《Diary Log of a Ghost》 Log entry 1 A cloudless night. People sitting on chairs wearing black clothes. You can see their faces with sadness and grief. A white rectangular object big enough to fit someone was decorated with gold-like ornaments was placed in a loving room. Candles were lit and white flowers were placed. A picture of a young man was placed above the rectangular object. Obviously those were a casket and mourning flowers. Above the casket was a bluish mist with a silhouette of a man was floating gently. Well that ''mist'' is actually me, i''m probably a spirit or a ghost. I''m already dead. And my actual body is inside this white casket. Beside the casket, a women sitting on a chair caressing the side of the casket, Slowly and gentle. Like caressing a newborn baby. She has dried tears on her face, eyes wept but no tears falling. She''s been crying for two days straight and haven''t been sleeping at all. She is my mother. All this time, She never left my side. I''m really worried about her. I kept saying ''Mom, please take a rest'' ''Mom please don''t cry too much'' ''Mom, don''t worry. I''ll look after everyone'' ''Mom, i''m alright! Look! I''m happy and I can float! It is painful to see how she cries her heart out. Heartbroken and doesn''t know what to do. She always whisper to me words of regret and sorrow. Saying ¡±I''m sorry", "why did you leave us!", and "My baby boy! Please don''t make your mommy cry and wake up!" Those words really pierce your soul. I really wanted to talk to her but my words wont get through. Somehow I was able to calm my mom by hugging her, even with this misty ethereal body. She said she was able to feel me and that made me happy and cried once more. After that she was finally able to take a nap on the the chair. She really doesn''t want to leave me. At the back of our house, my dad sat down alone on the garden. I walked... Or float towards his front, staring at him. I saw him with a bottle of whiskey that he stored years ago, on hand. Even though he''s holding liquor on hand, the bottle is still full of alcohol and the lid is still sealed. The look on his face was full of sorrow and frustration, blood shot eyes with large tears dropping on the grass.Support the creativity of authors by visiting Royal Road for this novel and more. He never told me what''s the reason about why he haven''t drank the whiskey but today, I learned of the reason. He said "This whiskey was supposed to be a gift for you when you became a fine adult, but to think you weren''t able to reach eighteen years old......" He said as he removed the seal, twisted the lid and threw it. "Your mother wont like it if I pour this on you casket so...." Dad lifted his hand holding the bottle, swung it twice. "....first shot should be yours" alcohol sprayed on my ethereal body, I was also able to smell the minty taste of the alcohol. Afterwards, only half the content was left. He looked at the bottle, pointed it where my casket was positioned and said "Cheers, my son". He took three big gulps of the whiskey. "You''re not supposed to die before me" he whispered. He walked into my room and left the whiskey on my table unsealed. In one of the rooms, a relative was taking care of my baby little sister, she''s a year old and really really cute. Somehow, when I floated around her room she was looking at my direction. I noticed that she was able to see me. It was a really happy moment for me to be able to interact with my sister. I really regret that I wont be a good brother to her. I wont be able to play with her, laugh with her, help her with her home work and have little fight and make up later. All those wont come true now. For me, it was a dream to protect my little sister, you know. Like protecting her from animals or insects, bullies, or bad guys. I wont be able to say ''stop meeting that boy'' or ''no boyfriends!'' In the future. I guess i''ll leave it to dad. ........ Right now i''m pretty sure you are asking "how the heck did you die?" Right? Well.... When I was walking home from school, I tried to cross road. The traffic light was green so its okay to cross.... When Mr.Truck came out of nowhere and BOOOOM!!..... I''m kidding, I didn''t die like that. I was trying to make you laugh since it was so depressing. Haha..... No? Okay... Sorry. The truth is, I died because of a heart disease. I think they called it heart arrhythmia? Since childhood, I always had this chest pains or my head feels so light I passed out. Somehow my heart gave up, cant handle the stress and just... Stopped beating. Pitiful isn''t it? I think I was revived a few times but... My heart didn''t beat again after it stopped. And