《Sacrifice》
The Visit
"Mr. Michael Strong?" the receptionist asked the man in front of her desk.
"Yes, Ma¡¯am, I am Michael Strong," the man said.
"It is good to have you here, Mr. Strong," the receptionist said with a smile. ¡°I believe you would like to meet with Dr. Richard?¡±
¡°Michael nodded. ¡°Yes, please.¡±
"You are very brave and kind to do this,¡± she said.
Michael took his eyes off her face which glowed with admiration. He bit the inside of his lip, uncomfortable at the praise.
"Thank you," Michael said, scratching his jaw. He felt a short stubble on his chin. He thought to cutit but didn¡¯t feel much inclined. "When do I meet the family though?"
"Today actually," the receptionist said. "They are waiting on the second floor. Please take the stairs and then go right and into Dr. Richard''s office. You won¡¯t miss it."
"Thank you," Michael said. "And good day toyou."
Michael said his goodbyes and navigated the halls. The hospital was a large building, and a sharp medicinal smell permeated throughout the place. People moved to and fro¡ªnurses, patients, and doctors. Every day sick people entered the hospital, and while manylefthealed, some weren¡¯t so fortunate.
Michael found the staircase where a bright beam of light intruded through a window above the first set of stairs. He kept his eyes on the steps as he ascended them and found himself a little out of breath when he reached the second floor. He looked around and saw nobody was looking at him.
Michael took a right to another set of halls. He gave a look at the epitaphs above the rooms. He happened upon an open one and over it, it said:
Dr. Richard Hendricks, Surgeon
Inside he saw three people were seated¡ªthe good doctor at his desk, and a man and woman across him.
"Thank you so so much, Mister," the woman said holding Michael¡¯s hands. "You don''t know what you have done for us, or for our sweet Ana." Her cheeks were stained with tears, but she smiled beautifully. Michael¡¯s heart was filled with sympathy.
Michael searched for words to speak. What could he say to alleviate a pain as deep as her¡¯s? But before he could, the man spoke with a hard glare in his eyes.
"I hope you are not lying coming to here," the man said. "You mustn¡¯tthinkthis as a joke, boy. My daughter is everything to us and God bless if you¡ª"
"Hush, Thomas," the woman said, glaring at her husband and then returned her gaze back to Michael. "I apologize for my husband here. He is very worried for Ana. You must understand what we are going through."If you encounter this story on Amazon, note that it''s taken without permission from the author. Report it.
"I understand," Michael said. "I can see she means a lot to you¡±¡ªHe met Thomas¡¯ eyes¡ª¡°I am not lying. I am going to do it.¡±
When Michael made his remark, Thomas¡¯ eyes softened and he looked very tired. His whole demeanor changed and he looked anold person.
"Thank you, Michael," He said in a soft voice.
Dr. Richard asked the couple to wait outside. He said he wanted to have a private conversation with Michael. The couple left with a polite nod towards Michael. As they left, Dr. Richard closed the door shut and then sat at his desk. Michael felt a little nervous when he took a seat opposite him.
They sat in silence for a few seconds as if both didn¡¯t know what to speak to the other. Michael would not dare break the silence. Michael observed the doctor. Dr. Richard appeared a little shorter than him, had graying hair, and trimmed spectacles. He wore the doctor''s white coat and adorned a stethoscope around this neck. He looked a typical physician and Michael was certain about it, a learned man.
Dr. Richard was the one to break the monotony.
"Michael, do you know what you are doing?" Dr. Richard asked.
"Yes, doctor," Michael said. "I am donating my organs."
"Do you understand it will kill you?"
"Yes," Michael said without any hesitation. "I am willing."
Another silence filled the space. Dr. Richard stared at Michael as if trying to find a hint of fear in him. Would he call it off if he found Michael uncertain?
But Michael sat there with a determined face and nothing else.
"Wow," the doctor said, raising his eyebrows in a troubled expression. "You are serious about this. A reason why I didn¡¯t want to talk it over the phone."
"Yes, doctor," Michael said. "I have said yes many times now."
"I did not mean to question you¡ªalright, I did mean to question you. This is a very heavy subject, Michael and you are young," Dr. Richard said.
"I am twenty-one."
"Twenty-one is young. You haven''t even started living properly yet."
"I think I have it better. Many people can''t live their life. Ana being a prime example."
"Yes, but there are reasons for it."
"I have my reasons too," Michael pointed out.
"Are you doing this cause you don''t want to live?"
"¡If I am?"
"Sorry, that was, that was rude," Michael said, a bad taste in his mouth.
Michael rubbed his face at his own behavior. He knew he should not be talking to doctors in such a harsh tone. The doctor was looking out for him. He was just very much annoyed at being repeatedly questioned about his decision.
"No, it''s ok," Dr. Richard said. "It is just that we haven''t done this kind of surgery before."
Dr. Richard stood up and walked towards the window, looking out. "Our job is to protect human life. Of course, there is always an uncertainty that they will die," he sighed and turned to Michael. "But Michael, youwilldie."
Michael said nothing but just looked at him. Dr. Richard sat again and pulled out a file.
"Let me tell you the gist of it," Dr. Richards said. "You, Henry Strong, age 21, male, will be donating your heart, liver and a lobe of your lung for one Ana Fortier, age 19, female."
Michael nods.
"As you will a single donor, there is the case that there will be a lesser chance of rejection. But it will be very risky. It can fail. You will die in either case. So I need you to at least think this through."
"I may die," Michael said. "But I may, just maybe, be able to save her."
Dr. Richard sighed and gave a tight smile. He thought he could scare Michael or make him see a reason he might have left, but he was wrong. He pulled out a number of papers from the file.
"These are the papers I need you to sign," Dr. Richard said. "They tell that you are doing this at your own sane and conscious volition, have accepted to the donor screenings which basically will be to test if you have diseases, and that is basically it. You need to bring your next of kin."
"That won''t be necessary," Michael said and started to read the papers.
"No, it is. Your next of kin is there to vouch for your history and collect your donor pay."
"I have a doctor with my full history," Michael said.
"Ok then, who receives the money?"
"Charity," Michael said, making Dr. Richard raised his eyebrow in question. "My parents are dead."
Meeting Ana
Michael had signed all the papers. It took him some time. He was sure he had never signed his own name this many times in his life. Every rigid M, every loop of the L, the quick draw of an S, one paper after another. He was signing over his body, his life, and all he felt was nothing. No remorse, no pride, no joy. Yet, the heaviness was not there like before.
"There," Michael said, drawing a line under his signature. "Please tell me this is the last one."
"It is the last," Dr. Richard said, sorting the papers. "You are legally set to be a donor now. All that remains are the check-ups."
"When will I have these checkups?"
"In two days or so."
"Okay then," Michael said, standing. "Can I go?"
"Hold on, Michael," Dr. Richard said, "I would like you to meet the patient first."
Michael tensed at this request. "I don¡¯t know, Dr. Richard," Michael said with a nervous smile. "It is not necessary for the surgery, is it?"
"From a medical point, it''s not. But, you should. You are giving away your life for a stranger¡ªbest you make sure you know who it is."
Michael stood thinking. He didn¡¯t want to meet this person. He didn¡¯t know what kind of conversation would he have with the person.
"What if I don''t like the person?" Michael asked.
"What if you like the person?" Dr. Richard answered.
Michael clicked his tongue. ¡°Alright.¡±
Michael walked behind Dr. Richard, following him to meet Ana Fortier. He was happy to leave the claustrophobic office to the spacious halls of the hospital. They always made him feel trapped and watched.
The doctor who before appeared grim and strict was walking with a spring in his step; brisk but relaxed.
