<u>CW:</u>


    Talk of relationship struggles. Almost smutt time. AND a cutie asking another for all the consent for said smutt things. mhm! 2 Lyra POVS, then a Tretion one, Theeeeeeeeeeeeen Lyra again to finish!!!


    No Jellyfish, save the two most snoozie and stubborn and the clutch sleeping in the depths of the mebe parts with my fuzzy Fae spirit and Furthonois. Shard wrapped tight in a tendril, but...


    No Beloveds either. Even though they really wanted to be here. Help out like they did with Wren and Raska but...


    I need to do this alone.


    Or... well, I mean... I need Raska. Because she''s important to this too. Both to try and help them not hate her but also because I need someone''s soul to hold onto to keep steady. And so we found a nice room and had a key delivered to them and um... just kinda wait. Food already here and soft and good smells.


    The sound of the door unlocking and opening is... kinda the loudest thing in the Dream. Sets my heart to racing and my skin to get probably really cold. Especially as they both kinda... hesitate. Right in the doorway.


    Zephin, tall and fuzzy and pretty and wearing a really glimmery blue dress that matches her purple chitin while her Amwella buzzes in a sort of... surprised meep. Two of her four arms gripping one of the other girl''s tighter than before. Three sets of red eyes locking on... on me.


    My Amwella.


    Sevy, always and still shorter than me and holding the taller bug lover''s wrist. Blue skin more vibrant than ever and wrapped in a red outfit that matches her short hair. Pointed ears twitching a bit as her deep turquoise eyes lock on mine.


    First at the sight of my body. More wrapped up than I was with Wren but... plenty of scars still show.


    Then... then at my soul. As their eyes sparkle with gentle Amwella sight.


    Two lovers lost to me.


    Souls bubbling with... well. Fear kinda like mine. Different though. Not opposite or like... afraid I''m gonna hurt them but...


    "Hi." I''m able to just barely force my tongue to get out. Really quiet still, but everyone is so still that my little word carries to them. "Um... Tha- thanks. And... and s- So- sorr-"


    "No no no. No." Sevy shakes her head and opposite hand, taking a step forward. Eyes already moistening. Next words a mess of broken feelings and ideas. "You... Lyra you don''t... You shouldn''t... I''m... I''m..."


    Words catch in her throat, and from the way her Amwella wriggles like some invisible hand is poking and squeezing I... I can literally see the guilt and shame and longing and love and... and so much.


    All the things. Most bad and painful and strangling.


    Carefully let go of Raska''s hand. Move to step around the table and stop in front of them both. Offer my hand.


    "It o- oke." I whisper, not even trying to stop the tears that dribble from my eyes. "None y- your f- fault."


    She takes my heand but shakes her head again begins to speak. Softer than before but getting louder. "Shoulda tried harder. Shouted louder. Thrown... thrown things. Books or shoes or... Or just... ran up and bit her. even if she burned me too I... It would have... have been better than... than you just... Or us all just..."


    "No." I whisper. Loud enough to cut her off. "None your f- fault."


    "Yeah... Sevy girl I really wasn''t-" Raska starts to offer.


    "You shut up!" She snaps. As loud as anything in the Dream but so much angrier. Voice shrill and eyes fighting to not glare past me at my Everflame. "Just... just shut up!"


    Feel Raska nod, even take a step back. Not out of my tendril''s tight nuzzle though. Room''s too small for that. And from her Amwella''s bubbling pain... she''s nothing but okay with our old lover being so mad at her.


    Then Sevy looks back to me, takes a the deepest breath in the Dream, then forces out. "I''m so sorry, Lyra."


    Smile at her, repeat gently, even more together than I expected to be able to talk. Somehow just... so easily still comfy around this wonderful girl. "It oke. None y- your fault."


    Her expression cracks at that and I can literally see the bubbling of more words and eternity of words she''s ready to snap and growl to deny my words.


    But... as her pretty eyes start to leak I ask gently. "H- hug?"


    And this old lover of mine practically falls into my arms. Causing us to kinda tumble to the floor as years of anger and pain and... and regrets come spilling out of her in a wash of tears.


    Zephin kneels down beside us, and before she can even begin to stumble into how to ask I reach out to hold her hands too.


    Wrap them both in an endless amount of soul tails and pull them close.


    Sit there for a few eternities and just... hold girls I thought lost to me forever come apart and together again in my arms. Feel them ache to try and make things right. Somehow.


    **    **    **


    “So… Kiss for your thoughts?” Awnya asks, jerking me from the muddle I got lost within.