that was three days ago. And that''s how we are in now. Giving people sadness, unfulfilled dreams and broken promises. Such a bad child I am huh? I guess this is how life works...... ......log end Log entry 2 Log entry..... I didn''t know why I died too early, maybe its fate? Or I am just unlucky to have a heart that sucks at being a heart. Back then, before I died I felt this strong feeling of pressure within my chest, like a blackhole within me. Pain was rather slow, it started a small feeling like a needle inside my heart, then a pressure like I was in the middle of the ocean, then the great blackhole like pain. I died outside the ticket counter of the mall. So people quickly noticed me and I''ve been rushed to the nearest hospital. The reason I thought I was revive was I had this feeling of being vacuum in and out, kinda like the ocean wave. It pushed you out back to the shore, then suck you in again within the depths I was assuming what they were using was a defibrillator. Well, i''m not really sure since I was passed out the wholetime. When I woke up, I was sitting on my own body, within the emergency room of a hospital. At that time, it occurred to me "Damn, Am I dead?" For some reason I wasn''t in a panic in the beginning. I was calm, looking at my own face. I''m not sure why i''m not panicking at all, maybe I just couldn''t accept it or being a ghost is just like this. I also thought ''maybe my ghost form is just booting up and installing the emotion driver'' jokingly. Well one of those reason might be true. After I walked out of the hospital building... like a feeling of zooming in, flashes of emotions came and then it hit me. You are gone. I am dead. I was scared. Huh..... .......... It''s the fourth day of my wake, people seems to drop by frequently. Today, she finally came. The girl who I always talked to, shared secrets and promises, and one give happiness to me. A sweetheart since childhood and my girlfriend. Right now, she''s sitting beside my mom. Both of them crying together. It somehow made me happy that I''m being loved to much, also sad by being gone and dead.Find this and other great novels on the author''s preferred platform. Support original creators! The first time I had awareness that I became a ghost, she''s actually the first person I visited. I was supposed to visit her home because she had a fever back then. When I entered her room, I saw her lying down on her bed with a wet towel on her forehead. Still awake but half asleep. Somehow we were able to converse for a short time. She said "Hey, why are you late? You said you''ll come after class. It''s already 6PM!" ''I''m sorry I was late, I''m here now see? So please forgive me'' I said with the usual familiar tone I use when it''s only us alone. "You always break... your promises. Are you also gonna break the promised date.... once I recovered?" She said while forcing her voice, I guess its hard to talk with her fever ''I''m not gonna break the promised, you silly girl. I already got the movie ticket for the romance movie you wanted to watch. Those tickets were in my school bag.'' "Really? Then.. You''re forgiven. But since you''re late you''ll gonna buy me the plush bunny I saw back then okay?" ''Of course, anything for my wifey'' I said to calm her down. "That''s good, my hubby. No breaking promises okay?" ''Okay''. We always joke around being husband and wife. Afterwards, she finally fell asleep. I know, I made a promise that surely wont come true. I know that this little conversation will hurt her. I know that this might scar her for life but that''s what I''m doing. I''m not one of those people who are selfless enough to wish happiness for their beloved by being forgotten. What i''m afraid is that after she moved on, she''ll forget about me. The years we had since childhood, our future that we might probably get married, and the family that we picture in our silly talks. I''m really a selfish guy and this is how I am deeply inloved with her. Yes, I know I''m wrong but, what can I do? I''m dead. I''m gone. I''m nothing. Sorry, I cant help it. Frustration eats you when you know you''ll be gone and their life will still continue. They will grow up, feel sadness and joy, the feeling of life. .......... 5 PM. A bunch of teenagers in uniforms, boy and girls came to our home with flowers. Yep, they''re my class mates. All of them present and as you know, of course they''ll be sad. They came to see and mourn for me. What can I say. Thanks for visiting, i''ll haunt you guys as thanks. An hour later, they all went home. I was expecting that they were gonna burst crying, I was wrong. 