"So Dr. Richard," Michael asked. "how is Ana¡ as a person?"
"Oh, she''s a very charming lady I tell you," Dr. Richard said. "Quite witty and smart. A little jokey."
"Oh, sounds like a likable person."
"Yes, she is. But she can be a little stubborn."
"Stubborn?" Michael asked.
"You will understand when you meet her."
Michael hummed to himself. He wondered what she would think of him. He would be a stranger to her and yet, he would be not. How would he react if somebody unknown to him decided to give their life for him? Michael weighted these thoughts until they reached one of the patient rooms.
"Here we are," Dr. Richard said and turned the doorknob.
Dr. Richard entered the room and Michael stepped in behind with a caution in his steps. The walls of the room were white. There was a sliding window on the wall in front of William. A bed was in the middle and aside it stood several small health monitors on a table. Two people sat at the right side of the bed on steel tools. They were the couple from before, the Fortiers. There was a third person in the bed, no doubt Ana Fortier.
The sheets rustled and a girl¡¯s head popped up over the couple. The girl observed Michael with a curious look, glancing at him from top to bottom. Meanwhile, Michael noticed a scar on her forehead, then her light blue eyes. She had short black hair with bangs, a long nose with a pinkish mouth. From what Michael could see of her shoulder, he took she was wearing an orange T-shirt.
Ana turned to the doctor and smiled. "Hello there, Dr. Richard, who is this with you?"
"Easy there, Ana," Dr. Richard said. "You shouldn¡¯t move much. You should rest."
¡°That is what I have been telling her,¡± Mrs. Fortier said, staring at Ana half in annoyance and half in worry.
The couple looked back to address them. They gave a quick glance to Michael and smiled at him. Michael returned their smile with a nod.
"I am feeling better now," Ana said. "It is not like I am running and jumping around."
Ana looked at Michael. "Are you my donor?"
Michael was taken aback by this direct question¡ªeven her parents went stiff.
"Uh, yes, I am, I am your donor," Michael said.
Ana pursed her lips. Her upbeat energy shrunk and she looked away. He must have reminded her of her dilemma, Michael thought.
Ana looked back again, trying to appear as friendly as she could. ¡°Thank you for helping me.¡±
The small smile didn¡¯t quite reach her eyes, but Michael felt she was honest.
Dr. Richard smiled. "You two seem to have started talking already."
He excused himself and told Michael to make himself familiar. Michael was going to protest about leaving him alone but he was still too embarrassed to utter a wordIf you discover this tale on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the violation.
At Ms. Fortier''s insistence, Michael pulled a stool from the side and joined them. It was awkward when nobody was speaking. Michael put his fears aside and broke the ice.
"So," Michael said in a forced casual tone, "what were you guys talking about?"
Despite his initial misgivings, Michael was having a good time talking to the family. Ana, as Dr. Richard had said, was quite the jester. It was hard to believe the person before him was dying. She seemed so full of life, a ball of light which colored the dull walls of the room with her voice and laughter. Ana was laughing, making faces, telling jokes¡ªand Mr. and Mrs. Fortier were laughing and smiling too.
Lots of emotions started to well up inside Michael. He had forgotten about family¡ how a happy family looked. The more he looked at them, the more a deep longing started to surface in his heart.
Thomas''s phone buzzed. He grimaced as he looked at its screen.
"Dad, everything good?" Ana asked.
"Oh, it¡¯s nothing," Thomas replied. "Have to go to work."
"You should go, Dad," Ana said and turned to her mother. "And you too, Mom. I know you two have not eaten anything."
"Ana, its fine. You don''t have to worry."
"Yes I do have to worry," Ana said. "I may be sick, but that does not have to be that you have to be sick too because of me."
Michael looked at the exchange in silence. A battle of concern against concern and worry against worry. It made him a little envious at their bond and embarrassed too. He felt like he was intruding on a personal moment.
Her parents argued, but Ana didn''t budge and at last, her parents had to give up. They gave her a hug while Mr. Thomas directed a handshake at Michael which he fumbled to grab while standing up. They said their goodbyes and were gone.
After the departure of the two, Michael didn¡¯t know what to do. He didn''t speak. He didn''t know what to speak. Michael thought he should leave but before he could say anything, Ana beat him to it.
¡°Little awkward, isn''t it?¡± Ana said, scratching her cheek.
¡°Uh, a little bit,¡± Michael said, fidgeting in his seat. ¡°Well, we haven¡¯t met before.¡±
¡°Hm, we should learn about each other,¡± Ana said with a nod.
She adjusted herself and she faced Michael completely.
¡°Hello,¡± Ana said. ¡°My name is Ana Fortier.¡±
¡°Hi, I am Michael Strong,¡± Michael said, imitating her actions.
¡°Nice to meet you, Michael.¡±
¡°Nice to meet you too, Ana.¡±
¡°So, how are you today?¡±
¡°Oh, uh, I am pretty fine¡ªlife is good.¡±
"How old are you, Michael?"
"I am 21. What about you?"
"Well, I am 18."
"No, you are 20."
"H-how did you know that?"
"Dr. Richard told me."
"Oh, how rude of him," Ana said, massaging her face with her hand. "How could he give it so?"
"Maybe cause I am the one going to save you," Michael said which he regretted a second later.
"Wow, you talked like some hero or something," Ana said.
"I am sorry. It just came out."
"It''s ok. I am dying."
"¡I am sorry to hear that," Michel said, averting his eyes.
Michael started at the window. The sky was deep blue. A rustle went through the bed and Michael found Ana had laid down. Michael found she appeared different. The cheerfulness of Ana walked away, and there stood instead a face of monotony staring at the white ceiling of the room.
Michael pushed his stool to the wall and leaned against it. Ana looked at him through the corner of her eyes.
"It is so¡ I don''t know what to say," Ana said.
"Same," Michael said. "I don''t know what to say."
Ana turned on her side, facing away from the Michael. Michael looked at Ana wondering what her mind was going through.
"It was a week ago," Ana said. "I came back from college. We had a girl''s volleyball match that day. It was going so well" Ana turned on her back, a faint smile present on her lips, yet her eyes remained vacant. "I was running all over the court. I can say I was the best player there without any doubt. I dived, struck, dug, basically a one-woman team."
"Sounds you were pretty good at volleyball," Michael said with a chuckle.
"Yeah, and we won thanks to me," Ana said, patting her shoulder. "We celebrated and I came back home. Two steps in from the doorway, my heart feels like somebody speared me and I didn''t know anymore and I hit my head on the chair. Sweet dreams."
"God that''s horrible," Michael said and he looked at her forehead. "So the scar on your head?"
"Yep," Ana said and snorted. "My battle scar. I showed the chair who''s boss"
"Seems like you used your head in this battle."
Ana gave a surprised glance at Michael who was trying not to grin. She burst out laughing.
"My god, that was so bad!" Ana said between giggles.
"Sorry, I couldn¡¯t help it," Michael said, covering his mouth.
"It was not even that funny."
''Then why are you laughing?" Michael said with raised eyebrows.
"Why are you laughing?" Ana said smiling.
"Cause it was funny," Michael said.
"Well, I laughed cause you gave an ¡®evil smile¡¯ like a mastermind who had just succeeded in his plans," Ana said, trying to emulate the ¡®evil smile¡¯.
"Hehehe, and you fell right into the trap," Michael said, giving the evil smile and rubbing his hands in a dramatic fashion.
Ana laughed. ¡°God, you are funny. You were so silent before.¡±
"Evil masterminds need to maintain their mystery," Michael said.
"God, save me from his clutches," Ana said, posing her hands in a prayer.
