yes, Sir Zion said she disappeared with you. She��s been your maid for a while, right? Don��t worry too much. The investigators won��t bother you because of this.��


    Ise couldn��t understand why the conversation kept veering off course. But why?


    ��No, Father�� what are you talking about from a while ago?��


    ��I��ve been saying the same thing. I��m telling you to go home and do what you want because you��ve had a tough time. Why are you acting like this?��


    ��A person was kidnapped!��


    Ise��s voice rose in frustration.


    ��Another person besides me is still kidnapped! That person is Carynne! How can you talk about my wedding in this situation? A person��s life is at stake!��


    Verdic frowned as Ise raised her voice. While he spared no expense for his daughter, he wouldn��t tolerate her being disrespectful to him.


    ��Ise, what kind of tone are you taking with your father? Apologize immediately.��


    ��No, I don��t understand what you��re doing. I was kidnapped. And taken to a <i>horrible</i> ce. I was released, but that��s because another girl stayed behind for me. <i>Why aren��t you listening to me?��</i>


    From beginning to end, Verdic was simply relieved that his daughter was alive��he wasn��t listening to her words. Why was he in such a hurry to marry her off?


    ��Ah�� I see.��


    It was only then that Ise realized the reason andughed hollowly.


    ��So�� you think something happened to me����


    * * *


    ��We need to marry her off quickly before rumors of the kidnapping spread.��


    Verdic and Selena had agreed on this.


    Ise had been kidnapped for a full day. They had to prevent that fact from bing known at all costs. If they hurried her marriage to Zion Electra, unnecessary rumors would be avoided.


    The two had often appeared together in high society as a pair. Verdic had originally nned to separate them once Ise was reasonably satisfied, but circumstances had changed.


    An unmarried woman had been missing for over a day, found on the brink of death, and then rescued.


    If people learned about this, it was obvious what kind of stories would circte. Although the doctor had said there were no signs of assault, once rumors spread, the truth would be buried, and the focus would be on tarnishing her reputation.


    ��Dear.��


    ��It can��t be helped.��


    The couple found themselves in rare agreement. They decided to act as if they were amodating Ise��s wishes and marry her off quickly. Zion wasn��t as ideal as Raymond, but he wasn��t a bad choice. Any of Zion��s shorings could bepensated for with money.


    Verdic, seeing Zion nervously pacing near Ise��s room, spoke up.


    ��I will allow you to marry my daughter.��


    ��Pardon?��


    ��I won��t ask twice. Will you marry her?��


    Zion looked slightly bewildered but gave the expected answer.


    ��If Miss Ise agrees, I would be grateful.��


    ��Good.��


    Verdic looked down at the young knight.


    The marriage must happen as soon as possible, and all this must be buried. As far as anyone was concerned, Ise had never been kidnapped.


    * * *


    ��I wasn��t harmed. Are you satisfied? There was a girl who took my ce.��


    ��Ise!��


    Ise raised her hand to cover her eyes.


    She loved her father. She respected him. She didn��t deny that everything she had was thanks to him. But Ise, despite being warmly dressed, felt her body grow colder at seeing this side of her father.


    ��Father, you have ties with Crown Prince Gueuze, don��t you?��


    Ise remembered that Verdic had connections with the royal family. Verdic never went into details with her, but he often boasted about his business dealings during meals. She recalled that he had bragged about his connections with Crown Prince Gueuze.


    ��Crown Prince Gueuze kidnapped Carynne and me. Because we witnessed something.��


    ��Selena, please check if there��s anyone outside the door.��


    Selena quietly got up, checked outside, and securely locked the door.


    ��There��s no one.��


    ��Good.��


    Verdic took Ise��s hand. She looked down at her forcibly held hand and listened to him.


    ��How did you get involved in such a dangerous situation?��


    ��Carynne and I went for a walk and ventured too far. We witnessed people disposing of bodies�� we were captured and woke up in the pce dungeon.��


    She felt nauseous.


    ��Carynne begged to stay behind in my ce, so that man would let me go. But he didn��t actually release me. He and his men tried to <i>kill</i> me.��


    ��Crown Prince Gueuze wouldn��t do that. The attendant must have misunderstood. It was just an ident.��


    ��Do you really believe that?��


    ��Yes.��


    Verdic wasn��t surprised. He simply denied it. Crown Prince Gueuze wouldn��t do that? His daughter was kidnapped and returned, and it was just an ident? That wasn��t an ident. Ise couldn��t understand. An ident? She had been kidnapped and returned, yet her father was dismissing it as a mere ident?


    It took Ise a moment to understand.


    When Verdic said Crown Prince Gueuze wouldn��t do that, he didn��t mean he wasn��t capable of it. He meant he wouldn��t do that to his daughter, Ise.


    ����Father, you�� you knew?��


    ��Royalty often have�� peculiar hobbies����


    For the first time in her life, Ise felt disgust towards her father.

 Chapter 248

    Chapter 248


    Just as Ise was about to say more to Verdic, he spoke first, intentionally cutting off the conversation.


    ��This won��t do.��


    Ise stared at her father, stunned by his reprimand, but Verdic pressed on more sternly.


    ��We��ll have to postpone your marriage to Zion Electra. As you said, you��re not ready for marriage.��


    ��Father, that��s not the issue right now.��


    Ignoring Ise��s words, Verdic continued.


    ��Ise, you��re grounded indefinitely. Whether it��s for one year or two, you won��t leave until youe to your senses.��


    ��What? Years?��


    ��Yes. Return to the main house immediately and reflect on your mistakes.��Ise felt her heart drop. Not for days, but for years? This was practically imprisonment. She was so shocked that she questioned him. The joy of their reunion had vanished in the blink of an eye.


    ��What did I do wrong?��


    ��Leaving the house was your mistake! If you hadn��t gone out on your own, none of this would have happened.��


    ��What?��


    Verdic was treating the entire incident as a mere runaway episode. He turned to his wife.


    ��Selena, it would be best if you stayed with Ise for a while. I��ll need to visit His Highness Gueuze and apologize with a gift for the inconvenience.��


    ��That man is a lunatic!��


    ��Be quiet! You must have misunderstood. Where did you get such nonsense?��


    Verdic almost smashed a vase nearby, but he restrained himself. His arm muscles tensed as he desperately gathered his remaining self-control.


    ��Ise, you�� you misunderstood. His Highness would never do such a thing. Do you know how much money I��ve given him? He would never kidnap and kill my daughter, not even by ident. A room full of corpses? You must be mistaken�� Selena, please.��


    ��Alright. Ise, let��s leave tomorrow.��


    ��Father!��


    ��I��m leaving now.��


    <i>Bang!</i>


    Verdic mmed the door as he left.


    ����My God. Mother, what is Father thinking?��


    Ise looked nkly at the closed door, utterly incredulous. She knew her father wasn��t a good person. She suspected that many people had died because of Verdic.


    But she had always thought those matters were distant from her. She hadn��t considered them worth worrying about.


    However, experiencing it firsthand was on an entirely different level from her vague suspicions.


    Ise felt extremely ufortable with her father��s selfishness directed at her. Verdic wasn��t even trying to listen to her. The main reason she had run away wasn��t just because of Raymond. It was also her father��s oppressive attitude that suffocated her.


    The brief semnce of family unity had quickly dissipated into reality.


    ��We��ve got no choice, Ise. It��s dangerous to be involved with the royal family. Never speak of this again.��


    ����But, Carynne Hare�� because of me.��


    ��There��s nothing that can be done. Forget about it. I��ll ensure her father receives amplepensation. Lord Hare will see his domain flourish like never before.��


    They would repay her family with money. But her family would never know why they received suchpensation. Ise doubted Verdic would actually make good on his promise. Her father was not one to make amends without taking credit. It would be a miracle if the Hare domain didn��t fall into ruin.


    ��Do you really think Father would do that?��


    ��If your father doesn��t, I will ensure it myself. This is a promise between women. But�� we must distance ourselves from this matter now.��


    ����Compensation? Mother, would you have eptedpensation from His Highness if I had died?��


    ��Drop the sarcasm, please. There��s a limit to what we can do. This is as far as we can go.��


    <i>But someone had been kidnapped. The Crown Prince of this country is a serial killer. How could you just cover this up?</i>


    Ise still felt her throat tightening up. And the bodies, the bodies, the <i>endless bodies</i> hanging on the wall. She was supposed to be one of them. Carynne might be hanging there now.


    ��Ise, you heard your father say he was going to see His Highness the Crown Prince Gueuze, didn��t you?��


    Selena held her daughter and defended her husband.


    ��Your father is naturally upset that you almost died. But he can��t express his anger to His Highness. He��s royalty. We need to offer him gifts and ask for mercy. Should we report it? To whom? Save whom? We can��t do it, Ise. We just can��t.��


    ��I almost died����


    ��We��re doing this exactly because you almost died.��


    Ise felt the grip of her mother tighten on her.


    ��We can��t lose you. We have to acknowledge that, to royalty, we��re just a source of money. Ise, we are not in a position to help anyone else right now�� We should be grateful just to have preserved your life. ept your father��s limitations.��


    Would Carynne die because of her? Ise regretted telling Carynne she woulde back to save her. Who was she to save anyone? She couldn��t even take care of herself.


    ��Please, let��s justy low����


    ��Mother����


    ��Please.��


    Tears welled up in Selena��s eyes.


