We have no windows. We have no way of telling what time of day it is except for the fluorescent lights.
Lately, I have found myself thinking about Gray. His smile, his eyes, his dimples. I can''t help thinking about the one person who actually acknowledged me as a human.
I am alone. Whether I like it or not, I am alone. No matter how many imaginary realities I create in my mind or my journal, I am alone.
I create worlds where I am an average teenager, going to regular school, rather than being inhuman and unacceptable.
I have wished on stars that I imagine flying across my ceiling, wishing only to be heard. Hoping that I could be understood and accepted.
Sometimes I imagine Gray sitting in this cell with me. Giving me an understanding smile from across the room. Never saying a word like always.
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Right now, I imagine that I am at home. My (brother) Family is there. We are eating pancakes and bacon, about to go to church.
While I imagine this, I block out everything, so when the soldiers busted my door down, I didn''t react until they threw me onto the floor.
I didn''t know what was happening for two seconds, then I realized that they were probably here to kill me. The idea was the truth until proved otherwise when one of the soldiers spoke. He said, "Hey! We are supposed to bring her in one piece! Now pick her up and carry her to Allen!" They aren''t killing me. Maybe they are taking me to Allen so that he can kill me?
Before I can get too lost in thought, I get drowsy from the loss of blood. I didn''t realize my head got busted, and now that I am being lifted off the floor leaving the only four walls that I have known these past four years, I notice the excruciating pain coming from my head.
My head rolls back and forth as I fight to stay awake, but in the end, I just fall asleep.
I dream. I usually don''t, but today I did. I dreamed I was a bird soaring through the sky, enjoying all the freedom I have gotten, but then a hunter tries to shoot me down. I soar higher and higher to get to a place where he can''t see me, but I fly too high. My feathers begin to burn, and I catch fire. I fall. I fall so long that I am not even sure if the ground exists until I land.
I land right at the hunters'' feet, and he picks me up and takes me to his home where he proceeds to cook and eat me.
I awaken. When I awake, I feel like dying. My head is in so much pain that I feel it will never end.
I look around and notice that I am in a nicely furnished bedroom. Too nice. I am lying on a comfortably made bed. Too comfortable.
This room I am in is nothing more than a bedroom fit for a princess. I don''t trust it.