"God, let me get her in my clutches," Michael said, praying himself.
Soon, the room was full of noise and laughter. Both of them forgot their earlier awkwardness and were enjoying their little antics. At a glance, they were more friends than strangers.
"So Michael, do you go to college?" Ana asked.
"Yes I do," Michael said. "It is my third year."
"I am a second year," Ana said. "Seems we both started at 19."
"We all start out at some point," Michael said, not knowing what to add.
"Hey Michael," Ana said, looking at him with reluctant eyes.
"Hm?¡±
"Aren''t you afraid to die?" Ana asked.
Michael thought to himself. He had thought of it before, many times in fact in the past. The answer was always a no. But then, it was a regular question. Now, it was close to reality.
"I am nervous," Michael said. "Dying feels so¡ strange. To think I will die, it makes me feel sad in a sense. I won¡¯t be able to feel, to think. It is very difficult to imagine something like that."
Ana listened. She had her back straight against the metal bedposts. There was worry in her eyes. "Then, why are you doing this?" Ana asked.
It was the easiest question to Michael, but it was also the hardest to utter.
He looked into Ana''s questioning eyes. They looked old. Michael knew her situation had a deep effect on her. He found her too young. A 20 years old girl should not be dealing with death. But life never did went the way one wanted. Not even his life.
"Michael," Ana called.
"I am sorry," Michael said, looking out the window. "I would like not to answer that."
The day had dropped into the afternoon. The sun appeared low and Michael saw birds dancing to and fro on the canvas of white and blue.
"I can keep it a secret," Ana said.
"Like your age?" Michael replied with a smirk.
"Hey, let it go already. I am already embarrassed."
"Haha, ok," Michael said. "Well, I, uh, I have to go now if you don''t mind."
"Oh, it''s okay," Ana said. "Will you come back?"
"Tomorrow?" Michael asked.
"Whenever you can."
"Well¡ I can come by tomorrow"
"Great."
"Yeah, see you then."
"See you too."
It was night. Michael lied in his bed, eyes closed. It was silent in his room. There used to be voices in his house. It was in the past and even then, Michael never liked them a lot.
He wondered if Ana was still awake. Was she alone? Had her parents come back? Was she afraid?
These thoughts kept Michael awake throughout the late hours of the night until he finally fell into a dreamless sleep.
In The Park
Michael woke up tired. He hadn''t slept much into the night. He had been growing restless recently. The day had started and he had nothing to do. Michael didn''t have classes for a month. His terminal exams were done and frankly, Michael thought he needed to college anymore.
Michael remembered his conversation with Ana. He had had a good time talking to her. A part of him still thought it would have been better if he hadn¡¯t met her. He knew Dr. Richard wanted him to make a conscious decision, but he could only think it would serve little purpose to change his mind.
"Just common courtesy," Michael said to himself.
He remembered about his promise to visit Ana. He still didn¡¯t think he should go, but he liked talking to her and wanted to talk again. Michael decided to visit her after he had some food in his stomach.
The hospital was open when Michael walked in. The receptionist waved at him and Michael was surprised she recognized him. After all, she must have thousands of people come in and go out.
Climbing the same stairs, Michael found the door to Ana¡¯s room. He opened it but found the bed empty. "Huh?¡±
Michael looked around the room, but there was nobody. Ana was not there. He traced his steps back to Dr. Richard office and found him going through some files. Michael greeted him and asked him the whereabouts of Ana.
¡°Oh, she must be in the surrounding park,¡± Dr. Richard said.
"What?" Michael said, surprised. "You let her go out on her own?"
"We tried to stop her, Michael¡ªit¡¯s the second time actually," Dr. Richard said, sighing. "But as I have said before, she is quite stubborn."
"But what if she gets ill all of a sudden?" Michael said, etching a face full of concern.
"We have given her a pager to message us if anything happens."
"What if she can''t use the pager in time?"
"That is what worries me too," Dr. Richard said. A sudden look of realization came over his face. "Michael, you are here to see Ana right?"
"Um yes, I am here to visit her," Michael said, a little abashed.
"Perfect," Dr. Richard said, smiling. "Will you keep an eye on her?"
"Okay," Michael said.
"Good. Please do. She must be somewhere in the park. She can¡¯t be too far off or else her pager would warn us."
The park gave a sense of warmth. Lush green trees and grass ran the sides of footpaths. Michael marveled at the architecture of the place. Parks were something dear to him; something natural in a busy city. He had not been to a park in such a long time too.
Michael kept an eye out for Ana. There were few joggers going about their way, but no pedestrians. He wondered if she had returned to the hospital from some other path.
"Hey Michael, what are you doing here?" Ana''s voice called out.
Michael whipped his head around to the right, finding Ana sitting on a bench with a curious look on her face.The tale has been stolen; if detected on Amazon, report the violation.
"Oh, hey there, Ana," Michael said with a wave. "I was looking for you."
"For me?" Ana asked.
"Well yeah, I came to visit you and Dr. Richard said you were out in the park."
"Wow, you came a lot early," Ana said whistling. Now that Ana pointed it out Michael did feel he came too early. He hoped Ana would not be apprehensive about him. But instead, Ana patted the side of her seat. "Here, sit down."
"Thanks," Michael said taking his place beside her. "So, you come here often?"
"Yeah, sitting in the hospital all day is boring as hell. I am glad you came today you know. It is nice to talk to you."
"Oh, it is no problem," Michael said.
"Man, Michael, loosen up a little," Ana said, pushing his shoulder. "A moment you act like the most friendly guy and another you are so uptight."
"It¡¯s a habit of mine," Michael said shrugging his shoulders. "Anyways, Ana, you should not be out here alone."
Hearing it, Ana gave a deadpan expression and rolled her eyes.
"Yeah, yeah, Michael," Ana said in a flippant tone. ¡°¡®Ana, you should not go outside alone. You should stay in your bed all day, all night,¡¯ blah, blah.¡±
"They are not wrong for the former part," Michael said.
''Yeah, but I want to go out and do something," Ana said in a frustrated tone. "I want to do something myself without anybody else¡¯s help."
"But you are sick¡ª"
"I know, Michael!" Ana shouted. Michael shut his mouth in surprise. ¡°I know I am sick. I know¡¡±
Ana averted her eyes. Some people''s heads turned towards the shouting.
"I am so sorry," Ana said, her tone filled with remorse. She still didn''t look at him.
Michael gave a look of sympathy towards Ana. He put a gentle hand on her shoulder and Ana tensed for a moment, then relaxed.
"It¡¯s ok," Michael said. "No need to say sorry."
Ana turned to him, her previous anger gone and a hint of tiredness was clear on her face but she smiled back at Michael.
"Sorry again," Ana said. "I know you did not mean anything wrong. The thing is I have been hearing it all the time. From doctors, nurses and my parents. I get it. I am sick. I just don''t want to be reminded."
"I understand," Michael said.
"Do you really?" Ana asked with suspicion.
Michael looked into her eyes for a second. "You are afraid, Ana.¡±
Ana clenched her mouth. She looked away again.
¡°That easy to see, eh?¡± Ana said.
¡°Not really. Everybody is afraid to die,¡± Michael said.
"Why aren''t you afraid of dying then?"
"I am afraid of dying.¡±
"No, you are not," Ana said, turning to face him with a deep frown.
"Yes I am," Michael said. "I am hiding it pretty well."
"So you don''t want to donate your organs?"
"No, I want to."
"Is anybody forcing you?"
"No, nobody is."
"But you said you were afraid,¡± Ana said. ¡°If you are feeling what I am feeling, why do this? Why throw your life away?¡±
"Cause another emotion is greater than my fear," Michael said and smiled. "And who says I am throwing my life away?"