    Ise found it difficult to speak further with her mother.


    But the idea of forgetting Carynne also terrified her.


    ��Carynne is pregnant.��


    The thought weighed heavily on Ise.


    It was only at night that Ise could be alone. By the next day, she would have to go down to the main house with Selena. Once she went down this time, she would be trapped at home for years. The thought sent shivers down her spine.


    She had even avoided telling Carynne about her pregnancy, burdened by the truth. This incident involving royalty felt too overwhelming for her.


    ��If I close my eyes, will it all just end?��


    Her father would do everything to protect her from Crown Prince Gueuze. Ise didn��t doubt that going down to the main house with her mother would be the safest and happiest path for her. Her parents had always given her the best.


    Even the terrifying dungeon now felt like a distant dream while lying in her plush room. If she went to the main house, she could forget everything and return to her usual life.


    ��I can��t survive anyway.��


    Carynne had also said she wouldn��t survive. She was certain she wouldn��t get out alive. If Ise could just ignore a bit of guilt, she could ensure her own safety for life.


    Crown Prince Gueuze was going to be the king of this country.


    Realizing this again sent chills through Ise��s body. It wasn��t just her��her entire family was at risk. Her father, all the businesses and wealth built up by their ancestors could be ruined.


    It made sense that Verdic was going to bow and beg to Crown Prince Gueuze. If you got kicked while walking, and it was royalty who did it, you were at fault for being in their way. You had inconvenienced them by making them lift their foot.


    Crown Prince Gueuze could pass a single unfavorablew and their umted wealth would vanish instantly. Ise remembered Verdic clutching his head in agony, cursing after such events. After that, he became desperate to form connections with the nobility and royalty.


    ��This is my limit.��

 Chapter 249

    Chapter 249


    Maybe it was already toote. Ise wondered how quickly someone could die. If the Crown Prince decided to, he could have already killed Carynne. A full day had already passed. It was unlikely the Crown Prince would have left her unharmed.


    ��She might already be dead. If I leave tomorrow, I��ll be safe.��


    It was such a sweet temptation.


    No one knew that Carynne had disappeared with Ise. Only she knew. If she closed her eyes and followed her mother, she would be safe for the rest of her life.


    Except for her conscience. But even that would soon dull.


    Ise ced her hand on her chest. She hated that she still carried this heaviness towards Carynne.


    She shouldn��t have gotten involved. Whether Carynne was pregnant or not. Whether Carynne sacrificed herself or not. It wasn��t her concern. It wasn��t her business. She wanted to live like that.


    Ise hugged her pillow and suppressed a sob. The deeper she pondered, the more her body seemed to ache. The scratches and bruises she had began to resurface in her awareness. But this pain would soon fade.


    The feelings tormenting her would dull with time, as they always had. Like the disgust she felt for people who came to see her father. Like when she crushed the hand of a beggar grabbing her ankle. Like when she med the maids for her lost belongings.If she just buried this, like before.


    <i>Knock, knock.</i>


    ����Ack����


    Ise was startled and covered her mouth with her hand. When she turned her head, she almost fainted again. There was a hand outside the window, knocking.


    ����Sir Zion?��


    ��Ise, could you open the window?��


    It was Zion Electra. Ise approached the window and unlocked thetch. Zion entered, shaking off his rain-soaked hair. It was raining outside now.


    ��I apologize for the sudden visit. They wouldn��t let me meet you at all.��


    ��It��s alright. But why are you here����


    She trailed off, thinking of her father��s talk about marrying Zion. Marriage. It was not something she wanted to discuss now.


    But it could also be an escape. Zion would amodate her feelings. Unlike Raymond, he had nothing. Maybe he came to inquire about their marriage.


    ��I was worried since Miss Carynne Hare disappeared with you. Seeing you alone, I wondered if you were alright.��


    ��Did I mention that to you?��


    ��No, but I went to the Grand Cathedral, and neither of you were there. So, I figured you both went missing together. If you were in danger, she must be too. If she hasn��t been found, we should search for her.��


    ��I see�� So, you knew.��


    ��Ise?��


    ��That��s how you managed to save me.��


    ��What are you so worried about?��


    Zion knew that Carynne had been with her. And he knew that she had disappeared with Ise. Could he stay by her side forever if Ise wanted him to keep quiet? Like her father? Could he turn a blind eye to his conscience and seekfort?


    ��������


    Ise knew he wasn��t like Raymond. He wasn��t a noble, didn��t have money, and sought out wealthy women.


    But it didn��t matter what kind of man he was. What mattered most was her confidence that he would do as she wished.


    Knowing that he knew about Carynne and herself made her want to be more hypocritical. Ise looked directly at Zion and spoke.


    ��Sir Zion, swear to me. Promise you will always be on my side.��


    ��I will always be on your side.��


    Having someone who was entirely on her side gave her courage.


    ��Carynne Hare has been kidnapped by Crown Prince Gueuze. And I want to save her. Will you help me?��


    Zion Electra knelt on one knee, like a knight. He was, after all, a knight.


    ��I shall follow your will.��


    * * *


    ��Carynne�� was taken by Crown Prince Gueuze.��


    ��Miss Ise said so. But she doesn��t have any proof.��


    ��No, I believe her. She��s not one to make things up. I can roughly guess where she might be.��


    Raymond covered his mouth with a serious expression but did not seem shocked. He studied the map and dates thoughtfully before asking Zion.


    ��It��s kind of you to be so concerned. Where is Miss Ise Evans staying now?��


    ��She��s at my lodging, Sir Raymond.��


    ��It would be better to move her to Count Landon��s estate. I��ll contact him. He��s my godfather, so he will amodate us.��


    ��Should I tell them you arranged it?��


    ��No, just say it��s through your connections. It��s not entirely untrue. Let��s go with that.��


    ��Understood.��


    Raymond remained calm even after hearing the news from Zion. For someone whose lover had been kidnapped, he seemed overlyposed, though he was known to remain calm even in the face of chaos.


    Still, Zion was unsettled by how unsurprised Raymond seemed about Crown Prince Gueuze being the culprit, almost as if he had expected it.


    ��Sir Raymond, did you know about Crown Prince Gueuze?��


    Zion had heard rumors about the prince��s unsavory hobbies, but he never imagined he was capable of multiple murders. He looked at Raymond��s resolute face and asked.


    ��A bit. I mentioned it to the Marquis not long ago, but it was useless.��


    ��What do you n to do? We��re dealing with royalty, and the location is the pce. I promised Miss Ise Evans that I��d do my best, but honestly, I��m not confident.��


    Raymond looked silently at the map. His green eyes darkened.


    ��There��s only one thing we can do.��


    He drew a line on the map.


    ��We blow up the pce.��


    Zion blinked several times, looked at Raymond��s hand, then out the window and down at his shoes, realizing he was being serious. Raymond really intended to do it.


    ��Oh, I see. Then may I excuse myself from this?��


    ��I��d like to say yes, but it��s toote for that, Sir Zion.��


    ��Sir Raymond, my dream is to live a long and quiet life.��


    ��I��ll be the one doing it, so don��t worry too much.��


    Zion was incredulous and spoke to Raymond.


    ��nting explosives in the pce? If we��re caught, our entire families will be wiped out! This is outright terrorism! Shouldn��t we gather evidence and hand it over to the investigation department?��


    ��You��re an orphan.��


    ��Is that the issue right now? Is that why you��re involving me?��


    ��No. It��s because you��re the only one I can trust.��


    ��I��m not moved. I don��t want to die.��


    ��Then there��s no other choice. Even if we hand it over to the investigation department, no one will dare investigate the Crown Prince��s pce. I have to do it myself, even if it��s reckless.��


    Zion, watching Raymond respond so straightforwardly, asked cautiously.


    ��What exactly are you nning?��


    ��I��ll blow it up by myself.��


    ��������


    He had always thought Raymond was calm, but this was different.


    Raymond was calmly going insane.


    Zion had promised Ise that he would help, but he hadn��t expected such an extreme course of action. Was Sir Raymond always this reckless?


    Since introducing Carynne Hare to him, Raymond had been acting like a different person. The Raymond who Zion used to know was gone, making it hard to follow his lead.


    ��Let��s think this through, Sir Raymond. Blowing up the pce? How will you get inside? What about all the guards and people in the pce?��


    ��I can get in.��


    ��Sure, if there��s a party or you��re there to see the Crown Prince. But this is different. Besides, please don��t get angry and listen. How can we even be sure Carynne Hare is still alive?��


    ��She��s alive. I��m certain. But�� I��m more worried Carynne might cause a bigger problem.��


    ����Pardon?��

 Chapter 250

    Chapter 250


    Raymond shook his head, changing the subject.


    ��Anyway, there��s no other way but to nt explosives in the pce. The underground area is definitely connected to Crown Prince Gueuze��s room. We can��t officially investigate such an unofficial ce, and my rtionship with Carynne isn��t formal. Even if it��s extreme, this is the only method. I��ll try to keep you as uninvolved as possible, Sir Zion.��


    ��What about you, Sir Raymond?��


    ��If it doesn��t work, I��ll die. Sir Zion, don��t you think dying for love is quite romantic?��


    ��Are you nning to blow yourself up?��


    ��Not exactly, but I��m not afraid to risk my life. And this is the best way right now. Will you help me? No, do help me.��


    Zion sighed deeply while looking into Raymond��s eyes.