5 of them cried our of 24. We''ll I guess that means i''m not really close to them... Or they''re just holding their tears. A lot of people came today. Relatives, family friends, kids who bullied me when I was a child, my classmates and more. I guess since this is the last day my body will be home. By tomorrow, they''ll start ceremonies and prayers. I wonder if that will take me to heaven or after life? Well... I''ll find out soon enough. ........log end Log entry 3 Log entry... Morning of the fifth day, people are carrying me to a car designed to carry casket. Dad and my uncles were carrying it slowly. Unconsciously, my misty ethereal self seems to sway towards my body, like there''s a string attached to me from my body. Well if I focused enough, It seems I can actually resist the small force. After the caskets was placed at the back of the car, the car accelerate slowly. People wearing white clothes started walking after the car. The destination seems to be the small church in our area, its gonna be a fifteen minutes walk from were they started. While they were walking, Mom and my girl was just behind the car. She was crying again with my girl. I wanted to comfort them but, my message wont get through. Even if I tried to touch them, they don''t feel anything at all. It''s a good thing dad and my girl''s parent were able to calm them again. I don''t think my soul could calm if they kept crying. What I notice in the past days was, emotions can also affect me. I get drawn to people who cries, felt genuine frustrations and grief. Also, kids who isn''t aware about death or doesn''t have knowledge about it seems to unconsciously see or hear me. Last night. I was able to convey a message to my mom and girlfriend by saying this to my girl''s little brother. At the time, little brother was alone on the garden so I attempted to talk to him. ''Hey, why are you alone?'' I asked. He was playing with two hero figures, not looking at me. "They were crying and sad. I don''t like it inside. Do you know why?" ''It''s because i''ll be leaving soon'' "To where? Are you gonna leave my sister?" ''Of course not. I''ll be looking out for them'' he was still playing with his toys. ''Hey, little bro. Can you do me a favor? Protect you sister always, okay?'' "I thought you will protect my sister forever? Well my dad already said the same thing so i''ll protect her too" ''Thank you. And one more thing... Can you say to my mom and your sister that I love them.'' At that time, he immediately looked back. He had a questioning look back then. I guess he was wondering how I was suddenly gone but I was actually in front of him the whole time. He looked around in the garden to search for me but, he quickly gave up. I bet he thought we were playing hide and seek. This little guy is actually bad at that game. He cant find me or her sister easily whenever we play hide and seek.Unauthorized usage: this tale is on Amazon without the author''s consent. Report any sightings. A good boy that he was, he went inside sneakily. Walked towards his sister and my mom and said the words I words I wanted to convey. I thought they will calm down and stop crying....... They started to bawl again. I think my plan got back fired. The brother got hugged tightly and he had that annoyed face. I''m sorry little bro, not my plan. Well at least I got the message through. ........... Right now, the casket was place on the middle of church. A priest was having a sermon and prayers for me. The talked continued for half an hour before he could finally end the ceremony. The final act of the prayer is to spray holy water onto the casket. "May you find peace in heaven" he said as he swung his hand with holy water. The priest has gave you his blessing! Holy Blessing buff 60m duration. Increase atk by 120, increase def by 120. Yeeeaah I''m sorry. I just got an urge to say that. Well it was getting a little depressing so you know, maybe make you laugh again. Ahaha... No? Okay... Sorry. I peeked inside the casket and I saw myself wearing a neat black suit, it''s one of those suit you wore for work or job interview. What i''ll say might be stupid but, I really look good on those. This might be the best look I had for my whole life....... Scratch that I wasnt able to wear it while I was a live. Once again, they carried me to the car again, but this time, no one will be walking. It''ll be a ten minute drive to the cemetery. I guess its almost time for me to stopped staying on the surface. People started to get inside their cars and followed behind where the car with the casket. We''ve arrived to the place were i''ll be buried, my grave. When I saw the the hole on the earth, I had this feeling of terror. My thought were ''Will I ascend to heaven when this is all done?''Or ''i''ll vanish suddenly?