Ana looked at Michael with a surprised expression and her lips trembled for a moment. "Michael, I don''t think I can give up my life for a stranger.¡±
Michael knew if his circumstances were different, he wouldn''t have either.
"And is that so bad?" Michael asked.
"It makes me selfish," Ana said.
"Our life is precious to us. Nobody should force you to give up your life to do the right thing. Just cause I am doing it does not mean I am some saint. Similarly, just cause you didn''t do it shouldn''t make you selfish."
"I don''t know,"Anabel replied after a moment.
"Come now, you don''t have to do it. There is no point in thinking about it."
"You are right," Ana said, rubbing her face and she seemed much chipper. "It is stupid to think stuff like this."
"Well, now that is better," Michael said.
"Thanks, Michael," Ana said. "You know I want to ask¡ª"
Ana stopped in the middle of her sentence. Michael waited for her to say something, but Ana stared at him with vacant eyes, mouth still open.
"Ana?..." Michael asked. But, she didn¡¯t answer. Michael shook her twice, calling her name in increasing intensity. "Ana? Ana? Ana?!"
"Huh, wha¡ªwhat?" Ana said, looking around as if she had come out of a trance.
Michael sighed in relief. He let out a deep breath and noticed his forehead had started to sweat.
"Ana, you stopped talking all of a sudden," Michael said.
¡°I did?" Ana asked, still confused. "I don''t remember."
Ana looked around to find it all the same to her. Michael had a bad feeling about it. He stood up taking Ana''s hand on his own.
"Let''s go, Ana," Michael said. "We need to see Dr. Richard."
"Ok Michael," Ana said with a soft voice and stood up.
They walked together back to the hospital. Michael made sure Ana''s hand was always in his and found her hand tightening on his hand as they made their way. Michael was very worried.
Growing Concerns
After what happened in the park, Michael took Ana straight to Dr. Richard¡¯s office. He didn''t take notice of the looks some people were giving them. If he could see himself, he would see a terrified man.
Dr. Richard was also left surprised when the two barged into the room. Michael explained what had happened. Dr. Richard''s expression turned grim. He told them to relax and he will meet them in Ana''s room.
Michael nodded. He and Ana walked out less panicked.
"Michael, don''t worry. I won''t fall down," Ana said referring to him still holding on to her hand. Michael relinquished his hold on Ana''s hand. His hand was full of sweat.
"Your hands are quite sweaty," Ana said in a joking tone.
"N-nah, it¡¯s yours," Michael said, embarrassed.
"Nope. I don''t sweat from my hands."
"Okay, I was worried,¡± Michael admitted.
"I know, Michael,¡± Ana said. ¡°Thank you."
"Is it true that your hands don''t sweat?" Michael asked.
"Believe it or not, they don''t. My feet do by the way. Whenever I am wearing slippers, even in winter, they sweat,¡± Ana said and shrugged. ¡°I don''t know their problem."
"Haha, seems you are opposite of me."
"Yeah, that can be true."
While they talked, they had reached Ana''s room. Ana plopped down on the bed, but Michael insisted her to lie down and rest. Ana said she was fine and Michael had to relent. He sighed and sat on the stool, giving Ana an annoyed look. "Why do you have to be so stubborn, Ana?"
Ana smirked. "To have my way, of course."This tale has been pilfered from Royal Road. If found on Amazon, kindly file a report.
"I shouldn''t have asked," Michael said. "How are you feeling?"
"I feel fine. What happened back there?"
"I told you," Michael adjusting himself. "You were in the middle of asking me something, then you stopped speaking. I shook you but you didn''t even blink."
"God, that¡¯s scary. I just remember saying something and the next thing you speak my name,¡± I feel..." Ana said, her eyes scrunched. ¡°God¡¡±
"You are okay now," Michael said, but Ana seemed to be in her own thoughts. "Hey, you were gonna ask me something right?"
"Huh?" Ana turned her face to Michael in confusion.
"You were going to ask me a question?" Michael repeated.
"Yeah, I was going to ask you what your parents thought about your decision."
Michael wasn¡¯t ready for this question. He had tried to take her mind of the grim happening and now he was stuck with this problem. He pulled himself into attention.
"My parents are no longer with me," Michael said.
"You mean they are..." Ana said.
Michael gave a nod. "They are dead."
Ana took a moment to process this information. Her face darkened in sudden realization and quickly turned into a look a look of horror. She opened her mouth several times trying to form a reply but she couldn''t. Finally, she controlled her emotions.
"Michael, are you doing this because you have no parents?" Ana asked.
Michael turned stone-faced. ¡°What?¡±
"You are, aren''t you?" Ana asked.
"..."
"Talk to me, Michael!" Ana said.
"..."
"Michael!" Ana shouted.
"Please don''t shout," Michael said, breaking his silence in a pleading voice. "You should not get excited."
"Then, answer my question!" Ana said.
"...Yes, in a way," Michael said, a strange shame rising in him.
Ana looked at him. She looked at him hard, her face scrunching in anger. Michael felt even more shame. Then, Ana laughed.
"Can''t believe it," Ana said, in the middle of a giggle. "You said you wanted to save me, but you are, you are¡ this."
"No, Ana, I am¡ª"
The door to the room opened and Michael looked to see it was Dr. Richard.
"Sorry to keep you too waiting," Dr. Richard said.
Michael didn¡¯t say anything and neither did Ana.
"Michael, you should go home," Dr. Richard said in a kind voice. "She needs to go through some checkups. I have called her parents too. Thanks for looking after Ana."
"Ok," Michael said and looked back at Ana. "See you later."
"..Bye," Ana said.
Michael went outside the room. He stood there for a moment with closed eyes. His whole body felt heavy and his chest was tight. He opened his eyes and moved, the background passing him in a senseless blur. He didn''t stop walking. He went by streets, roads, and houses until he found his own. He opened the front door and went into the lonely house shutting the door behind him.
Making Right
Michael woke up with heavy eyes. He wondered when he had fallen asleep but from how drowsy he felt, he guessed it must have been late. The previous day''s events weighted a ton on his mind. The faint soft light of the morning sun did nothing to soothe him. He rubbed his eyes and walked over to the window.
There was nothing outside¡ªno people or vehicles. The day was an infant at the moment. His locality appeared like a ghost town.
His mouth tasted bad. He pulled himself away from the window and brushed his teeth. The bad taste didn¡¯t go.
In the mirror, he looked like a man who had been living inside a cave. His hair was pointing in all directions and his eyes were drooping with sleep. What happened yesterday had troubled Michael''s mind. He felt he should not meet Ana today, make amends, and explain, but he hated the thought of facing her.
I still need to go to the hospital, Michael thought, remembering he needed to submit his reports and do the checkups.
A part of him snapped with a no. He couldn''t face her, not when he was sure he was the one at fault. He wanted to apologize, let the guilt wash away, but he was afraid.
Michael gave a snort. ¡°I am going to die. What do I have to fear?¡±
He gave a nod to his reflection in the mirror and decided to wait for the day to begin. Still, the doubt hovered over him.
"Good morning," Michael said to the receptionist.
The receptionist looked up and gave a polite smile towards Michael. "Good morning to you too, Mr. Strong. Here to submit the records by the files in your hands."
"Yes, you are right," Michael said, showing the folder in his hand. "Dr. Richard told me that I have some tests too."
"Ah yes, the screening. Hold on for a minute, I will call Dr. Richards."
"Of course. I will wait."
