As they found out, the whole discussion was for naught – the kitchen door wasn’t even locked. If that was because it was forgotten, or no one truly thought, it would have been used, was anyone’s guess.


    Luckily, Prof tried the handle before starting to abuse the poor entrance. Kicking (or axing) his way into the building just to find out, it wasn''t locked would have been embarrassing.


    With all those spectators lurking around, he wouldn’t have been able to show his face in Sumpfigerort anymore. Not, that he planned to.


    As with a sinking ship and rodents, everyone seemed to have bailed in time. Obviously, rumours spread faster, than light, and the staff was already aware, the not-Guildmaster''s bodyguards got defeated and how un-excellent the Goblin was. Realizing, one was on the losing side in time was a recipe for a long, fulfilling life, or a career as a politician. It was either life-preservation skills, or it was some kind of local holiday, that Prof wasn''t aware of.


    Either way, the way up to the not-Guildmaster’s office was clear and clean. Obviously, the cleaning lady wasn’t on holiday that morning. Leaving the floors dirty before an epic battle probably wasn’t excellent.


    “Prof, you can now kick the door in!” said Mini, as they reached the office. Prof eyed the obstacle in question for a few moments.


    “Why should I kick it in? It’s not locked, and see, it’s even open a bit! We could just waltz in.”


    “Dramatic entrance, duh. No one does a forced entry without kicking doors in!”


    “Mini is right in this case.” Wolfgang seconded “It is a well-known fact, propagated by literature and plays, that doors have to be forced open in a raid. Not conforming to the reader’s expectations wouldn’t be excellent!”


    “But… I think, the not-Guildmaster is already aware, that eight burglars are lurking in front of the door. Neither of us is all that stealthy, and we didn''t even try to be quiet. It wouldn''t be a surprise either way!"


    “FOR THE HEAVENLY GAMEMASTER’S SAKE!!! RUSH IN ALREADY!!! PLEASE DON’T KICK IN THE DOOR, I HAVE LEFT IT OPEN FOR A REASON!!!!”


    Well, Prof and his party obviously had to work on their infiltration skills. Next time, they tried to secretly assault a building, they should maybe do it without a large crowd watching them, and loudly commenting on the happenings. Or probably refrain from discussing the merits of kicking doors in, right in front of it.


    Prof was somewhat surprised. Mini ought to be some kind of highly professional problem solver, and this whole assault was more similar to a bunch of idiots bumbling around, hoping plot armor would save them in the face of insurmountable odds. At least Mini should have said something. Either she was using the problem as a teaching tool, or becoming a Vampire messed up her head more than he previously thought.


    Entering the office, they were confronted by a not-Guildmaster, clearly dressed for battle. Well, he was still wearing the richly average clothes from before but was holding some kind of string instrument. Prof wasn''t exactly well-versed in those, but it definitely wasn''t a guitar or a violin, and probably not a harp either. It had a square box, a long, broad neck, and at least a dozen strings.


    At least it wasn’t based on some kind of weapon.


    “Pitiful, low-Level children! Lay down your weapons, surrender, and hope for forgiveness!"


    “Why? We are eight, and you are alone!”


    “Isn’t it obvious? I’m Level 30, have [Magic: Music] at 350%, [Magic: Sound] at 303%, [Magic: Emotions] at 289%, [Art: Himbilimbi] at 295%, and I have good Perks for playing music and casting Spells! Not to forget all those other Skills I have above 150%. You stand no chance!”


    “You are forgetting, that we have a fairly balanced team, with three melee and a ranged combatant, a stealthy Kobold, and the magical support of most of Arkadia’s prime Mythrill band! We are eight times as many, as you!” Prof started to get annoyed.


    “You are mistaken." the not-Guildmaster answered like stating a fact "I will cast Silence, Fear, and Cowardice, all at the same time, so your low-level friends will just run away, and that disgusting bands won''t be able to counteract my Spells! After that, it will be just a matter of casting Sound Strike or Musical Assault on each of you, until your brains melt!"


