MARK''S POV


    Recently, I have been very troubled, my mind kept skipping a beat each time it wandered and I remembered that kick I felt on Be''s tummy. Most times, it was almost always as if I could feel how it had felt in my palm again, as if I was reliving that moment. It was like a daily reminder that I was going to be a father soon. I was going to father a child I had no idea if I wanted. A woman I have started to have conflicting feelings about was carrying my child and I had no idea how to deal with that. I felt stuck.


    I had thought I loved Be and I was ready to do anything to be with her. Finally, I got to be with her but I wasn''t so sure if I loved her anymore. My heart didn''t skip a beat at the sight of her or her smile anymore. I didn''t feel at home whenever she was around me anymore, instead I felt suffocated and suddenly want nothing but to be away from her.


    The only good time between us was whenever we had sex. Those few minutes where I get to satisfy the itch were the only times I didn''t mind having her around and each time we were done I just wanted to go as far as possible away from her.


    Now, as we slightly argued as to why she had felt the need to inform Sydney about her pregnancy, Souldn''t help but remember that day. It had surprisingly been a bad day for me.


    I had just divorced Sydney and the paperwork and everything was done. She was officially no longer a Torres.


    She had driven off, looking happier than I had ever seen her. I remembered sitting there in my car that was still parked in the Bureau''s parking lot long after she had left; I tried to process the whole thing ande to the fact that I was really now unmarried.


    I had been aimlessly scrolling through Twitter when I came across the post she made few minutes ago; It was a fine selfie of her captioned, "Happy Single!" Even through the screen of the phone, merely looking at the picture, you could see the joy and contentment that radiated off her, she glowed in it.


    I didn''t understand why I had felt so sad and despondent that day but I hadn''t fought it. I didn''t want to. I felt it, pathetically reveled in it and passed through it. I remembered driving to a bar - till this day, I couldn''t remember which bar I had driven to - where I drank till I started to see so many of my replicas in the room yet I still ordered for more beer. I didn''t remember what happened after that but I must have staggered home because it was where I found myself the next day.


    Only that I hadn''t been alone, I had woken up with a banging headache to find Be lying naked next to me while the bedsheet was wrapped all around me. She had lots of love bite marks all over her neck, her breasts, her stomach, her thighs...they were everywhere. I had held my breath as I lifted the bedsheet. tangled around me only for my heart to sink to my feet when I saw that I was also naked underneath it. I tried to remember what exactly had transpired between us the previous night and how it had happened but it only worsened my headache. My intermittent wincing must have woken Be up because I suddenly felt hands snake around my shoulder.


    I turned toward her and found her shy gaze on me. With an equally shy smile, she leapt up and pressed her chest against mine as she hugged me. "Good morning, babe."


    "Morning." I murmured and my voice came out scratchy and detached.


    I didn''t know how to react. Somehow, I had felt vited by the woman I loved. I had just gone through a divorce process that had strangely hurt and was not in the mood to have sex but somehow, she had made me do it.


    Reflexively, I pushed her off me, but I made sure to do it gently. There was a perplexed expression on her face but I ignored it. I cleared my throat, "Remember to take the birth control pill." Somehow, I knew she hadn''t taken it so I reminded het.This content is ? N?velDrama.Org.


    And I didn''t know why I was reminding her to take it. When I was still married with Sydney, every time we made love, I would take contraceptive measures and still make sure she took the pills just to avoid any unintended pregnancy while I was married to another, it had made sense back then but now, what excuse do I have to make us use protection and make her take contraceptives again.


    Be looked at me, a look of surprise and hurt crossed her eyes. She looked away and then she finally spoke up, "I understand what you mean, I will take it."


    I nodded got out of bed and went to the bathroom. Even though I already knew, I still looked around, hoping, but there was no sigh of a used condom. I switched the shower to the cold temperature and turned it, hoping the cold water would help me sober up and wash away my growing anger.