Michael reclined to one of the rowed seats. The sound of number dials buzzed at the reception desk. He eyed the folder in his hands yet his mind was elsewhere. He thought of visiting Ana now, but his nerves wouldn''t allow it. He knew he was trying to prolong it.
I will speak to Ana today no matter what, he told himself.
Moments later, Dr. Richard arrived at the desk. ¡°Hello, Michael,¡± he said. ¡°How are you feeling?¡±
"Good, Dr. Richards," Michael replied and handed the folder. "Here are my reports."
"Oh, good job," Dr. Richard said. "Please follow me."
Michael gave a goodbye to the receptionist which she returned. He walked alongside Dr. Richards matching his brisk pace.
"So Michael, let''s get a few questions out of the way," Dr. Richard said while he turned over the pages.
"Okay.¡±
"Do you smoke or drink?"
"I have never."
"Any drugs in the past?"
"Only medical ones. For fever and common cold mostly."
"Mostly?"
"I had tuberculosis when I was young. Will that be a problem?"
"No, no, it won''t do any harm. Any sexual relations?"
"No, none."
"Did your parents have any illness?"If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it.
"Well, my father had diabetes, type-II, and suffered from blood pressure."
"Hm, then we do need to check your blood for it. Your chart¡¯s clean, but let¡¯s be sure of it."
"First a blood test?" Michael asked.
"Yes." Dr. Richards looked up with a reassuring smile on his face.
"So, I will have two blood tests. One before eating and one after."
"Oh, that is to check the blood sugar stability of diabetic patients."
"Ah, I see," Michael said, feeling a little embarrassed at his little knowledge.
"Don''t worry, it is a common mistake." Dr. Richard said. ¡°Your father must have done that often?¡±
Michael nodded.
They entered a room on the east end. Dr. Richard went to a nearby cabinet and produced a syringe, a thin plastic pipe, and a bottle of alcohol and cotton.
¡°Right arm please,¡± he said.
Michael took off his jacket and presented his arm. The doctor wrapped the pipe above Michael''s elbow and tapped a few times. In a few seconds, a dark blue vein rose to the surface. He then swabbed the spot with an alcohol-soaked cotton and pushed the needle inside the bulging vein. He felt a sharp prick at the dot of his arm. He compared it to a mosquito''s bite, but while a mosquito''s bite flared the spot of the skin, the syringe focused at a point. ¡°There,¡± Dr. Richard soothed.
Soon, the syringe filled with his blood. It was darker than he expected. Dr. Richard applied another cotton swab at the point and Michael put pressure upon it. Dr. Richard squeezed the blood into a test tube and locked it tight.
Looking at the viscous red fluid, Michael wondered how his organs would look like and how it would feel to have his organs taken out. The doctor said he would be under anesthesia but, he could feel it when he would be unconscious. ¡°But most times you forget it when you wake up,¡± Dr. Richard said.
So it was like a dream, Michael concluded. A final dream, he added.
"Alright," Dr. Richard said. "Your blood will be tested soon."
"When will the results arrive?¡±
"By tomorrow."
"Wow, pretty fast," Michael said surprised.
"Well, we have many blood work pending. But we have cleared the quota for you."
"Am I getting the celebrity treatment?", Michael joked.
¡°You better enjoy it.¡± Dr. Richard laughed and no sooner dropped it. ¡°Ana may need to get the organs as soon as possible.¡±
Michael''s face went pale. The park incident bounced inside his mind. "Is she okay? What was the thing that happened to her yesterday?
"Easy there, Michael," Dr. Richard said. "Ana is A-okay, but¡ it can get worse. But, she is healthy for now. It is better to perform it while she¡¯s in good health.
Michael relaxed a little. ¡°What even happened yesterday?¡±
"We honestly could not find anything," Dr. Richard said with a dispassionate shrug. ¡°It looks like it was something which could only be diagnosed at the moment of the attack Still, from your account, she seemed to have suffered from a small blackout¡ªmaybe by lack of oxygen to the brain. Now regarding what caused it¡ it could be the heart or the lungs."
Hearing Dr. Richard¡¯s account, he felt Ana''s condition wasn¡¯t likely to be stable for long. He started to feel a sudden fearlessness in his heart. "Where is she? In her room?¡±
¡°Yes, she is," Dr. Richard said. "You want to visit?"
¡°If that is alright,¡± Michael said.
Dr. Richard raised his eyebrows but didn¡¯t comment on it. ¡°It¡¯s no problem," Dr. Richard said. "She seemed moody yesterday when I checked her."
Michael met Dr. Richard''s eyes. "You two had a fight?" Dr. Richard asked, but it sounded less of a question to Michael.
Michael pursed his lips. ¡°How much do you know?¡±
"Well, I was coming to her room when I heard raised voices. They had died down before I could check."
Michael tried to speak, not knowing where to start. For all he knew, Ana must have told him everything that happened.
"Suit yourself.¡± Dr. Richard sighed. ¡°And here I thought Ana was stubborn. Yes, she didn¡¯t tell me anything either.¡±
Michael perked at this information. "Really?"
"Yeah. But promise you will fix this between you two."
"I promise."
"Good," Dr. Richard with a nod. "Now go."
Michael clasped his hands on his lap. Ana was in her bed, not looking at him. Both remained silent. He wished himself somewhere else. His earlier courage had slipped from his grasp as soon as he entered the room. He had said a hello on reflex on the spot. If there was some comfort to find, Ana said hello too.
But the conversation didn¡¯t go further from there, and now he sat, fidgeting, while Ana played with her hair. He tried to think of something, something to start the talking. He told him that it would be easier once it started.
"Uh, so did your parents come yesterday?" Michael asked.
"Yes, they did," Ana said, still not looking at him.
"They must have been quite worried when they heard the news."
Ana didn¡¯t speak immediately. She seemed to be thinking. "My father''s eyes were nearly out of their sockets when I saw him,¡± she said finally.
Michael was surprised and became hopeful. ¡°He cares about you," he said and pressed his luck. "Did you at least push them back in?" He saw a small smile form the corner of Ana''s lips but she said nothing. The conversation was in danger. But, Michael had gathered confidence by that time. "I want to talk about what happened yesterday."
Ana didn¡¯t say anything.
"First of all, I am sorry," Michael said. Ana looked at Michael with a steady gaze.
"I know it sounded bad what I said yesterday," Michael said, tightening his hands. "I had my reasons."
Hearing Michael made Ana''s shoulders relax. She shifted in her bed, facing Michael with an expectant look.
Michael was thankful for getting this chance. He took a moment to collect himself. ¡°I will tell you about myself.¡±
Past and Present
Michael sat at the side of his bed staring at an old photograph of himself framed on the wall. In the photo, ten-year-old him was smiling.
A chocolate cake was laid out in front of him at the table. Ten candles were perched on top of it, all blown out. At his sides, stood his mother and father, smiling themselves They looked younger and they looked happy.
Michael gave a scoff. They were not happy, he told himself. He believed they were, but as he grew from a gullible child to an observant person, he found out nothing was happy.
His father abused his mother¡ªnever physically. But his words were poison. They made her cry, feel like dirt. He saw it, but he understood much later.
He never held her opinions in high regard, never showed any love, and was quick to insult her in every small situation. But he knew how to placate her, how to pretend to smile. Like any intelligent abuser, he knew how to make her love him.
Michael¡¯s brow creased. How he wished he knew, but even then, what could he do? He feared his father when his temper flared. Years went by and Michael made no friends.
Then came forth the adultery. It was nothing new. It was going on for a long time. Everything broke from that moment. Things had gone from worse to indescribable. His mother cried. There was a lot of anger, arguments, shouting and most of all, shameless denial on part of his father.