    “Huh?” I reply, looking up from where I sit beside the big weird door Glyph thing Tretion will open soon to have me weave Blight into softer shapes.


    Normal. Simple. And easy ways to make sure my home keeps growing and keeps helping everyone they''ve adopted.


    “You’ve been sitting pretty quiet for a few hours, and I’ve not even heard your growling melodies for at least a day.” She explains while moving to sit next to me. “And… You’ve not let go of that shard. Started fiddling with it. Just… wanted to poke ya a bit. See if you wanted a bit of harmony to bounce your songs off of?”


    Look down and away as I let a tendril wrap about her soul. Enjoy how easily our little Jellyfish paddle and wiggle happily between us when I do that.


    “Mebe.” I mumble.


    “Sure, no rush. Take all the time in the Dream.” My patient Fae agrees. “I’ll save that specific kiss special for when you find the words you want to gift me.”


    Can’t help but grin at that, look up and over while whispering. “Thanks. J– just… A– all the Th– things.”


    “Yup. Can see that. Mostly… good things? Or bad things? Or an even melody of the two?”


    Think back to mine and Raska’s meeting with Sevy and Zephrin. How there was… Lots of crying. And apologizing. Then… Some yelling. Lots of them not liking… any of this. Like Wren how was but with less ability to accept even the little problems we got her to not press at. Not just my new soul but how I still have scars I’m not healing and… and Mostly… how they hated the idea of me being close to Raska again. How they’d stopped wanting to be near her once they arrived in my Beloveds’ Manor.


    Never forgave her for hurting me.


    But… They still want to see me again. Which makes me feel both kinda happy but also scared. Because they want to JUST see me. No Raska. Mebe no Beloveds. I… I’m not sure. They seemed to feel messily about Wren too. I probably should have asked my Beloveds to be there. Help me find the right words but… from their souls bubbling fury I’m not sure anything could have soothed them well.


    “M– mostly…” I reply and lean into her shoulder. “T– talk w– with Raska’s g– girls was… Hard.”


    “Yeah, Raska said the same.” She agrees. “Sounded all sorts of needed. But... well... lots of cleaning out of old wounds only just starting to see the underside of it.”


    “Th– they… We… Um… N– not sure. Yes. Messy.”


    “And… How are you feeling about Raska? Our Everflame still burning steady and soft?”The tale has been illicitly lifted; should you spot it on Amazon, report the violation.


    More than ever. Like… Sevy and Zephrins’ words hurt but in ways I can tell she’s not just used to but… accepts. But she easily sees how bothered I was and am and… is being nothing but wonderful. Patient. Despite how much I’d… I’d really like to do more than snuggle with my warm Everflame.


    Can’t help but blush and feel even messier at that. Reply all too quickly. “Yes.”


    That makes my Beloved chuckle and twist to wrap an arm around me. “Proud of you, girl. Seriously. Was worried you got pushed too fast into being near her again. Still worry bout that. But…”


    “Careful.” I whisper as she trails off.


    “Exactly. She is, and you are, and we’re here to keep an eye on things.”


    “Mebe. Just…” I sigh and fibble fingers and shard within. “Feel… wrong. L– like… Always assumed they h– hated me. F– for being Fae. But now… different. Th– they hate Raska. A lot. Are h– hurting to see m– me with her. Trying to g- get me t- to not. F– feel messy. N– not sure wh– what to do.”


    “I get that. Time will probably help things along.” Awnya agrees. “And… I think you should stick with the girl you wanna be with. Who’s done a lot to keep you and us safe. Not asked for anything or expected you to like… give her yourself for it all. She’s not just sorry for how things ended, ya know? She’s sorry for how everything went from the start. Adored the good stuff but… also is paying attention to the bad. Not saying those other girls shouldn’t be upset. But… sometimes things don’t work out. And you shouldn''t let yourself get torn in two trying to force a soul to forgive another.”


    That… helps. A little. Settles a bit of the ache at seeing and feeling and hearing old lover’s look at me like they did.


    Then I feel our Watcher approach, move to kneel beside and behind us with a big pot in her arms. Asks softly. “Am I interrupting?”


    Let another tendril twist back to find her soul and nuzzle it just as much as our Awnya’s. Turn to give her a little smile and shake of my head. “No. Am ready.”


    “Are you certain? There really is no rush here.” Tretion assures me.


    “Yes.” I promise and move to sit up properly, lean over to claim my promised kiss, then wiggle a bit away from Awnya and Tretion before she can react properly and tug me into more than just that.


    Ready to do the easiest thing in the Dream.