¡®. Once again, my casket was placed near the grave. They gave a farewell speech, placed flowers on my casket, and placed items like my necklace, wristwatch and my music player inside the casket. Those were my favorite stuff, huh. The time has come for me to descend. They place the casket abovethe grave, then they slowly put me down using some sort of belt. After they I was placed under the ground, they passed the shovel to my dad. Dad the stabbed the pile of dirt beside the grave, somehow his hands were trembling, like lifting a really heavy boulder. It all his might, he swung the shovel gently as possible, soil splashing on the casket. Afterward, dad passed the shovel to my uncles and relatives, while they were filling the grave slowly. Mom and the women in the place threw flowers. Halfway filled. Mom fainted, and my girl lost strength on her knees. I guess this is too much for them huh. Maybe at this moment they realize that i''m really gone. They wont be able to see me physically. They''ll only be able to see me on pictures, or just a memory. My voice wont be heard. My touch wont be felt. My presence vanished. It took a few minutes until they filled my grave, and placed my grave stone. Afterwards my family and the people left, leaving only my uncles to finish the final process of my grave. ........ Even though the i''ve been buried, given prayers and said goodbye to them, i''m still here waiting on my grave. Waiting to maybe float upward or maybe glow and vanished..... Nothing happened. I''m still floating here. I kinda panicked a bit because, i''m still on Earth. Am I not supposed to be going to Heaven? Is there no messenger or an angel picking me up? Is there no reincarnation or maybe after life? Nothing??? Or maybe i still have regrets that''s why I cant ascend or move on? Am I gonna be a lingering spirit? I don''t know what to do now. Please help? ....log end Log entry 4 Log entry..... I waited and waited, I stood floated above my gravestone in a trance. Waiting for something to happen, yet time past slowly and peacefully. Clouds float aways slowly, birds chirping and winds howling. ''Should I try to fly upward and maybe i''ll get into heaven?'' I thought. So I tried yo fly upward, but it seems like I cant fly. I noticed that I can only float two stories high. Slowly I floated by to the ground. ''It seems like a ghost cant actually fly''. I waited till dusk, yet only the color of the sky changed. ''Since nothing is happening, I''ll just go back home then.'' So I began floating towards home. As I float on the sidewalk, I passed down on a clothing shop. It reminds me, I have an ethereal body. I look into the glass display''s reflection and saw my misty body and my transparent face on top. ''It would be nice If I have a proper body'' I thought. I tried to imagine a human body with clothes on. As I began focusing, i felt changes on my body. Fingers were starting to form, then my limbs And body. I looked into the reflection on the glass once more and I saw myself, wearing a white long sleeve shirt and a white pants. I was barefooted and I notice my hair has mixture of my black and white. ''Huh, I look like an innocent ghost, or maybe a patient from a hospital.'' I commented on my newly formed body. I stretch my arms to see if they felt the same and they were. I started walking and the sensation was different, I didn''t feel rough and it feel like I''m walking on glass. It also doesnt have any temperature at all.Help support creative writers by finding and reading their stories on the original site. Now that I noticed, I can feel the wind flow but It doesn''t have any temperature. Somehow, this feeling is strange. As I was trying to understand myself, I heard people talking. I looked to my side and saw a student couple talking while their hands were linked. I stood there and didn''t moved, they got closer and walked through me. I only stood there without moving. Staring at blank air. ''........'' Seeing that couple, it reminded me that I wont be able to do that anymore. I felt the urge to cry yet tears don''t seem to form. ''I wonder if I can cry like a living person.'' Well... Let''s continue going home. I resumed walking while trying to see if I can change my clothe, somehow I can change to my school uniform but it the image seems to overlaps. Its like I''m wearing two set of clothes at the same time. Imagine you can see my white clothes on your left eye and my school uniform on your right eye, that kind of thing. After some time, I stopped doing that and stayed with the white clothes. As