Michael did suspect it. He never saw him love his mother like those of neighbors did or the actors in television did. He wondered if he had an affair, but he never did believe it.
Well, he was wrong. Resentment grew in his heart for his father. Years of staying in fear and turmoil dropped him from Michael¡¯s eyes. Dropped him from a parent to a sperm donor.
Things went on this way. His mother stayed but assured him it was over, that she was free. She wouldn¡¯t be blinded anymore and five her life to the fullest. Michael had believed her.
He was wrong to trust her. The constant phone checking, bringing his father into every conversation, cursing him¡ªshe had not let go.
Michael listened at first. But as it kept going, there came a time, when his irritation had finally boiled over his silence. There was an argument. She said it was a slow process and it was not going to happen overnight.
Michael did not believe her this time.
College came. His father died. Michael felt sad and hated himself.
Then, his mother died. He fell apart and he hated himself.
He went on living but wanting to die. He wanted to die. All those hopes and all those dreams of his younger days amounted to nothing. What were birthdays? What were holidays? What were friends? What was life?
Suicidal thoughts haunted him. Yet, he was too afraid to kill himself; kill himself and fade with nothing meaningful under his belt. He felt he had done nothing in his life. What had his whole existence accounted to? Whom was he to love and care for?
Michael was tired. Each day tired him more, each month made him squirm, and each year made him scream.
Michael stared at the old photograph of himself smiling. He tried to smile. There was no feeling behind it. It was an imitation, but it was longing one, to capture something he lost along the way, something he wanted back desperately. Joy was absent.Did you know this story is from Royal Road? Read the official version for free and support the author.
Then, in the evening, when Michael was staring at the television, a short announcement ran past the bottom part of the screen. It was a donor request. It was the strangest one, requiring multiple organs. What caught his eye was the word ''fatal''.
He whipped out his cellphone and dialed the given number. The line came to life. "Hello, Doctor Richard Hendricks," the voice said.
"Hello, Doctor, I just saw an ad for organ donation. For a girl called Ana."
William listened to the doctor, his shining eyes staring at the droning screen. He knew his answer before the doctor even stopped for a reply.
"...Well, that¡¯s it," Michael said, licking his lips. His mouth had gone dry. It took some time, but he had come clean. There were times he was scared he would shut up in the middle and not be able to speak, but he had kept going. He poured through those memories he didn''t want to think about, those memories he didn''t want to feel. Michael''s story was laid open to scrutiny.
Ana took Michael''s hand in her own and caressed it. Michael was surprised. He thought he would be not be taken seriously, but here he was being given a kind gesture. She had forgiven him or at least understood what he had gone through. His fear and nervousness were put back in his mind and he was calm and relaxed.
¡°I am sorry,¡± Michael said, without thinking.
¡°What for?¡± Ana asked.
"Not telling," Michael said. "I couldn¡¯t."
"I can understand now," Ana said. "I should be saying sorry. I got unnecessarily angry yesterday."
"Your anger was justified," Michael said.
¡°No, I was rude,¡± Ana said. ¡°I didn''t have right to be angry at you. You are giving your life for me. You are a hero to me¡ª¡±
¡°No need to say that,¡± Michael said.
¡°You are, Michael. You are doing this for me, no matter what the reason.¡±
Michael looked at Ana with a sad face. In his eyes, he couldn''t seem to agree with Ana¡¯s notion.
¡°I don''t know,¡± Michael said.
Ana pinched the tip of her nose. ¡°Oh God, you really are stubborn.¡±
¡°You are stubborn too, Ana,¡± Michael said. ¡°Remember your park walks?¡±
¡°Don''t hold it against me. I was losing my brain inside this room.¡±
¡°You could have walked around the hospital, you know.¡±
¡°Who wants to walk inside a smelly hospital with kids screaming all the time?¡±
¡°The doctors and nurses do. Well, maybe not, but you should apologize to them..¡±
¡°Grow up, Michael.¡±
¡°You are the kid here, Ana. Stubborn and rude.¡±
¡°Take that back!¡±
¡°No, they are yours.¡±
¡°I don''t want them.¡±
¡°They are my gift to you.¡±
Ana laughed and Michael smiled back.
After they had guffawed themselves to fits, they settled into a comfortable silence.
Ana bit her lip and her eyes turned nervous. ¡°Michael?¡± Ana called.
"Yes?" Michael said.
¡°Do you still feel the same as you did before for helping me?¡±
Michael¡¯s mouth stretched from side to side. ¡°No,¡± Michael said. "I feel that no longer. After knowing you, I have come to understand. I want you to live, Ana. I don¡¯t want to die, but to give life. I am happy to do this."
Ana teared up. She choked on a sob as it escaped her closed mouth. Tears rolled down. ¡°Michael,¡± Ana spoke through the tears. ¡°Michael, I don''t want you to die.¡± Several more sobs escaped and her body shook. ¡°I don¡¯t want to die. It¡¯s too soon. I still want to do things. I want to visit places. I will walk the distance if I have to. I would gladly walk. I would walk everywhere. See people and meet them. Oh, Michael, I am so scared to die, but¡ª ¡±
Michael moved from his chair to beside her on the bed. He pulled Ana into a side hug, gently grasping her shoulder. "Don''t cry, Ana. Everything is fine. Everything will be okay."
"No, it won''t. I am the one who has this disease. I am the one who should die, not you."
"Don''t say that," Michael said in a soft voice. He choked on his words and his eyes were starting to water. He never could see his mother crying. Now, he couldn''t see Ana cry either.
"I may not even live," Ana said, between gasps. Michael pulled her closer. "You will die and it may not be able to save me,¡± she said and looked at him with pained eyes. ¡°You should not do it."
"No, it''s not true. You should be more optimistic. Everything... everything will be okay," he said, though he was unsure
"Why is this happening, Michael?" Ana asked. "Why is life so cruel?"
"I don''t know," Michael said, tears falling from his eyes. "Maybe it is a test. Maybe it is just a coincidence. It is sad. I don¡¯t know what else to call it. But, I tell you, and believe me, it can be worthwhile in the end. If you keep going, somewhere, sometime, you will find a way to smile laugh and feel again, no matter how dark the days may come,¡± Michael said and gave a lopsided smile. ¡°And don''t be surprised if you would find it in a hospital."
Ana laughed and pulled him into a warm hug. Ana felt Michael''s heartbeat, and it pained her to think it would not beat in the future. She tightened her arms around him. They broke away after a long time.
The Fateful Day
Michael returned home with a light heart. His conversation with Ana had gone better than he had expected. His steps were light and his face was brighter than it had been in years. His worries were far away from his mind. All the fear, nervousness, and pessimism, now felt trivial to him, like the pre-schooler worried for her exam.
"People really do get worked over little things.¡±
The sound of sizzling oil and the delicious smell of eggs filled Michael''s kitchen. Eggs were on the menu tonight. Michael had to buy them on his way home though; he had his fridge empty of them for a long time. He used to buy meat instead, feeling they were an equal substitute.
But, he had a craving for eggs tonight and he felt he deserved them after his abstinence for so long.
The night was different to him. There was a warmness to it; a clarity which he could not understand. He was sure it was because of his talk with Ana. When Michael was walking home, evening was upon the city. In the fading light of the sun, he felt as if he was walking someplace anew. The grimy footpath, the bustling roads, the old buildings of the city, everything had an newness to them. The world became a little happier to him, a little playful in demeanor.
As Michael munched on his eggs, a stray thought entered his mind. He played and dwelled on it, and when he tried not to, it lingered at the back of his skull. Could he have felt what he had been feeling right now anytime other than meeting with Ana and making a last decision? Was there another option, another branch to climb which wouldn''t break?