    If Raymond hadn��t been hurt because of him, he wouldn��t have felt so obligated to help.


    ��There��s a party that Crown Prince Gueuze will attend the day after tomorrow. I��ll ask Count Landon to prepare Miss Ise Evans for it. You should enter with her, keep an eye on the situation, and inform me about the Crown Prince��s whereabouts��when he arrives, how long he stays, and when he prepares to leave. Use the second gap in the seventh terrace, like before.����What if he doesn��t attend?��


    ��Based on past behavior, he will. He has always attended that day.��


    Raymond wrote the date on a piece of paper.


    ��People��s actions have inertia.��


    * * *


    ��Ise, we��re almost at the pce.��


    ��Y-Yes.��


    In the jolting carriage, Zion nervously adjusted his scarf. He loved attending parties, but he had never been this tense.


    Zion��s task was simple: confirm that Crown Prince Gueuze attended the party and inform Raymond how long he would stay.


    Zion pictured in his mind where the second gap in the seventh terrace was. It was a rarely used spot, secretly utilized by couples for discreet meetings. Guards often avoided that area on purpose, making it a convenient ce for Raymond and Zion to exchange messages discreetly.


    Zion checked the time and took a deep breath. While his task wasn��t significant, the gravity of what Raymond was nning made him anxious.


    ��I��ll nt small bombs in various locations. While the chaos and distraction spread, we��ll extract Carynne.��


    ��Hopefully, we��ll seed in one go and seed in rescuing her.��


    Let��s hope so.


    No one wanted this incident to escte beyond a small explosion. Zion��s hope was to rescue Carynne safely, then have Raymond and Carynne disappear to live quietly on Raymond��s estate, while he and Ise returned to their lives in their own domains.


    ��D-Don��t tremble.��


    ��I am not trembling, Ise.��


    Ise��s face was pale. Although her dark green dress was quite expensive, it seemed ufortable. It was borrowed from Countess Landon since Ise had left home with nothing. The fit was slightly off in the chest and sleeves.


    More than anything, Ise��s excessively stiff expression created a stark contrast.


    ��I-I am. Not, not t-trembling�� o-or am I?��


    ��Yes.��


    Despite frequenting social gatherings, this was her first royal ball, and she was evidently nervous. The debutante ball in the pce marked the true beginning of one��s social debut, so high society would think she was only now properly entering the social scene.


    And more than any other nobles or famous people, Crown Prince Gueuze would see Ise. If he knew that the one who escaped him was attending the party, he wouldn��t let her go.


    ��It��s dangerous.��


    ��I know. But you can��t hold His Highness��s attention alone. You need to act when everyone��s eyes are on Miss Ise.��


    ��It��s only been a day since Miss Evans was kidnapped.��


    ��Of course, if she refuses, I won��t ask any further.��


    Zion didn��t like it at all. Ise was the prey that had slipped through the Crown Prince��s fingers once. What would he do when he saw her? Zion fully expected Ise to refuse to attend.


    But contrary to his expectations, Ise agreed to go to the party.


    ��Even though she��s trembling so much.��


    Zion disliked how people around him seemed to get too involved because of Carynne Hare. Perhaps because he had always relied on his looks to get by, Zion disliked people who were like him. From the moment he was introduced to Carynne, he had recognized her as one of his kind, and she made him uneasy.


    It seemed like his mentor had started to falter after meeting her, and he didn��t like her presence next to Ise, who he was currently focused on. Even though he was participating because of Ise and Raymond, Zion resented Carynne for relying on her looks to gain favor.


    Should so many people risk themselves for one woman? Zion didn��t think so.


    ��Ise, I still think�� I don��t want you to be in danger. Just informing us of Miss Carynne��s whereabouts was enough.��


    ��N-No�� it��s because we have to, d-deal with, with His Highness the C-Crown Prince����


    Despite her trembling, Ise continued to fix her makeup and check the heels of her shoes.


    ��My father and mother want to hide me from H-His Highness, but they know it��s useless�� It��s better to show my face�� If Carynne manages to escape, I��ll be the first to face his wrath.��


    ��That makes sense.��


    Ise seemed to be stabilizing as she checked her rings and ne. The saying that a woman��s essories are her weapons seemed true in her case.


    While adjusting the angle of her ne like a knight preparing for battle, she said,


    ��It��s better to be in the pce, pretending to be unrted to this matter. Even if there are suspicions, it might lessen the danger. When things go wrong, I��ll scream and pretend to faint.��


    The logic was sound, but she was still willingly walking into the lion��s den. Zion wanted to click his tongue but found himself admiring her bravery.


    ����Ise, I kind of wish you had been born a man.��


    ��What? No way.��


    ����Right.��


    Zion extended his hand to Ise. She took it and stood up. As they walked together, Ise looked at the distant pce.


    ��By the way, Sir Zion, I always wanted to be a knight.��


    ��It��s not a great job.��


    ��Not as a job, but like in stories. Protecting the weak and upholding justice�� I know it��s not possible in reality, and I can��t live like that, so I wanted to marry a knight.��


    Ise smiled slightly despite her tense face.


    ��But it��s more thrilling to do it myself.��


    ��Then let��s go uphold justice.��


    ��Yes.��


    They were going to rescue someone captured by a viin. Just like knights.


    Even though the one they were rescuing wasn��t a princess but a country girl. And even though they weren��t particrly close.

 Chapter 251

    Chapter 251


    Raymond entered the pce. As he approached the gate, the captain of the royal guard recognized him.


    ��Sir Raymond, it��s been a while.��


    ��Yes. It looks like you��re busy with the banquet.��


    ��Indeed, sir. Are you attending?��


    ��Hmm, I have a brief matter to discuss with His Highness, Prince Lewis.��


    ��I understand. Please, go right in.��


    ��Thank you. You seem busy, so there��s no need to escort me.��


    ��Oh, thank you, sir. I��ll take my leave then.��


    Inside the pce, countless servants were moving about constantly, but slipping past them unnoticed was not difficult for him. A few maids recognized him as he passed through the halls, but they quickly turned their attention back to their duties.As Raymond had frequently visited the pce as the prince��s shooting instructor, no one paid any attention when he headed towards the quarters of Prince Loius and Crown Prince Gueuze, rather than the central pce where the banquet was being held. The crown prince often sought Raymond out.


    Crown Prince Gueuze was not much of a father, and the other instructors were quite old, so Prince Lewis often wished to treat Raymond more like a cherished vassal or an older brother than a teacher.


    During a lesson, while handling a gun, Prince Lewis had asked Raymond,


    ��Will I find such things amusing when I get older?��


    Raymond, trying to ignore the musicing from the pce, replied to the prince,


    ��I myself don��t find it particrly enjoyable.��


    Prince Lewis was a different kind of personpared to Crown Prince Gueuze. Perhaps it was because he was still young, but he resembled his grandfather and the elder statesmen who served as his mentors, like his godfather, Marquis Penceir, more than he did Crown Prince Gueuze. Perhaps that was why Crown Prince Gueuze despised Prince Lewis so much.


    Banquets were frequently held in the pce. Crown Prince Gueuze only attended when he felt like it, and when he did, the atmosphere often turned into a decadent party. There would be loud arguments, high-stakes gambling, and eventually, women disguised as maids would be brought in from outside the pce.


    The old king no longer had the energy to interfere with the debauchery that Crown Prince Gueuze conducted within the very walls of the royal pce.


    ��He will definitely attend today.��


    Raymond remembered the countless times when Crown Prince Gueuze had attended. If that was the case, he would attend this time as well.


    The dark basement that Ise had mentioned��the room filled with hanging corpses��was certainly connected to Crown Prince Gueuze��s quarters. Carynne would be there. She had to be there. Still alive.


    Zion had mentioned the possibility that she was already dead, but that was not something Raymond was willing to consider right now.


    If Carynne were dead, Raymond would quickly follow her by taking his own life. She would want that too. Raymond was now weary of living in a world without her. He had gathered all the information he needed.


    Now, he had to proceed on the assumption that Carynne was still alive.


    As Raymond walked, whenever he was out of sight, he discreetly ced small bombs in the corridors or gardens. They were set to explode automatically after a certain time.


    The noise they would make was loud enough to distract people, and some were designed to explode like fireworks. If a small fire broke out, it would be even better.


    Since there was no official announcement on Carynne��s kidnapping, if he could rescue her and hide her within his own household, Crown Prince Gueuze would no longer be able to touch her. Raymond resolved to hide Carynne even more deeply than before.


    <i>I told you so.</i>


    In this life, Carynne had been too ambitious. She wanted to escape to the outside world. The moment she realized that the ce she had been living in was not a novel, she made great efforts once more. But those efforts had not borne fruit.


    As expected, the world was too harsh, too terrifying, and too brutal for Carynne to survive. <i>Let��s return to the mansion again.</i> He would keep Carynne in her room, whisper words of love to her in bed, and that would be enough.


    Would she be unhappy with that?


    No. There��s no way that would happen. Carynne would love him. After all, she had no one else but him. They would spend a year together like that, and then another year.


    They would live together for decades, centuries, millennia, and that would be their happy ending.


    An eternal life like that would be more than enough.


    Even if something unprecedented urred, like Ise helping Carynne or the miracle of Verdic rescuing Carynne, they were ultimately outsiders, and what mattered most was just the two of them. They needed more time together. The world was all too tiresome.