I got closer home, the crimson sky has been replaced with night sky. It seems like I took time walking. Few more minutes and I have arrived home. I stared on our front door, I''m not sure if i''m supposed to be going home. I know it''s my home for the past almost 17 years of my life but.... It feels different now. The living me is gone. I mustered my courage and walked onto the door, and I passed through. I looked around and saw our home dark. The lights were turned off. I can hear a feint cry from my room. I walked around our home, and saw my aunt sitting on the sofa wearing my baseball hat. She was my moms younger sister and she always took care of us. Rather than an aunt, she felt more like an older sister. Her face has tears, flowing like a waterfall. I felt my soul trembled. It seems I kept giving them nothing but sadness. ''Sigh- I''m sorry'' I spoke, even though they wont hear me. I went to check my little sister''s room and saw my dad hugging her tightly, yet gently. Hugging her closely as if not letting her go forever. Her sleeping face has this comfy look. I left my sister''s room and walked to where the crying sounds came from. Laying down on my bed was my mom. Crying while hugging my pillow, holding my shirt and my picture. Tear drenched bed, heartbroken cries, a dim house, a lost presence. ......... Sorry. ......log end Log entry 5 Log entry.... Three days has passed since I''ve been buried. Their daily lives continued with a missing piece of life. I''ve observed them all this time, my family and my girl. This whole week, I''ve never seen them smile. They talk with few words, sometimes an exchange of a single word. I feel like a stalker ghost but, what can I do? I guess this is normal at first. I really miss them even though I''m with them all the time, you know, talking to them. It''s already heartbreaking that I cannot talk to them and they''re talking about me or the things I like. From time to time, they do somehow see a glimpse of me. Though they think they''re hallucinating. They even said I look like an angel in white. I''m like, please. I look like a mental patient. I don''t really like the image of me being an angel. Being a ghost sound cooler, don''t you think? One time, while I was playing with my little sister. My parents heard my little sister call out my name. They thought she was looking for me, her brother who''s not at home. They picked her up and carried her for half an hour. We were actually playing peek-a-boo but since her calling my name probably reminded my mom that she won''t have a brother anymore or might forget me when she grew up. ....... A week passed by silently, they do still weep every night. I tried to maybe get into their dreams, I think I somehow succeed but it only makes them wake up in the middle of the night and cry. They said I came to visit their dreams. I''m not sure If I can actually do that though, visiting dreams. I only held their head with my hands and touched our foreheads.If you come across this story on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it. My dad seems to start smoking secretly, a stick a night seems like his limit, for now, he does look a bit cooler but smoking will lessen you lifespan, dad. I do hope mom can catch him smoking and give him some words. Also, I notice that I can somehow feel something from electronic stuff, like the TV or the computer. One time, I tried to pass my head through a TV screen to imitate that horror movie I saw back them. What I felt was that grounded static electrical feeling all over my face. It felt so strange I flew past the wall quickly and floated outside the house. I''m guessing that somehow, a ghost is good conductor for static or electrical energy, this might be why they can control lights, TVs and maybe camera recordings---- Ahahaha! I''m not even sure what I''m saying. I''m just saying random stuff. Isn''t it funny when a ghost talk about something scientific? Right?.... No? Sorry... Never mind. ....... One afternoon, my dad was at work and my mom was doing the laundry, she left my little sister in the living room. She left the TV on and the program was one of those children''s cartoon, I tried to maybe change the channel by using the remote, and what surprised me was I was able to do it, though there was this static feeling whenever I use a button. This might actually a good haunting prank. My little sister didn''t mind the program we''re watching, it''s one of those CGi movies I like to watch. I sometimes wonder, can my sister see me as a ghost, or the living me. While I was wondering about it, mom came our of the laundry room and look at the program. She looks at the