He drew a blank and smiled. He was sure this time. He returned back to his eggs. The night ended.
Three days later, there was a call.
"Hello, Michael," said Dr. Richard through the phone¡¯s receiver. ¡°It is time.¡±
The bells echoed deep within the church. Song and instruments were playing. Michael sat at one of the empty rows of the bench, staring ahead at the lit podium. He was not a Christian, but the loved the music. He found a sense of hope and joy in them, without ignoring the pain. He played Christmas songs in the winter, feeling they enchanted the cold nights of December.
There, Michael thought about many things. About life and death, and about sadness and joy. The loneliness, the pain, the sense of hopelessness, and the bitter truth of self. However, he was at peace. Tomorrow is the day, he thought. All he could do now was wait.
Michael laid on the cold table. He was naked with only a towel draped below his torso. A bright lamp shone above him. The operating room was white and looked unfriendly. A head came into his view. It was Dr. Richard in full surgeon''s garb.
"Ready, Michael?" He asked, behind the doctor''s white mask. Michael nodded. "Do you want to leave a message for Ana?"
Michael thought about Ana. He had met her before the surgery. She was in her room this time. When he entered, her face fell for a minute, but she smiled nonetheless. He sat by her bed and talked about silly things mostly. But, he was reaching his end. ¡°I have to go now, Ana,¡± he said and Ana could only nod.Unauthorized content usage: if you discover this narrative on Amazon, report the violation.
"Tell her not to feel guilty. It was my decision at the end. Tell her to be happy," he said.
Dr. Richard eyes showed a smile forming under his mask. "I will be sure to tell her about it."
"Thank you," Michael said. "I am ready."
A plastic breathing mask covered his face and the sleeping gas snaked in through the pipes. He counted to ten in reverse order. At four, his eyes closed and a great need to sleep undertook him.
"Please, let it work."
Michael went to sleep.
There was nothing. I could feel nothing. Where these my thoughts? Was I even thinking? Where are the lights? Too dark. Where were my hands? Where was my body?
Wait, here! Here is my body. I can feel it now. I am¡ here.
My voice. I, I can¡¯t speak. I cannot open my mouth. It does not feel like my mouth. It felt like opening somebody¡¯s else mouth. A mouth which felt it had no opening.
There was a heaviness around me. I felt I wanted to go back to sleep, but a primal instinct told me to wake up. My heart was beating. It was beating loudly in my ears. The rhythm was building in my chest. My eyes opened and there was a ceiling. I tried to breathe.
A familiar face came above me. It was Dr. Richard.
¡°Glad you are conscious now, Michael.¡±
Ana laid in the mortuary. Michael didn''t go to see her. It had been a day since she had died. Michael had woken up after twenty-one hours after the start of his operation yesterday. He was fit as any normal day. Of course, the operation didn¡¯t proceed because of reason the doctor had yet to provide.
"What happened, Dr. Richard?" Michael asked, sitting on the bed given to him. He stared at his hands and nothing else. He refused to listen to anything else except for an answer. Dr. Richard sat beside him and sighed. His eyes had bags under them. He hadn''t a wink of sleep in his system.
¡°She had a stroke,¡± Dr. Richard started. ¡°And we found what was ailing her. It is a very difficult condition to diagnose. It is called Hypohidrosis.¡±
¡°Hypohidrosis?¡±
¡°Absence of sweating,¡± Dr. Richard.
It hit like a brick to Michael. Ana had told her she didn¡¯t sweat. How could he have not noticed?
¡°The condition can lead to body system failure or even a stroke.¡±
¡°After we sedated you,¡± Dr. Richard started. ¡°Ana''s health started to worsen. We thought to get her into the ICU, but before we could do anything she went into arrest. We tried our best.¡±
¡°She had told me that she didn¡¯t sweat,¡± Michael said.
Dr, Richard patted his back. ¡°Michael, hypohidrosis can be mild or strong. You couldn¡¯t have possibly known.¡±
Michael stood up.
¡°Where are you going?¡± Dr. Richard asked.
¡°Home,¡± Michael said.
¡°Don¡¯t you want to see¡ª¡± Dr. Richard said.
¡°No,¡± Michael said and walked away fast.
He floated out of the hospital. He struck many people along the way but didn¡¯t care. He kept his eyes down on the ground, and the bustle of the city rang through the journey.
Michael reached home. He closed the door and fell down on his knees. He sobbed.
It was late in the night when he got up. He somehow found his bed in the darkness and fell asleep.
It was still dark when Michael woke up. He rubbed his eyes and looked at his watch. It was not night, but morning. He looked out the window and found dark rain clouds all over the sky. It looked like it would rain. He recollected his thoughts and then wished he didn¡¯t. He closed his eyes and breathed. Ana was dead.
He roamed his house. His roof, his bedroom, the kitchen, he rediscovered every nook and cranny. Was he searching for something? He didn¡¯t know. He roamed more again. He found nothing and went to sit in the kitchen.
Then, there was a knock on Michael¡¯s door. He sighed and picked himself up from his chair. He went to the door thinking it was the milkman. When he opened the door, Mr. and Mrs. Fortier were standing at his doorstep.
¡°Michael,¡± Thomas Fortier said, his voice soft. ¡°Can we come in?¡±
Silent Night
The three of them sat in the kitchen. A small drizzle had set in and the rain could be heard. Michael brewed two cups of coffee and one cup of tea for himself. Tea was only a formality for him at the moment. He wanted nothing more than the earth to swallow him up and suffocate him to death. He was shivering sitting at the table, Elisa at the side while Thomas sat before him.
He kept his eyes on the rising mist from his tea. Mrs. Elisa occasionally took sips while Mr. Thomas took it in gulps. Michael, being the host, decided to speak first.
¡°Mr. Thomas, Mrs. Elisa,¡± Michael said, looking between the two. ¡°Sorry if it sounds rude, but I didn¡¯t think you would be here.¡±
¡°We are sorry to do this,¡± Mrs. Elisa said. ¡°And so, we apologize, but we needed to talk to you.¡±
¡°Talk to me about what?¡± Michael asked. He knew, but he didn¡¯t want to admit it.
¡°About Ana,¡± Thomas said.
¡°I am sorry,¡± Michael said.
¡°Are you really?¡± Thomas asked.
¡°Thomas,¡± Elisa said, her eyes hardening.
Thomas looked away. ¡°Sorry about that, Michael. I am¡¡±
Michael didn¡¯t need to be told about it. he knew their daughter¡¯s death had been hard. Their only daughter, he thought and a knot tightened in his chest. Both were still grieving and would be for who knows how long. Days, months, years, He felt the deepest sympathy for the old couple.
¡°I am sorry,¡± Michael said, ¡°I feel this all have been my fault.¡±
¡°No, it isn¡¯t,¡± Thomas said, looking at his cup. ¡°We were her parents. We were supposed to protect her and¡ª¡±
¡°Hush, Thomas,¡± Elisa said, putting her hand over Thomas¡¯s palm. ¡°We have gone through this already and Michael does not need to hear it.¡±
¡°No, it¡¯s fine,¡± Michael said. But, it did make him uncomfortable. He could remember Ana¡¯s voice in his ears and her face in his mind. Still, he felt it was his duty to listen.
The images became more vivid and soon Michael shuddered and started to cry. He put his face down on the table and cried silently. A pair of gentle arms embraced Michael. He no longer could hold himself. The guilt and the sadness broke through and Michael wailed like a child. He breathed in gasps and his voice became haggard. Elisa started to cry too.
¡°I am sorry, I am so sorry,¡± Michael said.