    ����No one��s here.��


    Raymond stood in front of the crown prince��s door. So far, he hadn��t encountered anyone. There were too few people around.


    As he passed by, Raymond stepped out onto the terrace to check if a signal from Zion had arrived, but there was nothing.


    Had Crown Prince Gueuze not yet arrived at the banquet?


    ��I must wait.��


    The old him would have done so.


    He couldn��t afford to be uncertain. To maximize the chances of sess, he needed to be patient. Beyond that door, Crown Prince Gueuze could still be there with his men. Escaping from the pce might be impossible.


    Raymond knew he should wait until he could confirm the crown prince��s location.


    ��������


    However.


    He couldn��t bear it.


    The thought that Carynne might be beyond that door made the patience he had maintained until now vanish without a trace.


    Two days had already passed. Even in just five minutes, a skilled butcher could end a life. Beating someone��s body thoroughly wouldn��t be difficult. Raymond hoped that Carynne had acted wisely and survived. But he had failed to wait wisely.


    <i>Creak.</i>


    Raymond put his pistol inside his coat. There was still time before the first bomb was set to go off. In that case, it was better to use a de. Raymond pulled out a medium-length dagger from inside his coat.


    ��If anyone sees me, I��d be executed on the spot.��


    ��������


    There was no one in Crown Prince Gueuze��s room. But the room was slightly disordered. He had left. Had he gone to the banquet? If so, now was the chance.


    Raymond knelt on the floor and lifted the carpet. And there it was, just like before, the entrance to the passage.


    This time, it wasn��t locked. It was simply closed. Raymond lifted the door and entered.


    ��Carynne.��


    Raymond took a deep breath and stepped inside.


    Even though Zion hadn��t sent any signal from the window, he could no longer wait.


    Raymond double-checked the positions of his gun and dagger. He had reached his limit. He was tired of being apart from Carynne, and he didn��t want to see her suffer any longer.


    Even if it meant killing everyone he encountered on the way out, he would do it.


    That was better than waiting.


    * * *


    Ise moved in step with Zion. Tension filled the air. As the court musicians yed a bright waltz, a few couples danced slowly, but it was a dance meant to liven up the mood within their own groups, not one intended for mingling with others.


    Zion spoke to Ise, who looked ufortable.


    ��Are you alright?��


    ��I��m fine.��


    It was still early, and the atmosphere wasn��t too bad. Zion slowly moved with Ise, scanning the surroundings. Although it was held at the pce, this was just a regr banquet, not one for the New Year or a festival.


    The mood of this gathering was predictable. Just a wasteful, indulgent affair. A decadent, tedious event. Zion was willing to attend such parties, but since his primary interest was in older noblewomen, this wasn��t a particrly appealing banquet.


    This was a gathering mainly for men who enjoyed debauchery. In a few hours, even the few women present would likely have all left. Leaving Ise here didn��t sit well with him. But right now, what mattered wasn��t Ise��s or his own enjoyment.  /subliminalwayfarer

 Chapter 252

    Chapter 252


    ��Sir Zion, are you certain that Crown Prince Gueuze will attend?��


    ��Yes, probably����


    Zion trailed off. When Ise looked up at him expectantly, he took a step back, then closer again, continuing,


    ��His Highness usually attends as he pleases. While other sources have indicated that he will attend��.��


    Raymond had been confident, but Zion, who attended such banquets more frequently, couldn��t understand what Raymond was so sure about.


    Though it was called a banquet, it wasn��t an important day, nor was it during a festival. Not many nobles had attended��only a few young nobles who enjoyed indulgence were here and there, flirting with women.


    Would Crown Prince Gueuze attend? Zion wasn��t sure. The decorations weren��t particrly extravagant, nor were there more high-ranking nobles than usual. Of course, since Gueuze acted on a whim, there was still a chance he might attend.


    ��But today�� seems unusually tame.��


    Zion noticed the odd sense of unease he felt. Crown Prince Gueuze, despite being royalty, enjoyed turning banquet halls into depraved spaces.He liked to see people crawling on the splendid marble floors with wine spilled all over, preferred prostitutes and gigolos standing in ce of attendants, and enjoyed watching those who went bankrupt from gambling lose their dignity, then ckmailing them after standing as their guarantor.


    But today felt different.


    The wine was simply of high quality, and not too strong. The music was a lively waltz, and the drapery was bright cream-colored fabric. Early lilies were ced here and there as decorations, giving the ce more the atmosphere of a salon hosted by a noblewoman than a royal banquet attended by the likes of Gueuze.


    If he were attending, the atmosphere wouldn��t be like this. Was he really going to attend today? Zion bit his lip slightly. Seeing this, Ise looked up at him and asked,


    ��So, if he doesn��t attend, what will happen?��


    Zion frowned.


    That wouldplicate things. If that happened, Raymond might encounter Crown Prince Gueuze. And then where would Carynne Hare be?


    ��Well, then.��


    But his words were cut off. A servant��s loud announcement interrupted him.


    ��His Highness, Crown Prince Gueuze, is entering!��


    That��s a relief.


    He would need to send a signal to Sir Raymond. Once Gueuze attended, he usually stayed for a long time, enjoying watching people get drunk or be senseless.


    That would give Sir Raymond enough time to extract Carynne Hare. They just needed to confirm that Gueuze was here and stay as long as possible, keeping him upied.


    ��Greetings to Your Highness, Crown Prince Gueuze.��


    ��May the gods protect Your Highness. It is an honor to see you.��


    A few people bowed deeply and greeted Crown Prince Gueuze, but he passed them by indifferently, heading toward the seat he usually upied.


    Zion thought that his face looked somewhat different from before. The cruel expression that often mocked others seemed unusually bright today. As Gueuze slowly walked, his eyes met Ise��s.


    ��Hmm, isn��t this Ise Evans?��


    ��������


    Ise froze.


    Standing beside her, Zion gently grasped her fingers. <i>Get a hold of yourself, Ise.</i> Only then did Ise bow.


    ��Greetings, Your Highness.��


    ��Indeed, I didn��t expect <i>you</i> to attend today.��


    <i>I thought you��d be at the bottom of a river.</i>


    Even without him saying it explicitly, Ise caught the sarcastic tone. She opened her mouth. She needed to speak, to prevent any harm froming to her father and mother.


    ��Y-Your Highness, I am grateful for your boundless mercy����


    ��What did I do to deserve your thanks?��


    Crown Prince Gueuze asked this with a faint smile, looking down at Ise. She was at a loss for words. She couldn��t very well thank him for sparing her life here.


    * * *


    Raymond stood in the empty room.


    There was nothing.


    No bodies, no Carynne. Nothing.


    * * *


    At that moment, Ise heard a familiar voice.


    But it was a voice that shouldn��t be heard here.


    ��Don��t be too harsh, Your Highness. Miss Evans seems ufortable.��


    ����It��s amusing, though.��


    Btedly, the attendant announced,


    ��Miss Carynne Hare has entered!��


    Ise was taken aback. Zion��s face mirrored her shock. Both were speechless at the unexpected arrival.


    ording to the original n, Crown Prince Gueuze would be here, and while the royal attendants were focused on him, Raymond was supposed to extract Carynne.


    But why��?


    ��Miss Ise, did you get home safely that day?��


    ��������


    ��Is Carynne not asking you a question?��


    ��Y-Yes�� Yes, Your Highness.��


    ��I wasn��t the one who asked.��


    ��I-I��m sorry, Your Highness. Thanks to you�� Yes, um, I got home safely, Carynne.��


    Why was Carynne standing so naturally beside Crown Prince Gueuze?


    Ise was panicked, nearly in a state of shock as she realized the n had gone awry.


    Zion Electra was the first to grasp the situation. It seemed that Carynne Hare had sessfully charmed Crown Prince Gueuze.


    <i>She��s really good at ensuring her own survival</i>, Zion thought with a click of his tongue. At least she wasn��t dead or injured, which was a relief.


    ording to Ise, Crown Prince Gueuze was a man with an excessive desire for destruction when it came to the human body. If that were true, Carynne would have been more likely buried beneath the pce garden by now.


    Yet here Carynne was, standing beside Crown Prince Gueuze, smiling brilliantly in a way that outshone even the most beautiful people here. Ise, who hade to rescue her, now looked more pitiful inparison.


    The dress Carynne wore was excessively luxurious for a girl not yet twenty. Her dress was intricately embroidered with gold, and her hair and neck were adorned with various jewels, including diamonds, amethysts, and rubies.


    Only now did Zion understand why the atmosphere at today��s banquet felt different from before.


    Crown Prince Gueuze hadn��t held this banquet to watch people��s disgraceful behavior as he usually did��


    But to showcase his young mistress.


    Carynne��s face was as radiant as could be. Her rosy lips curved into a smile as her soft, melodious voice filled the air.


    ��Yes. I was worried because it was sote, Ise.��


    ��C-Carynne�� Are you alright?��


    ��Why wouldn��t I be alright? His Highness Gueuze has been taking such good care of me.��


    Zion had considered the possibility that Carynne might still be alive, but he hadn��t expected her to be standing sofortably beside Crown Prince Gueuze. He was at a loss for how to adjust their n.


    If Carynne was in such a position, her immediate safety was assured, but the chances of escaping the pce had significantly diminished.


    If she became an official mistress, her risk of death would decrease, but would that mean Carynne would continue living in the pce?