    “Could you wait a minute?" Prof rummaged through his backpack, and fished out that accursed rulebook "Let''s see… Magic… Page 312, Resisting mental or emotional attacks… Page 250… Sooo… According to the rules, Silence is sound magic, and Fear and Cowardice are emotional magic. Casting all three at the same time would mean, you have to make three different rolls, each with a 60% penalty. That is without the base penalty for casting Spells at a high enough power to overwhelm our basic resistances – just so you know, we all have Emotional Stability over 12. Not counting Sharpclaw, but as a Kobold, she is mostly immune to mental or emotional attacks. Since you would need to cast the Spells fast, or we would reach you before you finish casting… that, that, and that… hmmm… that would be another penalty of nearly 200%. All in all, I see quite a large chance, all or some of your Spells would fizzle. Not even talking about Mini just shooting you in the head. Twice. You lost."


    “What edition you are using?”


    “The third.”


    “Hah! That one is the worst! Here, I have the Fourth Edition! Let''s see… Ah, yes, your calculation was flawed. According to my edition, I can cast with only a flat 40% penalty and could make just one roll against the lower Skill. Also, since I have good Perks, the penalty for a quick cast is just 100%. All in all, I am still comfortably above 100%, and my Spells fizzling out is quite low."


    You could be reading stolen content. Head to Royal Road for the genuine story.


    “No, no, no. You forgot the crossbow-wielding Vampire here. Either you dodge the bolts, and have another 75% penalty, or you take the bolts to the face, which would mean, your Spell will fizzle either way."


    “According to the Fourth Edition, taking damage while casting gives only a chance for the Spell to fizzle. That chance being equal to the damage dealt.”


    “Mini’s crossbow deals 25-60 Damage, plus bonus Damage because of her Perks. An Aimed Shot to the head would give a bonus to Critical Chance of 35%, and together with her base chance, her weapon’s attributes, that would be more, than 50% Critical Chance. Statistically, one of her two bolts will cause a critical hit, so, you would be most likely dead or incapacitated. Either way, your Spells would fizzle.”


    “You are wrong. Again. A laughable 120 HP damage wouldn''t kill me, even if we assume a Critical Hit for triple damage, that would be only 240 HP, and I would still survive the hit!"


    “Hah, assuming just triple damage. That is funny! See the possibilities for a Critical Hit here in the chart. Instant Death. Unconsciousness. Dizziness. There is a higher chance, you got incapacitated than not."


    “That chart is crap! See! Broken Leg or Arm. How would that be possible with a headshot? Let’s consult the more excellent Fourth Edition! Oh… Well, it gives even more serious returns. All right, you were correct, I shouldn’t take projectiles to the face. Soooo, I will dodge!”


    “And we are back to the penalty for dodging, and how that would lower your chance to cast the Spell. Actually… Dodging arrows… Page 25… AHA! You would need quite a high [Evade] for a chance to get out of the way from this distance. That would be… adding that, subtracting that, multiplying with 2… What? 561%? Is that correct?”


    “No, I don’t think so. Ah, you multiplied twice. The correct number would be 280%.” Mini was actually helpful for once.


    “Yes. So, dear not-Guildmaster, do you have [Evade] at 280%?”


    “No, I don''t. However, I don''t need to have it at that Level. It would be 140%, to begin with since your Vampire is trying to do an Aimed Shot at my head, which is considered a small target, so the need for [Evade] would be lower. Also, you failed to take my Agility and basic Defence Rating into account. With those, I would need only 102%, and that I have. Ha!”


    “That still leaves the 75% penalty for dodging. With that, your chances fall off, and your Spells will likely fizzle. HA back at you!”


    “Not correct. According to the Fourth Edition, the 75% penalty is only for melee attacks, against ranged weapons, it is just 25%, and my chances are still above 100%! Haha!”