¡°It is not your fault, Michael,¡± Elisa said, through her own tears.
He didn¡¯t listen. ¡°I am just so sorry! God, I am so sorry! Sorry, Ana, I am sorry, I am sorry¡¡±
¡°It is alright, Michael,¡± Elisa said. ¡°It is all okay.¡±
¡°It is not alright,¡± Michael said, sobbing without control.
¡°Ssh, child,¡± Elisa said, rubbing Michael¡¯s head. ¡°I know you wanted to help Ana.¡±
Elisa nodded, caressing his head. The rain was getting heavier outside. Slowly, Michael¡¯s sobs began to lessen.
Michael looked up at a smiling Elisa. He was amazed how she tried to console him while she was one who must have been grieving the most.
¡°Oh, I nearly forgot, what were you guys here for?¡± Michael asked.
Thomas cleared his throat. Tears ran his cheek which Elisa swiped with her hand. He gave a warm look towards her before returning to Michael.
¡°Before what happened to Ana,¡± Thomas said. ¡°We had a talk with her.¡±
¡°We had visited her three nights ago. She said it was unfair how you were giving your life for her. She said it was not the right to do. We got so worried. We tried to explain to her it was your choice, that you were okay with it. I thought you had said something to her. I asked her and I was angry at you. Instead, it was you who put those thoughts away from her.¡±Stolen from Royal Road, this story should be reported if encountered on Amazon.
Michael felt a pang of sadness. ¡°Ana was starting to reconsider,¡± he said. ¡°I tried my best to dissuade her. Seems it didn¡¯t help much.¡±
Michael stood up to take away the cups. Elisa smiled and handed her the cup while Thomas gave his own. He kept them in the basin, emptying his untouched tea in the drain. He joined them back at the table.
¡°Ana liked you,¡± Elisa said, making Michael feel difficult. ¡°Don¡¯t blame yourself. There was nothing you could do and¡ I have to admit, against what my heart says, there was nothing we could do. She is in a better place. My little girl¡¯s at peace.¡±
Elisa rubbed her eyes and sniffed. ¡°We are having a funeral the day after tomorrow. Even though not needed, Dr. Richard has been kind to help arrange for the procession. He will be there and we both want you to be there.¡±
¡°Go to the funeral?¡± Michael asked unsure. ¡°I don¡¯t know. I am not even a relative.¡±
¡°We think it is best though,¡± Thomas said and smiled sadly. ¡°Do you know one more thing she said that night?¡±
¡°What did she say?¡± Michael said.
¡°She said if she lived, she was going to give you the greatest funeral in the world.¡±
Michael was speechless. Tears started to well up again in Michael. He laughed. He closed his eyes and laughed. So silly, he thought. It was so silly and just like Ana.
¡°I will come.¡±
It was sunny on the day of the funeral. There were no dark ominous clouds gathering around the skies. Michael stood at the funeral procession. There was an open casket. He dared not peek or look at it, but he knew he had to do it in a while. Many people were there for the procession, They must have been friends or relatives of the Fortiers, thought Michael. Among them, Michael felt like an outsider.
¡°Michael,¡± the voice of Thomas Fortier called out.
Michael turned around to see him. He was wearing a black suit.
¡°Glad you came,¡± Thomas said, giving a pat on Michael¡¯s back. ¡°You look good in the suit.¡±
Michael smiled politely. He too was wearing a suit. He felt awkward in it though, never having worn it many times in his life.
¡°Thanks, Mr. Thomas,¡± Michael said. ¡°How are you holding up?¡±
¡°I am fine,¡± Thomas said.
¡°I am sorry. It must have sounded rude.¡±
¡°I know you meant no harm,¡± Thomas said. ¡°I am very sad, and I think I will be sad for a very long time.¡±
¡°I may have to join you in this,¡± Michael said.
¡°You have a lot to live and be happy about, Michael,¡± Thomas said. ¡°You are still very much a young man. It would not be foolish to throw your life way in misery.¡±¡ªThomas¡¯s eyes softened¡ª¡°Ana would not like to see you like this.¡±
Michael knew he was right. It would not be nice to make Ana sad. He wondered if she was watching them right now. ¡°I will try,¡± he said. ¡°I think I will try again.¡±
¡°Thomas, Michael,¡± Elisa called out. They both turned around to greet her. She was wearing a black dress and Michael, for the first time was amazed how much she resembled her. ¡°It is time for the ceremony.¡±
Thomas called Michael and the ceremony began. People gathered and there was a polite silence. Everybody carried a white rose in their hands. All of them went by the coffin, and each put their rose inside.
When it was time for Michael, he crept to the casket. He gazed inside the wooden box to see the face of Ana, pale and dead. She had her eyes closed and her hands laid on her chest. She was too wearing a dress, a white floral one. Tears started to spill, but Michael rubbed them off. He put the rose aside Ana¡¯s shoulder, letting it join the other many.
¡°Goodbye, Ana,¡± Michael said. ¡°Be in peace.¡±
He stepped aside before he could break down. At the last, her parents went. Elisa shivered, putting her hand over her mouth as she gazed at her dead daughter¡¯s face. Her tears had no control. Thomas stood beside her, grim-faced, as he held Elisa by the waist.
¡°My Ana,¡± Elisa¡¯s voice rang in Michael¡¯s ears and he could not bear it anymore. He pulled back from the procession and stood near a tree, watching the ordeal from afar.
¡°Michael,¡± a figure said approaching him from the left.
¡°Dr. Richard,¡± Michael said. ¡°I didn¡¯t see you.¡±
¡°Yes, I got a little late. Being a doctor is quite a busy profession.¡±
¡°Well, you better join the group,¡± Michael said. ¡°I think it is getting to the end.¡±
¡±I think it might be the best. Why are you far away? Is everything okay?¡±
¡°Everything is fine. Just felt like thinking alone.¡±
He patted Michael¡¯s shoulder. ¡°Be strong, Michael, and try to move ahead.¡±
¡°¡I will.¡±
As Dr. Richard went away, Michael closed his eyes. All he could see was Ana.
When he opened his eyes, he found the Fortier couple looking at him from afar. Elisa had stopped crying and gave a smile towards him along with Thomas. Michael smiled back as best as he could and went to join them for the burial.
The night was upon the town. An older Michael sat at the end of the rows of seats. The church had a jovial presence inside of it. There were people and a choir was being held. They were performing ¡®Hark! Herald The Angels Sing¡¯ and it was one of Michael¡¯s favorite songs. The air of December was cold. It had gone even cooler as Christmas began knocking at the door. Michael stood up and with a bow, exited the house of God.
He walked through the night city, the decorations on homes, shops, and buildings all lit brightly in the dark. Michael loved this festivity. His cell-phone ringed. He picked it up and heard the all too familiar voice.
¡°Michael, my boy!¡± the hearty voice of Thomas said. ¡°How are you this evening?¡±
¡°I am doing fine, Mr. Thomas,¡± said Michael. ¡°How are you and Elisa?¡±
¡°Everything¡¯s fine,¡± Thomas said and added. ¡°You might know why I called?¡±
¡°Yes, the Christmas dinner,¡± Michael said. ¡°As I have been doing for years, yes, I shall come. I will bring some presents.¡±
¡°Good, the presents aren¡¯t required as always,¡± Mr. Thomas said. ¡°I will take my leave now. Elisa says hello.¡±
¡°Yes, say my wishes to her too.¡±
¡°I shall. Goodbye.¡±
¡°Goodbye.¡±
The call cut off. Michael smiled to himself as he looked at the gray sky which appeared black against the night¡¯s sky.
¡°Hope you are doing fine, Ana. Merry Christmas.¡±
The End