    ��What about Sir Raymond?��


    Zion bowed and quickly retreated. Since the conversation was between Ise and Carynne, stepping back seemed more respectful. This was the perfect time, as Crown Prince Gueuze��s attention was focused on Ise.


    Zion discreetly slipped a note into the seventh terrace.


    <b>[ G-I, C, apanied ]</b>


    He hoped Raymond hadn��t gone in prematurely and fallen into a trap.


    Zion bit his lip as he left. The fact that Carynne was by Crown Prince Gueuze��s side made him uneasy.


    The situation was unfolding in a way they hadn��t anticipated at all.  /subliminalwayfarer

 Chapter 253

    Chapter 253


    Raymond stood in the empty room.


    There was no one. Carynne was supposed to be in this room. Not only that, but there should have been countless bodies hanging here as well.


    But there was nothing.


    Why?


    He was confused, but knowing that nothing was here meant he no longer had any reason to stay. Raymond quickly scanned the room and stepped out.


    Raymond exited Crown Prince Gueuze��s secret chamber. He had been relieved it wasn��t locked, but that wasn��t the point. It hadn��t been necessary to lock it in the first ce. So where could Carynne be now?


    First, he needed to get out of the room. Raymond carefully restored the room to its original state and stood up. He needed to think.


    Raymond left the room. Or rather, he tried to.


    ��Sir Raymond?��<i>Damn it.</i>


    Why had that boy shown up here?


    ����Greetings, Your Highness, Prince Lewis.��


    Of all people, why did it have to be Prince Lewis?


    Raymond cursed inwardly. Prince Lewis was looking up at him, questioning him. Unfortunately, he had caught Raymonding out of the room. Raymond didn��t want to confront this boy.


    Prince Lewis would never be king.


    Raymond had experienced countless futures. He had lived through the aftermath of Carynne��s death as well. So many lives had passed since then. Although there were slight differences, the hundred lives in which Carynne died were always simr. Even in the five lives where he particrly retained memories of the past, it was the same.


    Prince Lewis would never, ever be king.


    Thus, he could never be important to Raymond. Not long after Carynne��s death, Crown Prince Gueuze would kill his own son and take the throne.


    And after some time, Marquis Penceir would kill Crown Prince Gueuze and take the throne. The son of Marquis Penceir would be the next king, and the defense of the borders, once managed by Marquis Penceir, would weaken, leading to endless conflicts.


    In Raymond��s decades, centuries, and millennia of life, Prince Lewis had little impact. Raymond used to enjoy showingpassion, but those feelings had long been swept away by time.


    This boy would always and forever remain a boy, and Raymond no longer felt guilt.


    Thus, he had chosen to focus on Crown Prince Gueuze over Prince Lewis. Even though Gueuze was vile and disgusting, it was simply easier to deal with him in a businesslike manner for the sake of his goals. Knowing that Gueuze��s life wouldn��t be long helped him endure. Just as he had given up on his older brother, he had given up on Prince Lewis as well.


    ��What brings you here, Sir Raymond? This is my father��s room. There��s no lesson today, is there?��


    Prince Lewis asked, but his expression was more usatory than curious. Raymond thought about the dagger hidden in his coat. If it came to it, killing Prince Lewis and escaping might be the best option.


    ����Your Highness.��


    Raymond nced outside the room. There was no one there. Prince Lewis had entered the room alone, without an attendant. Killing him wouldn��t be a problem. Prince Lewis would die at a mere gesture from Raymond. Kill him quickly and then find Carynne.


    Raymond looked at Prince Lewis��s white, slender neck. It reminded him of a fledgling deer. His eyes were gentle, and he didn��t suspect for a moment that Raymond might harm him. It would be quick. After all, he was destined to die soon anyway.


    ��In fact, I have something to tell you. Come closer.��


    ��What is it?��


    Raymond stared at Prince Lewis��s neck. He seemed slightly frightened. Perhaps Raymond was imagining it because he felt that way himself.


    ��I want you to do what <i>you</i> love.��


    At that moment, Carynne��s voice filled Raymond��s mind.


    Carynne didn��t fully understand how broken Raymond had be. What Raymond had revealed to Carynne was just a small part of it. Even with that, Carynne had been saddened. She had pushed herself so hard because she thought Raymond was doing things he didn��t want to do because of her.


    She had tried to befriend Ise, to forgive Verdic, and to pay attention to her own family. Raymond, thinking her efforts were in vain, still went along with them.


    Raymond thought he had reached his limit, but seeing the young Prince Lewis, who reminded him of his once pure past, made him want to follow her words.


    * * *


    ��Sir Raymond?��


    ����Your Highness.��


    Raymond looked at Prince Lewis. He could snap his neck and kill him instantly. Prince Lewis had seen him, and not just anywhere, buting out of Crown Prince Gueuze��s room.


    If this got out, especially to Crown Prince Gueuze, it would be the end for Raymond. Even if it only reached Marquis Penceir, his life could still be in danger. In the past, he had done more work for Marquis Penceir, but not in this life.


    He was confused. Killing Prince Lewis and escaping might be the best option, but it wasn��t what Carynne would want. Raymond didn��t want to do it either. He staggered as he took a step forward.


    Where could Carynne be? Even thinking about it was exhausting and overwhelming. He just wanted to stop thinking and be by her side.


    ��Sir Raymond! Where are you going? My father is attending the banquet right now, so why were you in his room?��


    ��Your Highness, I don��t know.��


    Raymond continued walking. Where should he go now? Why wasn��t Carynne in the basement? Had Crown Prince Gueuze already killed her? Or taken her elsewhere? Raymond kept walking. Where�� Where should he go first? What should he do?


    ��Sir Raymond?��


    ��Good evening�� Lady Elva.��


    ��I didn��t expect to see you today, Sir.��


    It was a familiar face. This made it even harder to kill everyone he encountered. With the arrival of Lady Elva, Prince Lewis��s attention was diverted from Raymond.


    Raymond greeted Lady Elva and quickly grabbed one of the bombs he had nted earlier. He needed to remove it.


    ��What��s that?��


    ��It��s nothing. Just something I dropped earlier. It��s a bit dangerous, so I��d suggest you step back.��


    ��Oh my, you should be more careful. Even if it��s military equipment, if something serious happens, you could be executed.��


    ��Thank you for the wise advice.��


    Raymond was slightly shocked by his own actions. Even in this situation, he was thinking about removing the bomb. He gave a bitter smile. Lady Elva quickly turned her attention from him and warmly greeted Prince Lewis, who was standing behind him.


    ��Oh my, Your Highness Lewis. It��s been a while.��


    ��Hello, Lady Elva. How is Lady Lianne?��


    ��She��s been wanting to see you so much, Your Highness. But she didn��te today.��


    ��To attend the banquet?��


    ��Yes. This isn��t really a ce for Lianne. I won��t be staying long myself.��


    ��Alright, I��m thinking of hosting a tea party soon, so it would be nice to see Lianne there.��


    ��I��m very much looking forward to it.��


    Lady Elva and Prince Lewis exchanged light conversation. Raymond turned away and walked as he pulled out a few notes from his coat that Zion had left behind. There were three. They had been ced at regr intervals ording to the time.


    Two of the notes were nk. From the time Zion was supposed to enter until the attendant had circled the area twice, Crown Prince Gueuze had not arrived. Thest note had visible writing on it, even while folded.


    As he had expected, Crown Prince Gueuze had arrived a bitte, so he was likely still in the banquet hall. Raymond unfolded the paper.


    ��Lady Elva doesn��t usually attend the banquets hosted by my father.��


    ��I heard this one might be a little different.��


    ��What��s different?��


    ��Well�� it seems that����


    Lady Elva hesitated to speak to Prince Lewis, but he urged her to continue.


    ��It��s alright, go ahead.��


    ��He��s nning to introduce someone new to everyone.��


    ����A woman, then. Do you think she might be my new stepmother?��


    ��I don��t think so. She��s still young and doesn��te from a significant family.��


    ��Who is she?��


    ��Do you know Carynne Hare?��


    Prince Lewis shook his head.


    Raymond was grateful that his back was turned.  /subliminalwayfarer

 Chapter 254

    Chapter 254


    ��What the hell is going on?!��


    ��Shh, Ise. Calm down.��


    Zion ced a finger over Ise��s lips. The ce they were in was often used for discreet meetings between men and women, but raising their voices here wasn��t a wise choice. Despite its grandeur, they were still deep in enemy territory. They needed to stay unnoticed.


    But Ise grabbed Zion��s finger and pulled it away from her lips. As her tension eased, her voice grew louder, and her fear turned into anger.


    ��Calm down? How can I calm down?! Why is Carynne there! After all the risks I took toe here, why is she <i>there?!��</i>


    ��She probably found a way to survive on her own. If she gains his favor, at least she won��t be killed immediately.��


    She had survived by gaining favor with Crown Prince Gueuze. But she had survived a little <i>too</i> well. To think she had managed to secure a position as his mistress. Carynne, standing beside Crown Prince Gueuze earlier, was dazzlingly radiant. At least for now, she didn��t seem to be in immediate danger.


    But was that really <i>fortunate?</i> Rather, the situation had be even moreplicated. How could they possibly extract someone who had be the crown prince��s mistress?