    Weave a little Blight into more than a little water or dirt or…. One of the weird things Tretion has had me figure out a melody for. Important for like… the forests and groves and stuff, apparently. The little bits that make the bigger bits grow well!


    Tretion speaks to the Manor and lets our big, less than sleepy, home know we’re ready.


    He opens the weird circle doorway on the floor in front of me, and lets in some of my beloved sea. Can’t help but giggle as all our biggest Jellyfish yip and coo at that. Even the sleepiest of the clutch is super excited to wake up and dart into the mucky sphere as I weave the song. Pulling them and the blob into my soul for a big hug and snug before turning to plop it down into the pot sitting between us and Tretion. Blight rewoven to something soft and smelly and apparently really important.


    “N– next?” I prompt.


    And… we do this about a dozen more times. Open the door, let in some tasty blight, I sing it into softer stuff while our Jellyfish play in the mess, then drop it into a box or pot or jar.


    Easy, easy.


    **    **    **


    “I really think it will like… work.” Wren insists while I flip through the pages of the tone she’s handed me before explaining such a… fascinating project. “Cost less Amwella than anything else if Lyra helps.”


    The little ones drawn to my soul this morning upon my rousing nuzzle close. Sleeping happily while I tended to my projects.


    “It very well could, and even if it costs more she can weave more Blight to replace her flame. Or the physical substance if she finds the song for it during the work. But… this seems more thought out than a simple few weeks of labor.” I prompt, looking up at her.


    “I’ve a perfect memory about certain things. And this… I made sure to keep. Was just a matter of writing it all down for you.”


    “It truly is a marvel, research of this kind is valuable beyond mere boons or thanks, Lady Wren.” I murmur and look up to her. “And… may I ask why you’ve simply gifted me this?”


    “Lots of reasons, Matron Tretion.” She replies from the seat across the table from me. “You’ve given us a safe home, and don’t like… demand we serve you or pay for that. Just live well and let others do the same. But you do understand how easily you could basically demand anything from anyone here. Lots of people give you presents, of course, but everything is just… grown from the home you wove.”


    “It’s… yes.” I smile and glance down as I feel my headstalks twist a bit in old pains and a little embarrassment. “My motives were not entirely altruistic, but we’ve let them grow to mimic that in outcome. Home, safety, and everything we could supply so those most denied those could live well. Without demand for anything to avoid… old temptations and lessons. A complete turn from what I was taught to be.”


    “I want to help with that.” Lady Wren insists immediately. “And this is how I can do that. That book contains the… the bones of my creation. How the cruel soul who wove mine did it. I know how hard Fleshcrafting can be. But I’ve been helping girls and boys and everyone between and beyond shift to shapes they need.”


    “Really? Are you still doing so?” I look up to ask.


    She nods her head. “Only for a few. Matron Awnya’s songcraft is… less demanding than what I do. I um… have to become pretty intimate with a person to understand their body and soul to understand how to help them change. And big things take a long time and can be really uncomfortable to even people who wanna be close to me like that.”


    “Aaaah… Yes. This makes sense. My Beloved’s songwork can shift without needing to even touch.”


    “Exactly. But for little ones without a body to shift, they’ll not just need a base form. They’ll need to learn how to move from soul to flesh. Just sort of... riding in a body like some bug on a shoulder isn’t enough. And could get some of them hurt if things go really bad.”


    “And there is the Radiance of the Dream to consider. The tuning of Souls to avoid Rotting away. Which… I think they’ve already done. But wish to make sure.”


    “The Radiance? I… huh. I think I might actually know what you''re talking about. But not by that name. I feel a balance Inside, like your heartbeats or breathing. That book will talk a lot about the weight of all soulstuff needing to be perfect, and if it''s not… that it dies and is useless. ”


    “This is… Fascinating. Enthralling. And incredibly exciting.” I grin and lean forward. “And… you’ll help us through this? Despite the… Well, I’ll be direct now to avoid hurting you through carelessness now if you’ll agree to it?”


    “You’re very sweet." Wren replies and seems to lighten even we gently touch on this topic, "But yes. Despite the fact this can and will bring up old traumatizing memories for me. The soul who made me was cruel. As were the Fae who later found me after I ate them. They kept me as… as a pet. Till I got away and found my Raska. But I want to do like you have with this wonderful home. Build something better. Help children avoid the pain I endured. And… and maybe even older souls that could use a second chance at a better life.”


    That… makes me pause. Ask softly. “Oh?”