program, then my sister. I bet she wonders why it''s on my favorite program. "She probably fiddles on the Remote and got there accidentally," Afterward, she returned it back to the cartoon kiddy show. When dusk came, I went outside to have a walk. I plan to go visit a nearby church or temple. Staying in houses really bores me and I can''t really use my phone, console or computer at all. They all felt tingly and I can''t turn them on. I was walking silently while looking at the changing sky when I heard a voice. "Hey, aren''t you the one who recently died?" .....log end Log entry 6 Log entry... A voice of a girl, calling out to me, probably. She did say ''recently died'' so I assume. When I turned around to see who''s the owner of the voice.... I saw no one. I wonder if I''m hearing things now. "Up here, silly." Once more, I heard the voice. I followed the sound of the voice and looked up. What I saw was a girl.... Floating in mid-air. A girl with snow-white pale skin. She wore a one-piece white summer dress, her long skirt was like a half bloomed flower, slowly spinning. Her hair has a mixture of black and white, like me. And it was also long probably reaching to her waist. I don''t know how long I was looking like an idiot, she woke me up from my daze when she spoke once more "How funny, you look like you''ve seen a ghost. Well, I am one, are you okay?." "I- uhm- whu- hi?" I tried to say something but I wasn''t sure what to say, so I kinda stuttered. "You don''t seem okay, are you still confused?" She spoke worryingly and gently landed on the ground. She tipped toed towards me and stared at my eyes. I tried to step back a bit and stared back at her. "I am confused NOW. Who''re you?" I ask what this mysterious girl''s name. "Rude! Aren''t you gonna introduce yourself first? How ungentlemanlike" she retorted. She is right though so I guess I''ll introduce myself. "Ohh sorry, my name''s A--" "OH! That''s right! You''re still confused. I''m sorry... I guess I''ll give you nickname then... Hmm, let''s see..." I got interrupted by her. Hey I am not that confused.Unauthorized duplication: this tale has been taken without consent. Report sightings. "Uhm miss? I''m not really that conf--" "FEATHER!!" She yelled suddenly, interrupting me again. "I''m sorry, what? Feather?" I ask about her sudden outburst. "Yeah! Feather, isn''t it nice? Since you float like a feather! So slow and gentle, spinning sometimes!" She explained but talking in succession. Wait, she''s gonna call me that? "Wait what? I have a name! My name A--" "CLOUD! Cloud is also nice, don''t you think?" Once more, she interrupted me. She the type that doesn''t listen huh. And what''s with that naming sense of her''s? "Or maybe Whitey? Uhm.. Lighty? Spot? Ooh! Floaty! Or maybe Bacon! Wait, that''s my dog''s name...." She kept making a name. I''m starting to get irritated now. "Hey! Miss! I''m not a pet, don''t give me those pet names!" I tried to make her stop talking. "Aww... You don''t like it? Then let''s just go with Feather. Hello, Feather, nice to meet you." "No, that''s not my nam--" "Wow! I''m actually good at naming! Ehehe... Feather really suits you, you know!" "....." "Feather?" "....." Calm.... Down... Me... "Hey, Feather?" "....." Deep breath, don''t give in... "Are you okay?" She looked at me with eyes full of worries, ''Fuuuuuuuuuu....'' I let our a breath to calm me down. She''s just worried, I guess? If We kept talking about it, I might lose it. Let''s just think she has some loose screws, yeah. Let''s just go with her flow. "Yes... I''m okay. And your name is, miss?" I tried to ask in my most calm, gentle manner. "Oh no! I''m late. The kids at the park might get mad. Sorry, Feather. I need to go now, I''ll talk to you later! Ciao!!" And she flew away as quick as the wind. ........... ...... ... $£¤%#@$&@!!. .... She just flew like nothing happened. Hey I''m not sure what happened, a floating girl that looks like a ghost like me suddenly appeared, gave me a strange nickname, pissed me off then flies aways just like that. Just.Like.That. Just who is that girl, not even telling me her name. Ain''t she the rude one? Ain''t she?!. She also said she''s a ghost, I think. I''ve been wondering. If she''s around, does that mean there''s also ghosts somewhere? Why didn''t they showed up to me before? How many ghosts are there? Did that girl didn''t move on like me? Questions keep popping here and there. Well... For now, let''s continue with our original goal. To the temple or church, then maybe to park where she headed to. But for now, I don''t want to talk her just yet. I feel like I''ll lose it. Seriously. "....." ......log end