    Women who became the mistresses of royalty often followed simr steps. High-ranking nobles did the same. Thew of this country adhered strictly to monogamy, and illegitimate children were not recognized. Moreover, in this country, where religious influence was strong, an unmarried woman who caused a scandal with a man was considered disgraceful.Therefore, those in power often married their mistresses off to a subordinate or a man with little political influence, granting her a formal position.


    ��Ah, so that��s what it is?��


    Zion began to think that Carynne might be nning to escape from Crown Prince Gueuze in the same way Catherine had.


    First, she would enter the position of his mistress to appease him. However, both royal and noble mistresses were expected to be married women. If she were treated as just another corpse in the basement, it would be different, but bing his mistress changed everything.


    Zion, well-versed in society��s gossip, also knew about Catherine and Gueuze��s past. Catherine had used her legal husband as a shield to escape from Gueuze.


    If Carynne were to designate Raymond as her ��fake husband��, she might also find a way out of Gueuze��s grasp. Zion was the only one who knew about their rtionship besides the two of them. Since Raymond and Carynne��s rtionship wasn��t official, if they married, it could create an opportunity.


    ��I understand.��


    ��What?��


    ��If she bes his mistress, they��ll likely marry her off first, and she might ask for Sir Raymond to be designated as her husband. I heard that Carynne��s mother, Catherine, resolved her situation in a simr way.��


    ����What? What are you talking about?��


    ��To be a mistress, she would need to be married. The fact that she was brought out so publicly at a party suggests that he intends to make her more than just a casual amusement.��


    ��No, that��s not it��. Why did you suddenly mention Sir Raymond? Are you talking about Raymond, your superior and my former fianc��?��


    ��Ah.��


    Zion fell silent. He had made a serious slip of the tongue.


    He tried to think of an excuse, but Ise didn��t give him the chance.


    ��What rtionship does Sir Raymond have with Carynne that would make her designate him as her husband?��


    ��I misspoke. Of course, I didn��t mean him��.��


    ��Then why did you mention Sir Raymond?��


    ��Well��.��


    He wasn��t ready to tell Ise yet. She had once admired Raymond, but she didn��t know about his rtionship with Carynne. If Ise found out about their connection, it would undoubtedly cause trouble for Carynne, which was why Raymond had ordered Zion to keep it a secret.


    ��The important thing right now isn��t that��.��


    ��No, don��t change the subject. I can��t understand why Sir Raymond��s name suddenly came up. Why would Carynne ask for him to be designated as her husband? What��s their rtionship?��


    ��I misspoke. As you know, Sir Raymond is my superior and someone I know well, so��.��


    ��Sir Zion, didn��t you promise me that we would have honest conversations to understand each other better?��


    Zion was wrought with the urge to flee. No matter what Raymond had said, this wasn��t something he should have gotten involved in. He should have just charmed Ise into staying safe at the estate, ying along and trying to please her.


    Ise��s gaze narrowed, and Zion began to sweat.


    ��It��s because I��m the father of her child.��


    The answer came from behind.


    ����What?��


    Zion looked at his superior with a face on the verge of tears. Raymond entered the balcony space where Zion and Ise were standing, wearing a bitter smile.


    ��It��s been a while, Ise. I��m sorry once again for how things have turned out.��


    It was the moment when a secret that had been kept hidden was finally revealed.


    Zion had learned through Ise that Carynne might be pregnant. After wrestling with the thought, he had no choice but to confront Raymond just before he was about to move with the explosives. He had asked how involved he was with Miss Carynne Hare and mentioned that she might be pregnant.


    Raymond confessed calmly to the ring Ise.


    ��Carynne and I are together.��


    Ise felt like she had been hit in the back of the head.


    ��So�� you were with a woman you weren��t even married to�� Sir Raymond��?��


    ��That��s right. The burden of having to take responsibility for Carynne made me cut off contact with her.��


    Raymond answered without hesitation.


    ��As I told you before, I found that I was popr with people. After that, I realized how foolish it was to be tied to just one woman.��


    ����So that��s why Carynne never mentioned anything about a man to me����


    ��Of course, our rtionship wasn��t serious. Why would I tie myself down to just one woman?��


    So in the end, he was saying he had just met her briefly and left. If Ise had a gun, she might have shot Raymond right then and there. She continued questioning Raymond in a low, simmering voice.


    ����When did you find out Carynne was pregnant?��


    ��Sir Zion informed me when he reported Miss Carynne Hare��s disappearance.��


    Even Zion thought it wasmendable how Raymond was trying to prevent Ise��s anger from turning on Carynne.


    This was the moment when all the time Zion had spent lying about Raymond��s supposed promiscuity finally paid off.


    Raymond now appeared as the ultimate scoundrel who not only slept with his ex-fianc��e��s friend but also got her pregnant and then ran away from her.


    ��Bastard.��


    Ise red at Raymond with icy blue eyes, filled with contempt. She cursed him inwardly. She began to understand why Carynne had tried so hard to stay close to her.


    She could see why Carynne had acted as a maid, staying by her side, why she hadn��t returned home but instead volunteered at the Grand Cathedral, trying to make a good impression on everyone.


    Given the situation, it made sense that Carynne had probably lost her mind, perhaps even convincing herself that she wasn��t pregnant, that she was infertile. But her instincts had driven her to find a ce to stay.


    For the first time, Ise began to truly understand and sympathize with Carynne. She realized how harsh the world could be to a ��discarded woman�� in this ce. Carynne had probably done everything to appease and please Ise just to survive.


    And all of Carynne��s suffering was because of this man.


    Sir Raymond Saytes.


    A scoundrel with a pretty face.


    In the end, both Ise and Carynne were suffering because of him. Ise had to restrain herself from pushing Raymond off the terrace.


    ����But why are you here now? I don��t understand why someone who��s iming to be such a scoundrel is standing here. Why is someone who acted so irresponsibly suddenly here?��


    As Ise looked at him with cold eyes, Raymond pointed at Zion.


    ��Because Sir Zion Electra, standing beside you, convinced me. I didn��t want to sacrifice myself for a woman I had only met briefly. I thought living that way was foolish. But Sir Zion persuaded me, and he told me your story.��


    Raymond then knelt on one knee in front of Ise, who was ring at him with displeasure.


    ��You came all the way here for Carynne. Seeing your courage and Sir Zion��s efforts on behalf of Carynne Hare made me reconsider my sins. I realized that I could no longer run away. I learned that I cannot escape. Now, I kneel before you and ask for your help.��


    His words were sincere.


    ��Please, help me, Ise Evans.��  /subliminalwayfarer


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 Chapter 255

    Chapter 255


    Ise returned to the banquet hall.


    ��I understand. But after this is over, I don��t want to see you again.��


    ��Yes.��


    ��Never at all.��


    How would things turn out? If Carynne, as Zion had suggested, were to cleverly name Sir Raymond as her husband, would that make things go smoothly?


    ��Ise, but�� is there something we need to be doing right now?��


    ��Just stay put, Sir Zion. I don��t think Carynne will name Sir Raymond.��


    ��Why not? If Carynne just names Sir Raymond, like her mother did with Lord Hare, it would all be over.��


    ��There��s no way that��ll happen.��Ise immediately dismissed Zion��s spection.


    It was impossible. No matter how much people criticized Raymond for being reckless and indulgent, his public value was still significant. He was a famous soldier admired by Prince Lewis, a war hero, and young and handsome to top it off.


    ��Even if Carynne requests it, there��s no way Crown Prince Gueuze would allow it. It would only make him doubt Carynne��s true intentions.��


    ����Yes, I wasn��t thinking straight. Then, what do you think, Miss Ise?��


    ��Sir Raymond asked me for help because�� I think Carynne is more likely to name <i>you</i> as her husband.��


    <i>����Me?��</i>


    Zion looked baffled as he pointed to himself. Why would Carynne choose him? Their rtionship was not exactly good��in fact, it leaned more toward the negative. So why would she name him as her husband?


    ��That��s right. It��s the position of a mistress��s husband, so they wouldn��t let her choose a man she��s close to or someone of high value. A man with little status, someone already interested in another woman, would be a better choice. They need someone Crown Prince Gueuze would approve of, and <i>you</i> fit the bill perfectly.��


    Zion rubbed the back of his neck.


    He understood. If Carynne was thinking strategically, she would never choose Raymond. From what Ise said, it was clear Carynne would think the same. Zion had been too narrow in his assumptions because of Raymond and Carynne��s rtionship.


    ��Hmm, I guess I��d better prepare for a proposal then��. But why did Sir Raymond ask you instead of me? I would��ve understood if he��d just told me. I don��t see why he dragged you into this dangerous n.��


    As Zion grumbled, Ise covered her mouth with her fan and looked at him.


    ��Because this n obviously needed my approval.��


    ��Ah. Um, yes����


    ��Are you unhappy with that?��


    Of course not. Zion resigned himself to serving his master willingly. Having no choice was just part of the deal.


    * * *


    But Carynne didn��t choose Zion. Nor did she choose Raymond.


    With a gentle smile at Crown Prince Gueuze, Carynne calmly made her request for a husband.


    ��Dun Roid would be best, Your Highness.��


    * * *


    Dun Roid hade to the capital for one purpose: to drug Carynne Hare.


    When Carynne had been at the Hare estate, the manor��s servants or maids had regrly given her contraceptives in advance, but after she left the estate, ording to Nancy and the lord, Carynne had likely stopped taking them.


    Her bing pregnant was not part of his n.