    “More spirits are going to rise from Lyra’s mantle right? They’re trapped. And even if they get torn apart they’ll just… fall back into the shadows inside her soul. I think we should try and get them out. Both for Lyra’s sake but also theirs.”


    Look back down to the tome she’s gifted me. Let a few long heartbeats pass before speaking again.


    “And you wish to help with that too? Lady Wren?” I murmur after a while. “Furthonois and her Fuzzy Fae may be... tame. But every other spirit has tried to hurt our Beloved. It will be grim work. Fishing vicious souls from their eternal torment?”


    “I know. But… No one else can do it. And Lyra deserves a choice. Like the Everflames sometimes get. This might also turn into a chance for me to help my Raska shed some of her sparks, should they wish to part. Maybe even… even find a way to help them find a form less harmful than the flame they burn as. I don’t know. But I’d like to try. None of the Cinderkin seem to really understand how bad things are for the Sparks.”


    I nod, “Then I will adore your aid in this, Lady Wren. After our last… exertion outside, I’d like to ensure our Beloved is more stable and able to not overworry as much about the weight of the mantle she claimed when we step into the wider Rifts.”


    **    **    **


    I wait until she’s totally not ready, and then I pounce.


    Knock this Everflame from the comfortable sitting she was doing to the grassy floor in less than a heartbeat. Get to enjoy all those warm spirits inside her Amwella jerk in surprise and confusion that quickly twists into delight and…


    “Wait.” I whisper while straddling her.


    She does, all the mebe plans she was letting bubble through her core jolting to a stop. Some of her five bubbling Sparks want to ignore me and just… pounce on me right back.


    But Raska is between them and her flesh, basically freezing everything to a worried stop.


    “Is th– this oke?” I ask. “All oke? All spirits good w– with th– this? Us d– doing this?”


    That makes her pause. All of her bubbling with… something. Worry and realization and… messier things.


    Made sure my Beloved’s coaxed every single one of our Jellyfish away and into their souls. Since they might start singing and it’s still so easy to see how soft songs still make Raska flinch sometimes. Refuse to do that to her today. Also asked both Furthonois and the fuzzy Fae if they… they’d mind nuzzling deep into the mebe places? Like… I know this will all echo through my soul like how someone could hear us from another room.


    But they both have been nudging me to do this forever and agreed easily. Even... even helped me pick a place and time.


    But after all five seem to growl at her in pretty hungry and hornii ways… causing her to huff and smirk. “Yeah. Pretty clearly. I… Thanks for asking.”


    “L– let know if not, and n– need to stop. Oke?” I reply. “No b– bad f– feelings if need.”


    That… makes her sputter out again. In more messy ways. “Did… yeah. Course girl. Means all the Dead Cinders that you’re making sure every part of us is… is comfortable if I did this with you.”


    I nod and wiggle to nuzzle closer. Even feel confident to boop her nose with mine before burying my face into the warm flesh of her neck. Then whisper. “Awnya t– taught w– words. G– good questions. Im– important but… n– never learned before. W– want to always give t– to l– lovers now. Always.”


    “I… Dreamer’s Tits.” Raska curses with a laugh while slowly moving arms up to wrap about me. The Fae words sounding messy but… very cute on her lips. “Thank you, Lyra. So much.”


    “Welcome.” I murmur, squeeze her again, then pull back to hover over her. Find her pretty spark eyes bubbling with tears she can never shed.


    So I lean down and kiss the skin around them. Like I do when my Beloveds cry. Then, as she giggles, drift down and find her soft lips. Press them to mine.


    Taste her embers and warmth and that… wonderful tint of iron she always had. Feel her Amwella buzz and pulse as a low growl bubbles through her chest. All five of those flames just… so impatient. Right at the start.


    Like… Raska is and was too. Could barely stop herself from pouncing on me when I last kissed her like this. Pinned me to a wall or bed or… or even the floor. Lost entire evenings to our hungers.


    But we also never held back before, and these past weeks have been nothing but holding back. Always so close but impossibly far away from either of us doing more than snuggling.


    Then I do the little trick Awnya does to me sometimes, and I to her, where we slow down and gently trace our tongue over our lover''s lips. And THAT makes Raska kinda… buck a bit. Moves hands to grip my hips like she means to roll us and get on top of me but… hesitates.


    Can’t help but giggle and press more into her. Reward my Everflame’s patience with a wiggle of my hips and chest harder into her than before. Aggressively but still very gently nibbling on her lips while I consider the spell Furthonois has helped me prepare for this.


    A songless working to… to let my tendrils touch more than just this lover’s Amwella.