    “All right, let''s assume, you are right, and you do manage to cast those Spells. We still have a quite high innate resistance to mental and emotional attacks, so could still counterattack in melee. Not to forget, Wolfgang''s band could neutralize your Spells with some of their own. For example with a Spell, like we defeated your bodyguards with. That would interrupt your casting in the first place. Also, you wouldn''t be able to dodge four to five melee combatants, while casting new Spells. We can do attacking in silence, you know?"


    “Your friends would need to know the exact Spell I’m going to cast to counteract it with safety! Not going to work!”


    “Ehmmm… You just told us the three Spells you will use.”


    “Oh, right… Ehmmm… But maybe I won’t cast those Spells, and everything was just a trap!”


    The discussion was starting to get ridiculous. When someone was preparing for a boss fight, the last thing to be expected was an idiotic discussion, about what the boss would do, and how the heroes would counteract said moves. All with rulebooks in their hands!


    Prof was reasonably sure, Arkadia wasn''t a large, free-for-all LARP convention. Why the rule-lawyering with game rules then?!? Did the not-Guildmaster contract Idiotic Banter from Mini? Assuming, there was such a Perk, and assuming, it was contagious.


    Of course, the discussion had some advantages too. First, Prof learned a lot about the game rules, that had only a passing relation to Arkadia''s own rules. Second, and more importantly, everyone edged closer to the not-Guildmaster, until they were less, than a step or two away.


    “So, assuming, you did manage to cast the initial Spells, some of us would be nonetheless within striking distance.” Prof continued his inquiry “What then?”


    “I will cast Sound Strike to melt your brains!”


    “No, you wouldn''t. You yourself said, that according to the Fourth Edition, the penalty for casting in the melee range is 75%. Given, that you would still need to speed-cast, you would have basically no chance to successfully finish a Spell. Remember, there would be a few of us around you, most likely with Mini taking potshots. A hit or two would be almost guaranteed."


    “A few of you around me? Ha! That is impossible!”


    “No, it’s not. Sharpclaw is mostly immune to mental and emotional attacks, Mini is as good as… Well, as long as there aren’t naked folks around… I’m not sure about Bianca, but she still has some of the magical trinkets, and most likely Wolfgang would be able to resist too. Not even talking about myself. I don’t know the rest of Mythrillhead well enough to make a statement. So, do you have a solution to steel falling down on you?”


    “Besides pre-emptively melt your brains before you reach me, no. But you wouldn''t be able to reach me in the first place!"


    Obviously, the not-Guildmaster didn''t have much situational awareness. Or was so engrossed in the theoretical battle, that he simply didn''t realize, he was already surrounded. Well, that happened even to the best generals…


    “So, let''s say, Sharpclaw stabs you in the back – with the first attack being from stealth and a surprise, she could do massive damage – Mini shoots you in the head, twice, while everyone else starts stabbing and hacking, what would be your solution? Like in one… two…"


    “Preposterous idea! How would you…”


    “Three.”


    There are probably a few people, who would expect a multi-chapter, hit-by-hit, epic… no… legendary… no, make it mythical, battle between a bunch of underdogs and an overpowered villain. Spells, Skills, Abilities, and body parts flying everywhere. The underdogs pulling out a victory in the very last second and happily limping into the sunset. Or, more likely into the nearest hospital.


    However, when a stealthy Kobold stabs you into the kidneys (with Perks!), a bored Vampire shoots you in the head from point-blank range (twice!), a Redcap Orc bashes you over the head with an axe, a battle-hardened veteran inserts her sword into your guts, an Earth-expat attacks you with two magical axes, an Ogre swings ogre-sized drumsticks at you… all at the same time… the result will be, 11 times out of 10, a massive overkill.


    Even against a Level 30.


    “I expected something more…” Mini complained over the shredded remains.


    “Can we leave Ostwaldland already?”


    “Sure, sure.”


    “Well, about that…”