    <i></i>


    <b>[ There is a man I would like to introduce to you. ]</b>


    In the letter she had sent to the fief lord, she mentioned only that there was someone she wanted to introduce. She hadn��t provided any names or descriptions.


    Dun wanted to see for himself. If this wasn��t her first life, she would��ve considered many variables in making her choice.


    Which man had she chosen?


    He was curious, but at the same time, he thought it didn��t really matter. Whoever it was had nothing to do with him.


    Carynne had lived long enough to have opportunities to catch any man she wanted. With her beauty, it wouldn��t have been difficult. No matter whom she chose, the end result would be the same. A rich man, a handsome man, a famous man��it didn��t matter.


    It doesn��t matter who it is.


    What��s important is his own task. He would not let Carynne Hare be pregnant. Never.


    There was no such thing as a beautiful ending. Endings, by their very nature, be dreadful. The story does not need a conclusion.


    She does not need a child.


    There is no need for an end.


    * * *


    Dun had spent a long time at the abbey, and since he was a priest, staying at the grand cathedral wasn��t difficult for him. When he arrived at the cathedral, the vicar greeted him warmly. Even the bishop himself summoned Dun for a meeting.


    ��It��s a great help to have you here at such a time, Reverend Dun.��


    ��I-I��m just d to be of service�� even with my limited abilities.��


    ��You��re really of great help. The capital is always short of hands. Truly�� if any priestes to assist, we��d be grateful, but to have someone from the Alburn Abbey��well, we��re deeply thankful.��


    Doctors were weed everywhere. Private hospitals charged exorbitant fees for treatment and medicine, and the country��s public hospitals were few and far between.


    The royal family demanded that the cathedral carry out relief activities, but as in any era or country, the government��s budget was alwayscking. Especially for medical services aimed at the poor, resources were even scarcer��there weren��t enough medicines, nor enough staff.


    In such a situation, Dun��s visit was a great relief for the people at the grand cathedral.


    ��Has the abbot of the Alburn Abbey been doing well?��


    ��Y-Yes�� He is well.��


    ��The abbot mentioned that he was sorry to see you interrupt your studies. So, is your presence here for the medical symposium, to continue your studies for a while?��


    ��T-That��s right. Lord Hare is still in good health.��


    The vicar had heard about Dun��s academic dedication from the abbot and was secretly hoping that Dun would continue down that path.


    Though the lord of a small estate wasn��t of much interest to the vicar, a priest who pursued the study of medicine was another matter. Moreover, Dun had been a top student for nine consecutive years.


    ��You can always inherit the estate when you��re older.��


    ��I��m still�� considering it.��


    As expected, Dun��s habit of stammering and his inability to make eye contact seemed more suited to the life of a schr than a ruler of an estate.


    So, when Dun had announced his decision to halt his studies, the abbot, the prior, and other priests had all shaken their heads in disappointment.


    ��I see. By the way, Lord Hare��s daughter is staying here, isn��t she? Wasn��t there talk of an engagement between you and Miss Carynne?��


    ����Yes.��


    The vicar nodded knowingly.


    ��Ah, but����


    ��It��s not that kind of broken engagement, I-I assure you. But if word got out�� it would be ufortable, so please keep it a secret. I wish to remain unnoticed.��


    Dun didn��t appreciate the way the vicar looked at him, as though he were some poor man who had been jilted. He hadn��t seen Carynne since they were children. Was it four years ago when hest saw her? Back then, Carynne had been nothing more than a mad, raging child.


    He wouldn��t suddenly see her as a woman just because she��d grown older. More than anything, Dun had no desire for that.


    ��I am simply�� doing my duty as a servant of God.��


    Dun found the vicar��s sympathetic gaze ufortable. The vicar seemed to think Dun was a foolish man who couldn��t forget Carynne, chasing after her even after she had rejected him. Dun knew how the situation looked, but he couldn��t deny it, so he remained silent.


    Once he confirmed who Carynne��s partner was and administered the medicine at the right time, his task would be over.


    All he wanted was to satisfy his curiosity.


    Nothing more.  /subliminalwayfarer


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    continue reading tomorrow, everyone!

 Chapter 256

    Chapter 256


    However, it wasn��t easy to figure out who Carynne had chosen.


    Most of Carynne��s life revolved around Ise Evans. She lived in the room next to Ise��s, running small errands for her and apanying her on outings. Whether it was shopping, attending social events, or even participating in charity work at the cathedral, there was little sign of her being with any other man.


    Outside Ise Evans, the only man Carynne interacted with the most was Zion Electra, but even their rtionship didn��t seem particrly close.


    Though Carynne��s beauty drew attention, with men often trying to help or flirt with her, there wasn��t anyone she saw frequently enough to introduce to her father. Dun began to suspect that Carynne��s talk of a man was simply a pretext.


    And she had grown annoyingly beautiful.


    Her waist was slim, and her now slender body fully showed the marks of womanhood. Her skin glowed with a brilliant radiance, and even in the dark interior of the cathedral, her fiery red hair rippled and shimmered, emphasizing her graceful appearance.


    It wasn��t just her outer appearance��her demeanor was entirely different from when she was younger. Carynne��s steps were careful, her speech was soft, and a smile always lingered on her face. Before long, rumors of the dazzlingly beautiful yet graceful Carynne Hare spread throughout the grand cathedral.


    When Dun thought back to the time she had thrown hot soup in his face or tried to hang herself as a child, the sight he was facing right now felt like a miracle.


    But it was beauty without purpose. Carynne showed little interest in any man, focusing solely on attending to Ise. Carynne��s life had be that of a mere handmaiden to Ise.��Why am I even here?��


    After a month, Dun started to feel frustrated.


    Catherine, Dun, and the fief lord were all interested in which man Carynne would meet, who she would fall in love with, and whether she would have children or not. None of them cared about who her master orpanion was.


    Dun had been curious about the man in Carynne��s life, but he couldn��t care less about what clothes she and Ise were buying. He didn��t care what restaurants they visited or what operas interested them.


    His task was incredibly simple: to prevent her from having a child. To ensure that Carynne Hare lived on forever.


    But since Carynne wasn��t showing any signs of being with a man, Dun had no choice but to continue silently watching her every day, from the sidelines.


    Endlessly.


    Without exchanging a single word, without making eye contact.


    And, just as before, Dun slipped the medicine into Carynne��s meals. Everyone in the cathedral would be even more devout.


    * * *


    Then, one day, Carynne didn��t return to the cathedral��s lodgings. Dun finally realized that the day hade.


    Although it seemed as though there had been no man when he watched her, perhaps Carynne didn��t want Ise to see her with another man. Or maybe the man stayed away when Dun was around. Hadn��t Carynne��s letter to her father confirmed that she was involved with someone?


    The fact that neither Ise nor Carynne had returned to the lodgings made it clear. Both had likely gone to meet their respective men. Dun thought back to whether he had given Carynne her contraceptive. Yes, he had. Even if she spent the night with a man today, she wouldn��t get pregnant, nor would Ise, as a bonus.


    ����Absurd.��


    Dun felt uneasy, unsure why he was so bothered by something he already knew.


    He was aware that Carynne had a man, but the fact that she hadn��te home unsettled him in a strange way. And not knowing why he was so displeased made him feel even worse.


    Which man was she spending the night with?


    ����Hmph.��


    Dun confirmed that Carynne hadn��t returned and sat down in a chair, opening the scripture. Truthfully, knowing who her partner was didn��t matter to him. He hadn��t confirmed it, but that wasn��t important either.


    What mattered was ensuring she wouldn��t have children. And that had already been sufficiently handled.


    Dun had instructed the staff working at the grand cathedral on how to mix the contraceptives into the spices used in the meals. Without even realizing it, those preparing the food would make sure that no one staying at the cathedral would ever have children.


    Considering the amount of medication Carynne had ingested during her stay, it was certain that she wouldn��t conceive for at least a year.


    She won��t have a child.


    With that, his task wasplete. Whoever Carynne spent her nights with, that was none of his concern. It wasn��t important.


    Eternity was what mattered.


    To dispel the vulgar thoughts creeping into his mind, Dun turned his eyes to the scripture. The words on the page seemed to draw closer to him. His actions might be those of a heretic, but even so, the scripture was his guiding principle.


    Eternity, heresy, purity, truth��


    <b>Flee ye from the sin of fornication, for all other transgressions doeth a man outside his body, yet this sin corrupteth the cathedral within��</b>


    <b>But I say unto you, whosoever gazeth upon a woman with lust hath alreadymitted adultery with her in his heart, for the seed of iniquity is sown in secret, and the soul is stained in the sight of the Lord.</b>


    ��Damn it.��


    Of course, every verse he turned to was like this.


    It wasn��t the scripture��s fault. It was his own eyes. Realizing the state of his mind, Dun closed the book. He simply couldn��t concentrate. He pressed his hands over his eyes and sighed deeply.


    <i>����Hah.��</i>


    She��s probably asleep by now.


    Dun couldn��t suppress his thoughts any longer.


    What expression does she wear in bed? How does she call out to her partner? It must be vulgar.


    He shouldn��t care, but he couldn��t help it. He��d been preupied with her pregnancy and childbirth for over a decade, and it had shaped his thoughts. Naturally, to conceive, one had to engage in intercourse. It wasn��t strange. He wasn��t strange. If anything, it was Carynne who was filthy, engaging in such acts before marriage.


    Dun sat there, unable to sleep the entire night.


    And when she still didn��t return the next day, or the day after that��


    He began to feel that something was truly wrong.


    * * *


    Dun skipped the grand mass, iming illness, and instead made his way to the lodgings where Ise and Carynne were staying. He didn��t need to check which room was Carynne��s. It was the first ce he had checked. And he had secured a spare key long ago.


    <i>Knock, knock.</i>


    ��������


    As expected, there was no sound. She still hadn��t returned. Dun inserted the key into the lock and turned it. The old door creaked open slowly.


    Creak.


    The room was much like his own, with no significant difference. A desk, a wardrobe, and a bed. As a woman of society, there were extra clothes strewn around the wardrobe that hadn��t yet been put away.


    Dun ran his fingers over the fabric, but feeling a sense of wickedness in his actions, he stopped. It was difficult to keep from imagining the skin beneath the clothing.


    Shaking his head, he prepared to leave. It was clear that Carynne hadn��t returned. He had thought she might havee back while he was away, but after checking for the clothes she��d worn the previous day and not finding them, it was clear she hadn��t.


    Not yet.


    ��Reverend Dun, what are you doing here?��  /subliminalwayfarer


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 Chapter 257

    Chapter 257


    ����As a rtive, I�� was worried since she hasn��t returned.��


    ��This is the women��s lodging. Even as a priest, you shouldn��t be here.��


    It was one of the cathedral workers. Fortunately, the excuse seemed to work, and there were no further questions. Dun stepped back. The worker closed the door, locked it, and then proceeded to open the room next door, beginning to pack up the belongings inside.


    ��What�� a-are you doing?��


    ��The youngdy who was staying here has decided to return home. I��m packing her things. Are you going to keep watching?��


    The worker eyed Dun warily, then nced sideways at the clothing, jewelry, and other items made of gold, silver, and gemstones. If Dun hadn��t been standing there, it looked like the worker might have pocketed some of the valuables.


    ��Aren��t you going�� to pack Carynne Hare��s belongings?��


    ��Well, I��m not sure, I only heard about Miss Ise Evans returning home.��


    Dun could do nothing but stand there dumbfounded, watching as the worker packed up all of Ise��s belongings. He was confused. Where had Carynne Hare gone?Even after a day or two, it didn��t seem like anyone had touched Carynne��s belongings. Unlike with Ise, no one came to pack her things, and Carynne herself hadn��t returned.


    ��Dun, you may not know this, but young people staying here often take overnight trips.��


    When he asked the vicar, the man dismissed his concerns, saying it was likely just an overnight stay.


    Dun wasn��t sure how far he should go. Should he step back and observe, or should he raise more questions? If the head of the grand cathedral said everything was fine, it wouldn��t be appropriate for an outsider like him to interfere.


    Was it genuine concern or just curiosity? Dun didn��t even know what he wanted anymore. It wasn��t until over a weekter that he finally found out where Carynne Hare had gone.


    A weekter, someone came looking for Dun.


    ��Reverend Dun Roid?��


    ��Y-Yes�� That��s me.��


    It was a sharp-looking blonde woman. She didn��t know Dun, but Dun recognized her.


    It was Ise Evans, the woman who had lived with Carynne. The daughter of the wealthy Evans family, she was arrogant, extravagant, and had treated Carynne like a maid. She was also someone Dun found irritating, as he would inevitably be indebted to her family one day.


    However, there was no reason for Ise to seek him out now.


    ��When exactly did you start staying in the capital? It wasn��t easy tracking you down.��


    ��For a f-few weeks����


    ��If I��d known you were here, it wouldn��t have taken me so long. You must have known that Carynne and I were staying here, right?��


    ��������


    Dun felt ufortable with the way Ise questioned him, almost as if she were interrogating him. There was no reason for their first meeting to be like this. Dun wasn��t yet the fief lord of the Hare estate, and Ise wasn��t Verdic Evans.


    ��Do you really have no idea why I��m here?��


    ����I can��t t-think of anything.��


    ��Why are you here? And what about Carynne Hare?��


    Dun frowned. He had been secretly watching Carynne, but there was no way Ise could have known that. So, he felt justified in being angry.


    ����I��m here to a-attend a symposium�� And as for Carynne Hare, I haven��t spoken to her since we were children.��


    He had been observing her from afar, but it wasn��t exactly a lie��he hadn��t spoken to her directly. Still, Ise continued to scrutinize him, her expression doubtful.


    ��If that��s really the case, then it would have made more sense for her to point to Zion.��


    ��W-W-What are you talking about��?��


    ����Can��t you stop stuttering? It��s really hard to listen to you. I��m already frustrated enough, and now I have to deal with your stammering.��


    ��If you d-dislike conversing with me, you��re free to leave.��


    Dun felt ufortable around Ise, who had suddenly requested a meeting only to act irritated. As Dun pointed to the door, inviting her to leave, Ise removed her hat and ced it on the table.


    ��You can��t possibly not know that Carynne Hare is staying here. It��s strange that she pointed to someone who��s right here, and your behavior is suspicious. What��s going on?��


    <i>I wish I knew so I could just tell her to leave.</i>


    But neither Dun nor Ise was actually ready to end the conversation. Since it concerned Carynne, Dun couldn��t simply ignore what Ise was saying, and Ise clearly had more to say to him.


    However, Ise found talking to him frustrating and exasperating. Dun was exactly the type of person she hated dealing with��someone she didn��t even want to look at, let alone get involved with. He had a creepy demeanor and couldn��t even speak properly.


    Would he really help Carynne? Just looking at him made her skin crawl for some reason. His appearance, his speech, and his entire presence were unsettling and repulsive.


    ��������


    The conversation stalled, and an awkward silence fell between them.


    ��Ise, are we done here?��


    ��Sir Zion. It seems that Reverend Dun doesn��t really want to talk to me.��


    As the conversation dragged on, a well-dressed man entered the room. Ise gave Zion a nce, signaling him to speak on her behalf.


    Zion smiled awkwardly as he stepped in. Noticing Dun��s frown, he seemed to understand the situation and sat down next to Ise.


    ��Good day to you, Reverend Dun.��


    ����Who are you.��


    ��I��m Zion Electra, a friend of Miss Ise. I��m also acquainted with Carynne Hare.��


    ��������


    To Zion, Carynne was more like an extra baggage than someone he actually cared about. But, of course, he couldn��t say that. Dun awkwardly epted Zion��s outstretched hand for a handshake.


    ��You��ll soon receive a message from the royal family, Reverend Dun. It concerns your marriage to Miss Carynne Hare, which Crown Prince Gueuze is eager to arrange.��


    ����Marriage?��


    Dun Roid��s eyebrow twitched.


    To avoid any misunderstandings, Zion quickly rified.


    ��You understand what that means, don��t you?��


    ����She��s a mistress.��


    ��That��s correct.��


    A royal mistress. The husband of a mistress.


    In other words, a puppet husband.


    ��I understand you��re a rtive of Miss Carynne Hare, so naturally, you��ll help with this, won��t you?��


    ����I��m currently����


    ��I trust you��ll assist without hesitation. It��s not too difficult, really. Other people will help as well, but I wanted to make sure you were informed.��


    Zion Electra smiled as he spoke, nodding toward Dun.


    And with that, the conversation was over.


    Not long after Zion left, Dun received a more formal exnation from a royal envoy.


    Crown Prince Gueuze wanted Carynne Hare as his mistress.


    Not just a mistress for a day or two, but someone he wanted by his side long-term. It was clear he intended to do what he had failed to do with Carynne��s mother, Catherine.


    Even though rumors would spread and people would call it immoral, no one wanted to displease the prince who was soon to be king. The current king��s life was nearly at its end, and Crown Prince Gueuze��s ascension was inevitable. Since it had been many years since the Crown Princess, mother of Prince Lewis, had passed, there was little ground for criticism.


    Crown Prince Gueuze wouldn��t let Carynne slip away.


    Catherine had used marriage as an excuse to flee to the Hare estate, where she stayed until her death, never returning. It was clear Gueuze wasn��t going to make the same mistake twice.


    The wedding was to take ce in the capital. There would be a blessing ceremony at the cathedral, followed by a celebration at the royal pce, where Carynne would stay.


    ����No mention of leaving the pace.��


    Dun traced his fingers over the end of the letter. Crown Prince Gueuze intended to keep Carynne in the pce permanently, just like his other mistresses.


    ����Why me, of all people����


    Dun had often heard about Crown Prince Gueuze from Catherine.


    The prince had a penchant for mutting people. Hemitted many atrocious acts. Yet, despite all that, despite everything�� Catherine had still��


    Dun shook his head.


    Why had Carynne chosen him as her puppet husband? Was it, as Ise and Zion suggested, a plea for help? A way to escape from this situation?


    But Dun knew Carynne better than most.


    From the past she couldn��t remember to the present, Carynne had always acted rationally, even in the midst of madness. Even when she was drugged and tried to hang herself in the garden at night, there had been a pattern.


    If Carynne had named him, there must have been a reason. The problem was that Dun didn��t know what that reason was.


    Why?


    Carynne had already dered their engagement broken. Through the lord, she had even said she wouldn��t ever see him again. So why had she chosen him, even as her puppet husband?


    Was she asking for help?


    From a man she had discarded?  /subliminalwayfarer


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